The World Is Ugly
by StevMarie
Summary: When Gajeel runs into Laxus on a mission he doesn't think much of it. But after a sinister witch awakens Laxus's dragon senses, Gajeel can do little more than stay alive. Strong feelings emerge: Rage. Confusion. Remorse. Passion. Will Laxus be able to control himself and find a way past his overwhelming guilt or will Gajeel just be collateral damage in the Lightning Mage's wake?
1. Chapter 1

**ADULT THEMES AND GRAPHIC SCENES AHEAD:**

 **THIS IS GOING TO BE AN EXTREMELY GRAPHIC FANFICTION. IT IS NOT INTENDED FOR IMMATURE AUDIENCES AND MAY CONTAIN TRIGGERS FOR SOME READERS. IT IS YOUR RESPONSIBILITY AS A READER TO KEEP THIS IN MIND FOR THE FUTURE. I WILL REPOST THIS DISCLAIMER AT THE BEGINNING OF EVERY CHAPTER WITH GRAPHIC CONTENT. I WILL DO MY BEST TO ENSURE THAT IF YOU SKIP THE CHAPTER THAT YOU WILL NOT LOSE ANY OF THE EXPERIENCE.**

 **PLEASE BE KIND AND CONSIDERATE WHEN READING. CRITIQUE IS ENCOURAGED BUT RUDENESS WILL NOT BE TOLERATED.**

 **THANK YOU FOR READING. I HOPE YOU ENJOY.**

Gajeel stepped into the clearing, tasting the scent of the air with his sensitive nose. Large pine trees stretched in every direction, green blanketing the rolling hills and trapping the early morning mist in their low-hanging branches. He rolled his shoulders and cracked his knuckles, his keen sense not picking up anything threatening.

He'd chosen to pick a solo mission. Pantherlily had been getting on his nerves lately with his shameless prying and Levy was too busy trying to repair the still-damaged egos of Team Shadow Gear to have time to go with him. This wasn't a problem. For some reason he'd been craving some solitude from the rowdiness of the guildhall and nattering gossips that populated the halls. So, he'd picked up a mission about tracking some runaway punks and headed out.

Boys had been missing from the nearby villages and it was rumored that they were making a base of sorts in the evergreen forests of the mountains. Most of them were troubled teens and young adults, some strong and others just outcasts or orphans. Well someone wanted them accounted for, anyway.

Collection missions, always so trivial but more often than not easy enough to complete when there were human scents involved.

He picked a direction that led away from the closest villages and started off at a leisurely jog. Nothing had seemed amiss since he'd started and he'd already slept under the stars the past couple of nights, so he was sure today would be the day he finally stumbled on a clue of sorts. The stale scent of a boy, a discarded shirt, some footprints maybe…

He froze when the air suddenly charged with electrical energy and thunder deafened the sky. He braced himself against the residual static that was making his flesh prickle and the iron in his stomach roll nervously.

"What the hell?" Gajeel growled, snapping his head in the direction of the sound. He suddenly heard the trampling sounds of someone fleeing for their life. He stood ready, his magic prepared to activate and defend against the upcoming threat.

Suddenly, a boy burst through the bushes. He was running blindly, his eyes wild with terror and cuts and abrasions across his body. Gajeel jumped in his way and grabbed him by the collar, immediately halting his sprint.

"Please! Let me go!" he pleaded, fighting against his grip.

"Give me a good reason," Gajeel looked down at him, his red eyes filled with annoyance as the frightened kid tried to break free from his grasp. He couldn't have been over 17 years old.

"Please! They're gonna catch me!"

"The only one catchin' ya is me," Gajeel huffed, turning his head to the direction the boy had come from. He took in a deep breath, catching the sent of someone else… someone familiar…

"Let me go!"

"Who the hell is followin' ya, kid?" Gajeel growled, feeling a strong magical aura beginning to surface. It was rising steadily, like someone who knew their prey wouldn't be getting away. He could hear footsteps, calm and nearly silent on the pine needle covered floor.

"Redfox?" he saw yellow eyes first, winking in the shade as they approached, and then the hulking figure of Laxus Dreyer emerged from the deep green.

"Laxus," Gajeel regarded the Lightning Mage, "Should've known it was you," The boy whimpered and pulled behind Gajeel, seeking refuge in his shadow. Gajeel tossed the shaking teen onto the earth in front of Laxus, "This trash yours?"

Laxus stared down at the boy for a moment, electrical discharge sparking the air around him as his usual bored expression replaced the energy he'd had before, "No, I don't think it is,"

"Well he was runnin' from ya," Gajeel huffed, pulling out a list from inside of his jacket. On it was the names of all the teens that had gone missing, "What's yer name, kid?"

"Please, don't take me back…" he murmured, curling into a ball on the ground, "I'll do anything…"

Gajeel's eyes flashed to Laxus and back to the kid, "The only place I'm taking you is back to yer village. Now, what's yer name?"

The boy made no reply, only whimpered on the ground.

"Mavis's sakes," Gajeel growled, walking up to him, "I ain't got the patience for this."

"What are you doing out here, Redfox?" Laxus's voice halted his advancement and he eyed the Lightning Mage warily. He still wasn't on good terms with the Dragon Slayer and he didn't like that they had both run into each other in the middle of nowhere.

"I'm on a mission. Some boys in the nearby cities have been going missing and the mayors want them found. They think that they might be up to mischief," Gajeel grunted, cocking an eyebrow at him, "You?"

"There have been a few breaking and enterings in the area mostly involving potion and magic shops. One of the owners reported seeing the culprits running off into the woods," he stated flatly, looking at their prisoner, "I heard someone in the bushes and figured it was one of the thieves,"

"Aye?" Gajeel squatted down next to the kid, "So which one are ya kid? A runaway or a thief?"

"I… I was kidnapped…" the boy stammered, looking up at the two Mages, "I didn't run away…"

Gajeel and Laxus exchanged looks, "What do you mean, kidnapped?"

"The boy is definitely shaken but is stable. He'll probably go back home by the end of the week," the doctor said politely, hugging her clipboard just underneath her swollen bosom. Her uniform seemed just a tad too tight to be standard issue, and Gajeel couldn't help but notice the two strategic buttons that had been left undone to better flaunt her cleavage.

He was leaning against the wall with arms crossed, all agitated aura with Laxus reclining in a chair next to him. They'd spent the better part of three hours in the lounge waiting for word on the boy and what he might have to say.

"He said something about being kidnapped when we were in the forest," Gajeel drawled, casting a glance to the hospital door, "Did he say anything else?"

"I'm afraid not," the doctor shook her head, flipping her long black locks as she did so, "He seems to be in a fair amount of distress and exhaustion. He went to sleep immediately upon getting here. I don't recommend disturbing him at this point. If he really has been through a traumatic experience, he needs his rest,"

"Yeah," Gajeel crossed his arms, "Thanks,"

"Let me know if there's anything I can help either of you gentlemen with," she smiled cunningly, leaning forward as she did so, her eyebrows raising slightly, "My staff and I are always happy to assist."

"We'll be sure to come to you," Laxus's lip curled up slightly on one side as he spoke, his yellow eyes sparking mischievously.

"Of course," she winked at him before turning on a pointed heel and heading down the hall to another room.

"Gihi, I'm telling Mirajane," Gajeel smirked.

"I just said what she wanted to hear," Laxus growled, standing up and following the Iron Mage towards the exit.

"Doesn't change the fact that you were flirting with another woman," Gajeel grinned devilishly.

"Yeah, yeah,"

"So, you think they're connected?" Gajeel's smile disappeared once they reached daylight. It was true he didn't consider Laxus an enemy, but he decided not to press his luck on hazing. This was Laxus, not Levy or Pantherlily.

"It depends," Laxus mused.

"On?"

"Whether or not the rest of the boys were kidnapped,"

"It would mean that something bigger is going on besides petty thefts, anyway," Gajeel popped his knuckles and cast his eyes back to the forest, "But that would mean they'd have to have a base somewhere in the general vicinity, and I scoured over most of that forest and didn't find anything,"

"If this is organized crime involving magic it would mean a base would be better hidden than your run-of-the-mill dark guild's. These people wouldn't want to be found,"

"Something underground, then," Gajeel growled, scratching the back of his head, "Those large hills would be good for that then. They would just have to carve out the inside of one. Something deep in the woods where noise would be muffled by the pine needles."

"And a gully near the entrance, so any noise would be directed towards the sky instead of spreading throughout the forest," Laxus sighed.

"I love reconnaissance missions," Gajeel smirked.

"Well I don't," Laxus growled, "I'd rather take people out first and answer questions later,"

"You could always go visit Ms. Doctor back at the hospital. I'm sure she'd be all for that," Gajeel grunted, heading for the pines, "Besides, if I do your job for you I get double the pay,"

"Nice try, Redfox," Laxus quickly followed, static filling the air around him.


	2. Chapter 2

"I fucking hate Cana," Laxus growled, keeping huddled underneath a tree to stay out of the rain whilst Gajeel snapped branches and tied them together to make a hasty shelter.

"Says the S-Class wizard who didn't come prepared in case she was wrong," Gajeel muttered angrily.

"When is Cana ever fucking wrong besides when she wants to be?" Laxus huffed, suppressing an angry current that was threatening to ignite the humid air around them.

"Piss her off lately?" Gajeel smirked, propping the makeshift shelter against a tree so he could gather needles for the roof.

"Hell if I know," Laxus griped, quickly transferring himself underneath Gajeel's hasty shelter. Gajeel slid off his coat and draped it over the roof, adding to the rain protection. He didn't bother to ask Laxus to donate his own to the cause since having a wet coat would probably short circuit him as much as the rain would. Finally, Gajeel plopped heavily on the ground outside of the shelter, taking off his shirt and throwing it with Laxus under the eaves.

"You staying out in the rain?" Laxus crooked an eyebrow at him.

"Iron and Electricity don't mix well," Gajeel mumbled, laying on his back under a tree and folding his arms behind his head, "Besides, I ain't gonna rust or anything,"

"Suit yourself," Laxus sighed, tucking his jacket underneath his head as a makeshift pillow. An uneasy silence followed between the two.

Gajeel stared at the heavy branches and watched as the rain dripped down around him. The sweet aromas of the forest were filling the air with weighty smells of bark, pine, and earth. The scents calmed him and let his mind ease from the day's stress. This was why he had wanted to be alone, to not only beat a few skulls without judgment but also to enjoy nature in peace. He wasn't a tree hugger by any means, but being out like this made him miss his days in the wild with Metalicana. He felt nostalgic and at home under the thick branches with the wind rustling through the trees serenely.

"You like it out here?" Laxus's voice interrupted his quiet.

"Yeah," Gajeel sighed, "Helps me to calm down and think."

"You don't seem the type," Laxus's voice was strangely light, like he was joking.

"Watch out. I still haven't forgotten about you flirting with that dame at the hospital," Gajeel smirked; turning onto his side and propping himself up on an arm to face Laxus.

Laxus's eyes were on the roof of the shelter, half-closed with either fatigue or lack of concern Gajeel couldn't tell, "Go on ahead. Mira and I aren't really a thing anyway,"

"Is that so?" Gajeel mused, "That's not what Makarov thinks,"

"Gramps? He wishes," Laxus chuckled, "Nah, he just wants me to settle down. Mira's nice to fuck around with but she gets too clingy,"

"She know that?"

"Yeah. She gets it and she tries but I think we both know it probably won't work. We both have too much of a temper,"

"Devil Woman? Have a temper? What a surprise," Gajeel started fiddling with some twigs on the ground, his eyes searching for something to focus on in the darkness.

"What about you? Don't you have a thing with that blue-haired girl?"

"Levy?" Gajeel's brow furrowed and his bloody eyes quickly shot to Laxus, "What would make you say something like that?"

"She seems to have a thing for you,"

"She does… doesn't she…" Gajeel was silent for a minute and just closed his eyes, "But I couldn't…"

"Couldn't or wouldn't?" Laxus was facing him now, his yellow eyes flashing in the dim light.

"Both," Gajeel stated firmly.

"And why is that?"

"She's just too… light,"

"Light?" Laxus snorted.

"Like sunshine," Gajeel's mouth turned up in a sour smile, "And I'm just one of the shadows that still haunts her dreams at night. She's not scared of me anymore but I can tell whenever I get near her she's uneasy. She's waiting for me to show that I haven't changed, that I'm going to relapse and destroy something beyond repair."

"Are you sure that uneasiness isn't just the fact she's a nervous girl around her crush?" Laxus scoffed, "Like some damn kid."

"It has a bitter smell to it," Gajeel's smile faded.

"You can _smell_ fear?" Laxus sniffed, his tone unbelieving.

"Gihi, I like to think of it as one of my more promising qualities," Gajeel smirked over in his direction, "And it's more than just fear."

"I don't believe that for one second," Laxus growled.

"But you're curious," Gajeel's grin spread until his fangs glistened in the dank light. Laxus fell silent and stared, "Natsu can do it, too. I wonder why you don't."

"Probably because I'm not first generation," Laxus said somewhat to himself, "Makes me wonder if I'm at a disadvantage,"

"You probably don't go through the Heat every year, then," Gajeel growled, "Lucky bastard."

"The Heat?" Laxus was looking at the shoddy roof, "What's that?"

"A pain in the ass," Gajeel sat up, stretching out his arms and shaking the rain from his hair. In the dim light, Laxus could still make out the scars that crisscrossed up his arm to decorate his back. They were all large and dark, tender flesh compared to his regular calloused skin. With his bloody eyes looking coolly over his shoulder, it was hard not to see Gajeel as a threat despite knowing how he'd changed. His look was still a rugged one that knew violence and all its darker sides, "Back in the time of the dragons, like any beast they had a mating season. Males fought each other, sometimes to the death, for a mate. What once was a way for the best genetics to be passed on is now just a bloody nuisance. First generation Slayers become violent. They'll actively search out and attack nearby male Slayers and then, naturally, search for a mate."

Laxus wrinkled his nose, "I have a hard time imagining that. Natsu would have done far more damage to Fiore than he already has."

"Igneel and Metalicana both showed us different herbs and ways of coping with it. If you can find a way to get away from people its manageable," Gajeel drawled, running his fingers through his hair, "But it's a hell of a few days."

"And if you can't get away?"

"Well someone's talkative…" Gajeel's mouth curved into a crooked grin, "The first and last time I ever didn't go out of town for it, I was still with Phantom Lord."

"That bad?" Laxus was facing him now, his usual bored façade returning.

"Dragons and Slayers alike have fangs, right?"

"Aye…"

"They ain't just for show. When you're in heat, your body changes. Your fangs make a toxin that when you bite your potential partner, it changes their makeup just slightly to accommodate you," Laxus stared at him blankly and Gajeel huffed, "They can't say no."

"Sounds like rape to me," Laxus growled.

"Like I said, first and last time," Gajeel stretched out on his back once more, "Natsu told me he got caught once. Fortunately for him, no one came around looking for him. As annoying as you Fairies are, you know when your guildmates need their space. Phantom Lord doesn't much care."

Laxus stared at him for a moment, taking in Gajeel's relaxed position and easy breathing, "Would you ever go back?"

"Eh?" Gajeel cracked open one eye at him, his brow creasing in confusion.

"To Phantom Lord,"

Gajeel was silent for a while, closing his eyes again while taking in a slow breath and releasing it before answering, "Nah, I don't think so. I wouldn't have met Juvia but then I'm sure she'd find her way to that Stripper anyway. And as much as it pisses me off to not be the strongest mage in my guild, Phantom Lord was no home. We were all just assets. Fairy Tail is different… caring… even to someone like me. Can't say there are many places like that."

"I guess you're right," Laxus leaned down and turned away. They both fell asleep to the hushing sounds of the light rain.


	3. Chapter 3

The next day the two set off in the late morning, after the dew had dried from the heat of the sun and the smell of rain was almost gone from the forest. Gajeel led the way, using his nose to guide them through the pines. It wasn't long into the afternoon when they found what they were looking for.

"Footprints," Gajeel motioned Laxus over to what had looked to be a well-trodden game path, but instead of the prints of some animal there were the clear traces of human traffic, "And not too old by the looks of it."

"So we're close, then," Laxus stepped forward onto the path.

"The hell do you think you're doing?" Gajeel hissed, grabbing him by the arm. Laxus gave him a venomous look but Gajeel held his gaze, "You can't just go tromping in there. You don't know who or what is there,"

"I think I can handle it," Laxus growled.

"This isn't something you can just blast your way through. If this really does involve the boys in the neighboring towns you'll get them caught in the crossfire," Gajeel growled up at him, "Or did you forget that?"

Laxus let out a huff, annoyance clear on his face, "Then what do you suggest?"

Suddenly, voices began making their way down the trail from up ahead. Gajeel gritted his teeth, "Follow me,"

They both barely made it into the cover of some evergreen bushes before the source of the voices made it to their spot.

"I'm very sorry, ma'am, it won't happen again,"

"Be sure it doesn't. It's ridiculous that I have to clean up after you," a female voice snapped. Gajeel immediately realized he'd heard it before and could clearly see the recognition in Laxus's eyes as well.

"I understand. Security has been upped since the occurrence. I can assure…"

"Did you know he told two mages he'd been kidnapped?" the female voice sounded back coldly, "And wouldn't you know that they've been hired to snoop around after the _strange occurrences_ that have been happening lately?"

"I-I'm very sorry ma'am…"

"Of course you are," she sneered. There was the sound of a slap and a tense silence followed, "If it happens again you'll be part of the next shipment. Understood?"

"Yes ma'am."

"Good. I'll be back tonight. Think you're competent enough to handle things while I'm gone?"

"Yes ma'am."

"Get back to it, then. Oh and I'm so glad we've had this little chat,"

"Same, ma'am,"

The two waited until long after the footsteps had retreated in opposite directions before Gajeel peeked his head over the cover and walked out onto the trail. Laxus stood behind him with crossed arms.

"We could have easily taken those two and gotten to the bottom of this already," Laxus growled tensely.

"Not with organized crime," Gajeel countered, sniffing the air and looking in the direction that the woman had departed. He _knew_ he'd smelled this before, "They'd keep their mouths shut, especially if they're the head of the operation. Then they'd have someone lower take the blame for it and get off free. We'd be nowhere then,"

"And how do you know so much about this shit?" Laxus steamed, his impatience causing electricity to fill the air.

Gajeel cast a devilish grin back over his shoulder at him, "I learned a lot in Phantom Lord,"

"That would be it," Laxus turned and started heading the opposite way and disappeared through the foliage.

"Laxus!" Gajeel hissed after him, "Are you fucking serious?!"

There was no response, only the sound of his heavy footfalls going deeper into the undergrowth.

"Laxus! I just said you can't go tromping in there!" Gajeel growled, following after him, "Fucking hardheaded sparky-eyed god damned ass-hat…"

"I can hear you," Laxus sighed with annoyance from up ahead.

"Good!" Gajeel barked back, keeping care to step on the pine needles to help silence his approach. The breeze turned, then, and he caught the scent of several men along with Laxus's. He froze, eyes widening as his mind began to process what was going on.

"Finally you shut the hell up…" he heard Laxus's voice from ahead.

"Laxus…" Gajeel hissed silently, hurrying to try and catch him, "Laxus wait…"

 _An ambush!_

Suddenly, there was a burst of activity in the forest ahead. He heard Laxus growl and stumbled backwards when a bolt of lightning came down from the sky, stray currents flickering into the wood and dancing past him. Gajeel rushed into the fray, activating his iron scales before bursting into the foliage and using his talons to strike down the first enemy he saw. Laxus's eyes were sparking yellow as he fired streams of electricity towards some mages that were still in the bushes.

"You just couldn't listen, could you?" Gajeel sneered at Laxus while using his Iron Spears to take down two opponents.

"If you're scared of a little fight you can always go hide, Redfox," Laxus smirked, electricity dancing from his fingers, "I'll be sure to come and get you when its all over,"

"Fuck off, Sparky,"

Gajeel jumped backwards as a volley of arrow-like projectiles was thrown from the trees. His red eyes focused on a dark figure in the branches. It didn't take much for Gajeel to see this mage was stronger than the rest. The ones they had been fighting were nothing more than hired hands; low-level mages that needed some change and could be bought over in bulk. Gajeel brought his armored arms up to shield his face as another wave ensued, but his defense held perfectly and not even a scratch hit him.

A smile made its way across the mage's face as he readied another charge. Gajeel growled, not liking the cool look on his face. Gajeel stormed forward, making a sprint for the tree to send the mage off balance. He aimed his shot anyway, not even caring about Gajeel's approach. Gajeel slid to a halt as he suddenly realized the mage had no intentions of hitting him with the next shot.

"Laxus!" Gajeel yelled, turning and going for the Lightning Mage as fast as he could, "Get down, dammit!"

"Eh?" Laxus turned just as the mage fired and Gajeel collided bodily into him, sending them both cursing towards the ground. Gajeel could feel the magic ricocheting off of his skin, although it couldn't puncture through. He quickly jumped to his feet and growled at the mage in the tree, his fists clenched as he glared up at him.

"Fucking playing dirty?" Gajeel growled, he tilted his head back towards Laxus who was still lying on the ground, "Oi, you ok?"

"Shit…" Laxus gasped.

Gajeel chanced a look at him. His nose wrinkled at the smell of blood and he noticed a gash running across Laxus's side. It looked deep and red was quickly covering the forest floor.

"Dammit," Gajeel huffed, casting his eyes around him. Some of the mages had recovered and were getting back on their feet, readying attacks as they began to close in.

"Surrender, Fairy Tail Mages," the mage in the tree dropped down, his voice the same as the one they'd heard earlier in the forest, "I'd hate to waste any more of your blood. Besides, you're much more useful alive,"

"Like hell," Gajeel roared back, taking a step back defensively. He was almost standing over Laxus, his stance wide and protective. He never thought the day would come when he'd have to save Laxus.

"Can you run?" Gajeel's voice was so low Laxus almost thought he didn't hear it.

"I'll try," Laxus managed, gripping his side against the pain, "But I won't say for how long,"

"Two minutes, that's all I need," Gajeel growled, sucking in a deep breath, "Get ready,"

"Aye,"

"IRON DRAGON'S ROAR!"


	4. Chapter 4

Gajeel put as much into the attack as he could, hitting the mage square with the attack and ripping through the trees with the shards of metal. The other mages dodged into the foliage, yelling curses and retreats as they did so. When Gajeel finally stopped he felt weak, having depleted most of his magical power with the effort. His eyes quickly found Laxus just before he disappeared past the destruction of his roar and he sprinted after him, pushing his legs despite the weariness in them.

"Now… huff… what…?" Laxus was leaning against a tree; his face contorted from the pain as he gripped is side.

"We gotta get your bleeding under control or they'll track us…" Gajeel panted, quickly shedding his shirt and ripping it to re-tie it over and over. He wrapped Laxus's stomach as best he could before finally tying it off, "I'll stitch it as soon as we find a place for the night,"

"I think they went this way!"

"Hurry up! After them!"

"Fuck…" Gajeel growled, tipping his head back to sniff the air, "Follow me,"

They went as fast as they could, Gajeel concealing their footsteps as Laxus stumbled through the pine trees. Every once in a while the voices got dangerously close, but Gajeel found ways to make a diversion whilst they found another track into the forest. After what seemed hours of wandering through the pines and dodging mages, Gajeel spotted a cave partway hidden by brambles that extended into the side of a large hill.

It was dark and cool but dry and Gajeel could easily see despite the sun setting. He led Laxus as far back as he dared, not sure as to where the cavern led. Laxus let out a pained hiss as he dropped to the floor, his breathing coming in tired gasps as he gritted his teeth against the pain and fatigue. Gajeel landed hard next to him, trying his best to hear into the forest. He hadn't sensed anyone tracking them for the past hour but it never hurt to be sure.

"Well, today's been eventful," Gajeel sighed, reaching into is pocket to pull out a handful of metal scraps.

"Eventful… more like a fucking pain…" Laxus panted, unbuttoning his shirt and discarding it next to him.

Gajeel bit back a retort as he ran his fingers over a piece of iron, his magic making it skinnier and skinnier, bending it in the middle and making it a pointed needle. Laxus watched him in silence, secretly thankful for the green light cast by his magic that allowed him to see.

"Seems like you've done this a few times," Laxus growled as he began to untie the rough bandage Gajeel had made.

"Just on myself," Gajeel grunted, popping a nail into his mouth as he worked, "I usually work alone so I had to learn."

"I take it most of those are your doing, then?" Laxus said, nodding to the scars on Gajeel's arm. Gajeel regarded them silently before raking his ruby eyes back up to Laxus.

"Lean back," Gajeel instructed, putting a rough hand on his shoulder. Laxus winced as he slowly leaned himself back. Gajeel's light dissipated leaving him in complete darkness. He could hear the sound of Gajeel's boots scraping against the cave floor and the metal studs on his jacket clinking together quietly before calloused fingertips smoothed across his skin.

"How in the hell can you see?" Laxus brought his hand up to pinch the bridge of his nose, taking in a tight breath as the needle pierced his skin.

"Dragon instincts," Gajeel murmured in the darkness, "your eyes aren't the only things you need to see,"

"What the hell's that s'posed to mean?"

"I can smell where the fresh blood is coming from. I can feel where the healthy skin stops. And I can see… barely,"

Laxus could feel Gajeel's breath on his chest as he worked. His hands were quick and masters at what they were doing. Laxus could only barely feel the prick of the needle and the tug of the thread when he tightened the stitches.

"I've always been able to see and hear things Evergreen or Freed or Bixlow couldn't, but not like that," Laxus said quietly as Gajeel finished.

"It has its pros and cons," Gajeel muttered, pushing himself to sit on the balls of his feet and stretching out his arms.

"Yeah? Like what?" Laxus's voice rumbled bitterly in the dark. Gajeel's hands were warm against his skin. His bleeding had made him feel almost light-headed. If it hadn't been for Gajeel's quick thinking the other mages probably would have tracked them to their hiding spot.

Gajeel's shuffling in the dark brought him out of his ever-darkening thoughts. He felt the Iron Mage's presence beside him, could feel the heat from his closeness and it startled him. His warm breath ghosted over Laxus's skin and he could feel the tug of the wire Gajeel had used to stitch the wound. He felt smooth, soft skin brushing by his flesh and he suddenly realized it was his lips.

"Oi… what are you doing?" Laxus jerked away from him only to feel a sharp pang from where Gajeel held the line.

"Calm the fuck down. I'm just cutting the wire," Gajeel's voice came from somewhere extremely close and it made Laxus uneasy to feel his personal space being invaded. He tensed when he felt a rough hand smooth across his midsection; a tug, and then the feel of Gajeel's warm breath grazing against his skin. Laxus felt gooseflesh begin to spread through him from the strangeness of it all. Gajeel, however, acted as if nothing was amiss and nonchalantly ran the thin metallic fiber across his canines, snipping it with his sharp teeth.

For some reason, Laxus felt like he'd been holding his breath.

"You can calm down now, fairy," Gajeel snickered in the darkness, getting to his feet and pacing deeper into the cavern.

"Oi, where the hell do you think you're going?" Laxus growled, brushing off the strange sensation that was still lingering on his skin from the Iron Mage's nearness.

"S'plorin'," Gajeel called back over his shoulder, "You ok to come with or are you just gonna sit there and lick yer wounds?"

"Dammit Redfox," Laxus huffed, pushing himself off the ground and wincing at the protest in his side. He could move a little better, though, and had little problem keeping up with Gajeel as they made their way deeper into the grotto, "If we run into trouble I'm in no condition to fight,"

"Gihi, guess that means you can't barge in like an idiot this time,"

"Do you ever shut the fuck up?" Laxus steamed, sending small charges of electricity into the air to help him see as he followed.

"Gihi,"


	5. Chapter 5

They crept through the dark tunnels, neither of them wanting to break the silence as they strained to hear into the cave. Several times the walls got so close they had to inch their way through, often causing Gajeel to help Laxus because of his injury. Laxus had to admit, the smaller mage had really aided him a lot since they'd started their mission together, although he was sure he would have been fine without him. Actually, if it hadn't been for Gajeel's insistence on being discreet he probably would have gotten to the bottom of the whole thing by now. But it was becoming clearer and clearer that although Gajeel was quite impatient, he enjoyed missions where he could get in and out without anyone noticing he was there until they found the damage he'd done.

He had to hand it to the Iron Mage, though. His skills had proved very useful.

"Alright Sparky," he heard his guarded voice from ahead, "No more light,"

"Don't call me Sparky," Laxus growled, but complied and stopped sending charges into the air. It took a moment for his eyes to adjust but he could clearly see that around the bend there was a faint light, "What's up ahead?"

"I'm not sure…" Gajeel seemed hesitant as they neared, like he didn't want to see what was around the corner, "But I smell blood and iron. This place… it's not good."

"Do you hear anyone?" Laxus pressed close to his side, towering over him slightly.

"Yes… but it doesn't seem threatening," Gajeel slowly began to ease around the bend. The crevice was small and Laxus wasn't quite sure if he'd fit through or not. The light was faint on the other side, enough so that they didn't have to worry about being seen as they slipped through to the other side. As soon as they made it through, Gajeel froze.

"Dear Mavis…" his voice was barely above a whisper, shaking as it left his lips.

"What is it?" Laxus wrinkled his nose as the smell of sweat and human waste filled his nose. He could barely make out the silvery shines of metal bars in the faint light but there was only darkness past them.

"The missing boys…"

Laxus followed him quietly as they passed cage after cage. Dark figures were hunched as far back from their entrances as possible. He could hear them crying as they passed, some of them cringing back in fear at their presence. Gajeel walked ahead shakily, not looking from side to side as he went. He seemed to be staring at something into the darkness and heading for it. All Laxus could do was follow quietly, not wanting to lose his way in the maze of cages.

"Where are you going?" Laxus whispered harshly into the metal-studded ear, "We need to get them out of here."

"I have to see something first," Gajeel growled back, walking up to a table that was situated towards the back of the giant room, "What they're here for."

"Does it matter? Look at the condition they're in," Laxus snarled.

"Human trafficking…" Gajeel mumbled, shifting through papers laying on the desk, "And… what's this?"

"The hell if I know," Laxus growled as Gajeel's red eyes shifted towards something else in the dark. He grabbed a handful of the papers and stuffed them into his pockets before walking off again. He walked stealthily in the darkness, a level of silence in his footsteps that Laxus couldn't imagine how long it took to perfect. He stalked around like a predator with his red eyes seeing masterfully into the darkness. Grudgingly, ignoring the voice telling him to start freeing the boys in the cages, he followed.

It took everything in him not to allow electrical charges to spark into the air in his agitation.

They came to another table, this one covered in potion bottles and research equipment. There were several utensils on and nearby, proving the lengths the researchers would go to test their results on their caged victims.

"Looks like we've found your burglars," Gajeel's voice sounded off, nervous and unsure. He was rummaging through papers again, his nose curling up as he read what was written on them in the near pitch black.

"What is it?" Laxus whispered as Gajeel hastily stuffed the papers into his pockets.

"We need to go get help," Gajeel growled, grabbing Laxus by the arm and pulling him back down the line of cages.

"Are you kidding me? We _are_ the help!" Laxus jerked away from him, "What's going on?"

"This is large scale human trafficking," Gajeel growled, his voice so silent Laxus almost couldn't hear, "And even worse, they're experimenting with-"

Suddenly, lights blared down on them from above and he felt Gajeel grab him by the arm and throw him down to the ground. There was a _whoosh_ sound and something wet and hot splattered across his chest and face. He heard Gajeel grunt and falter and Laxus felt pain lance through his side where his wound reopened.

"Well, found you at last," a woman's voice came from somewhere above and Laxus pushed himself up and squinted into the light to see the labcoat-clad figure with long black locks sitting atop one of the large cages. Gajeel was standing over him, Iron Scales activated and snarling loudly at the doctor they'd met just the day before. He was gripping his shoulder tensely and Laxus could see blood slipping down the iron shield.

"Surrender, Fairy Tail Mages," Laxus pushed himself up, wincing from the pain and sent a bloody glare at the mage from the woods that had injured him earlier. He could see him clearly now, short brown locks with hauntingly bright blue eyes. His skin was pale and there were thin scars laced across his forearms along with a few fresh lacerations on his face. Gajeel had definitely hit him with his roar.

"I would but I'm not in the mood," Gajeel sneered, not moving his eyes from the woman as she jumped from her perch to land gracefully just a few short meters away. She looked casual, not a hint of worry or frustration on her face as she made her way towards the two mages.

"You seem like two rather strong men," she cooed silkily as she approached, "We have ways of breaking that here,"

"I think you underestimate us," Gajeel smirked back, baring his fangs at her menacingly.

"I take it you two are Dragon Slayers? Never met any first hand before, although I'd always hoped to," she smiled.

Gajeel's arm transformed into a serrated blade and his smirk vanished, a much more threatening stance taking its place. The woman stopped her approach, her smile fading.

"Now, now, there's no need for violence here. You wouldn't want to upset the poor boys, would you? They're already terrified of you," she leaned against the bars gently, her look causing the teens in the cage to shrink away, "Besides, we have no reason to cause each other harm."

"A deal?" Laxus snuffed, "You expect us to walk out of here without alerting the Magic Council about this place?"

"There are only three ways you're leaving here today," the woman sighed as if the whole thing was just some taxing business meeting, "Either part of my guard, part of my business, or two more bodies we have to hide out here in the woods. Your choice,"

"We have people who'd come looking for us," Gajeel growled, inching back towards Laxus, his bloody eyes still on the woman.

"Everyone can be bought. And I do know a few people who do very well at forging handwriting," she crossed her arms, "Please, you don't think I'm new at this, do you?"

"I think whatever you are, you're sick and need to be taken down," Laxus growled, hiding the pain in his voice with the anger he felt.

"You don't look too well, dear," she gave him a calculating look, "With as much blood as you've lost today I'm surprised you haven't passed out. We do have healers here, that is, if you'll come quietly."

"Why don't you go fuck yourself," Gajeel growled, backing up another step. It was clear he was thinking about something and Laxus could tell he was trying to think up an escape route. The only problem was neither of them knew what the woman could do or what kind of threat she was. Laxus cursed himself for his weakness. If he hadn't lost so much blood, attacking and getting them all out would be a cinch. But he felt lightheaded and knew in his state he wouldn't be able to control his magic well. He could just as well fry himself and Gajeel as the other two mages if he attacked in his current state.

"Ceatus, if you wouldn't mind?" the woman waved over her shoulder dismissively.

"Of course, ma'am," the mage conjured a large attack, his magic circle spreading out around him as he summoned blades from thin air.

"Last chance, boys," she pulled a vile out from her pocket and swished the liquid inside of it dismissively, "Come quietly or die,"

"You have our answer," Laxus roared, lightning sparking from his body to ignite the air around them.

The mage fired, sending blades hurtling at them. Laxus dodged back and covered his face, bracing for the hit. Before it came, however, Gajeel blocked with his shield, cursing as the blades sought to pierce his skin.

"Go!" Gajeel roared, grabbing Laxus's arm and pulling him. Laxus gritted his teeth against the pain as he ran, letting Gajeel take the brunt of the attacks as they rushed for the exit. He could feel his flesh ripping with each step, the crude stitching not holding against the natural movement of his body as they fled. Something smashed against his side and shattered, sending glass shards to puncture the already painful flesh. He gasped and stumbled, only to have Gajeel haul him to his feet and force him back through the place they'd come from.

"Don't pursue, Ceatus,"

The mage halted, letting his magic calm as he turned to face his master. She tossed her black hair over her shoulder and turned back towards her workbench. Her fingers delicately went over the different bottles and she began mixing as if nothing had ever happened.

"May I ask a question, ma'am?" he said quietly, bowing his head respectfully when she looked up at him.

"Yes?"

"Why throw one of the potions, ma'am? Aren't they for your customers?"

"I guess your stupidity really can't be helped," she scolded him harshly, her eyes giving him a venomous look, "Dragon Slayers go into heat like their bestial counterparts. Male dragons are such violent creatures… no doubt he'll wake up tomorrow wondering why he's covered in his friend's blood."

"But… doesn't it have to be swallowed?"

"Any way of getting inside the body will work. Including the wound you gave him earlier,"

"Cunning as always, ma'am,"

"I wouldn't have to be if you did your job," she berated, raising her hand so that he flinched away. She stopped for a moment and looked down on him the way one might look at a dying rat that crawled out of the sewer, "Why don't you gather your idiot mages and get them to start cleaning up. Even if the red-eyed one doesn't survive, he took enough evidence that the Magic Council will be on us within the week."

"Right away, ma'am,"

"Such a shame," she sighed absent-mindedly, "They were such handsome young men, don't you think?"


	6. Chapter 6

**ADULT THEMES AND GRAPHIC SCENES AHEAD:**

 **THIS IS GOING TO BE AN EXTREMELY GRAPHIC FANFICTION. IT IS NOT INTENDED FOR IMMATURE AUDIENCES AND MAY CONTAIN TRIGGERS FOR SOME READERS. IT IS YOUR RESPONSIBILITY AS A READER TO KEEP THIS IN MIND FOR THE FUTURE. I WILL REPOST THIS DISCLAIMER AT THE BEGINNING OF EVERY CHAPTER WITH GRAPHIC CONTENT. I WILL DO MY BEST TO ENSURE THAT IF YOU SKIP THE CHAPTER THAT YOU WILL NOT LOSE ANY OF THE EXPERIENCE.**

 **PLEASE BE KIND AND CONSIDERATE WHEN READING. CRITIQUE IS ENCOURAGED BUT RUDENESS WILL NOT BE TOLERATED.**

 **THANK YOU FOR READING. I HOPE YOU ENJOY.**

Gajeel stumbled through the cave, pulling Laxus after him all the way. He knew he was in deep pain but wouldn't allow them to stop. If he had to fight the other mage _and_ act as a shield for Laxus there was no way he'd last. The mage, Ceatus was his name, had already proven that he would take an advantage if it was given and Laxus in his current state was just that.

"Red… fox…" Laxus panted, coming to a halt and falling to his knees, "I can't… can't…"

"Dammit…" Gajeel growled, looking behind them anxiously. He stayed in a tense silence for a moment, listening to see if they were being pursued. The only sound was that of Laxus panting, his breathing much more labored than when they had set out earlier. Gajeel could smell the blood filling the air and knelt down to help him sit back.

"I can't… run… anymore…" Laxus grunted as Gajeel leaned down to check on him, "She… threw something… at me…"

"She what?" Gajeel wrinkled up his nose, "Do you know what it was?"

"Something glass," he panted, his arms shaking as he tried to keep himself up. Gajeel quickly slid off Laxus's jacket and began unbuttoning his shirt. Laxus didn't object, just punched the ground as he winced from pain when Gajeel pulled the blood-soaked clothing away.

"Bitch got ya good," Gajeel growled, quickly finding the shards and pulling them out. His fingers were clumsy from fatigue and he tried to cause as little discomfort as possible as he worked.

"I feel strange…" Laxus huffed, his breaths beginning to hitch again, "Lightheaded…"

"Can you lean forward?" Gajeel grunted, putting a hand to his back and helping him up, "You've lost a lot of blood. You probably need to eat and rest…"

"Not that… hot…" Laxus's hands were shaking; his skin felt like it was crawling. He was panting and couldn't calm his breathing. His heart wouldn't slow, just kept hammering at an alarming pace, "Why is it so hot?"

"Calm down," Gajeel tried to keep his voice calm despite his worry. He'd never seen Laxus like this before. Had he really lost that much blood? Or was it because of whatever that bitch had thrown at him? But most potions had to be swallowed to take effect… unless this was specifically designed differently. And with her trade, that probably wouldn't be too surprising if it was…

Gajeel froze as a scent started to mix with Laxus's natural smell. His pheromones were changing drastically, turning muskier and aggressive. He was panting harder, his canines starting to extend and quick shocks of electricity were zigzagging through the air to snap at Gajeel's metallic skin.

"What's going on… with me…?" Laxus groaned, his eyes sparking yellow as his anger started to grow, "What is this?!"

"Laxus, calm down…" Gajeel said coolly, trying to act as if nothing was wrong, "I need to stitch your wound again…"

"Don't touch me!" Laxus punched him in the chest hard, making him fall backwards.

"Laxus, you need to calm down…"

"Like hell I can do that!" he roared, pushing himself up and stumbling to the side, "What's wrong with me?!"

"You just need some fresh air," Gajeel huffed, not moving from his spot on the ground, "That's all. You're going to be fine…"

"You know what's going on, don't you?" Laxus regarded him harshly, fury making lightning spark even harder around him, "Tell me!"

"Laxus, I don't-"

Laxus grabbed him by the collar and flung him against the wall his fingers constricting harshly around his throat. Gajeel gripped his wrists as tightly as he could, doing his best to keep from being throttled by the raging Thunder Dragon. Laxus's face was close, electricity making Gajeel's body flinch as each bolt made his muscles contort involuntarily. He gritted his teeth to keep from calling out.

"What's wrong with me?" Laxus's growl shook his ribs as he spoke.

"You're going into heat…" Gajeel choked out.

"You know I can't," Laxus sent volts into the Iron Slayer's body, making him grunt as he tried not to scream from the pain, "I'm not a _real_ Slayer, remember?"

"Laxus, I can't-"

Laxus sent more electricity into him. He wouldn't call out, only gritted his teeth and arched his back in pain. It enraged him. Why wouldn't he tell him what was going on? Obviously he knew. Why was Laxus the only one who felt like this? This was all Gajeel's fault. If he hadn't insisted on exploring the caves they would have never been caught. He should have just attacked back in the forest when he'd first heard that psycho bitch's voice. What did Gajeel even know about this shit? Laxus was the S-class mage here, not him. He shouldn't have ever listened to the dumb brute in the first place. This was all Gajeel's fault.

"Laxus stop!" Gajeel screamed, his voice choking in his throat as another blast of lightning hit him. Laxus only growled in reply, his mind lost in the heat. Gajeel screamed as another volt had his body warping from the pain. He could barely breathe with Laxus's choking hold around his throat and each hit sucked the little breath he had out of his lungs. Finally, Laxus threw him to the other wall of the cave and Gajeel cracked his head against the stone. He felt dizzy, his body still wracked with pain as the residual effect of the lightning attacks made his muscles shake and his heart beat irregularly.

He had barely lifted himself up when Laxus kicked him in the face, whipping his head back to hit the stone wall again. He felt dizzy and something hot and sticky was trickling down his face. His vision was blurry, his strength failing. Another attack had him screaming again, his body bending into unnatural positions as it sought release from the pain.

"Laxus…" he groaned out, "Stop…"

He felt himself being lifted up from the ground again, strong hands gripping his throat. He couldn't breathe, his windpipe was being crushed. He held onto Laxus's arms weakly, his lungs screeching for the air they couldn't claim. He had to think, get Laxus to stop before he was killed.

With as much strength as he could muster, Gajeel kicked him in his wounded side. He fell hard to the ground, gasping for breath as Laxus staggered and fell backwards roaring from the pain his wound was enduring. Gajeel pulled himself to his hands and knees, still coughing and gasping as he tried feebly to crawl away. A hand gripped his ankle and pulled him back. Laxus was over him, hands aimed for his neck again and Gajeel tried to keep them away. Blood was making it hard for him to see and he didn't know if he could endure another attack before he blacked out.

"Laxus…" he panted, his voice hoarse from the abuse to his throat, "Snap out of it…"

Blinding yellow consumed him, had him screaming from the pain he didn't think he could take any longer. From the bottom of his heart, he thought he was going to die. His mind couldn't think of a way to get out. His body was at its limit. His iron shield couldn't protect him against the lightning attacks but only magnify the pain.

He was actually going to die.

Laxus was panting over his bloody and broken form. There was a look of finality in his eyes as he charged his next attack. Gajeel just gazed at him, feverish from the pain and unable to fight him any longer.

He was going to die, killed by a friend no less. Why was this so ironic?

Maybe it was Gajeel being delirious or just his brain's last attempt at finding a way to live, but an idea started to unfold in his mind. He arched his back, closing his eyes as he ground his hips against the figure above him. Instead of releasing another attack, Laxus gasped. The furious yellow sparks in is eyes vanished and he dropped his head. Gajeel froze.

"What the…" Laxus was breathless, lost in his instinctive desires. Gajeel leaned his head back, closing his eyes as Laxus's pheromones changed again. His aggression was dissipating and being replaced with something else, something much more primal.

"Shit…" Gajeel turned his head away from the Lightning Slayer's face when he felt him grinding against him. Something very akin to fear bunched up in his stomach. What was he supposed to do now?

"What the hell do you think you're doing…?" Laxus's voice was deep but weak, his yellow eyes glittering with a totally different rage than he had before as Gajeel pressed his thumbs into the blonde's hips, his cheeks flaring with red heat of a totally different kind.

But Laxus's hands had gone slack. His arms on either side of the raven-haired mage's face. Gajeel could hear his knuckles creaking as he balled his fingers into tight fists. Gajeel's heart was hammering erratically. He couldn't believe what he was doing as he slowly glided calloused hands up porcelain abs, gaining a shuttering gasp from the Lightning Dragon above him.

"Don't fucking… touch me… like that…" he growled, though the anger from before had all but completely subsided. Laxus's mind was getting fuzzier and fuzzier, like he was just watching this happen to someone else. This wasn't really his pulse that was filling with fire, it wasn't really Gajeel's touch that was sending gooseflesh running across his skin like it was going to eat him alive. He was gazing down into swimming red eyes; eyes that were filled to the brim with so many things. He could see pain, fear, and shame surfacing as his thumbs hooked to Laxus's pockets, barely shimmying his waistline enough that his member had to resist against it.

Laxus's veins were filling with a new aggression, a new need that was quickly claiming the few remaining sane thoughts he still had. He squeezed his eyelids closed against it, against the muscles that were telling him to collapse on the man under him, against the urges that were screaming for him to commit an entirely different set of atrocities on the barely functioning body shivering so close to him. He heard Gajeel swallow hard, felt his heat getting so much closer. It wasn't until Laxus opened his eyes did he realize he'd leaned down so close to the tanned face underneath him. Gajeel's head was turned to the side, eyes glaring at something in the darkness surrounding them. Despite the clear stiff discomfort he could feel in the scarred man, he couldn't bring himself to pull away. He should have been appalled, stumbling away from the compromising position they were in, but he couldn't. He found himself staring at the sweat gleaming off of his neck, the artery pulsing so quickly it made the muscle beneath tanned skin jump.

Laxus's eyes were already glazing over with lust, a look that chilled Gajeel's veins. Laxus lowered his head again, this time planting kisses down the Iron Mage's neck. He couldn't believe this was happening, but then, what did he expect? Whatever it was, it wasn't that Laxus would suddenly go from wanting to kill him to wanting to mate with him. Gajeel swallowed hard when he felt Laxus's fangs pushing harshly against the skin of his throat.

"Laxus…!" Gajeel pushed his face away, gaining a curious and agitated look from the Lightning Mage, "D-Don't…"

Laxus brought his hand up to Gajeel's chin, a feather light touch compared to the brutal attacks from earlier. His lips were pressing against Gajeel's collar, travelling up to his jaw and stopping at his pierced ear. His tongue was hot and it pressed hungrily against Gajeel's skin, causing a chill to run through him. He was beginning to get impatient, trying to push Gajeel's hands down so he couldn't fight back.

Gajeel swallowed hard, so many different emotions running through him he didn't know what to do. He couldn't let this continue or else Laxus might actually try to have sex with him, but if he made him angry again he might not be alive to be mortified by the entire event tomorrow. He didn't want to die especially when his pride was the only thing that was going to mean the difference between life and death. But he couldn't help the degradation that was making it hard to swallow as Laxus's kisses made their way down to the base of his collar, his teeth once again threatening to break his skin.

He pressed his hips against Laxus's again, causing the man to let out a low moan. Reluctantly, shakily, Gajeel moved his hand down to the growing erection in Laxus's pants and pressed against it. Laxus gasped, a light blush beginning to tinge his cheeks.

"I ain't gonna fuck ya," Gajeel said quietly, seemingly more to himself than Laxus, "I'm just gonna calm you down."


	7. Chapter 7

**ADULT THEMES AND GRAPHIC SCENES AHEAD:**

 **THIS IS GOING TO BE AN EXTREMELY GRAPHIC FANFICTION. IT IS NOT INTENDED FOR IMMATURE AUDIENCES AND MAY CONTAIN TRIGGERS FOR SOME READERS. IT IS YOUR RESPONSIBILITY AS A READER TO KEEP THIS IN MIND FOR THE FUTURE. I WILL REPOST THIS DISCLAIMER AT THE BEGINNING OF EVERY CHAPTER WITH GRAPHIC CONTENT. I WILL DO MY BEST TO ENSURE THAT IF YOU SKIP THE CHAPTER THAT YOU WILL NOT LOSE ANY OF THE EXPERIENCE.**

 **PLEASE BE KIND AND CONSIDERATE WHEN READING. CRITIQUE IS ENCOURAGED BUT RUDENESS WILL NOT BE TOLERATED.**

 **THANK YOU FOR READING. I HOPE YOU ENJOY.**

His hands fumbled with the button of Laxus's jeans before releasing the member into his grasp. Just the touch made Laxus let out a lusty growl. He leaned back onto his heels, his yellow eyes looking down at Gajeel hungrily, causing a strange feeling to twist in Gajeel's stomach as he started moving his hand up and down his shaft. Laxus tipped his head backwards, groaning and moving his hips with Gajeel's movements. Without warning, he gripped onto the collar of Gajeel's jacket and pulled him up onto his knees. Gajeel yelped in surprise as Laxus pressed his lips lustily against his, forcing his tongue into the Iron Mage's mouth and sighing into it.

Gajeel gripped his arms, trying to fight the urge to push him away. Laxus was letting his hands fall to Gajeel's hips, gripping harshly to his thighs and rubbing his thumbs close to his inner legs. Gajeel tried to be submissive to his probing kisses; tried not to do anything or either enrage or encourage him. Laxus, it seemed, didn't need any encouragement. He was breathless when he pulled back from the kiss but continued frantically, running his tongue over the shell of Gajeel's ear and taking a hand to open up his studded jacket and push it off his shoulders.

"Laxus, don't…" Gajeel tried to pull his jacket back up and Laxus took the opportunity to let his lips trail down his neck once again, "L-Laxus! Stop!" Gajeel pushed him back again, earning an angry growl from the Lightning Mage, "Don't. Bite. Me."

Laxus narrowed his eyes at him and grabbed a fistful of Gajeel's hair. Gajeel struggled against him but Laxus gripped onto his wrist and forced him down against the ground. Gajeel didn't have the strength to fight against him as he grabbed his other wrist and forced them above his head. Gajeel's back arched involuntarily, causing him to grind his hips against Laxus's erection. Laxus moaned and leaned down, taking Gajeel's lips once again as he pushed against his waist. Gajeel gasped when Laxus pulled back, gritting his teeth at his harshness.

"Laxus! Seriously, stop!" Gajeel huffed when he forced his lips against his neck, "Don't!"

He felt his fangs puncture his skin and almost immediately a tingling sensation spread through his veins. He arched, his whole body quickly becoming sensitive to every touch Laxus gave him. As Laxus ground against him, he couldn't help the moans that escaped his lips and he found himself pressing against Laxus's hungry thrusts. When their lips met he actually kissed him back, their tongues fighting for dominance with each other.

Laxus moaned into his mouth, sending a shiver down his spine. Gajeel's body was responding readily despite the protest in his mind. When Laxus pulled away he was breathless and he couldn't object when he felt his jacket falling off him. Laxus's mouth was trailing down his chest, his tongue brushing against the pink bud that was much more sensitive than Gajeel thought it would be. He laced his fingers through his golden locks, leaning his head back and moaning at the pleasure he was feeling.

Laxus's fingers had made it to Gajeel's pants, quickly pulling them down and taking out his hard member. Gajeel arched his back, his eyes wide as his body reacted to the amazing feelings rushing from his groin and nipple. He couldn't believe everything that was happening, his breathing was rugged gasps. Laxus gripped his chin again and pulled him to his knees for another rough kiss, their lips bruising each other from the harshness. Gajeel's hands slid down Laxus's stomach and he kissed down his chest, nipping his skin as he went down making Laxus growl blissfully. When Gajeel made it to his wound he let his tongue snake out to run across it, hearing a hiss from Laxus although he didn't stop him.

Gajeel's hand gripped Laxus's member as he kept running his tongue across the angry laceration, tasting the iron bite from the blood on the tip of his tongue. To his surprise, Gajeel felt Laxus's fingers intertwine with his long mane as he made his way down. His mouth found Laxus's member and he ran his tongue up it, feeling the way his legs tensed when he did so. Laxus groaned as he ran his tongue up the sensitive vein on the underside of his dick; his body shook with each masterful stoke. Gajeel made his way to the tip, already weeping with arousal and anticipation from Gajeel's tongue. He took it readily, sliding his mouth down slowly as he swallowed down Laxus.

Laxus was shaking with ecstasy, relishing the feeling of Gajeel's hot mouth around him. He gripped his tresses harshly, squeezing his eyes shut as Gajeel pumped his head up and down his shaft. His mind was swimming as Gajeel worked him and he was breathless after only a few short minutes. He was so ready to come but didn't want to do it in Gajeel's mouth. When he was just about to blow he pulled Gajeel's head up to meet his mouth and consumed him with a hungry kiss, his hands trembling with desire as he held onto his shoulders.

He brought Gajeel up and pushed him against the wall, letting his pants drop to his ankles. He kissed him passionately, letting Gajeel's tongue wander through his mouth as his hand made its way down to grip his member. He worked Gajeel until his red eyes were glazed over and he was moaning from the need to release. He brought his free hand up to Gajeel's mouth and pushed them past his lips. Gajeel sucked on them gently, closing his eyes as Laxus ran his tongue up his chest to his collar. Suddenly, Laxus turned him around and pushed a finger into his opening, causing Gajeel to gasp and dig his nails into the wall.

"Laxus!" he gasped as Laxus splayed his over hand on his lower back, digging the tips of his fingers into his flesh, "Wait…"

Gajeel's stomach turned nervously as Laxus pushed another finger into him. He gritted his teeth from the pain, the nervous tension that had been drowned out by the sensitive pleasure wracking his body slowly coming back to surface. Laxus leaned close to him, kissing and licking his shoulder as he scissored his fingers. Gajeel's limbs were shaking as he leaned against the wall, his muscles still weak from the attacks he'd sustained from Laxus earlier. He wasn't sure if he could take what Laxus was about to force onto him.

His stomach churned dangerously when he felt Laxus pushing something larger than his fingers up against his opening. He bit into his knuckle as he entered, his eyes watering from the pain of being stretched out. He tried to keep from shouting out when Laxus began to move far too soon. He pressed his forehead against his fist, shutting his eyes against the ache.

"L-Laxus…" he growled through gritted teeth, "Stop… I can't…"

His legs were shaking and weak and he couldn't hold Laxus's weight. Laxus forced him against the wall, not allowing him a route to escape. He was still lost in the heat, taking what he wanted greedily and not caring about the figure quivering with fatigue and pain beneath him. He thrusted harder into Gajeel, hitting the bundle of nerves deep inside of him and making him moan despite it all. But with each thrust Gajeel was finding it harder and harder to stand and finally his legs buckled beneath him and he and Laxus fell to the ground. Laxus just growled angrily at the loss of momentum and pulled Gajeel to his knees.

"Laxus, please…" Gajeel gasped, tears stinging his eyes again as Laxus forced himself back inside.

He was thrusting hard and deep, hitting Gajeel's g-spot and making him shake in pleasure beneath him. He wrapped his hand around to grab onto his semi-hard member, quickly reawakening the passion there and pumping it with his thrusts. Gajeel panted into the crook of his arm, torn between ecstasy and agony as he continued, knowing all too well his protests were lost on Laxus.

Laxus was becoming more frantic, the pleasure of being inside of Gajeel quickly becoming too much for him to bear and he rocketed towards climax. Gajeel could feel his own building as well and gritted his teeth as each wave of pleasure sent him closer and closer to the edge. Suddenly, he felt warmth and pressure fill him and the next thrust hit his g-spot with so much force that he tumbled over the edge as Laxus collapsed over him, his arms on either side of him as his cum splattered all over the floor.

Gajeel's arms collapsed from the exhaustion that was so intense he almost passed out right then. Laxus pulled out of him slowly, his body still sensitive from their fuck, and he crawled a few feet away and collapsed, pulling his jacket up over him. Gajeel knew he should check on him, make sure his wound wasn't bleeding but his whole body was weak and shaking. He too, limped weakly to where his jacket had been discarded and collapsed, pulling his pants up and fastening them before shivering underneath his coat.

His head was throbbing and his limbs protested every movement. He felt like something inside of him had been torn and his whole body was covered in burns and cuts from Laxus's relentless attacks. For a few moments before unconsciousness took him, he wondered if he would wake up again.


	8. Chapter 8

"I can't remember,"

Laxus felt like he'd been saying those words all day. He'd awoken to find Gajeel passed out on the ground of the cave covered in extensive injuries that he didn't remember him having before. What he could remember wasn't much. He remembered being attacked and fleeing into the cavern. He remembered telling Gajeel he couldn't go on any longer, but after that everything was blank. He had tried and tried to remember but couldn't conjure a thing. The most helpful thing he'd done all day was tell the Magic Council member what they had found in the cave and hand over the evidence Gajeel had insisted on stuffing into his pockets. The officer had paled and a grim set had fallen to his features. He'd then thanked him profusely for their find and hurried off.

When he'd finally gotten word to Mirajane, Gramps had hurried to the scene. And for the millionth time he'd been asked the question he didn't have the answer to: What happened to Gajeel?

"You can't remember anything?" Makarov's white brows furrowed in worry, "Why? Did something happen?"

"The woman in the cave, the one who heads the whole thing, threw something at me. It made me feel lightheaded and I couldn't follow him any more. I must have passed out."

Makarov cast his eyes to Gajeel, a worried expression on his face, "I know you two haven't been on the best of terms, Laxus. I want you to be honest with me, did you do this?"

Laxus froze and gazed at the unconscious Iron Mage. The wounds were consistent with a hard fight and the type of damage that had been done was eerily similar to when they'd fought in the church. Laxus frowned, his hands balling into fists as he stared at the unmoving figure.

"I don't know," Laxus said at last, "But I don't have any injuries from it."

"That's true," Makarov murmured, "Maybe you were attacked after you'd lost consciousness and he was able to fight them off?"

"We won't know until he wakes up," Laxus said sullenly, looking down at his hands.

"Master Makarov?" a figure stood in the doorway. He was wearing a white cloak and the emblem of the Magic Council was on his uniform, "May I have a word?"

"Of course," Makarov smiled and hopped off his seat, "I'll be right back,"

Laxus nodded and watched him leave, letting out a sigh as the door shut. He turned his head to Gajeel and watched him steadily. If it weren't for his rugged breathing he could have been dead. Nothing on him moved, not even his eyes under their lids. Laxus had honestly thought he'd die before he got him to the hospital. When he'd awoken he'd seen a puddle of blood around his head from a deep scratch on his forehead. It hadn't been until he noticed his faint shivering that he'd even realized he was actually alive. It had taken some work with his still injured side to get the Iron Mage onto his back, but he'd somehow managed to carry him back to the nearest town and seek help.

Beaten within an inch of his life and on the verge of never waking up again. He was sure Gajeel would be in a mood when he finally woke up. He'd probably go running after whoever had done this and try to kill them. Actually, seeing Gajeel back to his old self would be a relief. How weak he looked now chilled Laxus's blood. He didn't realize it before, but he really considered Gajeel a strong comrade to have.

Laxus suddenly shuddered as a headache ripped through his skull. He staggered backwards, gripping his head from the sudden pain. He gasped, digging his nails into his skull. His ears started ringing harshly and he shut his eyes against the unbearable pain.

Suddenly, voices began to make their way through the door to his ears.

"…your son has done a great service. We've been trying to track these people for years. They've been kidnapping young teens from all over Fiore to put in human trafficking."

"I had no idea they had grown so much over the years."

"It really is tragic. That is why we need to know as much information as possible about what transpired. Are you sure he didn't tell you anything else?"

"No. He claims to have no recollection of what happened after Gajeel got them to safety."

"If you would, please, get a hold of us should he wake up. What he may know could help us greatly."

"I will do my best although the doctors haven't given us a date for when he might recover."

Silence.

"If you don't mind me asking, why aren't you out shutting down the faction in the woods?"

"We found the place described but when we got there nothing was there. We found traces of activity but unfortunately it seems your mages caused a big enough raucous that they left,"

"How disconcerting,"

"Thank you for your time, Master Makarov,"

"Yes, of course."

He heard the footsteps of the soldier as he went down the hall and the sound of Gramps letting out a tired sigh as he stood in the hall.

"Stop…"

Laxus started, his eyes widening as he looked down at Gajeel. His lips barely moved but Laxus could make out a hitch in his breathing every once in a while. It was almost as if he was trying to speak…

"Don't…"

Laxus's eyes widened and he hit the call button for the nurse on duty. It beeped quietly as it sent a summons to whoever was available. Laxus leaned over the bed and put a hand on Gajeel's shoulder, shaking it just barely.

"Oi, Gajeel?" he could suddenly smell blood, the smell like iron tracing the inside of his nose. He reeled back. Since when had he been able to smell blood? Or hear a conversation from down the hall?

"Master Makarov, did you call for something?" a polite female voice chimed.

"Hm? No, why do you ask?"

"Someone hit the call button for this room."

"The hell?" Laxus breathed as he watched the door, listening to the footsteps of the two as they hurried for the room. He heard Gajeel gasp and turned his head just as his eyes opened. They looked frantic for just a moment before he jerked up.

"Hey, hey, calm down," Laxus put a hand on his shoulder.

He cringed away, his eyes wide with horror for just a moment as they focused on him. Laxus took a step back, his brow furrowing as he watched Gajeel assess the situation and slowly bring down the hand that had instinctively come up to protect him. Suddenly, he whipped his head towards the door just as the knob jiggled and Makarov and the nurse came in.

"Gajeel, my lad, you're awake," Makarov smiled at him. The nurse looked shocked for a moment and then hurriedly came to his side.

"Do you need anything, Mr. Redfox? Some water?"

He opened his mouth as if to speak and then shut it again, closing his eyes and running his hand down his face. The three of them watched him anxiously as his shoulders slumped and he took in a shuddering breath, composing himself. Laxus felt for sure he could smell tears for a moment before Gajeel lowered his hand and regarded the nurse.

"Water…" his voice was nothing more than a horse whisper and the nurse hurried to the sink.

"Please don't stress your voice too much, Mr. Redfox," she smiled as she handed him the glass, "You've sustained some pretty severe injuries, some of them on your neck as well. Talking too much may cause permanent damage to…"

"I'm fine," he snapped at her, making her look at him in shock and then fall silent.

"Well, be sure to call me if you need anything. The doctor should be back later on today to run a couple more tests…"

"I told ya, I'm fine," he growled, giving her a vicious glare, "I don't need a damn doctor,"

"But sir…"

"My dear, why don't you go take a break," Makarov interjected, "I'm sure he's just tired. When did you say the doctor would be back?"

The two went out to the hallway, but not before Makarov shot the two of them an anxious look. A tense silence fell between them where Gajeel stared straight ahead and Laxus studied him uneasily. It was clear he was in pain, so why refuse a doctor? Again the smell of blood made Laxus wrinkle his nose.

"You're badly injured," Laxus said quietly, "Why not talk to the doctor?"

"Because I don't want to explain…" he started but stopped, running his fingers through his tangled mane.

"Explain what?"

Gajeel regarded him coolly for a moment, his red eyes swimming with suspicion, "You don't remember?"

"The last thing I remember is telling you I couldn't run anymore," Laxus pushed his hands into his pockets, "After that its all black,"

"Of course," Gajeel looked slightly relieved and shut his eyes.

"What happened, Redfox?"

"An excellent question, actually," Makarov stalked into the room, "Something that merits you being cruel to that poor girl, I'm sure?"

Gajeel was silent for a moment as if he were gathering his thoughts, "Do you remember when that woman threw a glass vial at you?"

"Yes,"

"Apparently it contained a potion that could be absorbed through a wound," he looked out of the corner of his eye at Laxus's side, now bandaged and mostly healed by the hospital's magical healers, "And it caused the person who absorbed it to become delusional. You thought I was an enemy bent on taking your life,"

"Is that so?" Makarov said slowly, looking from Laxus to Gajeel, "Then you really should have a session with their healers. Electrical attacks can have side effects even after a fight is over. I know Natsu had heart palpitations for a few days after your fight before the parade. You should really let the doctor examine you,"

"I'm fine," Gajeel stated firmly, "Dragon Slayers heal faster than most people. I don't need a healer to help me."

"If you insist," Makarov said at length, "Well now that we know what happened I'll be sure to tell the Magic Council. Be careful on your way back home, lads,"

"Aye," Gajeel said and watched Makarov leave. After the door shut and they listened to his footsteps retreat down the hall Laxus turned towards Gajeel and crossed his arms.

"You lied," Laxus snarled, "Why?"

"How the hell would you know, Sparky?" he growled in return, throwing the blankets off of himself and wincing as he heaved his feet over the edge of the bed.

"I…" Laxus stopped and looked down at his feet. How _did_ he know?

"Maybe your dragon instincts are finally kicking in," Gajeel sighed and let his feet down lightly onto the floor, "Fucking perfect,"

"Why do you say that?" Laxus growled.

"Because I ain't gonna be the one to teach you how to use 'em," Gajeel winced as he took a step and steadied himself on a medical table. He eyed his clothes that were sitting across the room and gritted his teeth. Laxus silently watched him struggle across the room, his face contorting in pain every time he took a step.

"You're tracking blood across the floor," Laxus said calmly.

"You think I don't know that?!" Gajeel barked at him, steadying himself on the table that held his clothes, "I think I liked it better when you kept the fuck to yourself!"

"Why won't you tell me the truth, Redfox?"

Gajeel was silent for a moment, turning his head to look at the ground. The look on his face was a mix of disgust, fatigue, and anger and it startled to Laxus to see it. Gajeel wasn't one to regret things he did and for the most part he didn't care what happened to himself so long as the job gets done.

"Was it that bad?" Laxus pressed, disturbed by the emotions flashing across Gajeel's face.

"Why don't you get the hell out so I can change? Unless you want to watch like some fucking pervert?"

Laxus left quietly but not before sending him a look before shutting the door. He would find out… somehow.


	9. Chapter 9

"Shit…" Laxus sat in the furthest, darkest corner of the guild as he could, setting his head down gently on his arms and closing his eyes. He felt like his brain was going to split or maybe he'd just rip it in half himself. Ever since he'd begun hearing better in the hospital his senses kept climbing to new and almost painful heights. Every noise was magnified so loud he couldn't think anymore. He could hear Lucy whispering to Levy about her novel and the sounds of glasses clinking together as Mirajane handed out beer at the bar. Footsteps upstairs seemed to be pounding against the roof overhead, almost making him jump every time they resumed.

And that wasn't all. His senses of smell and sight had significantly changed as well. The scent of booze stung his nose even when walking up to the guild. Perfume from the various women in the hall made his head swim uncomfortably. He could almost taste the acidic scents on his tongue. The midday sun almost burned through his corneas now. Every light was blaring and harsh, consuming his actions in harsh white that he desperately wanted to block out. Even light cast by his own magic had him squinting his eyes and avoiding its use. Most of his days had been spent in his room in complete darkness, coming out only after the sun had set and its rays were gentler.

It was only after some worried pleas from Gramps that he even came to the guild today. Freed and Bixlow greeted him with rowdy hellos and Freed quickly ushered him away once he'd realized something was wrong. All the Lightning Slayer wanted was to be left alone, was that too goddamn much to ask? But like always, Natsu had swept in, all fiery determination and idiocy, and challenged him to a fight. Of course he'd promptly sent Natsu flying across the hall and preceded to pick the most secluded spot he could.

And here he was, trying his best to seem like himself although a migraine was ripping its way through his skull. If one more idiot came hauling through that door he thought he might just send the whole place flying.

Just then, he heard heavy steps near the front door and the sound of hinges groaning as the heavy cedar was pulled open. He turned his head, hoping it wasn't Cana to blather away at him drunkenly as she usually did when he was at the guild. Instead, his eyes fell on the dark figure of Gajeel as he made his way petulantly inside. Pantherlily flew at his shoulder, arms crossed with a concerned look set across his features. Laxus almost immediately caught the scent of stale blood as Gajeel passed him, a slight limp in his gait that he was trying to hide by pausing to run a gloved hand through his black locks. It had only been a few days since he'd pushed his way past the nurses and refused any further medical help.

"Why don't you let Wendy help you?" Pantherlily growled lowly, keeping the conversation between just the two of them. Laxus turned his head although he was listening in on the conversation. It wasn't like he especially wanted to, more he wouldn't have been able to help it if he tried anyway. Another side effect he'd been having lately.

"Because I don't need no help," Gajeel's voice sounded tired and strained and he seemed to almost fall haphazardly into his chair, wincing slightly from the action. Laxus could hear him gripping the wooden arms, the wood creaking wearily under the force.

"You've never refused her before," Lily clicked his tongue, landing lightly on the table, "Why now?"

"Builds character," he grunted sarcastically, leaning forward to rest his chin on his hand.

"Your stupidity is going to be the end of you," Lily huffed.

"Why don't you make yerself useful and get me something to drink?" Gajeel growled, his red eyes cutting into the Exceed angrily. He paid no mind to the dark look, only took Gajeel's money with an offhanded comment about making him get it himself and flying over to Mirajane.

Suddenly, a loud crash sounded from across the hall, making Laxus physically cringe at the cacophony that ensued. Natsu and Grey started yelling at each other, getting Titania involved and soon the whole guild was broken out into a raucous fight like usual. Every slam of a table, broken glass, punch, scream, seemed to pound a nail into Laxus's skull. He dug his nails into his arms and clenched his teeth, desperately trying to keep from ripping his hair out. The noises and smells were overwhelming, crashing around in his brain and slowly making him feel like he was going to go mad.

A bottle shattered on the floor next to his feet, splattering beer across his shoes and pant-leg but he didn't even have it in him to lash out at whoever had thrown it. He was concentrating on keeping it together, on not running out of the boisterous hall and diving into the largest, darkest hole in existence. He was going to go insane. He could feel it, every ounce of restraint in his body slipping. He was drowning in the noise, in the foul smells that permeated the air, the blinding light of the world around him that all seemed so completely normal until that damn mission. He was going to lose it…

He was going to…

"Oi, Sparky,"

Laxus jumped for the second time that day and whipped his head around to meet Gajeel's bloody red eyes. Laxus frowned, watching as tendrils of electricity snapped and popped as he meticulously deactivated his magic. He hadn't even realized he'd been exerting any energy, and by the scorch marks left on the table, he'd used quite a bit. Gajeel looked down at him coolly for a moment as if he were deciding something before clicking his teeth and leaning back to cross his arms.

"Come on," he growled angrily, stepping past him and making for the door just as the violence in the room began to swell again. Laxus rose and followed wordlessly, not missing the anxious glances being shot his way by Pantherlily and Levy as he passed.

He followed Gajeel outside and down a small path into the nearby strip of forest. They walked in complete silence, neither of them saying a word as they made their way to Mavis-knew-where. Despite not knowing what was going on, Laxus couldn't find it in him to get angry. Wherever they were going, it was far from the harsh sounds and smells of civilization. The sun's light was speckled across the ground through the protective branches of the trees. Out here, Laxus felt like he could finally get some peace.

Finally, Gajeel stopped in a small clearing, crossed his arms and took a long breath. He turned slightly and looked at Laxus over his shoulder, his red eyes swimming with the midday's light.

"Mind telling me what the hell we're doing out here?" Laxus said calmly, crossing his arms.

"This is where I go when I need some quiet," Gajeel said after a long pause, "And we're out here to spar,"

"Spar?" Laxus scoffed, "You can barely move,"

Gajeel let out a low growl, "If you think this is the first time I've gotten my ass beat you'd be mistaken. What do you think I did before Wendy started coming around?"

"Fine, but don't think I'll take it easy," Laxus challenged, letting his jacket fall to the ground, "Any rules?"

"No magic," Gajeel rolled his shoulders, grabbed a roll of tape out of his pocket, and threw his jacket over a low hanging branch.

"No magic?" Laxus said quietly, noticing the fresh scratches fighting to heal on Gajeel's back. The muscles on his back moved abnormally, shakily, clearly still weak and sore from the beating he'd taken when Laxus had lost it. He felt a pang of guilt begin to form in his stomach. How badly had he been injured, exactly?

"Got a problem with that, Sparky?" Gajeel huffed, throwing the tape over to him and stretching out the tenderness in his muscles while he waited.

"Don't fucking call me Sparky," Laxus growled, taking a ready stance.

A grin slowly made its way across Gajeel's face, "Whatever you say… Sparky,"

"Pain in the ass," Laxus lunged forward, aiming a strong punch to his gut. Gajeel dodged, his movement stiff but not slow enough to cause him injury. He was swift on his feet, an advantage against the larger mage.

Laxus hadn't fought with bare fists in years. He'd always used his incredible power to take down enemies. He'd never had to be methodical in his thinking, never had to plan out punches and blocks and parries. His strength had always been what won him fights. Gajeel, however, had been thoroughly trained in hand-to-hand and magical styles of fighting. His red eyes were calculating as he gaged Laxus's hits and the times it took for him to recover. He had been a master killer and S-Class mage in Phantom Lord and it showed.

Laxus continued his assault, hitting Gajeel's forearm hard enough to make him stagger slightly. While throwing his next hit, though, Gajeel dropped down and spun on his heel. His other leg slipped behind Laxus's ankles and swiped his feet out from under him, sending him crashing to the ground. Gajeel was over him in an instant, stopping his elbow just inches from Laxus's throat.

"Point," Gajeel huffed, sweat beginning to make his raven hair cling to the sides of his neck, "you're not paying attention."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Laxus panted, sitting up and pushing him over, "You're my only opponent."

Gajeel rolled his eyes and struggled back to his feet, extending a hand to the Lightning mage, "Again,"

"You're going to hurt yourself, dumbass," Laxus stood up without accepting the help, stepping back and widening his stance, "Again."


	10. Chapter 10

Gajeel didn't ready himself this time, but instead closed his eyes and inhaled slowly. When he opened his eyes again they seemed strange. It looked like he was remembering something.

"Look at me," Gajeel said quietly, his voice so soft and yet Laxus could hear him just fine.

"I am, you idiot," Laxus growled.

Gajeel rolled his eyes, "Do you want to get control of your new dragon senses or not?"

Laxus fell silent for a moment, studying the Iron Mage. He looked completely serious. Laxus squinted his eyes slightly but relaxed.

"I thought you said you wouldn't help me?" he said at length.

"Don't let it go to yer head," Gajeel snapped, "It ain't because I like ya. I just got sick of watching you jump at everything in the guildhall,

"Now, look at me. Watch how my chest moves when I breathe. How my muscles tense just before I go to hit. You can see things that other people don't pick up on. Use that to your advantage. Focus it in. Drown out the sounds of the forest, the smell of the air, the feel of the ground underneath your feet. Focus on your opponent,"

As Gajeel spoke his voice progressively dropped lower and lower until it was so quiet Laxus had to strain to hear him. The entire time his eyes never left the Iron Mage although he had no idea what he was talking about. Watch the way his chest moved? His muscles? What was there to see? So he was breathing. He was standing. There wasn't anything complex with that. What had Laxus captivated was the Iron Slayer's eyes. They were shimmering in the light of the sun, so bright they were almost orange. But beneath the blazing orbs were deep purple bags, almost dark enough to be bruises and if Laxus hadn't known better he might have assumed that was what they were. But they weren't. Which meant Gajeel wasn't just weary from the injuries he was still healing from, but also from lack of sleep.

Why hadn't he been sleeping?

Gajeel lunged, taking Laxus off guard and making him dodge hastily.

"You're not paying attention!" he brought his elbow around quickly, a hard blow aimed for Laxus's skull. Laxus's response was so swift he almost couldn't believe it himself as he blocked the hit and caught Gajeel's fist with his open palm, a serious look on his face when he blared out the question that for some reason was at the front of his mind.

"Why haven't you been sleeping?" Laxus almost startled himself as the words left his lips, but he held Gajeel's gaze as if nothing was wrong. Gajeel, however, started. His eyes widened and he jumped back, curling his lip in a snarl.

"What has that got to do with anything? I'm trying to teach you…"

"Is it because of me?" Laxus interrupted him, eyeing him pointedly. Gajeel fell silent for a moment, a scowl on his features before clicking his tongue and turning his head.

"I almost died, didn't I?" he said quietly, his voice gruff and just above a whisper as he spoke, "Ain't I allowed to lose a little sleep over it?"

"You didn't…"

"I almost _died_ goddammit! And then I-" Gajeel snapped his mouth shut, clenching his fists and sending a venomous glare a Laxus. His sudden change made Laxus retreat back a step.

"You what, Redfox?" Laxus growled. Gajeel was almost shaking with anger, or fear, or _something_ , Laxus couldn't quite tell. All he knew was Gajeel was stalking over to his jacket and grabbing it from the branch.

"Why won't you tell me what happened that night, Redfox?" Laxus caught up with him, blocking his way.

Gajeel's eyes darkened before he spoke, "Because you don't need to know,"

"Yes, I do," Laxus let a stray bolt of lightning hit close to Gajeel's spot, a warning or a threat, up to his discretion.

"If you needed to know, you'd remember," Gajeel sneered, going to step past him only to be once again blocked by the taller mage.

"I have ways I can get it out of you," Laxus's tone took a frightening edge to it, and for a split second he saw a flash of a pain-filled memory fill the eyes of the Iron Mage and a pang of guilt filled his stomach. Then, suddenly, all of the air left his lungs as two gloved hands gripped his collar and hauled him against a tree, his feet dangling just a few inches off the ground.

He gripped the Iron Mage's wrists, his ember eyes wide as they stared into the enraged rubies below. Gajeel's arms were shaking and he could smell fresh blood again; a reopening of old wounds. Gajeel's face was so close he could feel his breath against his own.

"You think you can scare me with threats?" his voice was shaking and sounded different. This was not a side of Gajeel Laxus had ever met at Fairy Tail. Maybe this was the man that had destroyed the guild and beaten half of his guildmates almost broken, "Be. My. Guest."

"Put me down," Laxus growled out through gritted teeth. He tried to bring his knee up to kick Gajeel but he seemed to anticipate it and brought up his own heavy boot to pin the Lightning Mage's knees together. Laxus could see it in Gajeel's face that he was in pain but at this point he didn't care. It was getting harder to breathe and he was quickly losing his temper. Lightning began to snap at the air dangerously close to Gajeel but he didn't flinch, only set his jaw and held his grip, his arms shaking almost violently.

"Let me go, Redfox…" Laxus charged his lightning even more, calling even angrier strikes to leave red burns up and down Gajeel's arms and scald his shirt and chest. Slowly, Laxus kept amping up the juice; putting more and more volts into his sustained attack. Gajeel didn't waver, didn't loosen his grip around Laxus's throat, but the tightness around his eyes showed he was in pain and so Laxus kept it up. One of them had to cave, either from exhaustion, passing out, or giving up, it had to happen… eventually.

Laxus was digging his nails into Gajeel's wrists, almost calling a full lightning strike down from the sky. Gajeel's eyes were squeezed shut from enduring the pain of it and his breathing was labored. Laxus was starting to see black claw its way into his vision and his lungs were starting to burn, trying to inflate with air that wasn't there. He couldn't bare it. Finally, he let out a growl and released the full amount of his power down on the two of them, causing Gajeel to drop him and recoil.

He watched his back arch, his arms and limbs twist backwards in pain as he tipped his head back and howled. The sound stung his ears and made his heart stop, like it was being ripped out of his chest the longer the noise continued. Laxus cut off his magic as quickly as he could and watched as Gajeel crumpled like discarded paper to the ground. For a while the two just sat on the ground and panted, both trying to catch their breath. After a while, it started to become clear to Laxus that Gajeel wasn't doing well.

"Oi, Redfox,"

No response.

"Gajeel," Laxus reached out to him and hesitated a moment when he realized he was shivering, "Gajeel, seriously, answer me."

"Leave me alone." his voice made Laxus want to cringe with the amount of pain in it.

"I ain't leaving you out here," Laxus growled, reaching forward warily to pull his black locks out of his face. Electricity still raced across his skin here and there and Laxus noticed that the vein beside his eye was twitching. He made no move away from his touch but his red eyes bored through him with a malicious glare. The smell of blood was starting to sting the inside of Laxus's nose, "You're bleeding."

Gajeel's eyes widened slightly before he turned his head away, his jaw tightening angrily, "You think I don't know that?"

"Where at?" Laxus sighed, his ember eyes running across Gajeel's white shirt, noticing nothing amiss.

"Tch, don't you think you've done enough?"

Laxus froze at Gajeel's words. They were cold, harsh, and furious. Laxus brought his eyes up to meet Gajeel's only to see unbridled rage boiling beneath the surface of pain and exhaustion. But more unsettling than that, Laxus noticed a scent beginning to mix with Gajeel's natural musk. It was bitter and brackish, lashing out at him accusingly as he sat with the Iron Mage in complete silence.

 _The smell of fear_ , Laxus realized suddenly, the awareness bringing a strangely tense upset to form in the pit of his stomach, _He's terrified of me._


	11. Chapter 11

Laxus glared into his mug as he listened to Mirajane gossiping behind the bar. On occasion he would offer a half-hearted grunt of recognition, but for the most part he hadn't heard a word she was saying. He was too busy sulking.

It had been over a month since he and Gajeel had fought. The Iron Mage was fully healed and was back to his antics around the guild. The two of them hadn't spoken or really looked at each other since, something that was bothering Laxus more than it really should have.

Maybe going on the mission with him – and whatever had happened that he still couldn't remember – had actually made him form a connection with the Iron Dragon. He wasn't nearly as annoying as Laxus had previous thought, especially compared to how he acted at the guildhall. But he still couldn't shake the feeling he'd gotten in the pit of his stomach when he'd looked down on him and smelled his fear. Even when he thought about it, it still wracked him.

Gajeel wasn't scared of anything. The man was almost as idiotic as Natsu in that aspect. He wasn't a man that feared anything but rather forced fear onto others, and for the most part, the raven-haired mage prided himself in that aspect. And yet what Laxus had experienced was terror, even though it was masked by anger and pain, it was still there. And it was all harbored especially for Laxus.

"Laxus," Mira's white hair flashed into view and he glanced up, meeting two curious but worried eyes in the process, "Is everything ok? You seem… off."

He was silent for a moment before suddenly furrowing his brows, "How do you make someone lose their fear of you?"

"Eh… what?" her smile faded just slightly as amused puzzlement filled her features, "Someone is scared of you, Laxus?"

"Yes, and I don't want them to be," he replied bluntly, taking another swig of his drink, "How do I change it?"

"Its not really something _you_ can do…" Mira sighed, "Mind telling me who this person is?"

"Just never mind it," Laxus sighed, putting his hand into his palm and looking across the guild, "Not like it much matters, anyway."

He heard the clamoring sound of chairs being knocked over and cast his gaze over to the source. Gajeel was in Salamander's face yelling something and the pink-haired boy was laughing loudly. Gajeel slapped the Fire Dragon on the back of the head before stepping around the table to head to the bar. He stopped a few paces away when his eyes fell on Laxus, his features quickly turning irritated, and then he pointedly walked the other direction as if he'd been headed for the request board the entire time.

Laxus let a sigh escape him before he had a chance to stop it, realizing too late that Mirajane had been studying him intently the entire time. His ember eyes rose up to her usual smiling face, only there wasn't a smile there. She looked like she was calculating and was watching Gajeel.

"Maybe its not you he's scared of but your magic, Laxus," she offered, grabbing a glass and a towel and wiping down mugs as people started returning them.

"My… magic?" he said at length, watching the barmaid. She was so perceptive.

"Didn't you realize that your magic affects him differently than others?" she looked pointedly at him now, her eyes almost critical.

 _"Iron and electricity don't mix well…"_

"No I didn't," he watched the Iron Mage out of the corner of his eye, the way his arm muscles flexed occasionally as he stared at the request board, his mind clearly not on whatever the papers were showing him.

"He's like a human lightning rod, Laxus," Mira leaned across the counter, gaining his attention. He suddenly realized she was speaking much quieter than before, her eyes on the Iron Mage as well, "Where your attack would make Natsu stumble, it would almost incapacitate Gajeel."

"But he never…" his mind went back to their fight at the cathedral with Natsu. He'd kept par with the Fire Mage, even had redirected one of Laxus's attacks to himself to save the pink-haired idiot.

"He didn't used to be an S-class mage for nothing, Laxus," Mira winked at him, her smile coming back to her face despite the serious topic, "Maybe you could try to help him overcome his fear… since it bothers you so much,"

"Who said it bothered me?" Laxus growled, feeling his face start to heat up for some reason.

"You did," she grinned, "when you asked me for help."

"I didn't ask anything," Laxus seethed quietly, dismissing the devil-woman's keen smile as she took her work to Lucy and Levy who had come bubbling up to the counter. He let his eyes wander back to the Iron Mage who was grabbing his sack of iron from the table and leaning down to talk to Lily before heading for the door. Letting out a huff, he pushed himself off the barstool and followed him outside of the bar.

"Yo," he called to him, causing the raven-haired man to stiffen, "Where are you off to so early?"

He craned his head back, sending his bloody stare over his shoulder to Laxus. His eyes were guarded and glared quietly at Laxus as he stood wordlessly. He wasn't wearing his leather jacket today, trading in his long black feathers for a black tank top though he wore the same khaki pants and studded boots as usual. Laxus didn't miss how his muscles rolled defensively as he took stock of the situation.

"Last I checked," his words were venomous despite the air of calm he was trying to put on, "I could go and do as I pleased."

Laxus gritted his teeth, trying to repress an irritated comment, "Going for a walk, then?"

Gajeel was silent for a moment before replying, "Aye."

"Mind if I join?" he was growing impatient. He wasn't good at pussyfooting around people and Gajeel was a man he never thought he'd have to treat like a five year old. He felt like a wolf that was trying to coax a sheep into following him, although Gajeel wasn't a sheep but a war-haggard mongrel like himself.

"Can't make you stay," Gajeel growled, turning to walk away.

Laxus furrowed his brow as Gajeel retreated into the woods. He didn't want to force anything on him, and he had asked if he could join him so why did he feel like he was twisting the Iron Mage's arm about this? He clicked his teeth.

"Let your magical energy flow naturally," Laxus blurted tensely, feeling ridiculous with each syllable.

Gajeel froze in his spot, not daring to look back at the Lightning Mage. Not a win, but at least the idiot was listening.

"Lightning looks for a completed circuit. If you let your magic flow naturally, you can redirect it to something else."

Wordlessly, Gajeel started once again, walking as if the conversation had never happened. Laxus watched him tersely until he vanished into the forest before turning agitatedly on his heal and heading back inside the guildhall. Mirajane watched him return with a smirk on her features.

"I take it that it didn't go well?" she smiled her usual sweet smile as he once again plopped into his barstool.

"He doesn't want shit to do with me," Laxus growled, "And the worst part is I have no idea why because I can't remember what happened on that damned mission."

Mira's smile turned into a mischievous one as her mind started working, "I bet I could fix that."

"You think you can get inside that metal head? Be my guest," Laxus grumbled into his beer.

"Well I can help at least… that is, if you're willing to do a little performance for me?"

Laxus cocked a brow at her.

"Just trust me," she smirked, "I happen to know how well he holds his booze."


	12. Chapter 12

_Hot, everything was so unbearably hot. He couldn't stand the searing in his veins that was spilling through his arteries like a tidal wave of magma. It was leaking through his organs and causing his skin to crawl. He couldn't keep running, his side was leaking the infernal fluid onto the cold stone floor. What was going on? Was he dying?_

 _"What's going on… with me? What is this?!"_

 _"Laxus, calm down…" Gajeel said calmly, the look on his face betraying what his words didn't, "I need to stitch your wound again…"_

 _"Don't touch me!" Laxus punched him in the chest hard, making him fall backwards._

 _"You just need some fresh air," Gajeel cringed back. Was that fear in his eyes? "That's all. You're going to be fine…"_

 _"You know what's going on, don't you?" Laxus regarded him harshly, fury making lightning spark even harder around him, "Tell me!"_

 _"Laxus, I don't-"_

 _Laxus grabbed him by the collar and flung him against the wall, his fingers constricting harshly around his throat. Gajeel gripped his wrists as tightly as he could. Laxus sent small, sharp volts into his metallic skin. He was made of iron. This was going to hurt, send sparks flying through his entire being as his body acted like the perfect conduit for his magic._

 _And yet he tried his best not to scream._

 _"You're going into heat…" Gajeel choked out. His chest was barely moving as it tried in vain to get more oxygen._

 _"You know I can't," Laxus sent volts into the Iron Slayer's body, making him grunt as he tried not to scream from the pain, "I'm not a real Slayer, remember?"_

 _"Laxus, I can't-"_

 _Laxus sent more electricity into him. He wouldn't call out, only gritted his teeth and arched his back in pain. It enraged him._

 _"Laxus stop!" Gajeel screamed, his voice choking in his throat as another blast of lightning hit him. Laxus disregarded him. His body was filled to the brim with rage that needed to be released and Gajeel was the perfect person to unleash it all on. His bloody eyes were swimming with pain, his throat bubbling over with the sounds of his anguish despite how he tried to keep it in._

 _Gajeel screamed as another volt had his body warping from the pain. Finally, Laxus threw him to the other wall of the cave and Gajeel cracked his head against the stone. He had barely lifted himself up when Laxus kicked him in the face, whipping his back to hit the stone wall again. Blood was trickling down his forehead and staining the ground with red. Laxus could smell it; it stung his nose and made him want to spill even more. Another attack had him screaming again, his body bending in unnatural positions as it sought release from the pain._

 _"Laxus…" he groaned out, "Stop…"_

 ** _"I'm just gonna calm you down."_**

 _God, it feels so good…_

Laxus wrenched himself up in bed, his golden eyes wild as they jolted around his dark room searching for a writhing, bleeding body on the floor. Instead of cave walls he saw the hushed light of early morning filtering into his bedroom. He was out of breath, heavy gulps making his chest swell and collapse as his lungs sought oxygen. He stayed like that for a few moments as he tried to calm himself, finally leaning his forehead onto his sweat-covered palms, his disheveled hair brushing around his fingers.

"What the hell…" Laxus breathed quietly, glaring down at the swell under his bed sheets. His member throbbed wantonly, a call to a completely different instinct than what he'd been listening to in his nightmare. When he closed his eyes he could still see Gajeel's ruby eyes glistening up at him, begging for redemption from the hell Laxus had been putting him through. His attacks had been so brutal, bent for taking life and nothing else.

Angrily, Laxus tossed the blankets off of himself and stomped across the morning-chilled house to pull on his clothes and head out the door. Taking a deep breath of fresh air, he let the cool breeze chase away what was left of the sleep in his system and headed slowly to the guild.

"Gajeel!" Mirajane smiled sweetly from behind the bar. Gajeel started at her voice, not even realizing she'd been there until just now. He'd been too caught up in staring at the bottom of his mug, his mind wandering to dangerous places. He'd been having vivid dreams lately that left him in a sweat when he woke up the next morning. His restlessness had even made it impossible for Lily to sleep with him anymore, which may have been for the best given the nature of his recent fantasies…

"I have a favor to ask you," she smiled down at him, her white hair spilling down her bare shoulders as she leaned over the bar to better meet his eye level.

"Eh? What is it, devil woman?"

He saw her lip twitch slightly at her nickname, something that made a smirk begin to twist onto his face. But it quickly vanished when she slapped a handful of what looked like sheet music on the bar.

"Tonight is our monthly girl's night," she grinned devilishly at him, "And I wanted entertainment for tonight: a romantic duet by two of our guild's male singers,"

"You hate my singing."

"When did I ever…?"

"You banned me from the stage."

She let out an agitated sigh before continuing, "I'm removing my ban as long as you're ready by 6 o'clock tonight. As an added incentive, you get free booze all night or until I have to kick your ass out because you're disrupting the girls."

"Fine," he growled, snatching up the sheets, "I'll sing your shitty love song. Who's my partner?"

"Oh don't you worry," Mira grinned sweetly, "He'll be ready by tonight."

"Why don't I like the sound of that?" Gajeel grunted, grabbing his bag and stepping away from the bar.

"Just keep in mind the free alcohol. I'm sure that'll make it ok," she waved dismissively as she picked up a rag and started washing mugs. Gajeel only grunted in reply, but he definitely didn't miss the devilish grin she sent his way when she thought his back was turned.

Gajeel pulled angrily at his bowtie, cursing under his breath as he once again looked over the lyrics to the sappy song Mira had given him. Two mugs of beer before he'd even made it to the stage still wasn't enough to make him not hate singing the damn thing. Surely a woman wrote the damn thing because he was certain no _man_ would have come up with the sickly sweet lyrics on his own. What he couldn't believe was that he was actually going to be singing it. On stage. With another man.

Who could've Mira had suckered into doing that? Actually, what other guy could sing in the entire place? Definitely not Salamander or Stripper. For a brief moment he entertained the thought of Jet or Droy getting on stage but there'd be no way they'd get in front of a crowd, especially not with Levy there watching. They'd lose their shit. So who the hell…?

Gajeel's red eyes cut angrily to the stomping of boots up the side stairs headed for where he was back stage. To his complete and utter surprise, Laxus glided quietly up the stairs wearing matching attire with hair slicked back with mousse that smelled almost fruity. Every here and there a rebellious strand would curl gently away from the others, but it only seemed to make him look like some bad boy trying to look good. Gajeel couldn't stop the snarl that pulled at his lips.

"You're shitting me," he huffed, crossing his arms as Laxus walked past him nonchalantly and started adjusting one of the microphones.

"Think you're the only one in this damn place that can sing?" Laxus's smirked.

"Tch, whatever," Gajeel growled, "Shoulda guessed you'd be into this type of sappy stuff since you're such a pretty boy."

"If I'm not mistaken, you seem to be on this stage too, human lighting rod."

"I'm just in it for the free booze," Gajeel muttered just as Mirajane skipped up onto the stage and took her seat at the piano.

"You boys ready?" she grinned happily, adorned in a sleek black dress that sparkled in the dim 'romantic' lighting.

"As I'll ever be," Gajeel huffed, messing with the mics as the curtains began to pull up exposing a guildhall full of frilly dresses and giggling women. Everyone seemed to be dressed in their best. For a night out, it seemed the girls still needed to impress each other with expensive fabrics and jewelry.

The piano suddenly brought him back and he took a deep breath, his fingers gently grasping the stand in his best actor's performance, swaying gently forward as if to show that his entire heart was in what was about to leave his lips…

"Yes, I do, I believe that one day I will be where I was, right there, right next to you…"

The entire room suddenly hushed, all whispers ceasing as his voice filled the hall. He wanted to smile in victory at how they all were mesmerized by his voice but he knew that would be breaking character.

"Your touch, your skin, where do I begin? No words can explain the way I'm missing you…"

His ruby eyes swept over the crowd, taking in some of the expressions of their faces. He could feel Laxus's gaze on him, taking in his movements as he serenaded the crowd. Well fine, if he wanted to watch let him. He could put on a good show if he wanted to.

"Can I lay by your side? Next to you, you. And make sure you're alright? I'll take care of you. I don't want to be here if I can't be with you tonight…"

A short pause of just Mirajane caressing the keys before Laxus's voice cut through the silence. His voice sent a chill through Gajeel's spine. He crooned beautifully into the microphone, each syllable dancing through the air and seemingly into Gajeel's soul. He was trying to keep his cool façade but inside his heart was starting to pick up speed.

"I'm reaching out to you, can you hear my call? This hurt that I've been through, I'm missing you, missing you like crazy…"

 _"Can I lay by your side…"_

"Next to you…"

"You…"

 _"And make sure you're alright?"_

Their voices melted together like ice into the sea's warmer waters. It was perfect harmony, filling the room with a sound like lustful heat seeping into the bones of every being in the entire place. His skin felt charged as if the distance between Laxus and him wasn't enough to keep the Lightning Dragon's static at bay. He felt the hair on his arms rise, his spine sending tiny shivers to echo through his bones. Each note that they sent twisting together was tantalizing and seductive in a way so foreign but intriguing to Gajeel.

"Lay me down tonight…"

"Lay me by your side…"

"Woah, Lay me down tonight…"

"Lay me by your side…"

 _"Can I lay by your side?"_

"Next to you."

 _"You…"_

Stricken silence was all there was for one second, two, and then cheers began to come from the tables as the curtains fell on the duet. Gajeel just stood, staring at the red fabric while he calmed himself. For Mavis' sakes he felt like he'd just run a marathon. His breath was shaky and his hands were grasping the stand just a tad too tightly. Even Laxus seemed locked in his place, the song like a strange spell that locked them in place.

"You guys did marvelously," Mirajane smiled as she saddled up to the two of them, "I don't think I've heard a more perfect harmony."

"I don't sing," Laxus replied quickly, stripping off his tux jacket and loosening his bowtie.

"Well you do now," she crossed her arms in amusement as she watched him, her eyes obviously tracing his now exposed arms, "I have to say, I see you in a new light now, Laxus Dreyar."

"You've heard me sing in the shower,"

"Yeah but… this was different," she leaned forward, her long eyelashes batting delicately.

Gajeel felt something angry roll in his stomach, something akin to disgust but too heated to be anything less than jealousy. Immediately he regret the feeling, biting it back as quickly as it had flared up and turning away from Mira's obvious flirting. He tried his best not to stomp down the stairs but his footfalls still seemed to ring out loud and furious in his retreat.

"Better go make use of that open bar…" he growled to himself, passing quietly through the throng of women.


	13. Chapter 13

**ADULT THEMES AND GRAPHIC SCENES AHEAD:**

 **THIS IS GOING TO BE AN EXTREMELY GRAPHIC FANFICTION. IT IS NOT INTENDED FOR IMMATURE AUDIENCES AND MAY CONTAIN TRIGGERS FOR SOME READERS. IT IS YOUR RESPONSIBILITY AS A READER TO KEEP THIS IN MIND FOR THE FUTURE. I WILL REPOST THIS DISCLAIMER AT THE BEGINNING OF EVERY CHAPTER WITH GRAPHIC CONTENT. I WILL DO MY BEST TO ENSURE THAT IF YOU SKIP THE CHAPTER THAT YOU WILL NOT LOSE ANY OF THE EXPERIENCE.**

 **PLEASE BE KIND AND CONSIDERATE WHEN READING. CRITIQUE IS ENCOURAGED BUT RUDENESS WILL NOT BE TOLERATED.**

 **THANK YOU FOR READING. I HOPE YOU ENJOY.**

 **EDIT: WHEN YOU SEE THE (*****) IF YOU HAVE INTENTIONS OF SKIPPING ANY GRAPHIC SEGMENTS, THAT'S WHERE YOU NEED TO SWITCH TO THE NEXT CHAPTER. YOU WON'T LOSE ANY OF THE STORY BY SKIPPING.**

Laxus kept his distance from the Iron Dragon for the rest of the night, watching him make his way through mug after mug of beer. He occasionally entertained his own glass, which was usually accompanied by Mira's mischievous smile, and a slight flaunt of her voluptuous cleavage. He would smirk and flirt with her slightly, although halfheartedly. More than anything he was watching Gajeel, though.

His body language was different. His smell altered just slightly. He'd picked up just a whiff when they'd been singing on stage. It was something he'd yet to experience since acquiring his new dragon instincts and with his lack of understanding he couldn't place it. But whatever it was, it was primal and warm. It reminded him of a rough fight or a fiery touch…

"He seems to be having trouble holding his liquor," Mira sighed, leaning against the bar and tilting her head to gaze at the Iron Mage, "A few more drinks and he'll start getting rowdy and someone will have to walk him home."

She looked at Laxus pointedly.

"Me?" he wrinkled his nose at her.

"You wanted to know what happened during your mission, didn't you?" her eyes glinted in the dim light, her voice hushed so the other Slayer wouldn't be able to hear her, "He has a hard time staying quiet when he's drunk."

"You're pretty crafty, you know that Mirajane?" Laxus's lips quirked upward in a sly grin.

She flipped her ivory locks gracefully, "I know. But I kind of wish you'd walk me home instead,"

"Mira…" he dropped his voice, his grin disappearing just slightly, "I thought we talked about this…"

"I know, I know," she crossed her arms, causing her breasts to swell as she gazed over at the Iron Slayer, "I guess I'll be finding someone else to spend my time with."

"A woman like you could have any man you'd want," he offered with a slight quirk of his brow.

"Yes… any man except you," she winked at him before returning to the counter to make a few more drinks for a couple of girls who walked up.

Laxus ran his fingers through his hair before pushing himself out of his chair and heading for the Iron Mage. He was guzzling down the rest of his mug, his whole body swaying back just a tad too far as he did. Laxus could smell the alcohol from his breath; so thick it was a surprise to him Gajeel hadn't already passed out. But no, he slammed his mug onto the hardwood and demanded another to which Mira shot him a devil glare.

"I think you've had enough," Laxus placed a palm on his shoulder, his yellow eyes locking with Gajeel's swimming red. The veins in his eyes were engorged with blood, making his eyes appear smoky and dark pink around the melted ruby irises. They struggled to focus for just a moment, sweeping swiftly behind the hulking Lightning Dragon to survey any onlookers behind him. It suddenly occurred to Laxus that he was still somewhat in his right mind, or maybe it was just the Phantom Lord training showing through the dozens of mugs of alcohol. He was still methodical even when drunk.

"Did I ask for your opinion, Sparky?" his voice almost startled Laxus, more just a low, feral growl than a voice at all. Laxus glanced up to Mirajane who shot the two men a wary look before turning back to smile at her customers. Gajeel hadn't moved his gaze the entire time. There was no venom in his stare but more a challenge for Laxus to try to move him and see what would happen.

"Mira's gonna cut you off anyway, Redfox," Laxus said coolly, "You probably can't even walk."

"I can walk just _fine_ ," he snapped still too low to attract attention. Angrily, he shrugged off Laxus's grasp and rose shakily, gripping the bar hard enough to warp the wood under his popping knuckles. His eyes adjusted and readjusted, his body swaying in his drunken stupor as his mind tried its best to muddle through the best route to the exit. After a few moments he finally stepped forward, making his way languidly towards the exit. Laxus followed after him, not daring to offer a hand lest the Iron Mage start a ruckus and Mira lose her temper with him once and for all. The chilled air was a blessing in a sense as it seemed to snap the shorter mage just slightly back to his bearings.

"Where do you live, Redfox?" Laxus crossed his arms and came up beside him, watching his eyes look blearily ahead.

"That way…" he sighed, his breath forming a foggy puff in front of his face. Laxus didn't ask him if he needed help, knowing well enough that Gajeel would immediately deny it. Instead he just casually slipped his arm underneath Gajeel's and let him stumble against him for their journey to a small house on the outskirts of Magnolia.

Laxus was a little shocked at the condition of the place. The outside was shabby with barren gardens that hadn't been tended to by the two bachelors who lived there. But while the outside was rugged in appearance and not much to behold, as Gajeel opened the door Laxus was immediately greeted with the gentle scents of a well made home. Gajeel stumbled forward, leaving Laxus in the doorway as he threw his keys towards a nightstand and missed. He stalked into the small home, shedding his jacket and boots as he walked before finally making it to the side of the couch where he toppled over the arm to land solidly on the cushions.

"Make yerself a'home," was his only welcome as Laxus quietly shut the door.

"All the missions you take and this was the best house you could afford?" he treaded softly up to couch, crossing his arms over the back and leaning over to meet hazed eyes below.

"Tch, no one wanted t'take in the man that destroyed the Fairy Tail guild," his lip quirked up in a crooked grin as he met Laxus's gaze, "Besides, 'used to be a lot worse. Fixed up half this shit hole b'm'self."

"I see," Laxus didn't return his smile; just let the two lapse into charged silence. He didn't know how to ease the conversation where he wanted it to go without bringing up the Iron Mage's guard. Gajeel, it seemed, was already on to him.

"If you're gonna say it, Sparky, jist get it over with," his head lulled to the side as he spoke, his raven hair spilling over the edge of the couch. Laxus could still smell the alcohol on his breath even from so far away. His feet hung lazily over the arm of the couch, just not long enough to graze the floor.

"I still can't remember," he conceded, staring at Gajeel's facial features. His studs glistened slightly in the dim light from the windows, his ruby eyes still swimming drunkenly despite how still he'd become, "I want you to tell me."

"I told you, remember it by yerself. I ain't helpin' ya," he pushed himself up angrily, wavered a moment, and then made his way past the couch for the hall. Laxus growled and grabbed his shoulder, this time digging his fingertips into the hard muscle. He spun the Iron Mage around and pinned him to the wall. Gajeel's attempts at freedom were muddled by his drunkenness and all he could do was glare up at the yellow-eyed Slayer.

"Just. Tell. Me."

"You think you can just fucking bully me like some little shit?" Gajeel spat up at him, ruby eyes filled with rage. Laxus met his irate stare, his mind trying to find a way to make him speak. Why wouldn't he just say what happened? What was it he was hiding? Weakness? Fear?

Laxus relented with a sigh, his grip loosening, "I want to know…"

"There ain't noth-!"

"…I want to know why I'm having these nightmares," Laxus diverted his gaze to the wall just beside Gajeel's ear, staring at the wood that desperately needed to be repainted. He couldn't meet the Iron Mage's gaze for some reason. It was like he was spilling his guts to him, and he didn't like how forced it felt, "I want to know if I really did that to you. I want to know why I was trying to kill you, why I almost succeeded. Why is my body changing? Why did I suddenly start hearing things and seeing things I never could before?"

He brought his eyes up to Gajeel's, noticing how the red shifted quietly in the shadows of the quiet house. They were just slightly wide from where he was trying to hide his surprise. His breathing was controlled, trying not to give away whatever thoughts were going through his mind. Laxus took in a silent breath, his lungs immediately filling with the smell of Gajeel. The same scent, the feral, raw aroma that had him reeling on stage earlier filled his lungs. His face was dipping lower, keeping those bloody eyes as he became strikingly close.

"I want to know… why you smell like that…" his voice was low, not quite a growl. Immediately, Gajeel's façade cracked and he brought his hands up to grip Laxus's collar, holding him in place.

"Yer too damn close if you can smell me, you ass…" his voice was rough and angry but his hands were just barely shaking, his eyes recalling something Laxus didn't have the luxury of remembering.

"Why are you shaking?" Laxus's voice was even lower now, not a whisper but no longer demanding to know, "How can I make it so you're not afraid of me anymore?"

"I'm not…"

"You don't get scared. You don't lose control. Everything that you do, you allow to happen. So what could I have possibly done to…" his hands grasped where Gajeel's held his collar, gently loosening his grip, "make your hands shake like this?"

"Tch, what the hell does it matter?" he mumbled, his jaw clenching angrily. Laxus leaned forward, taking a deep breath in. The scent worked its way through his ribs, his arms, swimming through his body hungrily, "Oi! Back the hell up!"

Laxus felt like his mind was fuzzy. Without hesitation, he crossed the empty space between them, pushing Gajeel's hands away from his collar. To Laxus's surprise, his grasp relinquished and he seemed to shrink back against the wall as if he expected it to swallow him up at any minute, or maybe he wanted it to. He turned his head to the side, tossing his Raven locks as he did so and glared at Laxus out of the corner of his eye. Laxus was inches away. He could feel the other Slayer's heat thrumming like energy between them.

"Laxus…" his voice contained a warning even though he knew he couldn't fight the larger Mage off. He was too tired, too drunk to do anything.

"I just…" Laxus's breath was catching in his throat. He felt like he wasn't in control of his own body anymore. It was reacting to whatever scent was falling from Gajeel's pores like a toxin. He leaned down towards tanned skin covering hard muscle. His lips pressed against the warmth of Gajeel's neck, feeling his pulse slamming into high gear at the contact.

"Laxus… stop…"

 _"Laxus stop!"_

 _I can't…_

 _(*****)_

His tongue slipped from between his lips, running a cool trail up Gajeel's neck to his jaw. He could feel Gajeel's muscles contract, the shakiness of the breath that he took in. His scent seemed to explode all around them, making Laxus's body react in strange ways. He wanted more. He wanted to taste his skin, to feel him in intimate ways. The logical part of his brain was berating his actions, screaming for him to pull back that instant and leave in the hopes that Gajeel was too drunk to really comprehend what was going on. But his hands didn't release the prisoner under him, his lips didn't desist their ascent of Gajeel's jaw to his ear, his teeth pulling at one of the studs that was held there.

Gajeel's breath was in tatters and his body was shaking. Why was he still shaking? How was Laxus still scaring him even now?

"Laxus… please…"

 _"L-Laxus… Stop… I can't…"_

Laxus brought his hand up to cup the Iron Mage's chin, tilting it towards him and meeting his bloody eyes again. They were guarded and chilled, reliving something Laxus couldn't even guess. His lips were pressed in a tight line, his body trying to keep itself together as he met Laxus's golden eyes.

"I don't want you to be scared," Laxus whispered against Gajeel's lips, his breath ghosting across the Iron Mage's face.

"Then please, let me go."

"I… I can't…"

His lips pressed against Gajeel's. They were warm and fierce, unrelenting, not soft and supple like he'd been used to. But it wasn't bad, in fact he relished the feeling of them fighting him for dominance. But he wasn't stopping there; his body was riled. His tongue pushed against him, prying for entrance and Gajeel tried to pull away from him. Laxus held his chin and pulled back briefly, letting a sigh roll from his mouth.

"Laxus, stop… this isn't… you don't want to do this."

 _I can't stop…_

Laxus's kisses were becoming fiercer, pulling tattered breaths from the Iron Dragon. His hands constricted around Gajeel's wrists, keeping them trapped against the wall. His tongue pushed into Gajeel's mouth, sliding against the warm muscle hidden past his lips. Gajeel was fighting him, refusing to deepen the kiss despite the heat rising to his skin. He tossed his head back, breaking their contact with heavy breaths. Laxus didn't lose any steam, however, and continued his assault on Gajeel's neck, nipping at his skin and running hot trails up corded muscle with his tongue.

He wanted more. Felt lust like a beast, clawing through his chest to be released on the man in front of him. He released Gajeel's wrists to run his hands up his forearms and grip his biceps. Laxus could feel the muscles constricting and releasing beneath his fingers, couldn't help his hands from wandering to the button-down shirt he'd worn on stage that night. They were working without his command, running up the fabric and disheveling the otherwise neat garment that concealed the Iron Mage's form. Laxus pulled apart his shirt, revealing a scarred chest that was heaving with ragged breaths.

"L-Laxus…" Gajeel breathed, trying his best to resist Laxus's advances with no avail. He dug his claws into Laxus's arms, trying to halt their procession across his chest, "Laxus… please. You have to… stop…"

Laxus kissed down his throat, nipped at his collar and was making his way down his chest. Gajeel was shuddering under his touch, his whole body responding readily to Laxus's touches and licks. Shivers of pleasure were crawling up and down his spine the farther down Laxus went. His stomach bunched with nervous tension and expectation as Laxus's lips touched his peck and began a hot trail down his abs. He hissed out a breath when he felt the wet heat of Laxus's tongue run across the line of his trousers.

"Sh-shit… Laxus, wait!"

But he wasn't paying any mind to Gajeel's protests. He was running his tongue over the lip of the fabric, his fangs piercing into the offending clothing in an aggressive tug downwards. One of his hands was easily flicking open the metallic button that was holding the clothing in place whilst the other drew daringly close to the bulge that was throbbing in Gajeel's pants. Frantically, Gajeel tried to stop Laxus from continuing but in his drunkenness he reeled to the side and stumbled, digging his nails into the wall as he crashed to the floor.

Laxus was hungry, was craving more of Gajeel's flesh to touch, to kiss, to taste. He took the opportunity readily and pounced on the still disorientated drunk. He nipped his skin gently while his hands hastily fumbled Gajeel's hardened member out of his pants and boxers, relishing the hiss that escaped his partner's lips at Laxus's touch. He took hold of the ready member without hesitation, the soft skin a contrast to his calloused hands. It was warm and throbbing in his grasp, ever hardening as he circled his fingers around the shaft and slid them downwards.

Gajeel's claws dug into Laxus's shoulders, weakly trying to push him away despite the glaze that was quickly covering his eyes. After just a few pumps he was barely resisting at all, instead his breath was ghosting out of his mouth rapidly whilst Laxus worked him.

"Laxus…" the name was no more than a wonton groan escaping the other man's lips and it caused the hair to raise on the back of Laxus's neck. He pumped harder, his tongue running a hot trail up Gajeel's throat as he worked. He felt incredibly aroused, totally empowered. He could see every muscle on the Iron Mage's chest and stomach tense and release, his thighs beginning to shudder as he came ever closer to release.

Laxus's tongue travelled south, mapping out a path across Gajeel's tanned chest and scarred stomach. He was making his way to his navel, and then crossing the low sloping V leading to his ultimate goal. He hesitated just a moment before pushing the warm organ to his lips and running his tongue across the tip, tasting the bead of semen which had swollen there from lust. His eyes flicked up towards Gajeel's, watching the mage's ruby irises swim in ecstasy as they rolled backwards and his back arched, thrusting his hips upwards into Laxus's mouth. The hands that had been placed firmly on his shoulders to keep him away were suddenly making their way towards golden locks in order to help him angle deeper and before he knew it, Laxus was taking the Iron Mage's full member into his mouth.

The smooth skin slid past his sharp canines towards his uvula, desperately trying to sheath as far into the Lightning Dragon's throat as possible. Laxus's eyes widened, his mind trying to make his throat loosen and allow more of the organ inside. A deep groan ripped its way from the Iron Mage's lips as Laxus moved his tongue against his shaft, constricting his mouth as he sucked gently. He slid his head up and down, his eyes staying trained on the face above him. Gajeel was lost in the pleasure, his claws digging into Laxus's golden locks as he helped him move to the right rhythm. He was relentless in his want, pulling Laxus down hard and grinding his hips into the suction.

Laxus deep throated him until his lips were pushed against Gajeel's hilt. He could feel his muscles shaking and a curse slip into a wonton groan as heat shot into his mouth. Laxus's eyes widened as he processed what had just happened, swallowing down the warm cum quickly and leaning back onto his heels. He was out of breath, suddenly startled at everything that had just happened. His eyes whipped over to Gajeel's, meeting a set of bleary red eyes. He lay there for an impossibly quiet moment, not removing his gaze before finally his eyelids fluttered closed.


	14. Chapter 14

It took Laxus a few moments to realize he'd just passed out. The weariness and booze had finally taken its toll. Even still, Laxus stood staring, his stomach sinking to an impossibly low place. What had he just done?

He's just forced oral sex on Gajeel.

 _Forced._

He sat there for what felt like hours, just staring at him. His body refused to move, finally released from whatever spell that had led him to this place. He felt tired and despicable. Secretly he prayed that maybe the other Slayer was too drunk to remember what had happened, that he'd wake up and have no idea of the events that had transpired that night. But he also knew the thought was equally stupid and deplorable. He'd just been raped. How could he _not_ remember?

A slight tremble that went through Gajeel's body snapped him out of his spiraling thoughts. He hadn't moved an inch, his body trembling just slightly from the chill of being half dressed. Laxus contemplated what to do for a moment, his hands wanting to move but not finding the ability.

He couldn't just leave him like this: dumped in the middle of his hall shivering and half naked. Slowly, steadily, he rose to his knees and bent forward. Slipping one arm under his legs and another under his shoulders. After a silent breath, or maybe two, he lifted himself up to his feet. Gajeel's dead weight was heavy, but not too much for him to carry such a short distance.

He put him down as gently as he could and straightened, giving the Iron Mage a once over. Hesitantly at first, he reached down and shimmied him out of his shirt, folding it neatly and placing it on the dresser. When he turned back he let his eyes glide over his body, this time taking in details. Scars crisscrossed his skin, a macabre pattern on the Iron Dragon's flesh. Some were pale and fresh, others less prominent and dulled from years of existence. Each one held a painful story, though he could only guess at what they could be. He found himself leaning down again, his eyes drawn to one that ran across his hip. He placed a warm hand against it, running his thumb across the softer flesh. His eyes made their way up his chest, following some up them even so far up as his collar, slim ones that were probably aimed for his throat but came up short.

That's when his eyes notice a particular set of scars right at his jugular. The marks weren't old, only a couple months maybe. It looked like a bite mark, and a fierce one at that. Laxus's brows drew together as he lifted his hand and brought his up to the wound, placing his fingers on two of the more pronounced marks. Gajeel stirred beneath him, his eyes fluttering open for just a moment and locking with Laxus's. For a moment, he froze, not sure if he should feel horrified or try to explain his actions. Gajeel's eyes glittered like soft rubies in the dim light, not quite registering what was going on as he looked into Laxus's yellow. Then, without a word, they fluttered closed again and his stilled breath continued at a slower pace.

Laxus let out a breath he hadn't realized he'd kept held. He straightened and ran his fingers through his hair nervously before bringing up a blanket and letting it fall over Gajeel's frame. For a while he contemplated leaving and going back to his home whilst staring down at the passed out form below him. He couldn't think of what was worse: Gajeel not remembering and waking up wondering why the hell he was there or Gajeel remembering and Laxus not being there. If he didn't remember, he'd be able to pick up Laxus's scent as soon as he woke up, so there'd be no hiding the fact that he had at least walked him home.

Laxus let out a defeated breath. What was wrong with him? Why the hell had he even done it in the first place? His stomach churned with anger and disgust. Finally, he pulled himself away from the bedside and made his way to the couch, dropping onto it roughly and pulling his jacket to lay over himself. Whatever happened in the morning, he needed to be there. He lay there for another eternity before exhaustion finally allowed him to sleep.

Gajeel's mind was fuzzy as he slowly dragged himself out of his alcohol-induced coma. He pushed himself up slowly, his head feeling heavier than it had the night before. His eyes blearily focused on the room around him, momentarily resting on his shirt folded neatly on his dresser. He furrowed his brow, his mind trying to bring back memories of the previous night and coming up blank. Usually when he came home drunk he'd wake up the next morning to clothes strewn about haphazardly around the tiny house. It would be like Lily to pick up after him, but Lily was out on a mission with Charla and Wendy. So who…?

He threw his legs over the side of the bed and stumbled drowsily over to his bedroom door. The scent that greeted him from the hall made him stop, his nose wrinkling as he immediately recognized the smell. His eyes fell to the wall, apparent scratch marks trailing down the plaster made his eyes widen. A sigh from the living room made him start and he looked warily over to the couch. Blonde hair was just noticeable from where he was standing, along with a pair of boots sitting off to the side. His heart seized and he quickly backpedaled to the bathroom and slammed the door shut.

Even if the memories were fuzzy and broken, it didn't take a genius to figure out what happened. The smell of sweat and passion were still lingering in the air. Laxus's scent was clinging to his skin, wild and fervent, unyielding and uncontrollable. Angrily, hastily, Gajeel flipped on the water to the shower and stepped in. Immersing his body in the steaming water both invigorated his still groggy mind and relaxed his muscles which previously had been coiling into tight knots. A tremor shook its way down his spine and he rested his palms on the freezing tiles.

This was getting way out of hand and Gajeel needed to put a stop to it. He cursed under his breath. Why couldn't Laxus just control himself?

Laxus jolted awake with the sound of a door slamming. He heard water and quickly caught the scent of soap wafting on humid air down the hall. A tight ball began to form in the pit of his stomach as he realized that Gajeel had finally awoken from his alcoholic slumber. His mind immediately jumped into high gear desperately trying to bring up some sort of defense for when the Iron Mage finally came barging into the living room and giving him hell for his actions the previous night.

He was coming up sourly short. There was no way to defend when he'd done. In fact, he wanted Gajeel to berate him. That was what he deserved, after all. Hell, he'd probably just stand there and take it if the opposing Dragon Slayer laid into him with iron fists. He sank into the couch and pulled his jacket up to the bottom of his nose, looking akin to a child hiding from the dark under his sheets. If he could have disappeared right at that very second from total existence, he probably would have.

After several agonizingly slow minutes, the sounds of water stopped and the door to the bathroom creaked open. Heavy footfalls approached confidently and then passed the couch. Laxus tilted his head to the side, mentally bracing himself for whatever was about to happen.

Ruby eyes brushed over him with little to no interest, "Eh? You slept here all night, Sparky?"

Laxus felt like he'd just been hit in the face, "Uh… yeah."

"Hm," he grunted and made his way into the kitchen, "I ain't got much as far as food goes. Do you like eggs?"

"…eggs," Laxus was dumbfounded. What was going on? There was no way Gajeel couldn't remember what had happened.

Gajeel leaned up to pull a pan from one of the cabinets, "Yes. Eggs. What the hell? It's not like you've never had them before."

"I just…" Laxus sucked in a tight breath, "I'm just disorientated."

Ruby eyes met his. They were still slightly foggy from drink but that didn't stifle the mild agitation set on the Raven-hair's features, "I know you're not hung over."

"I know that, I just…" Laxus gritted his teeth. It was like there was a hidden challenge in Gajeel's gaze, a dare to speak. He suddenly felt like a child who was in trouble, Gramps daring him to give some semblance of an explanation even though they both knew he was completely in the wrong. He finally broke the other Mage's gaze, shame making him feel like he was about to throw up. Was he seriously going to just pretend like last night didn't happen?

"You just…?" Gajeel prompted, his voice followed by he sizzle of eggs hitting hot metal.

"How can you tell that I'm not hung over?" Laxus wanted to sink into the tiniest hole on the face of Fiore.

"Because I can't smell it. Not to mention if you'd been drunk as well I doubt my house would be in the shape it is right now," Laxus saw him cast his eyes to the hall where wallpaper was curling back like a wound on the wall, "We don't exactly get along."

"I'm working on it," Laxus muttered.

"Eh?"

"I said I'm working on it," Laxus brought his eyes back up to Gajeel's, seeing the question hiding amongst the blood red, "I got it. My magic hurts you more than others and it doesn't help that you make me lose my temper…" he quieted and looked down at his boots which were still laying on the floor next to the couch, "I'm sorry… for what I did to you when you were teaching me to control my dragon instincts. I'm working on it, I swear."

"Geehee…"

Laxus started at the giggle that escaped the Iron Mage's lips.

"The great Laxus Dreyer has graced me with an apology. Well, I guess this won't be a morning I'll soon forget," Gajeel laughed and dished the eggs onto a couple of plates, "Now get yer ass fed and out of my house."


	15. Chapter 15

**ADULT THEMES AND GRAPHIC SCENES AHEAD:**

 **THIS IS GOING TO BE AN EXTREMELY GRAPHIC FANFICTION. IT IS NOT INTENDED FOR IMMATURE AUDIENCES AND MAY CONTAIN TRIGGERS FOR SOME READERS. IT IS YOUR RESPONSIBILITY AS A READER TO KEEP THIS IN MIND FOR THE FUTURE. I WILL REPOST THIS DISCLAIMER AT THE BEGINNING OF EVERY CHAPTER WITH GRAPHIC CONTENT. I WILL DO MY BEST TO ENSURE THAT IF YOU SKIP THE CHAPTER THAT YOU WILL NOT LOSE ANY OF THE EXPERIENCE.**

 **PLEASE BE KIND AND CONSIDERATE WHEN READING. CRITIQUE IS ENCOURAGED BUT RUDENESS WILL NOT BE TOLERATED.**

 **THANK YOU FOR READING. I HOPE YOU ENJOY.**

 **EDIT: I APOLOGIZE IN ADVANCE FOR ANYONE WHO DIDN'T WANT TO READ EXPLICIT PARTS. THERE WASN'T A CLEAR PLACE TO CUT THE WRITING AND INSTEAD OF RUIN THE FLOW OF EVERYTHING I DECIDED THE CONTENT WASN'T SO BAD THAT I'D PUT ***** TO INDICATE WHERE TO FLIP CHAPTERS. YOU SHOULD SEE IT COMING LONG BEFORE IT HAPPENS THOUGH SO READ AT YOUR OWN RISK.**

"Wow, Laxus, you were amazing!" Freed grinned at him behind a waterfall of emerald hair, "Your skills in dispatching dark mages is unmatched!"

"We all really make the best team in the guild," Evergreen crooned, fanning herself as she looked slyly at the blonde. Her outfit was as promiscuous as always, not nearly as beautiful as Mirajane but still projecting a confident attractiveness all her own. Although Laxus had never recognized her as anything other than a teammate, he had to admit she was pretty.

"I can't wait to get back to the guild," Bixlow chimed, his eyes glowing excitedly beneath his helmet, "My babies and I are ready for a good rest!"

"Good rest! Good rest!" his floating dolls tolled happily as they floated around his head.

"I'm sure you're looking forward to seeing Elfman again, huh, Ever?" Bixlow grinned devilishly.

"I don't know what you're talking about!" Evergreen brushed her hair from her shoulder offhandedly, just barely not concealing the red that tipped her ears.

Laxus sighed at their antics. His eyes traveling lazily to the horizon where the sunset silhouetted the guild as it overlooked the city of Magnolia. It was quite the amazing sight but Laxus felt far from welcomed by it. How long had it been now since he and Gajeel had spoken? Two weeks? Three? He'd tried to keep his mind off of it as much as he could but to no avail. Every time he saw the Iron Mage it was only for fleeting moments and never alone. The raven-haired Slayer seemed to be doing everything in his power to avoid him. Pantherlily, Levy, Wendy, or even Salamander was always very near. And if he were alone it was always with a purpose. He was leaving on a mission, heading home, or heading back to his seat from the bar.

Even Marijane had made comment on the night Laxus had walked him home drunk. Both had hoped to repair whatever strange relationship the two had but the night had only aggravated the situation and Laxus refused to fess up as to why. Honestly, he couldn't blame Gajeel for avoiding him like the plague. It seemed he'd lost every shred of control he had around the Iron Dragon since…

 _That goddamn mission…_

"Are they upsetting you, Laxus? I will make them stop bickering if you wish," Freed's voice interrupted his thoughts and brought him crashing back to the present. He looked at him quizzically for a moment before realizing how charged he'd made the air around them in his deep thought. He immediately repressed the magical energy.

"I'm fine," Laxus conceded, his deep voice rolling out lazily, "I'm just tired and irritable from the trip I suppose."

"It was a little longer than usual, wasn't it?" Freed smiled over at him, his stance completely at ease, "Maybe you should visit the bath house? It'll probably help to soothe your wounds and reenergize you."

"Eh?" the sore pangs of their fight barely registered; just more casualties from the many that he'd taken so many times before. Although it was true he was tired and the whole endeavor had been taxing, he didn't feel exceptionally fatigued. But then, it had been a long time since he'd used the bathhouse and the medicated waters didn't sound like such a bad idea, "Maybe."

"Well, whatever you do, I hope you feel better tomorrow," Freed chirped happily before breaking off with the rest of the Thunder God Tribe. Laxus stared after them as they disappeared down the street towards the guild, laughing and joking with one another. He let out a sigh and rolled his shoulders, feeling how stiff they'd become even during the short walk from the train. Maybe a warm bath wouldn't be such a bad idea.

When he arrived at the large stone building he felt relieved to see no one was around. He wasn't exactly in the mood to deal with other people. Once inside, he quickly stripped and put his things in a locker before heading down the tiled hallway that headed to the bath. The steam intensified as he approached and he could already feel his muscles relax from the warmth. When he turned the corner he immediately stopped, his grip around his towel clamping much tighter than before.

In the corner across the room, a lone figure was relaxing in the steaming water. Of course it had to be him, here of all places. His raven hair was fanned out around him, clinging to the walls there his head rested, waving gently in the ripples of the water around him, sticking to his biceps defiant to gravity. His tanned body was stretched out, only his chest and knees escaping the heat of the water. His head was against the tile, eyes gently shut where he relaxed in the lazy ripples and piercings glistening gently in the foggy light.

Maybe he was asleep, or maybe he was just ignoring the entrance of the other mage, but he made no move when Laxus entered the chamber nor did the easy swelling and falling of his chest change in the slightest to the intrusion. For a brief moment, Laxus considered leaving right then. He could just gather his things without Gajeel even realizing he was there and completely avoid any problem this might possibly cause. But another side of him, the stubborn one, thought the idea completely stupid. Who was he running from? Certainly not the other man in the room. What was he afraid of?

 _Another night without control…_

He pushed the thought from his mind immediately. He'd be fine. This was a public place. Someone could walk in at any moment. And whatever came over him that night was dead and buried he was sure; caused by whatever few drinks he had had that night and Gajeel's weakened state. This wasn't the case here. He wasn't going to do something like that again. He could be around him without losing it.

The whole hesitation was stupid.

With as much confidence as he could muster, he shed his towel and sat it neatly on the cool ground and then gently eased himself into the warm water. Almost immediately he felt the effect of the magic-infused bath. His muscles released and everything in his body seemed to exhale a sigh of relief. The fighting of the last couple of days, the long journey home, it all melted away in an instant. He sank into it up to his chin, allowing his golden locks to dip into the prismatic ripples. His golden eyes watched the reflection on the ceiling, following how the light refracted and spun waves across the roof.

The hair on the back of his neck rose suddenly and his heart began to pound just the smallest bit faster. He didn't have to avert his gaze to know that Gajeel was staring at him, and most likely not with the most adoring look. If a glare could pierce right through him, he was sure Gajeel was trying it right now. He sat up easily, not permitting himself to glance over at the other Mage, and ran his fingers through his hair.

Shit. Why was he suddenly so nervous? He felt like he was being put under speculation, like this was all a test to prove he could be around the other man. It was frustrating and unnerving. He wasn't going to even regard him. He was going to pretend like he wasn't there. As nonchalantly as possible, he grabbed a bar of soap and casually started to lather it against his hands.

Damn he had to concentrate so hard. He had to make sure the bar didn't slip between his fingers, that his hands weren't moving so fast as to betray his nervousness or too slow as to alert that he was being meticulous. He couldn't look agitated or flustered. He had to retain a cool demeanor lest the other know he was worked up. Why was this suddenly so complicated? What the hell was he even afraid of? _Afraid_. Who said he was _afraid_?

The splashing of water could have been a roaring waterfall for how loud it sounded in the silent room and damn him if he didn't jump. It took everything in him to just glance up offhandedly instead of whipping his head around to track the motion's source. Gajeel was leaning over, ringing out his hair and wrapping it quickly into a messy bun before grabbing his towel to secure it around his waist. He took the liberty to watch his muscles knit under his skin with each easy movement, how they stretched and retracted naturally with each shrug of his shoulders and simple intake of breath. It was like he was seeing it from the eyes of some who'd never seen another man before. Curious and entranced, he desperately ripped his eyes away just as the Iron Mage made a step to turn around.

Was he holding his breath? _Why_ was he holding his breath? Laxus rubbed his shoulder anxiously. Couldn't Gajeel just leave already? Why was he taking a thousand years about this? Each step closer echoed off the walls loudly, reminding him more and more of how there was just the two of them there. He was walking closer and closer, having to pass the Lightning Mage in order to get to the exit. He was in the process of damning himself for his poor choice in seating when a noise caught his attention.

Just when he thought Gajeel couldn't get any closer, his footfall faltered. There was the slick sound of skin sliding against tile and then a splash. Laxus skittered back as water hit him in the face and he shook his head angrily to get the hot liquid from his eyes.

"What the hell-?!" Laxus snapped, only to open his eyes and find himself staring right at a semi-supine Gajeel. Shock filled his ruby eyes and he suddenly snapped his head towards Laxus, meeting his gaze immediately and then holding it there.

Laxus froze. Everything was fine and then the metal-headed idiot had to _slip and fall_ right in front of him. For Mavis' sakes the man wasn't graceful by any means but this was absolutely ridiculous. And those penetrating red eyes were staring at him accusingly as if it were _he_ who'd done something wrong!

He had to calm down. He could feel his magical energy releasing static into the air as he became more and more frustrated. He set his jaw and tried to let out a breath, control his magical energy. How was it that this agitating moron could frustrate him like no other in the entire kingdom of Fiore and beyond?

"Watch what you're doing, Redfox," Laxus growled indignantly, shooting a glare in his direction. Gajeel didn't say a word, just slowly sat up and wiped the water from his eyes.

"Surprised you can even handle the water, Sparky,"

"Why don't you move your ass before I decide I can't handle the water, cheeky bastard..."

Suddenly it hit him in the face, the scent that had made him spiral out of control a few weeks prior. It made every nerve in his body twinge and that same primal desire start to surge back to the surface. That was when he noticed Gajeel wasn't moving, that he was sitting at a strange angle to conceal something from the Lightning Dragon Slayer.

"Shit…" Gajeel no sooner got the word out then Laxus had closed the gap between them. Gajeel's hands gripped his biceps, as much trying to pull him close as they were trying to keep him away.

"What the hell is that…?" Laxus breathed. It was filling his lungs again and he craved it, needed more.

No, he needed to stop. He wasn't going to do this again. Whatever the hell this was he wasn't going to let it control him like some starved dog going after a scrap of meat. He could feel the vein on his jaw constrict from how hard he was clenching his teeth. Ruby eyes were keeping him trapped, beckoning him to travel the short distance to his lips… Fuck. No. No that's _not_ what they were saying. He clenched his eyes shut. Seriously, he had to calm down. This was crazy.

"Get a hold of yourself," Gajeel growled.

He sounded like he was out of breath, like he was fighting something as well. Laxus stole a look back down at him, raven hair disheveled from its previous hold and laying haphazardly on his shoulders, chest heaving uneasily as if he had just run a marathon, pupils dilated and beseeching…

It slipped from his lips just as he thought it. It didn't ask permission, just arrived of its own volition, unapologetic and brash.

"You don't want me to, do you?"

Gajeel's ruby eyes widened ever so slightly, a dirty betrayal that was all the permission he needed. They crashed together like a hurricane hitting a well-weathered shore. Like a dragon and a tiger waging war against each other, their lips met in a heated battle for dominance as the two men wrapped their arms around each other. It was glorious and Laxus loved every second! Their canines scraped against each other, nails dug into flesh and tongues darted out to slither against corded muscle.

Laxus was trying his hardest not to leave marks, to leave some semblance of purity left on the scarred skin of his partner. Gajeel didn't seem to care, however, and nibbled on his neck hungrily, scraped his nails down his chest angrily, and sucked on his jaw gently. Laxus pulled the Iron Mage onto his lap, his erection sliding against the raven's backside under the water. He could feel Gajeel's member lying against his abs, the slight pulse of his lust making his kisses more aggressive. Laxus couldn't stand it, he might just release in the water at this rate.

That's when he heard it: voices.

They were coming from the doorway; down the short hall Laxus himself had walked what now seemed an eternity ago. There wasn't just one or two, but several, all that he recognized but at the moment couldn't place. He was still lost in his need for the man who was shivering on his hips. He couldn't stop now, not when he was so close and so was Gajeel. But the raven-haired Mage on top of him froze to his advances, a move that frustrated Laxus to no end and he found himself grabbing a fist full of jet black locks and pulling him down so he could plant hungry kisses on his throat.

"Laxus…!" he gasped, trying to disentangle himself from the blonde's tattooed arms, "Laxus, stop it!"

A throaty growl loosed itself from his mouth. He wasn't going to release what was his. He wasn't done yet. He was just so close. All he needed was just a few more moments and he was sure they'd both be…

A solid punch across the face had him stunned for just long enough for Gajeel to scramble out of the water, grab a towel and cover himself. Laxus, immediately snapped out of the scarily possessive thoughts he'd been having, pulled his knees together in the sudden need to hide the evidence of what they'd been doing just seconds before men from the guild began filtering into the bathhouse. Freed's emerald hair stuck out among them and he shot him an apologetic smile as he approached.

"Sorry, Laxus. When we got back to the guild and everyone asked where you were, they all decided it would be a good idea to go to the bathhouse as well. I tried to dissuade them but it obviously didn't work…"

"Hmm… yeah…" Laxus barely paid attention to his words. His eyes were too busy staying trained on the raven locks that were hastily slinking through the crowd towards the exit, "I was actually about to leave, anyway."

"I really am sorry. I know you wanted to relax. Some help I am…"

"What? It's not a big deal," Laxus' tried to hide the annoyance he so heavily felt. More than anything now he desperately just wanted to follow after the Iron Dragon Slayer, "Say… I've lost my towel in everyone coming in. Mind if I borrow yours?"

"Oh… of course, I'll just grab another one later,"

Laxus quickly covered himself, making sure no one would catch sight of his current problem, and silently strode into the safety of the locker room


	16. Chapter 16

As Laxus stepped quietly down the tiled hallway he let out a slow exhale. He was starting to feel like he was more stressed than when he had entered the damn place. Now that he thought about it, why was he even following Gajeel? Surely the man would have nothing to do with him now. More than likely he'd already dressed and left. What had he expected? To meet him outside in the bushes like some teenaged couple that couldn't get enough of each other? A casual invite back to his place to finish what they'd started?

Not a snowball's chance in hell.

"What do you want, Salamander?" Gajeel's gruff voice made Laxus freeze.

"Just wanted to know if you were ok. You seemed a little… shaken up."

Laxus felt himself bristle involuntarily. What was that supposed to mean? As quietly as he could, he sneaked behind a row of the lockers, being sure to keep out of sight from both the exit and the two Slayers. He felt silly, acting like an overly-jealous girlfriend eavesdropping on a conversation.

"Eh? I'm fine,"

The shuffle of clothing. The sound of wet feet slapping the floor.

"You know you can't lie to me. Might as well just say what's up,"

"There ain't nothing up."

A long silence. More sounds of clothing sliding against itself.

"I know you've been avoiding Laxus. I've already told you that that's not a very fair thing to do. You know how well it worked last time…"

"Piss off."

"I'm just saying, it didn't keep me away…"

"Yeah? Lucy sure did."

Another long pause.

"He'll dominate you. You can barely keep him away as it is."

"You didn't seem to mind it too much."

Laxus's gut twisted angrily and he felt like he was going to vomit. He felt a stab of pain hit him in the chest. What the hell…?

"You honestly think he's not going to hurt you? He left Mirajane without so much as a thought. He's been that way with everyone he's been with. You're just going to be ok with that? Being used?"

"How's about I make my own fucking decisions and you keep your trap shut about it, eh?"

"Because that's worked out well for you before…"

"What the hell is that supposed to mean, Salamander?"

"I know about what he did to you."

Silence.

"You can't tell me you're just fine with it. Can he even control himself now?"

 _Silence_.

"Shit, you're not serious. What, was him almost killing you not enough? Him taking advantage of you wasn't enough? Him r-!"

The loud crash of someone hitting the lockers filled the entire room. It bounced of the walls angrily and echoed off the floors and ceilings.

Laxus gritted his teeth. Salamander knew what he'd done? How? Why? What had he done that was so terrible that night that Gajeel wouldn't even let Natsu say it out loud?

"Why don't you just back the fuck off," Gajeel hissed, "I can manage my own problems. Keep your ass out of it."

The release. The sound of a body thumping to the ground.

"Fine. But when he hurts you don't come crying to me… if you even can."

Laxus dodged out of Natsu's line of sight as he marched towards the bath. His scarf was still draped around his shoulders, his pink locks bouncing innocently against his neck. Laxus noticed how his hands were clenched into fists, however, betraying the anger from the conversation he'd been having.

He heard the sound of a locker slamming shut and footsteps retreating outside. As much as Laxus wanted to follow him and demand answers, he couldn't seem to get his feet to move. Natsu's words just kept swirling in his head, critical and accusatory.

 _"Was him almost killing you not enough?"_

He almost killed him. He took advantage of him once and was in the middle of doing it again. He couldn't stop, even when he knew their guildmates were about to walk in on them.

 _"He'll dominate you."_

 _"You honestly think he's not going to hurt you?"_

 _"Can he even control himself?"_

What was wrong with him? What had he done? What was he _doing_?

He'd practically raped him while he was drunk. He'd beat the shit out of him twice, once almost to death. He couldn't stop himself. He'd become worse than an animal. What had happened to him? Why was this so out of his control? What even was _this_?

He desperately tried to push the thoughts out of his mind as he dressed. He needed answers. This was it. He was going to find Gajeel, bring up what he'd overheard, and demand the truth. Enough was enough. He was tired of being kept in the dark. Tired of being told what had happened wasn't important. He knew it was a lie and he'd tried his best to accept it anyway but to no avail. He needed to know and his mind and soul would never be satisfied until he did.

He stormed out of the bathhouse and followed Gajeel's dying scent. He'd catch up to him in no time, he'd find out the truth. His gut was twirling in a terrible way that made him want to wretch. He could handle this. Whatever Gajeel said, whatever he did, he could handle it. He took a deep breath, testing the night air on his tongue, and froze.

This smell wasn't Gajeel's.

"Who's there?" Laxus demanded, widening his stance to appear as threatening as possible. Golden bolts arced from his body and attacked the ground angrily, "Show yourself."

"Well I must say, your senses have greatly improved since the first time we met Slayer…" a woman stepped from the shadows, all long black hair and fair skin. A lab coat adorned her shoulders and she had a confidence about her Laxus recognized immediately.

"You…" Laxus growled.

"My name is Bianca and I appreciate that you still remember me. It's touching really,"

He growled, his muscles constricting as they readied to attack…

"Nuh uh," she smiled wickedly, pointing up to a nearby tree, "I brought some friends with me and if you want to keep damage to your little Magnolia minimal, you'll keep that attack of yours to yourself."

Laxus grunted, his eyes picking out a handful of men hidden in trees, all with eyes trained on him. Slowly, reluctantly, he dropped is magical energy.

"Good boy," she smiled, "I have to say, I'm extremely impressed your red-eyed friend survived our last encounter. He was pretty banged up from the… hm… treatment, you gave him. Although, I have to say I was slightly disappointed. I was hoping you'd kill him."

"The hell are you talking about?" Laxus gritted his teeth, clenching his fists to the point his knuckles were white.

"Oh, lovely, don't you remember? It was quite marvelous to watch," her wicked smile widened even more, "I know quite a few people in the market for something like that. Sick twisted people, but large buyers nonetheless."

"You have sick fucks who want to watch someone die?" Laxus growled, desperately trying to keep his magic at bay.

"Not so much that…" she quirked her head to the side, "You seriously don't remember do you? Isn't that hilarious! Heh heh heh… well, it's definately interesting…"

Laxus was so utterly through with the ambiguous answers. Everyone knew. _Everyone_. Including the deranged woman that had caused everything in the first place. It was everything he could do to keep from letting out a roar and just tackling her to the ground, allowing his fists to figure out the answer. But her armed guard had their sights on Magnolia and he couldn't bring himself to cause innocents harm in his anger. He had to cool down, had to stop the electricity that was lacing down his veins with desperate need to be released on something.

A flick of her wrist sent something small and shining in his direction. His reaction was instant, catching the tiny glass in his clenched fist. He glanced down anxiously at what was resting against his calloused skin. A tiny vile, hardly the length of his thumb, lay in his palm with a strange translucent liquid inside. He steeled his gaze at her, his eyes sparking dangerously.

"What the hell is this?" Laxus growled, the reverberations so low they caused his chest to tremor.

"That little concoction will unlock your darkest memories from the recesses of your mind. You want answers, Slayer?" her coy eyes watched him, taking in his every feature, "Then drink it."

"An why the hell would I do something like that?"

"Because you know well, Slayer, if I wanted to control you I'd already be doing it right now," a grin spread slowly across her features, "I wonder how your reaction will be… or maybe you're one of those sick fucks that would enjoy it?"

She snapped her fingers then and a barrage of magical arrows came soaring after him. He dodged out of the way flawlessly; turning angrily to attack only to find where she and her guard had been was completely devoid of life. She was completely gone. Not even her scent remained to taint the air. There was no evidence she had even been there.

Cautiously, he looked down at the tiny vial in his hands. His stomach twisted as curiosity and dread both tried to pull his insides apart. The answer to all of his questions was resting in his large fingers, looking so innocent as if it wasn't just held by a witch who'd ruined countless boys' lives and caused him to commit some act on Gajeel that he couldn't even mutter.

As he walked home, he couldn't get his heart to quiet.

Finally he had the key.

Now if only he had the balls to drink it.


	17. Chapter 17

_He remembered everything._

Laxus lay in bed, heart pounding, body covered in sweat, his fist clutched above his hammering chest. His body was shaking. Terror, repulsion, disgust, self loathing, and so many other feelings made him want to vomit all over the floor. He felt like he needed to wash himself, to scrub his skin so hard it would melt from his body. Maybe if he did that he could emerge from the steam a new person, a man who hadn't committed the atrocities he had. A man who hadn't ignored Gajeel's screams for mercy, who hadn't forced sex on him, who hadn't left him to die when he'd gotten his way.

He hated himself. He truly despised himself. He was the worst type of monster.

 _"Can he even control himself?"_

Natsu's words echoed in his head and joined the sick bunch in the pit of his stomach.

 _"Him taking advantage of you wasn't enough?"_

He was going to say it and Gajeel wouldn't let him, had silenced him before the words had exited his mouth.

Laxus curled into a ball on the bed. He couldn't feel angry or enraged. He didn't have it in him to leave the dark confines of his room. Not after last night.

After that witch gave him the damned potion.

He'd gone home and paced the halls for what seemed like hours before he finally said fuck it and downed the bitter liquid. What happened had taken him through the worst lucid dream of his entire life. How did he know it wasn't just that? A dream? Well because it all made sense. That, and the dream didn't fade into short-term memory after his awakening. Dreams, even terrible nightmares, aren't meant to be retained. They're forgotten for the worthless snippets of information and mindless brain firings they are. But this didn't leave. No, if anything when he awoke that morning the images had become so totally clear there was no denying it was real.

He could see it all. He could envision every sordid detail.

He remembered everything.

The feel of his knuckles hitting bone. The rage built into the kick that cracked open the man's skull. The sweet discharge of built up energy that released into Gajeel's perfectly conducted body. And screams. Screams that echoed off of cave walls. Screams of pain. A grown man, a hardened man, a man unafraid of death like Gajeel, begging for him to stop. Begging not to be killed. And then finally, begging not to be penetrated and left shivering on the cold ground.

He couldn't rationalize any of it. There was no excuse. The potion only jumpstarted him into a process that Natsu and Gajeel experienced regularly and yet they weren't out killing people or molesting each other. Even when Gajeel had reacted it was because of the venom. It had contorted his ability to reason and caused his body to react to him when he desperately wanted Laxus to stop.

Laxus lurched up from his bed, his sweaty palms riffling through his hair. He felt like his soul was turning cold and shriveling up into nothing inside of him. He couldn't hate himself enough. He didn't even think throwing himself off of the highest structure in all of Fiore could atone for his sins. And the craziest thing was that Gajeel still associated with him. No, even more. He agreed to teach him to control his new dragon abilities. He'd invited him into his home knowing full and well everything that had happened. He stayed alone with him despite the terrible things he'd done.

 _Maybe he really is into that sick shit…_

As soon as the thought hit him he could have punched himself in the face. He was going crazy. In the darkness of his room he felt like he was going to lose it. He was suffocating in the terrible acts that had consumed him in his fit of rage, the acts that were somehow still following him and impeding his ability to control himself even in the most open of places.

Laxus let out a growl, electricity sparking the walls around him and scorching walls, floor and ceiling. He grabbed his coat and stormed outside, the growing light of the sunrise greeting him as he exited his house. The world didn't care at all about his troubles. It didn't give a shit about the atrocities he'd committed or the pain he'd caused. The sun still brightened the sky as if nothing had ever been amiss. The birds still sang pleasantly and the sleepy town still opened their shutters and doors to the new day. No one thought twice about Laxus as he brooded through the streets, as he walked by the river contemplating whether or not suicide would be the best option for his life at this point. No doubt the world wouldn't care, and in fact, it would probably make life better.

Especially for a certain black-haired mage with molten red eyes.

"Um… Laxus?" a polite, quiet voice made him stop suddenly. He peered to his side, noticing striking blue hair and pale skin immediately, "Juvia couldn't help but notice Laxus seemed upset. Is Laxus ok?"

He didn't answer, only stared at her. Ok? Ok?! He was the farthest from ok he'd ever been in his entire life! Nothing was ok nor would it ever be again! How could he be ok knowing everything that he knew now? How could anyone walk with their head held high after doing such a thing? How could she just stand there, eyes full of innocent naivety and be concerned for his wellbeing? He didn't deserve it! He didn't want it! He should be crawling into a hole where other scumbags like himself end up; somewhere dark and enclosed where they couldn't inflict pain on someone ever again.

And yet there she stood. Did she even know everything? She was Gajeel's closest friend aside from Lily. Surely she knew. But if she did how could she stand to be anywhere near him? She should be at the guild pretending she'd never associated with him in her life. But no, her blue eyes shone up at him in genuine concern. Her lips were puckered slightly in a frown, hands wringing the pink umbrella she never seemed too far away from. Today, she was even sporting a slim dress with a low neckline, a contrast to her usually more conservative dress. She used to always hide her neck until she came to Fairy Tail…

Suddenly, Laxus stopped breathing.

 _"The first and last time I ever didn't go out of town for it, I was still with Phantom Lord."_

Her neck was so extremely pail. It was almost impossible to notice. Time had weathered away what used to be two pronounced scars on the side of her throat, now barely noticeable to the naked eye. And maybe it was his enhanced sight or the fact that the light was shining just perfectly on her porcelain skin, but the two deep scratches seemed to be staring him right in the face. She must have noticed his frown and the direction of his stare because she nervously flipped her hair to cover her neck.

"W-Well… if Laxus is ok then…"

"Juvia," his voice was so quiet compared to its usual strength and security, "How did you get that scar?"

She immediately adverted her eyes from his. A weak smile played at her lips, "J-Juvia doesn't know…"

"Juvia…" she started at his voice, her eyes filling with worry as she looked at him. He sounded the way he felt: broken. His eyes were beseeching hers, silencing the lie she was about to let loose from her lips, "How…?"

Her gaze softened as she looked at him, a sad smile crossing her face, "Juvia promised she'd never talk about it," she drew in a slow breath before composing herself and letting it out. She walked over to the edge of the river and sat down, patting the ground next to her in an invitation and the Lightning Mage quietly accepted, drawing up his knees and not daring to touch the water.

"Juvia was fairly new to Phantom Lord," she watched the water calmly, her voice steady and unafraid. He vaguely thought about how the confession would have seemed more fitting around a campfire, "Gajeel thinks Master Jose might have planned it or was trying to punish Juvia and Gajeel since Juvia had failed a mission earlier that week."

A burning rage suddenly bubbled up and made Laxus cringe. Her own Master had planned something like that? For failing a mission?

"Gajeel had taken Juvia in. He'd worked hard to become an S-Class Mage and didn't want anyone hurting Juvia. When Juvia had failed her mission, Jose was trying to figure out a befitting punishment for Juvia but Gajeel had said she shouldn't be punished. It was the first time Gajeel had ever spoken against Jose and he was very angry.

"Gajeel had locked himself in his dorm for a few days and refused to leave. Juvia was sent to bring him to Jose and wasn't allowed to take no for an answer. When Gajeel wouldn't answer Juvia, she went under the door since Juvia's body can turn into water…."

She shut her eyes for a moment before shaking her head and continuing.

"Gajeel yelled at her from the back room. He'd never said anything like that to Juvia before. She went to find him, not realizing Gajeel was trying to get her to go away for Juvia's safety. Gajeel…" she swallowed audibly and forced a small smile to her face, "Gajeel kept telling Juvia to leave, that he'd deal with Jose himself but Juvia didn't listen. She didn't know Gajeel wasn't himself until he…"

Juvia stopped. Not because she needed to, but because of the Lightning Mage that was pressing his forehead against his knees. She calmly opened her umbrella and held it over him and clouds began to gather in the sky. Laxus was clenching his teeth so hard his ears were ringing.

"I don't understand," he said at last, his voice muffled against his pant leg, "You're still friends? After what he did to you? Why don't you hate him?"

She smiled at him softly then as raindrops began to patter patiently against the soft rose fabric, "Juvia could never hate Gajeel. Gajeel didn't mean to hurt Juvia, he tried to keep Juvia safe. Juvia didn't listen,"

"But that doesn't-"

"When Gajeel snapped out of it, Juvia was still under the effects of the venom," she said quietly, her voice barely louder than the whisper of the rainfall, "If Gajeel was a bad man, he wouldn't have held Juvia still until it went away. If Gajeel was a bad man, he wouldn't have fought Jose and get badly injured for Juvia's honor. If Gajeel was a bad man, he wouldn't have stayed awake for days and stop eating because he was trying to think of anything he could to get Juvia to trust him again. If Gajeel was a bad man, he wouldn't have promised to always keep Juvia safe and never let a man hurt Juvia like that again."

She was silent for a while as the magic-induced rain pattered to a halt and she finally collapsed her umbrella. Timidly, she let her hand rest on Laxus's shoulder, squeezing it gently underneath her pale, slender fingers before taking another breath, "If Laxus was a bad man, he wouldn't be as upset as he is right now."

"So what? Does everyone know what happened? Was I the only one left in the dark?"

"Gajeel only told Juvia because Juvia made him. Juvia knows Gajeel well enough to tell when he's lying to her."

"And Natsu? And Lily?"

"Gajeel won't talk to Lily about it and Lily doesn't mind. He doesn't need to know everything about Gajeel, just like Gajeel doesn't know everything about Lily. Juvia isn't sure how Natsu knows about everything, just that Gajeel says Natsu is too nosy for his own good."

"Sounds about right,"

There was a long pause where the two just stared out at the river. Laxus was still filling with self-loathing. His hands were clenched into fists that mimicked the churning knots still boiling in his stomach. He could hear Juvia's calm breathing, smell the humid and clean scent she carried with her wherever she went. She was beautiful and kind, and in his opinion, too good for Grey and crazy to go after a man who acted like he cared so little about her. But maybe that's why she still chased him, because she realized he was probably the one who needed him the most aside from maybe Gajeel.

And maybe that was why she didn't ostracize him despite his crimes against her.

"Juvia… since you know him so well, will you answer something for me?"

Her blue eyes glistened peacefully and she turned to him with a gentle smile, "Hm?"

"Why did you decide to stay by his side? What could he have possibly done to reconcile himself?"

Juvia's smile wavered slightly, "Juvia isn't really sure. Gajeel is a cruel and mal-tempered man sometimes, and during his darkest times he did some terrible things. But Gajeel stands by his word. He does anything for those he calls his nakama. Juvia guesses she never felt scared of Gajeel, Juvia could believe Gajeel when she couldn't trust anyone. It was hard at first, but Juvia found a way to forgive Gajeel even though Gajeel never tried to be forgiven."

Juvia rose to her feet then, flipping open her umbrella once again, "Juvia thinks Laxus doesn't need to worry about Gajeel forgiving him. Juvia thinks maybe Laxus should worry more about forgiving himself."

He didn't meet her gaze, merely kept staring at the river.

"Juvia thinks Laxus doesn't realize, no matter what he's done, there are a lot of people who would miss Laxus if he were gone."

Laxus turned his head to look at her, wanted to demand how she knew what he'd been contemplating. He wanted to figure out how she'd somehow seen past his private thoughts and silent words. But she was already gone, walking down a sidewalk that was quickly filling with more people. By now the morning was mature and the daily traffic was filling Magnolia.

The familiar voices of Lucy, Natsu, and Happy were approaching. The band cheerfully making their way to the guild. As they started to pass Lucy noticed his presence and waved happily, distracting Natsu from their conversation. Natsu as well smirked at the Lightning Dragon, but not before hiding some sort of emotion that caused his eyes to tighten. Laxus slowly came to his feet and turned in the direction of the guild. As he passed by a nearby shop, he once again caught the voice of the Water Mage.

Instead of alone this time, however, he also heard a familiar gruff tone interrupt her elated babblings.

He just barely caught sight of a raven-haired man with ruby eyes.


	18. Chapter 18

"Hurry the hell up, Juvia. I have things to do."

"But Juvia can't decide! Gajeel was supposed to help Juvia but he's done nothing but make everything worse!"

"I said you looked fine, didn't I?" Gajeel growled from his perch on Juvia's couch, chewing on some iron filings as the blue-haired woman threw yet another dress onto the floor. How many had that been? Ten? Eleven? Hell it could have been more for all he knew. He'd told her time and time again that she looked nice, pretty even, but the strikingly pale woman didn't seem to hear him as she threw another piece of clothing over her shoulders to shimmy over her hips.

"Juvia needs to look better than fine! She's going to get Grey's attention on their date! She has to look perfect!"

Gajeel bit back a snort. He didn't want to mention that their date also happened to be with Natsu, Lucy, Erza, and Happy… and was just dinner with a group of friends… and he was probably barely going to speak to her as always…

He just rolled his eyes as she turned in front of her mirror, looking herself up and down, putting her hands on her waist, crossed them in front of her, fluffed her hair, and then sighed emphatically. She cast her gaze to him, pale blue eyes asking the question he still didn't want to answer.

He hooked together two pieces of metal and twisted them together, creating a tiny, intricate spiral, "I liked the other one better."

"Which other one? There's over a dozen here!"

"The purple one."

"Juvia doesn't have a purple dress! Gajeel hasn't been paying any attention at all!" she whimpered, snatching another dress from the closet, "If Gajeel isn't going to help then he might as well go home!"

He glanced over at her.

"You know he doesn't give a shit about what you wear, right? The dumbass barely wears clothes himself."

"I thought Juvia said Gajeel should just go home!" she fumed, crossing her arms and glaring at him through her azure locks. He huffed at her and continued wrapping iron pieces together, "Besides, what would Gajeel know about relationships? He's never been in love before."

"It doesn't take a genius to figure out he's an idiot," he quipped back, eyeing her mischievously. The woman was a hopeless romantic, "Besides, love doesn't really have anything to do with picking out a fucking dress."

She smoldered silently, ignoring his comments as she continued looking through her clothes.

Gajeel kept twisting iron, tiny green sparks warping the metal as he wished. He had to keep his hands busy lately, his mind having been wandering places it wasn't welcome. He could feel it building in his stomach every once in a while, a need that was terribly carnal and demanding. As long as he kept active, made sure his mind and hands were always worrying over things, he wouldn't let it distract him. But every once in a while it would sneak up on him, cause a shiver to run down his spine and his eyes to wander places they shouldn't.

Juvia spun around in a tight fitting light blue dress. She looked herself up and down, smiled bashfully and tucked a stray hair behind her ear. The way her head was tilted her waves fell over one shoulder, allowing the shockingly white skin of her neck show. His ruby eyes fell on her, sweeping just once over her figure. She was actually very beautiful. Grey _was_ and idiot. Juvia practically threw herself at him and yet he turned a blind eye to her.

She must have decided she didn't want this dress either because she began gathering up the hem in between her fingers, was drawing it above porcelain knees and lush thighs. He felt a sudden heat flush through his torso, make a sudden drive for his groin. For an instant his spine went straight and his muscles jumped into action. His hands balled into fists and he swallowed audibly.

He forced his eyes down to scowl at his intricate work and held his breath. He focused on each delicate link. So small and detail oriented was his work that he couldn't lose concentration. He made a goal to set five of the tiny ringlets before he let himself breathe again… four… three… two… one…

He let out a slow breath. His heart had slowed its pace once again; the striking heat had eased away. He wasn't looking at the Water Mage, didn't pay attention to the cautious look she was shooting his way. They'd been friends for a very long time and had seen each other at their worst. No one understood Gajeel like Juvia did, not even Lily. She could tell immediately what was going on and slowly closed the door to her closet as she changed once again.

Even from where Gajeel was sitting he could smell her apprehension. It made his stomach knot angrily and he stopped to rub his forehead.

"Gajeel hasn't talked about Laxus in a while," Juvia's voice broke the tense silence and it startled him. His bloody eyes snapped up at her door and he glared at the wood as if it had been what had spoken the words, "Is he doing better?"

"Hell if I know," Gajeel growled, "I'd rather keep my distance."

"I thought Gajeel and Laxus liked each other?"

He resisted the urge to laugh out loud, "Gajeel and Laxus can't stand each other, Juvia. Why the hell would that have changed?"

Juvia emerged in her usual blue outfit, boots pulled up to her thighs and arms and neck covered. She crossed her arms and stood before him, her lips pursed as if she were going to say something but didn't want to. He could tell it was something that made her uncomfortable just by how she was standing. He was already dreading whatever the words were.

"What?" his voice was low and cautious, as if someone in the next room could hear his words.

"Juvia thought Gajeel had been helping Laxus?"

"Not anymore. All it does is end me up…" he trailed off, his cheeks suddenly feeling warmer. Juvia raised an eyebrow at him, "Nevermind."

"Juvia talked to Laxus yesterday."

"…why?" Gajeel suddenly felt apprehensive.

"He seemed very upset. Like he wanted to do something bad to himself."

Gajeel gritted his teeth, "He'll get the hell over it. Just give him a couple days."

"He asked Juvia how she got her scar."

Gajeel froze. His eyes to her neck then, neatly covered by the high collar of her dress. It had taken her coming to Fairy Tail before she finally let her skin show, so self conscious of the blemish and memory behind it that she hid it from everyone at Phantom Lord. But the kindness and accepting nature of the rowdy guild had brought out the self-confidence to show the world her pale skin and she'd been so much happier for it. Gajeel hadn't thought too much about it when she had started wearing her high collared dresses again, but now he felt stupid for not noticing.

"What did you say?" he was looking down at his hands again, weaving in and out, in and out, an intricate little chain forming in his hands. He tried to act like it didn't faze him, like what had happened so many years ago no longer bothered him, but his voice came out smaller than he had wanted it to. He felt like the nauseous feeling in his gut was going to slowly eat him alive.

"Juvia told him the truth."

Gajeel bit the inside of his cheek until he tasted iron. He didn't look up at her, just kept working on, trying to convince himself that he shouldn't be feeling how he was. He shouldn't want the earth to suddenly swallow him alive. If Juvia was willing to talk about it to someone, then clearly she had come to terms and moved on. Actually, he knew she had. She had done so a long time ago.

He hadn't.

"Laxus remembers what happened,"

Her voice was full of concern and remorse and so many things that Gajeel didn't want to think about.

"Juvia thinks maybe Gajeel needs to talk to him."

"I ain't having anything to do with him. Maybe the bastard will finally leave me alone."

"Juvia thinks Gajeel is being overly cruel."

"Yeah?" he made eye contact with her then. She was standing in front of him, arms crossed, a disappointed look in her pale eyes, "Why the hell should I care?"

"How did Gajeel feel, when it was him in Laxus's place?"

Gajeel felt a harsh pang run through his heart. He remembered it so vividly. Juvia came into his room, eyes worried and innocent and having no idea why he was hurling insults at her as if she'd just killed his best friend. He remembered how she had screamed when he came after her, silver scales glittering in the dim light and angry hands grabbing her wrists while she tried to get away from him.

He shut his eyes against the images he was seeing, the angry remorse making his stomach roll dangerously. Just thinking about it made him want to throw up all over again. He wanted to scratch the experience out of his mind forever. He would have rather lived in blissful ignorance than relive the gnawing guilt whenever he saw nervous tension in Juvia's blue eyes.

That's why he stayed so close to her side. He'd do anything for her. He'd fought for her honor against Jose and anyone in his way, he'd raged against anyone who raised a hand against her, tore down any man that dared look at her in a way that made her uncomfortable, followed her to Fairy Tail despite all of his reservations, and here he sat helping her sift through frilly dresses when he would rather be anywhere else. She knew it, that a deep hate for himself still broiled just under the surface. She had tried time and time again to make him forgive himself. She'd forced him to stop fighting, to take care of himself, to feign recovery from the memory of her…

He felt a gentle hand on his shoulder that interrupted his increasingly dark thoughts. She was smiling calmly down at him, no fear in her eyes and nothing but that innocent, hopeless romantic, everything-is-going-to-be-ok look on her face.

"Maybe Gajeel should let Laxus know he's not the only one who has trouble with his Dragon Instincts?"

He felt heat rising to his cheeks and he brushed off her hand, "If you talked to him he already knows. Besides, I doubt he'd want to go anywhere with me anyway."

Juvia's brows pulled together in a confused expression and she took a step away from him, "Why would Laxus have to go anywhere with Gajeel? All Gajeel would have to do is talk to him…"

Embarrassment etched itself so clearly across Gajeel's face that Juvia stopped in her tracks. Realization hit her face and rosy blush suddenly covered her cheeks as well.

"G-Gajeel wants to…?" 

"Stop it right there, Rain Woman!"

She looked down at her hands, the words falling from her mouth as she quickly processed what Gajeel had just let slip, "Gajeel will have to leave town soon and he wants to take Laxus with him? Gajeel wouldn't take anyone with him unless...!"

Gajeel's red eyes were fiery and he stopped her from continuing the train of thought, "That's not what I meant!"

She eyed him knowingly, a scandalous smile coming to her face, "Gajeel is in love…?!"

"You know it doesn't have to work like that!"

"So Gajeel has strong feelings for Laxus? Like what?" she was pressing close to him, her eyes excited.

"I fucking hate him! Ain't that strong enough?!" he snarled down at her, "Now shut the hell up and wipe that smirk off your face!"

"Is this the Boy Love that Erza was talking about? How does that work? You're both men…?"

Gajeel didn't think his face could have possibly gotten hotter, it was so intense the tips of his ears and his neck were also burning, "Juvia!"

She suddenly gasped, her hands springing to her lips and she looked him up and down, "Laxus is so strong! Gajeel! Does that mean you were the beta…?"

"What the hell are you? Why would you want to know that?!"

"Maybe Juvia should be helping Gajeel pick out something to wear," she smiled at him cheekily.

"That's it, I'm leaving." Gajeel snarled, grabbing his jacket from the couch and headed pointedly for the door. Juvia rushed over, all giggles like she had just been talking about crushes at a sleepover.

"Juvia will stop! Juvia will stop! Gajeel doesn't have to go, Juvia will stop!"

He eyed her angrily before resigning back to his perch on the couch, this time twisting the metal pieces much more ferociously. She stood back in her closet doorway, crossing her arms as she surveyed. She spoke again, this time her voice much calmer, much more serious.

"What did happen, Gajeel?" her light blue eyes didn't meet his, "Gajeel was very hurt when he came back from his mission with Laxus. Maybe it's not such a good idea to meet him?"

"It was a little different on the mission…"

"What does Gajeel mean? Juvia is confused."

He sighed, daring to shoot her a look. She was wringing her hands together, obviously uncomfortable, "I saw myself having this conversation with Laxus and Wendy, not you," she blushed and didn't say anything, staring at herself intently in the mirror instead of looking at him. He surrendered his reluctance. She'd gone through it. Maybe she had a right to better understand it?

"I barely understand it myself, how am I supposed to…?" she glanced over to him, obviously surprised he was actually talking about this with her, "It's uncomfortable. You think about things you don't want to – well not even that – things you know you shouldn't, like having sex with just about anything with a skirt. Generally, it's only guys that become super aggressive. It's like adrenaline, it drives you crazy. You just need to…" he felt that damned warmth crawling up the nape of his neck again. This time he wasn't just embarrassed though, "…it's not just sex. It's fighting. Or just being destructive."

"Laxus attacked you?"

"Well it's not usually that bad. He was injured; we had been running for our lives all day. He was angry and didn't understand what was happening to him. He'd never been through it before. This is something that happens when you're younger and already going through other changes. He's a grown man and it's not exactly pleasant to feel that way unless…" he stopped, realizing just who he was talking to and that she was currently covering her face and blushing so hard he could almost feel it from across the room, " _anyway_ , I didn't want to fight 'em. That would just make things worse, because then he'd want to fight me even more. I tried to just let him do whatever he wanted, if it would calm him down. But it didn't, he just got even angrier. Honestly, I thought he was going to kill me so I… why am I explaining this again?"

"Gajeel doesn't have to, if it makes him upset."

"I ain't upset," he growled, not convincing either of them, "I showed him a different way to let out his energy."

He tasted every syllable as he spoke it, just thinking about it making a shiver try to break out along his skin. He took back to making loops with metal again, distracting himself before Juvia could notice what was going on with him. He ran his tongue against his canines, feeling the sharpness against his muscle. He needed to calm down before he did something stupid.

"G-Gajeel started it?" she gushed, "Gajeel _does_ love Laxus!"

"You're fucking crazy," he was too busy trying to keep himself composed to argue with her, "It wasn't exactly my fault. He bit me."

She was quiet again, her demeanor once again serious, "Why doesn't Gajeel explain all this to Laxus? He's very upset…"

He bit the inside of his cheek again, "Whenever I'm around him… things happen. I doubt I'd be explaining anything if I got him alone to talk to him,"

She was suddenly in front of him, large icy eyes just inches from his face and full of shock, "Gajeel and Laxus… have been _alone_?"

"Would you stay on track for two seconds?!"

"Juvia never thought Gajeel would end up with Laxus!" she gushed, "Gajeel needs to help Laxus control his Dragon Instincts! Juvia will aid by convincing Laxus he needs to go on a mission in the area Gajeel will be camping! Laxus will stumble on Gajeel in the woods and have a romantic rendezvous beneath the stars! Then Gajeel and Laxus can come back to the guild together and proclaim their love for each other and…!"

She was off, her voice excited as she wove this strange fairytale pairing as if she were writing a sappy romance novel. Gajeel finished the chain while she ranted and walked over to her vanity, grabbing a bright sapphire pendant that was lying alone on the desk. He quickly fashioned it together and walked past her to her closet, fishing through the fabrics for a certain dress he'd seen her in a few months ago. It was so deep navy blue that in dim light it looked almost black. The strands of silk were so fine that it almost looked iridescent under the light. It was sleeveless and flowed almost to the ground, even as tall as the Rain Woman was.

She halted her speech when he approached her again, laying the hanger over her shoulder and bringing the intricate necklace up to her pale skin. He clasped it around her neck, and let her hair fall around it to frame her face.

"There, ya romantic idiot," he let a smile curl up the side of his face at his handy work, "Yer gonna be late for your date."

"Where is Gajeel going?" she inquired after him as he grabbed his coat and started for the door.

"I told you, I have shit to do. I'm leaving town in a couple days."

"If Juvia doesn't see Gajeel before he leaves, be safe."

"Yeah, yeah," he waved at her over his shoulder as he vanished out the door.


	19. Chapter 19

Laxus was looking into his drink intensely. Mirajane was talking beside him but he wasn't really paying attention. He'd just gotten back to Magnolia just that morning and he was tired. He was just starting to think about paying his tab and leaving early when the heavy doors to the hall opened. In strode Gajeel, his hands fiddling with something as he walked, his ruby eyes trained on his work. Laxus tried to make out what it was but couldn't quite. He thought it might be a chain of some sort…?

"Why are you so insistent on ignoring me?" Lily was fussing angrily behind him.

"Why are you so insistent on annoying the hell out of me?" Gajeel growled, finally lifting his eyes from his craft to look back at the tiny Exceed, "I told ya, I'll be back in about a week. I'll fix it then."

"What do you need fixed?" Mira piped up, gaining the attention from the two squabbling men, "It sounds important if Lily is so upset."

"It's a side table," Lily scolded, "And it doesn't have to be fixed absolutely _now_ but he's the one who broke it this morning and he's leaving me with the mess! Can't postpone his stupid trip for another day…"

"What are you, my fucking wife? Shut the hell up already!" Gajeel snapped, turning on Lily and snarling at him. Both Lily and Mira looked at him wide-eyed. Laxus's brow furrowed.

"What the hell is your problem?" Laxus growled, standing. He didn't usually get involved in stupid fights but something about how aggressive Gajeel was being made him want to snap him the hell out of it. Gajeel's bloody eyes swept over to him, reflecting bellicosity in his glare. A low growl reverberated in his chest as he stared up at the blonde and he clenched his hands so tightly the chain in his fist snapped and fell to the ground.

The sound drew Gajeel's attention to where it fell. His movement was slow and mechanical as he reached down to pick it up, when he straightened Laxus noticed him take a deep breath and purposefully let it out again. The strange behavior made all of them exchange a look as tight red eyes reopened and he started fishing money from his pocket.

"I'll fix it when I'm back in a week. If it bothers you that much, buy a new one," his voice sounded only barely restrained as he gave a handful of Jewels to Mira and then a separate handful to Lily. Lily opened his mouth to protest but a swift look told him to just accept the money and so he flew quietly away.

Laxus crossed his arms and glared at the Dragon Slayer as Mira went to the back to retrieve something. Gajeel was back to work with whatever was in his hands, masterfully fixing the warped metal and then continuing its length. Laxus started to notice an aroma in the air around the Iron Mage, one that was terribly familiar and made mixed feelings suddenly race through his chest. His golden eyes squinted at him as he tried to process what it was.

Why was it so familiar…?

"Here you go," Mira laid down a large pack of iron pieces in front of Gajeel who in turn scooped it up and threw it over his shoulder. He mumbled a quick thank you before turning on his heel and heading for the door.

Laxus suddenly reacted, grabbing his arm to stop his retreat. The two stayed frozen like that for a moment, Laxus wondering why he'd just stopped the other Slayer and trying to figure out something to say, and Gajeel refusing to turn around. Mira marveled at the strange exchange, equally as confused with what was going on. Gajeel finally turned his head back to look at Laxus and did something that only fanned Laxus's confusion.

His eyes started from the bottoms of Laxus's boots and slowly dredged themselves up his legs, his hips, to his chest, and then finally rested on Laxus's face. Two very conflicting things reflected in his critical stare and a slow, wicked smile worked its way across his features.

"I'd recommend you not follow me…" his voice was so low that Laxus was sure only he could hear it, but all the same it sent a tremor down his spine and a quick flash of heat to his core, "…if you know what's good for you."

With a strange grace and deliberateness, he took hold of Laxus's wrist and lifted it from his arm. He flipped his arm over so that his palm was facing the sky and pushed his thumb against the vein there, stifling his pulse until it was almost painful. All the while, rubicund irises bore into him intensely, not allowing him to move his gaze. His smile widened to the point that glistening white teeth started to show. Laxus suddenly noticed Gajeel's canines gleaming at him threateningly, and his smile only grew even more at Laxus's reaction.

"Your heart is beating pretty fast… do I make you nervous?" Laxus's eyes widened as Gajeel leaned closer to him, red eyes flashing roguishly. His voice dropped to a mere whisper, "In what way, I wonder?"

Laxus snatched his hand back, "The hell is wrong with you?"

His demeanor shifted into more annoyance than the wickedness from before. He dropped his eyes back to the chain in his hand. It was small and delicate looking, like something that would hold a gem for a necklace. Gajeel immediately started working on it again, his brows furrowing as he concentrated.

"Sorry," he mumbled, green magic beginning to swirl from his fingers, "I'm not feeling myself."

He turned and began to walk away, "If you're not feeling well, should you be going out alone?"

Laxus didn't know why, but he felt a little concerned.

Gajeel once again peeked over his shoulder, his wicked gleam returning to his eyes, "If you're that worried, Sparky, you could always check on me."

Before Laxus could say anything he flipped his black locks over his shoulder dismissively and quickly strode away, letting the doors slam hard behind him. Laxus looked back over at Mira who shook her head. He walked back to the bar and she poured him another drink as he settled back in.

"What did he say to you?" she prodded, her eyes filled to the brim with curiosity, "Even with my Demon hearing I couldn't understand what he was saying."

Laxus took a sip of his beer, deciding not to tell her everything he'd said. Mira usually had good intentions but she was also a gossip. He wasn't sure if Gajeel would want everyone knowing what he said, especially if he'd lowered his voice purposely so only Laxus could hear. But why…?

"He said he wasn't feeling himself," he finally spoke, his intrigue growing the more the thought about the exchange. Did Gajeel _want_ him to follow? But every time they'd been alone together things that neither of them wanted seemed to occur. Unless Gajeel _did_ actually want to…

"Laxus! Are you listening to me at all?" Mira's frustrated voice brought him back. He blinked at her blankly and she gave an exasperated sigh, "I said he gets this way every once in a while. You shouldn't worry too much."

"Did he say where he was going?" Laxus blurted out the words before he could think of the consequences. Mira eyed him for a moment before finally speaking.

"He didn't. Not to me anyway. Why don't you ask Juvia or Lily? They'll probably know," she eyed him suspiciously, "Since when did you care so much about Gajeel?"

"You mean the fact he was acting so strange didn't put you off?" Laxus grumbled, packing up his things.

Mira squinted at him slyly, "Laxus… is there something you're not telling me?"

"To be fair, Mira, there's a lot I don't tell you," Laxus grinned just as wickedly at her before heading out the doors.


	20. Chapter 20

**ADULT THEMES AND GRAPHIC SCENES AHEAD:**

 **THIS IS GOING TO BE AN EXTREMELY GRAPHIC FANFICTION. IT IS NOT INTENDED FOR IMMATURE AUDIENCES AND MAY CONTAIN TRIGGERS FOR SOME READERS. IT IS YOUR RESPONSIBILITY AS A READER TO KEEP THIS IN MIND FOR THE FUTURE. I WILL REPOST THIS DISCLAIMER AT THE BEGINNING OF EVERY CHAPTER WITH GRAPHIC CONTENT. I WILL DO MY BEST TO ENSURE THAT IF YOU SKIP THE CHAPTER THAT YOU WILL NOT LOSE ANY OF THE EXPERIENCE.**

 **PLEASE BE KIND AND CONSIDERATE WHEN READING. CRITIQUE IS ENCOURAGED BUT RUDENESS WILL NOT BE TOLERATED.**

 **THANK YOU FOR READING. I HOPE YOU ENJOY.**

Laxus was, despite his better judgment, standing just outside of the small town Camellia. He had a small bag with enough supplies for about two weeks slung over his shoulder, although he really doubted he'd need it. He quietly adjusted his headphones as he walked through town. His furred coat billowed out behind him in the wind and he barely took notice from the stares of passersby. No doubt this place was remote enough that visitors rarely frequented this area.

But it wasn't the tiny settlement he was here for, but the mountains that broke through the earth headed for the sky. It didn't take much to realize why this place was so remote. Although the forests were lush with ash and spruce, the wildlife was lacking and most food had to be outsourced. Besides being known for it's abundance of birds, the area was actually quite desolate as far as living creatures went. Hunting was rare as only a few types of squirrels, rabbits, and deer frequented the area. There weren't any shops as most of the shopping was done from the next town over, and inns were scarce. This was mostly a logging town, and it was off-season.

And the reason he was here was just on the other side of the mountain, along a path rarely traversed, on a side of the slopes that hadn't been yet touched by loggers or hikers.

Laxus traversed the tiny town, asking here and there for the correct direction to go, before finally steeling himself and heading in to the dark forest.

Juvia couldn't have been more confusing when he'd talked to her. A conversation that Laxus felt should have been extremely brief ended up turning into much more than he bargained for. Her pale cheeks had flushed a deep crimson when he asked her where Gajeel was headed, didn't seem worried in the least bit that he'd been acting strangely. In fact, she seemed to know a lot more than she was letting on and he briefly wondered if that should worry him or not. At first she tried to dissuade him from following him, and then after a while had started babbling nonstop. He didn't understand most of what she said.

Something about declaring his love?

He ran his fingers through his hair as he traversed the rocky landscape. There was hardly any grass. Most of the plant life consisted of strange, prickly ferns that tugged at his trousers as he walked. It was gorgeous though. The trees were thick despite the dry ground and the sun filtered through the trees to speckle the ground with light. The travelling was rough, though, and he often found himself having to climb up steep slopes to continue on his path.

How did Gajeel even find this place?

He set his thoughts aside as he approached a sheer face. He inclined his neck back to gage the distance, looked to either side to try and find a different way. He crouched, his legs tensing as he estimated how far he'd have to get to the top of the ridge. In a quick-as-light explosion of electricity, he leapt into the air, letting the lightning bolt carry him into the air. The static filled his entire being, exhilarated him as he passed the top of the crest and landed lightly on his feet. He looked down.

He could see the trees rolling like waves, sloping into a low valley in the middle of the four mountains. This was it, his point of no return. Now was the time to decide whether or not he was really going to do this.

 _"You could always come and check on me,"_

He could envision the sly smile that had curled up the side of his face; those poignant, ruby eyes staring up at him in a way that was equally foreign and familiar. He had the sense that he was playing with fire, that he should just turn around and go home now. This whole thing was going to backfire he just knew it.

Only one valid possibility had come to his mind when he'd decided to set out after the Iron Mage.

He shook the idea out of his head quickly.

If that were the case, he'd turn tail and run the opposite direction. He was just here to make sure the infuriating man was alright. Nothing more. And if he was he would leave. That was all.

He had a strange nervousness broiling in his stomach that made him hesitate just before jumping down. He set his jaw, gripped his jacket over his shoulders, and jumped. Using his lightning magic once again, he zipped down the ridge into the valley, his eyes quickly adjusting to the change in light.

It was much darker here. The mountains surrounding did well to block most of the sunlight and what they didn't block the even denser trees did their best to consume. For a minute, Laxus just stood in the dim shadows, as much in no hurry to move as he was completely at a loss for direction. If he were to look for an angry Gajeel Redfox, where would he go?

He tipped his head back and closed his eyes. He breathed deeply through his nose and out his mouth, tasting the air like an animal. He listened intently as he inhaled, the silence around him consuming him. He couldn't smell anything. No faint scent of iron or trace or Dragon Slayer magic. Nothing but the invasive smells of the forest greeted him. He was contemplating just turning around and leaving, thinking briefly that maybe he'd gone to the wrong place or Juvia had just steered him wrong, when he suddenly realized just how silent it was in this part of the wood.

The wind shifted, coming at him from the completely opposite direction as before. With it, came a scent that crashed into him like a train. His golden eyes widened and a smoldering fire ignited in his core in reaction to it. He clenched his fists, turned on his heel to begin his flight. He was desperately trying to ignore the feeling that was screaming for him to seek out the source of the enticing scent, to find it and subdue it to his will. He wanted to fight, a tremor slipping down his spine in reaction to the intense feeling. But he wouldn't, _refused_ to let this happen again. He had rational thought, so he could leave. _Now._

A branch snapping in the foliage made him hesitate for just an instant before he felt hands on him, gripping his collar and crashing him in a tree. His head hit the bark hard, momentarily causing stars to fill his vision. He blinked wildly, letting out a threatening growl as he held onto a corded forearm. Familiar laughter had him opening his eyes to blood red irises.

Gajeel was holding his entire weight in one hand against the tree; eyes alight with wicked mischief as he looked up at the blonde. A wide grin was set on his features and his hair was even more a disheveled mess than usual. But what had Laxus's heart beating so frantically wasn't the wild look in Gajeel's eyes or the way his silver scales were glittering in the subdued light, it was the overpowering scent of the man. He recognized it but never had it been so full of need. He'd encountered it on stage, in the man's house, and even in the bathhouse, but never had it caused the reaction in the veins that was happening now.

"Well, well," Gajeel chuckled darkly, his teeth gleaming up at him, "And here I thought I was going to spend this long week alone."

"Gajeel…" Laxus started but Gajeel dropped him, letting him land hard on the ground. He squatted down until he was almost eye-level with the Lightning Mage, his cunning smile quickening his pulse to a whole new level, "I…"

"Just came to check on me, hmm?" his canines looked impossibly sharp as he ran the tip of his tongue against them, his ebony locks spiking down his shoulder. He reached a red-gloved hand out to grip Laxus's chin harshly, tipping his head at a compromising angle, "Is that all you came to do?"

"Gajeel let go!" Laxus snapped, his electricity sparking around them, threatening to snap at the wild Dragon Slayer. He went to slap his hand away but Gajeel took his free hand and gripped his wrist, twisting it to a painful angle that caused him to grit his teeth. He suddenly felt completely powerless, something he didn't take lightly.

A growl weaved through the Raven Haired Mage's lips, silencing his struggle, "Why would I do that? I like you this way," he twisted until Laxus's wrist popped dangerously and the man grunted against the pain, his lightning ceasing as the pain threatened to travel up his forearm, "Not a very fun place to be, is it?"

"Just fucking let me go," Laxus seethed.

"So what? You can finally give me some goddamn peace and quiet?" Gajeels face lowered until his lips barely brushed porcelain skin, "It's a little late for that…"

His tongue went flush against Laxus's jugular, trailing like a line of fire up his throat to his jawline. He nipped at his flesh, listening intently to the hiss that escaped the man's lips. A malicious laugh bubbled from Gajeel's chest.

"Look at that, I ain't even bit you yet and you're already nice and sensitive," a rough hand gripped Laxus's thigh, pushing the tip of it's thumb greedily against the inside of his leg, "I like it."

A shiver ran down Laxus's spine and he tried to struggle from him. Gajeel only twisted his wrist farther causing pain to sear up to Laxus's elbow and making it apparent that Gajeel didn't care if he broke his wrist or not. He pulled his arm up and pressed it against the tree, forcing Laxus to arch his back to try to relieve the tension. But as he did that, Gajeel dropped his knees on either side of him, sitting astride his waist. The hand that had been gripping his thigh he turned into a pointed talon, running the sharp claw up to the bottom of his shirt, pressing it threateningly into his skin. It travelled up his navel, over each ridge of his abs, and up his chest until he completely sliced through his violet shirt, a thin red line travelling up his entire front until it ceased just under his jaw.

Laxus hissed at the pain from his wrist, from the scratch that just barely marred his flesh. It hadn't been enough to break the skin, only enough to leave an angry red scrape up his skin. Laxus had never liked sharp pains and he didn't like the way Gajeel grinned down at him from his perch on the Lightning Mage's hips.

"What's the matter, princess? Don't like a little pain?"

"What the hell did you just call me?" Laxus growled up at him.

Gajeel just smirked, "I kinda like that face on you. Show me again."

"The hell I will," Laxus clenched his teeth defiantly. Who the hell did he think he was?

Gajeel's face dipped incredibly close to his, his free hand intertwining into his locks and pulling his head back to the point of discomfort. He felt his tongue again, this time closely followed by fangs threatening his skin. A tremor started from where Gajeel's lips connected with Laxus's skin and rushed to his loins, bunching his stomach and making a stray moan escape his lips. He could feel Gajeel's smile pressing against his neck, a warm kiss that made it's way down his clavicle.

Laxus could feel his member hardening, was trying to calm himself against it. But Gajeel could feel the tension against his pants, sensed the discomfort from the man below him. He brought his hand down to cup the growing bulge, pressing a thumb harshly against thick fabric. Laxus couldn't retreat although he pressed closer to the trunk of the tree behind him, eliciting a chuckle from the male above him.

"As much as you took advantage of me and you're suddenly so shy," Gajeel grinned down at him, causing blush to rise to the Lightning Mage's cheeks, "If I were a better man, I'd just bite you now and let you use that as an excuse for what's happening to you right now," Laxus's stomach rolled nervously under the hungry, bloody gaze that was obviously stripping him with its critical look, "But you've pissed me off."

He pressed Laxus's erection even harder, causing him to gasp and arch his back against the pressure.

"So I won't let you have an excuse," Laxus felt the other man's breath hot against his earlobe as his voice dropped to a tantalizing whisper, "You're going to moan my name, Laxus Dreyer, before I even let you taste a drop of venom."


	21. Chapter 21

**ADULT THEMES AND GRAPHIC SCENES AHEAD:**

 **THIS IS GOING TO BE AN EXTREMELY GRAPHIC FANFICTION. IT IS NOT INTENDED FOR IMMATURE AUDIENCES AND MAY CONTAIN TRIGGERS FOR SOME READERS. IT IS YOUR RESPONSIBILITY AS A READER TO KEEP THIS IN MIND FOR THE FUTURE. I WILL REPOST THIS DISCLAIMER AT THE BEGINNING OF EVERY CHAPTER WITH GRAPHIC CONTENT. I WILL DO MY BEST TO ENSURE THAT IF YOU SKIP THE CHAPTER THAT YOU WILL NOT LOSE ANY OF THE EXPERIENCE.**

 **PLEASE BE KIND AND CONSIDERATE WHEN READING. CRITIQUE IS ENCOURAGED BUT RUDENESS WILL NOT BE TOLERATED.**

 **THANK YOU FOR READING. I HOPE YOU ENJOY.**

Gajeel straightened and dodged away, sensing the static filling the air before lightning consumed Laxus. Laxus zipped through the trees, faster than even Jet with his Speed Magic. Laxus bit his lip against the need, against the heat flooding through him. God he wanted the raven-haired man but he wasn't going to do this again. Gajeel wasn't in his right mind. He going to let his desires carry him away. He refused to allow it, wasn't going to force himself on Gajeel again.

 _But he wants it_ …

Laxus stopped breathless, his muscles sore from the sudden release of Magic. He couldn't hear him, couldn't smell the mind-twisting scent of the man that drove him absolutely insane. He got away. He was fine.

That was until he realized he had no fucking idea where he was.

And he'd gone the complete opposite direction of escape.

Quick footprints in the brush made his heart seize. He spun around, golden eyes darting into the foliage. Goddamn, he had never been good with stealth but Gajeel was a master. He blended into the shadows in a way that was almost enigmatic. He heard the footsteps to his left, the snap of a twig to his right, the playful growl from somewhere behind. He was being stalked by glittering red eyes and he hated it, hated how it caused his stomach to bunch and his heart to leap to his throat.

 _Fear of what?_

"Goddamn it Gajeel! Fucking face me like a man!" Laxus roared out, rage summoning lightning down from the sky.

Shit. This was exactly what he _didn't_ want to do. He didn't come here to fight. He didn't come here to fuck. So… what had he come there for?

"Do you like it rough, Sparky?" Gajeel was on him in an instant, an iron blade that was his arm suddenly pressing against his neck. A sadistic grin was curled on the Iron Mage's face, fangs flashing dangerously, "Because I do."

Laxus reacted, summoning a bolt of lightning down on the Dragon Slayer. But Gajeel dodged, almost as light as air on his feet, and feigned a tumble into the arms of the Lightning Dragon. Laxus caught him, concern rising when he saw a grimace come to the other man's face. They tangled legs, tumbled down onto the ground and Laxus turned so Gajeel landed on top of him.

"Shit!" Laxus's breath was knocked from his lungs but the smaller man didn't move, his raven locks had fallen over his face and his cheek was pressed against Laxus's hip. He didn't move and for a second and Laxus didn't breathe, "Dammit, I barely even-"

Bloody eyes tilted back in an instant and suddenly hungry, dominating lips were attacking his own. Fingers knotted into blonde hair and pulled Laxus's head to an angle that pleased the Iron-covered man. Gajeel sighed into his mouth, tongue darting out to slide against Laxus's and a strong hand pressed roughly to Laxus's erection, causing a grunt to escape from his lips.

He could tell Gajeel relished it.

He pressed harder, stroking against the fabric. Laxus couldn't stand the smell that was filling his lungs nor the heat bunching down in his groin; the need filled him with such carnal desires it almost made him shake. Gajeel was moving masterfully, as if he knew exactly how to get Laxus off, and dear _god_ was he getting close. He gripped Gajeel's hips, felt the man above him grind his erection against his thigh. A gloved hand slipped past Laxus's waistband to grasp onto his member. Laxus broke their kiss, a tattered breath easing through his lips. Gajeel's thumb was pushing at his head, his hand running down his length. Gajeel's lips were on his neck, hungrily starting fires all down his skin, nipping at flesh down his chest, his naval, just above his jeans. He pressed lips hungrily against cloth, squeezing Laxus's erection and causing a moan to tear through him against his will.

He could see victory in his bloody eyes and his wicked grin was once again contorting his features, "Do you like that?" his voice was husky and he let his teeth push against the fabric, eliciting another moan from the man above him. His other hand was pulling down his pants, trying to free his dick so he could control the blonde even more. Laxus's mind was fuzzy, the pleasure making it impossible to think. He had enough rational thought to grip Gajeel's wrist, to make him stop his advances.

"Gajeel…" his voice was little more than a husky whine, a tiny call to what was left of rational thought. But his name leaving the Lightning Mage's lips made the other man visibly shake with desire, his eyes raking up to meet golden irises with frenzied question, "…Stop."

Red eyes widened.

"Please…"

"Stop…?" the way Gajeel said the word seemed like he was tasting it for the first time. His entire body was as taut as a bowstring, so rigid and inflexible he looked like if Laxus pushed him the wrong way his entire body would shatter. He released his hold on Laxus and sat back on his heels, something destructive and powerful suddenly overcoming him. His words were conflicted and pained when he spoke, his knuckles pressing against his lips angrily, "…why?"

He was becoming irate, an emotion that was quickly usurping the lust that had been there before with surprising ferocity. He looked violent, his gleaming eyes turning from lustful and hungry to livid. He was shaking, a loss of control overtaking him in a way that almost frightened Laxus. Laxus was transfixed on his tanned, pierced face as red eyes raked across him like he criticizing a meal. An angry tongue ran harshly against fangs to the point that Laxus saw a droplet of blood swell and disappear into his mouth.

"I could take it from you…" Gajeel was thinking aloud, his hands clamping around Laxus's biceps, squeezing to the point of pain. It was hard to believe that just seconds earlier those hands were caressing pale skin, calling forth trembles and pleasure instead of incredulous terror. Green magic was dousing the area in emerald light, shading the chiseled features of the Iron Dragon and reflecting sadistically off his iridescent scales. Cold iron was coiling around Laxus's arms and legs so quickly he couldn't squirm away from its grasp. It forced his back to arch and clamped both arms painfully behind him. His legs were forced to bend, spread eagle, until it stretched his groin in a way that made Laxus hiss. Laxus didn't consider himself to flexible at all, and it was painfully apparent just how unaccommodating his body was.

Laxus released electricity only to have it turn and bite back at him, travelling up the new conduits wrapped around his wrists, arms, and thighs. He ground his teeth and threw his head back against the shocks, realizing for the first time the pain his power could bring. With a sinking feeling he realized he couldn't fight back at all. His limbs were completely restrained until almost pain, his magic now working against him because of the conductive metal, and Gajeel was still kneeling between his legs, passion melting in the white-hot anger because of Laxus's oppugnancy.

He felt Gajeel's weight leave his hips, his shadow falling over the pale man as he slowly paced around his twisted body. His steps were almost leisurely in their deliberateness, heavy boots landing against the earth closer and closer to Laxus's ear. Golden eyes squinted open and searched for what was just out of sight. Heavy, iron-studded boots stopped on either side of his head and lowered the tanned body of Gajeel down until Laxus finally met red eyes. Gajeel's molten rubies held Laxus in suspense, completely helpless literally at his feet.

His rippling body reached forward until a hand splayed across his lower stomach, fingers just grazing his right thigh and travelled up, feather light across his flesh. It was a touch foreign and agonizingly seductive to Laxus, causing gooseflesh to rise wherever the tips of Gajeel's fingers met him. Every nerve stood on end; his lungs found it harder and harder to breath as his silky touch travelled up his chest to trail a line across his neck, finally ghosting across his pale lips before vanishing. Laxus realized he'd dug his boots into the ground trying to lean into it. His body craved more and his golden orbs rolled into his skull.

 _How?_ _How could this man do this to him?_ He was breathless, muscles stretched to their extent, fear and passion fighting angrily in his core because of the dominating male over him. He was incredibly hard, his body deploring for more of his touch even though his lips refused to speak it. Then Gajeel's lusty voice broke through the confusing wall in front of him, adding fuel to his raging fire.

"All I have to do is bite you…" hot lips were pressing against his neck, fighting against skin, pushing until teeth were running across his throat, "And you'll be like molten iron in my hands…"

The words weren't meant as a threat but the thought of losing control completely shook Laxus's core. He didn't want to ever do that again. Snippets of memories were flashing through his mind, showing him what happened when he didn't maintain himself. When his dragon instincts ruled he was a terrifying type of destruction. He didn't want that again.

Incredibly, against all of his angry fairy pride he let out an exasperated whimper. The noise silenced the silver man, caused him to retract his fangs and Laxus's restraints became loose, still not allowing him to escape but easing the tension that had him squeezing his eyes shut against sharp pain.

"Gajeel… let me go…" the words seemed tiny from the hulking blonde man and it didn't settle well with Gajeel, "Please don't…"

He was released, hitting the ground hard, his stretched body letting out a sigh. He was lifting himself up in a second, for a fleeting second seeing bloody before fists were gripping his collar, bringing his face incredibly close to a bleeding lip. Gajeel must have bit himself, because Laxus knew he hadn't caused that damage. Gajeel's hot breath covered his face almost as if he were about to kiss him, but their lips stayed an eternity apart.

Laxus's scarred eye met Gajeel's raging red.

"You better get the hell away from me," Gajeel's voice sent a powerful shiver down Laxus's spine that he tried to hide to no avail, "Because the next time I catch your scent near me, I'm not letting you leave until this fucking heat is done with me."

He let Laxus drop gracelessly onto the ground before he turned, eyes strained as he stalked off into the forest. The light from the sun must have finally ducked behind the western mountains because as soon as he left Laxus was left in an unnatural darkness.


	22. Chapter 22

Gajeel thought he might be dying.

Maybe that wasn't quite accurate.

He _knew_ he was dying.

He lay on his side, his lungs expanding and contracting as he took deep, ragged breaths. A feeling was boiling under the surface of his skin that was so totally indescribable. It wasn't painful and yet somehow akin to thousands of tiny ants marching subcutaneous paths across his body. He could have torn his skin off if he would have thought it could help. But the restlessness would never end it seemed; it just felt content to slowly drive the ebony-haired man insane.

The thought of Laxus's golden eyes were close to putting him over the edge. He'd seen those eyes filled with fury, pain, and hungry need but never in his life had he seen them brimming with desire like they were just the afternoon past. He'd witnessed them roll back with a shuttering breath from the blonde, felt his muscles shaking from want, and yet his lips had parted not with begs for more but begs for release.

Red eyes forced themselves open and he pulled himself upright, letting calloused fingers rest against his lips.

 _"Please don't…"_

It had made him sick.

But now he felt like he should have ignored it.

Fingers laced into raven locks while a separate set travelled down to grip his inner thigh.

He should have just bitten him. Should have let sharp fangs sink into ivory fairy skin. Just the thought made a tremor go down his spine. He could have had Laxus in complete ecstasy; he could have seen those golden eyes dilated in pleasure. He wouldn't be in the misery he was in currently but probably in the middle of violating the fair-haired man.

His tongue slithered across dry lips, his hand massaging the harsh erection pushing against his pants.

Seeing him restrained, legs spread eagle, back arched, body so completely open for the taking, had almost done him in. He wanted to play with that beautiful look in Laxus's eyes, hear that gruff voice moan even more. He'd been so receptive to Gajeel's touches that it could have been criminal. He was already hard, his breath already hitching in his throat when Gajeel had barely touched him. He couldn't believe how difficult it had been to stop when Laxus had pleaded for him to do so…

Couldn't believe how much he'd wanted Laxus to beg…

Gajeel bit his lip as he grasped his own member, his mind filling with thoughts of the Lightning Dragon Slayer, face flushed, voice strained, body rolling in passion. He stroked gently at first, envisioning golden eyes glossing over in desire, and then ramped up the pace as his thoughts spiraled into much more erotic images. He wished so badly that he hadn't allowed the man his freedom. He had him perfectly ready, so completely helpless in so many ways.

He rubbed harder, gasping at the forced pleasure he was administering to himself. His body was on fire, begging for release but knowing this would do nothing to satisfy his intense cravings. He moved faster, letting his free hand ghost up his torso, barely graze his quivering throat, until he bit into his knuckle. He released on the ground, his body shuttering against the orgasm. The heat ebbed just slightly, allowing him the ability to straighten himself before it once again began boiling him alive.

For the millionth time he wished he had just made Laxus stay.

He'd been alone all that night and the morning after. How many days had it been since he'd been submitted to a living Hell? Three? He still had four more days. Four. Long. Days.

He let his hands graze the piercings on his arms, rub each bump on his eyebrows and beside his nose. Iron scales cast glittering refracting light onto the ground in front of him. He gripped his shirt and pulled it up and over his head, the fabric agitating his skin in a way not dissimilar to sunburnt flesh. Instead of pain, however, all it did was fuel the crawling warmth that scattered across his skin. He stood and let his pants fall to the earth, turning towards the small lake that he'd made his camp beside.

A waterfall filled the gully with chilled mountain water and a small stream carried the overflow further down the region. He walked into the freezing water and let it numb his senses. He sunk down to his knees; cold shivers making him momentarily forget his previous misery for this new one. His breathing caused tiny ripples across the glass surface, his harsh shivers breaking his sight to the bottom.

He tilted his head back and took a deep calming breath. His tongue pressed against his fangs as he tasted the air. A growl left his lips when he caught a scent on the wind. It was faint, barely making it to him in the chilled air around him, but it spiked his blood all the same.

"Goddamn…" he breathed, his mind breaking into a whole new frenzy. He knew this scent and it baffled him and enraged him at the same time.

He dove into the cold river and took off into the water. He could hear the pounding of water overhead as he swam under the waterfall, finally coming up for air on the other side. The cave was shallow but dark and cool. He'd found this place once when some hikers had strayed near the area. He'd hidden, hoping to god to find the strength in him not to attack the poor saps who'd stumbled so close to his campsite. The waterfall, he had found, cut off anything from the outside. The only sound was that of cascades of fresh water on rocks, the only smell was of pine and sand and ice.

Gajeel huddled in the darkness like a fugitive of the law, his half-naked body shivering from the never-ending heat as well as the cold water that clung to his being. He wrinkled his nose and stopped a growl that was climbing through his ribs. The scent was reaching him through the water, calling a powerful response from his body. He squeezed his eyelids tightly together and bit his knuckle, his free hand balling into a tight fist. He had to stay still, had to keep from rushing out and…

"Gajeel?" the voice broke through every restrictive thought he had. His body was on fire. He swallowed against his throat closing and his nostrils flared, "Gajeel, where are you?"

"Goddamn…" he whispered again, clutching his chest. And he was supposed to remain calm?

He saw a tall shadow pass in front of the falling water, watched as the figure ducked into the flow and reappear just a few short feet away. Gajeel's bloody eyes glared at the offending male, everything in his body screaming to move but the only thing keeping him transfixed was something short of a miracle.

"What… the hell… do you want…?" Gajeel huffed, gritting his teeth.

Golden eyes looked down at him, a sure, confident smile turning the corners of his lips up in a triumphant grin, "You."

The heat that seared Gajeel's skin was almost enough to drive him mad as the tall blonde stalked quietly from the water but there was something so completely wrong that it made his stomach feel sour. His movements were all wrong. Each step was harkening to a feline stalking its prey, slow and slinking and full of purpose. Gajeel bared his teeth at the man.

"Who the fuck are you…" metal began rolling in his gut; his fury was bubbling to the surface.

"A smart one, aren't you?" his voice distorted, became higher in pitch, and the form of Laxus changed. Shimmering light encompassed his form and his sillouette began to shrink and slim until instead of broad shoulders and strong muscles the supple fom of a woman with long black locks surfaced.

Gajeel's eyes widened.

He had enough time to hear the whistling of something in the air and he dodged, rolled to the side and then lunged towards the woman. Excitement filled her features when they collided and he sent them tumbling into the water. He tried to grab hold of her but it was as if her body wasn't even there, ghosting out of his reach in the water and easily pulling herself to shore.

With as much power as he could muster he pounced on her, this time taking grasp of her arms and forcing her down. She hit the ground hard but it wasn't fear that overtook her features. A smug pride had her grin spreading across her face as pain whispered it's way into the muddled mind of the Dragon Slayer. He looked to his arm and saw three darts lodged there and almost immediately felt the limb begin to go limp.

"Maybe not so smart," she grinned and he faultered, falling to the ground in a heap. Cold was icing its way through his arm to his chest and quickly trying to consume his body. She easily flipped them over, straddling his stomach and placing two hands on his bare chest.

"Dragon Slayers really are remarkable," she hummed, "But you are sadly such dull-minded creatures."

Gajeel's lungs were fighting for air. Whatever numbing agent he'd been injuected with was making it hard for him to breathe.

"What the fuck do you want…"

He couldn't find the strength to lift his head anymore and his vision was beginning to blur. He was trying to move, to fight against the pressure that was dragging him down into cold darkness but nothing he did seemed effective. His hands and even fingers couldn't move and he didn't have the strength to push the woman off of him. Shadows of figures were starting to surround his vision and he was suddenly aware of the scents of many people around him.

"I told you already," she laughed, a sound that reminded him of a time months ago but his mind couldn't place what, "I want _you_. Well, part of you. Let's just hope your body doesn't give out by the time I'm done."

"Goddamn… bitch…" the shadows were consuming him now and he felt like he was falling. The last thing he heard was her laughter.


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter 23:

Laxus sat in the guildhall, mug in hand, staring at the doors. How long had it been since he'd left the ebony-haired man alone in the woods? Surely his heat should have subsided by now? Had it been ten days or eleven? He'd been so nervous that he'd lost track.

Nothing.

No word.

Not even reports of damage from a botched mission.

Nothing.

The silence was what was making him uneasy. Gajeel didn't just _stay away_ from the guild. He hadn't taken a mission when he'd left so it wasn't complications with that. He hadn't had the money or supplies with him to last this long on his own, although Laxus was sure the man could probably fend for himself in the wilds if he had to. But it had just simply been _too long_.

He remembered the agitated Dragon Slayer stating he would only be gone a week. He'd insisted that was when he'd return. Briefly Laxus thought maybe he'd been embarrassed by his behavior when Laxus had intruded on his privacy but Gajeel wasn't exactly the type to let that bother him. Not to mention the two men had put each other in far worse situations before and managed to show their faces around each other still.

 _Did something happen?_

Laxus silenced the anxious thought before it could take root. Gajeel was a strong man and he was more than able to take care of himself. There was no reason why Laxus should be upset or worried. In fact, he was almost positive that any moment the angry man would come waltzing in and order a beer like he always did, not even giving the Lightning Mage a glace to prove how much he didn't care. Those scarlet eyes would probably roll backwards when he caught sight of Laxus sitting by the bar, listening to Mira's mindless chatter. He'd be in a foul mood for sure.

"Thinking about Gajeel again?" Mira's playful voice shook Laxus from his thoughts and he looked over at her. She was resting her chin on her hand and was leaning near to him, "I take it he hasn't come back then?"

"You would know," Laxus huffed, crossing his arms and leaning back in his seat.

"Did something happen when you went after him?" her voice was quiet as she spoke, almost as if she were scared of his answer.

"Nothing that would keep him from coming back to Fairy Tail."

"Oh? So what _did_ happen?" her eyes were coy as they ran over his face, searching for a chink in the blonde's armor. Laxus just grinned cheekily at her.

"Don't tell me you're jealous… of a man, no less." he cocked an eyebrow as if to emphasize how ridiculous the claim was.

She lowered her voice dangerously and he could see the gleam of a demon in her eyes, "You used to be obsessed with me once. You think I can't see it when you're that way with someone else?"

His smile fell a little flat.

She puckered her lips slightly as she mocked him, "With a man, no less."

"Getting a little chummy?" the voice of the salmon-haired mage drew Laxus's attention and his golden eyes fell on the chagrined boy. His hands were clenched into fists as he glared up at the man seated at the bar. Mira crossed her arms and leaned back, confusion drawing her pale brows together as she looked down on Natsu.

"I ain't in a mood to fight with you today, Natsu," Laxus dismissed him immediately, "Go bother that Lucy girl."

"I'm just sayin', Gajeel has been gone for almost two weeks and all of a sudden you're cuddling up to Mirajane," his black eyes pierced into Laxus and he could see the vein on the side of his neck standing out against his toned skin as he gritted his teeth. The angry tension that boiled from him filled the air and Laxus clicked his teeth.

"I think you need to mind your own business, kid," Laxus growled, gaining the stares of a few members who were nearby. He was concentrating on stemming his magical flow. He didn't want to gather an audience.

"Doesn't it bother you that he hasn't come back?" the boy took a step closer, challenge in his eyes.

"We're both worried about Gajeel," Mirijane talked smoothly, trying to defuse the situation as best she could, "We're just talking, Natsu. I was just trying to cheer him up."

Natsu took another step closer to Laxus, fire rolling in his smoldering coal eyes, "Why haven't you gone looking for him?"

Electricity charged the air as Laxus quickly began losing his patience, "If you're so worried, why don't _you_ go look for him."

"Because-!" his voice seemed to echo off of every smooth surface in the hall. Laxus's eyes widened as a range of emotions flashed across his face before angry determination took control, "Fine!" he snapped, "I will."

He turned on his heel, sparks singeing the air as he marched. Happy briefly rose to follow but Pantherlily stopped him, whispering something into the blue cat's ears that made him refrain. A few guild members murmured at the strange exchange between the two Dragon Slayers but none approached Laxus, knowing far better than to do something like that. Mira frowned as the doors slammed shut behind Natsu and her white locks shimmered as she turned back to Laxus.

"What the hell was that about?" Laxus mumbled. He was gripping his mug so tightly he thought it might shatter.

"Don't you think you should go?" Mira said quietly, diverting her eyes from the blonde.

Laxus bit his cheek as he sipped his beer. Of course he wanted to go but after a display like that he didn't want to move from his spot. He didn't know for sure, but he couldn't help the sneaking suspicion that maybe Gajeel was just avoiding him and that's why he hadn't returned. Surely he wasn't in any real harm. But Laxus had just left him after an _extremely_ open invitation. Maybe the reason Gajeel hadn't returned was simply he didn't want to see Laxus for a while. And he had no idea how long that while might be.

But now Natsu was leaving to find him and that caused a whole new series of emotions to rush through his chest. It was obvious from the conversation he'd overheard at the bathhouse that something had happened between the two – and whatever it was involved Lucy. Not only that, Natsu didn't seem completely over it. If he let Natsu find Gajeel first… the possibilities made Laxus's stomach roll with magic.

Mira studied him and sighed, knowing exactly what to say to get the Lightning Mage moving, "If Gajeel's in trouble it'll take more than just Natsu to help him. He used to be an S-Class Mage, after all. Maybe you should go, Laxus? Just to be sure?"

He met her eyes. They were sullen and worried and dejected. She _was_ jealous that Laxus had fallen for someone other than herself; it was clear as day on her face. But aside from that, she was genuinely worried for Gajeel. She was a kind person despite the fact that she knew she was being rejected. Laxus had to commend the porcelain devil. She never put her feelings before anyone else's.

"You're too good for me, Mira," Laxus smiled gently at her.

She forced that jaw-dropping smile onto her features and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, "I know."

He lifted himself from the stool and grabbed his bag from the floor, still full of supplies from the mission he'd just returned from. He stalked out the door after Natsu.

To his surprise, as soon as he exited he noticed the salmon-haired boy was leaned against a tree not far away. His eyes immediately landed on Laxus and he pointedly waited for the older man to approach. Laxus couldn't stop the sneaking suspicion that he'd been conned on some level.

The smug grin that grew on the Fire Dragon's face only confirmed his doubts, "I figured you wouldn't be too far behind."

"So are you coming or what?" Laxus fumed as he passed Natsu in his decent from the guildhall.

"After you."

"He probably doesn't want shit to do with me, you know," Laxus muttered.

"Yeah… me either." Natsu laughed somewhat lightheartedly.

"Fan-fucking-tastic."


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter 24:

The trip was tense and awkward to say the least. For the majority of the time they stayed in silence, only breaking it with occasional words or grunts as they both kept to their own thoughts. To be honest, Laxus was a little curious. Why did Natsu care so much? And why did he insist on being here? He knew that they'd had a past and as much as he tried to deny it there was a pang of jealousy in his heart whenever he thought about it. How serious was their past relationship, exactly?

He stuffed his hands into his pockets as they walked in silence, quietly telling himself he actually didn't and honestly shouldn't care. Laxus had no claim to Gajeel. They could barely stand each other. Each time they'd been involved they hadn't been in their right minds.

Each time they'd been involved Laxus seemed to do nothing but hurt the other Dragon Slayer or force him to do something he didn't want to do.

But he didn't have the balls to admit that to himself.

The thick quiet was eating away at him. Usually, it was something he didn't mind but the whole situation had him a little off balance. It didn't help that even Natsu wasn't his usual hotheaded self. He seemed just as off kilter as Laxus, avoiding his gaze and scratching at the back of his head nervously every ten or fifteen minutes. He couldn't stand this anymore. He had to break the silence.

"He's probably fine, you know," Laxus forced out, trying to sound as natural as possible.

Dark eyes flashed his direction, "I don't know… he's never been gone this long before."

"Maybe he just wanted to spend some time alone… he's like that,"

Natsu didn't respond, just kept his eyes forward as they continued their trek. Laxus clicked his teeth.

"Why are you so worried, then?" he grunted, "Did he say something to you before he left?"

"No…" Natsu clenched his fists defensively, eyeing Laxus out of the corner of his eye, "He just said he was going to be back in a week and then without saying anything he never came back… you don't think that maybe something happened?"

"I just think you're reading too much into it," Laxus said coolly, trying to diffuse the salmon haired boy.

"Out of everyone at the guild, shouldn't you be the most worried?" Natsu spat venomously.

Laxus stopped in his tracks, causing Natsu to have to turn to look at him. The two locked eyes heatedly, daring the other to respond.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"Don't you care about him?" Natsu growled at him through gritted teeth and sparks of fire began licking at his fists.

Laxus was sure his face reflected how stunned he felt. His stomach bunched angrily and he prickled, not completely sure as to why he was suddenly so furious with the fire mage.

"Do you?" it sounded more like an accusation than a question and after a few minutes of Natsu returning his angry glare he finally let out a tense sigh.

"Not like that,"

Silence once again descended on the pair, though some of the anger had finally been dissolved from the air. 

"So how did you find out?" Natsu laughed easily, trying to smooth things over even if just slightly.

"I overheard you two talking."

"Really? Probably shouldn't let Gajeel know,"

"Yeah?"

"He doesn't like people knowing about his personal life."

"Makes sense," Laxus sighed, happy that the tension in the air had finally given way. He felt like he could breathe again, "So, uh, what happened?"

Natsu cast a sly glance at the blonde, his eyes sparked with mischief, "Why do you want to know?"

Laxus gritted his teeth, "You're such a kid."

"Do you _liiike_ him?"

"Hell if I know! I was just trying to make conversation," Laxus seethed, "Maybe I should have left it alone when you wouldn't even look at me,"

Natsu eyed him as if to see if he was serious of not before he turned his attention forward again, "Gajeel noticed I was acting strange a while back. He'd actually only been at the guild for a short while. It's still pretty hazy looking back on it, but I think Gajeel knew what was going on way before the idea crossed my mind…"

Laxus furrowed his brow at the Fire Dragon, clearly confused. Natsu's cheeks flushed red.

"The Heat… Gajeel thinks it's like a coming of age thing since it happened to him when he was so young. He doesn't believe me but I'd never been through it until after Gajeel came to the guild."

"…wait… what?" Laxus stopped in his tracks and just kind of gawked at Natsu who was trying to stare a hole into the gravel road at their feet as he was speaking.

"Heh, yeah… weird, right? I mean, Igneel said it was a competitive thing so maybe it never happened to me because there weren't any other Dragon Slayers around… and now suddenly there are four of us at the same guild…"

"So… what was different about Gajeel?"

"I don't know, honestly. He won't talk about it."

"And you think, what? Something happened to him?"

Natsu shrugged, "Who knows. But when Gajeel realized what was going on he kind of followed me home and talked to me about it… which was weird. But I mean, it kept me out of trouble. Usually, I go see Lucy whenever I think something is wrong."

Laxus only grunted in response. He could only imagine what would have happened if Gajeel hadn't intervened. Maybe since it was Lucy it would have worked out. It wasn't hard to tell that the two had a thing for each other. But at least Natsu didn't have to deal with the what-if's. Or the guilt.

Laxus's stomach felt a little sour even as his mind just barely remembered what had happened between he and Gajeel. His eyes darted to the pink haired mage as he walked on, leading slightly and seemingly trying to sort out some of his own thoughts as well. How did Natsu find out about everything?

"So… did Gajeel tell you about what happened?" Natsu returned a blank stare for a moment and Laxus ran his tongue against the inside of his teeth angrily, "The mission."

"Oh," Natsu stopped and pushed his hands into his pockets, obviously uncomfortable, "Yeah… I mean… I put together a lot of it on my own. You smelled like each other, so it wasn't too hard to figure out at least part of it. The rest..." he shrugged, "I got him mad enough to tell me."

"Doesn't seem like that's too hard for you to do."

Natsu flashed a toothy smile, finally lightening up.

"What did he say? About what happened…?" Laxus turned his head as if he were looking off into the trees, trying to hide the heat that was inching it's way up his neck. He tried to ignore the anxious feeling in the pit of his stomach. Why should he care what Gajeel said?

Natsu's eyes were keen and he saw through Laxus easily, "Not too much… just that you two got into a pretty bad fight."

Laxus had no idea why, but he felt like he'd been holding his breath. He sucked in a breath but whatever he was about to say was immediately taken away when he detected a hint of something on the wind. Natsu stiffened at the same moment and both of their heads turned in the direction of the scent. Laxus's brow furrowed. Natsu plucked his way off of the trail and into the woods. As they walked Laxus felt the prickle of something familiar, an electric sensation from the eyes of someone hidden in the forest. He couldn't help glancing back over his shoulder as every stride took them farther off the path.

"Gajeel!" Natsu called into the woods, his voice bouncing back at them off of the trunks of trees and the warm summer ground, "Gajeel! It's time to go back to the guild!"

Laxus's ears picked up the sound of water. That was right, Gajeel had camped out by a small waterfall. A nervous feeling coiled in the pit of his stomach. It was an eerie quiet that was around them. There were no birds, no scuttle of animals in the brush, not even wind. Just the ever-growing noise of water hitting stones greeted them as they approached. Laxus tasted the air tentatively, sure he'd catch the whiff of sweat and iron. Instead, all he could detect was forest. As they breached the clearing, Laxus's eyes immediately trained on something on the ground.

"Gajeel!" Natsu's call sliced through the air, less care free than before. Laxus stepped towards the abandoned camp. The simple man that he was, he didn't carry much. His mat was unrolled and there was no blanket. There was no sign of a fire. Just scraps of iron metal glittering up at him as it was strewn about the ground. Natsu came up beside him, wrinkling his nose as he tried to figure out whatever Laxus was looking at. He crouched down, dark eyes flicking this way and that.

Laxus stuffed his hands into his pockets. The smell of the Iron Dragon was muted under the damp of rain and the natural humid of the forest. This place hadn't been abandoned recently. Laxus tilted his head towards the waterfall and noticed how the water seemed darker as it fell against the rocks in one spot. A cave maybe?

He made to step towards the water when his heavy boot brushed against something in the dirt. He glanced down, his eyes noticing instead of the browns of dirt or the green of moss a slightly different hue of something in the dust. He squatted down and dug his fingers into the damp mud and pulled out what looked to be a dart with a sharp needle point just greater than the length of a tac.

"Natsu…" Laxus glanced up and saw the boy was standing stock still. His eyes were locked on something in the forest and Laxus sprung up from his crouch and stalked quietly to him. He dropped his voice to a harsh whisper, "Natsu."

"I don't think he hears you," the voice startled him and he froze, his heart suddenly beating much harder than before. Slim and sliding from the tree like a snake, Bianca's feet made a muted noise as if she were a puma dropping from its perch. She was silent and Laxus was incredibly aware of the fact she had no scent. It was almost terrifying how undetectable she was. She could have been following them for miles and neither Laxus nor Natsu would have ever known. He gritted his teeth at the thought, angry lightning snapped around his fists as he tried to contain himself.

"Where's Gajeel." Laxus demanded flatly, pushing down the snarl that wanted to rip its way through his throat. He didn't want her to see how difficult it was for him to remain calm. Deep down in his chest a sinking feeling started to grip him and he forbade himself from allowing the thought to find purchase in his mind: _What had she done to him?_

"I love how direct you are. No games, no riddles, just straight to business…" she sashayed up to him, confident and smug knowing she had leverage against the hulking mage, "Your little damsel is locked away, safe and unharmed. And he'll remain that way… as long as you do exactly as I say."

He was so furious that red was beginning to inch its way into his vision. He could hear his blood begin to sing through his veins and it took every ounce of control in him to keep his magic in check. But the electricity was already building a current in the air, causing the hair on his arms to stand up and the hum of energy to make the air buzz. He kept his fists balled at his sides.

"What do you want?"

She grinned slyly in a way that made him feel like it should have been the blood covered jaws of a shark instead of the softly rouged lips of a woman, "As much as it pains me to say… I need you."

Laxus didn't respond, just continued to glare at her silently.

"You see, I wanted this to be easier. The day I tested my potion on you was supposed to be our last encounter. It was my hope that you'd kill your friend and I'd have his body to play around with at my leisure… but you didn't."

She slipped behind Laxus and he had to fight not to immediately turn and keep her in his sights. He felt the brush of her fingers against the small of his back as she walked around him.

"You already have your potion. You know the fucking thing works. Let Gajeel go."

"Hmm?" she came around to face him then, eyes coy as she grinned sweetly at him, "You think that's what I need? Laxus, the men I deal with have enough testosterone as it is. If they wanted products that were ready to fight them off they wouldn't need my services, now would they?"

Laxus's stomach dropped.

"What my clients want is something that will bend my products to their will… make it so they can't say no…"

"Fuck off!" Laxus snapped, taking a step forward towards Bianca. She didn't even flinch and her smile didn't waiver.

"Tsk, and here I thought you'd want to help your friend," she stepped coolly away, not even slightly perturbed by the raging Thunder Dragon in front of her, "But I have to say I wouldn't be too thrilled about it either. The man has a nasty temper on him…"

She eyed Natsu as she spoke and let one of her hands glide gently against his arm, "Maybe we'll just have to take your pink haired friend with us instead."

"Don't touch him you f-"

The feel of magic filling the air made Laxus dodge out of the way. He turned, his eyes searching wildly to find the offender who shot at him. He gritted his teeth as he caught sight of her lackey, Caetus if he remembered correctly. He could take him down in a heartbeat but what would that mean for Natsu who still unable to move as Bianca eyed him hungrily? He suppressed a growl and stayed still, clenching his fists. The ebony haired woman traced her fingers up Natsu's neck to grip his chin, her eyes flickering over to Laxus as she examined the Fire Dragon as if he were just an animal.

"Don't touch him." Laxus growled again, resignation in his voice. She let her hand drop from his face and flipped her long tresses, a pleased smile coming to her lips with victory.

"You'll meet us back here at sundown… alone," she moved with grace over to him and gripped his shirt, pulling him down so he'd have to look at her eye level, "And if anyone else comes with you the red-eyed one dies."

She released him and he bit back the ire that was making his stomach turn. Throbbing scarlet was making his peripheral vision foggy. He'd never wanted to punch anyone so badly. Like a vulture smelling a drop of blood while circling its dying prey, she honed in on his anger and helplessness. She cocked an eyebrow at him.

"Yes Bianca," she cooed at him.

"Yes…" Laxus's voice was hardly more than a feral growl as his golden eyes pierced into her, "Bianca."


	25. Chapter 25

Laxus took in a steadying breath.

He was alone in the dim light of uncovered candles and the smell of cheap fabric. He didn't even think about sitting. The atrocities that must have been carried out here he didn't want any part of. He just stood in the center of the room, golden eyes raging against the locked door in front of him. His stomach was in knots and his limbs trembled slightly. He'd fought terrifying wizards before but this was not a situation he'd ever imagined he'd be in. Most of his clothes were laying in a heap in the corner and his feet were bare on the cold stone floor. All they'd allowed him were his shorts.

He'd been overly cruel to Natsu but the whole thing was absolutely unnerving. The second Bianca had vanished he'd suddenly resumed whatever digging around he'd been in the middle of before the encounter and was filled with disbelief when Laxus had told him they had to leave immediately. It was as if he'd just suddenly been frozen, completely unaware of time passing or the conversation that was had just in front of him. And of course the chivalrous Natsu wanted to help as soon as Laxus started to explain. The damn hot head was all fiery and ready to march into the forest after Bianca. Mavis' sakes, what was he supposed to tell him? The boy refused to take no for an answer.

"Gajeel doesn't need you, go the fuck home!"

The way his eyes had looked hurt, even if it was just for a second, made Laxus's stomach turn. But hurt turned to understanding and he paced away, realizing maybe that whatever it was that had infuriated the Thunder Dragon was worth being protected from.

And holy hell was Laxus glad he'd protected him.

This whole place, every inch of it, reeked of bodily fluids despite the clear use of bleach and alcohol to sterilize every flat surface. Bianca had upgraded since her last hideout was invaded by the Magic Council. This place was no haphazardly arranged block of cells. Instead, each cage was like a solitary confinement chamber: soundproofed and made to be easily cleaned in the event a client got out of hand. They'd thrown Laxus in this particular cell to get him on edge and it worked. He knew exactly what took place in these cold, cement walls. The thought made him want to retch.

And he was next in the lineup.

The door swung open and glaring fluorescent light pierced the soft darkness he'd been immersed in. Caetus's silhouette motioned for him to come out and he steeled himself against the chill in the air as he was led into the hall. As they passed each sell, a four-inch-thick glass window allowed Laxus to peer inside. After a couple quick glances, he was unable to do anything aside from keep his eyes forwards. They were boys thirteen years to eighteen - maybe even the early twenties for some – and they were thrown in three to a cell, all huddled together and shrinking away as the saw Laxus and his guide approach. Most looked poorly fed and a few looked beaten. Each of them were dressed as he was. He gritted his teeth against the bile rising in his throat.

He'd get them out… he'd find a way and get them out…

"In," Caetus instructed, pushing Laxus harshly towards a room without windows. The inside was well-lit. There was a desk and a wall of monitors, all black and cold like mirrors reflecting his distorted image back at him, "Sit."

Laxus sat in one of the plush chairs. The stink of leather made him wrinkle his nose. Caetus locked the door behind him and stood by it, his eyes trained on a second door on the opposite side of the room. It wasn't long before the familiar sound of heels tapping against the ground could be heard echoing behind the wall and then the slim form of a woman slipped into the room.

"So glad you could join us," Bianca smiled, gliding into her chair across the desk from him and crossing her legs, "I'll have to be honest, I'm sort of surprised you came. I thought you'd run."

"What do you want from me?" Laxus growled, crossing his arms as he attempted to calm his nerves. Her eyes seemed to pierce through his armor and see his very soul. He felt incredibly exposed.

"I just need you to get bitten and injected with venom. Then we'll just need a few blood samples and you're both free to go," she grinned, "Easy, no?"

"Easy," Laxus glared up at the monitors, "Makes me wonder why you needed my help for it."

Bianca's smile faded a bit as she followed his gaze, "He didn't take to the other options very well."

She pulled out a small remote and flipped on the screens. Laxus wasn't sure what he was expecting to see, but it made his heart seize in his chest. Flipping on one at a time, each screen was a portion of a whole picture from a vantage point high in the corner of a dark room. Furniture was sparse, only a bed and what looked to be a metal table. Any instruments that would have been on it seemed to be strewn about the room and there were scratches on the walls and floor.

"Why is there so much blood?" Laxus whispered, trying to still the tremor that shivered its way down his spine. The dark substance was splattered against the wall, black hand prints slid against the exit and stained the floor as if someone had made a desperate attempt to get away.

"It's not his, if that's what you think," her voice sounded displeased, as if the very question was an annoyance.

Laxus turned his attention to her, unable to stop the angry magic that snapped from his fists, "Where the hell is he?"

"Oh he's in there," she laid her chin against her palm and stared at him through her lashes, "He's found the camera's blind spot."

Laxus glanced back at the horror room, training his eyes on every corner to see if he could even catch a glimpse of the iron mage. He gritted his teeth as his eyes followed where the bloodstains trailed off… just outside reach of the door.

"I have to say I'm a little surprised. Most guild mages have a hard time with violence. Boys are raised not to lay their hands on a woman and be disgusted by their inner demons and desires… Even you,"

Laxus turned his glare back to her, eyes widening as his gaze ran over her. Her white sleeves were rolled up slightly and Laxus caught sight of large green bruises, old and healing, in the shape of a hand gripping her arm. He ran his tongue against his teeth.

"I don't know what you mean,"

She sighed out a sultry laugh that made the air feel heavy, "Of course not," she stood and paced around the desk, each step slow and meaningful. She was a predator and even though he was larger and undoubtedly stronger than she, he felt powerless as she approached him, "Sit."

He stepped back but he didn't make a move to obey. She moved closer to him, her eyes sparking with something close to fury. His heart was pounding as she approached, singing so loudly in his ears that it drowned out every other noise in the room.

"Sit down."

She placed her hands on his hips, dug her nails into his flesh. He dropped down, everything in his body screaming. His will was telling him to stand. Why should he take orders from this demon of a woman? But what about Gajeel? What did she have the power to do? What kind of mage was she that she could have control of him like this? It was frightening and maddening. He growled at her as she shifted her weight forward and slipped her hands from his hips. His senses were on edge. He felt every inch of his skin that she touched cringe from her. She stopped at his thighs, never moving her eyes from his. He felt out of breath. She was manipulating him as if he were no more than a feeble boy. He felt like he was going to be sick from her closeness and his heart was in his throat. He couldn't believe how much he suddenly hated her.

"Good boy," her voice was like poison ink slipping from her mouth and pooling in his chest as she spoke. Her eyes were like kaleidoscopes. A million iridescent shades of blue and green stabbed into him like daggers, "You listen to authority, you don't hurt women, you keep your friends safe… you've been preconditioned for this all your life, don't you see?"

She sat down on his lap and he dug his nails into the leather of the chair. He kept his eyes forwards and refused to look at her. It took everything in him to keep his magic still. He told himself he was doing this for Gajeel, for those boys out in their cells. He'd endure this disgusting feeling in the pit of his stomach until he made sure they were safe. This wasn't weakness. This wasn't preconditioning. This was… this was…

"Like all bad things, Laxus, this will end too. You'll have your friend, you'll go home, live your quiet, happy, good life and put all of this behind you… the exact way you should be."

"Jealous, Bianca?" Laxus growled, somehow finding his voice.

"Hmm…? Of course not," she laid her head against his collar and he could feel her breath ghosting against his chest, vile and hot like the heat coming from her body, "I'm just thinking about how I hate people like you… kind… complacent… good. Make a villain of me when you're the ones who want this. You just won't get your hands dirty like I will."

"No one in their right mind wants shit like this,"

"They don't? I wonder what they pay me for, then?" she withdrew from him and instantly he felt cold. She threw her long hair over one shoulder as she walked away. She sat on the edge of her desk and crossed her knees, eyeing the monitors without another glance to Laxus, "Caetus."

"Yes, Master," he was at Laxus's side in an instant and Laxus could immediately feel the rage just boiling underneath the mage's skin.

"Let's wrap this up, then," she sighed, "Just keep in mind, darling, I will be watching… _everything_."

Caetus hauled him up and Laxus jerked away from him, growling at the slim man in warning as they exited. Back in the harsh white of the corridor, he felt his senses come back to him. It was almost as if everything that had happened in the office was just a dream. How could he have just let that happen? How could he have just let her touch him, manipulate him...

"What kind of magic is that?" he breathed, wrapping his fingers into a ball over his heart as if it would quell it's incessant pounding.

Caetus scoffed, a hateful noise as he strode before him, "Master Bianca didn't use any magic. She wouldn't waste her energy on you,"

Laxus opened his mouth to say something but was silenced by commotion farther down the hall. People were rushing to get things together. Three men who looked to be doctors or nurses were getting an examination table ready. Laxus swallowed as he noticed the tools that were obviously to be used for taking his blood. A few other men were lined up in the hall. They were wearing armor and with them small shields, almost as if they'd come straight from a crowd control squad. Laxus clenched his fists and his eyes fell on the door to Gajeel's cell.

"Bianca is going to radio us when to extract you," Caetus turned to face him, raking his eyes up and down Laxus's figure critically, "and as soon as she does, you're going on the table. I think you'll know what will happen to you if you or your friend struggle."

"Can we get this over with?" Laxus pushed him out of the way, walked pointedly past the guards and stood at the ready.

"After you," Caetus smirked, flipping a switch that seemed to power something down. Laxus heard the sound of an automatic lock unlatching and springing open. The four guards took a step back and Laxus could smell the fear falling off of them in waves. The silence that filled the air seemed to seep out like a shadow. He took a breath and pushed down the dread that had been eating at him since he'd stepped foot in this damn place.

 _"_ _I will be watching… everything…"_

He cast his eyes up. A black camera was just above him. He glanced down the hall and saw more, one every five feet or so. There was one in every cell he was sure.

"Stage fright?" Caetus's voice almost startled him. He glanced over at the crystal blue eyes that were glaring into him, "I'm sure you'll forget about them soon enough."

Angrily he gripped the handle and pushed open the heavy door. The room was darker than he thought it would be. Before he had time to contemplate his next step, four pairs of hands gripped his arms and forced him in. The sound of a heavy door slamming echoed in the small room and he was gripped by the palpable gloom. His breath caught in his throat. The scent of Gajeel was everywhere. It filled everything, everywhere. It numbed his senses and he felt almost as if he'd been completely wrapped in the man. Sweat. Arousal. Blood. Filth. If he could drown in a person he was sure he was doing it now.

A deep growl suddenly grounded his swimming mind. He turned slowly, his eyes fighting to see in the near pitch blackness around him. A shadow in the corner caught his attention and he froze as glittering ruby eyes gazed up at him.

"Don't fucking move," his voice was gating and cruel like nails against iron and Laxus could make out a faint tremble in his limbs, "or I will kill you."

"Redfox?" Laxus breathed, taking a step forward, "It's me… Laxus."

"Of course it is," Gajeel sneered, not moving an inch from his crouch in the corner, "How the hell did ya get here, then?"

"Natsu convinced me. He said there was something wrong if you were gone so long,"

"That so?" Gajeel growled. He took a quick breath and exhaled sharply, his whole body shook with the action, "Fuck… where the hell is Natsu, then?"

"I made him go… I didn't… I didn't want him to…" Laxus felt like his mind was getting fuzzy. Gajeel was still in heat. How was that even possible? How much of that damned potion had they been pumping into him to make it last 3 damn weeks? Laxus took another step towards him, "Redfox…"

"Didn't I tell you not to fucking move?!" Gajeel was on his feet, iron scales suddenly covering his body. Laxus froze as Gajeel seethed, his entire body shivering as he stood ready to fight.

"Listen, I want this about as much as you do but Bianca says if I don't do this she's kidnapping Natsu and dragging his ass into this too," Laxus didn't know if he was pleading or demanding or just trying to convince himself to move, but the words spilled out of his mouth with all of the dread that had finally boiled over inside of him. He had to do this, didn't he?

"How do I even know it's you?" Gajeel breathed as he ran his tongue over his fangs.

"…what?"

"She pretends to be you," Laxus's eyes widened. _The bruise_ …

"How… how do I prove…?" he stepped forwards again. They were just a couple more steps away from each other now. Laxus could make out each glittering scale on Gajeel's chest. It was just now that Laxus realized how sharp his talons were and how absolutely impenetrable he was. He was on the defensive and his skin was crawling with torment.

Gajeel grinned and it was coy and mischievous and almost sickeningly _not_ Gajeel, "How do you think?"

Laxus stopped his approach but it was getting harder and harder to stay calm. He didn't want to lose control. Not here. Not after everything Gajeel had been through…

"I…"

"You came all this way and you're scared now?" Gajeel growled, ruby eyes swimming, "Is it the claws?"

"I'm not scared of you, Redfox," Laxus said firmly and made himself take another step, "I… I don't know."

Gajeel's lip curled in a smirk, "You don't know?"

Laxus tried to contain himself but Gajeel's pheromones were driving him insane. He closed the space between them. Gajeel didn't move. His eyes were dilated and he was clearly taking in every inch of Laxus.

Laxus swallowed, "I… want to kiss you."

Gajeel leaned in close until his hips were aligned with Laxus's. Unlike Laxus, he was completely bare. His entire body was covered in his iron armor but when Laxus ran his fingers against his flesh it was still smooth and soft. Laxus's heart was pounding as Gajeel closed the remaining distance and forced his lips against to his own. They were harsh and hungry and Laxus felt like he might be eaten alive by the Iron Dragon. Harsh, clawed fingers gripped at his abs and inched fiery marks down his chest. Laxus gasped at the pain and tried not to pull away as Gajeel's lips started a trail to his jaw.

"Shit…" Gajeel growled, "I thought I could do this…"

"What…?"

Pain lanced through Laxus's chest as Gajeel dug his claws into his flesh. He tried to pull back Gajeel's hand gripped onto his arm and slammed him against the door. Laxus opened his mouth to call out but a knife-like talon was being pressed against his throat, causing him to tilt his head back in order to keep from being impaled.

"My bad…" Gajeel was panting and his body was shivering, "You gotta understand, after all that shit they pumped into me, I ain't exactly willing to take chances."

Laxus couldn't speak. He could barely breathe.

"Sorry Sparky, but I have to be sure it's you…" Laxus could hear feet shuffling on the other side of the door. No doubt Bianca had said something so they'd start preparing for whatever Gajeel was about to do, "Shock me."

"Why the-"

"I SAID SHOCK ME!"

Laxus was so confused but dammit he gripped onto Gajeel's arm and let loose all the electricity he'd kept pent up. The flash blinded them both and suddenly Gajeel's body was gone from in front of him. Laxus stumbled away from the door and steadied himself in the darkness. He blinked into the darkness his eyes hazy from the sudden shift in light.

The sound of screams made him bolt towards the now open door. Bright white florescent lighting had been replaced with blaring red and flashing in alarm. His eyes widened in horror as he caught sight of Gajeel, covered in blood and raking his claws against one of the guard's faces. He fell to the ground screaming as Gajeel dodged out of the way of a barrage of magic arrows from Caetus. He lunged into the room where the doctors had been waiting, all of them now shaking in the farthest corner of the room from him and he rummaged around for something.

"Redfox! What the hell?"

Gajeel managed to find a pair of pants and quickly dressed as Caetus approached, magic circle ready as he aimed for Gajeel's cover. Gajeel was working quickly and it amazed Laxus how cool he seemed under the circumstances. His bloody eyes cast around the room and he stopped on something that was sitting on the examination table. He picked it up and stuffed it into his pocket and made a motion at the doctors to tell them not to move.

"Redfox! Answer me! What the hell are you doing?"

"Don't follow me, Sparky. I'm going to do something you won't like,"

"Wh…What the hell do you mean…?"

Gajeel jumped into the corridor. He growled at Caetus and clenched his fists.

"Your buddies ain't here this time, fucker, and you and I both know you can't hurt me."

Laxus saw Caetus clench his teeth and aim.

"Get back in your cell,"

Gajeel sneered at him, "Make me."

A barrage of magic arrows launched forward at him. Gajeel didn't flinch, just smiled as the assault bounced off of him harmlessly. A serene, far off look came to his face as he waited. Laxus furrowed his brow. Gajeel… wasn't himself… or maybe he just wasn't the Gajeel Laxus was familiar with. He was cold and calculating and relished the fear that was filling his opponent's eyes.

He lunged forwards through the endless volleys of magic. Caetus pulled out a knife and swiped at Gajeel who let it ricochet off his arm as if it were a matchstick. A solid punch to the face had the slim mage crumpling to the ground. Laxus pulled himself from his cover and ran to the two. Caetus was screaming as Gajeel gripped his collar and slammed him against the wall. He was all rippling power as he pulled whatever it was he'd taken out of his pocket and held it up to Caetus's eyes.

"You know what this is, don't you?" Gajeel's voice was low as he spoke and his eyes were glittering darkly at his victim. Caetus didn't respond, only gasped under the Iron Dragon's crushing grip, "This is that sedative… remember? I know what it did to me… I wonder what it'll do to you?"

"Redfox…" Laxus breathed, but he didn't stop him.

"Let's find out."

Caetus screamed as Gajeel stabbed him in the neck and dropped him to the ground. The man convulsed, his eyes rolling back as he fought to control his limbs. Slowly, his movements became smoother, more sluggish, until finally he wasn't moving at all. His eyes, however, were wide and staring and full of terror.

"Whoops… wrong one. That must have been the one you used to paralyze me," Gajeel crouched down, his raven locks spilling over his shoulder as he gazed at him, "Must suck without that shit that puts you to sleep, huh? Now… what? You can still see? Hear? Feel?"

Caetus's breath hitched as Gajeel gripped the nape of his neck.

"We're about to have some fun, Caetus. I think maybe you should come and see it… since you like watching people in pain."

"Redfox!" Laxus growled, "You're not torturing that man."

Gajeel picked him up as if he were nothing and turned on Laxus, "This is your last chance, Laxus. Leave, follow that corridor and go get help - the magic council, Natsu, whoever the fuck you can find. Bring them back here and save the kids. Otherwise, stay out of my way."

Laxus gritted his teeth, lightning snapping at the air as he stared down the Iron Mage, "What are you going to do?"

Gajeel didn't respond, just turned with his prize in tow and began making his way down the hall.

"Gajeel!"

The Iron Dragon didn't say a word, just kept walking. Caetus's icy eyes were piercing into Laxus, a silent beg for help, for mercy, for anything aside from the fate the raging raven had planned for him. Laxus just stood with the red lights blaring around him, surrounded by the bloody destruction Gajeel had left.

They deserved this, he told himself, whatever it was Gajeel was about to unleash on them, they deserved this. For every life they destroyed, for every child they'd taken from the streets, for every atrocity that had been employed in this place…

So why was it that Laxus had never felt so lost before?


	26. Chapter 26

Chapter 26:

Laxus was trying to find his way out but honestly he had no idea where he was going. He'd found the room they'd kept him in with little effort, but when they'd brought him in he'd been blind folded. He knew it was quite a journey in this maze-like place, but Bianca had done her job too well. These halls were designed not only to confuse visitors but also keep prisoners from escaping. Everything looked the same; cold, white, harsh edges made even more disorientating with the addition of flashing lights and the sound of an alarm.

Laxus had found little resistance in his trek. Whether or not it was a good sign, he wasn't sure. He just pushed himself forward. Soon he'd find what he was looking for. His only hope was that he didn't run into Gajeel. He should have stopped him, should have gotten him under control… but he hadn't. He'd let him go. The haunting look in Caetus's eyes still followed him and every now and then a scream would pierce the dark halls.

Laxus came to a crossroads. He stood in the center and looked down both passages. To the left, the red lights faded and a door lit with bright white stood at the end of the hall. It was a heavy door with several automatic locks. He narrowed his eyes. An exit?

He started down that direction when a sound like a shuffle made him halt in his place. He looked behind him to the hall he hadn't taken. The scarlet lights were still flashing down 20 or 30 feet before coming to a dead end. There were a few doors but they were all closed. He steeled himself and headed towards the first door. He tried the nob. It was locked, again with an automatic lock, there would have been no way to open it from the outside. He paced down to the second and glanced at the door, saw it too had an automatic lock and passed it by.

The third door he could already tell was different. It had a keypad next to it and seemed to be meant for industrial purposes instead of security. He tried the nob but it too seemed to be locked. He eyed the keypad and placed his hand against it, using his electricity to short it out and unlock the door. He pushed it open and gazed into the dark. Scarlet spilled into the room with every flash of light, causing deep black shadows to be cast against the walls. There was another wall of tv screens, but there wasn't an office desk in the center of this much larger room. Instead, there were small sofas and lounges scattered about.

He took a couple steps in, his eyes scanning the shadows. He sent out a few bolts of lightning, illuminating what looked to be controls on the wall. He trained his eyes on the screens as he stalked over, a sick feeling beginning to coil in his gut. He flipped on a switch and immediately felt the hum of energy as everything was brought to life. One after another, each screen flipped on to a different room, although a few were just pulling up static. His eyes widened with dread as he realized one of the rooms was the one he'd been kept in, Gajeel's cell, several other similarly styled and empty rooms, and a few that had figures shivering in the corners.

The realization hit him as he pulled his eyes away to look back at the sofas and his stomach rolled and he felt like he was going to vomit. Laxus backed slowly out of the room, disgust making his stomach roll dangerously. He turned, deciding to himself that whatever it was he'd heard must have been an echo or a trick of the chaos in his mind. As he stepped towards the exit, his eyes caught sight of movement. He froze.

The second door was barely cracked open.

He quieted the lightning that was beginning to spark around him. He stepped forward with as much stealth as he could muster, sliding up next to the door and wrapping his fingers around the nob. He waited and listened, and finally swung the door open. The hinges groaned as he stepped into the doorway. His eyes alighted on only a console full of switches and speakers and flashing buttons and a wall of computers with what Laxus could only imagine was every room in the entire building. This was the room where the alarm was pulled and Laxus realized this would be his ticket to unlocking the cells.

But who had opened the door?

He glanced around and saw no one. There wasn't anywhere to hide, only a singular chair for whomever used to work here. There were no lockers, no closets… it was barren. He took a breath, trying to taste any scent on the air, and came up short. He gripped the edge of the door and slowly stepped in, everything in his body screaming that there was something wrong. The hair on the back of his neck stood on end and as he advanced.

A sigh, barely a breath of wind, slithered past his face and suddenly pain laced through his leg. He screamed and dodged, trying to get away from whatever had just assaulted him. He stumbled and fell against the wall, pain making it unbearable to put too much pressure on his leg. He growled, electricity snapping at the air around him.

"Who the fuck is there!" he snapped, pushing himself from the wall and managing to stand even if weakly, "Fight me head on!"

He felt like the light had been sucked out of the room. A silhouette began to take shape in the middle of the floor. It warped and shimmered into view, a flickering form of a woman, and suddenly long black flowing locks draped around her. Instead of the strange lustrous eyes he remembered seeing, she was staring at him with the cold, golden eyes of a reptile. She took in a quiet breath and bared sharp teeth at him. Instead of supple feminine hands she had quiet talons and a serrated blade in her hand.

"A chameleon…" Laxus breathed as she approached, "It would fucking figure."

She didn't offer him anything, no petty laugh, no sly smile. She lunged at him, brandishing her knife as she moved for him, eyes cool and murderous. He dodged out of the way and struck her with the full force of his lightning. She screeched and tumbled back as he launched another bolt of lightning at her. She somehow managed to evade his attacks one after another, slipping like a whisper of fog just out of the way.

Suddenly, she was in front of him, eyes brimming with malice as she struck out at him. This time, she wasn't quick enough. He gripped onto her wrist and gave her all he could, his stomach twisting as she screamed in pain from the attack. She disappeared again, this time materializing beside the door. He lunged at the door, sent a bolt into her path so she'd be forced to stop her flight. He grabbed a hold of her wrist and slammed her against the wall, hearing the air rush out of her lungs at the collision. Roughly, he took his free hand and held the back of her neck and forced her down, restraining her on the ground as she weakly tried to get away.

"Stop moving, don't make this any harder than this has to be," Laxus breathed, kicking the knife out of reach so it skittered to the center of the room, "Don't make me hurt you."

She thrashed beneath him but he held her easily until her fighting become more and more futile. She was breathless, her cheek scratched and marred from where he held her against the ground. The reptilian claws receded and her hands were once again soft. He couldn't see her eyes but he figured that they too had probably resumed their regular hue as she quieted.

Laxus cast his eyes about. He had nothing he could use to restrain her and he still needed to unlocked the cells and find a way to contact Natsu. He glanced up to the monitors and his eyes trained on a figure standing in the middle of one of the rooms.

"Gajeel…" he breathed, shock filling his soul at the sight. Where he was, Laxus had no way of telling for sure, but he lumbered into the room like a nightmare. He gazed around, eyes scanning for any sign of life, and then suddenly pointed at the camera and fired glittering iron to take it out, "Shit."

"Indeed,"

Laxus felt himself being thrown against the wall. He screamed out as Bianca was on top on him in and instant, shoving the knife into his shoulder and causing searing pain to spread throughout his chest. He gripped on her wrist, trying in vain to relieve the pain and pressure of the blade. She straddled him, clearly confident in herself as she brought her hand up to grip Laxus's chin.

"I'm surprised you know what a chameleon is… there's not a lot of us left anymore…" she sneered at him, her tongue black as she ran it against her teeth, "A little lesson since you're too dimwitted to realize it by now, as soon as you take your eyes off me I might as well be invisible."

She twisted the blade and he screamed. He could feel his muscles and tendons ripping and the blood was pouring from his wound to cover his chest.

"It's so sad such a good boy like you has to die in a place like this," she whispered, "I almost feel bad for it. You had me right where you wanted me…"

She twisted the blade again and he tasted the tang of blood in his mouth. His mind was swimming from the intense pain and his arm was shaking from the shock of it. He glared at her vehemently even as her fingers turned back into talons.

"You really should have just killed me… but being the chivalrous little Fairy Tail mage you are, you just don't have it in you. Thank you for that," she smirked and ripped out the blade, the serrated edge causing even more searing pain so that he clutched at the open wound in an effort to relieve it. She pressed the knife to his throat, "It's a shame… you were such a handsome young man."

Suddenly, an iron punch had her cartwheeling across the room and slamming into the only piece of furniture in the place. Laxus wheezed, not even attempting to lift himself up as blood loss was quickly making him become queasy. He glanced up at the door and was half relieved, half horrified to see Gajeel striding into the room. His ruby eyes were bloodthirsty and his arms and torso were covered with blood.

"Why don't you try me," he said with the same quiet in his voice that one feels just before the eye of a hurricane passes overhead, "I don't mind hitting women… just ask Lucy."

Bianca was scrambling to her feet. Blood was slipping from her mouth as she stood, pain clear in her eyes despite the strong façade she put on.

"I've been looking for you," Gajeel growled, "Have a present for you out in the hallway. He didn't last as long as I thought he would but I guess the guy did seem like a lightweight."

Bianca's eyes widened and flashed gold, "If you think you're going to rile me by killing someone so insignificant, you're wrong."

"It wasn't for you," Gajeel's smile widened, a wicked grin that sent a shiver down Laxus's spine, "The guy pissed me off. I wanted him alive when I killed you but I think the second shot of tranquilizers must have overdosed him."

Her eyes bulged slightly and her lips curved into a sly smile, "Kill me? You think you have the stomach, Fairy Tail Mage?"

Gajeel sighed as if the whole ordeal was taxing, "Fairy Tail? That's just the recent shit I've been up to."

Bianca's smile faded slightly as Gajeel took a step forward. His talons glistened with the sheen of blood and his scaled sparkled right from the light of the corridor. Laxus could feel the magic bubbling into the air, the tang of iron filled his nose and the tip of his tongue.

"Most people in your circuit don't know Gajeel Redfox very well," Gajeel advanced again and Bianca's smile faded completely, "I wonder if Kurogane might ring some bells?"

Laxus almost couldn't believe it but for the first time he saw fear fill the eyes of the demon who'd cause so much pain. She clenched her fists and her eyes darted to the knife that was still in the middle of the floor. She went to lunge for it but Gajeel had beaten her to it and with a resounding _thud_ he put all of his weight into a kick that sent her colliding into the monitors and falling with a sickening crunch onto the control panel and then the floor.

"You know what I think the worst way to die is, Bianca?" Gajeel growled as he crossed the room. She was trying to push herself up but couldn't quite manage to stay on her arms. Glass was sticking into her shoulder and back and the side of her face, making it so she couldn't open her left eye as she desperately tried to find purchase on the ground. Gajeel grabbed a hold of her hand and ripped her up, walking her across the room to throw her against the wall. She screeched from the pain as Gajeel pushed his foot against her chest, pinning her against the wall as she fought to get him off of her, "Personally, I'd say the worst way to die is to have your throat slit open… want to know why?"

Her eye was wide as she stared up at him. Her chest was rising and falling rapidly and she was desperately clawing at his leg as she tried to get away.

"It's not the wound that really kills you…" Laxus couldn't look away as Gajeel pressed the knife to her throat. Bianca let out a whimper, the last of her bravado gone as she stared death in the face.

"Gajeel… stop…" Laxus whispered, gripping onto his arm and trying to fight the dizziness he was feeling. This wasn't right.

"What kills you, in the end, is choking on your own blood… so you're just stuck there, praying someone finds you in time to save you… and while that happens, your mind starts hallucinating from lack of oxygen. Maybe you see your salvation, or more than likely you see whatever demons that have been chasing you at night… the pain you inflict on other people… For a woman like you, that's gotta be pretty scary, right?" Laxus turned away but he could still hear the knife slicing through flesh and the scream that soon became garbled and turned into chokes and gasps for air, "I heard what you said to Laxus about what happens if we don't pay attention… so don't worry, I'll wait right here with you. No one is going to save you."

Laxus heard a thud and despite the horror and disgust that was making his muscles seize, he turned to look at them. Bianca was laying on her side, blood pooling all around her as her golden eyes stared up at Laxus. She was reaching out towards him, black taloned fingers trying for one last attempt at salvation. Gajeel sat down next to her, his scales still glittering in the harsh light. He'd abandoned the knife at his side and just watched her with a look of disdain in his eyes. It felt like hours before the gasping slowed to a barely a wheeze and then stopped entirely. Gajeel moved slowly, taking a hold of her wrist and feeling for her pulse.

"You didn't have to kill her…" Laxus breathed as Gajeel finally lifted himself up from her, a dark look in his eyes as he approached, "There was enough here for the Magic Council to imprison her forever…"

"I know," he replied simply, gripping onto Laxus with bloodied hands.

When they finally walked out into sunlight, Natsu was there. The pinkette hadn't left as Laxus had thought, but had waited patiently for his two friends to make it out. He was shocked by the macabre sight of the two covered in blood and rushed to Laxus's side as he stumbled. Blood loss was finally taking its toll and he could see black edging into his vision.

Maybe he thought Laxus was too far gone to notice, or maybe he didn't even care in the first place, but as soon as Natsu took hold of Laxus Gajeel released him and walked numbly forward. After a few steps he sank to his knees on the forest floor. His iron shield dissipated and Laxus was able to make out bruises all along his tanned back.

"Gajeel…" Natsu's voice was muffled and far away.

"I just… I just need a minute…" the pain was clear in Gajeel's voice and Laxus could smell the salty tang of tears.


	27. Chapter 27

Chapter 27:

 _Gajeel's skin was on fire._

 _He was in the dark, praying for it to stop. This wasn't the Heat he was used to. This wasn't right. His body didn't belong to him anymore. It belonged to whoever had him pinned down and was sticking him with an endless number of needles. There were voices but no faces. People were speaking as if he weren't there listening, as if he weren't a person, as if he weren't alive._

 _"Nothing can ever be easy."_

 _He was strapped down on an examination table, an IV hooked to his arm. There was no relief. He arched his back and thrashed against his restraints, having just a little bit of his sound mind returning as the potion wore off. How many times had they done this? Three? Four? He could feel the leather giving way. If he could just pull a little harder he'd be free…_

 _"He's in heat… like a fucking aimal."_

 _He could hear footsteps. Not again. They weren't going to get that needle into him again…_

 _A flash of gold and the feeling of electricity striking through his veins. He could feel the searing heat of blood covering his fingers. A picture of Caetus's frozen eyes rolling back into his head as Gajeel shoved a needle into his neck. A scream of pain. The fear of the afterlife in the eyes of every man he could get a hold of._

 _It felt amazing to be doing this again._

 _Bianca's reptilian were eyes staring at him in terror – finally_ her _terror. He was watching her die. Her labcoat was a shimmering red dress that leaked from her throat and she was gasping for air. He could have killed her again if he'd had to… a hundred times and he'd still be burning for retribution for what she'd put him through… for what she'd put Laxus through… for those kids…_

Gajeel's eyes flew open.

He was gasping for air. A sick feeling in his stomach made him sit up in flight but he was quickly stopped by dizziness from the quick motion. He glanced around, squinting into the harsh white of a hospital room.

"Redfox?"

Gajeel snapped his head around to the sound of his voice. Laxus was sitting a few feet away on a hospital bed of his own. His shoulder had been bandaged and Gajeel could see the bright scarlet still trying to break through. That wound had been nasty and Gajeel was surprised to see him sitting up.

"You alright?" Laxus eyed him with clear worry on his face, "You're safe now… we're in Magnolia."

"Magnolia…" Gajeel was surprised to hear that name. They'd been transported and he'd been passed out through all of it? He was suddenly very aware of how sore his body was. All of his joints ached and as he glanced down at his arms he noticed the yellows and greens of healing bruises. His wrists had it the worst, "How long have I been out?"

"About three days… although they said as soon as you woke up you could probably leave."

"How's yer arm? That serrated blade… must've been rough…"

"Could have been worse."

The words hung in the air like the smoke from a cigarette. Gajeel just stared down at his hands. They were clean and smooth, tanned skin. No more blood. No more restraints. He remembered vividly what he'd done when he'd finally gotten free. He'd enjoyed it even and didn't regret a single action he'd taken, except maybe that Laxus had seen him like that. The man he was that day wasn't who he was anymore… it wasn't who he wanted to be.

"Listen… about… Bianca…" Gajeel swallowed, balled his fists into the pure white blankets covering him, "I don't want you to think… well… shit… that's not…"

He jumped at the sound of Laxus shifting on the bed. He stood, wincing slightly as the movement caused his shoulder pain, and walked wordlessly to Gajeel's bed. He sat down with a huff beside the stricken Iron Mage, his breath slightly more labored than before.

"Do you want to talk about it?" the words sounded strange coming from Laxus and the blonde didn't make eye contact as he spoke but his voice was low and concerned and it took Gajeel back to hear it.

"I…" he leaned a little from the Lightning Dragon, put off by the closeness. This wasn't what he needed right now. If anything, he wanted space, "I don't know."

Laxus was still for a moment, taking a moment to massage the area around his wound, "I wasn't around here when the attack on Phantom Lord happened… I know Mirajane had told me before you were S-Class. I guess I didn't really believe it."

Gajeel didn't speak, just listened and found the whole exchange strange. Laxus was talking to him… seriously talking to him… the way comrades do. It wasn't something Gajeel was used to coming from the usually silent and observant man, "But that look you got in your eyes… honestly, it was terrifying."

"Yeah… I don't… that's not me. That was who I used to be but since I'd joined Fairy Tail I never had to…" he ran his tongue against the backside of his teeth as if the name might leave a poisonous film on the inside of his mouth, "be Kurogane."

"So… Bianca knew who Kurogane was." Laxus regarded him quietly, golden eyes glimmering down at him. Gajeel didn't meet his gaze.

"Well… I mean… It was… I was known for taking down targets. Most people in her type of field didn't want to hear that Kurogane was being sent after them."

"Shit… I didn't know that," Laxus breathed.

"No one does… not even Lily."

There was a long moment of silence before Laxus mustered up the courage to speak, "Why?"

"It's not exactly something I'm proud of."

"So why?" Laxus's voice took an edge to it and Gajeel regarded him coolly, "So then why do it? Why bring back the part of yourself you hate so much?"

Gajeel dropped his gaze to his hands, "You're naiive, Laxus."

Laxus looked startled, as if Gajeel's words had taken him off guard. Those golden eyes relected confusion back at the Iron Mage. Gajeel refused to look at him, just kept his eyes and head down.

"Do you know what happened to Jose Porla after the fall of Phantom Lord?"

"No… no I don't."

"He was sentenced to ten years… given a slap on his wrist for starting a guild war and in the aftermath, when the underbelly of Phantom Lord was exposed he was left looking like an angel."

"Eh? How?" Laxus's voice was barely a breath in between them. His eyes widened and Gajeel drew his eyes up to meet his gaze.

"It seems Aria orchestrated everything… or that's what they told the Magic Council. Master Jose claimed he had no idea what shit had taken place within his own walls. In the end, he disowned all of us and when the dust cleared everyone thought that he was just an unfortunate man who got the wrong guy to be his second in command… well, everyone except Gramps."

Laxus's brow furrowed as Gajeel spoke. As he continued, Laxus could begin to see the malice in Gajeel's eyes. He was running his tongue against his fangs and gripping the sheets between his fists.

"People like Bianca… Jose… they never get what's coming for them… not really," when he finally dragged his eyes up to meet Laxus's, they were cold and hard and once again had that disturbingly calm look, "they always have a fall guy. If Caetus had made it out alive it would have been him, or anyone else she could get her hands on to take the blame. _If_ she got jail time she'd buy her way out or find one of her clients that can't live without her life's work to buy her out instead. A couple months of laying low and she'd be out doing business again… hell, maybe not even that long give her talents."

Laxus didn't move, didn't speak, hell he hardly even breathed. Gajeel felt a tsunami of emotion swelling up inside of him.

"Say what you want about me, about my choice. Call me a monster or say it was the madness from whatever drugs they put into me if it helps you sleep at night. But if you gave me the option to turn back time there's only one thing I'd do differently,"

"Yeah?" Laxus didn't know this side of Gajeel, didn't even pretend to know. He wasn't just vehement, he was malicious and filled to the brim with hate. Laxus could see the man in the hall again blanketed in red light with blood dripping from his hands. He even called himself a monster, "And what's that?"

"I'd find a way to kill her sooner."

The two locked eyes, Gajeel's shimmering rubies and Laxus's liquid gold. Gajeel didn't know what response he'd expected from the lightning mage but it wasn't that he'd reach out and put his hand atop his raven locks. He pulled Gajeel's forehead into his chest and against the protest of his wounded arm he wrapped himself around Gajeel. He could feel him shaking and to his utter surprise Gajeel didn't resist or pull away. He folded like a house of cards once it met a stray breeze. He gripped onto Laxus's shirt as if it were his lifeline and pressed his face into the fabric. He'd never appreciated the way the blonde had smelled before. He smelled like Fairy Tail and clear air, like home.

"Tch…" he clicked his teeth as he sqeezed his eyes shut. Why was there a lump forming in his throat? And why did his chest suddenly feel so tight? He was clutching onto Laxus like a child and he almost hated himself for it, "What is this… fucking weakness?"

"Probably…" Laxus muttered, refusing to glance down even as the smell of tears began to fill the air, "You know how Fairy Tail Mages are…"

"Yeah… it must be rubbing off." Gajeel bit his lip. He hated it, but despite his inhibitions, he sat there in Laxus's arms and cried.


	28. Chapter 28

Chapter 28:

Laxus was reclining at the bar, his arms crossed as he stared lazily across the guild. Mirajane was gossiping to a couple of the girls at the bar, talking about whatever their latest shopping yeilded and something about a novel Lucy was writing. Natsu was picking a fight with Gray and yelling about something that had happened on their last mission he had yet to pay for. Erza was enjoying some dessert and talking to Gramps about the best way to use her requip magic. Laxus hadn't thought there would be a day where he longed for this homey raucus the way he did now. This normal had found some way to sedate him despite the occasional barfights.

He just wished he could find Gajeel feeling the same.

It had been almost three weeks since they'd taken down Bianca and her underground empire. Twenty-three boys had been rescued and either moved out to the care of volunteers or a few guilds who were willing to take them in. Fourteen bodies had been found, all of which had been terribly mutilated aside from one, a slim man who looked to have overdosed. The acts were ruled as self defense, and aside from a lengthy statement from the Iron Dragon about what had happened to him when he had been locked in the sordid place, no action was taken against the man who had finally taken down the vilest human trafficking ring in Fiore.

Instead of being proud or even just accepting that the battle had been won, Gajeel seemed to want nothing more than to wash his hands of everything and drown himself in alcohol. Laxus could count on one hand how many times he'd seen the raven at the guild and each time he'd seen the same dark fatigue in his eyes. On occasion, he'd overhear Pantherlily talking to Wendy; asking about what could be done of nightmares or the best way to bring up to him that he needed to get out of the house and try to be more himself. Laxus had just gritted his teeth and returned to his drink.

He'd tried only once to reach out to Gajeel and it had gone about as well as he'd expected it would. Laxus was learning more and more about himself as of late, and one of the things he'd learned was that he could never quite put into words exactly what he meant. Gajeel had gotten angry and left, grumbling about how Laxus should mind his own business, he would deal with his problems the way he always had… which apparently meant shutting himself away from his friends and guildmates as he slowly drank himself to death.

It had been four days since the last time Gajeel had been to the guild and although he knew it was stupid, Laxus still caught himself glancing at the door. He'd been trying to think of something to say. It was strange, but every since the day in the hospital he found he wanted to be there for him… he wanted to help him through this.

After all the shit they'd been through, why couldn't he find a way even to do that…?

"Thinking about someone, Laxus?" Mira's cheeky voice caught him off guard and he immediately felt heat flush up his neck. She smiled sweetly at him, her azure eyes sparkling with something more like curiosity than mischief.

"Mira…" he hushed her and it only seemed to widen her smile, "Do you have to see right through me?"

"Have you spoken to him recently?" she poured him a drink and waived him off when he offered a few jewels, "He doesn't seem his usual self."

"I tried, it didn't go over too well," he sighed and took a sip of whatever Mira had poured him. It tasted as strong as it smelled and burned as it glided down his throat.

"So now big bad Laxus is stuck here pining for his love… how romantic," she flashed that sweet smile of hers that never failed to light up the room, "I should tell Lucy about it so she can add it into her novel."

He rolled his eyes and managed a half-hearted smirk back at her, "I'm surprised you think shit like that would sell."

"Two angry men bonding over their emotional turmoil and falling in love? Of course it would sell. Just ask Erza,"

Laxus choked on his beer and Mira stifled a giggle at his expense. He tried to be as graceful as possible wiping his mess from his chin and table, shooting Mira a playful glare.

"You know too much about your comrades," he huffed, trying to hide his smile as he brushed the damp on his hands off on his pants. She tilted her head to the side and looked at him innocently before quickly switching the topic of discussion back to Gajeel, her face taking on a more concerned air to it as she furrowed her brow.

"I heard he was kidnapped by those people… do you know what happened?"

"Not everything… just what I saw with my own eyes… and what he said in his statement."

"You say that as if they contradict each other," Mira's hand was balled at her chest as she spoke, worry clear on her features, "You think he's lying?"

"I think he's downplaying it," Laxus sighed, "I don't know why. Maybe he just doesn't want to admit what happened."

"But why…?"

"I don't really know… I don't know if talking to him about it would help any or…"

"Or…?" she prompted him, a level of understanding in her voice.

"…or if I can stand to hear it."

She sighed and crossed her arms, an act that for Mirajane always seemed to look more like she was holding herself than showing agitation. He could tell she was thinking before she spoke and her eyes were dancing with negative emotions, something that rarely could grace her features.

"It's not like you to be so unsure of yourself Laxus," she murmered and at first he wasn't quite sure she was speaking directly at him. She tilted her head to the side, "I think you're trying too hard."

Laxus clicked his teeth at her and she smiled sweetly at him, "Come on, Laxus, you like him don't you?"

He blinked at her, not willing to answer the question.

"And you want to help him through this?"

"Mm…"

Mira rolled her eyes, "Why don't you take him out…? On a date?"

Laxus snorted, sarcasm dripping from his voice in response, "Oh yes, perfect idea. I'm sure he'd love that,"

"Why wouldn't he?" Mira's tone was sharp and it silenced the Lightning Mage immediately, "Take him somewhere he'd enjoy himself. Get his mind off of the bad things for a while."

Laxus noticed the smug look on Mira's face as he started considering what exactly it was she was saying. Whenever he would go through a rough time, doing something he enjoyed often helped. And hell, even he had to admit that having Juvia talk him down when he was in a dark place was something he had desperately needed. Maybe he could be that for Gajeel?

"I'll admit it, Mira, it's an idea," Laxus conceded, "But, hell, I don't even know what he's into-"

"He likes jazz and gothic music… the gritty kind, not the moody kind," she smiled at him as she cut him off, her eyes lighting up as she started planning, "And a new lounge just opened up on the far side of Magnolia. It's expensive to get in and you'll need to dress for the occasion. Maybe you should check and see what shows are coming up?"

Laxus cocked his eyebrow at her, "You don't actually think this is going to work do you? As soon as I ask him he'll probably tell me to fuck off. He can't stand me, Mira."

"I'm sure that's not the case, Laxus…"

"It is."

Mira sighed, "Well you'll just have to work through that, won't you?"

Laxus stilled whatever he was about to say. Mira's blue eyes were masterfully hiding the emotions she was battling with. She still had feelings for him and here he was seeking her advise on how to date someone else who probably didn't reciprocate those feelings. The always sweet person Mira was probably had already decided that she would just prefer to see him happy, or even more likely, that by helping him achieve something with someone else she'd finally drop whatever she had for him. She was infinitely kind. Anyone would be lucky to have her one day.

He almost felt guilty for it all.

"Shit, Mira, you make it sound easy," he breathed at last, taking another sip of his beer, "What the hell do I even say?"

"Laxus… you don't expect me to give you _all_ the answers, do you?" she grinned and snatched away his glass. She shooed him away from the bar and he landed heavily on the ground, the loud thuds of his boots catching some curious eyes. She flipped her silver hair over her shoulder, "Just be yourself."

"Be myself…? What kind of shitty advice is that?" he smirked down at her as he grabbed his bag off of the floor.

"Bad or not that's all I have left for you," she smiled, "You're so hopeless I've already exhausted myself trying to help you,"

"Yeah yeah," he huffed as he headed for the door. His stomach was already starting to knot dangerously. He started out towards Gajeel's house, wracking his brain on how he was supposed to ask the Iron Dragon to go out with him.

 _Go out with him_.

He snorted at how ridiculous just thinking about it made him feel. He sounded like a kid asking his crush out to the playground. This was fucking _Gajeel Redfox_. What the hell was he supposed to say? Hey, I know you went through a terrible time a few weeks ago but I have feelings for you so let's give it a shot?

Hell. Fucking. No.

There was no way he'd go for that. So what was he supposed to say? He was running scenarios in his head as he walked, his face showing the growing agitation he felt. This would never work. Gajeel would shut him down before he even uttered a full sentence.

 _"Gajeel, a new jazz lounge just opened up, wanna go check it out?"_

 _"Gajeel, would you like to go hang out? This new place just opened and I think you'd like it."_

 _"Gajeel, I was wanting to go check out this jazz place, want to come?"_

No. Just no.

He was coming up to the street where Gajeel lived and promptly walked past it. There was no point traipsing all the way up there when he didn't even know what to say. He gritted his teeth and shoved his hands into his pockets.

 _"Hey man, I just got these tickets and wanted someone to go with me…"_

 _"You doing anything this weekend? There's a show at the new jazz place and I thought maybe you'd like to go."_

 _"I got this tickets from a mission…"_

He stopped his march.

That might work. He could just say that he got the tickets as a reward from a mission. Gajeel hadn't been at the guild in so long that there really was no way for him to know either way. He could go buy them now and bring them… just to validate the story a little more.

He could do that. This could work.

Laxus quickly corrected his course and headed for the far side of Magnolia, where the more high-end people lived. The place was called The Garden's Edge and it was seemingly empty, something that was perfectly normal given the time of day. He was awkward as he ordered the tickets and as he left he felt like his head was swimming.

He was doing this… Mavis' sakes, he was actually doing this…

In no time he was in front of Gajeel's house, his mind still completely muddled from how incredulous he felt. He walked up the shabby steps and stood in front of the door, hesitating before making his next move. When was the last time he felt this nervous? He took in a deep breath and for a moment cleared his mind.

He knocked coolly, trying to look indifferent as he stood in front of the door. He stood for a few moments after there was no response and then knocked again. After a few more moments of silence he tried peering into on of the windows. The place was dark and he had a hard time seeing much from the glare of the sun. He knocked again, this time more fiercly, and heard the shuffle of someone coming to reply.

The door creaked lazily open and Laxus's eyes widened at the raven standing in front of him. It was obvious he'd just woken up. His ruby eyes were groggy and almost glossed over from drink. He squinted as he looked up at Laxus.

"Sparky? The hell're you doin' here?" he growled, crossing his arms and straightening just slightly. He was an utter mess. His hair was in tangles and he was just in a pair of worn out pants. Laxus tried to hide how stricken he felt at his sight. Were there fresh scratch marks on his arms? What the hell from? Laxus couldn't help furrowing his brow in concern at the shock of red he could see curling around Gajeel's wrist.

"Uh…" he did his best to shake of the unease he was feeling, "So… you… you like jazz music, right?"

Gajeel blinked slowly, his befuddled mind sluggishly processing what Laxus had just said, "Depends."

"Right…" why was he so awkward? He wanted to disappear, "So I got a couple tickets for that place that just opened up, The Garden's Edge, and the singer for tomorrow is this guy Wilson Benson, figured you might want to see him."

"Wilson Benson? Really?" his crimson eyes lit up and in the sun's light they sparkled like marvelous rubies, almost a deep blood orange color instead of his usual scarlet hue, "He's pretty good."

"I take it you want to go then?" Laxus smirked.

"Yeah… I kind of do…" Gajeel scratched at the back of his head, the light leaving his eyes just as suddenly as it had appeared. Something darkened his features suddenly and he glanced back of his shoulder at something in the house.

"Great, so I'll swing by tomorrow at about 5:30," Laxus couldn't stop the smile that came to his face and Gajeel seemed surprised.

"Yeah," Gajeel's voice sounded distant and Laxus turned to hop off the porch, some of his bravado returning.

"Oh, and this place is formal so try to look decent. I don't want us getting kicked out because of your sorry ass."

Challenge filled Gajeel's eyes and he immediately bit back wryly, "Just try not to be jealous when I'm the one turnin' heads and yer not."

"Yeah yeah," Laxus waived over his shoulder, barely containing himself as he walked down the street. He was almost walking on air as he headed home, his arms crossed behind his head as he watched the large puffy clouds of early fall whisping by overhead. The corner of his lip turned up into a smug grin.

Gajeel had actually said yes.


	29. Chapter 29

Chapter 29:

Laxus was pulled from his sleep by a knock at his door. It started as a quiet, polite rap but soon turned into and impatient pounding. He raised his head off the pillow and glanced around drowsily, lifting himself up on his arms as he listened and hoped that whoever it was would just assume he wasn't home and leave. Silence ensued for a moment before an ever-sweet voice called from outside.

"Laxus! I know you're home, open up!" Mirajane called melodiously. He groaned and rubbed his face into his pillow one more time before finally pulling himself out of bed.

He opened the door a crack and glared down at the snowy-haired woman. She smiled at him despite his scowl.

"It's eight in the morning, Mirajane. What do you want?" he growled at her.

"We're just here to help you with your date tonight," she grinned.

"We?" he glanced past her and saw a shock of blue hair. Juvia stood awkwardly behind her, clearly having been forced to come herself. She smiled sheepishly at him, "No."

"No?" Mira looked almost dejected, "What do you mean no?"

"I don't need any help…" his eyes cut over to Juvia, "And it ain't a date."

Mira's smile widened, "Oh, you need all the help you can get," with what could have been a dainty push she slammed the door back, knocking Laxus in the side of the face. While he was recovering she slid past the opening with Juvia in tow.

"Dammit Mira! Just mind your own business for once!" he growled, rubbing the side of his jaw.

She blatantly ignored him and marched on to his room. Juvia tiptoed quietly after, her large eyes taking in the rooms as she passed them. He gritted his teeth and followed them, immediately finding his bedroom in shambles as Mira ripped apart his closet. Juvia hesitantly took a seat on his bed, her eyes gliding over burn marks on his walls and ceilings from nights where he'd gotten too angry and let loose.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Laxus growled as Mira threw yet another shirt onto the floor.

"Well…" she sighed, putting her hands on her hips, "There's no way around it, we'll have to go shopping."

"Mira! I don't need to go shopping!" Laxus snapped, snatching up some shirts from the floor, "What I have is fine!"

She turned on him, a flash of she-devil in her eyes, "You want to make a good impression, don't you?"

"What does Gajeel care what I wear?" he roared back at her, advancing to the challenge in her eyes.

Juvia's reluctant voice came from beside them, stealing all the fire out of him as she spoke, "Gajeel has decent fashion sense…"

He snapped his head around to look at her and she glanced down at her hands, "That is… Gajeel helps Juvia pick out dresses for dates… he will probably look his best too…"

"That settles it, then," Mira beamed triumphantly and Laxus let out an exasperated sigh, "We're going. Get dressed!"

Laxus huffed as he grabbed his shirt from the day before and pulled it on. Mira sat comfortably on his bed and Juvia's navy stare was hyper focused on the ground. The poor woman had probably been scared into coming along. He pulled his jeans over his shorts and walked out, listening to the hurried patter of their feet behind him as he stopped to grab his headphones.

"Where are you taking me?" Laxus muttered as Mira led the way into the morning sunlight.

"Well, we need to get you a suit- "

"I _have_ a suit- "

"And it probably wouldn't hurt to have some new shoes… and maybe a watch."

"A watch?"

"Oh, come now Laxus, every formal man needs a watch. Isn't that right, Juvia?"

"Juvia thinks it would complete the outfit…"

"There you have it!" Mira sang happily.

Laxus just rolled his eyes and pushed his hands into his pockets. He followed them as Mira chattered away happily, leading them down a street with some clothes shops and restaurants. She ushered them into a store with expensive looking suits in the windows and immediately took to the racks, pulling out shirts and ties that honestly Laxus would probably never have touched if he were here on his own.

"You know, some lavenders and blues would be good to add to your wardrobe. You're always in purple and yellow. You should really mix it up a bit…" Laxus just followed behind Mirajane as she babbled away, criticizing his sense of fashion and picking out shirts in almost every shade of blue imaginable. Juvia was looking at some dark grey vests and speaking to a slim man as he pointed out different styles.

Suddenly, Mira threw the shirts she had collected into Laxus's arms and rushed him towards the changing rooms, muttering something about Magnolia being too small of a town.

"The fuck, Mira…?" Laxus growled just as a dinging noise made it to his ears from the front door. His eyes widened as he glimpsed black hair and suddenly Mira pulled the curtain shut to the dressing room, "Was that Gajeel?"

"Shhhh!" Mira hushed him, "Now hurry up and get dressed! I'm trying to keep him from knowing you're here!"

"What the hell does it matter?" he snapped back at her in a whisper, throwing the mountain of clothes on the bench. Her eyes widened and his heart sank a little bit. She stuck out her bottom lip as if he'd just made her upset and he crossed his arms in defeat.

"It'll ruin the magic if he sees you early, Laxus…" she batted her eyelashes at him, "I just want to make your date special… am I not helping?"

"Fine, Mira, do whatever you want," he resigned and she smile triumphantly. She waved at him as if to signal him to start getting dressed and he complied, working his way through at least twenty shirts she'd picked out. He could hear Juvia from across the store, laughing nervously about how she was there shopping for Gray. Gajeel's voice was approaching their direction and damn him if Laxus didn't suddenly feel nervous.

"…I'm just happy you're finally getting out of the house," Pantherlily piped happily, receiving only a grunt in reply, "it wouldn't hurt to get a full suit, anyway. You never know when you might need it. Your white one is too gaudy for special occasions."

"It's a stage costume." Gajeel growled. He sounded tired, like this whole ordeal was draining for him. Laxus wrinkled his nose at the faint smell of cigarettes as he took the stall next to him. Did Gajeel smoke? He'd never seen him doing it before. Come to think of it, he'd seen Gajeel both early in the morning and late at night and he'd never even had a pack on him. So what was this?

"You should try wearing something other than red. When you're not wearing black, you're wearing red. Some more color wouldn't hurt. You've got such dark skin you could try orange or yellow…"

Gajeel didn't reply and Laxus busied himself with his own wardrobe change. He slipped on several different shirts and regarded them all dispassionately, although he could see Mira's face light up over a few of them. For hours, she kept bringing him different things as they danced around the only other two patrons in the small store, dashing just out of sight around columns or mirrors or hiding back in the dressing room. Juvia finally walked over to Laxus's room after Gajeel had left, sighing in relief that she could finally stop her charade. She'd been helping Gajeel pick out an outfit in an effort to keep him from seeing Laxus, knowing too well how upset Mira would get if they were to accidentally bump into each other.

In the end, Mira had actually gotten him in blue. The tailor grinned as he walked out, sporting a white shirt, maroon vest with matching tie, and navy jacket and pants. He had to admit that it actually didn't look half bad for being out of his comfort zone and he could tell Mira was elated. Juvia gave him the final touch, a watch that she'd picked out. He narrowed his eyes at how rosy her cheeks were and she muttered something that sounded like 'how romantic' as she fastened the leather strap around his wrist.

He paid for the ensemble, pretending not to shudder inwardly at the price, and sauntered out into the cool afternoon air. Juvia left them and it was just he and Mira for the trek towards Laxus's house. He heard her sigh contentedly and he chanced a glance over at the blue-eyed woman.

"I wish you would have let me do this kind of thing when _we_ were dating," she had a sour smile on her face as she spoke and she was fidgeting beside him, "Maybe I would have nagged you less about how you dressed."

"Oh, I'm sure you would have found something to get onto me about… if not my clothes then probably my hair," he joked back at her, trying to lighten the mood a little. She smirked.

"Well, you know that's next. You should probably part it for tonight… or slick it back,"

"Nah, you got me dressed up but I'll be damned if you touch my hair," he grinned back at her.

They stayed in silence for a moment. She obviously wanted to say something that Laxus wasn't sure he wanted to hear, so instead they just walked with only the sound of the clicking of his new shoes to ease the cool quiet.

"You're so intimidating, Laxus,"

"Huh?" he looked over at Mira whose eyes were cast to the sky.

"You're so quiet and you have this stern look in your eyes… some people find it hard to talk to you because of it,"

"Thanks for the honesty," he grunted, trying not to bristle at her words. She just laughed lightly.

"I'm just trying to help you," she flashed him a small smile but for some reason it didn't quite make it to her eyes, "You're so strong that sometimes weaker mages see you as being this untouchable thing, like you're above everyone else. Your silence can come across as callous or even critical…"

"I get it, I'm an asshole."

"That's not what a mean," Mirajane stopped him, her large blue eyes meet his golden with a quiet storm in them, "you and Gajeel both have a fear of weakness. What I'm trying to say is… you know he's been through something traumatic and you want to help him work through it. Maybe what he needs, what would help him, is for you to show a little weakness."

He blinked at her, obviously not following what she was saying and she sighed, a hopeless look on her features.

"Just some tips that might help for tonight: make eye contact when he's talking to you, let him know you're listening. Don't let him get drunk… Show him you're having a good time and enjoying his company."

"This isn't my first date, Mira," Laxus huffed, looking away from her. She was trying to help but he didn't like how sad she seemed while doing it.

She shot him a wicked grin, "I thought you said this wasn't a date?"

He immediately felt heat shock his neck and sting the tops of his ears. He gave her a weak smile and she laughed happily. She took the bag that held his clothes from earlier that morning and waved him off.

"It's after 5:00, I'll take these back to your house for you,"

"Oh… thanks…" he reached for his keys but she was already walking away.

"Don't worry, I still have a spare," she smirked at him, "Have fun tonight. Don't do anything I wouldn't do!"

"Yeah yeah," he sighed and headed towards Gajeel's house. The breeze picked up as he walked. He could smell autumn in the air and the leaves in the trees were starting to change color. In just a few short weeks Magnolia would be filled in the beautiful oranges and yellows of fall. For a second he wondered which season was Gajeel's favorite and then immediately cast the thought out of his mind and tried to ignore the way his heart seemed to pick up pace.

"Laxus, you're such a fucking kid," he growled to himself as he rounded the bend onto the shoddy street where Gajeel's house set just off the path. He could see a figure on the porch as he approached and stifled a smile as Gajeel's raven hair came into view. His hair was still long, if slightly more tamed than usual. He was also sporting maroon and navy, no doubt the doing of Juvia and Mira. His shirt was a few shades darker than his ruby eyes and he was wearing a navy vest and matching slacks. He wasn't wearing a tie, and instead had the top two buttons of his shirt open. In place of a suit jacket he was wearing a leather jacket.

"You look like a fucking yakuza," Laxus laughed as he approached and Gajeel shot him a keen look.

"Yeah? Well you look like Mira dressed you," he gihi-ed as he jumped off of the porch. Laxus had to admit, Gajeel looked kind of badass. He'd never considered a style like biker-formal existed until now.

"Laxus," Lily's harsh voice caught both of their attentions but Gajeel chose not to look back at him. Laxus lifted an eyebrow to the Exceed that was standing with crossed arms in the doorway of the house, "If you get him drunk, he's staying at your place."

He suddenly felt like there was enough tension to suffocate the three of them. Gajeel just barely looked over his shoulder at his smaller partner but the malice in his eyes were as clear as day. Had they been fighting earlier? That might explain why Gajeel had decided to wait out on the porch.

Damn, he'd never really been that good at diffusing situations.

"It's not a bar, Lily," Laxus tried to smile a bit, stuffing his hands in his pockets, "It's more like a theater…"

"You heard me," he growled and then turned and slammed the door. Laxus clicked his teeth and turned back to Gajeel who was already heading down the street, hands shoved into his pockets and eyes trained on the ground. Laxus caught up to him in a few long strides.

"What the hell was that about?" he huffed.

"He's just sick of my shit," Gajeel growled, not moving his eyes from their place on the ground, "He wants me to stop drinking."

Laxus noticed once again the bags under Gajeel's eyes and the shadows in his scarlet eyes. He tried to remember what Mira had said about silence but what the hell was he supposed to say? Everything about the iron dragon seemed to be steeped in misery. Laxus was supposed to find words to pull him out of it? He gritted his teeth. Mira would probably tell him to be positive. Actually, now that he thought about it, Gajeel tended to surround himself with positive people. Juvia, Levy… even Pantherlily was typically more upbeat, if in a more stern, militaristic way…

Shit, he was no good at this.

"I was planning on cutting you off at three anyway," Laxus hummed, "I ain't letting you drink me out of house and home."

Gajeel snorted, "I'm buying my own."

"Why would I let you do something stupid like that?" Laxus smirked down at the raven, "I asked you to come with me, I ain't making you pay."

Gajeel shot him a look, insistent, "I can buy my own."

"Just buy me a drink later,"

"Just let me buy my own drinks!"

"Fine," he put his hand on top of Gajeel's head as if he were going to ruffle his hair and the raven stiffened, "Last one there buys the drinks."

"Oi?"

He pushed Gajeel's head down and the Iron Dragon stumbled. Laxus took off, using his lightning to help him zip forwards a few meters. He could hear Gajeel swearing from behind him as he broke into a blind sprint.

"That's fucking cheating!"

"Try to keep up, Redfox!" Laxus called after him, powering down his magic and running as fast as he could. Laxus was already out of breath as he pushed himself. He'd never been a runner and Gajeel had more stamina when it came to sprinting. It wasn't long before the raven was running alongside him, his arms and legs pumping furiously as fought to take a lead.

Laxus stole a look over at him. He seemed so much more alive than just a few short moments ago. His eyes were light and swimming with energy. Laxus could even see a faint smile playing at his lips. He quickly overtook Laxus and the two ended up in front of the lounge gasping for breath. Laxus was doubled over with his hands on his knees, almost light headed from lack of oxygen. Gajeel laughed jauntily and smacked the Thunder Dragon on the shoulder.

"We need to work on your cardio," he huffed, "what, do you only lift weights? Where's your stamina?"

"I hate… running…" Laxus gasped, "I had no… idea… you were a distance… runner…"

"And you caught me at the bottom of my game," Gajeel grinned elatedly, "I haven't been jogging in over a month."

"Yeah…? shit…"

"I was going to start back up. Maybe you should come with me. Honestly, you're a little pathetic right now."

"Yeah, well, I still won," Laxus smirked, straightening and wiping the sweat from his brow.

"No, Sparky, _I_ won," Gajeel chuckled.

"You're right. _You_ won the race. But I said the loser was buying the drinks."

The dumbfounded look on Gajeel's face actually made Laxus howl with laughter. The Iron Dragon simmered as they approached the lavish entryway. Laxus handed in their tickets and a man in a black suit ushered them into a red-carpeted hall, but a flight of stairs, and to the balcony where a table set for two awaited them. The waiter held their chairs for them to sit and placed two crystal tumblers on the table, pulling out a bottle of amber liquid and filling their glasses before placing it on the table for them. He bowed slightly and then left, drawing the curtain so the two were left alone to view the show from above.

"When you said this place was fancy, you weren't kidding," Gajeel mused, eyes scanning over the railing that looked to be hand carved with intricate designs of angels and dragons and some other mythical beings, "Wonder how much it cost to build this place."

"Probably a fortune," Laxus muttered, unfolding his napkin and placing it over his lap, assuming that was the right thing to do. He had to be honest, he never really paid attention during Erza's etiquette lessons.

"Yeah? Bet you're gonna regret buying me drinks now," Gajeel took a sip of his drink and wrinkled his nose, "this stuff tastes expensive."

Laxus snorted, "Like you can tell how expensive that drink is."

Gajeel raised a studded brow, "Try it. It's smooth."

Laxus lifted the tumbler and sniffed at it. The acerbic smell attacked the inside of his nose like any drink, but hell, he was no connoisseur. It was incredibly smooth, though. He drank it heartily and easily emptied his glass. Laxus could hear Gajeel's I-told-you-so grin before he saw it.

"Goes down easy, huh?" Gajeel smirked.

"Gentleman, some starters before the show?" their waiter returned with a tray full of food. Gajeel's eyes seemed thoughtful for a moment and he looked down at his hands. Laxus furrowed his brow, trying to piece together his sudden reflection. Was he worried about the price? Or was it something more complicated than that?

"You allowed to just leave the tray?" Laxus asked smoothly and Gajeel's eyes widened.

"I… uh… you'll be charged for everything… is that alright?" the waiter stuttered, his mind obviously on the money he was going to be raking in off of the two men.

"S'fine," Laxus waived him to set it down and he bowed again and hurried off. Gajeel shot him a suspicious look.

"You blowing your life savings?" Gajeel muttered.

"Just half of it," Laxus smirked back at him, picking up something pink that could possibly be salmon but he wasn't quite sure, "You need to tell me what this shit is. I've never had it before."

"Why are you doing this?" Gajeel growled, crossing his arms, "Why did you take me here?"

His eyes were guarded and dark. He was staring off the balcony to the people below, keen eyes picking out waiters and following them as they made their rounds to different tables. He looked tired again and the shadows had returned to his face. Laxus studied him; his posture, the way his hands trembled slightly as he took another sip of his drink, the way he kept pulling at his shirt cuffs to hide something on his arms, the slight stink of tobacco that had never been there before. Laxus knew Gajeel had been in a dark place recently but maybe he didn't understand the scope of just how bad it really was for the Iron Dragon. It wasn't like the hardened, tenacious Gajeel Redfox to let something get him down like this. What exactly happened to him?

Again, Laxus was asking questions he didn't know the answers to. He felt a strong sense of déjà vu. Just like back when he had no memories of what had happened on their mission together, he was stuck speculating about Gajeel. He'd been hurt again.

Maybe he should just be honest, tell Gajeel what was going on. He was taking him on a date. He wanted to see if he could be the one to help him through the dark place he was at. Sure, he couldn't _fix_ Gajeel. But he could try to help maybe. After all, wasn't this somewhat on him as well? If he'd never left him alone out in the words out of his own cowardice – whether of Gajeel or himself, honestly, he wasn't sure anymore – then Gajeel wouldn't have been ambushed. Or maybe they both would have been ambushed. But at least he wouldn't have been alone in that tortuous place. If he'd gone to look for him sooner, he wouldn't have spent so much time in Bianca's hands. He could have looked after him, made sure he was safe. There were a million ways he could have helped or stopped what had happened and he'd failed every one of them.

He should just be honest… but he was worried his honesty might just make everything worse. What if it made Gajeel mad and he just stormed out of the lounge? Then what would that do? He'd lock himself up again and probably refuse to have anything to do with Laxus. He'd drink himself away and let the darkness eat him alive. Would it hurt to leave him in the dark for just one night if it meant he was out and happy and not alone to whatever self-destructive behavior he was prone to.

Laxus sighed and Gajeel started, his ruby eyes widening at the serious look in Laxus's eyes as he straightened and crossed his arms, "Honestly?"

"Honestly." Gajeel's jaw clenched and he looked flighty, as if he'd dash away the moment Laxus said something he didn't like.

"Redfox, I… um… I…" he chickened out, "I'm worried… about you."

Gajeel blinked slowly as if he were still processing Laxus's words, "Worried… about me."

"Yeah, I mean, you're not yourself,"

"Yeah?" his voice raised a little, "and how should I be?"

"Sirs," their waiter's voice silenced them both as he glided back into their booth and placed their entrées down, "…Enjoy."

There was a tense silence as they both stared at their food, neither of them wanting to eat but also not wanting to continue the conversation. Just then, the stage lit up and the lights around the lounge dimmed. There was a quiet applause as a man walked out onto the stage, guitar in hand, and sat on a singular stool. Laxus could barely see him from where they sat in the balcony, but he could tell the suit he was wearing was white and he was wearing a fedora. No wonder Gajeel liked him.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, how ya'll doin' tonight?" he hummed into the microphone with a voice that reminded him of the sound of gravel underfoot, "This first one is called Dearly Departed… I hope you enjoy,"

 _"You and I both know that the house is haunted…_

 _you and I both know that the ghost is me…_

 _Used to catch me in your bedsheets just a-rattling your chains…_

 _Well back then baby, it didn't seem so strange…"_

"So… this is Wilson Benson? Doesn't sound half bad," Laxus muttered into his drink, trying to alleviate some of the tension.

"Yeah," Gajeel sighed, picking up his fork and stabbing it into one of the appetizers. He popped the piece into his mouth and chewed absent-mindedly, his eyes truly sparkling like rubies in the dim light, "I like him because he's real… doesn't just sing about the good things. He makes music about stuff he's been through."

"Yeah? I'll have to pick up a record."

"You listen to records?"

"I know, it sounds dumb, but I like the added noise. I think it gives the music character… but everyone who listens to records says that,"

"You like what you like, there's nothing wrong with that."

"Yeah… I suppose."

 _"In the midnight hour, you came alive…_

 _I was looking for my crystal ball…_

 _Busy trying to charm that snake…_

 _When the sun came up we had no place to hide…_

 _And you had to tell your friends that my things were fake…"_

"It's crab, by the way," Gajeel mumbled, popping another piece of fish into his mouth.

"Crab, huh… I thought it would taste better,"

"Don't have expensive taste, Sparky?"

"Apparently not,"

 _"But even when one is dead and gone_

 _It still takes two to make a house a home_

 _Well I'm as lonesome as the catacombs,_

 _I hear you call my name but no one's there_

 _Except a ringing in the air…"_

Gajeel was on his second drink and his eyes were swimming already. He'd barely eaten which was a feat for this man who could usually consume his own weight in one sitting. Laxus was wracking his mind for something to say. The tense small talk was killing him and at this point his stomach was in his shoes. He'd wanted to show Gajeel some fun not force him into a dinner that he hated. He sighed.

Mira's words were bouncing around in his head. His silence was intimidating. His stare was calloused. If all that was true than Gajeel was probably ready to leave already. _Show some weakness…_ like what? He leaned back in his chair and stared at the stage. Gajeel finished the rest of his second drink, not even glancing in Laxus's direction, and poured himself another.

 _"You and I both know that the house is haunted…_

 _Yeah you and I both know that the ghost is me…_

 _You used to walk around screaming, all slamming all 'dem doors,_

 _Well now I'm all grown up now and I don't scare easy no more…_

 _Yeah you and I both know…"_

A light applause followed the end of the song and then Wilson cued a small band to start behind him. He rasped into the microphone something about the title and Gajeel seemed to perk up immediately.

"This one of your favorites?" Laxus tried to hide his amusement at seeing the raven's mood suddenly change. Red eyes danced his direction.

"Yeah, it's called Jackie and Wilson," he smiled, tipping back the last of the amber liquid and setting his glass down a little too hard on the table, "It's pretty great."

"What's it about?" Laxus pressed, desperately trying to keep the lighter conversation going.

"It's about a guy in a bar seeing a woman and just kind of… I dunno… filling in the blanks of that person's life,"

"I'm not sure what you mean."

Gajeel paused as he thought for a moment and to Laxus's delight he actually took a bite of what was in front of him, "You know… like seeing someone and imagining what your life would be like if they were a part of it? Like… imagining how that other person would complete you if they were part of your life."

"Sounds… strange…" Laxus muttered as he took a bite of his food, "I don't think I've ever done that before."

"Really?" Gajeel smirked, "All that silent brooding you do all the time and you've never thought about something like that?"

"It might surprise you to know this but I'm usually listening to music while I'm _silently brooding_."

"And?" Gajeel raised a studded eyebrow at him as he ate.

"And… that's it."

"You don't… feel anything when you're listening to music? It's just this noise that exists in the background of your life?"

Laxus chuckled, "It's listening to music, there's nothing complicated about it."

"Of _course,_ there's something complicated about it! It's music! It's a part of the maker's soul. It's emotional. It tells a story. You don't _just listen_ to music, you feel music, you live music… it's like a gift someone poured their time and energy into," Gajeel's eyes were alight with passion as he spoke and for the first time it was he making eye contact with Laxus. Laxus loved it. His eyes sparkled with the same light from earlier, during their race. He looked so much more alive. He latched onto it and threw his mind to finding something to keep Gajeel in this place, away from the negative. Maybe he could salvage the night after all.

"How do you know? Are you a songwriter?" Laxus shot him a wry smile.

"I am, yes," Gajeel narrowed his eyes at the blonde, "Why?"

Laxus was actually a little surprised. He knew Gajeel could play and sing but he didn't know the man actually wrote his own music. He leaned back and looked the raven up and down. He was such a brutish man. He just didn't look the type.

"I don't believe you," he proclaimed and Gajeel clicked his teeth, "Prove it."

"I ain't gotta prove anything," Gajeel growled, popping another bite into his mouth, "I know what I can do."

"Oh, come on. Just give me one verse," Laxus pressed.

Gajeel scratched the back of his head for a moment as if he were considering it and then shook his head, his ruby eyes sparkling with challenge, "You gotta get me a lot more drunk if you're gonna try to get a word outta me. And you already promised Lily you wouldn't let me drink too much."

"I promised Lily I wouldn't bring you home drunk," Laxus grinned wickedly, sliding the crystal decanter towards his ebony friend, "So all I have to do is make sure you've sobered up before you get home."

Gajeel blinked a couple of times, obviously thinking deeply about something as Laxus leaned his chin against his knuckles, watching. Reluctantly, the red eyed Gajeel poured himself his fourth glass and downed it, a slight blush coming to his cheeks from the heat.

"Well if you insist," was all he muttered in response.

The rest of the night seemed to pass in a blur of whiskey, gritty music, and the glitter of ruby gemstone eyes. Even Laxus had drunken enough not to care about the bill as it made its way to his hands and the two barely made it out of the lounge without a stumble. Laxus was trying to remember the way Gajeel's nose would wrinkle when he scowled as he looked for words to say, memorize the way he'd run his tongue against his teeth when he was thinking, or the way the left side of his mouth would pull upwards in a sideways grin when he thought he was being clever. A few times he'd wanted to mention how much he liked seeing the glisten of raucous mirth in those blood-filled eyes but even through the muddle of alcohol he knew there was a reason he shouldn't, although he couldn't quite remember exactly why.

The chill of the air snapped a small semblance of reason into the two as they made their way through the town. Gajeel was admittedly quite drunk and Laxus would have felt bad for it if it weren't for how happy he seemed. His inhibitions were dropped and the Iron Dragon looked more like himself than he had in the past month. Every once in a while, he'd take a step too boldly and tottle to the side, only to catch himself before he'd actually fall, laughing about how Laxus was taking up too much of the sidewalk.

"Oi! Sparky! Mah house is _that_ way," Gajeel snickered when Laxus took a left instead of a right.

"I know… but I _promised_ Lily I wouldn't bring you home drunk,"

"Pfft… so? He's probably asleep anyways,"

"T's only nine," Laxus snorted, "Sides, I ain't takin' any chances. Soon as you get kicked out I'm stuck wit yer sorry ass."

"Shit…" Gajeel tripped and gripped onto Laxus's arm. Laxus tried his hardest not to lose his footing but all in vain as the two men went tumbling to the ground, Laxus barely catching himself with his hand before falling into the grass and Gajeel tumbling into a heap beside him.

"Fuck… I really let you drink too much," Laxus laughed heartily, propping himself up on one arm and looking down at the Iron Dragon who was sprawled out in the grass, his disheveled hair fanning out around him, "Lily will be pissed."

"Ah, let 'im. He won't get off my ass lately, anyway," Gajeel huffed, his bleary gaze up at the clear sky above them, "Sides, he doesn't want me to come home."

"Why not?" Laxus would have been surprised at his own brazenness is his inhibitions hadn't left him a while ago. Now he seemed incapable of not saying anything that popped into his head.

"Cuz of my nightmares," Gajeel sighed, tucking his arms behind his head, "they keep us both awake, I s'pose."

"What're they about?"

"Depends. Sometimes it's Bianca. Sometimes it's Phantom. Used to just be Phantom. Recently it's been a bit of both."

"Phantom?"

"Phantom Lord. My old guild,"

"Shit, that's right. Sorry, I forget. Wasn't here for all that," Laxus sighed, also rolling to his back to cross his arms behind his head, "Mira tried to get me to come back but I was too far up mah own ass to do it."

Gajeel smirked, "Well at least you admit it."

The two were quiet for a moment, in their own thoughts. Laxus was trying to remember the last time he'd let himself drink this much. It had to have been years. He turned his gaze to Gajeel who seemed much less cheerful than just a little time before. His ruby eyes were distant and dark, as if they were remembering something from a long time ago.

"What was Phantom Lord like?"

Gajeel started at his words, turning his gaze to the blonde, "Why d'you wanna know?"

Laxus shrugged and turned to face him, stretching out on his side so he could give Gajeel his full attention, "Just curious."

"When are you ever _just curious_?" Gajeel regarded him suspiciously, narrowing his eyes.

"Well if it's gonna piss you off, don't worry about it,"

Gajeel was quiet for a moment, his stare not wavering as if he were searching for a chink in the blonde's armor or maybe an ulterior motive. Finally, he sighed and also turned to face Laxus, propping himself up on his arm and lacing his fingers into the grass. He diverted his gaze to the ground, however, as if he were thinking hard about what he was going to say.

"I mean, it was a mercenary guild. What more is there to say?" he finally sighed at length, "I got jobs to take out certain people and I did it."

"What kind of people? Just anybody?"

"Nah… usually they had it coming. It was a lot of people into gangs or drug trafficking. Sometimes they were hits for other mercenary guilds."

"Were they all people you had to kill?"

"Nah, that was just the serious shit. Usually we were just roughing someone up or sending a message. Shit like what I did to Levy, or when I was sent to kidnap Lucy. It just kind of depended on what Jose wanted done,"

"How many people have you killed?"

"Enough."

"How cryptic." Laxus smirked, but it was clear Gajeel was uncomfortable, "I ain't takin' it to the Magic Council."

"I ain't worried about the Magic Council." Gajeel muttered, looking as if he were waiting to sink into the ground.

"I ain't gonna spread it around the guild, either." Laxus added, trying to catch Gajeel's ruby eyes. He was silent for a minute before rolling back onto his back with a heavy sigh.

"Are we counting _everyone_ or just… the big people." Gajeel slurred lowly, "Probably everyone."

Laxus just waited patiently as Gajeel closed his eyes and counted, occasionally furrowing his brow as he tried to remember.

"Sixty. Solidly," he breathed, not opening his eyes, "Maybe more… I'm not really sure."

"Holy shit," Laxus's eyes widened, "you remember all of them?"

"It ain't like some fucking movie. I don't remember all of 'em. I don't know all of their names or any shit like that. Maybe if I were like some of the other guys and did it because it was fun I'd be into that shit but… they were just jobs."

"You knew guys who killed people for fun?"

"Yeah… hated 'em too. They were fucking insane."

"So why did you do it, then? Why didn't you just leave?"

"All the hard questions tonight…" Gajeel whispered, still never opening his eyes, "There wasn't a way to just leave. That's the beauty of running a place like Jose did. You start the young ones out with petty crime. Stealing, breaking and entering, maybe assault or threats, shit that young, impressionable kids get inta. Then you tell 'em that they need to take it a step further for the guild. You get 'em to kill or fuck up someone up real bad. Then it's over their head. If they did it then why not do it again? Once you've killed yer first guy, you got a choice. If you want out, there's the door. But no one's savin' yer ass from the Magic Council. You wanna stay? Then ya better be ready to do it again. And when you got nowhere to go, ya only really ever see one choice. So ya have to either start likin' what yer doin', or like it from the start.

I never got behind killin'. Not even at my worst... that didn't mean I didn't like how scared everyone was of me. It was… addictive. Worse than alcohol or cigarettes or anything else I got into. The thrill when you walked inta a room and not a guy in there could even look at ya because they knew you could smell their fear. That shit was awesome and it was all I really knew."

Laxus was wordless. He wasn't sure what he had expected but it wasn't that speech.

"You miss that?" the words slipped out without Laxus's permission but Gajeel didn't seem upset by them. His lip quivered slightly before he finally opened his eyes.

"Nah… that shit scares the piss outta me now."

"Really?"

"Yeah, I mean… I always told myself I wasn't as bad as some of the other guys because I didn't enjoy killing people… I did it because I had to but…" his breath stuttered a bit as he spoke and he clenched his fists, "I could have killed Levy or Lucy. I fucking… they were helpless… and I hate myself every time I think about it because I… I…"

Gajeel couldn't finish and honestly Laxus didn't need him to. He reached out and placed a hand on the Iron Dragon's arm, felt the way he stiffened beneath his touch and then slowly relaxed. He finally opened his eyes and they rolled slowly to gaze into Laxus's gold.

"You're not the same person you were," Laxus said softly, somehow not finding it in him to disrupt their contact.

"I don't think I've changed as much as you think I have,"

"You have," Laxus said with a sense of finality that Gajeel didn't have the determination to fight, "Come on. Let's get you home."

"I dunno… I'm still pretty drunk."

"Yeah? Well you ain't coming to my place so you better sober the hell up."

"Better than my place," Gajeel growled lowly and Laxus felt lightning rip down his spine. He felt every muscle in his body tense and he focused his gaze up at the stars. Did Gajeel _want_ to come home with him?

"You'd have to sleep on the floor," Laxus chuckled, trying to dismiss the feeling that suddenly began to pool in the pit of his stomach.

"I could sleep in yer bed,"

Another shock down Laxus's spine and the feeling in his stomach dropped lower, calling forth another dangerous emotion to his attention. He swallowed and chewed on the inside of his cheek.

"And where the hell am I supposed to sleep?"

Laxus held his breath, trying to calm his head before any adverse effects were to take hold.

"The floor."

"Well I ain't really in the mood to do that. Besides, Lily will be worried."

"Lily ain't my keeper."

"Oh, shut the hell up," Laxus grunted, rolling to his knees and ignoring the swimming in his head as he pushed himself to his feet, "You still owe me that song, by the way. Don't think I've forgotten."

"Damn and here I thought talking about my violent, bloody past would have gotten your mind off of it," Gajeel laughed, if a bit sardonically.

"I think you want my mind off of it because you don't actually write songs," Laxus challenged but instead of rising to the occasion as Gajeel normally did, he just kind of stared up at Laxus from where he was laying on the ground, making no move to get up himself.

"It's not that I don't… it's that I haven't made anything good recently."

"Whatever you say," Laxus offered Gajeel his hand and Gajeel regarded it coldly, still making no motion to take it.

"How much do you need to hear for me to convince you?"

"Anything at this rate," Laxus's smile wavered. The shadows on Gajeel's face were back, but maybe it was just the time of night that was finally getting to him. The Iron Mage sighed, pushed himself up to his feet without Laxus's help, and stumbled in the general direction of his home. At first Laxus thought the mood swing had something to do with his relentless questioning, but suddenly Gajeel was humming quietly to himself. Laxus strode to catch up with him and the sound of Gajeel's voice on the cool wind was something he honestly found chilling.

 _"My legs are dangling off the edge_

 _the ground and sky look the same to me_

 _I think I've lost my mind again_

 _And I'm gone, gone, gone._

 _My legs are dangling off the edge_

 _My mind is no longer one of my friends,_

 _If I could just let go of what keeps me here_

 _I'll be gone…"_

The silence when he'd finished left the air heavy. Laxus stuffed his hands into his pockets and stared down at the raven who was bent on keeping his eyes forward.

"Well… you got me," Laxus breathed, eyeing Gajeel closely, "I believe you."

"That was easy,"

Laxus chewed the inside of his cheek, the urge to ask him about why he'd made the song gnawing at him. But a lot of his drink had worn off and he was much more aware of how he'd been pressing Gajeel for information. If he kept pushing, he was sure that at this point he'd recede back into his shell again, especially since now the alcohol was wearing out of his system as well. Instead, Laxus decided to stay close. He walked side by side with Gajeel until they could see his house in the distance.

Maybe it was the fact that he knew the night was coming to an end on a sour note, but he suddenly felt ballsy. He actually walked Gajeel up to the porch and stood in front of the door with him, his arms limp as his sides as they both stared at the entrance. Gajeel, crossed his arms and scuffed his boot against the ground.

"Well… I'm not drunk."

"Good. Lily won't yell at either of us, then."

"Yeah."

Laxus took a breath and glanced down at the tanned man at his side, "Redfox?"

"Mm?"

"Thank you... for going with me tonight," he felt his stomach twist into a nervous knot as he spoke, "I had fun."

"Yeah? I didn't have a bad time either," Gajeel looked up at him and met his gaze.

"When you decide to start jogging again, let me know. You can show me your routine."

Gajeel smirked, "Yeah… you really need it."

Laxus reached out and placed his hand on Gajeel's hand. The Iron Slayer stiffened beneath his touch but didn't smack his hand away or yell.

"My door's open, by the way… if you need someone to talk to," Gajeel's eyes widened at his words and he stood silently as if not believing what Laxus was saying, "Anyway… goodnight."

"Uh… yeah… night…"

Laxus withdrew his hand and quietly walked off the porch. He could feel ruby eyes staring at him as he walked down the street, heading home. All the while Laxus couldn't get the nervous feeling out of his stomach. As he made it home, the tips of his fingers still tingled with the remembrance of touching black locks. He sat on the edge of his bed for a moment and just stared down at his hands, knowing very well it was going to be hard for him to sleep tonight.


	30. Chapter 30

Chapter 30:

 _"_ _He's in heat… like a fucking animal."_

 _The hot midnight around him was too much. They'd covered his eyes and tightened his restraints. He'd been screaming and thrashing until his throat was sore and his wrists and ankles were rubbed raw. The heat was burning him alive. His body was on fire. He could do little more than lay there and breathe, praying that this would be the end. Maybe his heart would finally give out and he'd die._

 _"…_ _An animal."_

 _He heard the sound of an electric lock opening and a heavy door being swung open and once again tightly shut. The shuffle of boots on cement were drawing closer. He stilled and tasted the air with every frenzied gasp. Fear, sweat, and the sour scent of something old and familiar were in the air. Another set of lungs breathing in his airspace. He felt rage bubbling up inside him, tried to calm his hyperactive breathing…_

 _"_ _Shit… they weren't kidding…" his voice was too close and every muscle on Gajeel's body was tensed, ready to attack whoever was creeping closer in the darkness. A hand grazed over his arm and he shuddered, disgusted at the tremor that worked its way through his body. Damn him. Damn this heat. Damn whoever it was that had just touched him. A deranged chuckle sounded beside him and a hand gripped his chin, yanking his face back and forcing him to dig his hands into the table to try to ease the pressure on his neck, "I always thought you were a fucking animal…"_

 _Gajeel gritted his teeth, dragged his nails against the metal beneath him and thrashed as hard as he could to get free. The whole table jolted and whoever was holding onto his chin stumbled back out of reach just in case. When his restraints held he let out a noise like a strangled whine from the back of his throat. There was nothing he could do to get away. He couldn't even_ see _who he was at the mercy of. Dread was beginning to claw its way up through the haze of drugs and burning skin._

 _"_ _They sang your praises at Phantom Lord… I wonder what Master Jose would have thought if he knew this was what you really were," the steps approached again, this time circling fingers around his neck, "I always knew those eyes of yers weren't human. You're more a fucking beast than you are a man."_

 _"_ _I'll tear you apart…" Gajeel growled, feeling the pressure starting to close his airways._

 _"_ _Animals don't speak," he felt hot breath fall against his face and one of the hands keeping him from being able to breathe suddenly retreated. He could hear fabric rustling and the sound of a zipper, "Why don't I give you something to keep you quiet?"_

 _In one last, furious attempt Gajeel lashed out at his tormenter. His arm snapped loose from its binding and he thrashed wildly, feeling his fist connect with something solid. He was free and he was pissed. The taste of iron filled his mouth and he could hear someone screaming to be let out. Gajeel was across the room in a moment, picking the man up by his throat and slamming him against the door._

 _"_ _I'm an animal?" Gajeel breathed, gripping the man's throat tighter,_ tighter _,_ **tighter** _. He was gasping, his eyes filled with terror and he fought to try to get away in vain. He could hear commotion outside the door but he didn't care. He was lost in the feeling of crushing; the sound of someone fighting for their life was sending a thrill down his spine. He was free and finally in control. And not just in control of his body, but of people around him. He was light-headed with the feeling of dominating another human being for the first time in years. It was like an old itch that needed to be scratched after being ignored for too long or the first dreg of a cigarette after years of quitting, "Maybe you're right."_

Gajeel jolted awake. He didn't move, his eye were just wide and staring up at the ceiling. His breathing was labored and he suddenly felt sick to his stomach. He refused to move and just listened to the crazed beating in his chest, wondering if his heart was finally going to hammer itself to death. After a few moments, he was calm enough to sit up in bed.

He was sober for the first morning in weeks. He clenched his teeth against the memories that were still buzzing around in his head. He needed to fix that. He desperately needed to fix that. He pushed himself off the bed and picked up a bottle that was sitting on his dresser. Empty. He moved about his room, testing the weight of what was left in the dank space and coming up short. He sighed and slowly swung open the door. His eyes cut through the dark from blackout curtains and closed doors. He moved quietly, casting ruby eyes around to pick out whether or not a certain black cat was already up and about.

"Gajeel? You awake?" Pantherlily's voice cut through the gloomy house and Gajeel let out a tense sigh, not ready to deal with his partner so early in the morning.

"Yeah," he called back, trudging into the living room only to find the Exceed not there. He glanced into the kitchen where Pantherlily was flitting about, putting together some breakfast. Gajeel cocked an eyebrow at him and crossed his arms in the entryway, "You're up early."

"And you're not drunk," his friend replied matter-of-factly, "We're both full of surprises this morning."

Gajeel watched in silence as Lily whipped together some eggs and made two plates, setting them down at the small two-person table that was in their kitchen. Gajeel regarded him suspiciously at first but was quickly reminded that he'd gone several mornings without breakfast and his body desperately needed the protein even after last night's dinner. He sat across from Lily and the two ate in silence, barely looking at each other as if they were strangers in the confined space.

This had become their norm ever since Gajeel had returned. The air was always thick with tension and it just reminded him of how badly he wanted to escape. He was tied down again, this time with a totally different type of restraint.

"So…" Lily piped up, obviously trying to start up a conversation, but it was already annoying to the Iron Dragon and he wasn't in the mood to talk, "How was this Willie guy?"

"He was alright,"

"Isn't he one of your favorite artists?"

"Yeah."

"How long was the show? Do you remember?"

"Dunno… like two hours maybe,"

"Two hours? You were out pretty late. Did you two go do something else after the show?"

"Gee… I dunno Mom, did we?" Gajeel spat and Lily sighed heavily.

"I'm just trying to talk to you, Gajeel. It's something friends do. They _talk_." Lily growled, standing up and placing his plate into the sink and muttering as he walked, "And here I thought you'd be in a better mood after your date."

Gajeel choked.

" _What_ did you just say?" he snarled, his eyes cutting into the Exceed like knives. Lily froze, confusion clear on his face.

"What…?" he was analyzing his own words, clearly puzzled over how he could have suddenly caused so much fury in his partner.

"Did you just fucking call it a _date_?" he seethed.

"I thought…" his eyes darted to the side, "Aren't you two… haven't you… been involved?"

"You're not serious," Gajeel's eyes widened and Pantherlily actually felt threatened. He backed up a pace and held out his hands, feeling like he was trying to stop a train as it hurdled towards him, "With… with _Laxus_? What do you think I am?!"

"I thought you liked him! Calm down, Gajeel, it's not a big deal!" Lily retreated another step when he noticed angry iron scales fighting to show themselves on his skin, "It's alright if you like Laxus, I don't see you any differently."

"I don't _like_ Laxus. I can _barely stand_ Laxus. The _only_ reason I went with him was because you've been on my ass for the last week about getting out of the _damn house_!" Gajeel's eyes flashed dangerously and suddenly the Slayer in him was out, glittering scales covering his usual tanned skin and his canines glistening threateningly, "Haven't I been through enough lately without you trying to hook me up with someone?!"

Lily transformed into his full size and widened his stance, obviously a defensive maneuver, "Gajeel Redfox, if you take another step towards me like that I swear…"

Gajeel felt like he'd been snapped in half. His mind was just a tumultuous hurricane of thoughts and emotions that he wasn't ready to deal with. Didn't he have enough just trying to recover from what he'd been through? And now his friend was staring at him with the same kind of terror he'd seen just a few weeks earlier? Something he'd never thought he'd see in the eyes of someone he was so close to. Lily was afraid of him? Seriously? It was _his_ fault he was this pissed off in the first place! What right did he have to be afraid? To stand in his kitchen and demand Gajeel calm down as if he were some child throwing a temper tantrum? He was raging, his blood boiling and his vision quickly becoming blurry.

He lashed out and punched the wall, feeling the drywall crumple like paper beneath his fist. He was shaking he was so angry. Pantherlily flinched away from him, pulling his arms up as if to block the attack. Gajeel dragged his talons against the wall, staring down Lily as he stood stock still, not daring to break his eyes from the raging man in front of him.

"Are you fucking scared of me?" he growled lowly.

"I'm not scared of you-"

"THEN WHY ARE YOU LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT?!"

"Because you're threatening me, Gajeel! Look at you! Look at your scales!" Lily backed up another pace as Gajeel turned on him, eyes fiery and fists clenched, "Don't come at me like that if you don't want me to act defensive!"

"Are you gonna fucking turn on me like the Magic Council did, too?" he growled, advancing another step.

"You know I'm on your side, Gajeel, now STAND DOWN!" the general in him was coming out, he took on a more authoritative stance.

A knock sounded at the door and suddenly it felt like all the air was sucked out of the room. Pantherlily waited a beat and chanced a look at the door just as the knob jiggled. Gajeel took a breath, an attempt to steady himself that immediately went awry. The door opened slowly, hesitantly and the figure in the doorway only exacerbated Gajeel's anger. Laxus stood there, his eyes quickly sweeping across the room from Lily to Gajeel. His golden eyes were tight as they rested on the Iron Dragon who made no move to even pretend to calm down.

"I heard yelling," Laxus's eyes were set firmly on Gajeel, "Is everything alright?"

"Ah… apologies… we just got into an argument," Lily was always so formal. He was the type to hide problems, to sweep them under the rug and pretend they either didn't exist or weren't as bad as they seemed. Gajeel resented the Exceed for it, "Were you heading to the guild?"

"I was… I wanted to see if you felt up to going," Laxus never moved his gaze from Gajeel and it felt like he might as well have been digging his nails into his flesh. Why was he here? He was suddenly like a plague in his life, popping up in dark places where he didn't belong. He never cared before, never gave a damn about him or the guild or anything other than himself for that matter. So why was it that now there was carefully concealed concern in those electric eyes of his?

Gajeel gritted his teeth, "You wanted to see…"

"I've been pushing him to get out lately but I think maybe today isn't a good day," Lily piped up, his voice holding a lighter lilt to it despite the way his eyes still darted over to the Iron Dragon to ensure he wasn't gearing up to fight.

"Laxus…" Gajeel tried his best to cool his temper but it was so hard. He barely had control of himself, "What was yesterday?"

Laxus's eyes widened and Gajeel could feel the heat creeping through his chest, bubbling like lava through his veins with every beat of his heart.

"Yesterday?" Laxus fumbled through the word dumbly, "What do you mean?"

"Was it a date?" he felt pressure on his chest, as if there were some sort of demon huddled on his sternum trying to slowly suffocate him.

"Not… not if you didn't want it to be,"

Gajeel felt like the world was spinning around him. The red was spreading, tearing from his veins to his peripheral vision as he tried to focus, tried to tell himself he needed to regain control over himself.

"Are you fucking insane?" was all he could manage to force out of his mouth.

"Why would I be insane?" Laxus suddenly tensed, his hands balling up tightly at his sides, "What's wrong if that's what I wanted?"

"What you wanted?" Gajeel growled, stepping towards Laxus as the haze fought to completely rule him, "What about what _I_ wanted?"

Laxus didn't move an inch and Gajeel was having a hard time concentrating. He wasn't thinking, just acting on the raw emotions that were raging inside of him like a hurricane.

"Haven't a been through enough without you coming at me like some fucking bitch in heat?" he felt like his entire body was throbbing, his blood was singing in his ears. He felt like he was submerged in a murky, red ocean. The sounds around him were muddled and he was losing his grip on reality.

"I didn't do anything like that," Laxus breathed although there was a guilt in his eyes that only fueled Gajeel's inner wildfire.

"Reserved it for the second date, hm? Gentleman," was he even making sense anymore? Gajeel couldn't tell. He was just pissed. He felt manipulated and lied to. Why didn't he have control of his own body anymore? Was it because he was weak? He wasn't an easy target to be picked off.

"Redfox…"

"STOP CALLING ME THAT!" Gajeel roared, finally losing it. He needed control. He needed to know the world wasn't swirling around him in madness like he felt it was. Where was the normalcy? Ever since Bianca his whole damn life had be turned upside down. He was in a rocket out of control, spiraling towards the atmosphere where all he desperately wanted was to right his course and go back out into space. He wanted his old life back. He wanted to get along with his guildmates again. He wanted the nightmares gone, the blood off his hands. He wanted those reptilian eyes to stop staring at him at night and the scares faded from his skin. The remembrance of sick, unwanted touches pervaded his skin whenever he wasn't drunk or unconscious. He wanted it all gone.

Before he was kidnapped.

Before he was helpless.

Before Bianca.

Before Laxus.

Laxus was in front of him. When had he even moved? It took Gajeel so off guard that he lashed out at the blonde, punching him so hard in the jaw that his head whipped around viciously and he stumbled to the side.

"DON'T TOUCH ME."

"Gajeel! Calm down!" Lily advanced but stayed when Laxus held up a hand.

"DON'T TELL ME TO CALM DOWN!" he snarled, turning crimson eyes back to Laxus whose lip was now bloodied, "I'm going to say this once, Laxus Dreyar. Get out of my house and don't fucking talk to me again."

"Gaj-" Lily began to protest but Gajeel silenced him with just a look.

"I can't fucking stand you and I want nothing to do with you," Gajeel had devolved into mad trembling as he spoke. He wanted to do more than just yell, more than just hit him. He wanted to scream and punch and kick and destroy.

"I know that's a lie," Laxus growled, not backing down. In fact, he surged forward once again this time with a fire of his own, "You're the one to asked me to follow you. If you didn't want anything to do with me, then why?"

"I was out of my mind, obviously." Gajeel seethed, standing chest to chest with the Lightning Mage, "But if you're going to hold me to what I said, fine. Then I guess that means what you did to me in that cave was no fucking accident?"

He'd gone too far and Laxus crumpled. He retreated, hurt and guilt and self-loathing all spelled out across his face. Gajeel didn't budge. He was too full of relentless anger and animosity to care that the blonde was so clearly burning himself alive with Gajeel's words.

"I'm sorry," Laxus steeled himself, shutting up the emotions that were roiling just beneath the surface and putting on the same stoic face Gajeel was used to, "I'll leave."

He slipped out the door without another word and suddenly Gajeel felt like he could breathe again. The world was spinning a little less, the red had ebbed slightly. But where his anger at Laxus was finally starting to subside, Lily swooped in to take his place.

"Did that make you feel more like a man?" his voice was like a knife being hurled at Gajeel's chest.

"The fuck did you just say?"

"He tried to reach out to you, Gajeel! What's wrong with trying to be there for you? To help you?"

"Help me? The only person he cares about is himself!"

"You've turned into a cruel and mal tempered man, Gajeel," Lily clenched his fists, something akin to sadness in his eyes as he spoke, "It's a wonder anyone has anything to do with you."

"Well if I'm so hard to deal with, why don't you get out."

Lily froze, his brows pushing together as remorse and worry finally took over the anger he'd expended, "You don't mean that."

"If I didn't mean it, I wouldn't say it," Gajeel bit back. There was a tense silence before Lily powered down. He quietly padded up to the door and refused to look at his partner as he left.

For on glorious moment Gajeel just existed in silence and solitude. It was the first peace he'd had since he'd come back that wasn't alcohol or exhaustion induced. Just as it had fallen over him, though, it quickly slipped away. He sank to the floor, staring down at hands covered in iron.

He'd driven them both away. In his anger and hurt he'd driven them both away. It was amazing how a few harsh words could break people down. It was almost too easy. But why? Why had he wanted to drive them away so badly? Lily was his best friend. He'd been on his ass but he was trying to help, even if he didn't understand how.

And Laxus…

Gajeel rubbed his knuckles into his forehead as if he could push away the emotions that were suddenly roaring back up again.

Laxus… what even was Laxus doing? What was he trying to pull? Neither of them were gay. Neither of them wanted this for each other. Almost every encounter between the two of them ended in fighting or… he felt his body shudder. He couldn't think about it. He hadn't been able to think about anything intimate since he'd been kidnapped. It just ripped him back to that cell. He was in the dark again, held down, burning alive, being touched when he desperately just wanted it all to end… and when he remembered he just wanted to forget it all over again. He wanted to sleep. But sleep brought nightmares of the monster he was, the crimes he'd committed. He couldn't deal with how he felt when he'd finally gotten his vengeance. It was a thrill that he'd never felt before.

He'd done so well. When he'd first come to Fairy Tail he'd worried that the transition would be difficult, that he'd be expelled for fucking something up. Actually, he'd found it much easier in the calm environment. There wasn't the same mad need to be on top. They were competitive, sure, but their lives didn't depend on it. He'd been driven to fight in Phantom Lord. He'd been angry all the time, like a nuclear warhead he was just waiting to be set off.

He'd turned on his comrades then, too.

He pushed his knuckles so hard into his temples that he was starting to see red again.

He was no better than when he was with Phantom Lord. No, he was worse. He hadn't had any friends when he was under Jose. Juvia was the only one who'd stood beside him and he was loyal to her so much so that he'd even followed her to Fairy Tail when she'd asked. He'd hurt her and he could never make up for it. And now he'd hurt Lily and Laxus. That was all he was good for. All he could do was destroy and break and kill. He had tried to be good. He'd done so well for so long. He'd started a new life, cut all ties with the people he knew in his old guild, and lived an upright life.

And suddenly he'd thrown himself headfirst back into his old self. When he'd lost it in Bianca's underground, it was worse than anything he'd ever done in Phantom. He'd not just killed, but he'd relished doing it. Even remembering it, the thrill that had shivered up his spine and jettisoned him forward with each pain he inflicted, made him feel sick to his stomach. He'd turned into something he hated, something he swore he'd never become even on his worst days under Jose. He'd enjoyed killing. He sought live out just to snuff them out.

He wanted to vomit. He hated himself. He was fucked up, ruined, worthless. His life was just a toxic mess around him. He was drowning in his own thoughts and fears and self-loathing.

He was so tired.

He didn't want to fight anymore. He was tired of fighting to get up in the morning, of fighting to drown the memories, of fighting the rage that boiled constantly inside. He just desperately wanted it to end. He'd been in such a dark place he'd been trying to hurt himself just to take his mind off of his swirling thoughts. He'd started smoking again, choked through the burning in his lungs and put the embers out on his arms. What else was he supposed to do? Lily had taken the razors away.

A sudden calm drifted over the Iron Dragon.

Why was he even fighting? What was the point anymore? He was finally alone. He didn't have anyone to fight for anymore. He was done.

He lifted himself up, his mind no longer the haze it had been. Actually, it was startlingly clear. He dressed himself, not bothering to tuck his pants into his boots before he walked out the door. He went to a liquor store not far from his house. The cashier recognized him as he approached and reluctantly sold him a bottle of sake and a pack of cigarettes. He turned towards the tall hills, making his way through the forest with quiet ease.

It really was a beautiful day. The sun was filtering through the leaves and leaving speckles of yellow, orange, and deep scarlet on the forest floor as he walked. It was warm, the chill of fall hadn't driven away the summer heat just yet. Fallen leaves crunched beneath his steps as he climbed the hill that he knew well. He walked up to a large oak and shed his boots and socks, planting his feet on the ground and just smelling the earthy air around him. He carried himself and his vices to the edge of the cliff. He took each step with abandon even though the earth was dangerously unstable here. He sat on the edge and let his legs dangle off the edge.

He opened the bottle, his stomach buzzing so much he wasn't sure he'd be able to keep it down. He took a long drink and set it down roughly, listening to the sounds of rocks falling. He lit a cigarette, took a deep dreg and held in the burning smoke for a moment before sighing. He always thought tobacco smoke looked so much more sickly than that of regular wood. It seeped into the air like poison entering the atmosphere, spindly and sticky as it filled the world with more toxins. Just like him; adding more hate and fear and anger to the world.

He stared out to the world covered in autumn. The forest was beautiful this time of year. It was like the world was celebrating the end of its own life as winter knocked on the door.

He took another draught from his bottle.

What a wonderful day to die.

But first, he needed to finish his cigarette.


	31. Chapter 31

Chapter 31:

Laxus stormed through the street. The aching in his chest was threatening to swallow him whole and he was clenching his jaw so hard there was a sharp pain lancing down his neck. A sore lump had formed in his throat and made its home there, throbbing every time he swallowed and bullying his voice into submission so that he dared not speak for fear his voice would crack.

Honestly, what had he expected? He'd put Gajeel through hell. Just those few words had brought all of his crippling shame back to the surface. He'd finally started to accept that maybe Gajeel didn't resent him for what happened between them and that it could mean he should let it go too, but he'd made it perfectly clear that this wasn't the case. He'd gotten his hopes up. Why had he gotten his hopes up? Why had he thought for even two seconds that this would have been anything other than a giant rejection? He was such an idiot. Why did he even try? If someone had done to him everything that he'd done to Gajeel, he'd probably hate them. He'd probably want them locked up.

"Such a fucking kid," he snuffed at himself, stopping to close his eyes against tears that were threatening to tumble from his eyes. He steadied himself, took a breath to try and calm himself down, and swallowed past the lump in his throat. He wasn't going to start blubbering. He didn't have the right. If he were completely honest with himself, he didn't have a right to even consider a relationship with Gajeel in the first place. He stuffed his hands into his pockets and started walking again, this time headed for an actual destination.

He stopped at the apartment that he'd been to over a dozen times before. He trooped up the steps and knocked timidly at the door. He heard footsteps and then the turning of the knob. Mira sashayed into view, her blue eyes sparkling cheerfully as they rested on Laxus. Mira was always happy to see him. No matter what he did, no matter how cruel he was to her, no matter what he had done, she was always there waiting. Her smile quickly vanished when she saw the hurt in his eyes and her brows furrowed as understanding made her features fall.

"Laxus… are you ok?" she said quietly and he merely shook his head, not willing to trust his voice. She stepped to the side and he came in, his heart pounding against the flurry of emotions in his chest. When he pulled the door shut behind him she rested her hand on his, her slim fingers lingering against his skin as she got closer to him, "How can I help?"

He clicked his teeth and closed his eyes against the guilt, "What's wrong with me?"

"There's nothing wrong with you, Laxus," she'd barely uttered the words and he was leaning down to kiss her. He gripped onto her roughly, pulled her against him as he sought her lips. She tipped her head back to accommodate him and her hand clung onto his shirt. He gripped her thighs and lifted her off of the ground, pushing her against the wall as she wrapped toned legs around his waist. She was lithe in his arms, digging her nails into the back of his neck as she returned feather-light kisses on his jaw.

"You're perfect Mirajane," his voice shuttered as he fought to keep his tears back and his sadness shoved down into his chest. He was trying to turn it to frustration, wishing for himself to change and his heart to switch from Gajeel to Mira, "You're beautiful, smart, strong… Mavis's sakes, I could list forever how perfect you are…"

"Laxus…" she breathed, arching against him, her blue eyes shimmering with lust and hurt and quiet understanding… always understanding…

"This is what everyone wants, isn't it? It's what you want…"

"Laxus…" he released her and felt her legs slide down on either side of his own as she slowly lowered herself to the ground. She was wearing a thin sundress and he already knew just how much she wanted him. She was still holding onto his shirt, staring up at him with shimmering, angel blue eyes. Her lips were already full and bruised and ready for him. His heart was still aching, still wishing it wasn't those angel blue eyes staring up at him but a completely different color. He didn't want to do this to her but he couldn't stand to be alone right now.

"I've known you forever, Mira… so why…?"

She shushed him, silent tears making her eyes turn red as she gazed up at him, "Your heart just wants what it wants, Laxus."

He clenched his fists and pressed his forehead against the wall, feeling every inch of her even though she was no longer touching him. He could feel her heat, hear her breath, smell her hunger.

"I'm sorry, Mira," he breathed, trying to regain control of the hot tears that wanted to break free once again, "I just fuck everything up."

"That's not true," he felt her press her body against him, a silent temptation begging him to leave his troubles at her feet if only for a moment, "You've done nothing wrong."

"I really have, Mira… and if I don't leave you now I will again," he looked down at her and for a moment where was just a hint of remorse in her eyes. Mira, who was never selfish and always put others first, quickly squashed it before it could take root. She hooked her fingers into the loops of his pants and pulled his hips closer to her own.

"If it will keep you from blaming yourself tomorrow, you can say I made you," she whispered and leaned up to steal his lips again. He let it happen, let her use him as he used her. They'd both been denied what they had wanted so why the hell not take solace in each other for a few hours?

She was undoing the buttons on his shirt, pushing him off of her and towards her bedroom. For a moment, he realized how strangely dark it was for this time of afternoon. Her windows were closed and her blinds drawn. Maybe she had also been wallowing in her own self-pity while she was alone.

"Laxus…" she breathed, straddling his lap and kissing his neck gently. He didn't open his mouth, didn't sigh out her name in return. It probably stung her and he'd never admit it out loud, but he was worried he's utter the wrong name if he was given the chance. She was grinding against him and every movement she made felt wrong and frustrated. He was pushing down the disgust he had for himself, stomping down everything in his body that was telling him this wasn't what he wanted. For today, this would do just fine. And he could tell by the way Mira's nails were digging into his back and the angry way she was nipping at his neck that she felt the same way.

He lost himself in the sounds of her taking what she wanted. The heat of her mouth sent chills down his spine. She was just as immaculate as every other time they'd done this, her graceful movements made him relax and soon she was over him and the last of his inhibitions slipped away. He closed his eyes and just let it all happen, riding with her on this dangerous sea they were afloat in. When her breathing became more erratic, he amped up the pace and soon the shivers of pleasure were making his mind go blank and a strangled sigh escape his lips.

She laid next to him but they didn't hold each other. She rolled onto her side facing away from him and pressed her face into her pillow. He didn't bother her. His own regrets were already taking a hold of his chest. He let her pretend to be asleep and he just stared at her ceiling, thankful that at least he wasn't alone.

What was he doing? Why was he here? He'd been so upset he wasn't thinking and had come here looking for a shoulder to cry on or an ear to listen or _something_ that wasn't what had just happened. Everything about Mira was suddenly so sour. He shouldn't have done this to her. What would happen if she resented him for it later? Then he would have lost her not only as a lover but also as a friend. His heart constricted at the thought. First Gajeel, now Mira… He wanted to open his mouth, to say something that might ease the obvious tension between her shoulders. But as always he was unable to articulate what it was he wanted to say.

It was completely dark when they were finally disturbed.

A knock at Mira's front door stirred Laxus from a restless doze. He lifted himself up onto his elbows and looked over at Mira's drowsy form. The next knock was more insistent and he gingerly laid a hand on her shoulder to nudge her awake. She waved at him dismissively, as if to say to just let it be and they'd go away. Laxus couldn't shake the feeling that this was something important, so he groggily rose and gathered his clothes from her floor. At his movement, Mira finally stirred and also began to get dressed.

He trudged over to the door, ignoring the nagging in the back of his head about rumors that would start depending on who was on the other side of her doorway. Just as the third round of knocking filled the entryway, Laxus finally opened the door and his stomach dropped a little at who was in front of him. Pantherlily's eyes widened at the Thunder Dragon and of course they were just as sharp as his claws.

"Laxus… fancy seeing you here," Lily coughed, a disapproving look in his eyes, "You rebound fast."

"It isn't like that," he muttered but Lily wasn't buying it.

"I didn't take you for the type to stoop this low," Lily growled, crossing his arms and Laxus felt the heat of shame spreading through his chest.

"I didn't take Mira for the type either,"

Lily backed down then, his respect for Mirajane high enough to keep him from making any other offhanded comments.

"Lily? Is that you?" Mira's tired voice called from deeper in the house, "What's going on? Isn't it late?"

"Yes. It is," he said matter-of-factly, "I was stopping by to see if you'd heard anything from Gajeel but I can see that's clearly not the case."

A pang of hurt stabbed at him at just Gajeel's name but he brushed it to the side. Mira came up beside him, having dressed in some leggings and an oversized shirt. She was tying her hair up.

"Have you asked Juvia?" she said calmly, not too concerned that the Iron Dragon was missing.

"Yes," Lily huffed.

"Levy?" she put her hands on her hips, her blue eyes flicking to the side as she thought.

"Yes."

"Natsu?"

"Yes," he sighed, balling tiny paws as he spoke, "And Wendy. I've been to the guild, his favorite bars, a few liquor stores, home and back again a dozen times…"

Mira frowned as she looked down at him, "Maybe he's just out walking around? Cooling his head?"

"It's been hours…" Lily's eyes fell to the ground. It was apparent he was worried. Laxus cast his eyes to the setting sun. The sky was past the point of bright magentas and fire reds. All that was left of the sun's dying rays where the deep maroons and purples on the horizon. It would be completely dark within the hour. A chill was settling in the air that made his skin prickle with gooseflesh.

"What about the forest?" Laxus mused and the two looked at him. He crossed his arms, not meeting Lily or Mira's eyes, "…it calms him down. He thinks it's peaceful."

"I… but where...?" Lily turned towards the hills.

"Maybe you should go home and rest, Lily? I'm sure he'll be back by the morning," Mira smiled gently at him, leaning down so that her silver strands were tumbling down her shoulder.

"I don't think I can," he finally admitted quietly.

Laxus's brows pulled together and the defeated Pantherlily finally broke down.

"What's going on?" Mira asked, tucking her hair behind her ear as she knelt down to be at his level. Laxus just eyed him silently, quickly realizing the situation was more severe than they'd thought.

"After… everything… he kicked me out. I thought maybe that would be best, to give him some space. But after a couple hours I wanted to check on him to make sure he was alright but he wasn't home…"

"Maybe he's just out like Laxus said…"

"You don't understand," Lily shook his head, "I think he's going to hurt himself… or worse."

"Don't joke around about that kind of thing," Laxus growled and Lily flinched, his eyes large.

"I wouldn't joke about my best friend trying to kill himself, Laxus!" Lily yelled back, worry clear in his voice.

Laxus's heart dropped for a moment and he felt Mira's arm circle around his own. She was speaking rapidly but he wasn't quite hearing what she was saying. He was too busy trying to think. Had he really been this bad? How could he have not noticed? He gritted his teeth. No wonder he felt like he'd been taken advantage of. With a sudden determination he stepped off of the porch, ripping away from Mira's touch and forging into the dying light. He heard her call after him and the sound of Pantherlily's aeria magic but he didn't look back at them. He was thinking of anywhere the Iron Dragon could have gone.

The forest… what about the clearing? He rushed through the streets, his eyes scanning constantly for long raven locks and ruby eyes. He made his way to the forest, to the path that was familiar, and deep into the brush. He called out Gajeel's name and listened as his voice bounced back at him from the trees and the ground. His steps were getting more frantic as he walked in silence, his mind gearing itself up for what he might find.

He stepped into the clearing and felt his chest tighten.

"Gajeel!" he called, listening to the wind sigh through the trees and across the tall grass where they had once sparred. There was nothing, no sign of him here.

He swallowed and turned immediately, heading back through the woods while keeping his eyes and ears peeled. His steps were faster, the beating of his heart louder. He was back on the street again, heading through town and peering into shop windows and the eyes of strangers. He saw a shock of midnight. His spirits raced and just as suddenly deflated again when he realized it wasn't Gajeel. He pushed forward, breaking into a jog as he continued.

Where was he? Where could he have gone?

He went to the park where the sakura trees would bloom in the spring. He passed the massive tree that he'd once fought him under. He darted down paths, passed couples on their ways home, his hands shaking with each face he didn't recognize. He was running now, his heart pounding deafeningly in his ears. What if Gajeel was already gone? How would he know? Would they find his body? How long before they get the rest of the guild involved? At this point, were they looking for their friend or their friend's body? How long was it before it was too late? Did he even have any time left?

He was zipping in a bolt of lightning, tearing down the streets as he scoured for any sign, any hint to where Gajeel could have gone. Hell, he even flew by his own house to see. He was flashing through the streets, hating himself for running to Mira when he was down. What had he done? He'd left Gajeel when he was in such a low place. Could he even claim to care for him anymore? If something happened to him he'd never forgive himself. He had to find him, there wasn't a choice.

If he didn't… hell, he might just follow him.

He stopped in front of Gajeel's house, out of breath and weary to the point of collapse. He pushed forward, his mind mad with feverish worry as he pushed open the door. A strangled cry stuck in his chest as he once again found no sign of the raven. He stepped into the quiet house, let the darkness and cold consume him as he sank down to his knees in the middle of the floor.

"C'mon, Laxus…" he gasped, his lungs gulping down air as they fought to keep pumping oxygen into his body. He squeezed his eyes shut and pushed his fists into the ground, "You can't stop… not yet..."

The room smelled like cigarette smoke and beer. It drowned out everything around him. He couldn't even smell Gajeel anymore, it was as if he were already gone. No, _no_ , he couldn't think like that. Gajeel couldn't be gone yet, there was no way. Laxus punched the ground and pushed himself up, an ache lancing through his heart that was far worse than what he'd felt earlier today.

He couldn't be too late… he just couldn't…

He rubbed his knuckle against his forehead as he tried to think. Wasn't there anything else he could try aside from this stupid guessing game? Suddenly, he caught a whiff of Gajeel and his eyes shot open. He gazed about the room, searching for the Iron Dragon but finding no one. It must have been the wind, or just his frantic mind making it up to ease his pain…

Wait…

He sniffed the air, kicking himself for letting his emotions allow him to forget something so simple, so important. _His Dragon senses_. He took a deep breath and headed back outside. The air was so clean and devoid of any definitive features but he just barely caught a trace of Gajeel, faint from time and exposure. He didn't think, just threw himself into what his instincts were telling him to follow. He sped off, rushing towards the hills. He was running at a full sprint, ignoring the screaming in his lungs and legs as he pushed himself harder than he ever had before.

"You better… be ok…" he gasped, his mad dash taking him up a hill and tromping through leaves and twigs and bushes and anything else that got in his way. Something dark caught his eye and he came to a sudden stop, catching himself on a tree as he tore towards it. Gajeel's boots were sitting by a tree, abandoned. Laxus felt his stomach drop and he whipped his head around, searching frantically, "Gajeel! Gajeel where are you?!"

No response.

"Dammit…" he breathed, catching the scent of his friend on the wind again, stronger this time, "Gajeel… Gajeel!"

He saw a silhouette sitting on the ground and his heart soared. He raced over but quickly slowed, feeling the ground ebb beneath his feet as he approached. Gajeel didn't turn towards him, didn't say a word. He just sat at the edge of the cliff looking out over the forest. There was a bottle at his side, knocked over and dry, and an empty package of cigarettes.

"Gajeel… what are you doing out here?" Laxus took another step but froze as the sound of rocks tumbling made him realize just how unsteady the ground was here.

"Careful…" Gajeel's voice was distant and he didn't look back at Laxus as he spoke, just brought his last cigarette to his face and pulled out his lighter, clicking it a few times with shaking hands as he tried to light it, "Or you'll send us both down."

"I get it," Laxus deplored, his voice shaking as he stood out of reach of the Iron Dragon, dread making his stomach turn to lead as he stood, "What I did wasn't right... I should have told you it was a date. I'm sorry. You weren't ready for something like that. I was a selfish prick, ok? But, Mavis's sakes, take it out on me not yourself."

A dark laugh filled the air and chilled Laxus's skin, "You're pretty full of yourself thinking this is all because of your stupid stunt," Gajeel took a deep draw from his cigarette and the smoke oozed from his mouth and nose as he spoke, "I've wanted to do this for so long..."

Laxus clenched his teeth. The lump in his throat was back, fighting to keep his voice in silence but he wouldn't allow it. He didn't care if his voice cracked, didn't care if it made tears come, he couldn't stay silent, not now. Not when it meant Gajeel's life.

"T-tell me," he was shaking. He didn't know what to do or what to say to get Gajeel back from the ledge and onto stable ground. He didn't think he could handle watching him die, "How long?"

"You had to come out here," he sounded tired, defeated, and it was strange to hear Gajeel speak like that, "Right when I'd made up my mind."

"I should have come sooner," Laxus tried to sound calm but it was so difficult to be level headed. He could see the drop from here and it made him panicky. Gajeel was _right there_ , just out of reach.

"Just go home, Laxus," he brought the cigarette to his lips again. There was a lie in his voice and the tremble in his hands was just barely subdued, "I'll leave when I'm done with this."

"The only way I'm leaving is if you're coming with me," Laxus took an unsteady step forward. Dammit, he'd always hated heights, "What you're going through, Gajeel, it's not going to last forever. Shit's rough right now but in time…"

"It's been _years_ , Laxus!" Gajeel snapped, still refusing to look back at him, "I thought it was over when I came here but it isn't!"

"What… isn't over…?" he swallowed as he took another step onto the unsteady ground, clenching his fists as he tried to push down his fear. He could do this. For Gajeel he could do this.

"Everything…" Gajeel's voice started to shake, in anger or remorse Laxus couldn't tell, "my past just won't leave me alone. I can't handle what I've done anymore…"

"What you did with Phantom Lord… it was wasn't because you wanted to. You told me the other night, it was because you felt like you had to in order to stay in favor with Jose," he took another step and felt like the ground would give weigh underneath him, but he was one step closer to Gajeel. He could do this, he just needed to talk him down, "It wasn't your fault."

"I still did it Laxus!" Gajeel growled, his hands shaking again, "And just when I thought I was putting it behind me, it comes back again. Bianca… and the Magic Council…"

"The Magic Council? What the hell does the Magic Council have to do with this?" Laxus could make out the wounds on his arms. Was that why he'd been pulling at his sleeves the night prior? The slashes were almost completely healed now and in their place were small circles of blistered flesh. Laxus's eyes widened as he realized what could have caused them.

"They made me out like a monster," his voice was shuttering, "Like _I_ was the one in the wrong. The only reason why they didn't lock me up after Phantom Lord was because of a loophole, that if I was in a different guild I'd be _rehabilitated_ ," he spat the word out of his mouth as if were a disgusting morsel, "When they were going over the scene of the crime, this guy kept asking me questions. Why did I attack the guards? Why did I kill Bianca? Caetus? All those fuckers…"

"What…?" Laxus felt like his veins had just turned to ice.

"They didn't have reason to believe I was in any life-threatening danger. What if I just did it… because I wanted to?"

"No… no that can't be what they meant…" Laxus shook his head slowly in horror. They wouldn't… would they?

"This fucker… I didn't even get his name… he asked me about shit from Phantom, asked about old jobs, people I knew, told me about how he'd locked up most of the guys I used to run with… He wants Kurogane locked up because I'm a menace to everyone around me. I can't be changed…"

"You _have_ changed, Gajeel," Laxus reached out. His fingers grazed Gajeel's shoulder as he came every slowly closer, "You're not the person you used to be."

"What if I'm not? What if I'm worse?" his voice was barely a whisper and Laxus kneeled down next to him, trying to stop the fearful tremors running through his body.

"You're not," he said sternly, trying to find Gajeel's eyes.

"You have no idea…"

"Then tell me," Laxus sat down and tried to calm himself. He rolled the bottle off the side of the cliff and listened as it smashed into bits on the way down, "I'll never know if you don't tell me."

"I'm fucked up, ok?" Gajeel snapped, finally looking over at the Lightning Mage. His eyes were bloodshot and sunken in. He looked like he hadn't slept in weeks and Laxus realized his hands were shaking again, "That feeling of… of tearing through someone else… I loved it. Just thinking about it makes me sick. I've never felt like that before. They took everything away from me, my freedom, my sanity, even my fucking body. I was… they…"

Tears started to streak down his face and he immediately looked down, rubbing the back of his hands against his eyes to try and dry the tears before they could fall, "I'm fucked up."

"No you're not." Laxus didn't know what to do. Should he reach out a hand to comfort him? Should he stoically listen? What was he supposed to say?

"I wanted them dead… I wanted to kill them… finally being the one to end it all was the most amazing thing. And that bitch… I could have… I wanted to…" Gajeel's eyes got distant again. His mind was running with what he couldn't bring himself to say aloud, "What happens when it's not people I hate?"

"What do you mean?" Laxus breathed, unable to take in everything Gajeel was saying. He had no idea how to help and the floundering killed him. What if he was just making everything worse? Would he have the ability to stop him?

"I'm starting to hurt the people I care about," Gajeel took a pull from his vice and tried to steady himself but his voice still held a touch of horror, "I fucking hit you… I wanted to hurt Lily… what happens when I can't control myself? If I get that angry again? What if… what if I can't stop myself…"

"You won't."

"How do you know?!" he turned on Laxus again, this time not caring about the tears tumbling from his eyes.

"Because that's not who you are."

"How do you know who I am?!" Gajeel yelled, glaring at the blonde. The resounding silence was tense and angry and terrified and awful. Gajeel whipped his head back around to stare at the ground and Laxus came to the distressing understanding that he was losing. Gajeel squeezed his eyes shut and he could see the vein in his neck jumping as he gritted his teeth. For a couple heartbeats Laxus cast his mind to think of something, anything to say… to do…

"You're right. I don't know," Laxus breathed, "Actually… there's a hell of a lot I don't know. I didn't know about the Magic Council, your past with Phantom Lord… Hell, I didn't even know that everything you'd been through was tearing you down so much…"

"You weren't supposed to. No one was," Gajeel's voice was shaking again but quiet.

"Why not? I know you don't see me as a friend, Gajeel, but Lily… Juvia… Levy… hell, even Natsu… especially Natsu… do you think any of us would just be ok with you doing this?"

Gajeel was silent for a moment. He'd thought about this, Laxus could see it in the way he hunched his shoulders, "Death is just a part of life, Laxus. It was bound to happen sooner or later. What does it matter if I decide that it's better to just end it now… before things get worse…"

"What happens if things don't get worse? What if they get better?" Laxus pressed.

"Then I won't be there to see it… and that doesn't bother me," Gajeel's voice was shivering as he spoke and Laxus forced himself to laugh past the lump in his throat.

"You may be a lot of things, but you're definitely not a good liar,"

Gajeel didn't respond, just closed his eyes. Laxus could feel the gooseflesh on his arms with each chilled, easy breeze that drifted by. Gajeel didn't seem to mind the cold that was settling in with the night. His feet were bare and dangling over the empty space and for a moment a serene look came over the Iron Dragon.

"You'd be proud of me," Laxus piped, breaking whatever thoughts were going through his head, "I've been running around town for the past hour trying to find you."

"Yeah?" Gajeel smirked, if a bit half-heartedly, "I thought you hated running."

"You might not believe me, but that didn't really cross my mind," Laxus let the corner of his lip quip up just slightly, "You know, you told me you'd help me get in shape. Did you think I'd forget?"

"Of course not," Gajeel sighed, his smile quickly turning sour.

"It'd be a lot easier to run with me when you're with the living, don't you think?"

"Laxus…" Gajeel breathed, defeated again, "I can't…"

"I'm not asking you to suddenly be over this," Laxus interrupted him, "Depression… it doesn't go away overnight. I'm just asking you to give it some time…"

Gajeel just shook his head, "I can't…"

"You _can_ ," Laxus insisted, refusing to back down now, "You're one of the strongest mages I know."

"I can't make you happy," Gajeel finally forced out, startling the Thunder Mage into silence, "I can't… I'll just… drag you down. Trust me."

Laxus sat shocked for a moment, his thoughts scattered after hearing those words come from the man beside him. This wasn't about making him happy, this was about making Gajeel happy.

"You don't exist to make me happy," Laxus retorted, causing ruby eyes to pull up and meet his amber, "But if you insist, just hanging on for a little while longer will be enough."

Gajeel looked back down, "What happens if I can't… if in a week I end up back up here…"

"Then I'll be here too," Laxus reached out a hand and laid it gently on Gajeel's. They stayed in shared silence for a while, neither breaking eye contact, before Laxus finally broke, "I'll be honest… I'll need you to help me up."

"What?" Gajeel's brow furrowed, "Why?"

"I can't tell you… you'll never let me live it down."

His chuckle turned a little sour towards the end, but still it wasn't a negative noise, "You don't think we're past living things down by now?"

"You can't laugh."

"Laxus…"

"I hate heights," Laxus breathed and for the first time in a while, Gajeel broke out into a fit of laughter. It bubbled out of the back of his neck and soon his entire body was shaking from the genuine euphoria that broke through the darkness in his eyes. Laxus didn't even get mad. He just watched in quiet amusement as his friend desperately tried to recover himself.

"You fucking… I… hold on…" Gajeel eased himself back from the ledge, raised himself off of the ground, and held a hand down for the Lightning Mage, "You didn't fucking say anything."

"Then I'll say it now… the next time you try to kill yourself, can you please do it somewhere that I can talk you down from the ground?" he tried a small smile, slightly worried that maybe Gajeel wasn't ready for his morbid humor.

"I'll think about it," Gajeel grinned, if a bit sardonically.

They two walked down the hill, Laxus's mind still reeling with emotion and relief all at once. As they made it to Gajeel's house, the door whipped open so hard it smacked the side of the house. Juvia scrambled down the steps in a flurry of blue hair and skirts and wrapped her arms around Gajeel's waist, tears streaming down her face. Mira's silhouette came to the doorway as well and Lily was also scrambling to get outside.

"Gajeel promised…!" Juvia was sobbing, and Gajeel could do little more than hold her, distress clear on his face as he did so, "Gajeel said he wouldn't hurt himself anymore…"

"I'm sorry Juv…"

"Gajeel… Gajeel was going to leave Juvia alone…"

"I'm sorry…"

"Gajeel promised he'd talk to Juvia… he promised he wouldn't do this… he promised…"

"I'm sorry, Juv…"

"Gajeel is Juvia's best friend…"

"I'm sorry…"

"Promise Juvia you won't do this again… Promise!"

"I promise…"

Juvia's hysterics finally did Laxus in and he could feel the hot tears gathering and sliding down his face. He was suddenly very, very tired, but he felt just a little lighter. Mira ran up to the pair and wrapped her arm around Gajeel's. Lily was gripping onto the Iron Dragon's shoulder, nuzzling his face into his partner's neck and muttering apologies. Laxus just stood back and let the relief wash over him. There wasn't a single dry eye in the yard.

Gajeel was home and safe. For now, there wasn't much more that any of them could ask for.


	32. Chapter 32

Chapter 32:

Laxus spent most of the night at the Redfox house. It was quite deep into the early morning hours before he finally left, assured by Lily that he needn't stay. When he'd finally shambled home the exhaustion sunk him into his mattress as if he'd had bricks strapped to his feet. He fell into a fitful, worrisome sleep with dreams that haunted him into his waking. He kept seeing Gajeel, ruby eyes reflecting in the night, just as Laxus made it to the edge of the cliff. And right when he'd gone to reach out and pull him back he slipped away into a black abyss below.

Finally, he awoke to dawn's light tumbling through the slits of his curtain and he forced himself up out of bed, sleep still beguiling him to just fall back into the sheets. But he had worry in his heart and didn't want to squander time. He showered the last of his drowsiness away and dressed, heading straight for the shoddy house on the other end of town. Halfway there he realized he had forgotten his headphones and shrugged it off, not willing to turn back for them.

It felt like he was constantly wasting time.

He finally made it to the door and knocked, waiting impatiently for someone to answer. Lily greeted him, rubbing his eyes pitifully as he'd just woken. The Exceed padded into the room and tumbled back to the couch, inviting Laxus to make himself at home. Laxus nervously made his way to the kitchen, his mind flashing back to the only other time he'd been here, and busied himself searching for a kettle for tea or coffee. He took note of how bare the cupboards were, thinking maybe he could get Mira to help him get some groceries together for the pair…

That was… if she was still ok speaking to him…

He pushed the thought away as quickly as it surfaced and put some water on the oven. Lily was dozing by the time he came back out to the living room and he felt extremely out of place. Honestly, he wasn't really sure what he was doing here. What could he possibly do to help? But his worried mind had brought him here. He just needed to know Gajeel was safe.

He cast his eyes to the hall, hearing a sigh coming from one of the rooms. No doubt he was still asleep. After the night he'd had he was probably exhausted…

A creak echoed through the hall and a sound like a whine. Laxus furrowed his brow but stayed in place, not sure what to do. Should he go see if Gajeel was ok? Was it better to stay put and wait? His eyes caught a slight curl in the wallpaper and his heart dropped. It had been poorly patched, but the evidence of the last time Laxus had been down to Gajeel's room was still visible. He gritted his teeth.

Maybe it would be best just to stay in the living room.

The whistle from the kettle drew him back down to reality. He stepped back slowly and made his way to the stove, amber eyes fighting to keep him grounded to his task. There were no tea leaves, just some instant coffee, so Laxus set himself to searching cabinets for mugs. He was grabbing a couple from the top of a shelf when he heard the sounds of feet hitting the ground and stumbling out into the hall. He turned the corner just in time to see Gajeel making a frantic dash to the bathroom and slamming the door. He cast his eyes to Lily who'd also been woken by the raucous but he seemed much less alarmed than he was.

"His night terrors," he said simply and the sound coming from the bathroom suddenly made Laxus no longer in the mood for breakfast, even if it was just coffee.

"Should we do something?" Laxus muttered, but Lily only shook his head.

"It's best to just let it hash it out himself,"

"That hasn't been working very well recently, though, right?" he crossed his arms and Lily didn't meet his gaze, "What's the worst that could happen?"

"He thought I was attacking him once… that went about as well as you'd expect,"

Laxus cast his eyes to the hall again and let out a sigh. He took quiet steps and eased the door open. Gajeel was sitting on the floor, his hand over his eyes. At first glance, he could have just been resting accept for the trembling in his arms. Laxus turned his attention to a small linen closet and opened it, grabbing a towel and flipping on the warm water. When he glanced back over at Gajeel he was met with bloody eyes, wide and with pupils dilated in mild panic.

"You alright?" Laxus asked, wringing out the rag and kneeling down next to the Iron Dragon.

"Fine," he replied gruffly, taking it from him and pressing it into his face.

"Rough night?"

"You could say that…" he sighed, gripping the cloth and looking over at the blonde, "You look like hell yerself, ya know."

"Kept having nightmares," he sat down heavily next to Gajeel who watched him warily out of the corner of his eye, "What about you? Morning sickness?"

Gajeel snorted, a bit of humor touching his ruby eyes, and he replied with a sordid tone to his voice, "And here I thought I hid it so well."

"Boy or girl?" he smirked and Gajeel just shoved him roughly.

"What the hell are you doing over here so early, anyway?" Gajeel sighed, his humor leaving just as quickly as it had come, "Checking in?"

Laxus eyed him for a moment, noticing the way Gajeel was staring at his hands almost as if he wished they were something else, or maybe someone else's, "Actually… I was going to see if you'd go running with me today,"

"Running…" he hummed the word quietly, "I don't know."

"We could go to the guild instead," Laxus tried, watching the way the Iron Dragon seemed to just sink lower into the ground with the suggestion, "Juvia will be happy to see you."

Gajeel was silent, not even looking up at the blonde. He still had exhaustion hanging under his eyes and Laxus could tell he still didn't have any energy. He scratched the back of his head, trying to think of something to do.

"Well…" he sighed, pushing himself up, "I suppose it can't be helped."

Gajeel didn't make a move, just sat quietly on the tiled floor.

"Let's take a nap," Laxus held out his hand and Gajeel's eyes widened.

"What?"

"We're taking a nap… I'm still tired anyway," Laxus gripped his hand and pulled him up from the floor. Gajeel stumbled.

"Wait… I don't… shouldn't you…?"

Laxus pushed Gajeel onto the bed.

"T-together…?" red was creeping up the raven's neck and Laxus shrugged, "I mean… you can go… I'm just…"

Laxus leaned down so that his eyes were on the same level as Gajeel's, "Do you have any idea what time I got home last night? I could sleep for a week."

Laxus motioned for him to lay down and for some reason, Gajeel complied. He wasn't sure why he was letting this happen, but he was tired and as soon as he was on his blankets again he felt safe and calm. He started when he heard boots hitting the floor and then another body joined him.

"Scoot over,"

"Why don't you sleep on the couch," Gajeel muttered as Laxus eased down next to him.

"The last time I slept on your couch it killed my back," he mumbled and stretched out.

"Then go home," Gajeel growled, but his protest was half-assed. He felt strangely at ease. Laxus didn't have his hands on him, just lounged quietly beside him, hands behind his head and eyes half-closed. Their body heat was enough that together they didn't need to pull up blankets, which was fine by Gajeel. He wasn't comfortable with intimate contact right now. But a tight disquiet in his chest started to settle.

"Too late now… I'm already here."

What if Laxus tried to do something while he was asleep? The two of them had been through that before… unwanted affections. He kept his back to the Lightning Mage and refused to look at him. With his eyes shut he could almost pretend he wasn't there if it weren't for the steady sounds of him breathing behind him. Each breath seemed to make his heart misstep. Another presence so close… in his sleep he wouldn't be able to defend himself. He felt like the strings of his nerves were being wound tighter.

What if he couldn't get away? What if he couldn't fight his way out? Laxus was stronger than he was. He could overpower him in an instant.

He was laying on the table again. His wrists and legs bound down. He couldn't move, couldn't free himself by might or magic or screams. He was helpless. He felt like the world was spinning around him in madness. He couldn't be that helpless again… _He'd rather die._

A sonorous inhale and a sigh startled him back to reality. He jolted up, his heart pounding as he fought to stay quiet. He turned and glanced over at the sleeping man beside him. Laxus hadn't moved an inch. His arms were still tucked behind his head and his eyes shut as if all of the tension in his body was released with the sound of his quiet breaths. He was asleep. He must not have been kidding when he'd told Gajeel he was exhausted.

He just watched him for a while. The steady inhale and exhale, his quiet snores as he slept, the way he looked so at peace. Gajeel was jealous. He hadn't felt that kind of comfort in a long time. Slowly, he lowered himself back down to the bed, this time facing the blonde in his bed. Laid out like this, Gajeel realized how much taller Laxus was than he. It must have been three or four inches. He propped himself up by laying his head on his arm and kept watching his face. He hadn't shaved this morning. Glittery gold hairs dotted his jawline and up his cheeks. He couldn't see his scar from this angle and it made him look so much younger, like he was fresh out of high school instead of a well-established mage. Gajeel wondered how old he himself looked. The scars on his body tended to make him seem older, more war-torn and haggard. He pictured the two of them walking down the streets of Magnolia together. They would probably make an odd pair...

An odd pair indeed.

Despite himself, he was relaxing. After a few minutes of watching Laxus sleep, he found it harder and harder to keep his eyes open and eventually he too finally dozed off.

Unbeknownst to either of the mages, Lily waited on the couch for the two to come into the living room. After a few minutes, he hopped off of the sofa and padded his way down the hall. He eased the door open and froze at the sight of the two. Laxus had turned slightly in his sleep and was facing the Iron Dragon. The two were out cold, snoring loudly as they fell deeper into sleep. He decided it would probably be best not to bother them and gently eased the door closed again as he retreated.

A quiet smile played on his features.

He hadn't seen Gajeel so calm in far too long.

…

It was a few hours before Laxus was awoken by the sounds of rummaging in the room. He opened an eye just in time to catch a glimpse of tanned skin and long black hair as Gajeel drew his shirt over his shoulders. A map of scars was quickly concealed and Laxus blinked the rest of the sleep from his eyes. His foot was numb and his arms were stiff. When he finally untangled himself, he felt sore but the grogginess was quickly melting away.

"Morning…" he mumbled, stretching out to take up more of the bed. Everything smelled like Gajeel. Iron and spice and anger permeated the fabric and it made Laxus want to roll over and fall back asleep. It was strange how docile it made him.

"Afternoon, you mean," Gajeel muttered, digging through his drawer for some shorts, "What size do you wear?"

Laxus sniffed, "Why?"

Gajeel stopped and looked at him over his shoulder, a bit of hesitation in his blood-red eyes, "I thought you wanted to go running?"

Laxus blinked once, twice, and then scrambled up from the bed, suddenly realizing that he shouldn't be feeling so at home in Gajeel's bed, "Yeah, I did."

"You're not going in that are you?" Gajeel asked critically and Laxus glanced down. He had on his usual: a pair of long jeans and a collared shirt.

He smiled weakly, "Probably not the best idea."

"What size?" he muttered again, pulling a pair of shorts out and throwing them onto the bed. He turned to his closet and started flipping through shirts.

"Extra large,"

"Hmph," was his only reply and he pulled a shabby-looking tee from the back of his closet and threw it at Laxus. It had a band name that he wasn't familiar with, a shock since he liked a wide variety of music, and slash marks as if some sort of monster had lashed at it.

"I don't have any shoes," he said coolly and Gajeel straightened, turning his eyes to a shelf at the top of his closet full of shoe boxes.

"What size?"

"You're kidding…" Laxus smirked, "There's no way we wear the same size."

"No but Juvia used to buy me shoes all the time because I like to run…" he grinned, remembering something as he spoke, "She wanted it to be a surprise so she didn't ask for my size and ended up just buying me five pairs."

"Why didn't she take them back?" honestly, it sounded like something the emotional woman would do.

"She told me I could give them away," he sighed, pulling down one of the boxes and throwing them over to him, "Try those. If you like them you can have them."

"Uh… yeah," Laxus muttered and started unbuttoning his shirt. Gajeel sat back down on the bed, his shoulders hunched, looking at him casually. When it was Mira and Juvia in his room the other day, he hadn't been bothered in the slightest that he was changing in front of them but suddenly he was extremely awkward. He moved quickly, fumbling over some of the buttons as he went, when he felt the weight on the bed shift and froze. Gajeel had stood and was making his way around to the blonde.

"Nervous?" he said so quietly that Laxus took a moment to register the word. With an easy flick he undid the button at his sternum, then the next, and the next, until his hands were at his navel. Laxus's heart was racing and his mind was getting foggy. He was going to keep himself cool, though. Gajeel had made it clear he hadn't wanted anything and he wasn't going to do something that would drive him into a dark place again. Red eyes travelled swiftly up to meet his and he felt his throat start to dry. _This wasn't good_.

"You smell like Mira," he said quietly and Laxus felt his veins turn to ice.

"Jealous?" he managed just barely. He felt like Gajeel was gazing right through to his soul and it was driving him mad.

His eyes were predatory slits and in the muted light Laxus thought he could fall right in to the malice swimming there, "It pisses me off."

He felt like he couldn't breathe, "It pissed me off too."

"Then why did you do it?" he felt like he was telling his lover he'd cheated on them, but he really had nothing to be ashamed of. He and Gajeel weren't anything. He shouldn't have to defend his actions in the slightest… so why did he feel he had to?

"You're not the only one who does stupid shit when they're mad," he breathed, "…It's not a good excuse…"

He broke his furious contact suddenly and Laxus felt cold as he retracted his hands. On impulse, he reached out to stop him and this time it was Gajeel's turn to freeze.

"I'm sorry," Laxus said as calmly as he could. He felt two different heats creeping across his body, one that was starting from his neck and slowly trying to march up his cheeks to the tips of his ears, and another, completely different, slinking its way down from the base of his stomach. Gajeel's hands were shaking again and the look on his face was unsure. Laxus didn't want to scare him away so he tried his best to be still when Gajeel gripped the top of his collar and leaned close.

"You shouldn't be… it's not like…"

"Right…" Laxus felt like his heart was going to thump its way out of his ears, "but still."

Gajeel's face was incredibly close to his and he wanted to cross the distance but he couldn't, could he? He didn't have too much time to contemplate it, because Gajeel took the initiative. He tilted his head to the side and his lips brushed Laxus's gently, timidly, and then a second time with more force. Laxus's mind was swimming and he was being pulled into beautiful, refracting red eyes. Gajeel's tongue ran against his lips and he almost lost it, the entire time just telling his body that it needed to remain perfectly still. For the most part it obeyed, excluding an organ that was quickly making his pants too tight.

Gajeel pulled away leaving the blonde breathless. They just sat there for an impossibly long moment as if they both had to recover from such a simple thing. Laxus unconsciously brought his hand up to his lips, running the knuckle against his bottom lip as he remembered the touch of Gajeel's. Gajeel was just gazing at him with those intimidating, all-encapsulating ruby eyes. He almost looked like he was going to lean in to kiss him again and Laxus didn't know if he'd be able to keep his body still a second time; he was already fighting the urge to pull Gajeel close.

Gajeel finally diverted his gaze, "Sorry…"

"No, no… you're fine," Laxus felt like he was speaking too rapidly, he probably sounded too eager, "It's just… I thought you didn't…"

"I don't," Gajeel said sternly, more to himself than to Laxus, "I'm not into guys…"

"Right… me neither… usually…" he was fumbling around like a schoolboy the first time they're alone with a girl. He felt incredibly small in that moment and it irritated him.

"Usually?" Gajeel smirked a little half-heartedly.

"Mira tells me I'm bi…" Laxus babbled, feeling like he was talking too much and he desperately needed to stop, "But you know… labels…"

"Right… I guess…" he was gripping onto the hem of his shorts, obviously uncomfortable. His thoughts were elsewhere and it was obvious as he looked thoughtfully at the floor. His lips moved and he breathed words so quietly Laxus almost thought he heard, "…and not a single drop of whiskey…"

"Hmm?"

"Get dressed," Gajeel snapped, standing suddenly and heading for the door, "We'll go out when you're ready."

With that he slammed the door and Laxus was left sitting on the bed completely shaken, but somehow satisfied. If the slowness didn't kill him first, maybe this could work?


	33. Chapter 33

Chapter 33:

Laxus finally dressed, after waiting for a few moments for his body to calm itself, and walked into the living room where Lily was chattering happily with Gajeel across from him. They almost looked normal except for the restrained look in Lily's eyes as he tried to hold conversation. Gajeel's rubies flashed over to Laxus as he approached and Lily's voice dropped as he followed his gaze, a cheerful expression coming to his features as soon as Laxus entered.

"Laxus," he regarded him politely, "you guys are going running?"

"We're going to try," he said meekly, attempting to push his hands into his pockets before quickly realizing his shorts had none, "I'm not really good at it."

"Don't worry, Gajeel will help push you," Pantherlily grinned, "He knows some tricks for beginners."

"I'm in your hands, then," Laxus smirked over at Gajeel who rolled his eyes as he stood, heading for the door.

"Watch it, Sparky."

Laxus cringed at the nickname.

"Sparky?" Lily sputtered, quickly covering his mouth and trying to hide his laughter, "Cute…"

Laxus rushed for the door, "If he starts calling me Sparky," he growled, following the raven out into the street, "I'm blaming you."

"Go ahead," Gajeel shot him a wry grin, "Sparky."

"I'm not going to give you the satisfaction of letting that annoy me," Laxus growled as he walked up beside him. Gajeel just rolled his eyes again, making Laxus's blood spike agitatedly in the process, and he started down the road at a quick pace. Laxus kept up with him easily.

"We're going to jog," Gajeel said coolly, running his hands through his long hair and tying it up into a loose bun, "I don't know how far you can go so we'll just run until you can't anymore and then start walking. Sound good?"

"Fine by me," Laxus shrugged. He wasn't a runner, never had been, but he didn't mind as long as it got Gajeel out into the fresh air. He knew he liked being outside. It probably didn't help him to keep himself shut up in his stuffy house. Maybe this would help him feel more like himself, "I'll follow you."

After a few more minutes to warm up, Gajeel took off at an easy pace. Laxus tried his best to stay on his heels for as long as possible, and for a few blocks it was relatively easy. He tried to mimic the Iron Mage as they went through the streets of Magnolia but he knew there was no way he could compare. Gajeel looked sleek and took long, graceful strides like a puma as it raced through the jungle. Laxus, on the other hand, felt like a new, bumbling deer; barely evading tripping on cracks and keeping out of peoples' way as he tried to keep up with the man in front of him. After a while his lungs were screaming and he was starting to feel light-headed. He cursed himself quietly. He had to have run four times this distance when he was looking for Gajeel. But panic did strange things to the body, that was certain, and soon he was unable to push himself any further.

He stopped, gasping for air and putting his hands on his knees. His body trembled slightly from need for oxygen and he was fighting to catch his breath. Gajeel stopped his procession and put his hands on his hips, breathing in deeply but not nearly as strained as Laxus. A light sheen covered his body from sweat and he walked easily over to the doubled-over blonde and lent him a hand.

"Stand up straight," he huffed, "It'll get more air into yer lungs."

"Yeah…?" he gasped, pulling himself back up and feeling a pain in his side as he did so, "This sucks…"

"It gets better. C'mon, we'll walk for a while,"

They went on like that, running until Laxus couldn't stand it anymore, and then walking until he could finally breath easily again, for about an hour before Gajeel navigated them back to his house. Laxus felt shaky but proud of himself. He could lift weights just fine but he'd never been any good with running. Maybe it was having someone in front of him to strive to meet, but he did far better than he thought he would. Gajeel stayed mostly silent through the whole thing, no doubt his mind still on what had happened earlier that day, and he made little comment on whether he thought Laxus did well or not.

Not that Laxus needed his validation. He felt just fine on his own.

Or so he told himself.

They agreed to meet the next morning and Laxus left his house with a new pair of shoes and shirt, as both were sizes Gajeel didn't wear. He felt stupid and light-hearted as he walked home that day, clinging to the shirt Gajeel had given him like some girl who'd just gotten a shirt from her boyfriend. But he had hope that maybe things would be a little better tomorrow and spent the rest of the afternoon looking up ways to make him a better runner.

The next day he rose again with the sun and dressed, this time skipping the shower as he figured he'd need one after his run, and made his way to Gajeel's. Once again he arrived before Gajeel woke up although Lily was already waiting with some tea and breakfast. Again, he heard Gajeel wake up restlessly, although this time there was no rush to the bathroom, and he emerged dressed for their morning run with his hair once again up in a bun to keep it off of his neck.

And they ran.

Each day was like this and each day he got a little bit better and the light got a little brighter in Gajeel's eyes. After about a week, Gajeel was waiting for him with Lily in the morning and the week after that they could both run side-by-side for the full hour. Their conversations got a little easier and Gajeel would laugh a little more and scowl a little less. It was slow and tedious and there was no mention of the morning when they'd slept together and kissed. It nagged at Laxus but he refused to bring it to Gajeel's attention, worried that it might jeopardize the easy-going relationship that they had begun to form.

Finally, after a month of running together, Gajeel seemed to be in brighter spirits. Maybe he had woken up on the right side of the bed or maybe he'd finally slept a full night without any of his nightmares, but he seemed genuinely happy to see Laxus as he knocked on the door that morning. He even mentioned that he felt up to going to the guild that day, and honestly, Laxus was elated. Maybe he was actually on the mend; the relief that thought brought him made him feel like a weight had been lifted from his shoulders.

"We can go after we get done with our run," Laxus mused as he drank his tea. Even Lily seemed in better spirits than usual, flying around the room instead of walking, and taking their dishes as they got ready to go.

As they started their usual warmup walk, Gajeel was humming quietly to himself. Laxus couldn't help himself, he felt like he had to say something.

"You're in a good mood. Finally get laid?" he smirked and Gajeel shot him a coy look.

"Wouldn't you like to know," he quipped back as he pulled his hair up like usual.

"It wasn't Levy, was it?" he said coolly.

"With Jet," was all he retorted, not giving him the courtesy of even glancing his way with his reply.

"Juvia,"

"She's like my sister," he snorted, his face twisting into a mock-grimace at the mention.

"Cana?"

"You're really reaching," he laughed, picking up his pace and starting their jog.

"You have to give me a hint at least," Laxus kept up with him easily, his hard work finally paying off. Gajeel just shook his head, his studs glittering in the light of the sunrise as they made their way along their regular route. The fall had fully set in and the mornings and nights were quite cool now. Their breaths caused puffs of fog with each labored gasp and most days Laxus found his hands almost numb by the time they got back to Gajeel's house.

"I just felt good this morning," he said honestly and Laxus found it hard to conceal his smile. That was another thing that was new: blatant honesty. He had never realized how much he needed that in a person. He used to think his relationship with Freed, Bixlow and Evergreen was close but as of lately he started to realize that it was more superficial than he'd originally thought. Or maybe it was just because it was Gajeel that he felt that way. It was hard for him to really tell anymore.

"Well, I'm glad," Laxus huffed as the run finally began to catch up with him. The silence between them was comfortable as they delved into their own thoughts while they ran. Gajeel's eyes were far away again, lingering on things Laxus could only guess at. He'd fallen in love with those eyes of his; the way they changed hues almost as if with his mood and energy. Some days they seemed a deep blood-maroon and others a brilliant fire-red. And then, on days like today, they truly glittered like rubies in the morning light.

"You know…" Laxus panted as he began falling behind, "If you're… holding back… you can go… on ahead…"

"And leave you behind?" he grinned, his sharper teeth flashing, "I'd never dream of it."

"I just… think I'm… holding… you back…"

Laxus finally broke, stopping his jog and falling into a quick walk. Gajeel, however, didn't stop and instead just slowed his pace so that he was jogging alongside the Thunder Dragon. He grinned mischievously at the blonde.

"In Phantom, we used to sing cadences to keep pace," he recollected lightly, "What kind of songs do you like?"

"It's not… enough… to be better… you have to… sing?" Laxus growled and Gajeel only smirked wickedly in return.

"I bet you like that girly pop shit," he leered, jogging a circle around Laxus as he desperately tried to catch his breath, "something upbeat? Like 'Walking on Sunshine'?"

"No," Laxus snapped, "That's annoying… as hell…"

"What about 'Good Grief'?"

"Good grief?"

They were nearing the bridge and Laxus was finally getting a hold of himself. His breathing was less erratic and the stitch in his side was finally fading away.

 _"Every minute and every hour,_

 _I miss you I miss you I miss you more._

 _Every stumble and each misfire,_

 _I miss you I miss you I miss you more."_

Laxus wrinkled his nose and he tried to swat at Gajeel but he danced just out of reach. He didn't have the energy to pursue him so he begrudgingly let it happen, annoyance bubbling up inside him at Gajeel's overconfidence.

Laxus got a wicked idea in his head as they ambled their way across the bridge. He stopped, pretending to need the break and leaned up against the railing. Gajeel stopped his jog, his eyes alight with a haughty smile.

"What's the matter, Sparky? Too tired-"

Laxus gripped him by his shirt and pulled, sending the Iron Dragon tumbling over the railing to the water below. A splash sent flecks of water up to moisten the ground and Laxus cringed at the chill.

 _Shit… that might have been overboard…_

Gajeel sputtered up to the surface, his arms wrapped around himself as he shivered in the chilly water. His eyes were on fire as he glared up at Laxus.

"You… you fucking… what the _hell_ Laxus!" he spat as the shaking became more violent, "It's fucking freezing!"

"You were working so hard you looked like you needed to cool off," Laxus grinned from his perch on the railing, crossing his arms and leaning against it as he looked down at Gajeel. Gajeel jumped up to grab the edge of the bridge only to have his grip slip and send him tumbling back into the freezing water. He surfaced again, this time his teeth chattering.

"You just wait until I get my hands on you…!" he seethed.

"Yo! Gajeel! You trying to make yourself rust?" Natsu's voice sounded and drew the attentions of both mages from the bridge. Natsu, Lucy and Happy were all headed their way, obviously laughing from the sight.

"Shaddup flame-brain!" he growled, wading to the edge.

"Ah, calm down," Natsu offered a hand and Gajeel grasped it firmly, "It's just a little wat-"

Gajeel pulled him in as well and Lucy squealed and jumped back to avoid the frigid splash. Happy laughed and flew away, saying something about the blonde being too heavy to carry to safety. Natsu surfaced, tremors wracking his body as Gajeel laughed.

"What's the matter? Did I put out your fire?" Gajeel grinned and Natsu jumped up to grab his arm. The two flailed as they fell back into the water and wrestled, trying to either get the other to give up or drown; Laxus was finding it hard to discern which. He felt a pang of jealousy nag at the back of his mind as he watched Natsu put his hands on the raven. He tried to shake it off. Natsu had said himself that he didn't have feelings for Gajeel, at least not anymore. But just knowing that something _did_ happen, and he was still fuzzy to the details, just made him want to break up whatever contact they had…

"It's good to see them getting along," Lucy's cheerful voice drew his attention away from the fighting Slayers, "We've all been worried about him."

"Yeah," he said quietly, turning to glance down at Gajeel who was racing Natsu to the edge.

"I'm surprised… of all the people to step up and befriend him in his time of need, it was you," she pondered slyly, "He must be pretty happy that you stepped in."

Laxus suddenly regarded her much less kindly than before, "Everyone needs someone when they're in a place like that. If it wasn't me I'm sure it would have been someone else."

"Is that the _only_ reason?" she pressed, eyeing him shrewdly.

"Is it wrong to make sure your comrades are ok?" he growled back at her, suddenly feeling like he was being interrogated. She opened her mouth to say something else but the two had reached where they stood on the bridge.

Gajeel stripped off his shirt and threw the water-logged thing at Laxus who tried to dodge but Natsu was by his side, impeding his retreat. It smacked his chest heavily and the frigid water seeped into his shirt and through his fingers as he caught it. Natsu wrapped his arms around Laxus's waist, soaking his back in the process, and kept him still as Gajeel wrung out his hair on him. By the end of it he too was damp and freezing.

"You two going to the guild later?" Natsu beamed, his clothes already dried from his natural heat.

"Assuming we don't die from pneumonia," Laxus hissed and Gajeel elbowed him.

"And whose fault it that?" he growled, shivering.

"Great," Natsu laughed happily, "I'll tell Mira. She's been asking about you guys."

Laxus's brow furrowed, "She has?"

"Yeah. We've been worried about you," his grin faded a tad, "You haven't been to the guild in a while."

"Has it really been that long?" Gajeel muttered as if he hadn't actually realized that almost two months had passed since he'd last been. Laxus crossed his arms.

"Gramps has been on my back lately, so I've stayed away," he lied smoothly and Natsu didn't think anything of it. Gajeel just stared at the ground, still trembling slightly, "Tell Mira we'll see her later."

"Sounds good," Natsu beamed, as easy going as ever, and the three left them alone on the bridge. Gajeel let out a heartfelt sigh as he turned towards his house.

"Must be nice being that carefree all the time," he mumbled, wrapping his arms around himself as he walked.

"Pretty annoying if you ask me," Laxus wrung out the shirt Gajeel had thrown at him, "He never takes anything seriously."

"He does… just in his own way," Gajeel seemed far away again and Laxus didn't like it. Today had started out so positive, he didn't want it to suddenly slip away.

"I guess…" was all he could think to say and he threw the damp clothing at his back. He cast his eyes to the buildings around them, trying to think of something that could lighten Gajeel's spirits. He guessed it would be difficult now that he was cold and miserable. Maybe after they'd both bathed and dressed he'd feel a little better?

"Laxus? Hey, Laxus!" a familiar voice made the two stop and Laxus turned to search out its owner. His amber eyes fell on Freed and Bixslow as they approached from behind them. They were both dressed casually and Freed's hair was tied back into a neat bun low on his head.

"Hey," he felt a smile tugging at the corners of his lips, "What's up?"

"We're heading to the bathhouse," Bixslow grinned, his eyes alight with a strange mischief that always seemed to live there. Laxus used to think it was because of the strange magic he always employed but as he got to know him better he started thinking it was just his bizarre personality.

"Bathhouse, Bathhouse," his totems chittered happily.

"Would you like to join us? You look…" Freed looked him up at down, "Cold."

"We were actually just heading to Gajeel's house," Laxus put his hands on his hips and looked over at Gajeel who seemed increasingly uncomfortable, "We've been running."

"Laxus, you're always seeking new ways to improve yourself. I'm impressed, as always," Freed gushed, smiling proudly, "I strive to be more like you."

"Right," Laxus scratched at the back of his neck, not sure how much he wanted to deal with the two today, "Gajeel's been giving me pointers."

"Gajeel?" both Bixslow and Freed seemed confused, "You're taking advice from him?"

Laxus crossed his arms, immediately agitated. Freed saw it and began backpedaling, always trying to make him happy. It was patronizing at times, this one not excluded.

"Of course, that's wonderful that you can admit your own shortcomings and get help from others," Freed began, looking over at Gajeel who seemed to want to sink into the ground, "Gajeel, would you like to come too? We could all talk about our different routines?"

"I uh…"

"He's shy, he's shy," Bixslow's babies chimed in and Gajeel's eyes flashed angrily.

"I don't think we're in the mood," Laxus started but Gajeel just crossed his arms.

"No, it's fine, let's go. It'll be great," he growled, "I'm fucking cold anyway."

"Great," Freed smiled and Bixslow shrugged, his children happily repeating 'great' as they headed for the doors. After convincing Bixslow not to take them into the bathhouse with them, the four stripped down and made their way to the warm water. Laxus dipped his freezing feet in and felt as if the water were scalding him at first, but his body slowly adjusted and soon he was sinking in up to his shoulders and letting the cold of autumn melt away.

Gajeel was the last to saunter up to the water and he kept his towel wrapped protectively around his waist. He eyed the water for a long moment and made no move to get in until Freed and Bixslow's backs were turned from him. When he did finally let go of his last boundary, he sunk into the water quickly and kept further away. Laxus tried not to let his face show the tense worry he had because of it. What was he trying so desperately to keep from being seen?

"What have you been up to lately?" Freed's voice tugged his attention away from the raven who as still a few feet away, "You haven't been at the guild."

"That seems to be the question today," Laxus muttered, "I've just been preoccupied."

"With what?" Bixslow pressed, his maroon eyes darting towards Gajeel for a brief second before falling back to him, that odd impish look coming to his features. The look on Gajeel's face in response to Bixslow's inquiring stare made it obvious he was uncomfortable with the conversation turning to him so Laxus made up his mind to search for something else.

"I've actually been looking for a new place," he sighed, watching Freed as he pulled out some soap and started washing himself.

"What's wrong with the place you're at?" Freed piped, bringing his long emerald hair over his shoulder to run the soap through it, "I thought your landlord liked you as a renter?"

Bixslow glanced over at Gajeel, "He's the only tenant that pays his rent on time."

Gajeel blinked, obviously not interested at all with the conversation, "Ah."

"Apparently he's retiring. He's selling all his properties and moving somewhere more tropical,"

"Really? Good for him," Freed smiled wading over to Laxus, "Mind if I wash your back?"

"That's fine," Laxus crossed his arms and looked over at Bixslow who was studying Gajeel intently. Gajeel just sat awkwardly. He wasn't usually in the company of the two and even Laxus had to admit that they tended to be a bit much when they got their heads together. Between Bixslow's babies and the way Freed always made over him, even he got overwhelmed after too long. Evergreen was usually the one that was smoothing things over and keeping the guys in line, "So I've been looking for a new place to stay. I don't want to have to go back to the dorms if I don't have to."

"You could move in with me," Freed's voice held a smile as he massaged his back gently, "My house has an extra room and the rent is decent."

"Yeah?" Laxus hadn't actually thought much about finding a new place. He figured if it came down to it he'd move in with Gramps for a short while. He didn't have much as far as furniture went. It was mostly just his bedroom that he needed to pack up, "How much?"

"One hundred and twenty thousand a month," Freed let his hands linger for just a moment after he was done before he removed himself.

"You have expensive taste," Bixslow laughed, his tongue hanging out of his mouth, "Anything over ninety is expensive."

"I refuse to settle," was Freed's only reply.

"I'll think on it," Laxus sighed, "I just hate that I'll be moving when it's cold out."

"That is tedious," Freed let out an agitated breath, "he really should have given you more notice. But he probably isn't worried about poor business practice since he's getting out of the business… Gajeel, would you like me to wash your back?"

Gajeel's eyes widened, "I… no."

"Oh, don't be so shy," Freed waved the denial off and made is way over. Gajeel hunched his shoulders and gritted his teeth, fighting back saying something as Freed approached with soap in hand, "Where do you live at, Gajeel? You don't stay at Fairy Hills, do you?"

"I, uh…" he cringed slightly at Freed's touch but he pretended not to notice, "Lily and I rent a place over on the east side of town."

" _Really_?" Freed stressed the word as if he couldn't believe it, "What's rent like over in that part of town? Isn't it a little rougher over there?"

"I mean… I've never had any issues…"

"I don't doubt it," Freed pressed, touching something on Gajeel's back that made him start, "With all these scars I bet no one even thinks to mess with you."

"Freed," Laxus snapped and Freed looked up, feigning he had no idea why Laxus had suddenly gotten angry with him.

"I meant it as a compliment," he said innocently, "How did you get all these? They look old…"

"Freed, leave him alone," Laxus growled and this time he threw his hands up in silent submission.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you," he backtracked again, slowly wading away from the raven who was clearly uncomfortable, "I think it's great you let your body heal naturally instead of using magic. I can only imagine it must have been difficult. I wish I had that kind of commitment, really. Even Laxus has his scar and tattoo… I just don't understand how you guys do it. Something like that on your body permanently…"

"I hope you never get seriously injured," Bixslow smirked, his eyes wild again, "Getting scarred will be the end of you."

"I think I'm going to go ahead and leave," Gajeel muttered, backing up towards the stairs.

"Oh, don't go, Gajeel. Honestly, I didn't mean any harm by it," Freed started.

"You're too much, Freed," Laxus smirked, drawing his attention, "You scared him away."

"What? It was an accident," Freed protested, turning back to look at Laxus. Laxus drew their attention so Gajeel could make his escape, grabbing his towel and swiftly covering himself.

"I think I'll go ahead and follow him," Laxus sighed as if it were a nuisance, "Make sure you didn't make him upset."

"But Laxus, you didn't wash _my_ back,"

"Maybe you should have thought about that before you were rude to Gajeel," he growled back at him, flashing him a glare as he made his way for the stairs.

"Laxus," Bixslow called after him, causing him to stop and turn to his friend. Bixslow was an intimidating person. His ability to use Figure Eyes made him scarily perceptive and he could easily see the soul of the person he was gazing at. It always worried him when Bixslow took on anything that wasn't a humorous tone of voice because it often meant he saw something bad… or at least not good.

"Yeah?"

"Be careful. That guy has a lot going on," he said casually, lounging against the wall. Freed looked from Bixslow to Laxus, clearly confused as to what was going on. Laxus couldn't be too surprised. Knowing him, he'd probably known for a while that he'd had feelings for Gajeel. He should have realized that the reason why he was studying Gajeel so intently was because he had wanted to know more about the raven. It was invasive and alarming, but it was Bixslow. That was why he was such a good mage.

"I know," was all he replied as he left, grabbing a towel to wrap around himself as he made his way back to the lockers. He glanced down the hall and didn't see him but noticed that his clothes were still out to dry. He heard the sound of running water and turned to go towards the showers. There was only one working and he was certain he knew who was using it.

"Gajeel?" he called, making out his silhouette behind the curtain, "You alright?"

"Fine," he replied curtly. Laxus crossed his arms.

"You don't sound fine," he pressed, his heart beating a little faster as he thought about being bold, "Do you mind if I come in?"

There was a moment of unsure silence but Gajeel didn't say anything.

"Gajeel… I'm coming in…" he called one more time before shedding his towel and hanging it up on one of the hooks. He eased the curtain open and was met with molten lava eyes, "You alright?"

Gajeel diverted his gaze and stepped back as Laxus approached. He was holding his wrist and keeping his hands low as if he were trying to cover himself. Laxus raised an eyebrow at him but Gajeel didn't make an attempt to answer. He tilted his head to the side, unsure if he should press the issue or not.

"Listen… Freed is just touchy. He didn't mean anything by it," he stepped closer and Gajeel still didn't meet his gaze, "What are you trying to cover up?"

"Scars," he muttered and Laxus's brow furrowed.

"From what?" the silence that followed was enough to give him an answer, "Why?"

"She got angry because I wouldn't go along with that she wanted…"

"No, no," he stopped him, not wanting to make him think about Bianca any more than he had to, "Why are you covering them?"

Gajeel's gaze was boring ferociously into the ground and red was creeping up his neck, "It's… ugly."

Laxus processed what he'd said for a moment and in the silence there was just the sound of the water tapping against the tiled floor. He tilted his head to the side and looked down at him, trying to think of something to say.

"I bet it's not as bad as you think," Laxus said quietly, not wanting to reach out to him for fear he'd make him even more upset.

"I mean… they're all pretty… ugly," he muttered, trying to make his voice sound flippant but not quite making it.

"What?" Laxus felt his heart beginning to beat harder, "These?"

He reached a hand out touched a thin white line that was crossing across his bicep. Gajeel tensed and he clenched his jaw. He finally brought his eyes up to meet Laxus, a quiet plea there to just put it to rest, but Laxus's heart was already pounding and he felt angry heat bubbling up in his chest. Laxus reached out his other hand, touched the scars of cigarette burns that were still trying to heal.

"Laxus…" Gajeel hissed, "…don't."

Laxus didn't quite listen. He took a hold of his fist and brought it up to his face. Gajeel's calloused hands were shaking slightly and his pupils were starting to dilate. He closed his right eye as he brushed Gajeel's knuckle against the off-colored flesh of his scar. He could see the vein on Gajeel's neck tighten as he clenched his jaw.

"Do you think mine is ugly?" he murmured into his wrist.

Gajeel looked away again and but his thumb brushed against Laxus's face softly.

"There's nothing wrong with you," Laxus said gently and Gajeel tensed at the words and closed his eyes, "Your scars just tell a story of what you've been through… what you've survived…"

"You heard Freed. They scare people away; make me look like some sort of…"

"Then let the bastards think what they want to think," Laxus growled, getting angry despite himself, "They don't matter. Your scars are one of the things I like about you."

Surprise rose to his scarlet eyes and red began creeping up his neck again, "You don't mean that…"

Laxus growled, "If you keep talking like that I'm going to do something that will make you upset."

Gajeel cringed back, "Laxus…" he put up his free hand, "Listen… you need to know…"

"I need to know what?" he released Gajeel's hand and took a step back, realizing how much his blood was boiling and trying to calm down. He was being too forceful again and he kicked himself, "Sorry… you're not into it…"

Gajeel clenched his teeth and balled up his fists, "That's…"

"It's fine," Laxus stopped him, taking another step so that he was completely across the shower from him, "It's my fault. I need to get a better grip of myself."

"Laxus…" Gajeel hissed, closing his eyes against emotion that was suddenly bubbling up in his chest.

Laxus froze. What was he doing wrong? He'd backed down. He'd put space between them but it just seemed to make Gajeel even more upset. He was so confused. Should he be advancing? Backing down? Should he just leave? Stop apologizing? What was he doing wrong?

He took a breath and tried to bury his pride at his feet, "I don't know… what you want me to do."

Gajeel finally opened his eyes and he glared down at the ground. He gripped his arm so tightly that Laxus had to fight the urge to stop him. He was going to give himself bruises…

"I'm impotent," Gajeel ground out and Laxus felt like the world suddenly stopped for a moment.

"You're… what?" Laxus took in a sharp breath.

Gajeel let out a frustrated noise in the back of his neck, "I can't…"

"No, I know what… I'm sorry," he needed to stop talking. He was making things worse, "I know what that means I just… I don't understand."

"I told you," Gajeel growled through gritted teeth, his voice low as if he were worried someone would hear him speaking, "I can't make you happy. I can't give you what you want. I… I've tried…"

"You don't have to make me happy," Laxus was stumbling over himself. His mind couldn't catch up with what was going on, "You told me, you're not into guys, that's fine…"

"You don't…!" Gajeel caught himself raising his voice and then dropped it, "You don't understand, Laxus."

"Ok," he kept his voice level, "You're right. Tell me, then."

"You were right," Laxus started to open his mouth to speak but Gajeel put up a hand to stop him, "You were right. I had feelings for you. I asked you to follow me out there because… I wanted you."

Laxus's heart was shuttering in his chest, a feeling of elation suddenly fighting to consume him. He was right? Gajeel wanted him? Then why did this feel like a rejection? Why was he so agitated? Laxus fought to control his confusion and emotions. He needed to stay level headed… to listen.

"Ever since Bianca, I haven't… I can't…" Gajeel was fighting with his pride and his anger and hurt and it was hard to watch. Laxus desperately wanted to reach out a hand but he kept himself firmly rooted in place, not wanting to ruin anything, "Whenever I try to think about doing anything… intimate… I'm back there again... tied down… in the dark… and the… the heat…"

He was glaring down at his hands as if they had the answers and he just couldn't understand what it was they held. Finally, he sighed and his shoulders went slack. He was defeated again, and tired, and everything negative that he'd been fighting so hard not to be. The depression was creeping steadily across his face and Laxus felt like he was sinking too. Just when he was starting to think they were making progress…

"I feel helpless," he whispered, "She's dead… she's dead but she took my fucking body away from me… and I don't think I can get it back."


	34. Chapter 34

Chapter 34:

Laxus was stunned. He was completely at a loss of what to do or say. Gajeel was standing defeated before him and he didn't think the sound of water pattering against tile could be any louder. Gajeel refused to look at him, seeming as if he were ready to sink into the ground at any moment. Laxus needed to break the silence. The longer the raven sat in his own thoughts the darker his eyes got.

He crossed the open space between them and saw Gajeel startle at the sudden movement. Laxus hated seeing him like this. He was caving in on himself, self-destructing. He was watching him on the ledge all over again, just waiting for a reason to jump. What could he do? What does a person say to someone who has been hurt so badly that don't even understand their own body any longer? His mind was bubbling like carbonated water; tiny little ideas that fizzled away before they could become anything substantial.

He reached carefully and pulled some ebony locks away from Gajeel's shoulder. Ruby eyes regarded him coldly as he tried to reign back in his emotions. He was trying to pull the curtain back down and hide his broken parts. Laxus could tell by the way he clenched his jaw and leaned away from his touch. He wanted to tell him he didn't have to. He didn't have to be strong all the time, didn't have to hide what was truly going on.

Pieces were starting to align in Laxus's mind. Gajeel had been slightly standoffish since their kiss. He'd refused to be alone with Laxus and the morning they'd slept together was their last. He always kept a distance, refused to touch Laxus unless he absolutely had to. If all this was going on inside him, how had he been able to stand being near him? He was gripped by how blind he was… or maybe how skilled Gajeel was at hiding the turmoil he'd been just barely staying afloat in. He'd really not even scratched the surface of everything hiding under that iron armor. He didn't want Gajeel to recede back behind his shield. This was good, wasn't it? If Laxus could know the problem he could find a solution, even if it wasn't an easy one. He could only help if he knew what was going on. He was desperately trying to find something to say… to show he understood and cared… but he'd always been so bad at this. He'd never been very in touch with his own emotions let alone someone else's.

Mira's words haunted him. _Show some weakness_. He still hadn't really figured out what that had meant.

"I'm really fucking blind, huh?" Laxus muttered, bending down to catch Gajeel's eyes, "Or maybe you're just really good at being strong."

"Strong…" Gajeel spat the word out bitterly, "Hardly."

"You are," Laxus said earnestly, maybe even too much so, "I don't think I could have been able to handle it. I probably would have lost my mind…"

Red was creeping up Gajeel's neck again, "I feel like I have sometimes."

Laxus clenched and unclenched his jaw, "Is there… any way…?"

"Any way, what?" Gajeel's eyes were guarded as he looked up at the blonde.

"I want to help you… but I don't know how," he admitted quietly, "Everything I do just seems to make things worse."

"It doesn't make it worse…" Gajeel muttered. They were fumbling around each other again. They were awkward and confused and wanted something and didn't want something. Laxus was very aware that this was going to be difficult; this was going to take time. But he was willing to wait if Gajeel was willing to try. He just needed to find a way to help him recover, to become himself again.

Laxus chewed his lip, "They're bad memories… yeah?"

"Yeah…" his ruby eyes were muted, trying to read into whatever Laxus was saying.

"Would it help if…" he paused, suddenly extremely unsure of what he was about to say.

"…if?"

"If we made some good ones?"

Gajeel became very still and his expression darkened, "I don't think you understand."

"I mean… it's worth a shot, right? Maybe you'll find out you're not as bad as you think?" Laxus tried, still not making a move to touch him just in case it wasn't something he was ready for, "Alone… your mind tends to wander to darker places…"

"What… what do you want to do…?" Gajeel brought his eyes up slowly, flicking up Laxus's body quickly in the process. It wasn't the lingering glance of a lover trying to entice him forward. It was insecure and tense, but he made an attempt.

Laxus slowly leaned down and pressed his lips against Gajeel's. It was timid and Laxus once again felt like he was some small kid getting kissed for the first time. It just wasn't what he was used to or what he was expecting. He was used to the lips of a woman that yielded and tried to please him and also let him dominate. Kissing Gajeel was an entirely different experience. He was harsh despite being unsure and his lips didn't part and sigh into his mouth. Instead they kissed him back just a little forcefully.

Laxus was so tense and his heart was pounding in his chest as he pulled back slightly, eyes like citrine gemstones as they kept Gajeel's rubies.

"Ok?" Laxus breathed and watched the red crawling up Gajeel's neck to tip his ears.

"Yeah…"

"Can I touch you?" his heart was pounding even louder in his ears. Gajeel didn't respond but he didn't pull away from him as he brought a hand up to once again touch the scar on his chest. He leaned down and pressed his lips against his tanned skin. He was softer than Laxus thought he'd be and he ran his tongue against the rough line easily, coaxing a sigh from the raven. He made his way down, trailing his lips across his skin as he made his way down his chest. Gajeel's hand was on the wall as if he were using it to stay standing and his arms were trembling slightly. Laxus stopped his procession downward as Gajeel's breathing became more frantic. He was listening intently, trying so hard to make sure he didn't make any missteps.

"Are you alright?" he breathed, feeling a shiver working its way down his spine. It was so difficult to keep calm. Maybe he couldn't do this after all.

"Fine," was all he could seem to manage through the quiet worry, "It's fine."

"Do you want me to stop?" he was taking another step forward. They were almost chest to chest now and Gajeel was trying his best to stand straighter, to seem more confident than he felt. He didn't respond to the question, just reached his hand out and let his knuckles trail along Laxus's chin. He didn't mean for it to happen, but the touch sent a strike of lightning straight through Laxus's body. Laxus gripped his wrist, kissed him kindly on the soft flesh just below his palm. Fresh scars dotted from his recent battles with his depression and Laxus followed the trail up his forearm to the larger, angry white strikes from some past fight. He let his teeth trail against the metal studs and Gajeel visibly tensed.

Laxus pulled back, expecting to see fear or anger or in his eyes but instead was met with molten hunger. Laxus suddenly found it extremely hard to contain himself. He kissed him again and this time it wasn't timid. It was ambitious and lustful and he stifled a moan as he got so close he could feel Gajeel's skin pressing against his own. He ran out his tongue and felt the heat of Gajeel's mouth. Desire was building inside of him and he shivered at the thought that it might be in Gajeel as well. He ran his hand down Gajeel's chest, feeling each rise and fall as his hands glossed over toned muscle. He was still gripping Gajeel's wrist, harder this time, as if letting him go would mean he'd suddenly disappear.

"Laxus…" Gajeel breathed, breaking their kiss and causing Laxus to nip at his jawline. He let a growl slip through his lips as he ran his tongue against the solid muscle on Gajeel's neck. He could feel it tauten and a slight tremor was starting in the man against him.

"Laxus… let me go…!" Gajeel's voice trembled but it didn't register to Laxus as to why. He was marveling at the feeling of Gajeel's heat against his chest. He kissed upwards, letting his free hand wander across Gajeel's naval and then dipping lower…

Gajeel's hands were suddenly on his shoulders, pushing him away and holding him there. Laxus froze and his heart sank slightly. Gajeel's eyes were wide and unnerved, his hands were shaking and he was clutching Laxus as if at any moment he was going to rip him out of his way. Laxus stayed still and watched the way his chest rose and fell with each frantic gasp. In one shaky breath the tension eased out of his body and he slumped forward, letting his wet, midnight locks slip over his shoulders to hide the expression on his face.

"Sorry…" Laxus was kicking himself, eating himself alive. He was always getting carried away, always losing himself so easily in the moment whenever Gajeel was involved. He'd never been like this before and the thought suddenly struck him that Gajeel must be something different to him to elicit this type of ferocious lust. It was something he'd never experienced before and if he didn't get it under control, and fast, it would spell the end of what was between them before it could even be something substantial to begin with.

Gajeel looked up at him, ruby eyes suppressing the dread that was still trying to fade, "T's fine… I just… give me a sec."

Laxus didn't move, just watched him calm himself. There was a bitter taste in his mouth as he realized that Gajeel would probably leave after this and he'd carry with him the encounter they'd just had. He didn't want that. He desperately didn't want that. He didn't want any more bad memories. He wanted to somehow turn this into something positive… but how? He only ever seemed good at ruining everything.

He stepped back, breaking Gajeel's hold on him. He was just going to leave but the way Gajeel sank, his hands balling into fists at his side, made his stomach churn with guilt. He did this. Shouldn't he do something to fix it?

Laxus cast his eyes and noticed the soap dispenser. Biting down his own awkwardness, he squeezed the lukewarm substance into his hand and moved back over to the Iron Dragon. Gajeel regarded him coldly once again and Laxus lifted up his free hand in a gesture like surrender. Wordless, he pressed his hands against Gajeel's chest and slipped them across his body, tiny bubbles appearing wherever he touched. He was graceless as he purposefully tried to avoid his eyes trailing to places that might make him uncomfortable and Gajeel took notice, his lip quirking up if with a bit more dejection than mirth.

"I ain't glass," he growled and Laxus felt heat creeping up his neck.

"I always fuck something up," he responded tersely and Gajeel's expression softened slightly.

"It just freaks me out," he breathed as Laxus's hands ghosted across his abs, "If I start feeling like I did…"

"I get it," Laxus murmured, dropping his hands finally, "you don't have to explain. I just…"

He stopped, not sure what to say. Gajeel was looked at him expectantly, waiting to hear him finish even though he wasn't quite sure what he was wanting to explain. He crossed his arms and met his gaze, not wanting to show how unsure he felt. They were so hesitant around each other, tiptoeing and trying not to hurt feelings or cause alarm. He didn't think he could keep up this dance. Something had to break and he was sure he'd be the first. He just didn't know how he was supposed to put into words something he couldn't even understand. He cared but he couldn't show it because Gajeel was still wrestling with demons. He didn't know how long he could keep standing at a distance.

"I'm sorry… I'm bad at this." Laxus tried to smile at him, "I'm learning. You'll have to be patient with me."

Gajeel didn't say anything, just stared at him with a cool, calculated look in his eyes. It unnerved him. Was he doing something wrong again? He set his jaw and stepped forward, reaching purposefully past Laxus to also get some soap. Laxus's heart skipped a beat at the feel of Gajeel's strong hands against his chest, stoking gently down his ribs and stomach. He swallowed hard as Gajeel stepped closer and turned those ruby eyes up at him, daring him to say something as hands wandered down his hips and dipped lower towards his thighs.

"I thought…" Laxus sighed as his blood began to sing in his veins, "…you didn't want to do this…"

Gajeel's hand wrapped around him and he shut his eyes, holding his hands suspended as if he didn't know what to do with them. Gajeel licked his lips as he wrestled with the words in his mind, trying to find the best way to say whatever it was he needed to. Laxus's breathing caught in his throat when Gajeel ran down the length of his dick and suddenly both men were finding it hard not to get lost in the moment.

"When shit happens to me it still triggers," Gajeel's voice was a low growl as he worked him and he kept a steady, almost intimidating eye contact with Laxus as he spoke, "But I can what I want to you just fine."

"Shit…" Laxus felt like lightning had just struck him with just those last few words. Gajeel leaned up and kissed him roughly, the lust from before igniting in both of them. Those red eyes were swimming again and Laxus felt like he could fall into them if he leaned too far into their kiss. Gajeel's teeth ran harshly against his lip and Laxus grunted as his free hand dug nails into his back whilst he pulled him closer. Gajeel released their kiss and Laxus felt as if his breath had been stolen in the process.

"Get closer to me…"

Laxus obeyed and felt Gajeel's member slide against his own. He wrapped his arms around his shoulders and grabbed fistfuls of his hair. He was trembling with every stroke that Gajeel administered and he couldn't help but pull Gajeel into another electrified kiss.

"Can you do us both?" he growled into Gajeel's mouth. He felt his lips turn up wickedly against his own.

"Greedy," was all he managed in return as he released Laxus for just a moment before leaning his hips closer and holding them both in his masterful grip. They were kissing each other as if their lives depended on it. There was no battle for dominance like the few other times Laxus remembered, just unbridled hunger and heat and madness. He could feel Gajeel throbbing against him and it made him want to just fall in his building ecstasy; but he could feel it rising in Gajeel too as his strokes became more frantic and Laxus desperately wanted to cum with him if he could.

When Gajeel broke their kiss this time he pressed his forehead against his chest. Laxus didn't realize he was pulling his locks and Gajeel had no idea he was still slowly raking his nails down the small of Laxus's back. Laxus felt the lightning culminating inside him, was panting into Gajeel's ear as he tried to hang on just a little bit longer…

"Fuck, Gajeel…" he groaned out and he could feel a tattered sigh falling against the flesh of his chest, "Hurry up and cum so I can too."

He thought he heard him whine in desperation; a needy keening noise came from the raven's throat and made Laxus shiver, "Say my name again."

Laxus grinned despite himself and ran his tongue against his studded ear, "Gajeel…" he sighed, playing it up a just a bit, "Gajeel, please…"

That did it. He felt the shock as it shuddered its way down the raven's body and he let loose at the same time. They were both trembling, holding onto each other as they came down from their climax. Gajeel tipped his head back and Laxus quickly found his lips for one last heated kiss before they untangled themselves from each other. Gajeel looked tired and it was all Laxus could do to keep his hands off of him while they both rinsed in the long-cold water. Laxus couldn't help it. When Gajeel had his back turned, he slipped his hands under his arms and wrapped them around his torso. Gajeel didn't become still and defensive like he usually did and Laxus buried his face into his neck.

A playful smile came to his lips and Gajeel tilted his head back in question, "You didn't feel impotent to me."

"You fucking know what I meant," he snapped, but Laxus held him fast. He just wanted to have him close for a moment, appreciate the step forward they had just taken. They could work this out. It wasn't as hopeless as Gajeel, or even Laxus for that matter, had originally thought.

"I know this was hard," he forced the words out, trying to be transparent for once and just let the moment ride for as long as possible, "You didn't have to and I wouldn't have blamed you if you didn't so… thanks… for giving this a shot."

Gajeel was silent for a moment and then nudged him away with his elbow, "Yeah, yeah. I'm tired of the moody shit."

Laxus released him and pulled the curtain back as Gajeel turned off the water. He threw him a towel and the two exited the stall, not too worried about who would see since the place was desolate. As they made their way to their lockers, Laxus noticed that Freed and Bixslow's belongings were still there. Maybe they were still in the public bath? Laxus stayed in his own head while he dressed and he just barely heard Gajeel's voice as he finished speaking.

"Huh? What was that?" he glanced over at him, straightening his running shorts as best he could as they were still damp.

"I said…" Gajeel shot him a glare as if Laxus had misheard him on purpose, "Is the public bath a kink fer you or somethin'? This is the second time."

"If I had a kink at this point I'd say it's more a person than a place," he eyed him pointedly and watched scarlet fight to color his neck. He rolled his eyes as he masterfully hid his fluster.

"Yeah well… can ya try to keep it in yer pants while we're in public?" he grumbled, grabbing his boxers and slipping them on. Laxus watched him dress unabashedly, and just barely made out a thin, fresh scar poking out just from the bottom of his boxers on his inner thigh. He furrowed his brow. Gajeel glanced over at him questioningly as the silence extended and his eyes widened slightly when he noticed Laxus's intense gaze.

"You never let me see your scar," Laxus lifted his eyes to where Gajeel's should be but he wasn't looking at him any longer, "May I?"

"If you must," he replied melodramatically, crossing his arms and lifting his right leg up to rest his foot on the bench, allowing his boxers to rise up. It ran along his inner thigh and vanished farther into his shorts, "Told ya it was ugly."

Laxus clenched his jaw, "What made it?"

Gajeel shook his head, "I'm not really sure. I just remember it hurting like a bitch,"

Laxus rested his hand on his knee, feeling as if his stomach were sinking into his toes, "I should have been there… I knew something was wrong when you didn't come back but I didn't…"

"Shit happens," Gajeel cut him off and tentatively placed his own tanned hand on top of Laxus's pale, "It ain't anyone's fault."

Laxus eased slowly down to his knees and held his leg still. He could see the nervousness in Gajeel's ruby eyes as they darted down either aisle. His comforting hand was not gripping him as he fought to stay his anxiety.

"Laxus…" he hissed, but he didn't listen.

"Where does it end?" he pressed, bringing his free hand to push back the hem of his shorts.

"You'll find out soon enough," he muttered angrily, "Get up."

Laxus disregarded him completely. He'd never been one to just act without thinking but something about Gajeel seemed to steal all his discipline away. He sighed heavily, watching the hair on his leg stand on end as he did so, and pressed his lips against the dark slash. He heard Gajeel's breath catch and turned his eyes up to see him pressing his knuckles to his lips shakily. Without breaking eye contact he kissed the angry scar again, daring to open his mouth and press his sharper teeth against his soft skin. He wanted to follow the line upwards; cover it in kisses and licks and all sorts of different things. He wanted to hide the painful memories with the only way he knew how. He wanted…

"Kiss, kiss, kiss…"

Gajeel was suddenly across the aisle and slammed against the wall of free standing lockers. Laxus fumbled onto his hands, having lost what was holding him up so suddenly. He gritted his teeth as he looked over to see Bixslow standing in all his naked glory, arms crossed with his floating totems surrounding him. His maroon eyes were lit like diamonds and a wide grin was covering his face.

"Bixslow…" Laxus rumbled, fighting to keep his embarrassment hidden, "you could have said something."

"Just be happy I convinced Freed to stay in the bath a few minutes longer," he grinned wickedly, "He'd be pissed."

"Pissed. Pissed."

"Gee, thanks," Gajeel seethed, crossing his arms as if they could somehow hide him entirely.

"You're welcome," he jibed back, completely unperturbed by the Iron Dragon's angry mortification. He walked proudly over to his locker and began changing as if he hadn't just walked into the middle of such an intimate moment between the two and Gajeel wasn't sending daggers his way the entire time.

"So," Bixslow eyed Laxus as he pulled on his pants, "you actually looking for a place to stay or was that just an excuse?"

"I'm actually looking for a place," he sighed, grabbing his shirt and pulling the cool fabric over him. Gajeel had begrudgingly returned to his locker to finish getting dressed, his eyes watching Bixslow's floating babies closely the entire time. He was uncomfortable again and it was clear he was ready to be home. But he was listening intently to the conversation and looked as if he wanted to say something but quickly stole away the thought before he could dare to let it out.

"You just moving in with the Master until you get it figured out?" Bixslow said offhandedly, running his fingers through his hair to try and turn it into some semblance of his usual style, "That'll be a pain."

"Yeah, well, it'll just be temporary. We get sick of each other real fast."

"You could move in with me," Gajeel said the words so quickly that at first Laxus was convinced he hadn't actually heard them. He looked over at him and couldn't stop the smile that played at his lips at the thought, "Lily and I were ready to look for a bigger place anyway."

"Cute! Cute!"

"Bixslow, c'mon, man," Laxus growled.

"I can't help it! My babies speak their minds!"

"What's all the commotion?" Freed's voice reached them before he even turned the corner.

"Tch," Gajeel clicked his teeth and turned on his heel, "I'm over this. Just tell me your decision later."

"Over what? What is he angry about?" Freed was striding towards him, "Gajeel I apologized."

"I ain't mad about that!" he snapped, "Get some damn clothes on!"

"Oh, come now, we're all men. Calm down."

Laxus sat down on the bench and propped his chin on his fist as he watched the two bicker. His grin widened just slightly. Gajeel was willing to live with him? His thoughts were interrupted by Bixslow dropping down beside him, his deep eyes glancing over at him perceptively.

"You've got it bad, bro," he whispered knowingly, "I didn't even see you like this with Mira."

"Bix…" he hushed him, "It's not a big deal."

"Yeah… right," he watched Freed hassle Gajeel for a moment, those piercing eyes staring right through Gajeel the entire time, "But he makes your soul happy."

"He does?" Laxus eyed him steadily. Bixslow just shrugged and pushed himself up, walking over to grip Freed's arm and drag him away from the Iron Dragon. Gajeel muttered something and stomped off towards the exit. He cast his ruby eyes back over his shoulder, though, to check and be sure Laxus was going to be close behind. He smiled at the raven and even in his heart he knew it was genuine. He saw scarlet tinge the tips of his pierced ears but he shot him a half-grin in return before turning out of sight, "So he does…"


	35. Chapter 35

Chapter 35:

Mira's blue eyes sparkled with mischief as she listened at the bar. Laxus was already regretting telling her that he and Gajeel had decided to move in together. They'd even found a nice sized home not too far from the guild. It was two stories with three bedrooms, two upstairs and one down, two bathrooms and a large garage. Neither of them had a car so they decided to turn it into a music room of sorts. Laxus already had plans to hook up large speakers and Gajeel was talking about how he could play his guitar as loud as he wanted. Now all that was left to do was move everything into their new home.

"Poor Lily," she grinned devilishly at him, "Maybe I should offer for him to stay with me while you two christen the new home."

"Mira, stop," he snapped, already fed up with her comments.

"Are you having a house warming party?" she smiled a little more innocently at him.

"Eh? A party?" Laxus cocked an eyebrow at her.

"Did someone say party?" Happy piped and Natsu was close behind his flying friend, a flurry of blue and salmon as they made their way over to Laxus.

Laxus sighed heavily and rested his cheek into his knuckles, already annoyed, "No. We didn't."

"Oh but you have to have a housewarming, party," Mira insisted, that wicked grin creeping back to her features as she raised her voice, "How else will you drive the evil spirits away?"

"There aren't any evil spirits in my house," Laxus hissed, shooting daggers her way as she attracted more attention.

"Evil spirits?" Erza perked up, bringing Cana's eyes with her as she sauntered up the bar, "There are evil spirits in your house, Laxus?"

"No, there aren't," he growled through gritted teeth as Mira smiled sweetly at him.

"But you said yourself the house was empty for over a year and that's why you got such a good price on it," she smirked, happy to have drawn the gaze of everyone in the near vicinity, "Don't you know the legends behind vacant houses?"

"Do tell," Lucy smiled as Happy sank shakily into her arms.

"Cold and dark places draw out evil spirits," Mira's voice took on a haunted edge and Laxus rolled his eyes, "The longer a house lays vacant, the more spirits flock to the cold empty rooms to fill them with their malicious intent…"

"L-L-Laxus is going to a h-haunted house?" Happy shivered fretfully in Lucy's arms.

"That's why you invite guests into your new home, so they can bring their warmth and happiness into the house and scare off the cold and dark. The more people, the warmer the house, and the less room there is for spirits to haunt the halls," Mira finished with a bit of a flair.

"Oh…" Erza's eyes were wide in amazement and she turned her gaze to Laxus, "I would be honored to help drive the evil spirits from your new home."

"As would I!" Natsu chimed in.

"I'll come if there's booze!" Cana laughed heartily.

"I'm not having a housewarming party!" Laxus snapped, causing silence to fill the space finally. Mira crossed her arms and shot him an angry look. He promptly ignored it.

"What's going on over here?" Gajeel's voice brought all of their attentions over and he crossed his arms in response, not comfortable with suddenly having all eyes on him.

"They want us to throw a housewarming party," Laxus muttered and Gajeel raised a studded brow at him.

"Why?"

"It drives away the evil spirits!" Natsu bounded up to Gajeel, sparks flickering off his hands as he did so.

"There ain't any evil spirits in our house," Gajeel's lip quirked up slightly, "Trust me."

"Wait…" Lucy's brow furrowed, "You two are both moving… together?"

Laxus's throat tightened. This was one subject he knew he was going to have a hard time with. Gajeel took it in stride, though.

"Yeah. We both had leases coming up so we thought it'd be cheaper to split rent by three," he grunted.

"Three bachelors in the same house… I bet yer gonna have some crazy parties…" Cana sighed into her bottle, blushing slightly at whatever was going on in her head.

"I thought you guys didn't get along?" Lucy's smile was a little too smug and Laxus was finding it harder to keep his cool. He could kill Mira for it. She knew he hated his business being spread around the guild. They were all gossips when you got down to it.

"Gajeel!" a light voice interrupted the conversation and a pair of arms wrapped around the raven's waist. Gajeel stayed firm, like a brick wall, but Laxus could see the surprise that made his eyes widened just slightly. He still wasn't completely past his uneasiness and when he startled he had a tendency to lash out. He reigned himself in well, though, and quirked up the side of his mouth in a sly smile as Levy danced around him, "You're finally back at the guild!"

"Long time no see, Shorty," he grinned.

"You should have checked in more, we were worried about you," she piped up at him, her blue curls falling down her shoulders as she spoke. Everyone was finally beginning to disperse, muttering to themselves about spirits and houses and the cute way Levy could approach the hulking Iron Mage. Laxus found himself grinding his teeth and turned to the bar, biting down the jealousy that was suddenly flaring up in his stomach.

"Sorry about that," he said coolly, "I was busy training."

Laxus dropped his drink on the bar a little too fiercely and Mira eyed him keenly.

"Really? You'll have to teach me your routine sometime," she smiled up at him.

"Yeah? Think you can keep up, Shrimp?"

"Of course I can!" she chimed confidently and Laxus had to fight down an electric current that threatened to shock the air, "I actually wanted to ask you something."

"Yeah?"

Mira slid him a thicker glass mug and Laxus looked at her quizzically. She waved at him as if nothing were amiss but he felt like that was going to be proven false relatively quickly.

"Would you like to go on a job with me?"

Laxus felt the vein on the side of his neck getting taut and he tried to relax his muscles. It was just a job… and Levy was just being friendly.

"Eh? Sure. Where at?"

"Dahlia," she smiled at him and Laxus felt his possessiveness biting at his insides even harder, "The locals are requesting help with decorating for the Harvest Festival. It's nothing big. They just need some strong arms and a few creative ideas… plus the room is free,"

Laxus glanced over his shoulder at the two. Dahlia was a city known for its fall jubilees this time of year. The people loved to celebrate the harvest and would often host parades and fairs for entire weeks in preparation. It was a sweet and romantic place for couples to go on dates and Laxus found his hand clutching his glass just a little harder at the thought of that.

"Laxus," Mira's soft voice called his attention away from their conversation, "Calm down, love."

"I am calm," he muttered but Mira only rolled her eyes.

"Let him feel wanted," she smiled gently at him, her voice hushed, "It's good for his ego."

"He is wanted," Laxud retorted bitterly in response, refusing to look up at her, "Besides, we need help with the move."

"I'll help you," she smiled genuinely, "It'll be nice for him to come home and have all the hard work done, don't you think? And besides, it'll let me help you prepare for your housewarming."

"I told ya, we don't need a housewarming party," he snapped, although at this point he realized his words were useless.

"Laxus," Gajeel's voice disrupted their argument and he whipped his head around to meet his bloody eyes, "Are you and Lil gonna be ok if I go on a mission for a couple of days?"

 _A couple of days._ He glanced over at Mira who was flitting over to the opposite side of the bar, refusing to meet his gaze.

"Uh… sure," he replied dumbly, sitting up so that their eyes were level with each other, "It's been a while, right? T's probably good for ya."

"Yeah," his lip tugged downwards at the corner, "Probably."

"Hopefully, we'll have everything done by the time you get back. You'll just have to sit through this fucking housewarming party,"

"Mira actually talk you into it?" Gajeel snorted.

"She's agitatingly persuasive," he shot her a glare that she pretended not to notice as she talked happily with Levy and Lucy.

"Well… I've already moved my stuff in anyway," he scratched at the back of his head and Laxus couldn't help but think he seemed nervous, "It' mostly just the living room furniture now."

"You work fast," Laxus muttered and couldn't help the lascivious look that came to his eyes, "Excited?"

He figured Gajeel would probably back down, not wanting to show what they'd been up to behind closed doors. They'd both sort of silently agreed not necessarily to keep their strange, budding relationship to themselves but more just not broadcast it. They had bigger issues between them that needed worked through first. Prying eyes and gossiping mouths didn't need to be added to the mix. Aside from the trauma he was still struggling with daily, Gajeel was also having issues with how his masculinity played into all of this. His pride was just as strong as his iron shield. The first time they got an invasive question could be enough to end it all… or at least that was what Laxus was scared of. So it honestly caught him off guard when Gajeel returned Laxus's lecherous gaze by flicking his own ruby gaze down his chest and pointedly at his crotch and then back up to meet his golden eyes.

"You're not?" he breathed cunningly and Laxus suddenly felt the need to cross his legs. Heat was already creeping up his neck when Gajeel put his hand on his knee as if he needed it to help boost his reach over the counter to grab a bag of iron scraps that Mira kept for him below the counter, "Try not to miss me too much, Sparky,"

He grinned and strode over to Levy who was giggling with Lucy about their mission. Laxus forced out a tense breath and released the strangle-hold he had on his glass, suddenly thankful that Mira had given him a thicker mug since he was sure he would have shattered the other one. He could hear her approaching even though his eyes were still trained on the Iron Dragon who was making his way to the exit Levy in tow. The sound of amber liquid hitting his glass pulled him back from the hot daze he was in.

"I'm impressed…" Mira tutted cheekily, "He's really giving you a run for your money."

He pulled at the collar of his shirt as he took a drink, suddenly realizing how warm he felt and Mira's knowing gaze only made it worse, "He probably gets off on it."

Mira raised a brow at him and the way she dropped her voice made him worried, "Can I ask a personal question?"

"If I say no are you going to ask anyway?" he growled.

She leaned down close to him, "Have you two actually…?"

He shot her a look before she could finish her sentence and hissed at her, "Why the hell do you need to know?"

He didn't like the mischievous turn to her lips, "So I know what to get you as a housewarming gift."

"Then don't get us anything," he bit at her. She sighed.

"I guess I'll just have to ask Juvia… I'm sure she'll know since Gajeel tells her _everything_."

"Or you could respect someone's privacy for once," he couldn't help the snap of electricity that escaped him in his anger.

She feigned a look of disgust as if he'd just insulted her, "I have a reputation to uphold, Laxus Dreyar."

He rolled his eyes and fought through the boiling in his gut, "You're insufferable, Mirajane."

"Harsh…" she pouted but he knew it was a farce. It took a lot more than his mean words to hurt her feelings. Despite the annoyance of her constant prying, he was actually happy they'd been able to stay friends. Mira, in all her grace, didn't even act as if anything was amiss when he'd tromped his way up to the bar a couple of days ago, had been nothing but elated when he'd divulged to her and he and Gajeel had actually been doing well together. It was as if the evening they'd spent using each other had never happened… or maybe that it had helped her finally shed the last of what she felt for him.

Mira swapped places with Lucy at the bar and hung her apron up in the closet. She smoothed out her maroon dress as she met him and they headed together back to Gajeel's house. When he arrived, he was happy to see that most of the place was packed up. It was just moving that was needed, and Lily was already hard at work lifting boxes. It seemed to take no time at all to get everything situated in their new place and Mira waltzed happily through the rooms, impressed that the three men could actually pick out a decent place amongst the three of them.

Lily cheerfully showed her around while Laxus carried his things up the stairs. The hardwood floors creaked and groaned under his weight and the harsh noises seemed to bounce off every hard surface in the house. He and Gajeel had decided to make their homes upstairs and Lily didn't question it in the slightest, preferring an interior room for when the inevitable rainstorm would come by, and it allowed the two men a little privacy. Laxus couldn't find it in him to bring up the prospect of sharing a room and Gajeel didn't seem ready to take a step like that anyway. They were still a walking balancing act; extremely touch-and-go.

He glanced into Gajeel's room as he passed, noticing the bed already set up although not made. He really must have been busy, or excited, or both. There were only a couple of boxes left unpacked and even those were sealed as if what was inside was meant to stay that way. He didn't want to intrude on the Iron Mage's privacy so he left it all be and just headed for his own room. It was the larger of the two upstairs, mostly because Laxus had the larger bed, and it smelled like dust and mothballs. He didn't mind it though. It would smell like him soon enough.

The next couple of trips up and down the stairs slowly saw the living room and kitchen put together as Mira and Lily got to unpacking. He was left alone for the most part to get his own room in order and he took the time alone graciously, realizing that he'd been living alone for the past couple of years and the transition to a full house was probably going to be a rocky one. He'd found himself wondering if maybe this step was one that they'd taken a little too quickly. What would happen if they fell apart? And then they'd just be stuck in the same house together?

He tried to push the thought out of his mind as he worked, opening a box and emptying it once, twice, again and again. He never realized just how much useless stuff he had until he had to put it all away and tear it back out again. He was starting more and more to like the idea of the next time he moved just leaving everything and starting fresh. Taking items with you was just an added hassle. Gajeel seemed to be the opposite sort of person. Whereas Laxus had thrown things away, he had carefully changed places with almost everything he'd previously had. The move had sparked a bit of a cleanup, throwing away old and broken trinkets or making him rummage through junk he hadn't touched in ages, but for the most part he'd seamlessly moved his room from one house to another with little change.

He held onto things and Laxus just pushed them away. Maybe he should have expected that given their dispositions. Gajeel carried his thoughts and feelings with him, harboring them and letting them bottle up. Laxus made himself forget, pushed them away until he could find some other way to deal with them. He sort of wondered if that was why he hadn't spiraled out of control the same way Gajeel had despite everything that had happened. He focused on moving forward and ridding himself of the bad and Gajeel felt like he was trapped by it.

Hours passed and it was dark in the house when Mira finally came up the stairs to tell him that she was leaving. The electricity hadn't been turned on yet so they'd lit candles and a couple of lamps that Laxus had collected in case of emergency. Lily decided to stay with Mira since they'd already closed up their house as well and the prospect of a hot shower had enticed him away from the dreary place they were still trying to make a home. They said their goodnights and Laxus closed the door, sort of feeling trapped in the massive place. His old house had been small, just a single bedroom, and he'd become used to its creeks and settling. This place was new and still fairly empty and dark. He'd be awoken by any slight noise during the night, he was sure of it.

He sighed to himself and grabbed a lantern, turning to walk up the dank stairwell. Each door now seemed like an open maw as he walked up to them, only vanishing when the light tilted in and revealed what was inside. Shapes of boxes were in one room. Another held the bathroom when the light finally reached past the shadows. He wasn't as on edge as he thought he would be. It was just an empty house, after all, and he'd never really been much of a believer in spirits from the netherworld coming back to haunt places.

He went to pass Gajeel's room again, casting his eyes to the shadows just to ensure nothing was out of place. An open box caught his eye and he stopped still in the hall. He was fairly certain they'd all been closed when he'd last walked by, but it was possible he'd just missed it in his haste to get full boxes up the stairs and empty ones in the trash. He just sort of stood in that hall for a moment, watching the open box as if at any moment the flaps would collapse back in on themselves and it would close of its own volition. Or, to him a worse alternative, literally every other box in the room may spontaneously open.

"There are no spirits in my house," he muttered aloud to himself and the darkness. He stepped into the dark room with his lantern and took a casual look around. All was still and silent. He let out a sigh, kicking himself for getting worked up over a box. He glanced over at it again and caught a glimpse of some white, "He'll kill you if he finds out you were snooping…"

He tromped over and peered inside and furrowed his brow at what was inside. In several different pieces of splintered wood and severed cord, was Gajeel's guitar. It clearly hadn't just been dropped or damaged in the shuffle of the move, it had been purposefully smashed to bits. Now that he thought about it, Gajeel hadn't made any mention of playing recently. He'd not performed at the guild or in the streets or even at home. Laxus hadn't seen the instrument lying about and had for the most part sort of forgotten that Gajeel even played except for when he brought it up in conversation.

A kind of sadness befell him as he looked at the broken pieces. He sighed and picked up the box, wincing as the broken thing shuffled painfully with the movement, and carried it back to his room. Early the next morning, he set out with it into town and made his way to one of the few, small music stores in the area. The bell dinged cheerfully as he entered and the cashier didn't seem happy at all to have a customer so early in the morning, especially not one with a box full of broken guitar parts.

" _What_ did you _do_ to it?" he whined, his voice practically coming out his nose as he gingerly pulled what remained of a once white rock guitar out onto the counter.

"I didn't do anything," he crossed his arms.

"You don't expect me to fix this, do you?" the kid held his hands over it, not even daring to touch the splintered wood.

"Not anymore," Laxus watched him as he fussed, "Do you have anything like it?"

"Like this?" he looked Laxus up and down as he spoke, "No. But we can order one similar. I can have it at the shop in two weeks."

"Two weeks?"

"Two weeks."

"You can't get it here any faster?"

"How soon do you want it?"

"Today."

The kid snorted obnoxiously, clearly trying to hold back laughter, "Listen… buddy… I'd love to, but I'm not magic. Guitars like this went out of style ages ago. You gotta have one of these custom made. I can try to push it to one week but that's the best I can do, and it's going to cost ya."

Laxus stared at it for a hard minute, "Fine. Put the order in. But I want it in a week."

The kid blinked, "It'll raise the price, my guy… by like, five thousand jewels."

Laxus cocked an eyebrow at him and the kid suddenly seemed much more eager to help him than before, "I'll go get the order form. Make yourself at home!"

Laxus let out an agitated sigh and glanced around the shop. There were several different partitions up with instruments mounted to them. All sorts of glittering brass and shining silver decorated the walls. Saxophones, flutes, clarinets, violins, keyboards and so much more decorated the place like some kind of museum of music. He stepped around the counter and made his way deeper through the shelves. There was an area with all sorts of different music books, from teaching basics to whole soundtracks. He'd never really learned how to read music himself, he just knew he liked to listen to it.

He turned the bend and stopped in his tracks. The back of the store was just an entire wall of guitars only broken by a simple door which Laxus assumed led to a store room. And right in front of him was an ivory-colored electric guitar in just the style and shape as Gajeel's old one. He was immediately agitated. Two weeks and he had one back here the entire time? He reached up and lifted it easily. It was heavier than he thought it would be and was speckled with iridescent flecks on the white surface. He smirked. It wasn't just like Gajeel's old guitar, it was somehow even gaudier.

"H-Hey! Put that back!" the kid scrambled over to him from seemingly nowhere and Laxus shot him an exasperated glare as he sidestepped his nervous attempts at snatching the guitar from him, "That's worth more than half the pieces in this place!"

"It is?" he smirked, "This thing?"

"Yes, _this thing_!" he flushed red and made one last futile attempt to get it away from the Lightning Mage, "It's a limited edition!"

"How much?" he snapped, causing the boy to stare up at him in alarm.

"What? You want to _buy_ it?"

"Listen, kid," he growled and the boy shuddered back a step, "I'm tryin' to do somethin' nice for a friend. He needs a new guitar and I want it before he gets back in town. How much is the damn thing?"

His eyes widened, "I… uh… it's ninety…"

"Great," he said sarcastically, "Ring it up."

"Y-yes, yes, right away."

Laxus let his eyes wander once again to the wall and let another guitar catch his attention, "I want that one, too,"

The kid froze, " _That_ one?"


	36. Chapter 36

Chapter 36:

"All done!" Mira exclaimed, putting up the last of the decorations in the backyard. Laxus dusted his hands on his pants and glanced over at her, tired but actually pretty happy with everything they'd done. The whole house had finally been put together, aside from what was left for Gajeel in his room, and Mira had brought over chairs for their guests. Lily and Gajeel had a grill and Lily was already setting to work with getting food prepared and the sun's light was finally starting to sink into the west, bringing with it the autumn chill.

"You've outdone yourself, Mira," he grinned at her, walking over to get the fire started. She'd hung up lights around the yard. Set up tables and chairs and even made a sort of makeshift bar. She'd stowed away a few bottles from the guild earlier that day and Lily had picked up enough beer to probably make the whole guild drunk.

"Of course," she smiled back at him, flipping her silver hair over her shoulder, "When does Gajeel get home?"

"Dunno," he sighed, untucking his shirt from his waistband and realizing just how gross he was from the day's work, "Should be soon I'd imagine… Do you need any help? If not I'm going to change."

"I think we're fine," she waved her hands at him as if to shoo him away, "Go make yourself look nice for your man."

Laxus clicked his teeth at her and she just smiled at him. Suddenly, realization hit her face and she jumped over the bar. Laxus startled as she dashed past him into the house.

"O-oi..!" he glanced at Lily, "What happened?"

Lily shrugged but he heard Mira's footsteps quickly approaching once again. He glanced into the house and saw she was carrying a large bag in her hands. She held it out for him, clearly pleased with herself.

"Your housewarming gift!" she grinned and Laxus smirked at her.

"I told ya you didn't have to get me anything," he went to take a peek when he noticed the mischievous look on her face and his smile quickly disappeared, "What is it?"

"It's nothing bad!" she crossed her arms but her impish smile persisted, "It just might be more for Gajeel than you,"

He just barely caught the stifled snickers of Lily as he passed her and couldn't stop himself as he rolled his eyes. Morbid curiosity nagged him as he held the bag in his grasp. He took the stairs by twos and slunk back into his room, shutting the door until he heard the quiet _click_ of the latch. He carefully peeled back the tissue paper and pulled it out, the smell of leather hitting him immediately. He cocked an eyebrow at the thing.

It was a leather jacket, obviously expensive, and lined with fur around the collar. He looked pointedly at the sleeves, wondering if his arms would be too long. He sighed and threw it onto his bed, turning to his closet and peeling off his clothes from that day. Even though it wasn't hot during the day any longer, his clothes were still damp around the small of his back from sweat. He glanced over at the jacket one more time and then back to his closet. He knew he shouldn't encourage Mira but he still grabbed a scarlet v-neck from the back and pulled it on, telling himself it was just because the fabric was soft and smooth and he was wanting comfort over his usual dress since he'd been working all day.

It was a little tight but he didn't mind and he glared down the jacket for a long while before he tromped over to it, wrinkling his nose at it. He'd never been one for leather. Even before his keener sense of smell he'd thought it stank and just wasn't his style. He felt like it made him seem like he was trying too hard to look cool. All he was missing was a pair of sunglasses and a motorcycle. He lifted it. It was heavy, heavier than his long coat. Metal buttons glistened up at him like jeering eyes, laughing at him as he turned to his mirror and forced his arms into it. He straightened his shoulders and put his hands on his hips, flaring it out around his waist.

He wrinkled his nose again.

It didn't lay how his other jacket did. The solid material almost moved as its own unit, not falling to frame him like he was used to. He stretched his arms forward, sure that the sleeves would rise all the way up to his elbows but was surprised when they only hugged his wrists. There were straps on the sides of his wrist with more large metallic buttons keeping them down. He unsnapped them and let them hang, re-snapped them, and decided he honestly didn't care for them since they didn't seem to have a purpose anyway. He stuffed his hands into the jacket's large pockets and blinked when he felt something. It was plastic and he groaned internally, immediately realizing what they were.

He glared down at the condoms in his hand as if he'd never been so insulted in his life, "Miraaa…" he growled and walked over to his drawer and threw the in indignantly, "Insufferable fucking demon woman…"

He sighed and straightened, glancing once again at his image in the mirror. He stuffed his hand into his pocket and glared at his reflection. The more he stared at it, though, the less it agitated him. Actually, the furred collar was pretty cool. He squared himself at the mirror and took a wide stance, straightening his spine and tipping his head back. What was that smile that Gajeel always flashed? The one that showed his sharp teeth and made him look like a demon enticing you to sin? Just the thought made the corner of his lip tug upwards and he ran his fingers through his blonde spikes.

 _More of a gift for Gajeel…_

Laxus felt his heart make a misstep. Was he supposed to be _sexy_? Did he even know how to be sexy? He'd been called a pretty boy before, which he never really understood given the scar that marred his face. He'd posed for Sorcerer Magazine a couple of times when they'd showcased different wizards from the guild. That guy had told him all sorts of stupid shit to try and get him in the mood to pose. He could barely remember what he'd been made to do now. He stared at himself hard for a moment, trying to think of shit he'd seen on book covers, magazines, anything really.

He could undo the button on his jeans. Guys did that to look sexy, didn't they? He cringed internally at the idea. This was stupid. Was Gajeel even turned on by that shit? He let out an exasperated sigh, his mind travelling back to an encounter that seemed like ages ago now, the only time he'd ever actually gotten a glimpse into what Gajeel was into. Back in the woods, when it was just the two of them, and Gajeel was enticing him to lose control and then threatening to make him; he's said he liked the look on his face when he'd been forced down. The way he'd run his clawed fingers across his flesh made just the memory send a shiver down his spine.

He leaned back on his heels, pulled up his red shirt over the lip of his jeans just as his heart started to pound a little harder. He'd been fearsome with glittering silver scales in the dim light under the trees. He let out a tight breath, trying to calm down. The tension in his jeans was getting harder to deal with as he pictured what those ruby eyes would look like glaring up at him from his own bed. A whisper of his intoxicating scent would fill the air and make Laxus go wild. He wanted to feel those nails again, running up his back as he tried to reign himself in. He wanted to watch him when he finally lost his inhibitions… He wanted to do such lewd things to the wicked man, things that he knew he shouldn't, things he'd never had a particular interest in before...

A shock went through him when he heard Gajeel's familiar voice reaching up the stairs. He quietly cursed himself, staring at the obvious results of his wandering mind. He bit the inside of his cheek thinking about how Gajeel would probably smell it when he came down, would probably shoot him that look that said he knew exactly what Laxus had been up to alone in his room but was too good of a guy to call him out for it. He heard the bubbling laughter of Levy and Cana… how many people had come into his house while he'd been deep in his own thoughts?

He adjusted himself and headed for the door, slipping silently into the hall and walking to the railing of the stairs to lean on it and watch who was in his living room. Gajeel had his pack slung over his shoulder still, wearing his sleeveless studded tunic and tanned pants tucked into black boots. As if feeling Laxus's golden gaze, Gajeel glanced over his shoulder. His ruby eyes widened, a slick grin tugged at his lips. He glanced over to Levy who was chattering away with Cana, not paying any attention to the Iron Mage at her side. When his eyes turned back up to the blonde, Laxus knew exactly what they were beckoning him to do. His boner suddenly came back with much more vigor than before as he watched Gajeel run his tongue against his canines hungrily.

A turn in the conversation caught his attention so he immediately stopped his teasing and turned his eyes back to the two girls, muttering something and motioning for the stairs. Levy waved at him and she with Cana headed for the back yard. Watched them for a moment before turning and heading for Laxus, that ravenous look in his eyes again as he raked his eyes up and down the blonde. Laxus smirked at him.

"Welcome home," he purred as Gajeel got to the top of the stairs.

"Thanks," the raven dropped his back at the landing and crossed his arms, "Where the hell did you get that?"

"It was a gift," he replied simply and feigned a tired look, "But I've never really liked leather so… I might give it back."

Gajeel stepped up to him and put his gloved hand on hem of his jacket, slowly travelling up to grip the furred collar, "Shame…" he could see the heat creeping up Gajeel's neck, "Looks good on ya."

Laxus leaned a bit closer to him, "I'll think about it then,"

"We should probably get outside," Gajeel muttered and retrieved his things from the landing to put them into his room before joining the others. Laxus followed after him and lounged in the doorway as he waited. Gajeel unpacked quickly, having only taken a few things since it had been a short trip.

"How was the mission, by the way?"

"It was fine," Gajeel seemed tense and his voice had an edge to it, "I think I was only invited to piss off Jet, though."

Laxus raised an eyebrow, "What makes you say that?"

"Just a hunch," he grumbled, but Laxus could tell it had soured his mood. He studied him for a moment. He sighed and put his hands on his hips as if getting himself ready for being around their company. He headed for the door where Laxus still lounged but when he walked up to him he made no motion to leave his post, "What?"

Laxus leaned down just slightly so they were seeing eye-to-eye and didn't even attempt to hide the mischief on his face, "I was just thinking I haven't welcomed you properly, yet."

Gajeel gihi-ed and matched his smirk, "A punishable offense."

Gajeel rose up to meet him. He was more agitated than he let on. Laxus could feel it in the way his lips pressed against his angrily. His hands were grabbing hold of his jacket and pulling him closer and Laxus let his hands rest on his hips, held him so their pelvises were flush with each other. Gajeel's tongue was hot in his mouth and their teeth bumped each other, making Laxus wince. His hard-on was throbbing, begging for some sort of action after being provoked so many times. Gajeel was grinding against him slightly as they both came up for air, eyes swimming with his frustration.

Laxus brushed his lip with his knuckle from where their teeth had hit, still feeling the impact in his gums. Gajeel let him go, "Sorry about that."

"T's fine," he murmured, trying to lighten his mood, "I already knew you were a biter."

Gajeel rolled his eyes but seemed to be in better spirits, "You ain't seen shit,"

"Is that a threat or a promise?" Laxus let him through and Gajeel sidestepped him with the same pretentious air as a cat that had just recovered from a graceless landing.

"Who knows," he sighed under his breath and for a moment Laxus wondered if he'd done something to upset him again. He brushed it off, making a note to ask him about it later, and followed the raven downstairs.

There were a _lot_ of people in their backyard. All of Team Natsu, Team Shadow Gear, the rest of the Thunder God Tribe, Elfman and Lisanna, Cana, Wendy and Charla… even Gramps. Laxus had never been one for parties and their yard was much smaller than the guildhall. If a fight broke out, Laxus was sure their whole house would be torn up in the process.

"There you guys are!" Mira waved them over, two drinks in her hands, "I was wondering where you'd run off to."

Juvia was smiling beside her, wearing a light blue sundress despite the chillier weather, "Juvia likes your home. Juvia can tell Laxus and Lily have worked hard putting everything together."

"Mira helped," Lily piped from the grill, putting burgers and hot dogs on a place and bringing them over to the table.

Wendy bounced up, her blue ponytails swishing with each step as she sidled up to Gajeel, "Charla and I put our gifts on the table. We hope you like them."

Gajeel ruffled her hair, "Ya didn't have to bring nothin'."

"It's not much," she stammered nervously.

"Yo! Is the food ready yet?" Natsu yelled from where he stood on one of their tables.

"Natsu! That's rude!" Lucy hissed at him, grabbing his leg in an attempt to pull him down.

"Yeah, Flame-Brain. Get down!"

"Who'd you call Flame-Brain, Squinty?!"

Erza grabbed them both and dragged them to the ground, "YOU'RE IN SOMEONE ELSE'S HOME. BE POLITE."

"Yes ma'am!" they squeaked in unison, desperately trying to calm the redhead.

Laxus rolled his eyes, already annoyed with the raucous. Levy sashayed up to them, her skirt flaring with each step. Laxus crossed his arms and bit the inside of his cheek, trying to settle the sudden spike in his blood. She was clearly hitting on him and it made him increasingly more jealous whenever she was around. She spent two days with him… hadn't she had enough? He glanced over at where Jet sat with Droy, muttering angrily about something while Droy was digging in to a plate of food and not paying him much attention. He desperately wanted to say something about Levy going back to her angry boyfriend, but that was unbelievably petty and that wasn't the type of guy he was… but it didn't stop him from entertaining the idea.

"Laxus, _you_ put all this together?" Levy smiled up at him, her large brown eyes making some of his anger abate. There was no way she could be that malicious, "I never knew you to be such a homemaker,"

"I had help," was all he could force out, not happy with her tone of voice.

"Well of course," she stammered nervously, "I just meant that you did a good job."

"Hey man!" and arm wrapped around his shoulders, "Nice place. Even Freed is impressed,"

"Good job! Good job!"

"Bix," Laxus shook him off but the navy-haired man seemed unaffected. He was almost two inches taller than Laxus so he had no trouble keeping his hold even on the hulking Thunder Mage.

"I'm trying to convince Freed to let us hang out here instead of his place," he grinned, his maroon eyes cutting over to where Freed and Evergreen sat, the former clearly sulking.

"Gaudy! Gaudy!"

"My house is not gaudy! You have no taste!" Freed seethed and Evergreen rolled her eyes, clearly not caring about her partner's pride in the slightest. Laxus grinned over at his friends and let the tension fall off of his shoulders. Everyone else had settled into a calm hum as they talked and ate. Bixslow finally left him, giving him a knowing look as he walked away, and Laxus kicked himself internally. Of course he'd seen Laxus getting angry, but Laxus sort of appreciated the fact that he'd come over to diffuse the situation before he'd get so mad he'd make a scene.

But that didn't mean the way Levy kept flirting didn't make his blood spike all over again. He stepped away from them, deciding it would probably just be best to remove himself from the situation altogether, and headed over to where his grandfather was sitting talking to Mirajane and Lisanna. He seemed happy enough and Laxus thought for a moment that he may actually get some approval from the imp of a man.

"Hey Gramps," Laxus stood in front of him and crossed his arms. Makarov grinned up at him.

"What a nice house," he seemed genuine and it was a relief to Laxus, "Although, I was thinking that the next time you'd move it would be with Mira."

Mira smiled and laughed as if the entire idea was silly, "We're not even dating, Master,"

"I know, I know. You two are always on and off," he huffed, "But if Laxus were to finally get serious…"

Laxus stood there quietly, not wanting to say anything to ruin his mood. He and Laxus were always tense no matter what he did. Even though he was back at the guild, he'd damaged their relationship terribly. Gramps had forgiven him, there was no doubt about that, but they always seemed to piss each other off in one way or another. Maybe their personalities just weren't compatible any longer or maybe time would change things… Laxus didn't really like to think about it.

"You don't understand," Mira's sweet voice broke through his thoughts and for a moment, Laxus felt like his heart had stopped, "Laxus and I aren't ever going to be serious…"

She wasn't going to mention anything about him and Gajeel, was she? His eyes widened slightly at her but she paid him no attention. It wasn't really a secret but he didn't want to break the news to Gramps just yet, not until they were certain their relationship was actually going to turn into something. And he was honestly worried about the old man's reaction. What if he didn't approve? It could be the final nail in their proverbial coffin, ending their fragile relationship entirely and he wasn't ready for that.

"I don't have feelings for Laxus," she smiled and Makarov seemed genuinely surprised. Laxus let out a tightly held breath, "He's like my older brother."

"But… but you two dated…"

"Some things you just have to figure out over time," she smiled, "But we'll still be friends."

"Ahhh… I guess it can't be helped," Makarov seemed dejected, as if it had been him who was dumped.

"You shouldn't play matchmaker, Gramps. It makes you seem like even more of a pervert than you already are."

"I'm trying to get you to settle down, you brat! You're going to be the death of me!"

Laxus smiled and Makarov grinned back at him, chuckling slightly.

"Well, I think I'm going to head out. You kids don't need an old man here to spoil your fun."

"Oh yeah, Gramps, we're just waiting to break out spin the bottle," he rolled his eyes but it had him laughing which made Laxus even more at ease, "Do you need someone to walk you home?"

"I will," Lisanna smiled, "I don't mind. I wanted to go home early anyway."

"Lisanna…" Mira chided but Laxus just shrugged it off. He didn't mind. When the two had left, she turned her attention back to the Thunder Mage, "I'm hurt by you Laxus."

"Eh?"

"I saw the way you looked at me. You thought I was just going to out you like that?" she pouted, crossing her arms and glaring at him, "What kind of a person do you think I am?"

He smirked, "I mean… you can't keep a secret."

"Coming out of the closet it a bit more than just a secret," she hissed quietly but quickly swallowed her anger, "When are you going to give Gajeel his gifts?"

"You think I should?" he glanced over to where the Iron Mage was still talking to Levy. Could she have been more open? She had a drink in her hand at this point and a faint blush was coloring her cheeks. Laxus didn't like the way Gajeel was looking at her, giving her all of his attention. He could at least pretend to be bored.

"Oh, I _definitely_ think you should," she shoved him playfully, "Go on. I'll keep everyone entertained."

Laxus shuffled up to his room once again, this time pulling out a couple of large cases out from where he'd hidden them in his closet. He couldn't help the dread gathering in his stomach as he thought of how flashy this was about to be. He tried to squash it, though, and instead of bringing with him both of the guitars he'd gotten he opted for just the white electric guitar to replace Gajeel's broken one. Maybe he'd give him the other one when they were together alone and not so many eyes were focused on them.

When he emerged from the house his eyes immediately fell on the raven who was somehow _still_ talking to Levy, although his expression was far less invested than before. Cana was making a jibe about them liking each other and Levy's face turned bright red, denying the thought entirely even though it was completely obvious that at least on her end it wasn't true . Gajeel's jaw clenched but he bit his way through it, making a snide comment about Cana's drinking habits making her see things that weren't actually there. Laxus was envious of his finesse. He was much more tactful than everyone else gave him credit for. Maybe it was just Natsu who brought out the brutishness in him.

"Oi," Laxus called over to him and Gajeel glanced back at him casually before doing a double-take. Laxus felt heat creeping up his neck as he brought the guitar case off his shoulder to hand it to the Iron Dragon, "I noticed yours was a little busted up… I was going to give this to ya later but I thought the others might like some entertainment."

"Shit… eh…" he handled it almost nervously and set the thing down carefully on the ground, "Thanks, Laxus."

He flipped the case open and slowly his face began to light up more and more as he took it in. He gripped the white body and the neck, hefting it like some sort of delicate weapon in his hands as he stood. His eyes were lit up like a child's, a look of honest excitement on his features. Laxus had to check himself, keep the bubbling feeling of pride down. Gajeel was already putting the strap over his shoulder and starting to tune the cords.

"It's not exactly like your old one," Laxus was trying to contain himself. He was incredibly happy that Gajeel liked it, "If it's not something you like, we can take it back to the shop and get a different one…"

"No, no," he was grinning, already strumming a few muted cords as he tested the sound, "This is great. I've been wanting to play… I need my amp…"

Mira was on it. She'd already set up a little area for him to play while they had done the exchange and motioned him over. He almost ran over to plug it in and as soon as he turned the dial he was filling the air with broken chords and pentatonic scales. He played for a while uninterrupted as he warmed up and Laxus couldn't help but smile as he watched. His mood soured slightly, however, when a voice called out from one of the tables.

"You should play a love song!" Lucy giggled, nudging Levy as the girl turned bright red.

"Make sure it's sexy!" Cana chimed in, waving her bottle in the air. He heard Jet scoff from where he sat with Droy and it irked him. He grabbed some food and took a seat at a table by himself, not caring to listen to the rest of them squabble over what Gajeel needed to play. Gajeel didn't seem to mind. He just started tuning his guitar and strumming out a melody. It was mild and jazzy compared to his warm up and it permeated the air like the scent of burning fire, melting Laxus where he sat.

 _"_ _Lightning struck me once,_

 _I remember the feeling of thunder_

 _The roar of God's wrath_

 _Pulling me under_

 _Lightning struck me once,_

 _I thought I was a goner_

 _But in the end, I wished_

 _Lightning would strike me twice."_

As he started singing, Laxus realized that he could listen to him all night. His voice was raspy and deep and filled the evening air with its dark velvet. He took a sip of his drink and just watching him, thinking the look on his face as he sang was almost criminal. He felt a licentious heat beginning to rise in his chest.

 _"_ _I thought that I had saved you_

 _When you bared your parts to me_

 _But in truth you were the one_

 _Who came to rescue me,_

 _And oh, the night did rumble_

 _With the storm our love could bring_

 _As skies roared with thunder_

 _My sin poured out like water…"_

Gajeel hadn't looked up as he sang, just kept his eyes on his hands as if he needed to be sure he played the chords right. But in a quick, deliberate flicker his ruby eyes flashed up to him and them immediately back down again. Laxus thought he might just lose it. The hairs on his arms were standing on end, chills were shimmying their way up to the back of his neck and burst down his spine. He tugged the jacket around himself as he stifled his shiver, pretending it was the night's bite that was making him quake on the inside even though he felt like his veins were on fire.

 _"_ _Lightning struck me once_

 _Back when I didn't know_

 _That touch I don't deserve_

 _I want to bring you down from heaven_

 _Make your body roll with thunder_

 _And love you 'til you can't go back_

 _Yeah, in the end I wish_

 _Lightning would strike me twice."_

A light applause brought Laxus crashing back down to reality and he blinked a couple of times to center himself. He carefully picked up his cup, suddenly very aware of the desire once again rearing itself angrily up through his body. He dumped his still full plate into the trash and made his way into the house, getting reprieve from his roaring emotions away from his raucous guildmates and Gajeel's sultry voice. He slipped into the bathroom and turned on cold water, rinsing his hands and cupping some to rub on his throat and the back of his neck, trying to cool off. He took a few breaths and steadied himself on the sink, just watching his reflection in the mirror.

When he'd finally gotten a hold of himself, he opened the door to face the people in his backyard. He froze as he almost stepped right into Evergreen, arms crossed as she looked him up and down.

"Shit."

She grinned and pushed him back into the bathroom, shutting the door firmly behind her, "Spill it."

"Spill what?" he lied smoothly even though it was far too late. She raised an eyebrow as if she couldn't actually believe he'd try something so simple. He sighed, "Ok… I've known about you and Elfman for a while now."

Blush suddenly turned her entire face red and he could see an indignant gleam in her eyes, "I… this… this isn't about _me_ ," she hissed, "This is about _you_."

"Me? I don't understand," he tried to stay stone-faced but she was clearly not having it.

"Stop playing dumb. I saw the way you were watching him. Spill it. You like him, don't you?"

"I mean… he's a good fighter and loyal to the guild. He seems like an ok guy, I guess…"

"Laxus," she rubbed her face and took off her glasses, exasperated, "You know what I mean. Why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't tell Freed or Bix, either."

A wicked smile curled up her face and she chuckled viciously, "I should tell Freed. His reaction will be hilarious…"

"Ever…"

She studied him for a moment before letting out a sigh, "Does this mean you're breaking up the Thunder God Tribe?"

"Eh? Why would I do that?" he blinked down at her, honestly confused.

She turned red again, "B-because… if your lover doesn't like us he might ask you not to be around us anymore."

"My _lover_ doesn't give a shit about the Thunder God Tribe… even when Bixslow and Freed cornered him in the onsen."

"Oh no."

"Yeah."

"And they didn't scare him away?"

"Surprisingly, no," he snickered despite himself and she smiled up at him, her fears abated for the time being.

"When are you planning on telling everyone?" her brows furrowed and she crossed her arms.

"I'm not sure. We're trying to take things slow."

She glanced at him from the corner of her eyes and fanned herself slightly, "I'd say moving in together isn't very slow."

"It's complicated."

"So complicated you're keeping it a secret?" she eyed him warily and he brushed her off.

"Evergreen… just leave it alone. You're as bad as Mira."

"Mira…" she clucked her tongue. She's never really approved of his and Mira's relationship in the past. She thought Mira was manipulative and somewhat two-faced, and she wasn't completely wrong. There were many times when Mira's demon side had gotten the better of her during their relationship. But Laxus hadn't been a saint either. For the most part Evergreen just never thought they were good for each other and was always overly pleased when she found out they'd broken up again, "How's she taking it?"

"With grace," was all he replied and she rolled her eyes, "Are you done interrogating me? You know our guildmates. Any longer and they'll start thinking _we're_ together."

"They wouldn't be that foolish," she tutted and turned to open the door, seemingly dropping the conversation. He sighed and followed her out of the small room.


	37. Chapter 37

Chapter 37:

Entering the backyard found them amongst half-drunk comrades wrapping up to go home. Erza was swaying slightly with Cana, muttering about some guy she couldn't see with blue hair. Juvia was hanging on Grey's arm as he tried to escape to go home and Lucy was carrying Happy and pulling along a fired-up Natsu. Bixslow and Freed were laughing about something as Bix downed the rest of his drink. Elfman was chatting with Mira and immediately perked up when Evergreen walked out, although he made no move to walk up to her. The man's man was probably also as averse to the gossip as Gajeel was… or maybe it was Evergreen that had set the standard for his silence, he wasn't entirely sure. As he glanced around, he couldn't find Wendy or Charla and immediately assumed they'd already headed out. Jet and Droy were still sitting amongst themselves and it was clear Jet probably had one to many.

Laxus blinked, an angry feeling suddenly making his heart pound a little harder. Where was Gajeel and Levy?

"Gajeel~!" Levy's voice drew his attention over to where he was winding up his cord, attempting to put away his amp before the grass got damp and ruined the speakers, "Why don't you walk me home?"

He clenched his jaw. Her face was scarlet from drink and her words slurred. She was leaning over the table, holding her cheek in her hand as she watched him work. Laxus narrowed his eyes at her, trying to kill the jealousy he felt he had no right to claim. The strap of her dress was falling down her shoulder and she was clearly trying to entice him. The more he watched the angrier he got.

His voice sounded gruff in response, "Shouldn't ya be askin' yer boyfriend, Lev?"

"I don't have a boyfriend," she muttered, looking up at him through her eyelashes, "so if you don't walk me home I'll be walking _alone_."

"Yeah?" he threw the guitar over his shoulder and grabbed the rest of his things, heading for the back door to stow them in the garage, "What about Droy, then?"

"But Gajeel I want _you_ to walk me home," she skipped over to him and wrapped her arms around his waist. He looked down at her, not struggling in the least with his load despite her added weight. It was comical their size difference. She almost came up to his chest and was all giggly smiles compared to his usual cool glare, like an angry wolf being cuddled by a Pomeranian. He broke easily through her hold as he disappeared into the garage and she pouted while she waited, teetering slightly where she stood. When he reemerged she lit up again, brown eyes sparkling up at him and Laxus saw the words on his lips before he even said them.

"Alright Shorty, let's get you home," he combed his fingers through his hair as she bounced happily around him, elated with having her way. Laxus felt like a growl was going to slip past his lips and he was desperately trying to keep it subdued. He narrowed his eyes at the pair and for a brief moment contemplated just walking over, pulling Gajeel close, and…

"Yo! Laxus!" Bixslow's voice cut into his thoughts and he glanced over to see him waiving, his babies floating cheerfully above Freed's head where it was nestled into the crook of his arm, clearly not holding his liquor well, "Give me a hand with this guy!"

"Heavy, heavy!"

"I'm not heavy!" Freed slurred, batting at the totems pitifully, "And I don't need help! I just… give me a minute."

Laxus stole one more glance in at the annoying bluenette before biting down his frustration and heading for Bixslow. His maroon eyes were grinning and his smirk said he knew exactly what Laxus was thinking and was happy he'd actually gotten him to come over.

"Help me carry this guy home," he smiled as wide as a Cheshire cat as he spoke, "I don't think I can do it myself."

"Are you serious?" Laxus scoffed.

"Laxus," he gave him a some-what genuine look, "You're so much stronger than I am… and he needs to go back on his vegetarian diet."

"I'm not heavy!" Freed whipped his head up but in doing so made himself dizzy. He almost fell backwards but Bixslow's totems rushed in to keep him straight. They cackled and Laxus rolled his eyes.

"Freed… I thought we decided you didn't drink," Laxus growled, pulling back his seat so that they faced each other. Freed teetered and opened his mouth to say something but immediately closed it as blush made his face flush crimson. Laxus squatted down with his back to him, gripped his knees, and hoisted the thin man onto his back. Freed squeaked and wrapped his arms around his shoulders. He could feel his thick belt pressing into his back as he straightened.

"Woah…" Bixslow raised his brows, "Told ya you were stronger than me."

"So strong, so strong!"

"Yeah, yeah,"

"L-Laxus… put me down! I… I can walk…!" Freed was gripping his shoulders so hard he was shaking.

"Like hell you can," he growled in response, "Yer house is only a couple blocks away, anyway."

"B-but… You shouldn't have to reduce yourself…"

"It's not a big deal, Freed," he sighed, thinking to himself that at least it would take his mind off of the raven who was following a woozy bluenette into the house. He wasn't going to say anything, was just focusing on keeping his mouth shut, but Gajeel turned over his shoulder to glance at him.

"Looks like we both have friends that can't take care of themselves," he muttered and Levy spun around, brown eyes having a hard time focusing.

"Gajeel…! Hurry up! Have a good night Laxus!"

With that, they both left, turning in opposite directions from their house. Bix was close behind him and Freed's protests had become completely silent. His grip had become more relaxed and his face was buried in his shoulder. For a moment, he thought that he'd passed out but a sudden shift in his weight told him that wasn't the case.

"So… you're jealous," Bix was staring ahead, crossing his hands behind his head as he trotted beside him.

"You would know," he sighed, "Just can't help it, I guess."

"Are you having girl problems?" Freed slurred from his back, "Oh nooo… is it Mira?"

"Not this time," Bix grinned and Laxus shot him a glare, "He's pretty dense when he's like that."

"I am nooot!" he said in a sing-song voice, pressing his knees into Laxus's ribs so he could pull himself up and wrap his arms around his neck. He rested his chin on his shoulder and Laxus tipped away from him, trying to hide his annoyance, "So… who's the lucky girl? I didn't see you with anyone."

"That's because I'm not with anyone," he muttered through gritted teeth, wrinkling his nose at the smell of alcohol falling against his face.

"But Bixslow just said you were… an' he's never wrong."

" _Never_ ," Bix stressed the word with a wicked smile on his features.

"Never, never!"

"Well, I don't think you have anythin' to worry about!" Freed declared, tipping backwards to the point Laxus was worried he'd make them both fall over, "A strong, handsome man like you… she'll be falling for you in a heartbeat. I know I would!"

"You hear that? In a _heartbeat_ ," Bix cackled, "Just ask, Freed."

"Stop encouraging him," Laxus huffed but it had lifted his spirits if just slightly, "We're here."

They stopped in front of Freed's house and he could feel him slump against his back as if he weren't ready to get down. Laxus dropped his right leg, then his left, and finally stepped out of the way so he swayed on his own two feet. Bix crossed his arms and watched him stumble his way up the stairs, the entire time muttering about how Laxus had nothing to worry about and he didn't need any help getting in the door despite dropping his keys three times. When he finally opened the door and switched on the light he leaned gracelessly against the doorframe, eyeing Bixslow.

"Just a minute, princess, I'll tuck you in," he called and Freed huffed, stomping his foot before disappearing into his house. Bixslow chuckled and saluted Laxus before following the emerald-haired man.

Laxus sighed and started the trek home. It was chilly and each breath brought with it a plume of steam. He stuffed his hands into his pockets and looked up at the night sky, thinking to himself that the closer and closer they got to winter, the more crisp and clear the sky seemed to get. Thin, barely visible clouds shivered across the sky but the moon was full and made the streets bright with its silver shine.

He tried not to think about Gajeel and Levy and the fact that Gajeel used to like Levy and Levy clearly still had feelings for him. He huffed. She was just… all over him. She didn't leave him a moment to himself. How was he supposed to reach to that? He didn't want to think about them spending their entire mission together or the fact that they probably shared a hotel room. He wondered if they'd slept together. Actually, he didn't really want to know. He was sure Gajeel would refuse her if she tried… wouldn't he? Weren't he and Laxus more of a thing than whatever he had with Levy? But they weren't actually an item…

And of course, there was also the fact that she was a woman… and so very much everything a man like Gajeel would want. She was thin and pretty with eyes that lit up whenever he saw him and lips that begged him to come closer. She was innocent and caring. He was sure that holding her was probably a lot easier than holding him. She was tiny and soft; all round curves, not jagged and rough edges like he was. She'd probably whisper about how she thought he could do no wrong and whatever he'd done in his past she could somehow wipe away with her unending, pure love for him. And Laxus… well… was Laxus. He was a giant blonde brute with large, manly hands and a rough, toned body. He had characteristics that a woman desired but not really anything Gajeel looked for.

 _But he said he wanted you…_

He shook the idea out of his head. He tried to force his mind to stop thinking about Levy and Gajeel and what they could be saying and doing as he walked her home. He'd never said he was coming back… what if he spent the night with her? Maybe listening to Mira was a mistake. Maybe he should have never let Gajeel go on the mission with Levy. What if he had rekindled whatever feelings he used to have for her? He gritted his teeth.

He came back to a dark house that was mostly put together. The back yard had been packed up and Lily was nowhere in sight. Maybe he'd left with someone too. Wouldn't it figure that even the cat found someone to stay the night with while his thoughts turned into a whirlwind without a distraction to stop it. He sighed and marched up the steps to the second story, not even bothering to turn on a light, and made his way into his room.

His record player was already set up and he pulled open the crate he stowed his records away in, digging through them until he found an album with the least amount of love songs on it and set it up to play. He turned the dial, watched the vinyl spin for a moment, and set down the needle. He stared at it absentmindedly for a while, letting his mind just stop and take in the sound. He felt more at ease and walked over to fall on his bed, exhaustion from the day's work and entertaining company suddenly catching up to him. He stared at the ceiling and just tried to relax. Casually, he glanced back at his mirror to see his own reflection staring back at him.

He realized he was still wearing the leather jacket despite being inside and warm. A derisive scoff came out his nose, "So much for that."

It wasn't that he'd actually thought Gajeel would suddenly go mad for him in the thing. And, now that he thought about it, Gajeel had mentioned that he'd liked it. Maybe it wasn't a total loss after all. Actually, the kiss they'd shared had been anything but mild. Gajeel had pulled him close, had actually tried to taste his mouth. He remembered the heat, the angry desire that fought back with him in the doorway.

His heart started to pound a little faster and he felt that nagging in his pants again. He'd been taunting himself all day, it seemed. He strained his ears to listen, all too aware that at any minute Lily or Gajeel could come home. But that didn't stop his hand from travelling down to rub at his growing need distractedly. His tongue slipped out to wet his lips and he tucked a hand behind his head, trying to unwind.

Now that he thought about it, every encounter they'd had began and ended with Gajeel. He initiated their kiss. He brought it to an end. It wasn't like Laxus really had any control over it. Whenever he took the reins and tried to pursue Gajeel's affection, his eyes would dilate again and panic would start to bubble up to the surface. On more than one occasion Gajeel had needed to bring what they were doing to a screeching halt so he could get a hold of himself. Things were just too new, still, too out of control. They were eerily similar, the two men. Gajeel was terrified of losing control of his surroundings, of what was happening to him, and Laxus was scared of losing control of himself.

Control. It was all about control.

Laxus, though, wasn't in quite the mood to dwell on it. He closed his eyes and listened intently to the sounds of the house, trying to make sure there truly was no one home as he massaged himself a little harder. He wanted to let his mind wander to more promiscuous places for once. He'd never had to stay so reserved in a relationship before and tip-toeing around Gajeel was taxing. Kissing they had done plenty of times but actually touching the other man's body was something he hadn't been able to do. Gajeel was always the one doing because Laxus either didn't want to trigger him or didn't want to ruin the mood. He wanted to be the one to touch and tease. That wasn't a bad thing, was it?

He undid the top button of his jeans and slid his hand down to grab hold of his hard on. He let out a weary sigh as his thoughts quickly turned to the Iron Dragon. Those ruby eyes would look so nice rolling back in pleasure, he was sure. Laxus wanted to kiss his neck and listen to his tattered breathing. He wanted to run his hands over his body, feel the hard rise and fall of Gajeel's muscles. His pheromones drove him insane and just the remembrance made his dick twitch hungrily in his hand. The steam and the smell of soap and water in the public bath had drowned out the Slayer's scent and he missed what it was like when he finally came…

A creek on the stairs made his body tense. He froze, holding his breath and waiting for his pounding heart to slow. After a few beats of silence, he sighed and relaxed. Either he was just hearing things or the house was just settling. The nagging in his pants coaxed him into dropping his guard again and he was quickly picking up where he left off, closing his eyes and pressing the back of his arm against his forehead as if it would make his lecherous thoughts come back any faster. He freed himself from the confines of his jeans, frustrated. It was hot in his hand and each stoke made his breath come in a little faster and his sighs more heedless.

He thought again of the onsen and the way Gajeel had gripped the two of them together. His hand and the hot water was incredible. He wished he could have sparked between them. His muted shocks could have actually caused them a lot of pleasure. He wondered how Gajeel would have reacted to that. What did he really sound like when he was rolling in bliss? Did he try to hide his voice in lusty growls or breathy gasps? Did he cry out? Damn… he was kind of hoping he would… even if it was just his name…

The feeling hit him suddenly and ferociously that he was being watched. His heart suddenly started slamming in his chest and his eyes flew open. He tried to calm himself down, tell himself it was probably nothing. But when he peeked out from under his arm he caught sight of the corner of his door, wide open when he knew he'd left it closed. A pair of black boots made him relax slightly and he let his arm fall back over his eyes.

"You're a fucking freak, you know that?" he groaned, still slightly out of breath and agitated from the rude intrusion.

"Geehee…"

He felt heat creeping up his neck but he hadn't moved his hand from where it rested on his now furious want, "Shut the damn door."

He heard the click of the bolt and the faint shuffle of boots against hardwood as Gajeel crept closer. The bed groaned with the added weight of the Iron Dragon and Laxus could hear the shit-eating grin on his face before he even spoke, "Done."

"Gajeel…" he sighed, finally removing his barrier and finding himself looking up into two rubicund eyes. His signature half-smirk had his fangs dipping just slightly into view. Laxus's pulse quickened again, "I'm busy."

"Yeah?" he purred, tipping his head to the side as he spoke. His grin faded just slightly and he ran his tongue across his teeth nervously before he found his voice again, "What… What were you thinking about?"

This time it was Laxus's turn to have the smug look, "Not you."

"Bullshit,"

"You're right… you were dressed in frilly negligée. You like pink, right?"

"Fuck off."

"I was trying but you snuck in to watch like a fucking creep."

His lip quirked up in the corner again. He had a dark gleam in his eyes and he leaned down until his long black hair fell over his shoulder. His ruby irises were starting to swim with lust and Laxus's own desire throbbed anxiously in response.

"Were you thinking of me kissing you?" he lowered his voice until it rumbled deep in his throat. Laxus licked his lips as he wondered where this was about to go. Despite the front he was putting on, he could tell Gajeel was out of his element. The raven just barely hesitated before each thing he said, "Or… was I touching you?"

Laxus gritted his teeth and tried to contain the shiver that slipped down his back as Gajeel leaned down and kissed his chest. His gloved hand gripped his thigh so that his thumb was pressing against his soft flesh at the bend of his leg. He took in a steadying breath as Gajeel's lips travelled up to his clavicle and bit him gently on the sensitive part of his shoulder. He was hard again and aching, desperately wanting relief. But now he was worried about moving. He had to tiptoe again; unsure and fresh and new all over.

"Was I biting your neck?" he purred against Laxus's throat and he could feel his knees pressing into his side as he shimmied closer, "Or was I frotting you like back at the onsen?"

Despite himself, Laxus was starting to work his neglected member. He felt warm embarrassment trying to eat him alive from his stomach but he swallowed it down. He wanted this to last but he hadn't ever really been into this type of thing. He tried to relax and with the help of Gajeel's body pressed against his he was finding it easier and easier to get back to where he was before the interruption. Gajeel stopped his applications to his neck and shifted his weight on the bed so he could watch.

"Yer not doing it right," he chuckled, "Performance anxiety?"

"Shaddup," he growled, fighting to keep himself going despite feeling off-balance under Gajeel's intense stare.

"Do you need help?" he muttered grinding his hips into his side.

Laxus tipped his head back so he could watch Gajeel's face, "You need to shut up."

"Eh? Why's that?"

"Because…" his breath was coming in as gasps and he was finding it harder to concentrate. His hand was twitching, desperately wanting to reach out, "I want to touch you…"

"…yeah?" Gajeel licked his lips, a little bit of restlessness in his eyes.

"Yeah…" he couldn't help himself, he reached wildly and gripped onto Gajeel's arm, pulling him harshly down so his mouth would come crashing against his. He could feel the raven's arms trembling and he shifted his weight nervously. He pulled back from their heated kiss, gaining an agitated sigh from the Thunder God. He wanted him, he didn't know how much or how far but he wanted Gajeel. Gajeel's eyes widened slightly as if he could see it coming when Laxus gripped his shirt and pulled him down again. His breath was so hot and Laxus breathed it in, relishing in the muffled groan that snuck its way past Gajeel's lips. He ran his tongue into his mouth and tensed when Gajeel bit down and sucked it gently. Laxus peaked one eye open and met his. His eyebrows were drawn down but he didn't seem upset or worried.

He put his hands on Gajeel's waist and met his hips with his own, loving the way he gritted his teeth to keep in any noise. Laxus let his hands wander up, gripping his tunic and pulling it over his shoulders. The thing was long and awkward to get off, but Laxus was rewarded with Gajeel's bare, breathless form lying next to him. Laxus's hips were grinding against Gajeel's, forcing feverish gasps to shiver out of them both as Laxus gripped him tightly. He wanted to devour the man beside him. It was rising from the pit of his stomach and slowly burning its way through his chest. He wanted them to be connected. Fiercely.

He pulled back just for a moment and pulled himself on top of Gajeel. His red eyes widened and surprise could have been written in ink across his face. He didn't push Laxus away, though his movements were much more muted and unsure. Laxus bent down to pull him back into a fiery kiss, running his tongue against the Iron Dragon's as he sought to deepen their connection. He gripped the crook of his knee and angled him so their hips were flush with each other. He was probably being too rough but he was desperate to have him. Gajeel arched his back and muttered a curse as Laxus nipped hungrily at the soft flesh of his jawline.

"Laxsss…" his groan caught in his throat and turned into a hiss as Laxus's hand worked its way down his pants and gripped him harshly. He dug his nails into Laxus's biceps and arched his back. Laxus gazed down at him, relishing the rosy blush that was heating up his chest and face. His mouth was parted from his breathlessness and a light gleam from sweat was starting to dot his tanned skin. Laxus worked him, ran his thumb over his head which caused the Iron Mage to clench his teeth and let out a tattered sigh.

Laxus leaned down and nipped at his ear, ran his tongue along the outer shell and tasted the iron from his studs. Gajeel dug his nails in even more harshly, to the point of causing pain. He was going to bruise but it wasn't so bad as to make him want to stop. He could feel Gajeel pulsing in his hand, felt a slight trembling in his thighs. His scent filled the air with its feral, needy aroma and Laxus's mind was dizzy with intoxication from it. He wanted to see if his eyes would melt when he came…

"Haah…" Gajeel's breath was in his ear, "It's hot…"

Laxus ran his thumb across his head again, trying to drive him faster to his end goal.

"Shit… it's hot…" he was clutching his arms so tightly Laxus had to pause, wincing from the pain, "Laxus… I'm…"

"Gajeel…"

"I can't… breathe…!"

"Gaj-!"

He shoved him off, ripped himself up from where he was lying and stopped in the middle of the floor. He kept his back to back to Laxus as he stood, clutching at his chest as if it would soothe it's crazed beating. Laxus kicked himself. He'd pushed him too far. He cursed the raging hard-on that was trying to keep him from being focused on his companion. He put it away and righted himself as best he could without alerting the Iron Dragon who was still taking deep, shaky breaths to calm the panic in his veins. Laxus just sat on the edge of the bed, waiting patiently and unsure of what to say.

"Sorry," it was the first thing he could think of, and the only thing.

Gajeel didn't answer, didn't look at him, but the way his shoulders fell slightly proved enough to Laxus that he was eating himself alive already. Laxus just stared at his bare back and watched how his skin moved with each breath he took. His scars were fearsome and in the dim light he looked sort of like a battle-hardy soldier reliving some old war-time memory in the dark. Laxus was sure if he said something about it, though, Gajeel would scoff at him. He let out a tired sigh and he turned his mind to think of something to break the tense air between them. The record on the stand skipped and Gajeel watched it silently for a moment before finally lumbering over to move the needle off and send them into silence. He ran his fingers through his hair, still refusing to make eye contact with him and instead stare at the ground. He could make out the trembling in his fingers despite his seemingly cool demeanor.

"You alright?"

Gajeel's eyes fluttered shut and Laxus could see the vein on the side of his neck shutter as he clenched his jaw, "No… I'm not."

"Can I help?"

"T's fine… I'm just pissed,"

"Don't be. It's not your fault…" Laxus started but the rage in his eyes hushed whatever he was going to say.

"You're ok with this?" Gajeel growled, motioning between the two of them.

"Ok with what?" he was confused.

"This… stop and go… pussy-footing around shit," he spat the words out indignantly. Laxus just blinked, at a loss for words, "I mean, how long will I be like this? Months? _Years?_ What if it's _years_ , Laxus? What if I can't get over this stupid shit?"

"It's not stupid shit," Laxus bit back at him, trying to keep calm but not quite being able to, "And so what if it takes months? I'll wait."

"You'll wait," he sneered, pacing back to the middle of the floor.

"Yes. Weeks. Months. Years. However long it takes. You were tortured for almost two weeks. It's not something you just get over."

"I wasn't tortured," he paced back to the record player. Laxus swallowed past his closing throat.

"Then what _did_ happen, Gajeel?" Laxus crossed his arms, trying to figure out how far he should go to prove a point, "Because if it's so bad you can't talk about it, I'd say it's pretty damn close."

Gajeel huffed and stomped back, his face set in a scowl. He didn't say anything. He never did. They'd had this round before. Whenever Laxus mentioned what he thought happened Gajeel denied it. He'd even gone as far as to ask if he'd been raped but the Iron Dragon just refused to speak about it and deny anything bad had actually happened. But he knew something must have he just didn't know what. To be honest, he didn't have a desire to know out of morbid curiosity or that he felt the right. If he thought it were for the best, he'd let Gajeel keep what happened with him until he died. But he didn't think it would help him cope or heal. However, forcing him to relive the trauma would do nothing good for him either, so he never pressed the issue. Maybe one day Gajeel would divulge to him what he was forced to live through, but it wouldn't be over a squabble about his self-perceived ineptitude.

They lapsed back into silence and Gajeel just paced the floor, a tiger wired up and ready to break free of his enclosure. He was restless and angry. This was about his own weakness, Laxus was sure. He felt that by letting this get to him he was showing he couldn't handle the memories or his own emotions. No matter what Laxus tried it never seemed to do anything to alleviate his darker thoughts. Laxus just watched him as he lumbered back and forth across the room, red eyes flashing up in Laxus's direction as if he were checking just to be sure the Thunder Mage was still there.

"I was wondering if you were staying the night at Levy's," he mused, trying to open up a conversation and get him to stop his incessant patrolling of their confined space, "The way she was actin'… It wasn't exactly subtle."

"Eh?" Gajeel glanced at him out of the corners of his eyes, "Jealous?"

"Nah," he lied smoothly, "I was just thinking it was such an open invitation."

"I can't touch Levy," he muttered, not making eye contact. It spiked Laxus's blood a little.

"Right… you think she's too good for you…" he crossed his arms.

"I _know_ she's too good for me."

"Right… but if she wasn't then she'd be fair game," he didn't mean to sound agitated but it just slipped out anyway. But how could he help it? He was starting to feel inferior. He knew he wasn't Gajeel's type. Maybe it was just a matter of time before he was bored of fucking around with him and wanted to go after something more his speed. It seemed like a real possibility and it made his stomach sink. Maybe if it were someone like Levy being involved with him, Gajeel wouldn't feel so threatened and on edge. If he were with some small, thin, supple woman he wouldn't have as much of an intimacy issue…

Gajeel crossed his arms, "That ain't what I meant."

"Yeah well…" Laxus sighed and leaned back on his arm. He absentmindedly rubbed at his scar, a nervous habit he didn't usually indulge in unless he was feeling particularly vulnerable, "She's a nice girl… she'd probably be better…"

"Better?" Gajeel's lip curled up slightly as if he were about to snarl.

Laxus felt his stomach tighten nervously and he had to force the words out, "Yeah… she's more your type."

Gajeel raised a studded brow at him and Laxus was trying not to fidget under his gaze. He didn't like looking insecure. He wasn't some jealous girlfriend who was pissy just because Gajeel was being hit on by another woman. But he was a possessive man a heart and it was eating at him more and more each time he thought of Levy that maybe they weren't a good match for each other after all. He heard Gajeel click his teeth and he glanced over to see the Iron Mage smiling to himself. It wasn't a wicked or smug thing and it sort of eased the tension in Laxus's chest to see.

He walked over to the bed and sat down next to Laxus, making the bed groan as he dropped down on the mattress harder than was probably necessary. He leaned forward so that his arms rested above his knees and he was staring at his hands, thinking. Laxus watched him quietly, not sure if he wanted to prod him for words or not. It was clear he was struggling with his thoughts and he was worried that it was something he didn't want to hear… like he was regretting his decision to pursue this strange relationship of theirs.

He was quiet for a minute before he let out an exasperated sigh and straightened. Laxus could see red starting to creep up his neck and he laid his hand on top of his own. He leaned in and kissed him. It was simple and sweet, nothing like the heated kisses they'd shared in the past although it made his stomach flip even more ferociously than before. But he didn't just feel it there. He felt like his entire chest was exploding with it and when Gajeel pulled back he didn't meet his gaze.

"You kiss like a man," he muttered, staring at Laxus's silvery buttons, "And yer kind of an asshole."

"Gee… thanks."

"I kind of like it…" it was almost a whisper it was so quiet, but Laxus was sure he heard the words and it made his heart suddenly shudder in his chest. He couldn't help it, he smiled.

"Yeah?" he felt like such a kid, he was stupidly excited.

"Yeah… something tells me some nice girl like Levy isn't going to be like that," he actually met Laxus's gaze despite the furious blush that was taking over his face, "So you can stop glaring at her whenever she's around."

Now it was Laxus's turn to feel heat crawling across his face, "That obvious, huh?"

"Oh yeah," Gajeel smirked up at him and Laxus blinked when he felt the raven's fingers intertwine with his own, "Listen… I was thinking about maybe taking a vacation. All the shit that's happened recently… maybe it would be nice to get away… face some fears…"

Laxus's heart fell just a tad, "Yeah? You goin' alone?"

Gajeel rolled his eyes, "I can. But I figured you'd probably come with me."

Laxus blinked a few times, "You want me to?"

"You're dense as hell, Sparky," he snorted, "There's a place I'd been wanting to go when I finally got with somebody. It's stupid and romantic and shit, but when I first scoped the place out I thought I'd be impressing some dame..."

"Wait… you want to go on a couple's retreat?" Laxus's eyes widened and he felt his heart skip a few paces.

"Ya don't have to call it that," Gajeel wrinkled his nose at him again, "I just thought maybe it could help me… you know... get over some shit… face it head on, or whatever."

Laxus couldn't help it. It was too much for him to keep inside any longer. First, Gajeel told him he liked him back and now he wanted to go on a couple's retreat? He felt like a shaken-up bottle of soda, full of reckless energy and ready to explode. He leaned down and crashed his lips into Gajeel's, hearing the muffled surprise as he did so. Gajeel gripped his collar, pulling him back slightly so he could talk.

"So you wanna go?" he snickered as Laxus buried his face into his neck.

"Nah… just the fact that you asked me pisses me off…" he nipped at the flesh of his neck and Gajeel pulled away from him again.

"Oi! Calm the fuck down or we ain't goin'!"

Laxus pulled back and looked Gajeel straight in the eye. They were so close that he could feel the heat of his breath on his face, "So… this mean we're goin' steady?"

Gajeel wrinkled his nose again, "Going steady? How old are we?"

"Don't worry, darling, I'll buy the rings," he grinned and hot blush suddenly overtook Gajeel.

"You don't…! No! I refuse to be the girl!" he growled, although he could tell it wasn't mean spirited, "I ain't a fucking bottom."

"Bottom?" Laxus blinked at him.

"You… you don't know what a bottom is..." Gajeel's blush was suddenly much more ferocious.

"No,"

Gajeel studied him for a moment, "Laxus… aside from when you jumped me back then… have you ever had sex… with a man?"

"No," he paused, "But I mostly remember how it went."

The color suddenly left Gajeel's face and he scratched at his neck nervously, muttering, "Yer fucking kidding me…"

"I ain't gonna hurt you like that again… have some faith in me," he squeezed his hand but Gajeel didn't seem any more put at ease, "When were you wanting to leave?"

"This weekend…" he responded quietly, his gaze sort of distant, "Maybe I should buy a few things..."

He seemed uneasy, as if he were rethinking his decision, "I'll take care of it," Gajeel looked at him, slightly alarmed, "You said this was about facing our fears, right?"

"…yeah."

"I'm scared of heights," he stated and Gajeel seemed a little impressed by the easy confession, "You can help me with mine, and I'll help you with yours."

Gajeel diverted his gaze, "I'm not sure…"

Laxus tried to be sly but it was strange coming from his mouth, "What's wrong? Worried I can't love you better than a woman could?"

His blush was back with a vengeance and it almost made Laxus snicker, "More like I'm worried I'll lose my shit."

"Was everyone who came from Phantom this negative?"

"Are all of you Fairies so fucking overconfident?" he bit back.

There was no way Gajeel could bring him down from his high. He was too excited with the prospect of them working through this. He leaned over to steal another kiss and didn't stop the words no matter how ridiculous he thought they sounded after the fact, "I'm going to find a way to make you forget everything she did to you," his voice was just a low growl in the back of his neck as he spoke and the look on Gajeel's face made him want to pull him closer but he refrained, "The only marks you'll see on your skin will be from me."


	38. Chapter 38

Chapter 38:

"You said _what_?" Mira fanned herself excitedly, her eyes alight from his words.

"I was in the moment," he admitted, taking a sip from his drink as heat started creeping up his neck just thinking about it.

He and Gajeel had ended up sleeping in the same bed that night and the next morning he'd awoken to Gajeel's body pressed close to his own and it was almost heavenly, the simple thing that it was. They'd spoken a little over breakfast about what exactly Gajeel had in mind and decided to head out Friday morning and spend the night Friday and Saturday and be home again Sunday evening. When asked what hotel they'd be staying at Gajeel refused to tell him, something about not wanting him to look it up beforehand. It would be a surprise. It had piqued Laxus's interest but the thought of it being some big reveal was amusing so he'd let it be.

After breakfast Gajeel had declared he needed to get some things for the trip and so they'd split up, Laxus deciding that it would probably be best for him to be prepared as well. Surprisingly, though, he'd thought a lot about Gajeel's apprehension the day prior. It was true, he hadn't had sex outside from their encounter together and that was far from a good memory for either party involved. Laxus didn't want their unofficial 'first time' to be anything like that.

He wrinkled his nose. _Unofficial first time_.

Mavis's sakes, he was such a kid.

"It's a shame people don't actually work that way," Mira sighed, resting her hand in her palm, "That was such a stirring thing to say."

"Eh? Why can't they?" he muttered. The waitress sashayed by with their food and set it down gently in front of them, making sure to give Laxus a wink when she told him to ask her if he needed anything, and then she flitted off again to the next table.

Mirajane smiled sweetly at him, giving him a look not too unlike a mother giving their child a heavy dose of reality, "Remember how it took a couple months for Gajeel to get out of his depression? And you even mentioned he still has bad days? It's the same thing, Laxus. Trauma… especially psychological… you can't just say nice words and make it go away. Honestly, he should probably see a specialist."

"He won't see a specialist," Laxus muttered. It wasn't like they'd actually had a conversation about it but if he wouldn't even talk to Wendy about it then he was fairly certain bringing up going to a psychologist would make for a fairly short conversation, "And I don't have months. I have, like, two days."

"What's happening in two days?" her brow furrowed slightly and he felt the blush finally break past his neck to his cheeks. Her eyes widened and she shot him a keen look, "Laxus… why _did_ you meet up with me today…?"

He felt like he was going to die from embarrassment, "Mirajane… don't get carried away…"

"Laxus...!" her voice was an excited whisper, "Do… do you need advice?"

He was starting to wish he could sink into his seat, "I said don't get carried away."

"Come to think of it… you really haven't had sex with another man before, have you?" her blue eyes were filled with mischief as she spoke, completely ignoring her food, "Unless you have and haven't told me…"

She eyed him pointedly and he pretended to shrug her off as he stuffed fried rice into his mouth. Mira let out an exasperated sigh and busied herself with her salad. He wasn't completely upset with her eagerness to help, it was what he'd met up with her for in the first place. He liked the relationship they'd fallen into as of late. She truly was like his younger sister, his partner in crime, and he sort of enjoyed it. She knew things about him that no one else did, not even the Thunder God Tribe. And as much as he enjoyed their company, he definitely hadn't slept with any of them, so really Mirajane was the best person to ask about his shortcomings in bed. Now all that was left was actually getting the balls to say it out loud.

But if she insisted on going to sex shops with him… he might actually die from the embarrassment.

If he were honest, he didn't really know where to start. He'd watched gay porn before, it wasn't like he didn't know where this would all end up. At some point, anal sex would be brought up; which he figured would happen he just didn't really know when or how… or who would be on bottom. He blinked at his food.

 _That was what Gajeel had meant by bottom._

He blushed and heard Mira laugh impishly, "Thinking about something dirty, Laxus?"

"No, I'm not!" he snapped a little too harshly and she laughed again, completely seeing through him.

She leaned onto her wrist and waved at him with her fork, "Don't be so shy, Laxus. It's just natural to want to be with someone you love."

"Yeah, well… I just…" he sighed agitatedly and refused to look at her through the embarrassment etched across his face, "I want to do things right for once."

She looked at him steadily, then, as if she were actually considering his words, "You're serious?"

"Well, yeah…" he pulled at the collar of his shirt.

"Why? What are you so worried about?" she gave him an encouraging smile.

"Without going into too much detail," he avoided her gaze as he spoke and felt his stomach slowly turning to stone in his guy just remembering, "Remember Bianca?"

Any humor left in her face suddenly vanished and she became very serious, "Of course."

"You remember what her business was, right?"

She watched him keenly, a firm look on her face, "Laxus… what happened?"

"I don't know how much Gajeel wants people to know… and it ain't exactly something I want to talk about either," he muttered, already feeling like he'd said too much.

"You're worrying me, Laxus," Mira muttered quietly, "That woman… she was into human trafficking and sexual deviancy…"

He didn't look up at her, just stuffed a mouthful of rice into his mouth.

"Was it not consensual?" her voice was soft and he could feel her mood quickly changing from concerned to agitated, "What _happened_ , Laxus."

"It was nobody's fault but _hers_ ," he muttered and Mira seemed to quiet some, "We can talk about it some other time, but not now."

She was motionless for a while, just studying him, when she finally reached across the table and put her hand on his, "You're a strong person."

He met her eyes and could see tears gathering on the lip of her eyelid. He moved his hand from hers, "And here I was worried about you gushing too much when I was the one who ruined lunch."

She smiled at him, a bit of wickedness in her eyes, "I wouldn't have ruined our lunch."

"Of course not, Mira. You're the picture of perfection," he said backhandedly.

"You didn't have to say it out loud," she smiled, pretending to take his words at face value. Her smile faded again as she thought to herself, "Well… if you _really_ want good advice, I can't give it to you."

"Eh?" he looked up at her, surprised, "That's a lot coming from you."

"I am not a gay man, Laxus," she waved at him dismissively, "But you're in luck. I know someone we can talk to."

"…yeah? And who is that?" he raised his eyebrow, worried about how many people she was about to get involved in his escapade.

She motioned towards the register and started summoning her mind-link magic, "Just go pay for our food."

"I was hoping to keep this quiet, still, Mirajane," he growled but she just waved him away, already chattering to someone across Magnolia. He reluctantly did as she said, paid their bill, politely turned down the waitress who'd been hitting on him, and made his way back to the table. By the time he got there she was already getting up to head towards the door and he – if a bit grudgingly – followed.

"So… do you know what he's into?" she smirked over at him as they walked and Laxus flinched at her words, thinking she was talking _far_ too loudly for the public streets of Magnolia.

"What do you mean?" he muttered.

"What gets his engine going?" she laughed at his embarrassment, "You know, what turns him on? Gets him hard?"

"I get it, Mira," he growled through gritted teeth and she laughed all the harder, "I don't know."

"You don't know _anything_?" she persisted, "Did the jacket work?"

"Yes," he replied tensely.

"Well, there's that," she smiled over at him, "So he likes leather? Are we going clothes shopping?"

"Probably not," he sighed at her.

"But we are going to a few _adult stores_ , aren't we?" she grinned at him wickedly and he felt himself blush at her words again.

"I don't think I need your help with that," he forced past gritted teeth only to feel her patting his arm.

"Oh, don't worry, you will," she said cryptically and steered him towards a neighborhood that was starting to look more and more familiar. Actually, this place wasn't too far from his own house. He looked around.

"Where are you taking me?"

"Freed's house," she smiled at him and sure enough he saw the familiar siding come into view.

"Why?"

Mira looked at him critically, "Laxus… you _do_ know that Freed is gay, don't you?"

He looked at her blankly and she let out a tired sigh, "He never brought it up?"

"I pity Gajeel. You are the densest man I've ever met in my life," she knocked on his door rapidly, "This is going to be a long conversation."

"What's that supposed to mean?" he bristled at her words but the sound of a latch made him settle. Freed crossed his arms in the doorway and glared at Laxus, "What?"

"You're bisexual?" he narrowed his eyes and looked Laxus up and down, "Since when?"

Laxus crossed his arms, "What kind of a question is that?"

Mira stepped backwards as Freed advanced towards Laxus, his expression not quite cross but definitely not friendly.

"I've been hitting on you for _years_ , Laxus Dreyar. You never even looked my way!" he got up into Laxus's face to the point he leaned back slightly, eyes wide that the emerald-haired Freed could be so angry with him.

"I mean…" Laxus looked to Mira for help but she just smiled, "Mavis's sakes, you're my teammate. We're like brothers. We've know each other for years."

"So, even if you _had_ realized I was hitting on you, there was never any chance?" he seemed to deflate slightly and Laxus didn't know what to say.

"I'm sorry?" he offered but Freed just turned on his heel, throwing his long green hair over his shoulder at him and hitting him in the chest.

"Save it! I don't need your pity," he huffed dramatically and headed inside.

"Guess that's what Bix and Ever meant by he'd be pissed," Mirajane placed her finger over her mouth to signal him to hush but it was too late. He heard Freed scream from somewhere in the house.

"All of the Thunder God Tribe knew except me?!"

"If it makes ya feel any better, it's just been recent…" he paused while stepping across the threshold, "Well except for Bix. He probably knew even before I did."

"Of course Bickslow would know!" Freed raged from further in the house, "But why didn't he _tell me_ ,"

"I'm sorry you're having a crisis, Freed," Mira interjected, pushing past Laxus's hesitance, "But he did come to ask for your help."

Laxus followed her in, his eyes immediately falling on the two couches in the living area. Both had floral patterns and matched his curtains. The rug was lush and the wooden furniture was lavish and well made with intricate carvings you'd expect to see in a mansion not a three-bedroom house. Bickslow was right, after all, his place was gaudy. And now that Laxus was aware Freed was gay, it was _painfully obvious_. He'd always been touchy, and even touchier when Laxus was involved. He was always making over him to the point of extremes but Laxus had always just chalked it up to being who he was as a person, or maybe he felt obligated because he was the son of the guildmaster. After all, he'd been that way ever since they were young…

"Yes, yes, I _know_!" Freed muttered from the kitchen. Mira took a seat at one of the couches and Laxus sat across from her, leaving the coffee table to separate them. It had a fogged glass window and through it Laxus could make out exuberant colors from the coffee table books Freed kept. The one he currently had on display was about script magic. Laxus stayed silent and glanced about the room, eyeing some pictures of the Thunder God Tribe that he kept on the mantle above a quiet fireplace. One of him and Freed stuck out to him and he felt incredibly stupid for never realizing just how much Freed had it for him. He really was dense.

Freed glided into the room with a tea set. It had to have been some sort of expensive china. He poured a couple of cups of green tea and handed them out, never once looking Laxus in the face although he could see a slight blush on his cheeks, whether from anger or embarrassment it was hard telling. He finally took up post next to Mirajane, crossing his ankle over his knee as he sunk into the seat, a much more relaxed pose than his usual straight-backed posture.

"You never actually told me what you two wanted to talk to me about, Mirajane," Freed tutted, stirring his tea furiously, "Just that it involved Laxus's sexuality."

Mira glanced over at Laxus and smiled, "Well, tell him Laxus."

Freed finally looked up at him, blue eyes more curious than agitated or hurt. Laxus glanced over at Mira who made no move to help him. He had to explain this all himself? He sighed, already regretting his decision to get Mira involved and follow her out this far. But it was too late to back out now, and honestly, he needed to know more than he did currently. He fidgeted with his cup a little bit before finally getting the nerve to start talking.

He took a breath and jumped, "I'm seeing someone and… I don't actually know how to have sex… with him."

Freed's eyes widened and Mira smiled, "Graceful."

"And you're here to… what…? Get pointers?" Freed looked over at Mira for confirmation and she just gave him one of her salacious grins, "You're kidding."

He looked back at Laxus who shrugged in return. Freed chuckled darkly.

"I finally find out the man I've been crushing on is bi and he asks me for advice on how to have sex with someone else," he slumped a little more in his seat, "This is the worst day of my life."

Laxus felt extremely awkward. He crossed and uncrossed his legs, still not taking a sip of the tea that Freed had given him. He was honestly starting to feel bad. How could he have gone so many years without realizing what was going on? But it wasn't exactly like he could change his feelings now. First Mira and now Freed… was he going to piss anyone else off with his relationship with Gajeel?

Mira patted Freed on the leg and smiled, saying something about how it wasn't his fault Laxus was so thick-headed.

"You're enjoying this, aren't you?" Laxus hissed over at her and she looked at him innocently.

"Me? Of course not," but when Freed wasn't looking he could see the smirk in her eyes. The total gossip, she was definitely enjoying this.

"Well, you decided to put your faith in me so I won't let you down," Freed straightened and Mira grinned.

"That's the spirit," she encouraged him and he took a sip of his tea, invigorated.

"So… how far have you two gone, exactly?" Freed asked blatantly and Laxus opened his mouth and then shut it again, not quite sure how to answer. Mira studied him for a moment.

"You've gotten past kissing, haven't you?" she offered, coaxing him forward.

He felt unbearably hot in the small room, "Yes."

She smiled a bit more, "Heavy petting?"

"You're so direct, Mira," Freed fanned himself, his mind in obvious places that only exacerbated Laxus's embarrassment.

"I got that down," Laxus muttered, feeling as if his humiliation would swallow him alive, "It's mostly just the main event I'm worried about,"

Freed watched him and took pity on him, realizing how hard it was for the Thunder God to admit this all out loud, "What has you so worried? Surely you can figure out most of this with your partner? They should kind of know what they like and dislike."

Laxus didn't respond but it didn't seem like Freed needed much assistance in figuring out the problem.

"He's straight, or he _was_ straight, am I right?" Freed rubbed his temples, "But still…?"

Mira was staring hard into Laxus. Freed was asking the questions she hadn't known to and it only raised more red flags to her, the only difference was that she actually know who they were talking about was Gajeel. Laxus sighed, resigned, and Freed stopped his contemplation. He could tell Laxus was about to drop something heavy and he glanced over at Mira for confirmation.

"Who is it?" he asked slowly, as if he weren't actually sure he wanted to know.

"I swear to everything on Earthland, you two, what I'm going to tell you today doesn't leave this room," Laxus snapped and the two waited quietly in response, "The other guy is Gajeel."

Freed stood up, shock, anger and disbelief clear on his face, "What?! No!" he looked at Mira.

"It's Gajeel," she smiled.

Freed looked from Laxus to Mira and then finally sank back down into his seat, "I… just… I never pegged him for that kind of… person."

"Yeah, well, neither did he," Laxus snorted just a tad ironically.

Freed's lip tugged up in the corner, "Look at you… turning a straight man…"

"Well… it was definitely an accident," Laxus sighed, staring down at his cup,

"Wait… what?" Freed piped up, stopping him, "I'm confused. Start from the beginning."

Laxus didn't move his eyes from his tea, "Freed, do you remember the mission Gajeel went on a couple of months ago? The one that the Magic Council got involved in?"

"Uh… yeah…"

"How much do you know?" Laxus glanced up and saw Freed shake his head, "Gajeel killed a woman named Bianca. She was the head of a sex trafficking ring… and she'd kidnapped him. That's why he was gone for three weeks."

Freed's eyes widened and the color left his face, "She… kidnapped… Gajeel? And he _killed_ her?"

"Her and everyone in the warehouse that worked for her," Laxus kept his aqua gaze as he spoke, "And that wasn't the first time we'd run into her."

"We?" Freed pressed.

"Yeah… she was after me, too," Laxus swallowed harder than he really should have, but the remembrance of the last time he'd seen her, a woman with reptilian eyes and black tongue that slipped past sharp teeth, suddenly had his palms sweating as he held his cup. He took a steadying breath, "The first time we'd run into her was almost a year ago now, back when we'd both happened to take two jobs that overlapped with shit she was into. Gajeel was trying to track down kids that had gone missing and I was investigating thefts in the area involving potion shops. Turns out she was behind both and was masquerading in one of the nearby towns as a doctor to pick up kids who didn't have anywhere to go."

"I don't understand, what does any of this have to do with your current problem?" Freed started but a quick look from Mira hushed him.

"Mira's been trying to get this out of me for a while," Laxus tried to be a little light-hearted but he fell short of his goal. He thumbed at the side of his glass, "Something a lot of people don't know, or _I_ didn't at least, is I guess Dragon Slayers go into heat like the dragons did back when they ruled Fiore. Gajeel and Natsu go through it and Wendy will when she's old enough, but I never did because I'm not a first-generation Dragon Slayer, but only a Slayer because of the lacrima Gramps infused in me when I was a kid. Bianca somehow got her hands on the information and made a potion that could… induce it."

When he looked up again both Freed and Mira were quiet with worried expressions plastered across their faces.

"It was awful," he scratched at the back of his neck, his stomach had started to feel sick remembering it all but he powered through, "Can't believe it's something Gajeel and Natus deal with every year."

"She made you…?" Mira's blue eyes were horrified.

"Didn't have to," he pulled up his shirt as and glanced down at his scar. A healer had helped with the wound but after an entire night of bleeding she hadn't been able to help the skin that had already started to heal by itself. It was jagged and rough, but a light scar still existed as proof of the encounter, "She made it so it could just soak into the skin. As a test run she decided to throw the potion bottle at me…"

"Master Makarov had said that you'd tried to kill Gajeel," Mira murmured, "That a potion made you think he was an enemy…?"

"Gajeel told him that… told us both that… I didn't actually remember what happened until later," he left out the part that Bianca had given him something that jogged his memory, figuring it was probably best they didn't know. He was having a hard time meeting their gaze as he continued, "I think he was trying to protect me since the Magic Council was involved."

"What happened?" Mira pressed but her voice was quiet, not ready to hear what he was going to say.

"What do you think, Mira? I didn't know what was happening to me and I didn't have any control over what I was doing. I was just pissed off and scared and felt like my skin was crawling…" he sighed bitterly, sinking deeper into the couch. His skin started to prickle as if a residual memory still lurked beneath his flesh. He shivered, "I just wanted it to end… and I remember I kept thinking it was Gajeel's fault… somehow…"

He lapsed into silence, the memories suddenly bubbling to the surface with a startling ferocity. He could almost see Gajeel lying on the floor, begging him to stop, red eyes full of pain. He felt his heart starting to drop from his ribcage, down to his stomach, and roll into his toes. Maybe he shouldn't be doing this. Hadn't Gajeel been through enough? He didn't really deserve this chance he was given from the Iron Mage. He should just back out now before he got hurt again… since that was all Laxus was good for… hurting him…

"I… had no idea…" Mira's voice broke through his swirling thoughts and he tried to center himself again, focus on his feet on the ground and his weight in the seat, remember why exactly he was here, "And you still want to be in a relationship with him?"

"After all that… how do you not just remember the bad things? Doesn't he… bring up bad memories?" Freed's voice was just above a whisper, as if he couldn't believe the words coming from his mouth.

"I don't think of any of that when I'm alone with him…" Laxus spoke quietly and stared at his own reflection in his now-cold tea, "…I think he's amazing. I put him through hell so many times and he didn't abandon me even when I wouldn't have blamed him. That night he could have left me and run, but he didn't. When my Dragon Instincts were driving me insane he taught me how to use them when he didn't have to… And Bianca would have killed me if he hadn't come back to look for me. It's strange because he thinks I saved his life but actually he's saved mine. And after _everything_ that's happened, I asked him to give us a shot because I thought I might like him. He could have said no, right? It would have been easier. He could have settled down with anyone else, someone who didn't bring back those bad memories for him, but instead he chose to give it a try…

"I think I owe it to him, then, to try as hard as he is. I'm sure we can just fumble our way through it like everything else, but I kind of want this to maybe help him start over… make some _good_ memories to finally start drowning out all the hell he's been through, you know? I don't know if it will do any good, but if Gajeel's willing to try then I want to give it my all, too."

He hadn't really meant for that to sound so rousing at the end but it just sort of came out. When he looked up at Mira and Freed they were both fighting tears.

"The way you're so ready to fight for him… it's just so…" Freed wiped at his eyes, "You're such an inspiration,"

"I'm impressed with you, Laxus…" Mira smiled and sniffled slightly, "I honestly do hope this works out the way you're wanting it to."

He sighed, feeling loads lighter than he had when he'd walked into Freed's house, "I do too."

They were silent for a few beats, each of them in their own thoughts for a moment, before Freed finally broke the silence.

"Well… I guess I'll be the one to ruin our profound conversation with talk about sex, then," he muttered, his face flushing red.

"Ah, yes… that," Laxus suddenly felt extremely awkward again, "I'm in your hands."

Freed fanned himself, "Don't say things like that to me…"

"Try to contain yourself, Freed," Mira smiled over at him and he huffed.

He took on a studious air to him when he finally started, "Well… I guess we'll just start with the basics, then."


	39. Chapter 39

**Author's Note:**

 **I never leave one of these so this must be important!**

 **This is your friendly heads up that this chapter get's a little real. It's graphic and if you are triggered by scenes of rape then I don't recommend reading. I'll put a break so you know when the shit's about to go down so you can skip. If that's something that you don't think you can handle then I suggest maybe skipping the chapter entirely. You will lose a little bit of story but not too terribly much.**

 **Also, while I'm here I want to give a shoutout to all of my people who leave reviews (especially Desna)! You guys keep me going! Thank you so much for your support!**

 **Thanks!**

Chapter 39:

Gajeel was sitting in his room alone, his eyes focused on the small, black-bound book sitting on his desk. He regarded it coolly as if it were a snake coiled and waiting for him to get within striking distance. He let out a sigh. He scratched at his palm as nervous sweat made them tingle angrily. This was immensely stupid, feeling this uneasy over a stupid black book.

There wasn't anything inside of it yet, just line after line of emptiness begging to be filled. But he wasn't here to fill it with flowery words or song lyrics or even a novel like Lucy. The edgy feeling in his fingers wasn't from a want to write a song or poem that he could put to the music of his guitar later. No, this strange apprehension was because he was anticipating what his own mind was about to put him through… assuming he got the courage to write it all down.

He sighed and leaned back in his chair, eyeing it almost as if he knew it would vanish from the desk if he removed his gaze for too long. Wendy had given it to him as a house warming gift with just some simple instructions on the first page and a pamphlet that he'd wanted to shred as soon as he read the first few words.

"Dealing with Trauma"

She was a sweet girl and worried about him. Hell, who _wasn't_ worried about him. But maybe Lily had let on too much in the past weeks when he'd been asking for advice on how to deal with Gajeel. She'd looked into a few things involving the case, he knew, although he was sure Charla put a stop to it before she got too deep. So inside on the first page, in the sweetest little girl's handwriting was a note that he could tell she'd thought a great deal about before she wrote it. It was simple, really, but it was the reason he was here glaring down the book. She recommended that he write down his experience, to read it, let himself feel whatever it was that he needed. She had said that sometimes the best way to work through something was to let it all out, and of course that if he needed someone to talk to there were numerous people ready to be there for him, most notably Juvia.

Juvia… he sort of felt bad for avoiding her. She wanted so desperately to be there for him through all this. He knew she felt guilty for not realizing he'd been spiraling so terribly that he'd think of attempting to take his own life. She'd been inconsolable that night and clung to him as if he'd suddenly vanish from her forever if she let him go. Her tears were so sour and had made him feel like an even worse piece of shit than he already did. How could he do that to her? He really was the worst type of person to cause his friends so much grief. It still made his heart hurt remembering the way she begged him not to do it again, knowing all too well they'd been through this before.

He suddenly realized his lips were extremely dry.

He didn't need any help with this. He'd been through worse and he'd never needed help before. He'd had his life threatened, his friends' lives, been beaten until he thought he wouldn't survive, and faced terrifying threats. He'd stared death in the face before and didn't bat an eyelash. He'd seen men killed. He himself was a murderer. He didn't need help getting through this insignificant event in his life.

He wasn't scared.

He wasn't traumatized.

He felt a nagging at the back of his mind and he finally tore his eyes from the black cover to glance over to his dresser. He had hidden a pack of cigarettes there and hadn't really thought a lot about them until now. He hadn't had the itch to smoke since he and Laxus had started running. Actually, he hadn't had the itch to do a lot of things since then... things that were suddenly starting to bubble up.

He itched at his wrist, still staring at the drawer that held his vice. Just a smoke to calm his nerves wouldn't be that much of a sin, would it? It would help take the edge off, maybe make this a little easier. Not that he _needed_ it to be easier because there was nothing difficult about what he was supposed to do. It was simple, easy even. He was just going to write what happened. It didn't have to be long, just a few short paragraphs about when he was kidnapped.

Kidnapped. He'd been… kidnapped.

He was a man. Men didn't get _kidnapped_. _Kids_ got kidnapped. Frail women got kidnapped. Not men who were strong, men who could fight, men who could kill. He wasn't kidnapped… he was too strong. He wasn't helpless. He wasn't weak…

Damn, he really wanted that cigarette. He stood up and paced over towards the drawer and got so far as putting his hand on the knob. He stayed his motion, refused to grip it. There wasn't a reason not to, was there? Just one… one wouldn't be so bad. And then he'd start writing. So why did he feel so guilty, then? Maybe it was because he'd told Laxus he wouldn't touch them again. They destroyed the lungs and attacked the heart, they savagely assaulted the body. They were bad for you but they sedated him when he badly felt he needed it.

Sedated… did he want to be sedated again? If he was sedated he could be controlled. Isn't that the same method _she_ had employed?

This was different. A cigarette wasn't a tranquilizer or whatever the hell else that had been pumped into his system. It was a vice, like alcohol or gambling. It was a bad habit, one that he had total control over. And if he had total control over it, he didn't need it. So when he told Laxus he wouldn't touch them again he knew he could do it. So why did he keep the extra pack of cigarettes?

Just in case.

Just in case his nightmares got bad again, or he felt like he was a little too on-edge. He didn't keep them in case he felt the need to hurt himself, slowly or by burning his lungs and skin. He'd put that behind him. After all, Juvia had been so upset when she'd found out. He couldn't stand to make her cry like that again. And although he'd said those words more than once, this time he actually meant them. He wasn't going to spiral again. He was better. He had a lot of people who cared about him, who'd miss him if he were gone. So he didn't have room for thoughts of suicide or self-harm.

He stepped away from the dresser but his mind was still racing at the thought of the smell of nicotine, lingering for just a moment too long on the memory of digging hot embers into his skin and the smell of singed flesh. He itched at his wrist, this time maybe a little too hard. His heart was pounding… why was his heart pounding? Why was he getting all worked up? There was no reason to be this way. He was fine. Everything. Was. Fine.

"You're stalling," he rumbled out loud to himself, feeling silly for talking to the air. He looked over at the book on his desk and clicked his teeth. He walked back over to his desk, feeling as if every step took an incalculable amount of time. He sat down, placed his feet flat on the floor, and ripped the cover open. He picked up the pen and placed it on the white, wrote the first few words that came to mind.

 _It didn't feel real, like a nightmare_.

He scowled. Crossed it out. His penmanship wasn't great but hell it had never been _that_ bad. He looked at his hands and snarled. They were trembling and a slight throb was making his pen twitch in his hand from how hard he was gripping it.

"Useless…" he felt anger boil up in his chest and suddenly shoot down his arm. He threw his pen across the room, listened to it ping off the wall and clatter somewhere on the floor. He ripped himself up from his seat, took both hands and ran them through his raven locks, pulling his hair and digging the tips of his fingers into his scalp until he was sure he might start breaking the skin. In a massive, allaying sigh he brought his hands down his face, let his fingertips press into his neck, chest…

He couldn't write with his hands shaking like that and the more he thought about it the worse he shook. He was going to get angry if he kept this up. He glanced around the floor and found a piece of his pen rolling on the ground. Great. Now he needed a new one. He might even need to run to the store if they didn't have any downstairs. He picked himself up from his seat again and tromped down the stairs.

It was quiet in the house. Lily was spending the day on a mission with Wendy and Charla. Laxus was out getting things together… for their _couple's retreat_.

He felt his heart beat a little harder.

They were going to be alone together… for two nights. For a moment, he thought about the night prior. It might have seemed he was being overly cruel to the blonde but in all actuality Gajeel had been testing himself. He'd come home after dropping off Levy, had thought that maybe he'd already be asleep since the lights were off. The sound of the record player must have masked his noise as he came in the front door and he'd taken care on the steps to make as little disturbance as possible. When he'd heard Laxus suddenly go still it had piqued his interest and when he was on the landing how could he have helped it when his blood spiked? It was Laxus's fault for being so careless and loud. He hadn't even noticed when the door had eased open.

When he'd come upstairs and saw Laxus laying there, chest heaving, legs outstretched and tense, there was absolutely no denying how his body felt towards that man. _That fucking man_ … He pressed his hand to his chest as if it would somehow slow it down. He knew it was perverted and creepy as hell but he just couldn't tear his eyes away. Even remembering his figure lying there blissfully allowing himself to give in to the carnal desires he was forced to ignore made Gajeel start to feel his own lascivious warmth creeping up his chest and throat. He had such immaculate skin to touch and taste; white and blemish-less, not covered in scars like his own. He'd never thought of a man that way before… as being beautiful…

Gajeel had never dreamed of picturing himself as gay before. He'd not ever really allowed himself to look at men or think of them that way. At Phantom, all his buddies talked about women, fucked with women, and degraded anything that seemed weak in their eyes as being feminine. You were strong and bloodthirsty and you didn't submit, someone submitted to you. No one had ever said it outright, but quietly men weren't allowed to touch men. Girls on girls were fine because it was hot and every guy wanted to be between them but it was never allowed to be the other way around.

Coming to Fairy Tail was already such a transition. He had thought he was pretty secure in his sexuality. He didn't feel the need to question how he felt towards men. He knew he'd wanted to get with Levy and that he was still sexually attracted to women with low cut tops and skirts that were too short. He didn't catch his eyes lingering on men at the onsen or find himself getting hard whenever Gray would strip. Even when he'd fucked around with Natsu it had always been jumpstarted by their heat and aside from maybe an angry kiss they'd only touched themselves, never each other. Being with Laxus was an entirely new experience in a million different ways. Yes, Laxus had done things to him before but he'd never actually watched it happen. With his eyes closed he could trick himself into thinking it was a woman he was kissing… even the night he was drunk and Laxus had done what he wanted in his old house…

A shiver snaked its way down his spine.

They'd kissed. He'd made salacious gestures at the Lightning Mage when he thought no one was looking. The onsen was… _an experience_. That was the first time he'd actually touched him. He'd felt sort of like he'd had to after forcing him to stop as abruptly as he had. He was a man, he knew what it was like to be going and then suddenly get cut off. He was worried that maybe he wouldn't like it or it would be too strange and he couldn't actually get him off. But that definitely wasn't what had happened. He'd actually really enjoyed himself. When he'd had themselves in his hand there was no refuting it then, he was definitely with another man… and he had found himself getting lost for the first time since getting back.

For the first time being intimate didn't cause his heart to seize in his chest and his mind to spiral towards Bianca and being tied down to a table. Maybe it was the cold water, but he didn't feel like he was being forced into that unnatural heat. He just wanted to feel good and make his partner feel good.

 _Laxus_. He swallowed. He wanted to make _Laxus_ feel good.

Gajeel shook his head. He was so lost in his thoughts today. Didn't he have something he needed to do?

He sighed and forced himself to focus on one simple task at a time. He looked around the kitchen and cursed under his breath when he couldn't find anything to write with. He checked the living room and found nothing. How did they move and not have a single damn thing to write with? He huffed. Well, he did need to buy a few more things. He could get that done while he was out. Then he'd come back and write. He'd get it all off his chest so maybe he'd be in a better mindset. It was like meditation: out with the bad and in with the good.

He felt that familiar nagging at the back of his mind, the desire to finally grab that pack of cigarettes itched at him. He could smoke one on the way to the store. Just one to help calm him down and get him in a better mood. He'd do his shopping and be home with a clear mind. That would be fine, right?

He hesitated a moment and then stole himself back up the stairs. He pulled open the drawer and squashed the pang of guilt he felt as he grabbed the box. He flipped it open and pulled out one, a compromise. He wouldn't take the whole pack but he would take one. He dug around for his book of matches and snatched one, telling himself that if for some reason he couldn't light it on the first try then it was the heavens telling him to stop smoking.

He marched back down the steps and headed for the door, his anxious need causing him to go ahead and strike his match as he turned the nob. He pushed the door open with his back and spun around, finally bringing the lit vice to his lips to take a puff. A sudden cry of surprise made him jump back into the door and he bumped into a solid figure. His heart immediately started slamming in his chest and on impulse he dodged out of reach of whoever he'd just walked into. He steadied himself as his eyes focused on Bickslow, still reeled back in alarm from running into him, dark red eyes filled with wild surprise as he watched the raven.

"Shit… you scared me," Gajeel muttered.

"Scared, scared," his floating totems flitted up around their master as if they were checking to see he was ok.

"Perfect timing," he grinned, putting his hand on his hip as he settled, "What's Laxus doing?"

Hearing his name almost made him feel bad for putting the cigarette to his lips and taking a nice, slow dreg. But after running into Bickslow like that he felt he needed the damn thing more than ever… or maybe he was just looking for excuses.

"He's not in," he muttered, "And I was also just leaving."

Bickslow seemed to deflate a little bit, "Ah… well damn. Freed's got company and Ever is… _busy_ …"

"Busy, busy!"

Gajeel could only assume what that meant, but it was pretty obvious he was bored and looking for someone to hang with for the time being. He eyed the navy-haired man. He absolutely hated those fucking totems. They were creepy as hell. Not to mention whenever Bickslow didn't have his helmet on he always seemed to be staring. Gajeel had seen him on more than one occasion getting lost in his own gaze at someone, as if he were trying to see through them. Come to think of it, what kind of magic did he use? Didn't everyone in the Thunder God Tribe have something weird about their eyes?

He sighed, filling the space between them with acrid smelling smoke. He was one of Laxus's friends. If they ended up turning into a couple then he'd better get used to him.

"Eh… I'm going to the store, yer free to tag along if yer that bored," he muttered, taking another hit. Bickslow grinned and that manic look that never left his eyes flared, making him a little uneasy. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea…

"Where are we going?" he followed him off the porch with a little too much pep in his step.

"I have to buy some pens," he muttered into his hand as he brought the cigarette to his face, "And a few other things…"

"Sounds like a fun time," Bickslow smiled cheekily as his dolls floated overhead, laughing as they flitted around. Gajeel watched him quietly from the corner of his eye as they walked, always uneasy around the strange mage. He just always seemed off; extremely intense even though his mannerisms were that of an easy-going person. His eyes were always so focused in, as if he never just gave partial attention to anything. Every so often he felt those murky burgundy eyes boring into him and it made his skin prickle. It was like he was always in a state of hyperfocus.

"You don't like me much, do you?" his voice cut into Gajeel's thoughts and he widened his eyes in surprise.

"Eh?" he glanced over at him and noticed immediately that his eyes were glowing green. So his magic definitely had something to do with his eyes, then, "What makes ya say that?"

"I can see it," he grinned manically and Gajeel felt his heart jump a few paces, as if he needed to be ready to fight, "I make you nervous."

"You stare a lot," he replied gruffly and flinched when Bickslow started laughing again, much more heartily this time and with less menace. Gajeel glanced at his cigarette wondered in hindsight if he should have just brought the whole pack after all. But then, at the time he'd had no way of knowing Bickslow would be coming with him.

Bickslow smiled wide enough that Gajeel could make out the guildmark on his tongue, "Human Possession lets me see souls. Yours turns a darker color than usual when I'm around."

"I thought there was something weird about you," he muttered, "Darker than usual?"

"You got a lot going on," he was staring again and his eyes were shining severely. Gajeel gritted his teeth, not happy in the least that someone could see through him like that. He smirked, "Don't worry, I don't talk about everything I'd see."

"That's… great…" Gajeel stuffed his hands into his pockets, regretting inviting him along.

They were silent for a while as they walked, Gajeel quietly wondering what it meant that his soul was dark and Bickslow watching him. He wanted to say something to alleviate his worries. Usually souls reflected most prominently the general mood of a person. Seeing souls wasn't like reading minds but it was enlightening. Bickslow had never been good with people. He was too wired, too frenetic. His soul was bright and raging and it stood out from the people around him whose tended to be more reserved. Even during Laxus's wilder days he wasn't quite so hyperactive. When he gazed at Gajeel, though, what he saw was tumultuous in the least. It was like a shaken-up hornet's nest, bristly and angry and dark. He had a lot of negative energy and even more so now that Bickslow had told him about his ability. When Laxus was near it was quite interesting to watch. It was like he was trying to be happy but couldn't entirely convince himself it was ok.

It was… better? No… it was different, he concluded, then how it looked when he'd first joined Fairy Tail. He had expected a wild ride from the ex-villain. He was certain that he'd double-cross them or maybe even try to tear them apart from the inside. It had been an interesting surprise when that wasn't the case. He hadn't thought they'd get much resistance out of the Iron Dragon when the Thunder God Tribe had decided to take down all of Fairy Tail, or maybe he'd even help to an extent. Actually, Gajeel had been quite the wildcard that day and his soul had never been so bright with determination. People finding their purpose was such an amazing thing to watch. Now, though, he was merely a shadow of that person. He'd been beaten down and it was a sour thing to see, but Bickslow hardly knew him so it was sort of out of the question to make mention about it. With Laxus involved, though, he felt a bit of obligation. He made the Thunder God extremely happy to the point his soul visibly changed whenever he was around Gajeel. That wasn't something he saw every day.

One of his babies dipped down to rest on his shoulder, a reassuring gesture. He blinked and turned his gaze away from the brooding Iron Mage. He supposed it wouldn't hurt to give it a shot.

"So… you're doing a better, yeah?" it sounded awkward but it was a start and Gajeel's eyes widened a little bit at his words.

"I guess so," his soul started swarming and he took a deep dreg of his cigarette and settled. Bickslow noticed he was still holding his breath. The white smoke slunk slowly from his nostrils for a few seconds before he finally let it all out. He wrinkled his nose.

"You should open up a little, friend. It's good for you," Gajeel glanced over at him, his eyes looking like some sort of wild cat's.

"No offense but we ain't exactly close," he muttered and Bickslow laughed.

"What do you mean?" he put his arm around Gajeel's shoulders, causing the shorter man to tense up, "You my best friend's boyfriend, you gotta get used to me at some point, yeah?"

Gajeel gritted his teeth and hissed, "We ain't boyfriends… and we're in public."

"Then we can go back to your place, we haven't gone that far," his babies joined in, circling around their heads and laughing.

Gajeel tried to break away from him but Bickslow had him in a strong hold and was already turning around. He shuffled along with him, shoving his arm off and almost eating the rest of his cigarette. He threw the rest of it on the ground and smothered it under his boot, not wanting the smell to be on him in the house. He felt like a raging ball of nerves walking with Bickslow. His eyes were no longer glowing but they were definitely still wild. He didn't want to talk to this guy about what happened. He was such a freak. But when he thought about it a little more rationally he supposed there wasn't many people he was going to talk to about it. He'd already said he didn't tell people about what he saw when he looked at souls and it was apparent that the things he'd seen he hadn't said anything to Laxus about. Maybe he wasn't the worst person to confide in.

Why did everyone insist on trying to get him to talk about what happened? Why couldn't he just bury and let it die? Juvia, Laxus, Lily, Wendy, and now even Bickslow of all people? He didn't _need_ to talk about it. He needed to forget. He just wanted what had happened out of his life. But Bickslow already had him back at home and was rummaging through their fridge for something to drink, reemerging with a couple of bottles from the night before and falling into the couch in a heap, his babies following him. That he _definitely_ couldn't do. He wasn't going to spill with those things watching him. Gajeel took the bottle he'd held out to him but didn't move, didn't sit down, just sort of stood there… staring.

"Babies," Bickslow must have read his apprehension and made a motion towards the kitchen. They all giggled and fluttered away, whispering to themselves as they went. It made his blood chill a little. They were all actual souls, after all, and he could manipulate them as he pleased. It was intimidating to say the least.

Gajeel stared at him for a moment and tried to work up the courage to start…

He quickly abandoned it, "I need another cigarette."

"No you don't," he grinned, that crazed look in his eyes again, "That shit smells anyway."

"I don't know what you want me to say," for lack of anything better to do, Gajeel slumped into the chair across from him, "This bitch got her hands on me, I killed her, I left. What is there to say?"

"You _killed_ her," his eyes widened, a strange excitement shining up at him, "Shit… and Laxus was there?"

"I… yeah…" his heart shuttered, "He was."

"I'm surprised. Ever since he tried to use Fairy Law he's been real straight-laced about that kind of thing,"

"He didn't…" he felt like his hands were getting warm and he tugged at his gloves. His palms were sweating, "He was bleeding out. There wasn't a lot he could do about it."

His eyes widened even further, the excitement suddenly receding. He looked like some of the guys he used to know at Phantom, the type that got their hands on someone and lost it. He was sure that Laxus wouldn't have someone like that as part of his team, though. Someone who blacked out and caused damage like that usually didn't work well in groups, especially one where their leader had a strict set of values.

"She must have been a pretty bad person,"

"She had it coming," he felt a pang of rage suddenly strike in his chest. Bickslow raised and eyebrow at him and it looked like the symbol in the middle of his face was waving.

"What'd she do?" he prodded him gently, stoking the fire that would get him to talk. Gajeel didn't even really notice it. He was already starting to remember and it made his fists start to shake.

"She kidnaps kids and sells them to the highest bidder,"

"Why did she want you?" Bickslow had an intense look on his face again and his eyes were locked with Gajeel's. His eyes were starting to glow green again and he suddenly felt like he was being pinned down by his gaze. His heart started beating faster. Was he… using magic?

"I…" he felt compelled to answer. It wasn't something he'd ever talked to anyone about that wasn't another Dragon Slayer or Juvia. He hesitated but Bickslow's eyes were boring into him, rooting him in his chair. He swallowed audibly, "I have venom… that she wanted to use to make a drug…"

"A drug?" he leaned back into the sofa. He was a massive man, probably even taller than Laxus. With his legs outstretched he looked like he took up half of the couch. If they were chest to chest he'd probably tower over Gajeel by almost a head, "Was she able to make it?"

"No… it degrades when exposed to oxygen," he'd heard one of the doctors saying that to Bianca during one of the few instances he was coherent. It was why she had been so angry and why she needed him to bite someone, so it could mix with the blood and she could draw it out that way.

"What are you so afraid of?" Bickslow's words were like commands, anchoring him down into his chair. He felt like he was becoming stone where he sat, unable to move except when Bickslow asked him a question. His heart was racing and he could feel his hands starting to tremble.

"I'm not…" Bickslow's eyes glowed more intensely and he felt the words suddenly tumble from his lips, "I can't be that weak again..."

"Did she make you weak?"

"I… no… yes…" he was getting confused. What kind of question was that? How was he supposed to answer?

"What did she do to you?"

He felt like he'd just been sealed into a coffin. He had to say it, didn't he? With those glowing green eyes tearing a hole through his chest he had to say it all out loud? He felt dread suddenly settle in his gut as he was made to remember. He dug his nails into the arms of his chair and tried to slow his erratic breathing. Was he starting to have a panic attack?

It was such a visceral image, still alive and real in his mind. He was shaking, his body and mind trapped in the dark. He could hear someone yelling in the next room over. It was a kid and they were calling for help, to be let out, they couldn't do what was expected of them. He heard the clamor of someone in the room, his ears so much more sensitive when he wasn't allowed to see. They were walking towards him and he couldn't move, their heels were clicking against the floor. It was _her_. It had to be. He couldn't smell her and he couldn't see her but he just knew. Her voice was like dark velvet in his ear and he felt her hands, light and lithe, sliding up the bare skin of his thigh.

"I'll give you a chance to let out all of your pent-up hatred for me," something wet glided across his neck and he let out a gasp, "I'll let you bite me…"

God, he was so hot. He was going to suffocate. He couldn't move, couldn't even try. They'd given him something but the sedative had worn off. He was just stuck motionless as her hands snaked their way across his body. He felt sick. Why was she touching him? Why couldn't she just leave him alone? She had taken off whatever was keeping him blindfolded and the glaring white light made him dizzy. He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to block out some of the offensive white. She gripped him and he felt the heat in his body screaming for his instincts to take action.

"Don't fucking touch me," the words had to be forced out of him, it was so difficult to move his lips. Fire was burning him alive and she grinned at him as she worked him, a smug expression in her eyes whenever he couldn't hold back his strangled moan.

"Didn't I tell you we had ways of breaking people here?" her voice was low and menacing and it made his stomach sink, "Do you think you're better because you're a man? Do you think that a sweet, loving woman couldn't do something like this to you?"

He wanted to lash out at her but his arms still wouldn't move. His mind was swimming. Why? Why did his body have to react like this? Why was he still in heat? He couldn't move, couldn't stop her. He was helpless; tethered down like some sort of lunatic at the operating table. _Why? WHY? WHY WAS HE SO USELESS?_

"Miss Bianca…" the voice was distant, "We need to administer the dose."

Maybe she didn't hear them or maybe she didn't care. Her eyes were locked with his and she didn't stop what she was doing. In his mind he begged her to just let him go already. Didn't she hear her lacky? They needed to drug him again… please just go ahead and drag him forcibly from this hellish nightmare…

"When will you understand, Dragon Slayer," she smiled like a snake, all sharp teeth and black tongue, "I can do whatever I want to you. I can make you beg like the desperate little boy. I can make you want this, make you moan and cry like the bitch in heat that you are…"

His body was starting to shudder and it made him want to vomit. He'd never hated his body so much in his life. He didn't want this, dammit! He didn't enjoy this! He clenched his fists. _He didn't want this… He didn't…_

"I'll let you cum as long as you bite me," she was so close but he refused to open his eyes and see her. He could taste the venom in his mouth. It was sour on the tongue and slipped like blood down his esophagus. It was instinctual, another part of his body reacting to what was happening. He caught a whine in his throat when he felt her hand at his neck, trying to coax his mouth open and make it all the easier for him to lose his grip on himself.

But he couldn't. He _wouldn't_. He may not have control over all of his body but he knew to keep his mouth clamped shut. He couldn't allow her what she wanted no matter how much his body was telling him he needed to. If he did, what had happened to Juvia, what had happened to him, would happen to whoever she could get her hands on. He couldn't be the engine that powered her machine. No… not ever.

Gajeel suddenly felt something familiar itching at him, something quiet that he'd kept locked up for a long, long time. He would be whatever he needed to be to make sure she didn't have her way. It didn't matter to him what that meant. Actually, he changed his mind. He wanted to let this happen; wanted her to stoke the flame of hate that was boiling him alive. The heat wasn't just for lust, it was also for rage.

He forced his eyes open and glared at her. She didn't look like a snake any more, but a woman. No, not a woman, a person. A person he could kill. A person he _wanted_ to kill.

If he could clench his fists, then he could move. If he could move, he could break out of the cloth straps they had him tethered down with. With everything he could muster he snapped free. Alarm filled her eyes and he lashed out and grabbed her arm, pulling her down and slamming her against the table. She pulled as hard as she could from him and screamed in pain from his harsh grasp. He heard the clamor of reaction, people were coming to stop him from hurting her. There wasn't much he could do but he could make a point.

He dragged her down to his level, his arms shaking and fiery hatred making him wish his other arm was free, "Tell me to bite ya again…" he growled and saw a touch of terror in her eyes, "…and I'm going to rip yer throat out,"

She tried to pull away from him but he wouldn't release her. He felt the pain in his arm from a needle but he still didn't move. She was flailing her free arm wildly, searching for something. He felt the pain lance through his thigh and sear down his leg. He'd screamed but not much had been able to come out, his voice was already mostly spent. There was rushing around the white room and Bianca was screaming.

"You think you can try and threaten me?! Do you think you're not disposable like everyone else here?!"

He didn't really remember much after that, just that finally his skin wasn't on fire anymore. Maybe that was because the warmth was seeping from his body onto the table, dripping on the floor… He remembered thinking that he was so ready to die… He wondered what Laxus would think of him when he found out.

He was shaking in his seat, his eyes unfocused and his face wet. Was he crying? Had he been crying? There were hands on his shoulders and he didn't feel like stone anymore but he didn't trust himself to move. Maroon eyes were locking him in place and he was trying to recognize the man who was standing in front of him.

"Let it go, man, you're alright,"

"What… did… _what did you do to me_?" Gajeel raged but the violent shaking in his limbs stopped him from lashing out.

"I just got you talking," he replied softly, smoothly, like he was talking to a wild animal, "That's all."

"You… I…" his breathing was slowly starting to calm down, the adrenaline subsiding, "That was hell."

"Yeah… but it needed to happen," Bickslow's voice didn't waver and he had a soft, easy look in his eyes, "You got it out of your system… good job."

"You're patronizing me," he growled and Bickslow just slowly shook his head.

"It sucks, but you have to feel this way," he never moved his hands from Gajeel's shoulders, "Are you scared?"

"No… I'm pissed!" he still couldn't move and he was suddenly aware of the green glow that was back in his eyes, "Don't do that to me again!"

"Calm down, I'm helping you," he finally let go of his shoulders and squatted down in front of him. He was so tall that even down like that he wasn't so much shorter than Gajeel in the chair, "You're not helpless, right? You're talking to me. You can tell me to stop."

"You won't listen," Gajeel stated hotly and Bickslow just grinned.

"You weren't helpless on the table, right?"

"What?" he eyed him suspiciously, "Of course I was… didn't you listen to what I…?"

"But you got out, right? You got angry enough to get free," he was still so calm, leveling with Gajeel in a simple, logical way, "And if you wanted, you can get angry enough and make me stop… but you're not, because you need to work through this, right?"

"Bickslow… I swear to Mavis herself…"

"You don't need to bring her into this," his smile lost a little of its edge as he focused on his magic again, "So, now what are we afraid of? We're not helpless anymore, so what else is making you upset?"

Gajeel felt violated but what was he supposed to do?

"I… I don't want to go into heat again…" he was turning to stone again, his veins were icing over, "Because… if it happens again…"

"It's a cycle, right?" he explained simply, "It's not something to be feared… it's natural… for you anyway."

Gajeel felt like his chest was heavy. He didn't want to talk about this anymore, he didn't want to feel. He _needed_ this? He felt like he was going to die…

"What does it feel like?" Bickslow's grin finally vanished, "Describe it to me."

"I… I don't…" those eyes were piercing through him, driving him to speak. It was so intense, he wanted it to just end already, "It's… it's hot… and it feels like your skin is crawling…"

He could feel his skin starting to prickle. It started at his knees and travelled like a microscopic army up his legs, his navel, and chest. A shiver was trying to work its way down his spine. He felt warm, like the room was suddenly one hundred degrees.

"Bickslow… stop it!" he snapped, his heart was racing in his ribcage and his breathing starting to become erratic.

"I'm not doing anything," he didn't seem perturbed in the slightest. He was completely and agitating tranquil, "What you're feeling isn't real."

"I know that!" he growled, "But that doesn't mean it's not there!"

"But it's not what you think it is. Your adrenaline is pumping because you're working yourself up," it was immensely annoying how easy he was explaining this to him. Gajeel wanted to punch him, "Center yourself. You're not in heat. You're not helpless. You're not weak. You're at home, sitting in your chair, hanging out with one of your boyfriend's friends."

"He's not my boyfriend," Gajeel hissed. He was calming down; the feeling was passing. It was just his adrenaline, after all. He was fine and there was nothing worth freaking out about. He was fine. He was _actually_ fine.

"Your unofficial boyfriend," Bickslow rolled his eyes and it broke the connection. Finally completely free of Bickslow's manipulative gaze, he brought his hand around and with as much force as he could he punched him in the face. He clattered to the ground in a heap, clutching his nose as blood gushed from his fingers. Gajeel stood, extremely fed up and extremely tired, but also more at peace than he'd felt in ages. Despite himself, he reached a hand down to the navy-haired mage.

"Feel better?" he muttered through the blood that was trickling down his chin.

Gajeel smirked at him, not afraid to show his teeth to the most infuriating member of the Thunder God Tribe, "Immensely."


	40. Chapter 40

Chapter 40:

Gajeel finished packing the rest of his belongings for the weekend and shouldered his bag. His stomach and mind were buzzing. He started to head for his bedroom door when he glanced his reflection in the mirror and stopped, checking himself over. He'd opted for a short-sleeved shirt despite the chill, already knowing what was in store for the day would have him shedding anything heavier, and some baggy pants tucked into his rugged hiking boots. He mussed his hair, tried to put it into some sort of normal style, huffed, and abandoned the hope that he'd be capable of looking halfway decent.

He trotted down the stairs and into the fall air. The walk to the guild seemed longer than usual and he felt like every stranger on the street was staring at him as if they knew where he was going and who with. It was odd. He didn't know if this was a good feeling or not. He kept swinging back and forth between anxious knots in his stomach to nervous shudders of his heart. What was this strangeness? He was antsy to be at their destination but also didn't want to leave the comfort of his home. His thoughts were flittering around in his mind like moths caught in a jar. He didn't like it but also didn't mind it; this was a gentle nuisance but an insistent one.

He sauntered up to the guild, took in a deep breath and pulled open the door. He wanted to walk proudly, as if he didn't feel like five thousand tiny butterflies were trying to flutter their way from his stomach to his ribcage. He felt like everyone could see the apprehensive excitement in his eyes. He was an open book that desperately wanted to be closed but had something inside him that was far too alive to be contained. He spotted the object of his barely-bridled frisson leaning against the bar, pack sitting at his feet, listening quietly as Freed and Bickslow bickered back and forth.

The bored expression on his face suddenly shattered at the sound of the door closing and his molten gold eyes darted in his direction; a sobering amount of contented calm settled there as they waited for him. Gajeel felt the jittering in his gut diminish slightly at seeing him there waiting, almost as if he'd secretly doubted that Laxus would actually be there. He'd dressed down per Gajeel's request and sported a tight, long-sleeved shirt that accentuated his toned form. He was a striking man looking down on the world like the god he was always meant to be. Gajeel felt like he was walking into his shadow as he approached and refused to notice the stares of the two men at the bar.

"You ready?" he pushed his fist into his pocket and looked up at him, hating that he was so damn tall.

"Yeah," a smile tugged at the corner of his lip and it made his scar twitch slightly.

"And where are you two off to?" Freed leaned back in his seat to look around Bickslow and Gajeel felt bashful heat threatening to creep from his collar. Freed had a knowing look on his face and it took everything in him to keep a straight face, "Going on a mission?"

"If I told you," he forced out, already aware by just his expression that Laxus had told him exactly what they were planning on doing, "I'd have to kill you."

"He's not kidding around, either," Bickslow smirked over at the emerald-headed man. No doubt his eyes were still black from where Gajeel had hit him, although it was impossible to tell since he was wearing his helmet. His babies twittered around his head, "That iron fist is no joke."

Gajeel felt his lip tugging up in a snarl but before he could snap about Bickslow's terrifying talent Laxus was picking up his pack and throwing it over his shoulder, bidding a mild farewell to his friends and stepping towards the door. His brilliant eyes had a touch of eagerness in them and the smallest of smiles played on his pale lips. Gajeel felt like any fire he could have had was just blown out by the gust of a cool sea wind. His heart missed a pace as he walked away.

What was wrong with him?

He still could hardly believe they were actually doing this. His mind was reeling again; frazzled as an intimidated denial started building in his chest. Laxus strode with confidence in his step. His commanding pride exuded from his pores and people stared at it, basked in his mighty aura. It was no wonder he had such an ego. He was powerful and strong; a thundering giant claiming the earth beneath his feet. Gajeel was just… himself. He walked in the shadows of the trees at Laxus's feet. He'd never measure up to that kind of man. Could he really think of walking beside him? Surely with his shorter gait he'd be left in his dust to choke in the valleys of his footprints. How long would it be before Laxus lost whatever bizarre interest he had in him? What would happen if he got too attached? How quickly would he implode this time? What if this was too fast or too much? He was falling backwards in his own mind. His familiar self-loathing was opening its maws to swallow him whole and leave him in his own darkness. He'd been letting himself get far too lost in his own thoughts, after all…

Gajeel blinked, breaking his unabashed stare.

A gentle push of knuckles on his shoulder brought his attention to Bickslow who was facing down at the bar. His eyes were still covered although Gajeel was sure if they weren't he'd see maroon eyes peeking up to stare a hole through his chest, "You worry too much."

Freed was watching him quizzically and he could see the question in his eyes. Why the hesitance?

"You should mind your own business," he muttered, feeling as though his heart was beating just a touch too hard and sung too loudly in his ears. Why was he becoming so obsessed? When did he start getting so worried about what Laxus thought of him or how they looked when they walked together? It was so trivial, so silly. He'd never been worried about things so small before. Maybe there truly was something wrong with him. When would Laxus catch on, he wondered. When would he find that it was too bothersome to deal with?

"Oi," Laxus was at the door to the guild, his brow raised as he waited, "You just staying here, then?"

He clicked his teeth and smirked, his best display of confidence. People were staring, wondering why they were leaving together and where they were going. It was eating at him as he walked past questioning eyes. When were they going to start telling people? When was this going to be public knowledge? If their guildmates thought poorly of them for this, then what? Would Laxus abandon him then? His veins iced over a little. Makarov… eventually they'd have to tell Makarov. How did _he_ feel about his only grandson dating another man? A man that had once destroyed the guild, at that?

The doors closed solidly behind them and Gajeel felt as if that meant he could no longer turn back. He was alone with Laxus from here on out. It was just him, the blonde and the fall leaves that were fluttering in droves to the barren earth floor. When it was just the two of them, though, he felt like Laxus wasn't so tall, wasn't so proud, wasn't so great. He wasn't a god, he was a human. He glanced down at Gajeel and his eyes reflected the humor of the late-blooming goldenrods that dotted the roadside. Gajeel's heartrate quickened; they really were brilliant.

"You looked like you were chickening out for a minute," he rumbled, his eyes lighting on fire whenever they were struck by the early-morning sun that had still only creeped to the thinning treetops.

"Tch," Gajeel kept his hands in his pocket, feeling as if hiding them could help him conceal the anxiety that was still tangling his insides, "I was just thinking about what I'm going to do to you later."

His smile was filled with mischief and he leaned a bit closer to the raven before he spoke, dropping his voice to a dangerous level, "I thought that was my job?"

Gajeel's blood spiked. He didn't answer, just fidgeting with the strap on his pack. Laxus didn't even notice Gajeel's sudden aloofness. He felt as high and whimsical as the cool breeze rushing through the treetops. He didn't feel their silence was stiff or awkward but companionable and intimate; they were just two people contented to exist in each other's presence. He was blissful and optimistic. This was going to be a step they were taking together and he was sure it would be a positive one if only he could keep Gajeel's spirits in tune with his own. He was determined that nothing would get in the way of them finally shaking off the rest of their reservations.

They took a train to a small town called Edelweiss that Laxus had only heard of in magazines and unassuming travel pamphlets. It was an old mining town now turned into a tourist attraction after the mines were shut down and attention was turned to the several hot springs in the area to keep their frail economy going. At the higher altitude, the temperature was even lower and when they first stepped into the crisp air Laxus wondered if he should have unpacked his jacket after all. Gajeel didn't give him time to retrieve it, though, and as soon as they unloaded took thier bags and paid a gofer to take them to their hotel. Laxus just smirked at him, wondering if the big secret was a little over the top at this point.

From the station, Gajeel took him through the cobblestone streets with a muted look of wonder in his gaze. The town was nestled at the bottom of a valley and surrounded on all sides by four towering mountains, looking as if it had been trapped in time in the middle of the silver rush some fifty years ago. Gajeel had mentioned that he'd been to this place before and it was clear to Laxus as to why he'd been so delighted with it. Mock gas lights stood every ten feet on the sidewalks and the shops were all themed in the same style as they were when first built over a hundred years ago. Although some sold tacky gemstones and replicas of miner's outfits or other cheesy souvenirs, many of them retained their dignity and function. Shoe shops were sporting signs bearing the names of fathers and sons and taverns opened with half, duel-swinging doors and haughty laughter tumbling from their entrances. Laxus felt as if the whole place should have been dipped in bronze and kept in the old shows that Gramps used to watch when he was a kid, the kind with cowboys and rough living. It was charming and breathtakingly beautiful as everywhere they looked they could see the colors of fall stretching up like brilliant orange and red walls around them.

They approached a building towards the edge of town and Laxus could see Gajeel getting visibly excited. His eyes were lit up and he was stepping a little faster than before. Laxus didn't really understand why; he hadn't yet been told what exactly it was that Gajeel had planned for them. All he knew was that the sun was peeking just over the top of the mountains and cast everything in an orange light, striking Gajeel's ruby eyes and making them seem to radiate with incredible warmth. He tore his eyes away from them in an effort to keep from staring. Finally, Laxus could make out the words on the sign and he quirked up an eyebrow at the raven curiously.

"We're going horseback riding?" he asked, crossing his arms as they walked.

He grinned up at the blonde, "That's just part one,"

"Part one? And what's part two?" he smirked back at him and noticed the grin on his face get a bit more wicked. He didn't say a word, just pointed up the shadow of the mountain they were nearest. It was to the north and so half of it was brilliantly lit while the other was wrapped in ominous shadow. As Laxus looked closer at it, he could see a clearly marked path snaking up the face, dotting in and out of trees until it neared the peak. The higher you looked the steeper the face until finally the trees gave way to reddish-brown craggy rock. Laxus felt his stomach turn in apprehension.

"It's three or four hours' hike, depending on where you want to stop," Gajeel grinned, "We're going to try and make it all the way up."

"I was worried you'd say that," Laxus bit the inside of his cheek nervously.

"Don't worry, we're going with a group," Gajeel snickered, "They'll take it easier on you than I would have."

"How kind of you," he murmured, lacking his fervor from earlier that day.

"We're facing fears, remember?" Gajeel sighed cheekily, lacing his fingers together behind his head and gazing up at the mountain. Laxus could tell he was excited and didn't want to impede his good mood in any way. So, for Gajeel's sake, he steeled himself and put his arm over his shoulder, making the shorter man stiffen.

"You're right," Laxus leaned close to him as he dropped his arms, looking up at Laxus quizzically for the sudden change in mood. His voice was a gentle rumble like distant thunder, "I'm in your hands."

Gajeel's eyes widened and he felt as if the Thunder God had just struck him with lightning from the heavens. His heart was suddenly racing and he stopped, fighting the hungry feeling that had just flared up in his chest and pit of his stomach. Laxus just walked ahead as if he hadn't just carelessly lit the kerosene in Gajeel's veins, golden eyes glancing back roguishly as he expected him to follow. Gajeel clicked his teeth, easily seeing how pleased the blonde was with himself.

"Mavis's sakes…" Gajeel breathed, running his tongue against his teeth as he hurried to catch up.

They were grouped in with eleven others and matched up with horses based on their experience and height. Laxus had only been riding on a couple of occasions and never seriously, so the lead paired him with an older mare with a broad chest, chocolate brown coat and flaxen main and tail. She was gentle and patient as Laxus pulled himself atop her back, taking a couple steps to ensure her sure footing before settling beneath him. Gajeel walked up to a gelding with a shimmering black coat and main. It had strong legs and as Gajeel approached it lifted its head to watch him and sniffed at him, bumping his shoulder with its nose. Gajeel talked smoothly and kindly, patting his shoulder before gripping onto the horn of the saddle and pulling himself up. Laxus was sort of envious. Gajeel was just so sleek and athletic. He felt like some sort of clunky, blundering giant in comparison.

Laxus's mare took him out of the stable and into the clearing, well-trained to wait for instruction after getting situated with her new rider. Gajeel trotted up beside him, his horse seemingly far more spirited than his own. Laxus smiled over at him. He wasn't sure he'd seen Gajeel look so genuinely happy before, or maybe he had and it was just outshined by this moment. He grinned over at Laxus, one gloved hand holding the reins and the other resting on his hip. All he was missing was a cowboy hat and boots to compliment his cocky attitude.

"I'm finally taller than ya, Sparky," his smile was so wide Laxus could see his canines glinting back at him.

"This must be a big moment for you," Laxus teased, leaning towards him as far as he dared without losing his balance, "Congrats,"

"Not everyone can be as freakishly tall as you," he quipped back, tossing his head back in mock indignation, "Just try not to eat my dust on the way up."

"I don't think this is a race," Laxus snickered as they directed their horses towards where their guide was rallying everyone together.

"Not yet," Gajeel replied playfully.

Despite his words, the two stayed beside each other on the way up the mountainside. Laxus's thighs felt tighter the further they went. He wasn't used to having to sit on a horse and the wide spread of his legs was taxing at times. Their guide gave them brief instructions on how to handle going up and down hills on their horses and how to best keep their balance, pointing out warning signs to agitation and fatigue and answering questions along the way.

He droned on about the silver mines, some of the shafts still left uncovered deep in the woods because of their remote nature. Gajeel, it seemed, didn't much care for the history of the land and was more just enjoying himself at his side, eyes forward and a gently, appreciative smile stuck to his face the entire time. Occasionally they'd come across tracks in the woods and cement bases of what used to be watchtowers. The trees were thick here at the base of the mountain where dense and the century old oak and spruce branches blocked the midmorning sun from their trail. The smells of the trees and horses overruled his senses and the chilled air and speckled sunshine patterning the ground made him feel serene.

It took two hours before the trails were finally too steep for their horses and they came to a small area where they could dismount and a hand would watch their horses, garbed in traditional wear from the mining age as if they were all headed up to the purest silver line to work for the day. They rested for a half hour or so before their guide marshalled them up towards the path to work their way up the mountain. Laxus could see the rock face up ahead with much more detail than before. Mixed in with the tones of russet and chestnut he could now see splotches of grey tarnishing the cliff side. The trees were starting to thin as seeds found it harder and harder to find purchase on the rockier ground. The smell of earth calmed him despite the apprehension that had started gnawing at him as they approached their ultimate goal. He could see it now, the black rope that spindled its way up the rock. They'd be harnessed in and made to climb the rest of the way to the precipice.

He shivered, telling himself it was just the chill in the air that caused his skin to prickle although he couldn't rationalize away the sweat on his palms. Gajeel struck on ahead of him, climbing the rugged trail with a fervor Laxus just couldn't muster. From behind, though, he could see his muscles ripple below his black shirt. He tried to use that at his motivation to keep pace but the farther up they got the harder it was to concentrate on anything aside from the loose gravel beneath his feet.

"Alright," their guide sighed as they came to the point where the cliff jutted up from the mountainside at a steep, almost 90-degree angle, "Those of you who are going back down will come with me. Everyone who's climbing to the top, Travis is going to take over."

As Laxus approached, he saw Gajeel with his arms crossed staring up at their next obstacle. His eyes were picking their way up the face but quickly turned their attention to Laxus as he got close. He grinned.

"Have you looked down yet?"

"I'm refusing to," Laxus replied as stoically as possible, although just thinking about it was making his stomach roll.

"Gihi… that's no good. How are you supposed to face yer fears if you don't actually face them?" his red eyes were wild as he spoke and Laxus sighed in defeat.

"You're not seriously making me do this, are you?" he grumbled, crossing his arms and eyeing the rock, "This is insane… we'll fall and die."

"Don't worry, Sparky," Gajeel winked at him at it caught him a little off guard, "I'll catch ya."

Laxus was silent for a moment, "If I look down now you might not be able to convince me to keep going."

Gajeel smirked and Laxus figured he was going to make another sarcastic comment so he just walked past him towards the man who was hooking people up to harnesses. To his surprise, he felt a hand smooth against the small of his back and he stopped to glance back at Gajeel. His smile was less cunning and he seemed genuine.

"They test these things every day. You're safe," he ran his hand up and patted his shoulder blade before finally breaking his touch, "You got this, Sparky."

Laxus blinked, feeling as if where Gajeel's hand had been had set off some sort of reaction on his flesh to make it tingle, "…yeah…"

Their party was drastically smaller now. Where there used to be eleven there were now only five including their new guide. There were six lines up to the height and Travis situated himself in the middle with Laxus flanking him to the right and Gajeel after him and then their two companions to his left. Gajeel was the first to have his harness on and was quick to help Laxus with his, adjusting the straps so that they were snug at his thighs and hips and making an offhanded comment about him needing not to get too excited while he was down there. Laxus wished he could have bantered back with him but he was too nervous. He felt shaky and his heart was fluttering so fast he was worried it might just jump out of his chest. Gajeel stared at him hard for a moment.

"If this is too much…" he started but Laxus shook his head.

"Just remember, you said you'd catch me," he tried to smile past his nervousness, "So if I die, I'm haunting your ass."

Gajeel smiled, "Of course."

They clipped themselves to the line and Travis yelled some instructions to them before putting his hands to the stone and pulling himself up. Gajeel followed suit and gripped the hard brown and grey and hefted himself up as well. Laxus took a steadying breath. He could do this. He reached as far up as he could and got a good grip and pushed his boot against the rock. Taking a breath he pulled himself off of the ground. One step, then another, and he pushed himself up, clinging to the cold stone as he continued his accent. He tried not to look down, to focus his attention up, but occasionally he'd have to glance down to ensure he'd find his footing and each time he'd catch sight of just how high he was. He gripped at the rock tighter, each time wishing he had a better hold.

Gajeel was at his side, though, and kept pace with him even though Laxus was sure he could rocket ahead if he wanted. As with everything he did, he was smooth and strong as he stole himself up the cliff; a flawless picture of power and finesse. His movements were graceful and strong and he didn't seem perturbed in the slightest with the height. Sweat was starting to bead at his neck and he would occasionally cast his eyes over to Laxus and check how he was doing. He appreciated it. His heart was still pounding in his ears and the fatigue in his limbs was making him feel all the more frantic to get to the top. Did no one worry what would happen if their strength suddenly gave out and they fell? Sure, the line would catch but what if he was too heavy? How much weight could these anchors hold?

"Sparky," Gajeel's voice caught his attention and he tried to center himself again and gaze over at him. He had an easy smile, "Yer almost there."

"Great…" his voice was shaky but he didn't really care. He was just thankful that he was almost to the top. He looked up and could see the next attendant waiting to help pull him over the edge. He'd never been so happy to see a pair of hands reaching down for him. One more good push and he caught hold of them and they helped him up.

Cresting the top of the mountain was the greatest thing he'd ever done. He felt relief wash over him and allowed himself to feel the shakiness in his arms and legs and appreciate the workout he'd just put himself through. He was breathing heavily, focusing on his knees on the ground when he felt a rough hand on his shoulder. He glanced up at Gajeel, red eyes eager and a proud look he'd never seen before on his face. His smile was wide again and his sharp teeth pointed at him.

"You did it," he beamed, "And I didn't even have to catch you."

Laxus's heart was beating fast again but this time it wasn't in fear or anxiety, "Yeah… I did."

He took his hand and stood, looking up at the last bit until they made it to the top. From here he could glimpse just how high they were and his nervousness came back with a vengeance. They were higher than some of the low-hanging autumn clouds and they were spilling over the mountains around them like the waves of a waterfall. Gajeel didn't release his hold on him, though, and tugged Laxus along after him to the peak. It was just another ten or fifteen feet higher but Laxus thought he was going to lose his stomach on the ground. He gritted his teeth as they waited their turn to finally be at the top as the two guys before them stood and looked over. Finally, Travis ushered them up and Gajeel led the way, his raven locks fluttering out behind him as the wind kicked up.

"C'mon Sparky. It's beautiful up here," he reached down again, this time so they could stand together at the summit. Laxus hesitated a moment but he'd made it so far there was really no way he couldn't meet Gajeel up there now. Digging his boots into the rock, he climbed up beside him and sucked in a breath.

He wasn't kidding, it was gorgeous.

The rock jutted out just a few feet so they could stand as if they were on a giant diving board on top of the world, ready to jump down. The blanket of trees looked like some sort of classic painting with only the town to break its endless rolls across the surrounding mountains and hills. Clouds tumbled into the valley as if trying to fill it like a massive bowl only to dissipate before they could get too dense. He could see the horizon broken by rolling hills in the distance. It was breathtaking and Laxus felt the need to etch the view in his mind and take it with him forever. He never wanted to forget a sight like this.

"Uh… Laxus…?" he felt Gajeel's hand brush his own and he glanced back to look at him. His iron studs sparkled in the afternoon light and his eyes were on fire.

"You were right, it's beautiful up here," he smiled at him. He looked awkward and Laxus noticed his other hand messing with something in his pocket. He shot him a curious looked, "What's wrong?"

Scarlet started to slowly creep up his cheeks, "Nothin' I just… uhh…" he pulled something from his pocket and held his closed fist out. Laxus cocked his eyebrow at him, "You uhh… said something about… going steady?"

His eyes widened as Gajeel pushed a small, dark grey ring into his hand. If his heart weren't about to jump out of his chest before, it definitely was now. His smile was so wide it was stupid and he watched Gajeel fumble with sliding a ring of his own on his right hand. His hands were trembling and for a minute he wondered if he'd drop the tiny trinket as he slid it past his knuckled to rest on his right ring finger. It fit, but of course knowing Gajeel he'd found some way to know Laxus's ring size. He couldn't help it, he laughed and leaned down to kiss Gajeel on the lips. The raven stiffened at first but gently kissed him back, fighting the heat that was now overtaking his neck and even the tips of his ears.

"Heheh… this… this is great…" he felt so dumb but he was so happy and so in awe with his surroundings and just baffled by the fact that Gajeel was going along with this and they were dating, _actually_ dating, now. Gajeel broke through his bashfulness with a smile and Laxus was gushing, "Thank you."

"You're welcome," Gajeel smiled up at him. For the life of him, Laxus wished he could snapshot this moment forever. He was so happy he thought that he might just float back down the side of the mountain.

The way down was fun now that Laxus's fears were completely abated. Their instructor demonstrated the correct way to repel down and for Gajeel and Laxus it was a playful race to see who'd get to the bottom first. Gajeel won just from the hesitation that Laxus still had when he first went to jump over the edge. It was another three hours before they were finally back into town and Laxus felt accomplished and tired. He was still elated, though, and when they were walking through the streets of quaint little Edelweiss Laxus found the confidence to reach out and brush Gajeel's hand. The raven looked at him inquiringly at first before realizing and timidly lacing his fingers with his.

Gajeel's hands were larger and rougher than what he was used to but it wasn't a bad thing. He could feel Gajeel's ring pressing into his finger and it made him smile. They stopped at one of the stands in the downtown area, buying just a cheap dinner and a few things to take back to the hotel, and heading to where they would retire for the night. Laxus's curiosity was piqued. Gajeel actually hadn't given them a single clue as to where they would be going. It was late in the evening at this point and the gas lamps were lit to stave off the early sunset caused by the surrounding mountains.

The place Gajeel took him to was quiet. Laxus didn't know if it was done purposefully or not, but surrounding the compound was a forest of bamboo. Maybe it was to make patrons feel calmer or maybe it was like a weed that couldn't be controlled, he wasn't sure, but they had to follow a narrow path back to a hut where Gajeel checked in. The attendant took his money and looked up his name, obviously giving Laxus a once over as he entered in Gajeel's information. Laxus felt a little self-conscious for it but Gajeel either didn't notice or chose not to address it.

Finally, after walking through more of the tall green, Gajeel pulled out the key to their suite. It was free-standing, not like the hotels Laxus was used to staying at. They wouldn't have any neighbors. Laxus raised an eyebrow. How much had all of this cost, he wondered?

Gajeel opened the door and stepped back, not making eye contact with Laxus as he strode in and looked around. He had to say he was impressed. It was no wonder the attendant had done a double-take at the two men; this was probably a honeymoon suite. Although there weren't rose petals covering the floor and bed, there _was_ a massive bed against the wall with a large mirror at its head. There was a kitchenette and a small living area, a large bathroom and vanity… it was almost like an apartment in size. But out of all of that, the most stunning part was the French doors that opened up to a small, bubbling hot spring surrounded by the forest of bamboo so thick that no one would be able to see through the stalks.

"Well… what do you think?" he heard Gajeel lock the door behind him as he came inside and his approach made a hungry excitement start to awaken inside of him.

"How the hell did you find a place like this?" Laxus looked over his shoulder at the raven. He crossed his arms and didn't even try to hide the smirk playing on his features.

"I've travelled a lot," was all Gajeel responded as he stuffed his hands into his pockets.

"You're actually kind of flashy, aren't you?" Laxus grinned and watched as scarlet started to light the tips of his ears on fire, "All this just for your first time?"

The red spread to his cheeks but he held his gaze and put on his most confident façade he could muster, "Tch, I'm worth it."

Laxus rolled his eyes but the Iron Dragon paid him no mind, instead unloading the food they'd bought while at the market. He heard the clinking of bottles and the rustling of bags as he made his way over to the massive bed. It smelled crisp and fresh and he hesitated for a moment as he watched himself in the massive mirror, anxious heat forcing itself into the hungry mix in his boiling in his chest. He hadn't expected something like that and he wasn't sure how keen either he or Gajeel would be looking at themselves while in the heat of the moment.

He glanced up at the reflection and watched Gajeel working, completely unaware of the blonde's gaze. The lights were dim and so his eyes flashed softly as he cast them to wherever his hands would be moving next. He felt a knot starting to tie up his insides. How awkward was this about to be? He'd met women for midnight rendezvous before and every once in a while, instead of just jumping into what they came for, there was an unbearable span of time where they had to just clumsily be in each other's company. Kissing was strained and uncomfortable, and touches were inelegant and forced. He was worried that their first few minutes would be similar and he was already dreading it. He didn't want any sort of negative stain to be left on their time together and so made up his mind that he would do whatever he could to keep it from happening.

He tore his gaze from the raven and dropped his eyes to himself again. Casually, he gripped the hem of his shirt and pulled it up over his head, momentarily getting caught in the dark fabric before freeing himself to the humid room. He balled it up and tossed it to the floor and calmly realized that the shuffling in the kitchenette had stopped. He glanced up to the mirror again and met glistening cinnabar irises watching him silently like a cat taking in quietly and cautiously an unknown creature. Laxus stepped back and leaned to glance over his shoulder at him, keeping his eyes as he unbuckled and pulled free his belt. Gajeel was the one who broke first, muttering something about cleaning up and shuffling with a clenched jaw to the bathroom. Laxus tried not to let it bother him as he stripped down to just his boxers, the sound of water in the sink abating his worries just slightly.

He cast his eyes to the French doors and eased them open. He was immediately greeted to a stronger heat and damp than what he'd become accustomed to in the suite. Even with the chill of the fall evening he didn't feel a need to cover himself. He noticed that there were a couple bamboo chairs sitting near the door with towels and robes stacked neatly in them. The floor looked to be wedged and sealed together, waxed over until they shone like glass in the light, and etched to form around the pool in a tight ten-foot circle. It was so smooth that the ground felt like polished marble beneath his feet. He finally shed the last of his clothing before taking a step into the near-scalding heat and sinking like a stone into the hot water. Everything in his body sighed with relief as the heat melted the stress from the day away and he waded in up to his waist, reclining on the seat that was chiseled out from the wall. He pressed his new ring to his lips and waited, watching the way the steam twisted and rolled into the chilly night sky.


	41. Chapter 41

Chapter 41:

Gajeel felt ridiculously stupid.

He was hiding in the bathroom like a child who'd committed some trivial offense and was avoiding the wrath of their parents. How could he help it? Laxus was just so damn intimidating. That was wrong, it wasn't Laxus that was intimidating; it was his own ruinous complex, his fear of intimacy that was getting in the way.

They'd had such a good day. Laxus had faced his fear easily and gracefully. He'd conquered it, had literally and figuratively trampled it beneath his feet. When they'd gotten to the peak, the look on his face was priceless. Gajeel had been stirred to find some way to make him look as awe-filled again, although he wasn't sure that would be possible. The best part of the day was when he'd placed the ring in his hand. As hasty and nervous as the action had been, Gajeel hadn't been able to help catching the same elation that had made Laxus shine like some sort of human incarnation of Apollo on top of the mountain. Laxus was actually a sincere, passionate man beneath his cool demeanor and Gajeel was learning about it more and more as they spent time alone together.

He peered out from the bathroom and caught a glimpse of the blonde as he stalked out to their personal spring. He took in a breath as if it would somehow fortify him and stepped back into the suite, silently berating himself for acting so childish. Honestly, what was the worst that could happen? There wasn't any way for him to mess this up more than any other time he'd ruined a hot moment between the two of them. The only difference this time was the expense. And, as he talked himself down, he told himself there was always tomorrow. If this turned out to be too much for him to handle they still had one more day that they'd be spending in each other's company. Maybe it wasn't just a fear of intimacy that was breaking apart his usually assertive and excitable façade, maybe it was also a fear of not living up to expectations or not being able to get over this.

He stepped quietly to the doors and watched Laxus as he tiptoed around the pool. Gajeel pressed his tongue against his teeth as he stared. He was just so _immaculate_. His porcelain skin looked soft in the pale moonlight despite being pulled taught against the strength of his body. The only dark mark on his body was the inky black of his tattoo that spindled down his chest and claimed his back. His brilliant eyes glinted in the night like raw gold and his scar had him seeming proud and almost divine. He was a seraphic warrior, the picture of power and fair virility. Gajeel was sure that out of the thousands of definitions of perfection there were in the world one of them had Laxus Dreyar as its description. He swallowed. When did he start thinking this way towards him, admiring every step he took? The feelings he had for him were raw and adoring and he was so easily swept away. He'd never felt that way towards someone. It was strange and new and a little frightening. He didn't get so attached to people who could leave…

He clenched his jaw, scoffed at himself, and ran his fingers through his hair. He needed to stop this habit of getting lost in his own mind. It was going to start dominating his life.

He finally gathered the courage to first pull the shirt from his shoulders and then wrestle himself out of his pants. He didn't toss them into a heap out of the way like Laxus had and instead just left them in the middle of the floor. He treaded lightly out to the spring, allowing a shiver to work its way through his body as he adjusted to the change in temperature. Laxus didn't look at him as he, too, shed the last of his clothing and even kept his gaze upwards towards the night sky as he sank into the hot water. Gajeel sort of appreciated the thoughtfulness on his part. Quietly, he waded over to sit near his partner and spread out his arms around the lip of the stone basin. He was just far enough that if he stretched out his fingertips could brush the blonde's shoulder.

"So… you have a good day?" Gajeel prompted, leaning his cheek onto his knuckles as he gazed over at the blonde.

"I did," Laxus smirked, not moving his hand from where it was resting lightly against his lips. Gajeel eyed the steel ring he'd given him and ran his thumb against his own. Laxus probably had no idea that he'd actually made them. It was just a silly little trinket but he'd figured it wouldn't hurt to have some outer display of their commitment to each other. Even when they went back to the guild he was fairly certain they wouldn't do much as far as holding hands or hugging or touching… or any of the sort of things couples tended to do. They just weren't really that kind of people, or at least he wasn't. So why not? Let them wear matching rings. He'd bear through the questions if any were asked.

"So… uh… when are you planning on telling Makarov?" he tore his gaze to the smoky water and focused on the shuddering shape of his knees beneath the ripples, "Does he even know you're gay?"

Laxus muffled a laugh, "I'm bisexual… and no."

"Oh…" he floundered slightly, "So this will just be a blind surprise, then."

"You're not scared of Gramps," it wasn't a question, it was a statement, and he stared directly at Gajeel as he said it. His response was a half-shrug and a flip of his wrist as if to flick the words out of his headspace.

"I just don't know how well he'll like his only grandson choosing to fuck around with the guy who destroyed the guild,"

Laxus raised a brow at him, a dry smile tugging at the corners of his mouth, "You say that like I also didn't try to destroy the guild."

Gajeel laughed and a bit of sourness touched his tone, "Yeah well… he might take it a little easier on you… blood and all that."

"Nah, Gramps was always really hard on me. He didn't want me goin' around town wreckin' shit and sayin' I was the guldmaster's kid," he grinned as the words passed through his lips and gazed off into the night as if he were remembering something, "Believe it or not Gramps actually tried to teach me not to drink and cuss. As you can tell it worked _so_ well."

"Yeah? What happened?" Gajeel eyed him as if waiting for some big reveal. Laxus snickered.

"Nothing really happened. I got pissed when Gramps kicked my dad out but I came around for the most part. I just got really obsessed with being strong."

"It shows," the words tumbled from his mouth before he could really think them through and he could barely hold Laxus's eyes without the feeling of heat creeping up his neck.

"Yeah? But still nowhere near Gramp's level," Laxus fidgeted with his ring quietly as he spoke. Gajeel was sort of aware that being in Makarov's shadow was a sore spot for the blonde and he opened his mouth to say something about it but Laxus had already quickly changed the subject, not willing to dwell on thoughts of his family at the moment, "So… d'ya wanna tell me what's in store for tomorrow? I'm sick of the secrets."

Gajeel smirked, "Geehee… can't. It'll ruin it."

Laxus rolled his eyes and suddenly a sly look worked its way across his face. He leaned closer to Gajeel and his heart responded eagerly. He tried to hold Laxus's keen gaze but his mouth suddenly felt dry being so close to him, "How am I supposed to know how easy to take it on you tonight if I don't know what we're doing tomorrow?"

Gajeel pushed down the anxious feeling in the pit of his stomach, "You think you can scare me with threats?"

Now it was Laxus's turn to feel his heart quicken to words he'd heard from Gajeel before but this time with a completely different meaning behind them. Laxus moved closer to him in the water, let his hand rest on the outside of Gajeel's tanned thigh. His eyes were glittering like voracious golden zircons.

"Scared yet?" he rumbled and Gajeel suddenly felt even hotter than the water around them.

"Tch, no." he scoffed playfully. Laxus moved even closer and this time his hand slipped up and towards his inner thigh. His face was so close he could feel his breath ghosting against his lips.

"Now?" Laxus voice was impossibly lower and hungry and it made something inside Gajeel shiver. He licked his lips.

"I… are you sure about this?" Gajeel's insecurity suddenly bubbled angrily past his false bravado, trying to squash what was beginning to simmer in between them.

"Yes," Laxus didn't even bat an eyelash and spoke with a confidence and finality that just solidified to Gajeel that he had absolutely no doubts about what he wanted from them. How could he be so self-assured? He was equal parts overwhelmed and envious of his steadfast attitude.

"You know I'm not… I don't… I'm not feminine… and I can't be. It's not… that's not how I am," he felt weak and Laxus's gaze quickly turned from hungry to annoyed.

"Gajeel Redfox," his name on Laxus's lips made him stiffen but it was apparent that Laxus's mood was changing. Maybe this was all it took to ruin things this time, "You're in a dangerous position to be pissing me off."

He blinked, frustration clawing its way through his body, "I just… I don't want you to expect that kind of thing from me."

Laxus let out a tight sigh. He was getting too angry about this, after all Gajeel was going through _a lot_ , had been through _a lot_. Everything aside, he'd always considered himself straight and had come from a place that didn't condone their kind of relationship. Gay men in his mind were flamboyant and womanly. He wasn't like Laxus who'd known for years that he was attracted to the same sex, hadn't had time to figure out how exactly it played into his identity. It was a large step. Laxus unset his jaw and tried to relax. It was difficult to be so wholly amazed by someone who couldn't love themselves. Laxus's words stopped in his throat for a minute. He didn't do sincerity well, he'd never had to before. He wanted to say something to abate his relentless worry, but what? What could he tell Gajeel about himself that would dissipate some of his unease?

He thought Gajeel was amazing. Very few people could go through the hell he'd had to bear and still be sane. He had the grit to do what no one else had to, didn't care to be made into a villain if he thought what he was doing was right. He was immensely loyal and had a golden heart despite his upbringing. He'd had the strength to shake off his past and realize that he could be better, a resolve few men possessed. He was a force of nature with the strength to cut down anyone whom he deemed a threat to those dearest to him. Laxus thought he could be an unstoppable man if he'd just leave what was weighing himself down instead of always carrying it with him.

He felt Gajeel was dark and tempestuous person. He was rugged and masculine with eyes that flashed and struck him with delectable lightning. He was a storm constantly raging that became more punishing with each sure-footed step Laxus took to his center. He was the type of force that toppled castles and jettisoned gentle rivers into rampant torrents. The plague of his self-loathing was foreign to Laxus who had always seen the predatory man beside him as self-assured and commanding. Who could have known this was who he was when he was stripped apart and left in the quiet of the eye of his hurricane? It was inconceivable and Laxus had to remind himself to be gentle, lest he cause the storm to rise again.

"Gajeel," he spoke flatly, never breaking his eyes from the raven's, "I don't think you really get it..."

His red eyes widened as Laxus slipped his other hand to his knee and stood, gripping Gajeel's flesh and pulling him towards his hips. Gajeel fumbled for the wall to keep from slipping under the hot water and the entire motion of his body came to a sudden halt as his inner thighs met Laxus's hips. Laxus had him by the crooks of his legs, not allowing him an avenue of escape. Gajeel's heart was pounding and he couldn't tell if it was in trepidation or excitement; maybe it was both.

"…the things that I like about you aren't _feminine_ ," he tipped his head forward and to the side, making it so that he had to look up at Gajeel to keep his gaze. He didn't mean to look so arrogant but he couldn't help it. He pushed his fingers into the skin of his legs and drew them roughly up, tantalizing and slow, leaning further into the tanned man below him as he did so. He was grinding against him under the water, dragging his hands up Gajeel's abs and relished watching the man arch his back at the feel of his contact. There was so much more waiting for him and Laxus couldn't wait to throw open the door.

"I just… I don't think I'm…" his breath was hitched and Laxus decided he didn't want to hear him talk down about this anymore. They were here to throw caution to the wind, after all, so maybe Laxus should just go ahead and push him headfirst into the depravity he'd kept pent up for so long. Did he have to be cruel? He pushed his hips harder into him, this time feeling the allure of pleasure when he brushed against Gajeel under the water. Gajeel must have felt it too because his words suddenly stayed in his throat. Laxus rolled his hips into him again and made a show of using his tongue to roll against his bottom lip hungrily. He didn't know what was better or worse, being blatant about his appetite or restrained. Gajeel just seemed to dodge to any chance for exit he saw and Laxus wanted him cornered.

"I don't care what you think you are," Laxus breathed, letting the words turn into a growl as they shivered out his throat. Red was starting to dot Gajeel's flesh on his chest and neck and his eyes widened, glittering like blood and full of muted disbelief.

"You look like you're gonna to kill me," Gajeel's voice broke through. It was quiet and oddly firm and Laxus blinked his way out of his thoughts. Rosy blush had traveled up to Gajeel's studded ears now, his awkwardness making him heat up.

Had he been staring at him? Had he looked irritated? Gajeel seemed edgy, his red eyes not meeting his own but instead resting at his neck. He leaned down and captured his gaze, got so close Gajeel didn't have a choice but to look at him.

"Do you want me to?" the strange look in his ruby eyes was enough response to prompt Laxus to keep going. He could be harsh or mean or exciting, anything really. He didn't mind playing around. Hadn't Gajeel said once that he liked being rough? Laxus pushed down his worry. He sparked, sending a flicker of shuttering electricity into the air around them. Gajeel's eyes widened and he moved as if to push Laxus away but he gripped his wrist and held him still.

"Laxus…" he hissed it as a caution but Laxus wasn't worried. This was his specialty, he knew he wasn't going to hurt either of them. Electricity danced in the air around them, flirting just above the water and licking the humid air. Gajeel was uneasy but Laxus wasn't going to let it overtake him. He pressed his hand to his chest, let it travel easily up to his neck and hold him still to look at him.

"I told you I wasn't going to hurt you," he let his voice hover just above a whisper, "Just trust me already."

He let go of his wrist and to his surprise, Gajeel didn't retract his hand but instead tentatively slipped his hands around his neck. His blush had finally consumed his cheeks but he didn't break Laxus's gaze.

"Sorry," he muttered and clenched his jaw. His eyes were fiery and caught a yellow flash every time Laxus's lightning got too close. He forced an unconfident smirk onto his features and his teeth glistened white up at him, "I'm… I'm in your hands."

Laxus hadn't meant to, but a flash of lightning cracked in the clouds above them. Gajeel clutched him tightly as brontide shuddered over the countryside and Laxus's hungry lips at Gajeel's throat had an edgy chuckle escaping his lips.

"Damn… that got you fired up," he breathed hoarsely into Laxus's ear.

"What do you expect saying shit like that?" Laxus murmured into his skin, running his tongue against his neck. Laxus's hands were slipping around Gajeel's ribs to dig nails into his back and hold him close. He heard Gajeel's breath shudder and moved to his lips. Their rough caress was consuming to him. Gajeel's taste was like a gentle spice in his mouth and his tongue begged to capture more of his flavor. They were chest to chest but Laxus wanted to be closer. In the water, they were restricted to what they could do and it was already starting to annoy him. He pressed his hips into Gajeel's and loved the hushed breath he sucked in from it. He just wanted to devour him and it was driving him mad. He was so tired of being patient. When he pulled back he was breathless and Gajeel's eyes were filled with longing. It took all of his self-control to keep from driving back down into him.

Laxus wanted to demand it of Gajeel but he didn't think the man would take it well. For a moment, he had to grapple with his pride and lust to keep himself muted, "I want you… on the bed."

Gajeel licked his lips and Laxus leaned closer, wanting to intercept his mischievous muscle but unable to reach him before it was retracted back behind rough lips, "Yeah… I'll… uh, yeah."

They rose from the hot spring. Gajeel immediately felt as if all of the heat had been sapped from him as he left the water. Laxus's sparks still danced around him and it made him nervous but the blonde was right behind him, ensuring that neither of them would be bitten by this manifestation of his avidity. He hastily grabbed a towel and could feel Laxus's closeness as he reached at the same time. Static made his hair stand on end and a small shock from Laxus's hand brushing past his made his skin prickle. Laxus moved powerfully, the physical incarnation of thunder and passion almost herding Gajeel in the direction he wanted. Neither of them closed the door and so chilled air and humidity spilled in to the comfortable warmth, but they were hasty and didn't really care. Gajeel didn't even have the time to hesitate or grapple with his insecurities with Laxus's shadow looming above him, immediately stripping him of his towel and pushing him still wet onto the sheets.

The springs groaned as Gajeel lowered himself down, stomach rolling dangerously as iron spiked in his system from his unease. Laxus didn't join him on the bed but instead gazed down at him as if Gajeel were some deist and Laxus was solely there to prove that in fact god was real and he was about to make the heathen man below him his most devout votary with just the reality of his physical body. Gajeel tried to convince himself to be ready for this impassioned purification he was about to be put through at the Thunder God's hands but even still his mind suffered damningly when Laxus's hands were gripping his knees, pulling him harshly to the edge of the bed and into a position he was very familiar with, although never with another man.

Laxus sought for his lips and ignited fire in the pit of the Iron Mage's stomach. He placed his palms to either side of his hips and worked his way down his neck. Gajeel let his head roll back and allow him a better angle, trying to be docile and just let himself feel the electrical current Laxus was turning his circulatory system into. His heart shuddered and his pulse was fast. The feel of Laxus's teeth on his throat made his blood strike with lightning. He felt he needed to do something but didn't know what so he just let his body feel and relax under Laxus's imposing concupiscence. His tongue was hot against his jugular and his teeth cool and sharp as they bit into his clavicle. He sucked a hiss in through his teeth at the voracious gooseflesh Laxus's mouth incited while he inched his way slowly, teasingly, cruelly, down his chest, his stomach, naval, until he was at level with his engorged member.

Gajeel stayed leaned back on his palms and stared down at Laxus, face cold but eyes ablaze with anticipation. Laxus didn't give him the satisfactory feeling he was awaiting, though. He liked dragging this out and so he bit into the soft flesh of Gajeel's inner thigh and savored the dissolute moan that ripped itself from Gajeel's lips. Laxus gazed up at him, a licentious look that made Gajeel's lip curled in a sexually charged snarl as he found it harder to contain himself. Laxus flattened his tongue and ran it up his length, keeping his hands on his thighs so he couldn't have a chance to take control. Another agonizingly slow stroke had a growl shivering from Gajeel's mouth and when Laxus looked up at him again he had his knuckles pressed to his lips as if trying to keep in the sinful noise. Laxus finally pushed his head to his mouth, dragged his teeth against the sensitive skin threateningly as inch by inch he captured him. He could hear Gajeel's breath shuddering as he made his way down his length and then drew salacious slowness back again.

Gajeel tried to buck his hips to the motion but Laxus held him down, made him take the applications he was giving him instead draw his own satisfaction. Gajeel was being driven insane. The wet friction was torturously slow and he desperately needed more, faster, harder. Agitation was building in his chest and in a restive act to get what he wanted he balled a fist into Laxus's hair and pushed him down. He gritted his teeth against a sigh of relief when he pulled the blonde back again but immediately regretted the act when Laxus dug his nails into his flesh angrily. He grunted, not disliking the feeling and forcing him back down again. Again, he drew Laxus back but the Thunder God's eyes flashed dangerously this time and when he pushed him back down he was too harsh, hitting his throat and causing him to stop a gag. Gajeel released him as soon as he realized and Laxus came up with a frenzied gasp, eyes wild at Gajeel's sudden outburst.

"What the fuck…" he raged, gripping Gajeel legs again to pull his hips against his own, "…made you think-"

Gajeel's heart was pounding, a feeling like adrenaline suddenly flushing through his veins, "That's what you get for being a fucking tease."

Laxus narrowed his eyes and was over top of him in an instant, his mouth colliding with his like a meteor to a mountainside, hot and fitful and tearing him apart. Gajeel wrapped his hands around his neck, dug his nails into his nape and pulled at his hair. He was slightly aware that Laxus was reaching wildly, digging into his bag that was sitting on the nightstand and agitatedly fishing out a small bottle before toppling the rest of its contents to the floor. Gajeel took the opportunity to assault him for once and slipped his hand down to grip his shaft. Laxus clenched his jaw and Gajeel noticed his movements were much more confused now that half of his focus was on the pleasure rushing up his loins. Laxus pushed himself up to rest on his heels, using his free hand to dig fiery stripes down Gajeel's chest. He shuttered and sighed, rolling his hips against Laxus's ass at the feeling. He ran his thumb against Laxus's head and the blonde put a hand to his own, staying him with just a lustful look.

He slid himself off the bed again, this time letting his knees rest against the edge. Gajeel propped himself up on his elbows, his ravenous desire suddenly quieting as Laxus ripped angrily the vile open and poured some of the shimmery liquid onto his hand. Golden eyes noticed his apprehensive look and in a vindictive action to Gajeel's earlier truculence he poured the cold fluid onto his sensitive flesh, making him flinch and shiver. He dropped the rest of the bottle to the ground, not much caring for niceties at the moment, and took hold of the crook of Gajeel's knee.

"How flexible are you?" he smirked and red tinged the tops of Gajeel's ears. He had one hand resting at his throat and the other smoothing across his forehead. His eyes were muted and worrisome with what their next step was.

"I'm not," his voice was guttural as if he had to force it through the back of his throat.

"I bet you're not as bad as you think," Laxus grinned with a touch of cheekiness as he directed the raven's hips how he wanted them, bringing his tanned leg up to rest over his shoulder. Gajeel thought his dark, rough skin looked exotic in comparison to Laxus's soft white and it made his stomach twist to be in this position; completely bare, pliant and subservient. He didn't mean for the disgusted noise at the back of his throat to actually escape when he felt Laxus's hand slip to his opening. Laxus's eyes snapped up to his as he pushed inside with his finger causing Gajeel to grit his teeth.

"Am I hurting you?" Laxus breathed, much more considerate to his partner than just moments earlier.

"No," Gajeel muttered, feeling cold chills rocketing up his spine as Laxus eased his digit in and twisted it so his palm was facing the ceiling. He arched his back at the strange feeling of his fingers pressing something inside of him that lit sparks in his body and he shut his eyes to stifle a tremor that fought to go through his body, "It's weird…"

"In a bad way?" Laxus rumbled as he pressed his middle finger against him, getting lubricated enough to slip it in as well and only stopping when he heard a growl fighting through Gajeel's chest, "Need me to stop?"

"T's fine…" Gajeel's breathing was becoming more erratic. This was a feeling he wasn't used to and he didn't know yet if he liked it or not but every time Laxus pushed into his heat he brushed something that made his entire body start to shiver. He dug his nails into his own throat and covered his eyes with his arm, not wanting to watch as Laxus did this to him. He could feel himself being stretched and it was uncomfortable but whenever Laxus hit that spot he could feel himself being pushed higher. He licked his lips, not sure how to feel but knowing that he didn't want him to stop. Laxus almost completely withdrew his fingers and then pushed in harshly, sending a flash of pleasure through his body. He swore and Laxus did it again, forcing his legs to shake and his hips quiver.

"Did I hurt you?" Gajeel was suddenly aware Laxus's voice was a lot closer to his face this time.

"No…" his voice refused to come out so it was more of a breathy sigh and he felt Laxus completely retract from him. Laxus shifted on the bed and Gajeel felt the tightness in his thighs as he leaned down and tore his arm from where it shielded his eyes. Gajeel blinked up at him, feeling like a mess beneath Thunder God. Laxus looked hungry upon meeting his gaze and Gajeel felt his hard dick pressing against him, sliding up and down his slick flesh.

"Don't cover yer eyes," Laxus commanded but still he held his wrist down on the bed.

"Tch…" Gajeel clicked his teeth as Laxus pressed against him. He seemed so much larger now that he was about to enter him and Gajeel's hesitation was showing in his ruby irises, "Can't imagine you'd want to see them that badly,"

Laxus used his hand to angle himself how he wanted, "Of course I do… I love your eyes,"

His sincerity caught them both a little off guard. Gajeel felt like his heart was melting a little bit, "No one loves my eyes."

Laxus got a soft look in his eyes, something Gajeel didn't think he'd seen there before, "Then I'll be the exception."

He penetrated him, pushed through his opening and inching his way deeper while trying to gauge whether or not Gajeel was uncomfortable. The raven only managed to keep one of his eyes open as he winced, although it wasn't pain that was driving him to shudder the way he did. Laxus didn't stop until he was completely sheathed in his heat and he didn't have the strength to restrain his moan and sharp intake of breath.

"You seem to be the exception to a lot of things… for me, anyway." Gajeel sighed shamelessly as he arched his back and grinded his ass against Laxus for a bit of friction. He felt so full, so warm, and the ecstasy he felt from Laxus's member hitting his sensitive spot made him breathless. Laxus didn't move but his arms were shaking on either side of Gajeel.

"Shit… you're burning me up," his eyes were sparkling in the dim light and Gajeel thought that maybe he understood what Laxus meant by loving someone's eyes. Laxus pulled out of him with a tantalizing slowness and it made Gajeel's entire body shiver when he thrusted back into him. The blonde's eyes were swimming with hunger and he was quickly losing his ability to be gentle. Gajeel didn't mind, in fact he wouldn't have minded if he'd been a little rougher.

"…Laxus…"

Hearing his name forced from Gajeel's lips ignited a ravenous need in his core and he balled his fists into the sheets to try to contain himself. Gajeel's eyes were like molten lava gazing up at him and he could tell without the words what he wanted. He stopped holding back and drove into the raven with wonton abandon, gripping his hard shaft to add to the Iron Dragon's carnal bliss. Gajeel dug his nails into Laxus's back and dragged them down his spine, enjoying the way he clenched his teeth and glowered down at him. He ran his tongue against his canines as warmth started to build in his body. Each thrust was making him get higher and he felt foreign pressure building in his heat, threatening to take a hold of him.

"Shit… hah… Gajeel…" Laxus was panting his name and it was driving him mad. He wanted everything building in him to finally topple over. He wanted Laxus to cum hard inside of him. He wanted…

"Laxus…" Gajeel pulled him down to kiss him. It was hot and completely unrestrained. Laxus didn't think he could have been any more a part of Gajeel and Gajeel to him. It was cheesy and stupid but he laced his fingers in with the raven's as the first tremors of his limit reached him. He was tasting Gajeel's tongue when he came and Gajeel shuddered and arched his back at the feeling and was suddenly digging his nails into Laxus's back ferociously. Laxus licked his lips as Gajeel's eyes became lost in his own ecstatic ravishment. He didn't immediately want Laxus out of him after he came but instead pulled him down to his lips again, the kiss he gave him so deep and impassioned that Laxus felt his heart racing from it. Gajeel's tongue laid waste to his mouth and pulled another agonizing moan from his lips before he finally released him.

Both of them were breathless and sweaty and covered in their lovemaking. Laxus still didn't pull from Gajeel but he did roll back on his heels and let his hands rest at the Iron Dragon's hips. Gajeel was still shivering from his high, something so intense he'd never experienced before. He was honestly surprised, he didn't think he'd enjoy being at Laxus's mercy so much. Of course, he'd never admit that out loud. He just gazed up at Laxus's godly figure still leaning over him and secretly wondered when he'd just vanish in a flash of light and leave him there in the cold.

"Well, Sparky, you're not such a bad fuck after all," he breathed a smile touching his eyes as he spoke.

Laxus smoothed his hands against his hips as he pulled out of him, the sensation making Gajeel shiver again, still sensitive from his high, "And you didn't freak out."

Gajeel bit down his pride and forced the words on the tip of his tongue out. After all, this man had just seen every part of him. What did those kinds of reservations matter at this point?

"Thank you for taking care of me," he purred, canines glinting dangerously up at Laxus as he spoke. Laxus felt like a shot of whiskey had just been poured straight into his blood. His eyes widened as he gazed down at Gajeel, piercings glittering in the dim light and lungs still fighting to keep up after their love making. He thought for sure his heart had suddenly stopped because his veins suddenly iced over.

He loved him. The realization was like being in a room teeming with people only to notice they'd all gone quiet. It as a slow, simple shock to his heart and he suddenly felt like he was higher than the mountain they'd climbed that day. He wouldn't bring Gajeel's attention to it, he didn't want to scare him. So instead, he just wrapped his arms around his torso and hugged him tightly, burying his face into his chest despite his protests.

"Oi…! Laxus…! I'm c-covered with…!"

"Shaddup, I know," he murmured, "We can clean off in the spring. I just… I need a minute… like this… with you."

Gajeel settled and, though hesitantly at first, ran his fingers through Laxus's blonde locks. His eyes fluttered shut and he just basked in the raven's presence. He didn't think he'd ever felt so happy before or so complete. He loved the man beneath him and he was honestly so elated. They still had one more day in paradise together before they had to go back home. Mavis's sakes, he just didn't want this weekend to end.


	42. Chapter 42

Chapter 42:

The night was so incredibly cold. It almost seemed colder than any night he'd ever been out in the early, early morning. Guilt sunk its malicious claws into his chest as if it were trying to rip out his heart. He was breaking a promise to himself and each step made his feet feel heavier and heavier as if he were walking his way through setting concrete. He pulled the cowl around his shoulders tighter, trying to conceal his face and stave off the chill.

He was doing this for a good reason, he told himself. He shouldn't feel this way.

A step echoed his and his heart started pounding harder. He pretended he didn't hear it just like he'd pretended every other time. He couldn't let them know that he was keen to every shadow that followed him in the street, couldn't give them the advantage of knowing he was well aware that he was being tailed. No, not until he had more information. He needed to track them down and it took every ounce of his wicked prowess to scrape his way through the complexities of this unknown empire.

He slipped through an alley and in a single, fluid motion slipped off his cloak and stashed it in a dumpster. He took care not to make a noise as he stalked through the bamboo forest that surrounded the hot springs. He swept his eyes past the footprints that would have been easily missed by the untrained eye, didn't bat an eyelash to the snapped stalks and hastily covered tracks.

He could play this game better than anyone.

He eyed the hot springs where the bastard had watched them strip down naked. His heart clenched dangerously. They'd seen Laxus. They knew they weren't just roommates, they were lovers. His eyes lingered on the puddles of water from when they'd made their retreat into the hotel. Each step he took to the French doors drove his pulse further into his throat as he caught sight of smeared mud from a boot print that he hadn't left when he'd stolen himself into the night just a few hours prior.

He took care not to hesitate at the door and as naturally as possible pull the handle to slide in. He skulked carefully inside, made a show of clicking the doors together as silently as possible and pulling the curtains. For just a heartbeat he stood motionless and listened. Laxus's breaths were coming in smoothly, calmly. He was in a very deep sleep. He drew his eyes up to study the suite and found nothing amiss, everything was just the way he'd left it. Carefully, so as to not wake the god sleeping in his bed, he tiptoed across the room and placed his boots back precisely where he'd retrieved them. He tore off his clothes and stashed them hastily in his bag.

His skin prickled from the cold but it didn't stop him from turning his eyes to the doors once again and making the journey back to the frosted glass. He paused and closed his eyes, listening to the sounds of the night. His heart jumped to the sound of a twig snapping. Soft, silky footsteps travelled through the tall grasses and stepped solidly on stone. He held his breath at their approach, kept his hands on the locked doors just in case. If they made a move he'd meet them with fury and iron but he didn't think it'd be necessary, not this time. The steps stopped at the door, waited, and he could hear a shaky breath from whoever was on the other side. It felt like an eternity was passing around them. He swore he could feel the moon setting, the stars travelling their course across the heavens, the universe clicking like intricate pieces of clockwork around them. Then, slowly, stealthily, his stalker slunk back across the spring and into the wall of stalks.

His whole body relaxed and he released the death-grip he'd had on the door handles. He padded across the room but couldn't find it in him to sit back down on the bed. It wasn't too difficult to see Laxus's face, even in the dark. His eyes cut through the night and he could easily make out the sharp angles of his scar and gentle curve of his blonde eyelashes. The smell of their lovemaking still clung to the air. Laxus smelled fiery and him like spice and together they'd created a perfume that reminded him of spiced rum or fresh tobacco leaves but with the same strength of peppermint or lavender. As he gazed down at the Thunder God, his guilt crawled up his chest to sit at the base of his throat.

He only had a few rules for himself and each one he was breaking like dried rose petals between his fingers. His only saving grace was that he wasn't dragging Laxus down with him.

He gritted his teeth. He could feel it again, that ache making his wrists throb and his flesh sear with fire. Again, there were sweet, sinister fingers travelling across his skin and constricting like a vice around his throat. He'd never be that weak again. He'd never allow himself to be dragged through that torture again. He didn't care what measures he had to take, what rules he had to break. He was going to keep the people he cared about safe, no matter the cost, be it his integrity or his life. Hell, he didn't even care if Laxus ended up hating him so long as he was safe.

So long as he didn't have to go through the same hell he'd been made to.

He sat on the edge of the bed, damning the springs as they groaned beneath his weight. Laxus's breath hitched, his snores stopped, and his eyes fluttered open for a moment.

"Gajeel?" he muttered, his arms reaching out for him under the sheets.

"Shit, Sparky… I didn't mean to wake you," he breathed huskily as he pulled back the covers.

"Something wrong?" he murmured, rubbing his good eye with his palm and propping himself up with the other.

"Nah… I just…" he hesitated and then forced on a gentle smile, "I had a nightmare."

"Yeah? Did I…? Was it too much?" through his drowsiness his eyes reflected concern and it stabbed Gajeel in the heart.

"No, it's fine," he slipped back under the blankets. They had stayed warm from Laxus's body heat and it seeped into his cool flesh like purifying fire, "I just needed to clear my head for a minute."

"Yeah… sorry…" Laxus wrapped his arms around Gajeel's torso and drew him close, resting his head on his chest as he started drifting back to sleep, "You're cold."

Gajeel ran his fingers through short blonde locks and kissed his forehead before letting his eyelids flutter shut, "My bad."

He'd had so few rules for himself. Honestly, he was so terrible. Maybe he just had no self-control or he was just too useless to even rise to his own low standards. He rested his knuckles against his lips and tasted the cold tang of steel. Since he was so hell bent on destroying all of his self-contrived pillars of integrity, he might as well add one more to the mix: getting too close to someone who could easily leave.


	43. Chapter 43

Chapter 43:

Laxus was cold.

First, he tried to fight it and pull the blankets up higher to cover his shoulders, but then he realized he was alone. He blinked his eyes open slowly, wiping the sleep from them as the first rays of morning hit him. He stretched, yawned, and sat up, looking around the suite. It was as empty and cold as he felt. He shivered.

Where was Gajeel?

He glanced to the door where his boots were sitting. Dried mud caked the sides, probably from their hike the day prior. His clothes still littered the floor from last night and his bag was sitting by one of the lounge chairs. He pushed himself up from the bed and walked over to the French doors, attempting to peek out one of the frosted windows and coming up short. He was about to grab some clothes and go into the chilly, autumn morning in search for his partner when he heard the shower start. He let out a tight breath and sort of kicked himself for not checking there first.

Laxus smirked as he headed for the back of the suite. He stopped at the door and just listened as Gajeel's smoky voice filled the space with its deep, bluesy ring. Laxus was starting to realize he really liked it when he sang, particularly love songs. He could listen to the ring of his voice for hours, could make a record of it and play it until it fell to pieces. He loved it, just like he loved so many other things about the raven. He chewed on the inside of his lip. He should make a point to tell him sometime. Gajeel had such sensitive pride and it would probably make him smile.

He didn't knock, just eased the door open and let the heat and steam rush out of the small room at him. He crossed his arms and leaned on the doorframe, his eyes not shy in their search for the Iron Dragon. This was _definitely_ a honeymoon suite. The bathroom held a two-person vanity, a toilet, and a massive shower. There was no curtain for privacy and instead a wide glass window that hid nothing in its other side. Three large rain showerheads were installed into the ceiling and it was under these that Gajeel stood, his face turned up and eyes shut, looking the most relaxed Laxus had ever seen him. He almost felt bad for the intrusion and so instead of just waltzing over and surprising him, he actually rapped at the doorframe to grab his attention. Red eyes lazed open like some sort of sun-bathing cat's and focused on him gently, as if he didn't have a care in the world at the moment.

"Mind if I join you?" he smirked and Gajeel just returned his smile, his eyes gleaming with mischief and also something that made Laxus feel incredibly warm. Affection, maybe?

"Whatever you want, Sparky,"

Laxus didn't hesitate. He was in the shower and next to the raven in an instant, lips searching for the shorter mage in the pouring water. He could feel Gajeel's grin against his mouth and a growl sneak past his kiss. When he pulled back Laxus was on his neck, almost ecstatic when Gajeel tipped his head back to allow him a better angle. Gajeel gasped, his chest quivering to Laxus's gentle touch. He seemed more confident, _far_ more confident than last night, and Laxus wanted to take full advantage.

"I swear to Earthland you have a shower fetish," Gajeel chuckled, grinding his hips against the blonde and feeling just how riled he was getting.

"I told you, it's more like a _you_ fetish…" he nipped at his collar and Gajeel sighed, lacing bare fingers into his soaked hair. Gajeel shivered despite the hot water and ran a free hand down to grip Laxus's dick. He teased him gently, running his thumb over his tip and caused Laxus to lose concentration on the marks he was leaving on Gajeel's tanned skin. Gajeel's touch was already driving Laxus crazy before he brought his other hand to fondle his balls and nearly topple him completely. Laxus's legs started to tremble and his mind was going fuzzy, and he buried his face into Gajeel's neck as he tried to keep it together.

"Shit..." he ran his tongue up Gajeel's jawline and bit his ear, "You better stop before you make me cum…"

"That's really all it takes for you?" he teased huskily but Laxus didn't have anything to say back. He was too busy slipping his hand down Gajeel's strong back, gripping onto his ass, and sliding his fingers to his opening. Gajeel didn't even start at the sudden intrusion, just shuddered out a sigh when Laxus greedily helped himself, "Already done taking it slow, eh?"

"After how well you did last night?" he purred into Gajeel's ear and sucked on his studs, "And those nice things you said?"

"Nice things?" now it was Gajeel's turn to have his mind go blank. Laxus fingered him tenderly, just enough to make him want more. It was a bad angle so he couldn't get quite deep enough to hit the bundle of nerves that would make Gajeel start to shudder with pleasure. It was frustrating and he had to keep his throat closed so a whine didn't work its way out and through his lips.

"Yeah… about how I'm the only one who does this to you," he withdrew from Gajeel and the raven gritted his teeth, his dick throbbed with hunger and his eyes glazed over with lust. Laxus smiled cheekily down at him, "I like that look,"

"You're so fucking cocky," Gajeel let Laxus move him the way he wanted, placed his hands against the cool tile wall so he'd be able to keep his balance. Laxus was behind him, nipping and licking at his shoulder as he searched for his heat again. He pulled his ebony hair over one shoulder; the silky tangles were heavy with water and smelled like the spice that had invaded their bed the night prior. He balled his fist into Gajeel's raven hair, guiding his head to the side to leave tracks of fire on the nape of his neck and loving how Gajeel clenched his fists against the tile as he tried to contain himself. Laxus licked his lips at the delicious noise that escaped the base of Gajeel's throat when he plunged his fingers back into his heat. He pushed in as deep as he could go, handled him roughly as he sought to hear that sound again but was only rewarded with the Iron Mage's erratic breaths.

Gods alive… he wanted more. He hadn't heard enough of Gajeel's voice last night. He didn't want that tense, reserved sound of shuddering sighs or restrained growls any longer. He wanted Gajeel calling out his name, telling him exactly what he needed to shiver with pleasure, asking for more or even begging him not to stop. He wanted the red-eyed man unhinged, breathless and rolling with ecstasy. He just couldn't get enough of him; he wondered what it would take to completely devour him.

"Lax…" he strangled a hiss when Laxus bit into his shoulder blade, the muscles in his back tightened when he finally pulled his fingers from Gajeel's tight heat so he could push his hard member against his ass.

"Why don't you say my name?" Laxus growled into his ear and wrapped his arm around his torso so he could dig his nails into Gajeel's chest. He gasped, gritted his teeth as he trembled against Laxus easing himself inside him. Laxus ran his tongue against the muscle on his neck, sucked hungrily on his skin and left a delicious bruise, "You always hide your voice…"

"I just… I don't…" Gajeel's voice was strained and tremulous, the further Laxus entered the more Gajeel's thighs began to shake.

"Are you worried you'll look weak?" he sheathed himself inside the Iron Dragon, a lubricious smile playing at his lips at Gajeel's shivers. Laxus reached forward and rested his hands on either side of Gajeel's, just tall enough to almost completely surround him. He licked the raven's neck and heard his breath slither past his teeth.

"You think you can make me weak?" Laxus was sure if he could see the raven's ruby eyes they'd be swimming with challenge and fire.

Gajeel arched his back and leaned forward onto his forearms. Laxus grunted as just the simple change allowed him to be completely enveloped by Gajeel. He could already feel the pressure starting to build in the base of his spine, the need to move, to gain the friction his body desperately craved. He ran his tongue against his teeth, so gluttonous for the man beneath him.

"You don't know what kind of challenge you just gave me," Laxus breathed into his ear causing Gajeel to growl beneath him. He pulled back and grinded into him, starting out slow and building a torturous burn in Gajeel's core. He didn't push himself far enough in to hit his sweet spot, only enough to give him a delightful taste of what he wanted. Gajeel arched and hunched his spine, the frustration of not getting what his body desired making him try to deepen Laxus's thrusts. The blonde held his hips still, though, and it was slowly driving the raven mad.

Laxus wasn't finished. He knew there were so many ways he could torture the Iron Dragon. He slipped one hand up Gajeel's throat, glided past his chin, and hooked two fingers past his lips. Gajeel was ravenous, he sucked on the digits and ran his tongue down their lengths. Laxus felt heat gathering in his groin from the way Gajeel let his canines dig hungrily into his skin. His other hand wandered to Gajeel's neglected shaft. It was hard and needy. Laxus had no problem exciting it even more with his touch but despite the advantages he was taking from Gajeel it was actually his own control that was slipping faster than the water down his back.

"Shit… Gajeel…" he growled into his studded ear, fighting to keep down his lust. He could feel the pulse in Gajeel's dick, the traitorous organ telling him just how much he was being affected even though he was refusing to say it out loud. His breathing was becoming more and more unhinged each time Laxus flicked his thumb across his head, he'd gasp whenever Laxus stroked down his length. Finally, Laxus couldn't take it anymore. His impatience got the best of him and he bit onto his earlobe, "…I guess if you're really not interested… I could always stop…"

He pulled his hands back from the Iron Dragon who immediately let out a groan in protest, "Laxussss..."

"Hm?" he stopped the slow fuck he'd kept going up until now, trying to stifle the quivering in his legs from his thirst for more, "Did you want something?"

Gajeel gritted his teeth and Laxus grinned, feeling his victory approaching.

"Is something wrong, Gajeel?" he sneered gently, not wanting to completely crumple the raven's pride, "You have to tell me or I'll think I've upset you and stop…"

" _Laxus_ ," his voice was barely concealing his desperation and Laxus reveled in it, " _Please._ "

His heart skipped a beat and he bent down to purr in his ear, "Please what? Please stop?"

" _No_ …" Gajeel was furious, Laxus knew, but he had turned into such a glutton for him that he couldn't resist, "Dammit… just…"

Gajeel pressed his forehead into his fists and Laxus could see the red rising up his neck, "Just… fuck me properly, already."

"Mmm…" Laxus pulled back his hips and licked his lips eagerly, "Then you'd better make sure I hear that sexy voice of yours."

He didn't await Gajeel's reply. His own depravity was driving him insane and the torture from Gajeel's heat had him collapsing, pushing his full weight into him in his first strong thrust. Gajeel cried out, his throat closing at the end when Laxus was fully inside him. It was glorious and made Laxus's spine flash as if just the noise had caused him to be struck, body and soul, by lightning. He lost all reservation about being too rough as he pounded into him, each penetration dragging a lustful moan from the raven.

"Laxus… hahh… fuck… that's…"

His face didn't leave where it was buried in the crook of his arm but the rose on his throat was fading as he became increasingly lost.

"You like that?" he huffed in his studded ear, his pulse spreading excitement and avarice through his body, "Tell me…"

"Yes…" he arched his back, his voice becoming wilder and sinfully erotic to the blonde, "I like it… shit… Laxus…!"

He splayed his hands on the cold tile wall either side of Gajeel, his chest pressed against the strong muscles of the raven's back; smooth porcelain skin on harsh bronze. He freed one of Gajeel's hands from where it was clenched into a tight fist against the wall and intertwined their fingers, a grip so tight he could feel the blood pooling in his fingertips. They fit together so perfectly like this. Laxus's pulse began to sing in his ears and Gajeel's breathless rapture sent chills down his spine. He could do this forever, craved a connection like this that would never end. Three words ricocheted off every part of his insides as it fought to tumble free but he knew he couldn't say it yet, Gajeel wouldn't hear it, and he didn't want to ruin their weekend. But that didn't mean he wasn't finding it harder and harder to fight the words on the tip of his tongue, the heartfelt confession on his lips, so he thought it instead.

"Fuck… Gajeel…" Laxus's voice was a barely contained plea, _I think I love you_.

His orgasm hit him hard and shook his core in a brilliant flash of white light. He heard Gajeel call his name and it made him tumble hard from his height. He was deep in Gajeel when he let loose, kicking himself for not being considerate until Gajeel suddenly shuddered and cursed. His entire body shook from his orgasm and it almost swept Laxus away again with its intensity. His legs were still trembling and his breathing haggard when Laxus pulled from him, feeling as if Gajeel had stolen the heat straight from his body as he stepped away. When Gajeel finally straightened, he didn't say anything and it made Laxus apprehensive.

"Oi? You alright?" he muttered as Gajeel turned to look at him finally.

"Stop asking me if I'm ok all the time…" he sounded tired but looked satisfied. The way he ran his tongue across his gleaming canines made Laxus's stomach bunch although he was spent for the time being, "It's annoying."

"I know," Laxus smirked down at him, "I just… you were having such a difficult time and all of a sudden… I can do whatever I want to you."

"Well you finally stopped holding me down," Gajeel muttered, not making eye contact. Laxus noticed red inching up to his cheeks, "And… It feels nice when you hold my hand… safe."

Laxus felt like Gajeel had just awoken a strange new place in his heart that had previously never existed before, an extra chamber made specially for him. He made the Iron Dragon feel safe? Just by holding his hand? Bashful warmth completely overtook his face as he watched Gajeel try to wrestle with his emotions. Mavis's sakes… he was stupidly infatuated almost to the point of being giddy.

"You don't think it's cheesy as hell?" a small smile tugged at the corner of Laxus's lips and Gajeel looked up at him with surprise that quickly melted into a quiet affection.

"Oh, absolutely," he teased, "But I kinda figured you'd be a softie like that."

Gajeel slipped past the Lightning Mage and led the way out of the shower. Laxus didn't realize he had such a stupid grin on his face until he passed by the mostly-fogged mirrors and blush scorched his cheeks at the realization. Gajeel acted like he didn't notice, though, and threw a towel at him as he headed out of the bathroom, leaving tiny puddles in his wake as he hastily dried his hair. Laxus just stood for a moment in the steam and settled down the light feeling in his body. He was so fucking smitten it was ridiculous.

When he finally emerged into the living area he crossed his arms and leaned on the kitchen countertop, watching Gajeel as he grabbed the black shirt he'd worn the day before and slipped it on. His nose wrinkled in question when the sleeves were just a tad too long, sitting at his palms, and the shirt was just slightly baggy. Laxus's heart jittered excitedly in his chest and his dumb smile quickly overtook his face again. Gajeel's brow furrowed and he sniffed at the dark fabric a couple of times before he realized it wasn't his. His red eyes darted back to Laxus who didn't hide his delight in the least bit.

"I mean… I don't care if you wear it," Laxus cooed, "Looks cute,"

"I ain't cute," Gajeel snapped, although he did hesitate for just a moment before he ripped the shirt from his shoulders. Laxus's grin only widened although he did wish he'd been more tactful with the poor Iron Mage's ego.

"Cute but like in a completely masculine way… like when men are nice to kids and dogs?" he snickered when Gajeel rolled his eyes and tossed it over to the side of the room.

"Hurry up and get dressed. I'm hungry," he growled, although he didn't turn away fast enough to keep Laxus from seeing scarlet working its way to the tips of his ears.

Laxus dressed in jeans, a simple red shirt, and the leather jacket Mira had somehow convinced him to take along despite his protests. He stole glances at Gajeel as he pulled on some tan pants and a sleeveless black shirt. Laxus was about to make a comment about him being hot blooded when he pulled a scarf from his bag. It was a deep maroon and matched his fingerless gloves. The color actually really brought out the scarlet of the raven's eyes.

Laxus tore his gaze away before Gajeel could catch him staring.

They hit the streets. Laxus with one hand in his pocket and the other searching for the feel of a leather glove surrounding a warm palm. Gajeel's hand slipped into his naturally, as if they hadn't done this just one afternoon prior but a hundred. Few tourists were out this early in the morning, most were still cuddled in beds and enjoying close company in privacy and cozy warmth. They were spared for the most part any sideways glances as they walked side-by-side down the cobblestone streets. Laxus felt like his heart had swelled to take up most of his chest but he did notice from time to time that Gajeel's eyes had taken a murkier, almost worrisome hue.

"Do you know any places around here?" Laxus broke through the raven's thoughts, trying to drag him up to the same height he was at.

"No… but I think if we head towards the station we'll pass by some-"

"Gajeel!" a voice cracked through their quiet talk and Gajeel stiffened, his eyes widening with alarm as he froze. Laxus stepped back to glance in the direction that the call had come from, meeting immediately a pair of silvery-blue eyes. The man had coppery skin and a shock of black hair pulled into long dreadlocks that spilled in heaps down his shoulders. A bright scar marred his face from an inch above his eyebrow down his eye to disappear under his shirt. He was a large man with arms as thick as tree branches but the belly of a baker, and he stood with arms crossed in front of a closed tavern with the door propped open only by his foot as if he'd stepped outside just to see the raven as he passed by, "Gajeel Redfox? You sonofabitch, is that you?"

Gajeel blinked as if processing just who the man was before a toothy grin spread across his face, "Hajime? What are you doing here?"

"What am I doin' here? I own this bar," he beamed as Gajeel approached. He stretched out his hand as if he were going to shake it before gripping onto his forearm and dragging him into a hug, "How the hell have you been?"

Gajeel fought away from him, seemingly flustered by the sudden contact, "Good, good… and you?"

"Hell, I've been doin' great. Business is boomin', got a wife an' a daughter now. Shit… it's been a few years, hasn't it?"

"Almost six," Gajeel's smile faltered slightly as he spoke but before the silence could settle in he glanced over at Laxus and started as if he'd completely forgotten the blonde was even there, "Ahh… Hajime, this is Laxus. Laxus, Hajime."

"Laxus…?" he thrust his hand out heartily, his eyes excited and kind and Laxus took it graciously. Now that he was closer, he took notice of the fine wrinkles around his eyes and mouth. This was a man that smiled and laughed often. There were some wiry strands of grey hair that stood out and mingled with his black. He had to be older, at least twice his own age.

"Dreyar," he noticed Gajeel's smile almost turn sour and he quirked a brow at him.

"Dreyar? Dreyar… Where do I know that name?" Hajime mused and Gajeel sniffed.

"Makarov Dreyar, the Wizard Saint," he prompted and recognition filled his face.

"You're Makarov's boy?" his blue eyes flashed over to Gajeel and back to him, "Really?"

"Grandson," Laxus crossed his arms, "But he did raise me more than my dad."

"Yee… ya got the looks, don't ya?" Hajime smirked, "I'm surprised this brat would end up bein' friends with one of the Dreyars…"

Hajime turned his eyes back to Gajeel and rested his gaze on the guildmark on his shoulder.

"Well I'll be damned… ye ended up joinin' the Fairies?" his smile widened, "Never thought I'd see the day that happened."

Laxus again shot a look at Gajeel and he let out a tense sigh, "Hajime and I were in Phantom together. He was my mentor… before…"

"Taught the lad everythin' he knows," Hajime interrupted him, the mirth never leaving his eyes despite the shadowy look that had settled in Gajeel's, "Probably would've gotten himself killed back when he was just a kid if I hadn't stepped in. Ahh… we had some wild times, eh?"

The side of Gajeel's mouth pulled up as he remembered something, "Sure as hell did."

"Hajime," a soft voice sounded from the tavern and a woman with an anxious expression on her face stepped forward. She had long auburn hair that framed her face and the look of a working woman, although she wore a nice dress and finer jewelry, "We need to finish opening up, love."

"Right, of course," he paused and looked back over at them, "Ye lads had breakfast yet?"

"That's fine… you don't have to…" Gajeel started but Hajime waved him off.

"Nonsense. Come on in. The wife makes the best biscuits an' gravy this side o' the mountains. Ye ain't got somewhere ta be, do yens?"

"Not at all," Laxus smirked, watching Gajeel tense at his words, "We'd love to."

He wasn't trying to start trouble, but the thought of learning more about his partner was thrilling. Gajeel for the most part kept his past locked up. The last time they'd talked was when he was thoroughly drunk and Laxus was curious. Whoever Hajime was, he seemed nice enough. Maybe he was like Gajeel and secretly hated the guild up until its disbandment? What kind of things did they do together? What missions did they take? This was a side to Gajeel Laxus still knew close to nothing about, and as much as he cared for the man he was also smart enough to realize that he needed to know every facet of who he was and where he came from, not just the person he was now.

The tavern was small but nice. Tables were made of old whiskey barrels with stools instead of straight-backed chairs. Hajime's wife was whispering magic into lanterns around the place to bring in some light since the mountains blocked most of the sunlight until about noon. Laxus could see the way she eyed Gajeel as if she didn't trust him to be in the bar without stealing or breaking something. But she didn't say anything to the two as they took their seats and hurried to the kitchen at Hajime's request. He finished setting up the lights as the smell of baked bread began to fill the bar. When he was finished he walked behind the counter and returned to them with a few tumblers and a fifth of whiskey.

"Here ya go," he grinned, pouring them both a glass, "On the house."

Gajeel seemed uneasy and didn't pick up his glass right away, eyeing the golden liquid instead, "Hajime… you don't have to-"

"Nonsense," he hushed him, leaning back on his stool and crossing his arms, "So, what happened to ya after Phantom was taken down? How did ye end up at Fairy Tail?"

"Juvia actually got me in," he muttered, picking up his glass delicately and swirling his drink around before bringing it to his lips, "Without her recommendation I'd probably still be lost. Makarov found me at Phantom's ruins… just sort of figuring out how I was supposed to move on… and what to… and he offered to let me in."

"Really?" Laxus murmured, eyeing Gajeel before also taking a drink. The alcohol was smooth going down and he blinked at the realization that this must have been some expensive stuff, "I figured you sort of came to the guild,"

"Nah… and I would have said no but yer pops has a way with words," he smirked, his eyes lolling to the side as he recalled the day, "Said some shit about how I was a good person on a bad path… and that if I ever hurt his kids again he'd probably kill me."

"Gramps said that?" Laxus's eyes widened, "Shit."

"Yeah…" he grinned, "It ain't so great to be on his bad side."

Laxus felt a pang of remorse. He'd almost beaten Gajeel senseless the day he'd found him at the guild because he thought Makarov was weak for letting him in, that maybe he just hadn't refused for fear Gajeel would wreak havoc on the place again. He'd never thought that it could have been Gajeel who joined out of fear of being on Gramp's blacklist. He opened his mouth to say something but as if Gajeel had read the expression on his face he just waved him away. His lip curled up in a playful grin as he looked up at the blonde.

"I ain't got any grudges, Sparky," was all he said before taking another drink and shutting down the topic.

"Well… I'm glad you got on… I was worried about ya, lad," Hajime sighed, taking a drink as well. His wife waltzed in from the kitchen, a tray on her arm as she carried three fresh dishes of biscuits, white gravy, sausage, and eggs. Laxus had never had the comfort food before, but the smell was amazing, "Thanks much, Lorelai. It's delicious like always,"

Laxus and Gajeel voiced their thanks as well but she just glared down at Gajeel and turned on her heel, heading back for the kitchen. Gajeel didn't say anything about it and neither did Hajime. This must have been something that was old, then, Laxus concluded, and he wondered if he should press the subject. He decided against it and began digging into his food while it was still hot.

Hajime watched Laxus closely for a minute before drawing his gaze to Gajeel, studying him with keen eyes and then rested his chin in his palm. A grin that was equal parts puzzled and wicked alighted on his features and his eyes sparked with mischief, "I have ta say… when ya said ye were staying at the springs with yer partner I thought ya meant yer girlfriend, not yer guildmate."

Laxus's heart banged clumsily in his chest and he suddenly felt very warm. He tried to coolly take another bite but he was sure it showed on his face just how taken back by the comment he was. He glanced over at Gajeel who, aside from rubbing at the back of his neck, showed no sign of nervousness. He matched Hajime's roguish look, his eyes dancing playfully even before he spoke. Laxus just turned back to his food, trying to ignore the prickles of heat crawling up his neck.

"He is my guildmate… _and_ my partner,"

Laxus let out a steady breath. He could feel Hajime's eyes on him and he tried to ignore them. If he was Gajeel's mentor, what would that mean if he didn't approve? How would Gajeel take it? He peeked up to meet his steel-blue eyes and his worries were immediately dashed. He only had a warm and almost impressed expression on his face as he regarded the two men, leaning back in his seat and crossing his arms in almost a fatherly way.

"Been learnin' more about yerself since ya left, eh?" he mused in a kindhearted way, "Well I'm happy for ye. Both of ye. Finding someone ya care about is a wonderful thing."

His eyes darted back to the kitchen where his wife still hadn't returned.

"Makes life mean a little bit more, I s'pose," he muttered almost to himself.

Gajeel watched him and Laxus could really see how highly he regarded Hajime by just his stare, "I'm glad you made it."

The words resonated in the air like the last note of a song and Laxus was almost startled by it. The two's shared silence spoke volumes. They'd been through a lot together. It was the kind of silence that two men shared after they'd been through hell and somehow managed to escape with their lives. It was grateful and kind and raw. Laxus was more curious than ever. What had happened between them? Gajeel never spoke of his mentor from Phantom Lord. The only people he ever seemed to mention of import was Juvia and Jose. Why did two people who regarded each other so highly stop speaking and never have anything to do with the other again?

He noticed that Gajeel was absentmindedly rubbing the scar on his arm and started blatantly at the matching mark across Hajime's face. A bad fight, maybe?

"Hajime," Lorelai emerged from the kitchen, clearly agitated, "Our shipment came in. I need your help unloading the cart,"

"Aye, love," he smiled, immediately standing and grabbing his plate, "Well, ye lads take yer time. This old man's got work ta do."

Gajeel looked like he was going to say something but stopped as Hajime turned towards the kitchen. Laxus raised a brow at him and then glanced up at Hajime.

"Would you like some help?" he offered and saw Gajeel stiffen in his seat.

Hajime glanced back over his shoulder, "Eh?"

"We don't have anywhere to be," Laxus eyed Gajeel for confirmation and he merely shrugged, "And anyway, you gave us free drinks. It's the least we can do."

"Eh… I appreciate the offer lads, but I-"

"Oh, swallow yer pride, old man," Gajeel was already up and headed for the kitchen, elbowing Hajime playfully as he passed, "Besides, I owe ya anyhow."

Laxus got up and followed him, noticing how Hajime's expression softened. He walked after them into the kitchen and showed them to the back door where his wife was waiting. There was a cart heaped with large crates of food and barrels of ale. She did a double-take at the two men as they emerged to help but didn't say anything as they passed, merely signed off for the purchase and propped the door open so they could come and go easily. Hajime leaned on the wall next to his wife and gave simple instructions on where to put everything in the stockroom. The job was easy and the cool air kept them from getting tired. Occasionally, Gajeel would offer an apologetic smile as he passed Laxus, as if to say he didn't mean for them to end up working on their vacation. But Laxus didn't mind. If this really was someone important to Gajeel then he sort of wanted to make a good impression.

It was about mid-morning when they were done and Lorelai had abandoned them to take care of the few customers that had shambled in during that time. Gajeel heard a clatter inside and went to investigate but Hajime didn't seem worried and just leaned casually on the brick wall outside, appreciating the crisp fall morning. Laxus stood near him awkwardly, not sure what to say or do. After the question gnawed at him for some time, he finally got up the nerve to ask.

"So… how did you and Gajeel meet?" Laxus crossed his arms and Hajime chuckled.

"I wanted ta ask ye the same thing," he grinned, pulling out a cigarette and lighting it as he spoke, "I met the lad back when he first joined Phantom. Poor kid didn't know anythin' about bein' in a mercenary guild. I guess ya could say I showed him the ropes. Didn't know at the time I'd be trainin' my replacement but ya live an' learn I s'pose."

He offered the pack to Laxus but he just shook his head, "What do you mean your replacement?"

"I used to work under Jose taking targets," he muttered as he struck his match and took a dreg. Everything from the way he held the cigarette to how he smoked it mirrored Gajeel completely. He supposed Gajeel must have learned from someone; apparently Hajime was the culprit for his nervous habit, "But after a while I'd had enough. I wanted ta settle down, see. Ye can only handle that kind a' life fer so long. Gajeel was the one who took me out of commission."

"He beat you out of the job?" Laxus pried, trying not to be completely obvious. Hajime snorted but his grin wasn't a malicious one.

"In a manner of speakin'," his gaze was off in the distance as he spoke, remembering what had happened with a hint of sadness in his eyes, "Nah, Jose wanted me dead. Gajeel was sent to track me down."

Laxus felt like his blood had suddenly turned to ice, "You're kidding."

"Wish I was… we both left some nasty marks on each other that day. But in the end I guess he saved my life. Convinced Jose that was all it took to keep me quiet… He wasn't entirely wrong," he rubbed at his scar thoughtfully, took another hit from his cigarette, and looked sheepishly over at Laxus who'd paled slightly at his words, "How much do ya know 'bout his time with Phantom?"

"All that he'll talk about," he admitted, rocking back on his heels as he spoke, "I know he's killed people, if that's what you're asking… You could say I've seen him in action."

Hajime frowned, "Really?"

"Yeah…" he pulled his jacket around himself to stave off a cold wind that swept by, "It was… scary."

"I don't doubt it," Hajime let out a tense sigh, "Why did he do it?"

Laxus chose his words carefully as he spoke, because if he were truly honest, he wasn't sure of the answer, "I think it was a few things… she was a terrible person and he knew she wouldn't take the fall for what she'd done. I don't think he could stand to see her walk free and keep ruining kids' lives…"

"Like Jose," he muttered, not meeting Laxus's eyes.

"Yeah…" Laxus stuffed his hands into his pockets and watched Hajime as he spoke. His gaze was far away, remembering a time and a person that Laxus was sure he'd seen as well. A person with red eyes and the kind of hate that drives a man to kill, "More than that, though, I think he hit his limit."

"His limit?"

"She was a very cruel woman," he stated flatly, still remembering those malicious yellow eyes, "I only had a taste of what she really was and it was enough to make me hate her. I don't think I could have killed her even if I'd been through everything he had. I just don't have that kind of strength."

"It ain't strength, lad," Hajime bit back at him, sparking slightly at his words, "It's a disregard for human life."

Laxus prickled and narrowed his eyes at him, "Call it what you want, then, but after seeing what someone like her is capable of I can't blame him for the decision he made. I'm not so stupid to believe there aren't some people in this world who can't be rehabilitated."

"Those are strong words," he hummed, letting the air fill with the acrid smell of tobacco, "Better watch who you say them to. There are men who've used those same words against yer mate,"

Laxus stilled. Did he mean the Magic Council?

"Ye must keep in mind, lad, everyone thought Gajeel was a lost cause. There was no way he could be saved after he was groomed from such a young age to be in Jose's shadow," Laxus watched Hajime carefully, letting his words sink in and biting back his defensiveness for his lover, "There are people still who think he didn't pay the price for his crimes and think he should have never been allowed to walk free."

"Gajeel is different,"

"Gajeel is human," Hajime countered, finally centering his icy gaze on Laxus, "Just like we all are. We're all blinded by greed, or hate, or love, or anger. No one is excluded. We all make mistakes, some make a life of it and others learn and grow from it. Taking a person's life, lad, should never be anything but a last option."

Laxus felt outraged. Was he seriously comparing Gajeel to Bianca? That devil of a woman who thrived off of the murder of children's innocence? Of torturing men in order to make money off of their suffering? A perpetrator of rape and all sorts of other atrocities?

Hajime flicked his butt on the ground and smashed it under his boot, "What's done is done, I s'pose. No use in worryin' over it now. He is definitely a changed man from what he used ta be, there's no denyin' that. I'm just an old codger that worries too much."

Those simple words diffused Laxus although he was still ruffled. When Hajime looked back at him, though, that fatherly presence was back in his features.

"Ya seem to have a good head on yer shoulders, lad, that's a valuable thing. You'll have ta be the one to keep him outta trouble," he smirked, the action making his scar pull to the side, "He's loyal to a fault, that one, and he'll follow ya to the ends of the earth if ya do 'im right… gods help ya if ya get on his bad side, though."

Despite it all, Laxus smiled, "Don't I know that,"

Hajime's grin widened and he stepped closer to Laxus, startling him slightly, "I'm glad ta meet ya, lad. I wish you and Gajeel the best of luck. It's a rough line to tow to deal with 'im, but I think ya have what it takes."

"I try," was all he could think to say as the barkeep stretched a hand out to him to shake. Instead of taking his hand, though, Hajime gripped onto his forearm and pulled him close. Laxus widened his eyes at the sudden change in demeanor as he dropped his voice low and a dark look came to his eyes.

"One thing about us retired mercs, lad, is we take care of ours," Laxus's heart started beating a little faster and his magic rolled nervously in his chest, "If yer ever in any trouble, just remember ya gotta friend outta ol' Hajime, yeah?"

"Y-yeah…"

"Good," he released him then and all the tension suddenly vanished as he pulled out another cigarette. Laxus was so confused. It was as if the sudden exchange had never happened, "Go grab ye boyfriend and escape while ye can. Lorelai has a tendency to suck helpers inta workin' all day with no pay. I'm sure yens have other things ye'll want to do than man a bar while yer on vacation,"

"Right… thanks," Laxus eyed him even as he walked back into the tavern. He caught Gajeel in the stockroom, restacking a few things under Lorelai's instruction, and bid their farewells. Laxus felt off as they left. Even though Gajeel didn't act as if anything was strange, he just couldn't shake off that the whole encounter was odd.

"You alright?" Gajeel's voice broke into his thoughts as they walked, "You're kinda quiet. Did Hajime say something weird?"

"No… not really," he murmured, forcing a smile onto his face as he glanced down at the raven and reached for his hand, "Just that you tried to kill him."

"Oh, that's all," he muttered, looking down at the ground.

"And that I'll have to keep you out of trouble," he said lightly, squeezing his hand as he did so.

"You think you can accomplish that?" his lips quirked up slightly at that and Laxus didn't even try to hide the playfulness in his voice upon his reply.

"I'll try but I'm not a miracle worker,"

"But you're the _Thunder God_ , Laxus," Gajeel tutted back, "What kind of lousy god can't work miracles?"

"The kind that falls in love with devils like you, I suppose," the words slipped past his teeth before he realized what he was saying. For a split second, his heart missed a beat but Gajeel didn't seem to notice or maybe he just didn't think too much into the comment. Instead, a cheeky grin consumed his face until Laxus could see his pointed canines and his eyes glistened blood-orange in the midmorning sun.

"Gihi, I've never been called a devil before… I kinda like that,"

Laxus snorted, "You would,"


	44. Chapter 44

Chapter 44:

"Put these on,"

Gajeel threw a black bag at Laxus. They were back at the hotel and the sun was setting. Laxus had started to think that maybe Gajeel hadn't had anything planned for their second day in Edelweiss and all the talk of keeping his plans a secret was just a ploy. He hadn't been too concerned until his partner had started digging through his pack in search of something with maniacal smile on his face. He eyed the bag in his hands suspiciously. It felt like clothing but he was a little scared to look inside.

"What is it?" he glanced up at the raven who had a wicked grin plastered across his face and eyes as wild as a jungle cat's.

"Gihi… I don't know," he said audaciously, placing his fists on his hips as he waited impatiently, "Why don't you find out."

Well that did nothing to ease the Lightning Slayer's doubts, "If this is some weird shit you're into…"

"Well, you don't have a choice so you might as well stop being a coward about it," he retorted and grabbed a similar black bag of his own and headed to the bathroom to change.

"Like hell I don't have a choice," he muttered and pulled out the contents. It was indeed clothing but nothing he'd ever be caught dead wearing. It was a black sleeveless shirt with what looked to be splatter-paint of different neon colors and white fur around the neckline that steeped into a sharp V as well as circling around the arms. The pants he pulled out were skinny jeans, also black, and also covered in splatter-paint along with x's painted down the outside seams. He wrinkled his nose, absolutely disgusted, "Gajeel! What the hell is this?"

"You have to wear it!" he called out from the bathroom and Laxus snorted.

"Are you fucking with me right now?" he growled, "This is gaudy as hell!"

The door to the bathroom opened and out stepped Gajeel and Laxus thought he might fall over.

"I have never been more serious in my entire life," he smiled like a fiend over at him in white, straight-legged pants with black stripes up one of the legs and a black shirt with neon pink words spelling out 'All I Do Is Fuck And Party' in large print. He even had neon pink fingerless gloves and had braided brightly colored strands into his hair.

Laxus was dumbfounded, "What in the hell are you wearing?"

"Put it on Sparky! We have to leave in ten minutes!" he barked as he walked over to slide on his black boots.

"Where in the hell are you taking me that we have to dress like this?" he growled, reluctantly taking off his shirt.

"Gihi… you'll find out soon enough," his stupid grin never left his face and his eyes were bright with barely-contained laughter as Laxus actually put it on. He felt immensely stupid wearing the bright ensemble. He crossed his arms miserably and followed him out of the hotel. _Everyone_ they passed on the street stared. They stuck out like a sore thumb and every step they took made Laxus want to run back to the sanctity of their suite. Gajeel walked as if he didn't notice a single odd glance their way, a proud look on his face as he kept repeating the same mantra: that Laxus needed to loosen up, he was about to have a lot of fun.

Gajeel steered them towards some decrepit buildings. The factory district in this town was worse for wear since they mostly thrived off of tourism. In particular, Gajeel was headed for a massive brick building with crumbling smoke stacks and broken windows. Laxus was cold wearing the skimpy shirt in the freezing weather and the foreboding feel from the decaying factory was enough to sour his mood even more.

"I feel so stupid," he hissed, coming up beside him, "Where are you taking me?"

"Can't tell, ya, Sparky. It'll ruin the surprise,"

"Mavis' sakes, are you going to kill me?" he growled as they walked up to the rusted metal doors, "Why did you dress me like an idiot if you were taking me to a chop shop?"

"If I wanted to kill ya I would have done it while you slept," Gajeel snapped, gripping the heavy door and easing it open. It groaned on its hinges, protesting the rude stirring from its deathlike slumber, "Would've saved me all yer whining."

There were three men standing towards the back of the factory. Laxus's skin prickled as he followed Gajeel in. The door slammed shut behind them and with it Laxus's last hope for escape. Gajeel didn't seem perturbed in the least, just strode ahead in all his neon splendor towards the standoffish brutes. Laxus felt like he was walking into a bad drug deal and he followed close on Gajeel's heels, silently cursing the man as they went.

"Is this where we pay to get in?" Gajeel piped, gaining the three's attention. One looked them up and down before nodding and pulling out some papers and instructing them to sign. Gajeel didn't hesitate and Laxus complied, albeit begrudgingly. They looked like waivers and Laxus furrowed his brow as he read the fine print.

"Have you two been here before?"

"Nope," Gajeel muttered as he started pulling out jewels.

"This is open to mages and non-mages so no magic is allowed. There's a magic barrier once you get in so don't be alarmed if you suddenly realize you can't use any magic. And, of course, if you act out of hand we reserve the right to remove you… any questions?"

"Sounds good to me," Gajeel grinned, "What about you, Sparky?"

Laxus seethed, "Great. Sounds _great_."

"Go down that hallway to the elevator. You'll hear the music as soon as you cross the barrier,"

Laxus followed after Gajeel. Their footsteps echoed off cement walls as they made their way to a rickety elevator at the end of a long corridor. Gajeel pulled the rusty metal cage shut and hit the button. The whole contraption shuddered as wheels and gears groaned to life and jolted them down the shaft.

"So, ground rules," Gajeel smirked, "I'm buying all the drinks and you're not going to take anything from anyone else, got it?"

Laxus regarded him coldly, "Where in the hell have to kidnapped me to?"

"Oh, come on, Sparky. You ain't guessed it, yet?" he taunted up at him, "Where else would you wear this kind of shit? With music? And drinks?"

"You took me to an abandoned factory on the outskirts of town. You tell me,"

Gajeel rolled his eyes as the elevator juddered to a halt. He pulled the door open and stepped into the dimly-lit basement. Laxus could see bright colors and strobe lights flashing against the wall up ahead although he heard nothing. The guy up top _had_ made mention about a magic barrier. Maybe it kept the sound in as well? He noticed purple runes inscribed on the floor and walls, making a visible line where Gajeel stopped. He pulled something from his pocket and offered it to Laxus.

"What is this?" he growled warily. Gajeel rolled his eyes yet again.

"Tranquilizers," Gajeel spat sarcastically, "It's aspirin, in case you get a headache."

Laxus gritted his teeth before taking the tablets and chewing them, following Gajeel across the border. Immediately, the music hit him like a solid wall. The vibration shook his body and the sound of a throng of people made his eyes widen. They rounded the bend and were almost immediately greeted by a mass of bodies, jumping and grinding and dancing to the bass that shook the entire room.

"You. Took. Me. To. A. Rave." Laxus yelled, barely able to hear himself over the discord.

"Bickslow told me you secretly love party music and you've never been," Gajeel yelled back, his voice almost completely lost to the music. Everything on him glowed from the black lights and his studs reflected neons up at him. Laxus crossed his arms.

"I'm leaving,"

Gajeel grabbed his arm, "You mean to tell me you're running from the opportunity to grind on my ass for three hours to loud music?"

Laxus narrowed his eyes at him but it seemed to be all the permission Gajeel needed. He stepped forward so that they were chest to chest.

"Loosen up, Sparky," he grinned salaciously, "I'll buy you a couple drinks, we'll dance for a few hours, and we'll go back to the hotel shitfaced and fuck until we pass out. It'll be fun."

Laxus's armor failed and Gajeel rejoiced in his victory by linking them arm-in-arm and towing him in the direction of the bar. Trying to navigate through the scrummage of chaotic dancers was like walking through a windstorm battering them back and forth between walls of gyrating, writhing, sweating bodies. Gajeel's iron grip kept him tethered to him as they pushed their way through the fray and hauled him up by his side at the bar. There were a few barkeepers trying to keep up with the orders and Gajeel motioned one over and pointed to something on the board, yelling a name Laxus didn't catch.

The keep nodded and pulled out three glasses and two double shots. His hands worked quickly, flipping the first glass over and leaving the other two upright. He filled them first with a blue liquid and then with a yellow and finally finished it off with a couple clear liquors. It glowed bright green in the black light and Laxus raised a brow at Gajeel who just motioned for him to watch. Next the man filled the double shots with a different, purple mix and flipped out his lighter and lit them both, balancing them atop the rims of the two cups. He tapped the first shot and it fell into the glass, knocking into the other as well and causing it to fall also, the reaction turning the drinks an almost fluorescent yellow. Laxus's eyes widened when Gajeel slid one of the drinks over to him.

"You chug it," he grinned, "Ready?"

Laxus wrinkled his nose but picked up the glass anyway and at Gajeel mark he tipped it back and swallowed it down. The alcohol was cheap but the mix was sweet and he quickly got the whole drink down with no issue. He heard Gajeel slam the drink on the bar just before he did and the Iron Dragon laughed as blush started to rise to his cheeks from the rush. He signaled at the barkeep who pulled out four shot glasses and filled them each with vodka. Laxus grinned down at the raven who's eyes were already ablaze.

"Two shots," he hollered over the noise, holding up two fingers for emphasis, "First one who downs 'em, wins."

"Wins what?" Laxus smirked to which Gajeel grinned devilishly.

"We can figure that out later. Ready?"

Laxus laughed, "Fuck it, sure."

"Go!"

Like the true alcoholic he was, Gajeel downed both shots without hesitation and slammed them both on the counter almost a second before Laxus could. Laxus couldn't compete with his mastery. Two more shots later and he was even slower than the raven who just laughed and punched him playfully in the shoulder before sliding his money across the counter and getting a couple cups of beer. He grabbed Laxus's hand and pulled him back into the melee, this time heading for the stage.

The music was insanely loud. It drowned out all other noise and the bodies surrounding them pulsated with it, bumped and grinded into each other, pulled each other in and wrapped themselves together to it. They were encircled by people, the disorienting smells of sweat and lust and perfumes and liquor made Laxus's head swim even more than the poison in his system. Gajeel's body was pressed to his, the words on his shirt jumping out more than ever with the lights blaring overhead. He couldn't even make out the lyrics to the song that was playing, just catching tidbits of words singing about getting drunk or high.

It was so hot in the room and Gajeel's body was like a fire on him. Toned muscle was chest to chest with him, hips bumping and grinding against his own to the beat of the music. At some point some girls ended up dancing beside them, grinding their asses and hips against them and threatening to get in between them. Laxus didn't have any intention of losing Gajeel in the mass, though, and neither Gajeel he. They ended up back to front with Laxus grinding against his ass while some girl danced against Gajeel. He didn't really care. Gajeel kept his hands to himself and he was getting a thrill from thrusting against his partner. It wasn't long before he was breathless and hungry and so ready to just leave with Gajeel and tow to ravage him back at the suite. Gajeel seemed to feel his frustration. He stopped his dancing to glance back at his partner, hair disheveled and a licentious smile playing on his lips.

"Another drink?" he mouthed up at him and Laxus nodded before quickly leaning down to kiss him. He dared to slip his tongue out to run across Gajeel's lips only to feel them part and nip at him greedily. Laxus smiled against his roughness and tipped his head to the side to growl into his ear.

"I'm ready for the part where I fuck you until you pass out,"

"I thought we were getting shitfaced first?" Gajeel teased and Laxus just ran his hands down his back in reply, eliciting a shiver from the shorter man, "Another drink then, and then we'll leave."

"Sounds good," he rumbled as Gajeel plucked the mostly-empty cup from his hand and disappeared into the crowd. The girls were all over him then as soon as Gajeel left. He hadn't noticed before but they were talking to him, eyes lusty and breath smelling of alcohol.

"Was that your boyfriend?"

"He's so hot."

"I love your tattoo!"

One of the girls came up with four drinks, handing one to each of them and then shoving one into Laxus's hands. She winked at him as they all tipped back their glassed. Laxus refrained at first, his bleary mind remembering something about Gajeel not wanting him to take drinks from anyone else. But he couldn't remember why so when they watched him expectantly he also tipped the cup back. He didn't drink the whole thing, just a few gulps, but they cheered and jumped up and down to the music again, pulling him with them deeper into the dancing bodies.

After a while he started to feel like his heart was pounding harder than it should have been. The lights and sounds were a little hazy and he had to blink a few times before he could focus on the girls in front of him. One of them had taken their shirt off and was pressing her chest into him, eyes large and pupils expanded so wide he almost couldn't see her irises. Another one was pointing to his cup and goading him to drink the rest of it. He glanced at it, back to her, and shrugged. Right when he was putting the cup to his lips something hit it and it flipped from his hands to hit someone off to his right. The girls shrieked and smiled but Laxus felt something grab his hand and pull him away from them.

He was so confused. They were just having some fun.

He felt jostled and dazed every time someone ran into him, whoever had a vice grip on his hand was dragging him towards the back of the room. When they broke from the mass of people his eyes finally focused on Gajeel's hair and he pulled back, stopping the Iron Dragon in his tracks and dragging him back. Gajeel turned, his eyes agitated and not nearly in as high spirits as he was. Laxus grinned and stepped up to him, pulled him close and crashed into him. So voracious was his appetite for him that he laced his fingers into his hair to keep him from being able to pull away. He sighed into him, grinded his hips against him. The sound of the music was making him shudder, as if it were alive and caressing every part of his body. He didn't want to stop, could have taken the raven right there if he hadn't bitten his lip to the point that he flinched away from him.

"Ah! Gajeel!" Gajeel had him by his wrist, was pulling him after him out past the barrier where all sound dropped to startling silence, "Wait! Wait! Gajeel! Stop!"

Gajeel turned on him, his eyes fiery but not with the kind of heat Laxus thought should be there, "You're fucking high, Laxus."

"What?" he didn't understand why he was so angry. Of course he wasn't high.

"I told you not to take drinks from other people," he growled. Laxus raised a brow at him grabbed his hand and pushed his hips against the raging Iron Dragon's. He tried to run a finger down his jaw but Gajeel batted him away, getting angrier by the second.

"Gajeel… calm down…" he teased, trying to lean down to kiss him, "I'm not high, I just drank too much."

"You're fucking…"

"I'll fuck you, if you let me," he growled, finally finding his lips before Gajeel pushed him away again.

"The only thing you're getting is a long walk in the cold to sober the hell up," Gajeel snarled, grabbing his wrist yet again and pulling him into the elevator. Laxus laughed, unable to not find the whole situation funny. Gajeel was always so serious. He needed to lighten up… which was even funnier because Gajeel had been the one yelling at him to lighten up just an hour prior.

"It's been more than an hour," Gajeel rolled his eyes and Laxus grinned.

"What? Really? Holy shit…" he laughed, "Time flies."

"Yeah, time flies," Gajeel muttered, stepping off the platform and walking past the bouncers. Laxus hurried after him, through the heavy metal door, and out into the chill.

He didn't understand much of their trip home. He felt like he was floating or flying. It was both hard to keep up with Gajeel but also he was leaving him in his dust. He felt warm, like his whole body was blushing. The air on his skin was crisp and alive and forming microscopic snowflakes on the hairs of his arms. Occasionally, Gajeel would touch him and his flesh would light on fire from the touch. He wanted to kiss him so badly but Gajeel wouldn't let him, just kept telling him to get back to the hotel. His heart just felt so full he couldn't stand it. How do you contain yourself when you love someone so much? He found he kept asking how far back to the hotel, he couldn't wait to put his hands on Gajeel, to feel his heat, kiss his lips, finger him, fuck him, just _be_ with him. Several times Gajeel got flustered and his cheeks would flush bright red as he pushed him along.

He glanced up and caught sight of the moon. Dear gods, it was beautiful. Everything it's light touched was striking. It even formed a halo around Gajeel's jet black hair. When he let out a breath the particles were miniscule prisms refracting the tiniest rainbows at him. It was like the whole world was washed in silver. Maybe it was the silver from the mines from a time long ago…

Gajeel gripped onto his collar and dragged him inside the hotel. Shit, when did they get there? He didn't remember walking by the bamboo forest. He was washed over with the scents of them mingling together in the space and even the hairs on his neck stood on end with elation from it. He walked over to the bed and fell into it. It was so soft, he could have sworn he could feel every single strand as it ran across his skin. He felt hands grabbing at his boots, pulling them from his feet and stripping them bare of his socks. Hands tugged at his belt and he grinned, pushing himself up onto his elbows to look down at Gajeel as he worked to tear him apart.

"Are we going to fuck now?" he grinned and Gajeel shot him a venomous look.

"Yer going ta bed," his voice was gruff as he ripped the belt off of him and his hands when to unbuckle his pants.

"But I don't want to _go ta bed_ ," he dropped each word in the exact same way Gajeel did, with that strange rough accent he picked up from time to time when he was exasperated, and he noticed Gajeel's eyes narrow up at him, "I want to have sex."

Gajeel rolled his eyes as he shimmied his jeans from his hips, "You'll thank me tomorrow."

"Mmm… I don't think I will. This is the last night we'll be here. I'm sure I'll just be pissed,"

"Then you'll get over it, won't you?" he bit up at him, leaning a knee onto the mattress as he reached for the bottom of Laxus's shirt. Laxus lifted himself up the rest of the way so that his face was just a few inches away from Gajeel's. Gajeel didn't seem the least bit startled, just ripped the hem of his shirt upwards over his head and arms.

"Lay down," he instructed and left him, walking over to the sink to draw a glass of water.

"Gajeeel…" Laxus called after him, "Please?"

"No."

He tilted his head back and watched the ceiling, noticing finite details he hadn't seen the night before. He just felt so alive, so happy. Why did Gajeel have to be such a killjoy? He just wanted to have sex. He could just imagine how amazing it would feel since he was like this. Just thinking about it sent a thrill through his groin and he smiled, lulling his head to the side to watch Gajeel out of the corner of his eyes. His studs glittered in the faint light. His muscles were taught under his skin and a scowl was set into his face. Was it really so bad that he was high? He didn't care, so why did Gajeel care so much?

Gajeel lumbered back over to him and placed the glass of water on the nightstand. He laid a hand on his shoulder gently, some of his frustration finally starting to abate.

"Let's go to bed,"

Laxus felt like a child, giddy and restless and definitely not ready to go to sleep. He leaned over and kissed Gajeel's hand, "But I want to have sex,"

Gajeel rolled his eyes, "Why do you want to have sex so badly?"

"Because I love you… and that's what you do when you want to show someone you love them,"

Gajeel's eyes widened and he was silent for a minute, "Laxus, you're very drunk and you're _very_ high."

"Ehh?" he leaned forward as if to put emphasis on his words, "So what if I am? I love you when I'm sober, too."

Gajeel's face became stoic as he looked down at him but his eyes spoke volumes. They were dancing like candles hidden behind rose-colored glass. They were overwhelmed and full and beautiful. _Gods alive_ , his eyes were beautiful.

"Does me loving you scare you?" he pressed, unable to control himself in even the smallest bit. What would happen if he didn't like Gajeel's answer? Then what?

"No… no it doesn't," he muttered, not moving his eyes from Laxus's, "I just… I think you're making a mistake."

Laxus snorted, "A mistake? Why in the hell would I be making a mistake?"

"There's a million better people in this world for you, Laxus. People who aren't murderers, or thieves, or… fucked up…"

"You're not fucked up," Laxus hissed, for some reason still unable to stop smiling up at the raven dumbly, "Why don't you believe me?"

"This isn't a conversation for when yer high off your ass, Sparky," Gajeel muttered but Laxus refused to let up.

"Why do you think so highly of me? I've done bad shit too,"

Gajeel's lip curled up in a snarl, "Ya mean when you got inta a fight with your granddaddy and threw a tantrum big enough to involve the entire guild?"

"I threatened to _kill_ the people of Magnolia," he was still smiling. Why in the hell was he still smiling? This wasn't funny anymore, this was an actual fight.

"But you _didn't_ , Laxus. That's the difference between you and me. I did and you didn't. Do ya understand that? You love a _murderer_ ," Gajeel's eyes were wide and his pupils small slivers floating like helpless boats in a sea of blood red as he held Laxus's gaze, "And ya don't think that maybe ya can find someone a little better for you than a murderer?"

Where he found the confidence Laxus had no idea but he somehow had absolutely no qualms with smirking up at the hopeless raven staring down at him, "I love you, Gajeel Redfox. Do you love me?"

"Do… do I love you?" Gajeel seemed incredulous, "What do you mean, do I love you?"

"It's a yes or no question. It's pretty fucking simple," Laxus pressed and somehow Gajeel's eyes widened even more.

"Simple? You think it's simple?" Gajeel's voice had a touch of feverish rage bubbling up despite how he was trying to remain calm, "Laxus… to me, you're… you're…"

"I'm what?" he waited patiently as Gajeel fought to control his emotions and align them with what he wanted to say. Laxus was jealous. He was so articulate when he wanted to be. He always figured out how to voice what he really wanted when prompted to do so. Laxus felt he always seemed to just freeze up.

"You're like a _god_ to me," Gajeel was angry and also suddenly incredibly fragile. Laxus was surprised the words had actually come out of his mouth and he was stuck in a shocked silence as the Iron Dragon finally unfolded before him like some origami creation returning to its original raw form, "You're this untouchable thing. I can't look at you without thinking about everything wrong I've done and how I haven't answered for it and yet here you are, wrecking through everything I thought I knew I was by saying stupid shit like you love me. _Love you_? Fuck, I dunno, Laxus. Does… does the moon love the sun? It couldn't shine at night without the sun, it wouldn't be beautiful or wax and wane the way it does without the sun. But does the moon love something it can't be on the same plane of existence with? It could worship the sun, maybe, adore it even. But _love_? Not healthily. Not like maybe the sky would or the clouds or the earth."

Laxus didn't miss a beat, just smirked. He had to give the raven credit. He was so extremely lost in his own self-hate that he thought that meant he couldn't love someone else? Or accept love in return? How intense does loathing have to be to cause a person to be like that? Did Laxus have to chase it away every single time? He could do that, he concluded. He was stubborn too. Maybe Gajeel had a silver tongue and could speak poetically about things he obsessed over, call it the songwriter in him, maybe. Laxus couldn't be eloquent like that, but he could sure as hell try.

"Can the moon love the sun?" Laxus grinned, "Sure it can. There's a legend that comes from some of the old cultures down south that believes the moon not only loved the sun but she loved the sun enough to die for him. Back in the time when gods walked the earth, she was a princess who fell in love with a warrior. Her father killed her because she wanted to run away with him and scattered the pieces of her body into thirteen trees. The sun, also madly in love with the moon, searched for her broken pieces in all thirteen trees and finally found her reborn in the last tree. So he reclaimed her and eventually they were reborn as the sun and the moon that we see in the sky."

Gajeel seemed speechless. He dropped his eyes to the ground and clenched his teeth, casting about for something to retort back to him but coming up short. Laxus basked in his own glory while he waited.

"Bet ya didn't expect shit like that outta me, eh?"

Gajeel sighed, placed his hands on Laxus's knees and a look of resignation came to his face, "I don't deserve you, Laxus. You're too good for me."

Well, that did it. The smile that had been glued to his face finally disappeared.

"You don't deserve me?" he snorted as if the entire idea was the most ridiculous thing he'd ever heard, "What is this? You don't deserve Levy, you don't deserve me… who _do_ you deserve, Gajeel? Who? Someone who will berate you? What about someone who'll beat you? Rape you, maybe? Did you forget, I've done terrible things to _you_ , Gajeel, not just the guild?"

Gajeel's eyes widened and a laugh snuck it's way past Laxus's lips.

"Did you… did you _forget_ that I hurt you, Gajeel?"

Gajeel straightened to his full height then, completely recoiled from him, "You… you weren't yourself,"

"But I still did it, Gajeel. It doesn't matter what state of mind I was in when it happened, it still happened. Just like you, right?"

"That… that was _nothing_ like me… you were drugged, Laxus."

"And you didn't think you had any other choice, Gajeel," Laxus was shaking and he was sure that in the silence Gajeel could probably hear his bones knocking against each other as his body tried to contain the swell of emotions he felt. He could tell Gajeel was shocked. He didn't know what to say anymore, just stared at the ground with disbelief.

"I think… we're getting off the subject," Laxus finally resumed, collecting what was left of his frazzled thoughts, "I'm not asking you to love yourself. Loving yourself is hard and ugly and sometimes seems impossible. That's not something I'm asking you to do because, hell, that's not even something I can do."

Gajeel's eyes were locked on him. He was stunned, like a mouse caught in the gaze of a predator before it had a chance to dart away. He couldn't believe the words coming from the blonde on the bed before him. Laxus couldn't love himself? This man who walked and lived like he believed he was a god among insects didn't love himself? How could that even be possible? And over something like what he did when he was drugged out of his mind? Gajeel just couldn't believe it and he felt like his heart was bleeding for him. He knew so viscerally how that felt.

"I'm asking you a simple question: do you love me? You can say you don't, that's fine. I won't think any less of you,"

For some reason, this time Gajeel didn't feel the need to hesitate, "Of course I love you."

"You… you do?"

"Absolutely," Gajeel's voice held conviction and it threatened to make Laxus's smile creep back to his face. But he had other things on his mind; a point he wanted to make. He was going to be cruel again.

"Then make love to me,"

"I… make love to you?" Gajeel was confused.

"Make love to me," Laxus stated it sternly, almost as if it were a command. He took a steadying breath; he could do this. He leaned back on the palms of his hands and summoned some more of the endless courage he seemed to have and met Gajeel's gaze steadily, "Come and touch your god, Gajeel Redfox. Find out for yourself that he's a man just like you."

For a moment, Gajeel just stared down at him, his mood sinking ever lower from the angry point it had been at until finally the rest of his irritation dissipated with an exasperated sigh. He crossed his arms, then, and looked off to the side as he thought to himself. Laxus didn't want him to think himself out of it again so he clicked his teeth.

"Does making love to your god intimidate you, Gajeel?"

Those red eyes snapped back up at him and the rest of what was holding him back seemed to melt away from the ire Laxus's words awoke in him.

"Fine…" he growled and a strange powerful aura started to seep from his pores and into the air. It wasn't like the scent of their lust the past day. It was different and strikingly familiar. Laxus recognized it immediately as the same scent he'd experienced from the Iron Mage deep in the forest, a time like ages ago, "But you'd better remember this, Laxus Dreyar."

"Or else?" Laxus smirked up at him even as green sparks danced from Gajeel's fingers. He took hold of Laxus's wrists, crossed them above his head and with iron sealed them together. Laxus toppled backwards onto the bed, forced to watch Gajeel strip from the very bottom of his line of sight.

"I'll have to fuck you twice as hard next time."

He approached Laxus in the same way a panther does its helpless prey, deliberately and mightily. After seeing Gajeel at his weakest he had forgotten how terrifyingly domineering this man could be. He was carnivorous and insatiable, his eyes raked across Laxus's body as if he were his fresh victim. He moved smoothly onto the bed. He wasn't scared of the fair body beneath him anymore and for the first time was allowed to conquer it, so he sat astride Laxus's hips and leaned down over him. Those ebony locks were like a curtain blocking the outside world. For a short while, all the earth was going to be was just the two of them. Laxus's heart shuddered at the tortuous way Gajeel pressed his lips to his throat, almost like a threat. Laxus arched his back at rough fingers enfilading his ribs.

"So if I'm a god does that make you a devil?" Laxus rasped as Gajeel's lips desolated his neck. He swirled his tongue in a circle around his soft flesh, bit into him and sucked ravenously at him. It sent heat to his groin and already his member throbbed with lust. Laxus had to bite back the need. He had been at this man's mercy once before, but only briefly. He hadn't incited some frantic affection from an infatuated lover. Gajeel didn't want him to burn in a brilliant white flame the way Laxus had done to him last night. This man wanted a slow, merciless possession that brought rapturous torment.

Gajeel smiled against the curve of his jaw and pulled back, perching atop him proudly as he thought about Laxus's words. Those lips curled into an indecent grin so wide his sharp teeth glistened down at him menacingly.

"I can be a devil if you want," he pushed his hips into Laxus's, making the blonde swallow hard. He leaned over him slowly and kissed him deeply, as if he were trying to steal his soul directly from Laxus's mouth. His tongue invaded and swept against his own and the entire time he grinded his hips against the blonde's. He started gently, sliding his member up the full length of Laxus's before retreated to stoke up again that fire with more ferocity. He pressed harder, swept up his hips faster, kissed him deeper. Laxus thought he was being consumed deliberately, passionately, and he frantically climbed towards the euphoria he knew well. He was breathing raggedly, was so ready to blow when Gajeel retreated again except permanently this time, and he growled from the indignation of it, pushing his hips up to try and catch the orgasm that fled from him just when he was about to taste it.

Gajeel's lips found themselves back at his jugular, digging sharp teeth into soft tissue and making Laxus hold his breath. His hands caressed his chest as his mouth made its way down, sucking onto his pale skin purple marks as he headed for a new deprivation to unleash. He found his way to his nipple, licked at it gently and sucked, drawing a desperate moan from the blonde as his body craved more. Gajeel complied, running canines down the sensitive flesh and licking over the tender trail with his tongue before sucking hungrily again. Laxus shivered, licked his lips and gritted his teeth to try to contain the desire that was building in his groin. It was painful, this demand, and it gnawed at his sanity with every sensational pull from Gajeel's mouth.

He left him again, this time letting his fingers mark the trail for his next target. Gajeel dug his nails into Laxus's skin, down his ribs, stomach, naval, and with them too did his body slip from the bed to kneel at Laxus's feet. He gripped his thighs roughly and spread his legs, gazing at the raging lust that had so shamefully been begging to be satisfied. Gajeel didn't touch it, though, still didn't allow Laxus the release he needed. Instead, he let lithe fingers slip down to grips his knees and lift his heels so they rested on the edge of the bed.

"Don't move," he growled as he dug his teeth into the soft skin of Laxus's thigh. Laxus moaned disgracefully as Gajeel disappeared between his thighs, felt his hot breath as he travelled down to run his tongue against his heat.

"Gajeel…!"

He gripped his ass severely and revealed his opening, helping himself. He licked against his heat, pressed a finger against it and eased in. Laxus arched his back in an attempt to move his hips from the invasion but Gajeel twisted inside of him and pushed in another finger, stretching him and allowing him to get deeper penetration and sweep against the nerves that had him rolling with pleasure just a few hours prior.

"Gajeel…! That hurts!" he breathed but Gajeel didn't stop, he fucked him slowly with his fingers until he felt he was stretched enough to handle another.

"Relax, fairy, it gets really good if you relax…"

He hit it, that sweet spot that made Laxus's entire body shiver with pleasure. Gajeel grinned and pressed against it again, licking his lips when a strangled moan from the blonde filled the air. He became more aggressive, pushing harder and faster and held Laxus's hips down as his legs shivered more and more violently from his applications. The air was filled with his voice, moaning and shaking as he became further and further lost in his ecstasy.

"Fuck, Gajeel, stop!" he begged, his voice shuddering past his lips.

He disregarded him entirely. In fact, he brought his other hand up to fondle his balls and leaned forward onto his heels so that he could press his lips against Laxus's stiff member. He ran his tongue up the length of his tender flesh, sucked at his vein and then took his head into his mouth. Laxus's voice let loose a strangled cry as Gajeel slipped down his length just as he brushed his sweet spot. It was sinfully erotic to hear the Thunder God completely at his mercy, so lost in his own pleasure that he didn't even care to restrain his voice anymore. Gajeel relished it, sucked him harder and fingered him in rhythm. The shivering in his hips was delicious and Laxus felt he was going to go mad from the extreme pleasure. He wanted to bite into his knuckle but he couldn't, his hands bound in iron that didn't relent against his wrists when he tried to bring them down. He was rocketing towards and intense orgasm, a pleasure he already knew he'd not experienced before. He was so close, almost at his breaking point when once again Gajeel pulled from him.

The frustration was too much for him to bear. He didn't even care that a curse sang from the back of his throat at the sudden drop.

"Goddammit! Gajeel! Fuck!" he was furious. He was _right there_. His dick throbbed painfully, needed him to release just as much as he wanted to. But Gajeel was a malevolent lover and he wanted the Lightning God to beg before he got what he wanted.

"Mm… a god that takes his own name in vain… how sinful of you, Laxus," his words dripped like melted wax from his lips and made him shiver. He pressed his dick against his ass, slipped it up and down his heat before pushing into him slowly. One. Inch. At. A. Time, "Maybe you are just a man, after all."

Laxus pulled in a gasp of air as Gajeel slowly sheathed himself inside of him. The bastard didn't seem riled in the least, just held his position as he waited for Laxus to relax. He pulled out with a tortuous slowness that teased Laxus's molten core back to life. His member twitched, anguished by a dissolute thirst so fierce it made Laxus see red. Gods alive, Gajeel was a sadistic tormentor. He grazed his spot, glided over it gently and slowly began to crash into it. Laxus was lost in it, that building pressure making him moan every time he hit a new height. The previous instances were nothing compared to this scorching wildfire Gajeel stoked back to life.

Gajeel forged into him ruthlessly, gripped his ravenous shaft and made him let out a wanton cry. He was an animal devouring him alive until there was nothing left. His hips were shivering and he felt the liquid fire pooling in his groin, cursed as he thought that Gajeel might steal this from him yet again. Finally, this didn't seem the case and Gajeel let him tumble into an ecstasy so consuming he didn't think it possible. It exploded through his veins and every muscle in his body tensed as he released, a curse hurling from his mouth at the ferocity of it all. His hips trembled relentlessly and he peeked up just in time to see Gajeel's head dip between his legs.

"G-Gajeel…! Fucking hell!"

The Iron Dragon sucked his member hungrily and his entire body shook from it again. His dick was still so sensitive that his tongue licking up his length made him see stars all over again. When Gajeel released him he was breathless and exhausted and finally sober. Gajeel delicately removed the makeshift cuffs from Laxus's wrists who didn't even have it in him to complain about the soreness or even clean himself up. He was exhausted and every inch of him almost painfully tender. He collapsed into the sheets, the licentious ring of a devil's laugh in his ear as he pulled the blankets around himself. Gajeel's body was beside his in an instant and Laxus mumbled quietly to the raven as he started to drift to sleep.

"Gajeel?"

"Yeah?"

"I love you."

"I love you, too."


	45. Chapter 45

Laxus was incredibly hungover.

Waking up felt like rising from the dead. He had to claw his way out of the grave, the heavy pressure on his limbs making it almost impossible to get free. He felt dirty and sore; his tongue stuck to the roof of his mouth and his throat was closed. Everything tasted like cotton and his mind was hazy. His head throbbed, a sledgehammer against his brain. Gods alive, he'd never been so hungover in his entire life, not even that one time he went on a bender with Bickslow and Evergreen.

The feel of tender fingers running through his hair pulled him further back into the real world. He could feel breath against his face and taste the spice of Gajeel on the tip of his tongue. He forced his eyes open, squinting into the dim light and found himself staring into Gajeel's chest, still covered in soft bruises from the day before.

"Decide ta join the living?" his voice was husky and soft, a sound that reminded Laxus of a jaguar's purr, "How's yer head?"

"Feels like hell," Laxus could barely get his voice out and it made his head buzz terribly to speak, "Goddamn…"

He nuzzled into Gajeel's chest as he stretched, reaching for something on the nightstand and chuckling when Laxus wrapped his arms around his waist. He brought back a glass of water and a couple of pills which Laxus downed voraciously.

"Last night got little wild, eh?"

"Just a little," Laxus mumbled, rubbing his face back into Gajeel's chest and fighting off the lethargy that was coaxing him to slip back to sleep.

"I told ya not to take anythin' from anyone else," the raven teased, taming the blonde hairs at the side of Laxus's face gently, "Ya didn't listen,"

"Are ya really gonna blame me for something I did while I was drunk?" Laxus growled, slowly starting to remember bits and pieces from the night, "B'sides, I blame you."

"Gihi, me? How was that my fault?"

"You didn't take good enough care of me, obviously,"

"Oh? I didn't, eh?" he could hear the grin on Gajeel's face even though he didn't see it. Laxus sighed and drew his hand across Gajeel's ribs, catching sight of a dark splotch on his skin and raised a brow at the bruises that had starting spotting his wrists. He clicked his teeth. He'd forgotten that Gajeel had cuffed him, the absolute freak. He'd been so natural at it too, didn't fumble around or ask permission. He'd had Laxus just the way he'd wanted him. He ran his tongue against his teeth as a quick flash of pleasure roused his body at the memory.

He'd never been under someone's power like that before… his mind reeled just thinking about it…

"Well… maybe you took care of me later," Laxus smiled against his chest and heard Gajeel suck in a breath. He took hold of Laxus's hand and flipped it over, looking over the damage he'd done the night before.

"Shit… I didn't mean ta do that," he mumbled.

Laxus crossed his arms and rested his chin against his forearms, finally lifting himself up enough to meet Gajeel's ruby eyes, "T's fine. It doesn't hurt."

"Guess I need ta be a little more careful, eh, fairy?" Gajeel stretched beneath him and Laxus could hear his bones creak. He let out a sigh and rested his hands at the small of Laxus's back, his arms too short to make it all the way to his hips.

"Mm… I don't like it when you call me fairy," Laxus muttered, tilting his head to the side as he studied the curve of Gajeel's jaw. He hadn't shaved the past couple of days and so short black hair was already trying to fight its way across his jawline and cheeks.

"Ya don't like Sparky either," he smirked, rubbing his fingers gently up and down Laxus's spine.

"Mph…"

"It's just 'cuz I like how light your skin is," his smile turned a little soft as he spoke and his red eyes gentle, "Like porcelain…"

Laxus raised a brow at him and Gajeel darted his eyes to the side, slightly nervous.

"Er… you know… and blonde… shit like that," he muttered as his cheeks flared. Laxus grinned.

"And Sparky?"

"Cuz you're _electrifying_ ,"

Laxus snorted, "You and your weird fuckin' pet names. As long as you don't call me that in bed, whatever, I guess."

Gajeel's smile widened a little bit more and Laxus clicked his teeth, "You called me a fairy in bed last night."

"Gihi… yeah… but totally not because I thought you were actin' fragile or anything,"

Laxus rolled his eyes, "Whatever you say _Redfox_."

Gajeel's smile disappeared just slightly, "Don't use my last name like that."

"Oh? But you can call me whatever you want?"

"Friends don't call me by my last name," he growled, "So you sure as hell ain't."

"Fine," he conceded, not willing to fight over it, "Should I just call you asshole instead?"

"I'm sure you'll think of something,"

"Hmph," they settled into an amiable silence. Gajeel seemed content to just explore Laxus's body with his hands, tracing invisible designs across his back, up his shoulders, and ultimately ending up back at his hair. For a brief second, he trailed his fingertips across the sharp edges of his scar, making Laxus's eyes flutter shut as he sighed against the feeling. For a man with such rough, calloused hands, Gajeel had a feather light touch and it almost eased him back to sleep. He could feel the man's heartbeat beneath him, rose and fell with each steady breath. Laxus realized he really liked this closeness and sort of wished it wouldn't have to end.

"So…" Gajeel's voice shattered the quiet and Laxus opened an eye to him, "How much of last night do you remember?"

Laxus paused, thinking, "All of it."

"Ah… shit…" Gajeel laughed tensely.

"What? Say something you didn't mean?" Laxus smirked. He told himself he wasn't upset or disappointed but there was a part of himself that immediately felt dejected. He quickly reminded himself just how long they'd been dating… which officially had only been two days even thought they'd spent much longer than that being intimate. He couldn't really blame the man for not feeling the same way.

"No…" he sighed, though Laxus could see the way the vein in his neck twitched tensely as he spoke, "It's more like I said too much."

Laxus fell into silence at that. The raven had always been extremely transparent when he was drunk. Although his own self-doubts were immediately banished he was still concerned. Gajeel had said _a lot_ last night… and some of it was extremely revealing. It explained a few things about the way he acted, Laxus supposed, and the way he regarded the Lightning Mage. But it wasn't good or healthy. But then, Laxus couldn't say he was too far from the same way.

"I probably sounded fucking nuts," he muttered.

"Yeah…" Laxus mused and could almost feel Gajeel's inward cringe, "We need to work on your self-confidence,"

Gajeel's brow furrowed and he shot Laxus a purely confused look, "I don't think we're talking about the same things."

"Oh, you meant calling me a god? Nah, that was sexy as hell," he leaned forward, grinding his hips against Gajeel's thighs as if to give what he was saying more meaning and Gajeel narrowed his eyes at the blonde, clearly put off. Laxus's smile vanished and he dropped his voice, suddenly very serious, "No, the shit that pissed me off was you saying you're not good enough for anyone."

Gajeel clicked his teeth and turned his head to the side. He pulled up his knee under the blankets, forcing Laxus to have to readjust his position to rest between his legs. He settled back on his chest, this time sliding up to rest a little closer to the raven's face.

"Oi, you listening to me?"

"Before we start arguing and ruin the weekend, why don't we just agree that this is something we can't see eye to eye on," Gajeel's words were deliberate and they took Laxus back for a moment.

"If you think I'm lettin' you off that easy, you're in for a rude awakening," Laxus grinned.

"Yeah, yeah," Gajeel bit back at him, trying to shut him down yet again. Laxus sighed heavily. Getting angry with him wouldn't do any good; would probably only validate his negative thoughts. He hated how he could never find the right words to say. He huffed, though, and decided to just go for it.

"Do you know how many things there are that I admire about you?" Laxus murmured and he could feel the muscles of Gajeel's chest tighten.

"Lax-"

"You don't back down from a challenge, even when you think you'll lose,"

"Neither do you,"

"You'll do anything for your friends, your guild, your family…"

"So would almost everyone else in Fairy Tail, Laxus,"

"You don't back down from the hard decisions, you face them head on, no matter what that means," Gajeel clicked his teeth but this time he didn't repudiate Laxus's words. He reached for Gajeel's hand beneath the blankets, enjoying the way his tan skin clashed against his own as they laced fingers. Gajeel relaxed slightly and Laxus propped his cheek against his palm as he continued, "You're one of the strongest men I know… one of the strongest Mages I know…"

"That's bullshit," Gajeel whispered but there was no conviction in his voice.

"You know… Hajime told me about how you saved his life."

"Yeah… after I took the sight in one 'a his eyes," Gajeel growled bitterly. Laxus refused to budge.

"Blinded in one eye is a lot less than death, Gajeel. He got a chance to live, get married, have a kid and move on from Phantom Lord. His other two options were to die or stay until the guild was disbanded and he had no idea that would happen. He wouldn't have the life he has now without you fighting back… And Juvia-"

"What about, Juvia?" Gajeel snapped, suddenly stiff and defensive.

"Juvia thinks the world of you,"

He could feel his body getting tense again, as if it could shield him against the sudden anger that was lighting up in his chest, _"I fucking had my way with her, Laxus,"_

"You know that's not how she sees it,"

He jerked from him then, taking his hand away and pushing himself up onto his hands, his teeth clenched as if he were ready to fight, "She was _conditioned_ to think like that… like it was all _her fault_."

Laxus also pushed himself up to kneel before him, not allowing him a chance to escape if Gajeel decided to end the conversation, "And so were you."

Gajeel shrank back from him, brows drawn together in rage and confusion, "What did you day?"

"I said so were you."

The look on Gajeel's face was similar to if Laxus had just slapped him and it startled the blonde slightly, "I… No, I wasn't."

"You said it yourself, Gajeel, and even Hajime said it, that he got you when you were young. Jose groomed you since you were a kid to do anything for the guild, no matter what it was. So when he told you that you had to kill, you did it, because what would happen to you if you didn't? You'd be killed or kicked out of the only place that you'd been able to call home since Metalicana left,"

"Watch it…"

Laxus gritted his teeth, feeling more and more frustrated as he realized he wasn't getting anywhere. He didn't know what compelled him to do so, maybe just the need to do _something_ , but he grabbed Gajeel's knees and dragged him towards him. His eyes were wide and some of his fire extinguished when Laxus's hands landed solidly on either side of him.

"You're not a bad man, Gajeel, you've just made bad choices. There's a difference."

"Oh, fuck off with that shit," he bit back, eyes still full of indignation, "Even you said you didn't forgive yourself."

Laxus refused to let him win, although his words did strike him for a moment, "Yes but I don't hate myself for what happened."

Gajeel stared up at him but didn't respond, clearly confused. He didn't see a difference between the two and Laxus pressed his point, leaning down a little to be closer to the Iron Dragon. He didn't want Gajeel to think he was upset or angry, didn't want their weekend to end in another fight.

"I don't forgive what happened because what I did to you was awful, but hating myself wouldn't fix it… Juvia showed me that," Gajeel's eyes widened at that but he kept Laxus's gaze, for once not breaking away or trying to hide, "Hating myself won't change what happened and won't make me a better person… but loving you has."

Gajeel's face flushed with red at that and the rest of his fire had been snuffed. He crossed his arms and turned his head to the side as if it could hide the rose that colored him down his neck.

"Did ya get that shit from Juvia too?" he muttered and Laxus smiled gently down at him.

"Nope," he teased, running his hands up tanned thighs and hips, "Came up with that by myself."

"Aren't you just full of surprises…" Gajeel breathed, his eyes fluttering shut at he stopped Laxus's procession at his waist, "If ya don't stop we won't get outta here before checkout."

"And?"

"And then I'll have to pay for three nights instead of two."

Laxus grinned down at him devilishly, "All you're doing is convincing me not to let you up,"

Gajeel rolled his eyes and went to push him off but Laxus caught hold of his wrists and forced them down. Gajeel's eyes widened slightly and he gritted his teeth.

"Laxus… my wrists…" he hissed, trying to jerk away but finding that under the larger man's weight he was unable to.

"Calm down, you know I won't hurt you," Laxus leaned down and met his anxious scarlet eyes, "You got to hold me down and take what you wanted…"

"Yee… but you asked fer it," he seemed to sink into the mattress, taking a deep breath to calm his nerves, "I ain't warnin' you again."

Laxus leaned down to kiss his neck, completely ignoring the comment.

"Would it be so bad if we stayed _one_ more day?" he murmured against his skin, feeing a tremor go through the raven beneath him. Gajeel clicked his teeth. In a swift motion, he arched his back and twisted, using his hip to knock Laxus's leg out from under him and roll on top of the blonde. Laxus blinked, not quite sure what had just happened; he barely realized that his mind was spinning from the sudden movement and Gajeel was straddling him with a smug look on his face. He rubbed the side of his head in an attempt to calm his sudden vertigo.

"Did… did you just use a wrestling move on me?" Laxus growled, feeling much more nauseous than just moments before.

Gajeel winked at him and jumped off the bed, his movements fluid and lithe compared to Laxus as he fumbled to sit up, head still swimming uncomfortably.

"Let's get cleaned up, Sparky," he called over his shoulder as he headed for the bathroom, "I'm sure Mira's chomping at the bit to hear how yer weekend went."

Laxus grunted and watched as he disappeared from view. He let out a tense sigh and he stood slowly, running a hand down the back of his neck as he did so. His first step was shaky and a dull soreness in his hips made its presence known, but he pushed it to the back of his mind as he crossed the suite after the object of his desire. As he passed the window, a flutter of motion caught his eye and for a moment he paused and stared, looking to see where it could have come from. His eyes focused for a moment on the bamboo forest and he found he couldn't help scanning the stalks to see if someone was there. Maybe it was lingering paranoia after everything he'd been through the past few months or maybe it was spurred on by the withdrawal his body was suffering from, but he suddenly felt as if he were being watched from the sea of green; what was once a wall to the outside world was suddenly thick camouflage for an intruder. He set his jaw just as his eyes made out a shape in the haze and his heart suddenly slammed in his chest, turning his veins to ice.

 _There's someone out there…_

"Sparky?" Gajeel's voice interrupted his sudden spiral and he tore his gaze from the window, "You gonna join me or what?"

He hesitated, looked back to the place where he saw the shadow and released the clench in his teeth, "Yeah… coming."

Whatever he had seen was gone and he shook the lingering delusion from his mind as he turned into the bathroom where Gajeel was waiting, a fire in his eyes tempting him to forget whatever it was that had bothered him as he entered. His hands were on Gajeel's waist in and instant, lips searching for raven. The irrational fear melted like ice under the hot water and he scolded himself for ever thinking something so stupid in the first place. What reason would anyone have to follow them out here?

They just barely made it to checkout in time, gaining yet more critical looks from the attendant. Laxus had realized that none of his shirts were high enough to conceal the generous amount of marks Gajeel had left on him and while Gajeel had his long black hair to hide what Laxus had left, his own hair was cropped short and spiked back. Between his neck and his wrists he was sure he looked like a sight but his pride wouldn't let him accept Gajeel's scarf to help cover them up.

"Everyone at the guild will see them," Gajeel smirked over at him, "You _sure_ you don't want it?"

"Just don't leave them so high up next time," he growled as they made their way to the train station.

"People will ask questions."

Laxus glanced over at him from the corner of his eye, "Would you rather they not?"

"I don't care," Gajeel sighed, shoving his hands into his pockets as they walked, "Figured you wouldn't, though."

"I'll just send 'em your way, how's that?" Laxus grinned and Gajeel just huffed in reply, although it wasn't mean spirited, "Do ya have any ground rules for when we get back to the guild?"

"Eh? What do you mean?"

Laxus smiled softly down at him, "Can I hold your hand at the guild?"

Gajeel blinked a couple of times before pulling his gaze from the blonde, "Don't see why not."

Laxus walked a little closer to him, "Can I kiss you?"

Blush started heating up Gajeel's neck despite how he was trying to keep it subdued, "Sure."

"Is there anything I'm _not_ allowed to do?" Laxus pressed but Gajeel didn't answer right away. He stopped and turned to him, red eyes sparking as he reached out and picked up Laxus's hand.

"If I really cared about what other people thought-" he murmured, pulling Laxus's ring finger to his face and letting his lips brush against his knuckles gently as he spoke, bashful warmth quickly overtaking his face, "-I wouldn't have made us matching rings, would I?"

Laxus felt like his circuits had suddenly been fried as Gajeel planted a light kiss against the silver band and dropped his hand, picking up his pace down the sidewalk again. Laxus was close on his heels, his heart shuttering erratically in his chest and his stomach fluttering. Damn, he'd really liked that.

"I was just worried you wouldn't want the attention… we're not exactly subtle."

Gajeel just smirked, "I've been stared at for one reason or another my whole life. It doesn't bother me anymore."

"Even when it's your guildmates?"

He just rolled his eyes, his easy-going smile never leaving his face, and Laxus couldn't help but feel incomprehensibly warm by the raven's side, "Especially if it's my guildmates."


	46. Chapter 46

**Sorry for the long wait for this one, guys. A couple weeks ago I literally had the worst week of my life. Things didn't turn out as bad as we thought they would but I was still given the scare of my life. I'm sorry if it seems choppy but I've just been slowly trying to chip away at this one for you guys.**

 **Thank you for your patience and I hope you enjoy!**

The trip home was lazy. Gajeel chewed on peppermint leaves while they were on the train and rested his head on Laxus's lap, his feet propped up against the window. Laxus didn't have as much of an issue with motion sickness as the other Slayers, his mostly manifesting if it was an especially rocky ride, and Gajeel seemed just content to lay with eyes half open for the two-hour train ride back to Magnolia. For Gajeel's sake, they mostly sat in silence so he could focus on keeping his stomach from knotting too violently with the jostling of the train car. As the train station loomed in the distance, Laxus felt a pang of melancholy that truly their little retreat was finally over and secretly worried that, despite Gajeel's reassurances, their amorous spell would be broken as soon as they stepped foot back at home.

To his surprise, it was actually Gajeel who initiated their touch as they exited the train, dipping his hand down to brush Laxus's palm and intertwine their fingers. He pulled the blonde behind him, hasty to get off the train and onto solid ground. He didn't release him even as they made their way through the train station, down the cobblestone streets, and home to drop off their things. Laxus glanced at himself once more in the mirror as he changed into a familiar collared shirt and grabbed his long, furred coat. Two large marks marred his neck and there was no way he was going to be hiding them. He supposed he couldn't complain too much, though, because he noticed how many hickeys he'd left on Gajeel's neck and chest as he changed into his long black tunic and Laxus smirked. They'd been rough with each other over the weekend. His grin vanished when he realized he was never going to hear the end of it from Mira.

And Gramps…

"So… are we going to tell Gramps today?" Laxus leaned on the doorframe to Gajeel's room, watching him as he pulled his boots on, "It's a little obvious we slept together."

Gajeel looked over at him as he tied his laces, the look on his face telling Laxus just how uncomfortable he was with the thought, "Now's as good a time as any, I s'pose."

"We can try to avoid him for a couple weeks if you want but I'm sure news will get around," Laxus sighed, scratching at the back of his head, "I'd rather be the one to tell him before he finds out from Mira or Erza or Cana."

"I get that," Gajeel huffed, glancing at himself in his own mirror, "Think I should dress a little nicer, then?"

Laxus smirked, "And why in the hell would ya do that?"

"Maybe he won't get pissed at me if I don't look like some sorta thug,"

Laxus snickered, "He won't be pissed with you… if anything he'd be pissed with me."

"Eh? And why's that?" Gajeel quirked a studded brow at him as he stood and headed for the stairs.

"He wants to see great-grandkids someday,"

"Ah… yeah… that probably won't happen," Gajeel muttered, stuffing his hands into his pockets, a slight smile coming to his face, "But I don't think the world could handle another miniature Laxus running around anyway."

Laxus rolled his eyes, still in good humor, "I think a small Gajeel would be worse."

Gajeel put a hand to his chest as he walked past the blonde, feigning contempt as he tromped out the door, "What? I was an _angel_ growing up. Just ask my dad."

"Oh yeah, I'm sure a dragon-raised feral child would be just perfect," Laxus jabbed at him, "Maybe we can just find another one of those to raise."

Gajeel snorted, "I wasn't feral."

"Raised by a dragon with no human contact since you were a child? Pretty sure that's the definition of a feral child."

"Eh… I was older… and I knew about humans before Metalicana found me."

"Older?" Laxus prompted, finally dropping his teasing and listened seriously. Gajeel had rarely talked openly about his dad before. He felt sort of privileged to hear, "How old?"

Gajeel stopped walking at that and focused his gaze in the distance, "Well… I'm not sure… I'd been livin' on the streets for a while," he scratched the side of his head as he thought and mumbled a little bit as he tried to do the math, "I think he left when I was twelve? So nine… probably."

Laxus furrowed his brow, "How old are you, exactly?"

Gajeel grinned, "Twenty-five."

Laxus blinked, "No… you're not."

Gajeel gave him a quizzical look, "I may not know my birthday, but I know how many summers I've been alive. I'm twenty-five,"

Laxus huffed, "There's no way you're older than me."

Gajeel's eyes lit up at that, " _What_?"

"Here it goes…"

"How old are _you_ , Laxus," Gajeel grinned up at him, crossing his arms with a haughty look on his face.

Laxus sighed, "Twenty-three."

Gajeel's grin almost stretched completely across his face and he eyed Laxus slyly, obviously full of himself, "I'm… your senpai?"

"Fucking hell," Laxus growled, suddenly taken to glaring at the sidewalk.

Gajeel elbowed him playfully, "Say it."

"Say _what_?"

"Say I'm your senpai."

"Absolutely not."

"C'mon, I believe in you! Tell me I'm your senpai."

"Would you lower your fucking voice?" Laxus hissed as heat crept up his neck from the stares Gajeel was attracting.

"Not until you. _Call_. _Me_. _Senpai_." His voice got louder at the last three words and Laxus finally broke.

"Fine!" he gripped Gajeel's wrist and pulled him close, through his gritted teeth he forced out the words in a barely audible snarl, "Are you happy now? _Senpai_?"

Gajeel's face suddenly turned red, "You… you actually said it."

"What? Didn't like it, _senpai_?"

"No… stop… that's weird."

Now it was Laxus's turn to grin, albeit much more maliciously than Gajeel had, "But I thought you wanted me to call you senpai?"

Gajeel shoved him away, "Stop saying that! I take it back!"

Laxus couldn't help it. Seeing Gajeel's face red like that got his engine revving. He ruffled his tangled hair, smiling at the way Gajeel's shoulders stiffened as he glared up at him indignantly. "Cute…" he murmured, to which the raven somehow turned a deeper shade of red. He stepped up, leaning on his toes to be eye-level with Laxus and shoving him again, a little more roughly.

"I ain't cute," he huffed, though he lacked some vigor, and turned towards the guildhall, "Fucking fairy."

Laxus smiled easily as he walked after him, "How can I help it when you look like that?"

"Yeah, yeah," Laxus could still see the scarlet on the tips of his ears as he pushed open the doors to the hall. He followed after Gajeel quietly, trying not to mind the stares as they walked in. His eyes fell on Mira as she waved at them from the bar and quickly followed was the sound of snickering from a table near to her. Freed, Bickslow, and Evergreen sat hunched together, eyes glued to the pair as they walked in. Laxus gritted his teeth, already not prepared for the ambush waiting for them as they approached.

"Hey Laxus," Evergreen called, smiling slyly as they got closer, "How was your weekend?"

Bickslow's totems flittered around Gajeel, pushing him closer to the table as he attempted to walk past. Bickslow gripped onto his hand and pulled him into the seat next to him. Gajeel bristled, obviously uncomfortable.

"We have a bet going on, you gotta let us know who won," he hummed, cunning eyes glistening as he eyed Laxus's neck. Gajeel clenched his jaw and pushed his arm away, an annoyed grimace quickly overcoming his face.

"A bet?" Laxus cocked a brow and glanced up at Mira who was leaning over the bar, arms crossed with a sweet smile on her features, "Do I want to know?"

"Freed?" Laxus prompted him but his cheeks just turned a heated scarlet and he clutched at his sword.

"First, I would like to say that this was not my idea and I tried to discourage their outrageous behavior but they wouldn't listen…"

Mira rested her cheek in her palm, "We bet on who would be the top," she eyed Laxus, "I said you."

Laxus tried to keep a cool look but the heat that suddenly flooded his body told him he was blushing furiously and there was no way he'd be hiding it. Gajeel also turned a deep shade of red and he clicked his teeth, "Yer all fuckin' nosey bastards…"

"I…" hi coughed and scratched at the side of his neck, immediately noticing the impish stares from his friends as the rest of them noticed Gajeel's marks, "I got somethin' to take care of real quick."

Gajeel's eyes widened as he stepped away, "Oi! Don't you fuckin' dare-!"

Laxus shot him a toothy smile as he sidestepped away from them and strode quickly for the stairs, heading for Gramps' office. He almost felt bad for leaving Gajeel with his rowdy bunch but at the same time it had been a good reason to make him stay downstairs while he broke the news to Gramps. It wasn't that didn't think it would be good to have Gajeel there. His worry was that the conversation wouldn't go well and inflict some sort of blow to his pride… and if it went too bad, Laxus wasn't sure how he'd handle it himself.

Only the sounds of his heavy footsteps greeted him as he lumbered down the short hall that led to his door. Damn, he was nervous, probably more nervous than he really needed to be. Gramp's door was shut and for a minute he just stood in front of it and stared, taking a deep breath to settle the rolling edginess in his stomach that was threatening to eat him. He knocked on the door and waited, then once more when there was no response.

"Come in," a weary sigh came through the wood and he slowly opened the door. The smallish man was sitting in a large chair behind a desk covered in paperwork. Laxus immediately recognized the familiar invoices outlining property damage and medical fees. He had a large feathered quill in his hand as he jotted down numbers. This was the more demanding side of being Guild Master, a side most of the members downstairs rarely saw or recognized except for Mira who balanced their books. Laxus could remember weekends where Gramps would bring these stacks of papers home and comb through numbers, muttering about Gildarts, and then Mira, Erza, and finally Natsu. Things were simpler between them back then; back before his dad was banished from the guild, before his resentment towards his grandfather had become quite so excessive, before he'd attacked Fairy Tail. Things seemed harder between them now and as he got older and simmered down from his high pride, he learned more and more that he really had no one to blame but himself.

"Hey old man," Laxus stopped quite some ways away from him and crossed his arms, his nerves still getting the better of him, "Looks like you're havin' some fun."

Makarov rubbed his forehead, obviously drained already, and glanced up from the statement he was charting. His mustache twitched as he smiled wearily, "Well then… what can I help _you_ with? You don't usually visit me in my study. It must be something important… not another bill, I hope?"

"Nah, nothing like that…" he looked to the side and scratched at his neck nervously, "It's… personal."

He blinked for a minute and set down his quill, giving his grandson his full attention, "Need to shut the door?"

Laxus set his jaw and complied. When he turned back to his grandfather the small man was perched on the edge of his desk, legs crossed while he lit his pipe and puffed a few rings of smoke as the tobacco started to smolder.

"Is everything alright?" his dark eyes pierced into Laxus's chest and he was suddenly even more nervous than he had been in the hall. This was honestly something he thought he'd never talk to his Gamps about. He gritted his teeth. There wasn't really any turning back now unless he could think of an elaborate lie on the spot and his insides weren't allowing his mind the ability to think clearly enough for that at the moment.

"Yeah, it's nothing like that. I just thought I should say something before Mira or someone did," Laxus muttered and noticed the way he quirked a snowy brow and glanced at his neck.

"New girlfriend?" he smirked.

"That's sort of it…" he let out a tense sigh.

"Something tells me you're not here to tell me you're finally going to propose to Mirajane," he chuckled, twisting the side of his mustache between his finger and thumb.

"Not even close, Pops," his heart beat a little harder.

Makarov's smile finally vanished then and his brows furrowed, "What's wrong, Laxus? It's not like you to be so unsure of yourself."

"I feel like I've heard that before," his lip tugged up in a wry grin, "I just… ah fuck… I guess I just wanted to know how you'd feel if you found out I was dating a man."

Laxus could almost see his grandfather's brain short circuit. As Laxus's words sank in his eyes slowly widened and he broke eye contact with him, suddenly extremely interested in his pipe.

"Well… that's certainly better than another bill," he muttered, "I don't understand… you dated Mira for so long…"

Laxus swallowed, suddenly realizing his throat was dry, "You can like guys _and_ girls, Gramps. It's not unheard of."

He laughed nervously, "Of course, of course… when did you find out?"

"I've sort of known for a while… ever since I started being interested in _that_ kind of thing, anyway," he shrugged, itching at his neck again.

"And I'm guessing the person who gave you that unsightly thing was your boyfriend, then?" he arched a brow yet again, not hiding his disdain, "Honestly, Laxus… you know people around town watch you…."

"I know, Gramps, I know," despite himself, Laxus laughed, finally breaking through his own nervous tension, "It's a little old-fashioned of you to be so worried about hickeys, though, old man."

"Be that as it may, the younger ones look up to you. You shouldn't be walking around looking like that," he scolded Laxus with arms crossed, but the sentiment never really made it to his eyes. They were silent for a minute after that, Laxus not believing how well the conversation was going and Makarov not sure exactly what to say next. The two just avoided each other's eyes, pretending to be in their own thoughts. Finally, Makarov broke the silence, "So… when do you plan on bringing this guy around? Don't think the guild will scare him off?"

Laxus grinned, "Definitely not."

"Don't tell me it's someone here?" his eyes widened even more and Laxus just smiled, "Well… there goes my hope you'd find someone to settle you down."

"You knew that wasn't gonna happen anyway,"

"An old man can dream, Laxus!" he huffed, blowing a few more rings of smoke, "Who is it?"

"Gajeel."

"Gajeel? _Gajeel Redfox_?" he seemed incredulous and he chewed on the end of his pipe, "I didn't think he… but I suppose I also didn't realize you…"

"You don't have to know everything about everyone, Gramps, then what would we have Mirajane here for?"

Makarov sighed and fell silent once again, seeming thoughtful and very serious, "He's a rough one, Laxus, and he's been through a lot."

"Trust me, Gramps, I know," he put his hands into his pockets at he watched his grandfather wrestle with his own concern.

"But he makes you happy, right?" he met Laxus's eyes finally, a somber look on his face.

"Yeah… yeah, he does… and I like to think I make him happy, too."

After a moment a wide, easy smile spread across Makarov's face and Laxus thought his heart might hammer out of his chest at the sight, "Well, you're a man, Laxus, and you have been for a while. You don't need me doting over you anymore. I can't say I understand everything, but I can understand finding someone that makes you happy. If this is the path you choose then you have my support."

Shit… why did a lump suddenly form in his throat?

"Thanks, Gramps… I really appreciate that…"

He hopped off the desk and walked up to him, a gentle look on his features, "Of course, my son… I know we've had our problems, some worse than others, but I hope you know and understand that I love you, Laxus. I don't think of you as just my grandson. I consider you my own son… and all I really want is that you find happiness and peace."

Laxus knelt down and let him wrap his arms around his chest, the smell of tobacco stinging his nose, "Yeah, Gramps… I know."

"There's nothing you can do that will change that… haven't I proven that already?" he muttered, pulling back with a wide smile.

"Of course…"

They broke their hug, each of them pretending not to be as worked up over the whole thing as they really were. Laxus turned and put his hand on the door before Makarov's voice drove him to a halt once more.

"Just promise me one thing, Laxus?"

"Eh? What is it?"

"If you two get into a fight, you won't do it here… I have enough repair bills to deal with. That kind of carnage would probably be the end of me," he laughed nervously and Laxus smiled at him.

"No promises there," Laxus smiled cheekily before slipping out the door and shutting it tightly behind him. He leaned against it for a few beats and waited for his heart and nerves to finally settle. He seemed lighter and his mind was in a buzz over how easy the conversation had been. Gramps had taken that well… much better than he'd thought. It was a relief aside from being just one less thing to worry about.

Laxus didn't realize his was still smiling to himself until he was halfway down the hall.

When Laxus came back down the stairs he was shocked to see that Gajeel was gone. He eyed Mira for a minute who just waved at him as if she had no idea what had happened. He turned his attention to Freed who was hissing something to Bickslow, the latter, of course, not particularly caring about whatever his emerald-haired friend had to say. Evergreen crossed her arms and leaned back, straightening her glasses.

"I don't understand what he was so upset about. We were just curious…" she pouted, flipping her hair to the side.

"Guy needs to lighten up," Bickslow eyed the door and his babies issued little chirps in agreement.

"Please don't tell me you guys actually managed to scare him away," Laxus growled and all eyes turned to him, startled.

"L-Laxus!" Freed stood suddenly, "I'll take full responsibility for what our comrades did-"

"Freed," Mira's sing-song voice piped from where she was cleaning glasses, "You were asking questions too."

"But I… I meant no harm!" he objected, thumbing the hilt of his blade, "And I certainly didn't know he'd get so angry he'd leave!"

Laxus ran his fingers through his hair, exasperated, "Did he go home?"

"Yes!" Freed, Bickslow, and Evergreen all called in unison.

"What am I going to do with you guys?" he sighed, "I had hoped you all would get along."

The three of them glanced at each other nervously and even Bickslow scratched the back of his head.

"Why don't you all go on a mission together?" Mirajane called, pulling her binder out from under the bar.

To Laxus's surprise, Bickslow was the first to respond, "That might not be a bad idea."

"I think he just doesn't like us," Evergreen bit back, refusing to budge, "And bringing him with us will just end badly."

"I'm happy to give it a shot for Laxus's sake!" Freed rushed over to Mira, helping to search through recent postings.

"Of course you are," Bickslow smirked, also rising to meet him at the bar. Evergreen just huffed, not moving, but also refusing to meet Laxus's gaze.

"Are you worried he's going to break up the Raijinshu?" Laxus raised an eyebrow at her and she started, "Or are you just being petty?"

"I'm not being petty," she flipped her hair at him and turned to look away, "But if he doesn't like us he's just going to make the trip unbearable."

"He doesn't like his privacy being invaded. You should understand that more than anyone," he muttered, walking past her. She refused to make a comment at that but he could tell her posture had softened just slightly, "Go help the guys pick out a mission. It's been a while since we all went. If Gajeel acts like he won't want to go, I'm not going to make him come with us."

She tapped her foot lightly and her voice had less of an edge, "Well fine. At least I can make sure it's short."

Laxus shrugged, "Do what you think is best."

"Well of course. I'm the only one of us with sound judgement, after all."

He rolled his eyes and left, bracing himself against the bite of the autumn air as the sun started to dip closer to the horizon. He wasn't sure what he'd expected. He supposed if the roles were reversed, he'd done the same thing. He shoved his hands into his pockets. Gajeel was going to be pissed when he got home, no doubt. He was just starting to think that maybe he should stop and buy some beer as an apology when he turned down his block and noticed something strange by their house.

He stopped in his tracks for a minute, a shock of cold racing through his veins. Sitting on the street was a large cart with walls bearing the symbol of the Magic Council and surrounding it were four Rune Knights with staffs at the ready, bearing the insignia of the Custody Enforcement Division. Laxus clenched his fists, remember the night that Gajeel had been sitting at the cliff, ready to jump.

 _"He wants Kurogane locked up because I'm a menace to everyone around me…"_

He hurried down the street, trying to contain the anger suddenly bubbling up in his chest.

"Hey! Stop!" one of the four posted reached out as he approached, pointing his staff at him, "There's an investigation under way."

"This is my house," he growled, walking past him without so much as a glance in his direction, "And you're not getting in my way."

"W-wait! Sir!"

He stormed up the steps and slammed open the door. His anger dissipated slightly.

Gajeel was sitting in a recliner, leaned back with a cigarette in his hand and his ankle crossed over his knee. His eyes darted over at Laxus immediately and he could see the hard look hiding in his ruby irises. Laxus was instantly on the defensive, turning to the three other men garbed in white and blue. Two of them were standing on either side of the third with staffs in hand, obviously just soldiers. The one sitting on their couch, however, wasn't wearing the same standard robes as the others. He must have been an officer, because he wore long white pants and held a book and pen in his hands. He straightened his glasses and glared over at Laxus as if the intrusion was unwarranted and Laxus had just interrupted something important.

"I thought I told the guards not to let anyone else inside," he muttered, flipping his page. One of the other soldiers stepped forward and Laxus released a bit of his magic, allowing his electricity to snap in his direction. A warning.

"This is my house," he growled, clenching his fists, "You have no right to keep me out."

The councilman's eyes widened slightly and he glanced over at Gajeel, "I thought you said this was your house?"

"I never said how many people lived here," he said tersely, eyeing Laxus, "Calm down, man, they're just here to ask questions."

 _Man?_

"Three bachelors living under the same roof? I'm sure you get into a lot of fights," the Councilman jabbed and Laxus could see the way Gajeel clenched his jaw.

"You're not here to ask me about my living situation," he took another drag from his cigarette but didn't hold it in like he usually did. He was extremely nervous, something the others in the room probably didn't recognize but Laxus saw immediately.

"What's going on?" Laxus demanded, "And who in the hell are you?"

"My name is Davian Bishop, Second Lieutenant in the Custody Enforcement Third Division, and as Mr. Redfox just explained, we're here to ask questions regarding the Ulrich case," he leaned back slightly, "And unless you're trying to impede my investigation, I'd suggest you leave."

Laxus clenched his teeth. He could recognize a threat when he heard one, even as veiled as this was. He crossed his arms and took on a strong stance, daring the two soldiers to try and move him. "I have a hard time seeing how this is just an interrogation since you already have a transport outside."

"Laxus," Gajeel growled, "Stop."

Davian grinned, a sly gesture that made Laxus think of a snake, "See? He's cooperating. You should too, Mr.?"

"Dreyar," Laxus snapped, "Laxus Dreyar."

His grinned vanished then and Laxus surged forward, deciding to take post by Gajeel's side. He noticed the two guards exchanging looks, more than likely realizing exactly who he was and what it meant if he was there.

"You always seem to make friends with the right people, Mr. Redfox," Davian muttered, jotting something down.

"Just lucky I s'pose," he replied coolly, "Must be my magnetic personality."

"Must be," he smiled again, folding his hands and looking directly at Gajeel, "So… how long were you with Ms. Ulrich?"

"Ms. Ulrich?" Laxus glanced down at Gajeel.

"Bianca Ulrich," he replied simply and Laxus felt his stomach turn. _So that was what this was all about_ , "And I wasn't with her. She was holding me captive."

"Answer the question, please,"

"Nine days."

"And how was it that you got free?"

Gajeel glanced over at Laxus, "Some of my guildmates realized I'd been missing for too long. They sent one into my cell and I had him short out the electric lock."

"And who was the person that was put into your cell?"

Gajeel hesitated and Laxus felt his chest tighten.

"It was me," Laxus snarled, meeting a surprised look from Davian.

"It was… you?" he flipped through a few sheets, "I suppose it was…" he turned his eyes back to Gajeel, "And you were with her, why?"

"She _kidnapped_ me because she wanted to use my Dragon Slayer Magic to make a potion," he breathed more acrid smoke into the air and Laxus noticed the vein on the side of his neck jumping as he clenched and unclenched his jaw.

"Right, right… and you with her how long?"

"Nine days."

"And she was trying to make a potion?"

"Yes."

"What for?"

"She was running a human trafficking operation. Whatever it was, it was supposed to mess with the kids."

"The kids?"

"She kidnapped kids."

"When you say kids, how old do you mean?"

Laxus swallowed, furious. Why was he asking all this? Shouldn't all of this have been taken down in Gajeel's original statement? And he hadn't even remembered that Laxus was there?

"The youngest while I was there was thirteen," Laxus noticed the way Gajeel was staring at Davian, as if he were throwing the words like darts, trying to make him flinch. Davian didn't seem fazed, "He was sold before I'd been there a couple of days. The guys investigating into the human trafficking ring still haven't found him. The oldest was seventeen."

"And how many kids were there?"

"At one point there were twelve. When I got free there were seven."

"Were all of them sold?"

"I don't know."

"You mean you didn't see them all sold?"

"I mean they had pigs in and out of that place and sometimes the kids would disappear and other times they came back. Sometimes the kids came back sick and then their friends would talk about them like they were dead."

"How do you know? Were you in the same cell with them?"

"I could hear through the walls," Gajeel's voice dropped as he spoke those words and he glared daggers into Davian, "I have amazing hearing. A perk to bein' a Slayer."

Davian met his eyes then but his face betrayed nothing, "Were you ever in the same cell with one of them?"

"Yes."

Laxus's stopped breathing. _What?!_

"And when was this?"

"About seven days in."

"Did you lay your hands on him?"

"What makes you think it was a him?"

Suddenly the room was silent. Davian's lip quirked up slightly, "An assumption. Was it a boy?"

"They were all boys," Gajeel bit back, "If you'd done your homework, you would have known that."

"I can assure you, Mr. Redfox, I do _all_ of my homework," Davian smiled wider and Laxus's heart started jumping to a faster pace. He closed his notepad and leaned it against his knees, crossing his arms and relaxing as if he were in a room with friends instead of the middle of an interrogation, "January fourth of year 780, you were seen outside a warehouse in the middle of the Shade district in the city of Zinnia. The next day Razor "The Wind" Wess was found dead and surveillance tapes had been pulled. Where were you that night?"

"I was with Juvia Lockser in the Amethyst district. We'd taken a mission to help rebuild a church that had been burned down. They paid for us to stay in the local Motel run by a couple from the church for our efforts. The receipts were given to Custody Enforcement and Juvia was also interviewed. Both of us were cleared as suspects from that case."

"And why was that?" Davian smirked.

"Because there would be no way for us to make it to the Shade district and back again without the couple seeing or hearing us leave. I think time was also an issue."

"But for a mage known for his stealth as you are, it probably wouldn't be hard for you to sneak out of the inn and back again without being seen?"

"I'm pretty sure the decision made by your superiors was based off of fact, not speculation," Gajeel leaned forward a little before he spoke, his voice taking a razor-like edge. Laxus shivered. What was that? Had he heard Gajeel speak like that before?

"What happened to the boy that was put into your cell?"

"I don't know."

"Let me rephrase; what happened to him while he was in the cell with you?"

"Are you asking me if I assaulted him?" Gajeel's words were forced and Laxus could hear the rage he was barely keeping restrained, "No, I didn't. They left him in there with me for three hours. I don't know what they were trying to accomplish but I didn't touch him."

"February of year 780, a string of assassinations took place killing three brothers that led drug rings just inside of Acacia. Each one was killed in different ways, but the footage was pulled of those nights from the cameras and a black feather was found at one of the scenes. Where were you each of those nights?"

"Phantom Lord. I didn't take any missions in Acacia that February. Several witnesses from the guild testified on my behalf, including Master Jose. I think there was a guy imprisoned for those crimes. Someone from the Southern Wolves."

"You have a flawless memory, Mr. Redfox," Davian wasn't smiling anymore, instead he was staring into Gajeel intensely. Laxus could feel the tension building. It was palpable and filled the room like bile rolling dangerously in his stomach, "Do you remember a gentleman by the name of Francis Grey? You may have known him better as- "

"Eclipse," Gajeel spat out the name as if it were rancid, "Yes, I remember him."

"He had a good memory too, you know," Davian tipped his head back as he spoke so he had to look down his nose at Gajeel. The action infuriated Laxus and he was biting at the bit to say something, _anything_ , to shut this farce of an interrogation down. What was this even about? He didn't even seem interested in what had happened with Bianca, "Did you know he's in the Ember Island Maximum Security Prison now? Have you ever been there, Mr. Redfox?"

"Can't say I have…" the words rumbled in Gajeel's chest as he spoke. He took a final hit from his cigarette and flicked the ashes onto the ground before putting it out against the rubber of his boot. He finally tore his gaze from Davian and even though he seemed calm Laxus could feel the iron energy in the air. It made the tip of his tongue taste like blood and his own lightning was echoing inside his stomach like thunder. It felt like a fight about to break loose.

"You've lived on the edge of loopholes for years, haven't you? Because no one could prove anything and you kept going free. That's not very fair to your friends who are locked up, is it?" Davian prodded, taking his glasses from his face and glancing up over at Laxus for the second time during their conversation. Laxus was suddenly aware that he had bright desert-orange eyes that were slitted like a lizard's. Laxus clenched his jaw. _He knew those eyes._

"I didn't have any friends in Phantom Lord," Gajeel replied coldly, crossing his arms as he spoke.

"You didn't have _any_ friends?" Laxus felt like the ground beneath them was glass and Davian was slowly chipping away at the floor, breaking little fractures beneath them, trying to make them fall through. That devilish grin was slowly crawling back across his face and Laxus felt dread start to broil along with his lightning deep in his gut, "What about Hajime Kaiyu?"

"What about Hajime?" Gajeel's voice was a blade slicing through the room, clattering to the glass floor and filling it with fissures.

"Sources say you've been in touch… a known informant from Phantom Lord,"

"Hajime was forced into retirement over six years ago," Gajeel bit through every word as if they were pieces of steel and it made Laxus want to shiver.

"By you?"

"By Jose Porla… or Aria… or whoever the fuck ye want ta blame," he raged, gripping the armrests so tightly Laxus could hear the leather groan, "He left tha guild an' started a clean life. He has a wife an' a kid an' he's been clean since the day he left."

"That didn't stop him from giving information to different members of the guild… after all, managing a bar sure does keep one in the company of interesting characters…" he mused, enjoying the ire he'd caused, "I wonder what I could dig up on him if I went through some old cold cases?"

"What is it that you want?" forcing his voice through his throat felt like fire. Laxus's neck was so tight he thought he might choke, "And don't tell me it's about the Ulrich case, since that's definitely a lie."

Davian drew in a deep, easy breath and chuckled as they'd just been talking about the weather or petty gossip around the guild, "Mr. Dreyar, I assure you I'm just doing my job. Everyone on the other side of the interrogation table always paints me out to be the villain but in reality, I'm here to _stop_ the bad guys, Mr. Dreyar. And you must understand, when dealing with someone with such a long history of delinquency there are questions you have to ask… to prove validity."

"That's interesting," Laxus countered in turn, trying to maintain a level head under the circumstances, "Because I was also there and I was only interviewed once."

His smile faltered slightly, "Interesting indeed… but you're also not a known criminal."

"I thought Gajeel had never been convicted of a crime?"

"…He hasn't…"

"Then in the eyes of the law, you can't treat him as a criminal, can you?" Laxus growled and Davian's smile fell away; instead there settled a look of near annoyance, as if he'd been caught, "I'll ask again, Davian Bishop: What is it that you want? If you can't tell me, I think you'll have to wait to ask any more questions until you have a warrant."

Davian stared at him for a moment, those reptilian eyes expanding and contracting as he watched Laxus, before he finally turned eyes back to Gajeel with words agitated and terse, "I have a source telling me you've been in contact with Mr. Kaiyu. Given the sensitivity of this case and the _allegations_ that are being brought up against you, I'm here to find out why."

"What allegations?" Laxus growled but Gajeel spoke over him.

"I took a short vacation to Edelweiss over the weekend. I ran into him on the street and he asked me to come in and catch up. I ate breakfast, I helped him unload his supply cart, and I left."

"That's all?"

"Yessir."

"And the night before?" Davian spat at him, his agitation making him lose his composure.

"He was with me," Laxus snarled, derailing everyone in the room. He was sick of this charade. It pissed him off that Gajeel hadn't mentioned he'd been there. He had an idea that it was to protect him, but they'd done nothing wrong. They had nothing to hide and he certainly wasn't going to allow Gajeel to fight his battles on his own any longer.

"He was… he was with you?" Davian glanced Laxus's way and he watched Gajeel clench his jaw tightly, "And the night after?"

"He was with me then too," Laxus put his hands on his hips and straightened his spine, tired of feeling like a victim and ready to take charge, "All night."

"And there was no time either night he could have left? Not even when you were asleep?" Davian prodded, smirking slightly, obviously feeling that he'd found a nick in his armor.

"Doubt it. We were wrapped around each other all night."

"And what the hell is that supposed to mean?" Davian hissed through gritted teeth, finally angry.

Laxus leaned forward as he spoke, even as Gajeel whispered his name in harsh warning, "Do I need to spell it out for you, Mr. Bishop?"

His eyes widened and he coughed, suddenly cooler than he was before, "Be that as it may, that doesn't rule out-"

"We're done here. Get out." Laxus growled, taking a step forward.

" _I'll_ be the one to say when my interrogation is done!" Davian stood, instantly infuriated once again. Laxus slipped, his magical energy finally discharging after being pent up for so long. There was a bright flash that filled the entire room and a crack of thunder so strong it shook the house. There was a clatter as pots and pans fell off of the shelf in the kitchen and a couple portraits that had been hung on the wall shattered on the ground. Davian fell back into his seat and recoiled, eyes wide on Laxus as he clasped his binder.

Laxus swallowed but never moved his gaze from the slimy man, "This _interrogation_ has gone from a mild nuisance to straight out harassment. You have no warrant. You have no basis for your accusations. You have no reason to be here. I'm only saying this one more time: Get out of my house."

Davian didn't move, just sat and glared up at the blonde.

"Or do I need to get my grandfather involved?"

Davian ground his teeth and stood, his eyes filled with fire as he gathered his cloak around him, "We'll be in touch."

"I don't doubt it," Laxus spat, never moving his gaze from the three as they left. Neither Laxus nor Gajeel spoke or moved as they listened to the carriage get loaded up and wheel away.

"You didn't need to do that."

Laxus didn't answer. His mind was spinning, an angry itch at the back of his mind slowly eating at him. Hajime… when they'd spoken to Hajime…

"Gajeel…" Laxus breathed, not turning to look back at him.

"Yeah?"

"When we met Hajime… he said that he remembered you talking about being with your partner up at the hotel."

Gajeel didn't respond.

"But… you didn't mention anything about us being there when he saw us on the street… did you?"

Finally, he turned to glance over at Gajeel. The raven met his eyes but he was guarded. His lips were drawn in a tight line. He'd been caught.

"Why did we go to Edelweiss, Gajeel?"

"You know… to get away for a while…" there was no conviction in his voice as he spoke and Laxus suddenly felt sick.

"Is that the only reason?" he prompted tensely, clenching his fists. Gajeel fell silent again and this time tore his eyes from Laxus's to stare down at his hands. Laxus let out a breath, trying to keep calm, "What were the allegations he was talking about?"

"Laxus… I don't want to get you involved in this…"

"What are the allegations, Gajeel?" he pressed, his voice getting tighter.

"Murder."

"Of Bianca?"

"And all the guys working for her,"

Laxus swallowed hard, "Have you gotten a lawyer?"

He snorted, "A lawyer isn't going to help me."

"They would if you'd get your head outta your ass long enough to ask for help," Laxus growled, stepping towards him. He didn't know what he was going to do. He felt stressed, angry, and hurt. Why didn't he tell him anything about this?

"It doesn't matter if I do or don't." Gajeel retorted back, eyes flashing.

"And why the hell not?"

"Because someone is after me, Laxus," he hissed, taking Laxus off guard, "Someone is after me and I don't know who it is."

"Listen to you, Gajeel. The only person after you is some dumbass on the Enforcement Division who can't let go of the past."

He stood, then, so quickly he almost knocked the recliner over. He never moved his voice from a low murmur and it startled Laxus. He was absolutely serious, " _Someone_ missed that bitch after she died, Laxus, and they want me to pay for her murder. I don't know who it is; a client, a relative, someone on the Magic Council, _I don't know_. But _someone_ wants me behind bars or worse."

"And what makes you so sure?" Laxus back-pedaled, furrowing his brow as he spoke, trying to understand. That type of thing didn't really happen, did it? Not that far up the chain?

"Because _they've lost everything_ , Laxus," he dropped the words like lead and Laxus suddenly lost all of his fire from before, "It was all misplaced or mislabeled or _lost_ , Laxus. And when they went back to gather evidence? Everything was clean. All they have left are the kids' statements and do you know, heh, _do you know what they FUCKING said_?"

He shook his head slowly, finding it hard to watch his partner breaking down in his own frustration and helplessness.

"They can't rely on the words of seven _delinquent_ kids. They would say anything to keep out of trouble. They threw them out, Laxus, they won't even consider them… _the victims_."

Laxus felt like his mind had just stopped working, "We need to talk to Gramps."

"What? No! Absolutely not!"

"He's the guildmaster and a Wizard Saint, Gajeel. He can say something, get to someone who can actually fix this…"

"No. Makarov has done enough to keep me out of trouble. I'm not dragging his name through the mud any more. Laxus, _don't_ tell Makarov about this… I'll fix it myself."

"Fix it yourself?" Laxus sneered, "And how will you do that from prison?"

"I ain't goin' ta prison yet," he snapped, "Why do ya think I reached out ta Hajime? He has connections, he can talk ta people…"

"Why don't you let me help you? Aren't we a couple? Isn't that what I'm supposed to do? Help you?"

"I. Don't. Want. Yer. Help."

"And why the hell not? Do you think I'm going to abandon you, Gajeel? Do you honestly think I'd do something like that?!"

Gajeel lashed out and Laxus flinched, certain he was going to hit him. Instead, he gripped onto Laxus's arms and pulled him close. For a moment they just stayed like that, Laxus not knowing what to do and Gajeel clutching him so tightly he was shaking. He could feel his warm breath ghost against his ear and taste his spice and the tang of iron.

"I don't know who these people are, Laxus, or what they're capable of and it scares the hell outta me…"

"Gajeel…"

"I don't know how far they're willing to go to get to me. I didn't want them to know we were a couple because I don't fucking know what I'd do if you got dragged inta this…"

Laxus hugged him back, let his chin rest on his shoulder, "I'm not your little girlfriend that ya gotta keep safe, Gajeel. I'm a fucking S-Class Wizard."

"I used to think I was tough shit too until they stripped me down to nothing and left me helpless," he breathed into his ear and with each word his voice shook. Laxus finally sobered, his rage and fear dissipating, "If it happened to me again I know somehow I'd live through it. But fucking hell if they did it to you… because of some stupid fucking mistake I made…"

"It's not gonna happen, Gajeel," he muttered, although the words felt like mud in his mouth. Gajeel drew back then and looked Laxus in his eyes, red eyes swimming with just a touch of despair, and Laxus felt like his soul was being ripped apart.

"Tell me if you were in my shoes you wouldn't feel the same."

Laxus didn't even try. They were too similar that way. If something like this were happening to Laxus he knew he'd want to keep everyone he cared for out of harm's way even if that meant shouldering the burden on his own.

"How close are you to finding out who they are?" Laxus mumbled, still finding it hard to respond to him.

"I don't know."

"As soon as you do, tell me. _Promise_ me, if this is something you can't handle, you'll tell me… and we'll get Gramps involved."

"I can't promise that."

Laxus gritted his teeth, his heart racing, "Then fucking lie and tell me you will."

"I… I promise…"

"And please promise that whatever it is, it's not illegal."

To that Gajeel just broke into a smirk, although it didn't quite meet his eyes, "There ain't nothin' illegal about snooping around."

"Keep it that way."

"Of course," was all he had time to whisper before Laxus was kissing him, pulling him as close as possible and consuming his breath. He felt like he couldn't be close enough to Gajeel in that moment. He needed to be closer, tethered together, so that he couldn't just suddenly drift away. He was too stressed out and it was a shock to feel that way. But he knew that the more he kissed Gajeel, the more it melted away and he could pretend the very large, angry problem in front of them was just a little farther away than it really was.

Gajeel pulled away from him first, breathless and binding his fists into the fabric of Laxus's shirt, "Damn… does fucked up shit get yer engine running er somethin'?"

"Sorry… This whole thing stressed me out and I need to let out some energy…" he breathed, not moving his gaze from Gajeel's ruby eyes, "I can go… do something else…"

"Mmnh…" Gajeel leaned up and hummed against his lips, stealing another kiss, "T's fine… I can burn some energy too…"

"Good… because I really need to be a part of you right now…" Laxus purred, trying to keep himself still as Gajeel widened his eyes in surprise at his words, "I know, it's weird."

"Yer really possessive, ain't ya Sparky?" he muttered, retreating towards the stairs.

"Does it bother you?"

"Nah… I'm pretty possessive too."

They fell back together as soon as they made it to Laxus's room. Laxus kicked the door shut, his hands too busy tugging the hem of Gajeel's shirt up and over his shoulders. He didn't even take care to hang up his favorite jacket but instead tossed it to the floor as if it were nothing to him. Gajeel was working on his shirt, his hands slipping far too masterfully down the soft fabric and undoing each button with ease until he was at Laxus's pants, making short work of his barrier there.

"I wonder if I can pick you up," he muttered, gaining a questioning look from the raven. Without asking for permission, he gripped Gajeel's thighs and lifted him, turning and pushing him against the wall for some more support.

"What the _hell_ , Laxus!"

Laxus just grinned, "This would be easier if you weren't so heavy."

"If you drop me I swear to Earthland…!"

"I'm not gonna drop you," he smirked and slid his lover down so their hips were aligned, grinding against him as he leaned up to run his tongue up his neck, "B'sides… you're finally taller than me."

"Y'know… I don't really care."

"Fine…" he slid him down to the floor easily. Gajeel let out an easy sigh once his feet were on the ground and he slid his hand into Laxus's and pulled him towards the bed. They took care of their last few bits of clothing before Laxus pushed Gajeel towards the bed, running his hands from his shoulders down the length of his back and listening to the way the raven's breathing caught in his throat as he made his way down. He wasted no time in getting him ready and easing his way against the Iron Mage's opening to sheath himself deeply inside.

Gajeel sighed as Laxus gripped his thighs to position his hips the way he wanted. He worked his partner's shaft as he waited for him to relax and placed hot kisses down his shoulder blade. He teased at his head as he glided back onto his heels and thrusted. Gajeel rocked forward onto his forearms and buried his face into the sheets. Laxus was just starting to get lost when he felt a shiver go down Gajeel's spine.

"Is something wrong?" he managed huskily and slowed his thrusts. Gajeel hesitated a moment before he responded.

"I… I don't want to do it this way…" he forced out, pushing himself back up slightly, "I want to see you… and hold your hand."

"Fuck… yeah… of course…" he quickly obliged, sort of kicking himself for not doing that in the first place. They were both stressed out and he was particularly nervous… he really should have known…

He was over Gajeel in a heartbeat. He was already ready for him so he plunged back into his heat, intertwining their fingers together and kissing him deeply. He tried to be everything Gajeel could see, feel, hear, and taste. He moaned his name softly into his ear and nibbled at his neck. He forged as deeply into him as possible, all the while never releasing the grip he had on his hand. It was a quick romp, but it was just as passionate as if they'd decided to make love. When Laxus came he was running his tongue against Gajeel's teeth, stealing the breath from his mouth before he could utter a moan in response.

They ended up sleeping in the same bed and Laxus kept thinking there was something he was supposed to tell him but he was too tired and too content to spend any more time worrying about what it could possibly be.


	47. Chapter 47

Chapter 47:

Laxus was stirred from his sleep the next morning by the gentle feel of warm hands slipping across his torso. He yawned and stretched, feeling his bones creak from being in a stiff position all night, and opened his eyes to ebony tangles laying against his chest. Gajeel was leaning on crossed arms, eyes half open and just looking down at him. Laxus glided his hands down to his waist.

"Good morning," he muttered, running his tongue against his teeth as he thought about how bad his breath probably smelled.

Gajeel smirked, "Yer makin' a lazy man outta me."

"Are you sure you weren't just lazy before?" Laxus teased as he quirked an eyebrow at him.

"Lily and I used to get up at dawn every day and train," he hummed, turning his head to glance out the window absentmindedly, "I haven't taken a break for this long… probably ever."

"What could Lily have done to keep you on such a strict regimen, I wonder?"

Gajeel snorted, "I did that long before I met Lily."

"So driven…" Laxus smiled, "Even at Phantom Lord?"

"Especially at Phantom Lord."

"Who would have thought a delinquent would be so regimented."

"Jose ran a tight ship," Gajeel's lip curled upwards with just a touch of malice, "And I was a mercenary… not delinquent."

"I dunno… you seem like a delinquent to me."

Gajeel's smile faded slightly, "I'm a trained killer… not some kid pickpocketing tourists on the street."

"What?" Laxus scoffed playfully, nudging at his hip with his knee, "You're not even scary."

Gajeel clicked his teeth, "Tch, I'm not?"

"Not a bit, _Delinquent_."

In a quick, fluid motion, Gajeel slipped beneath Laxus's arms, gripped his wrists and pinned them over his head. His smile was milder than Laxus would have thought it should have been, "What about now?"

"Nope."

Gajeel moved smoothly and with grace, like a cat, a master of his body and anything he controlled. His hands brushed down his chest in that tender way Laxus loved, slowly digging more and more pressure into his skin as he worked his way down until angry red streaks slithered from his abs to stop at his hips. Gods alive, he loved the way Gajeel moved when he was trying to look powerful. One calloused hand slipped down to hook onto the crook of Laxus's knee while the other pinned down his hip. His ruby eyes flashed up at him as he dipped down to kiss the soft flesh of his thigh.

"…ok… maybe a little now."

"I don't think I like that nickname," Gajeel mumbled, spiking Laxus's blood as he dug his canine into his pale skin.

"Mmh… you're not doing a good job of convincing me…" Laxus sighed as Gajeel planted another fiery kiss and slithered his tongue out towards his more intimate areas, all the while holding his hips still so he couldn't break free if he wanted to… not that he really wanted to. His stomach bunched and the effects of Gajeel's touches and nips were apparent. He arched his back at the sudden shift in weight when Gajeel slipped his knee over his shoulder and sat back on his heels, leaving Laxus to feel cold and bare under his bloody gaze.

"You're pretty flexible," he observed, his voice barely above a coarse hum.

Laxus leered back up at him, "Mmm… I think your bar is just set low because you suck so bad."

Gajeel raised his studded brows smugly, "You're not in a good position ta be sayin' shit like that…"

He rocked forward on his heels and let the hand that had been holding his hips down slip tantalizingly close his hard-on. He tried to catch a sigh that escaped him as Gajeel straightened out his leg and kissed the side of his knee, then a couple inches above, then farther, all the while rocking slowly forward so he'd have to arch his back and stretch even more to keep from being uncomfortable. His hand danced around his desire, coaxing a frustrated noise from the back of Laxus's throat.

"Fucking…" he lost what he was going to say and Gajeel grinned wickedly as he slithered his tongue up his inner thigh once more, let his cool breath shiver across his sensitive skin, "De… Devil."

He opened his mouth to say something when they both heard a sound from the hall that made them freeze. Gajeel had just enough time to whip his head around when suddenly there were two sharp knocks and the door flew open. Gajeel tensed and Laxus hissed when he dug his claws into the soft of his thigh in a knee-jerk reaction to seeing Bickslow standing, arms-crossed in the doorway.

He grinned like a child who'd just caught his friend sneaking cookies when their mother's back was turned, "Well… I knocked."

"Bickslow!" Freed suddenly came up beside him. "You can't just barge into someone's house and-" he paused, his mouth clamping shut and his face suddenly lighting up like a cherry when he noticed Laxus and Gajeel.

"I hate your friends." Gajeel raged, eyes wild as he yanked from the compromising position and hastily pulled blankets up around their waists.

" _That's_ what I was forgetting…" Laxus purred, not moving from his lounge despite Gajeel's ire, "We're going on a mission today, wanna come?"

The later just seethed as crimson started flecking the skin of his neck and chest. He was so mad he could feel the vein on his forehead starting to swell, "Are you fucking kidding me right now?!"

"It'll be _fuuun_ ," Laxus crooned, enjoying Gajeel's discomfort far too much, "Besides, you need to start getting along with the rest of the Raijinshu."

"Yeah, Gajeel…" Bickslow crossed his arms and leaned against the door frame, "We wanna spend some quality time with you."

Gajeel was furious but Laxus could tell he was also sensible. Through gritted teeth he retorted with crisp words, "Just get outta our fuckin' room already!"

"Don't you two know anything about privacy?!" a shrill voice called just as Evergreen came into view. For a moment Laxus thought Gajeel might actually lose it. She spared them her comments, though, and instead grabbed hold of Bickslow's ear and flared her fan in front of Freed's face, smacking him on the forehead to finally bring his attention away from the couple, "It's no wonder no one wants anything to do with you! Get downstairs!"

"Alright! Alright!" Bickslow danced out of her reach and tromped down the stairs as Evergreen dragged Freed after them. She shot Laxus a harsh look just as she started to get out of view, "The train leaves in an hour!"

He snorted and crossed his arms, "Well… that was fun."

Gajeel just gritted his teeth as he stomped across the floor to grab his clothes, his anger still clear on his face. Laxus just sighed and followed him across the room, pulling on his pants and a sweater before stopping the raging man before he could leave in a huff.

"You don't have to go if you don't want to," Laxus hummed in his ear, running his hand down the length of his arm before intertwining their fingers, "I won't be upset."

Gajeel audibly exhaled and glanced down at their hands, pausing a moment before finally letting out his tense resignation, "It's fine. Let's get going."

Evergreen was nice enough to tell them that they'd need to pack for a couple days' journey and so the five hurried for the train station and just barely got there in time to board and leave. Freed, Bickslow, and Ever all shared a booth across from Gajeel and Laxus, allowing Gajeel to recline once again against the blonde and settle in for the nauseous journey eastward. It wasn't a long ride and for the most part Gajeel spent his time altering between a semi-delirious doze and irritated silence. Bickslow seemed especially rowdy and it took some chastising from both Freed and Evergreen before he'd finally let Gajeel alone long enough to rest.

"I take it the weekend went well after all." Evergreen's lip quirked up sharply as she spoke; she was sure Gajeel had finally fallen into a deep enough sleep that her words wouldn't bother him. Laxus just grinned smugly.

"We had a good time," he rumbled softly, thumbing at his ring as he spoke.

"That's not an engagement ring, is it?" Freed snapped disapprovingly, "Not that I'd doubt your judgment, Laxus, but…"

"It's not an engagement ring," Laxus assured him flatly, "but he does have one that matches."

"You're going steady? How sweet," Evergreen teased before letting her wicked smile lose a bit of its edge.

"Surprised he actually agreed to come with us?" Laxus took his turn to jeer at her and she huffed but not in a sour way. She flipped open her fan and flipped her wrist dramatically and Laxus could already feel the scandalous comment before she said it.

"And was that what you were doing in the bedroom this morning? Convincing him?"

Laxus felt a shock of heat make his neck feel warm, "Actually, no. I was just trying out a new nickname for Gajeel and he was… giving me feedback."

Freed blanched and Bickslow sniggered as Evergreen fanned herself even faster. It was then that Laxus felt the hair on the back of his neck prickle and looked down to see an agitated Gajeel glaring up at him, his fury only held back by the nausea that would overtake him if he got too riled up. Laxus smirked down at him, feeling very much as if he'd been caught.

"Well… you were," he rumbled down at him, trying to ignore the heat creeping up to his ears.

"Ye tell yer friends _everything_?" Gajeel snapped, a scowl set firmly across his face.

Laxus couldn't help himself. A wicked grin crept across his face, "I didn't tell them about how you called me a god in bed."

He could see the vein on the side of his neck jump as he clenched and unclenched his jaw. Despite his obvious queasiness and the bashful rose fighting to his cheeks, Gajeel's lip curled slightly and he leaned back away from him, crossing his arms and resting the back of his head against the window in such a way that he'd have to look down his nose in order to meet Laxus's eyes. Laxus regretted the comment before Gajeel even opened his mouth in response.

"Shame that, aye, _Fairy_? We can talk about the other things I called you too, if you want." his voice was just a salacious growl and as he raised a studded brow in challenge Laxus felt a rush of heat finally overtake his face. Bickslow lost it in a fit of laughter and Freed and Evergreen just sat in stunned silence, unsure how to react to the sudden heat between the two Slayers in such a small space.

"Fucking Devil," Laxus coughed, trying to shake off his own embarrassment. Gajeel grinned triumphantly just in time for the train to shutter in deceleration. The train lulled easily into the station and the five of them filed out quickly. Although on solid ground, Gajeel didn't immediately slide into a lighter mood like Laxus would have thought. Actually, he seemed to be even more tense than before and his eyes darted quickly about him as he took in his surroundings with a look that said he recognized the place he was in but couldn't quite remember how.

"Oi, what exactly is the mission you guys picked, anyway?" Gajeel piped after Ever took pointe and started leading them into town.

"There's a dark guild in the area that needs disbanded," Ever replied tersely from her place in the lead, "Nothing major."

"A dark guild…" Gajeel muttered, still glancing about. Laxus couldn't tell why he was so guarded. There weren't very many people about, and whenever they came near someone they tended to make themselves scarce in one way or another. The houses and shops looked rundown and the whole town seemed to need a fresh coat of paint. It was obvious that this wasn't a place that attracted a lot of money, something that piqued Laxus's interest. For all five of them to go on a mission the reward must have been pretty high. What kind of money did these people have to pull together in order to afford their services?

"What city is this, again?" Gajeel spoke this time even softer than previously and a sudden stillness came to his features as he did so.

Freed glanced over his shoulder at him, "Datura… why?"

Gajeel's eyes widened just slightly but he quickly averted his gaze, "No reason…"

"Eh? Is something wrong?" Laxus pressed, not wanting to put Gajeel on the spot but also wanting to abate whatever worry it was he had before it could take hold.

"No, nothing… I just, uh, don't know if you guys really need me here, is all," he lied horribly. Laxus narrowed his eyes at the raven who just responded by casting his eyes to a nearby alley as if he were interested by something hiding in the midafternoon shadows. Suddenly, he stopped in his tracks, his eyes widened in a look not too dissimilar to shock, "What the fuck..."

The rest of them stopped and followed his gaze to a large symbol painted in black in the alley. It looked to be an incomplete circle opened upward with a dot in the middle and a tail that came up and circled over itself from arch. Two points stuck out from either side of the tail and they twisted, looking like gnarled demon's horns protruding from the thing, and a line sliced it right down the middle. It was a mockery of the symbol of Phantom Lord, turned upside-down with a line down the middle and larger protruding spikes. When the realization hit him, Laxus was suddenly very aware as to why Gajeel had seemed so shifty as they walked through town.

"I thought Phantom Lord was disbanded?" Freed hummed thoughtfully.

A low growl rumbled in the back of Gajeel's throat and his eyes flashed with outrage, "It was… It _is_."

"Do you know anything about this?" Laxus took a spot beside him and crossed his arms, trying to wrap his head around what the symbol might mean.

"No… but you can bet I'm gonna find out," his voice and demeanor began to take on a strange serene air but Laxus noticed how tightly Gajeel's fists were clenched and the sudden tang of iron that filled the air. He glanced back at Bix who was eyeing the Iron Dragon intensely but with his helmet on it was impossible to tell what exactly is reaction was. He noticed Laxus's look and discretely shook his head, as if to say he wasn't going to say anything about what he saw. Laxus figured he really didn't need to know; he knew Gajeel well enough by now to understand what this meant to him.

"Well… we're not gonna find anything out standin' around," Laxus sighed, trying to maintain his usual nonchalance, "C'mon, delinquent. Let's find out who posted the mission."

Gajeel didn't respond, just turned slowly to follow. He was right on Laxus's heels with the rest of the Raijinshuu following after. Laxus tilted his head back to glance at him.

"You familiar with this place, then?" he raised an eyebrow at the raven who was trying his best to wrestle down his anger.

"Ye… we used to run this town," he growled, shoving his fists into his pockets, "They paid us for protection and we kept out the nearby dark guild…"

"Do you think maybe the dark guild took over after Phantom left?" Freed offered but Gajeel shook his head.

"We stamped out the last of those bastards months before the war against Fairy Tail. If I had to guess, I'd say a group of Phantom Mages moved in to make easy money," he huffed.

Laxus studied him for a minute. Gajeel was visibly angry, but even deeper than that, he looked guilty. He pulled his jacket collar up as if it would somehow hide his unmistakable features and walked with his eyes to the ground the entire time. Laxus sucked in a deep breath and sighed, causing two ruby eyes to dart his way. He leaned a little closer to Gajeel as he spoke, letting his mouth curl up in a smirk.

"Worried someone you used to know might see those marks I left?" he teased, although he wasn't given the satisfaction of seeing rose creep up the raven's throat. Gajeel just snorted bitterly in reply and turned his attention back to the ground, "I don't see how you could possibly blame yourself for Phantom Lord returning. It ain't exactly like you've been near this place since it disbanded."

"Yer right, I ain't been back," Gajeel growled, not meeting his gaze, "An' I didn't know. That don't mean I wasn't partly responsible."

"And how is that, exactly?"

"How in the hell do you think they got the idea? I highly doubt they just woke up one day an' decided to stroll out to the nearest slum and start roughin' up people for money. Hell, those were some of my first missions…"

Laxus chuckled, "You know, one time when I was a kid, I dared Bix to jump off the top of the guildhall," he glanced back at Bickslow who's mouth stretched into a wide grin at the memory, "And you actually did it, didn't ya?"

"Hell yeah I did!" Bickslow cackled, "Gramps had to take me to the infirmary because I broke my arm."

"Did ya happen to hit yer head on the way down?" Gajeel muttered, shooting him a glare that seemed to pinpoint his chest instead of his actual face.

"You wish," he snapped, although not in bad humor.

"Funny enough, Bix didn't blame me for his broken arm," Laxus hummed, gaining a skeptical look from Gajeel, "Wanna know why?"

"Hmph… why?" Gajeel snuffed, already knowing where Laxus's story was going.

"Because I may have given him the idea but _he_ was the one that actually hauled his ass up there and jumped,"

"Daring someone to do somethin' stupid is a little different, don't ya think?" the Iron Dragon growled, clearly not having the impromptu pep talk.

Laxus rolled his eyes, "People make their own decisions, Gajeel. You can do and say want you want, but at the end of the day they chose this path for themselves, you didn't make them."

"Oh, Master Makarov! I didn't know you were here!" Evergreen cooed from behind the two.

"I thought your speech was inspirational, Laxus!" Freed piped up, elbowing Ever out of the way, "Spoken like a true leader!"

"Ya hear that? _Inspirational_ ," Laxus grinned smugly.

"You Fairies and your inspirational shit."

"You're a Fairy, too, asshole!" Bickslow clapped him on the back roughly and caused the raven to jump, glaring at him the entire time, "So you might as well get used to it."

"Alright boys, break it up. We're here," Evergreen pushed past the four of them to stop in front of a small bakery. The group sauntered into the shabby place and were greeted by the ring of a bell. There was some clamor from the other side of the door directly behind the counter and a voice called out for them to take a seat and he'd be out in just a moment. The booths were worn and many of them had rips in places. Freed and Evergreen took one seat while Bickslow and Gajeel sat at the other. Gajeel sat at the very edge of the seat, arms crossed, with a scowl set across his features, leaning as if just touching Bickslow might cause him to contract some strange disease. Laxus crossed his arms and leaned against the booth, pulling his jacket closer around his shoulders as he waited.

After a few moments of listening to Freed mutter about how the presentation of the little place was drab to say the least, the door swung open and a tall, slender man made his way to the counter. He had bags under his eyes and a nervous look on his face, but he greeted them with a smile that pulled weary wrinkles to scrunch up around his eyes.

"Hello there, I'm Hasso, what can I help you all… with…" his eyes landed squarely on Gajeel and his smile faded just a bit. Laxus could smell the sudden nervous fear in the man fill the air. He glanced down to the raven who eyed the man out of the corner of his eye, stone-faced despite the obvious disquiet.

Without skipping a beat, Evergreen pulled out the flier and slid it across the table, "We're here in response to this request," she stated gently, "You need help getting rid of a dark guild?"

Hasso glanced down at the flier and laughed nervously, "I-I'm not sure what you mean. We didn't post a request… especially not for a dark guild… maybe you're at the wrong place?"

"Is this not your address?" Freed motioned to the meeting point listed and the man seemed to pale slightly.

"I… I don't know how… I'm truly, very sorry… there's been a mistake…"

Just then, a form dashed from behind the counter. A boy not older that seventeen rushed over, "Wait, wait! You're responding to my flier?" he seemed excited and his face was alight as he spoke, "You'll take out the guild?"

Just at a glance Laxus could tell the two were father and son. The boy had the same gaunt features although his hair was a shade darker, no doubt due to the lack of grey that his father was already producing.

"That's right," Laxus stated firmly, before glancing to Hasso, "What can you tell us about it?"

Hasso yanked his son back by the collar, his eyes hard as he spoke more to his son than to the five mages, "No, _no_! We don't need any help," he glanced nervously towards Gajeel once again, "Thank you, really, but my son is confused. He doesn't know what he's talking about."

"I'm not confused, Dad! We need help!"

"No we don't!" his voice held a finality that his son didn't have the courage to contest and his eyes sank to the floor before his father addressed the group again, this time with the same forced smile he'd had before, "I'm so sorry, really, I'm embarrassed. Please forgive him… like I said, he's very confused… I, um, let me, let me get you something… as a token of my appreciation. Yes… um, just-just one moment…"

With that he gripped his son by collar once again and dragged him back to the storeroom behind the counter. Laxus could hear harsh murmurs just barely hushed enough for him to be unable to make them out. No doubt Hasso was berating his son… but why? Laxus turned his gaze to Gajeel who had a puzzled glower set across his face.

"Know him?"

"Hell maybe, I dunno… I don't remember _everyone_ I hit up for chump change," Gajeel growled back.

"Well… he obviously knew you,"

"Yeah and who probably doesn't around this place? Like I said, this used to be one of Phantom's stomping grounds. It ain't exactly like we were hard to miss," he sounded bitter and it grated a little on Laxus's nerves but he didn't say anything about it. Just being here was probably hard for him.

"Well, it really _is_ a waste of time now," Evergreen crossed her arms and Laxus shot her a hard look, "What? It's not like we can take the mission."

"I doubt they'd be able to pay the reward out, anyway," Freed thought out loud, "It's not exactly like this place is into money."

"Aww… Freed… you wouldn't just help these people out of the kindness of your heart?" Bix teased, feigning shock, "I'm surprised by you."

"What? I wasn't saying that! I was merely stating that we wouldn't get paid if we took the mission anyway!"

"How do you know they don't have a savings stockpiled somewhere? Jeez… you think a place is rundown and you won't even give it a chance."

"Give it a chance! Give it a chance!"

Gajeel rolled his eyes as Bickslow's babies swooped down to aid in his mocking. As they bickered, a ringing of the shop bell caught Laxus's attention and he glanced over to the door just as two large, rough-looking guys stalked in. They didn't even regard the visitors as they entered, just immediately stood at the register. Laxus turned to get Gajeel's attention but he noticed his ruby eyes were already trained on the pair. He gently turned his head and rested his chin in the palm of his hand, letting his ebony hair fall down his shoulder so if they glanced his way they'd only get a peek at his face but he'd still be able to observe them at his leisure. Laxus again could taste the sharp tang of iron in the air and briefly wondered if maybe Gajeel recognized them.

One of the men knocked on the counter, "Hasso! Aschwin! Ya got customers waitin'!"

Hasso emerged almost immediately, his face paled and his hands gripping his apron anxiously, "Y-yes sirs… good to-good to see you! How can I-?"

"We're here to collect our fee," the larger of the two stated, leaning onto the counter, "Hurry up, we got places to go."

"I-I yes… yes of course!" he immediately opened the register and began collecting its contents. Laxus began to take a step forward and bumped into Gajeel's leg. He glanced town at the raven who cocked and eyebrow and mouthed 'wait' at him. Laxus took in a breath to calm the buzzing in his veins that was propelling him to action. Freed and Evergreen looked confused, looking at him pointedly for direction when he usually should have been springing to the defense of the man behind the counter.

Laxus just crossed his arms, "We'll see how this plays out." Freed's eyes widened but he didn't say anything and Ever flipped open her fan tersely, attempting to hide her dissatisfaction.

"Oi? What's this?" the shorter man raised his voice. He was slim with short black hair cropped with a side shave, "There's less here than last week! Where's the rest?"

"We-we don't have-don't have-"

"God's alive, Hasso, spit it out!"

"That's it-it… We don't-we don't have any-anymore…"

The larger man scoffed, "You're kidding…"

"Guess we'll just have to report it to Kurogane… he won't be happy. I'd hate to see something bad happen to this place… I personally enjoy family businesses… wasn't this your grandfather's shop too?"

Laxus glanced down to see Gajeel's eyes blazing. He immediately went to stand and Laxus put his hand on his shoulder and somehow Gajeel found a way to stop himself, "Wait."

"K-Kurogane… p-please… I-If you come back-come back tomorrow…"

"No can do, Hasso, you know the rules. We'll make sure the master understands the _whole_ situation…"

Laxus released Gajeel who immediately stormed for the two. Hasso paled and jumped back, causing the two to turn and see what it was that had startled him. The larger man had little time to react before Gajeel punched him square across his jaw, sending him sprawling to the ground. The shorter man's eyes widened in horror and to the surprise of everyone in the shop, Gajeel didn't hit him or even reach for him. He just turned to face him, eyes raging and a sneer slowly spreading across his face.

"Hey there Krew," he crossed his arms and glowered down at him, solidly a head taller than the smaller mage, "Long time no see."

"Gajeel…" his voice caught in his throat as he spoke, "I… yeah… long time…"

"Ya needed ta tell me somethin'?" he leaned downed to eye the shifty man who took an uneasy step back. The larger man struggled up to his feet but before he could make a move, Laxus sent a bolt of lightning flying into leg so he'd falter and fall back to his knees.

"I uh…"

"If ye been throwin' my name around, ya better have a damn good reason."

"We-uh… it wasn't our idea!" he blurted at last and Gajeel's sneer fell away into an annoyed glare.

"It never is with you because yer too stupid ta come up with anythin' on yer own, Krew." Laxus snuffed at his tone of voice. He'd heard him like this before and the memory put a sour taste in his mouth, "Whose idea was it?"

"Li-listen… Gajeel, you know I looked up to you in Phantom Lord, _really_ , but when you left and the Element Four were gone, we had to look after ourselves, yeah? Who would respect us when our top mages were all taken out, eh?" he retreated another step but Gajeel didn't let up, he stepped right along with him, his overbearing presence like a dark cloud closing Krew in.

"Whose idea was it, Krew?" his voice was startlingly even and Laxus could see Krew visibly cringe at his tone, "I'm losing my patience."

"He's the new master, goes by Unaven… he took over after Aria was put in jail… yeah… and he, he came up with the idea that since you never came back it would be easy, right? Since you had so much sway in the community…"

Gajeel cracked. He gripped the man by his throat threw him up against the wall. In an instant Laxus was across the room, grabbing him by his arm in an attempt to stay his hand.

"Gajeel, calm down," Laxus commanded, digging his fingertips into his arm. Gajeel didn't listen, his eyes were centered on Krew with an icy look that told Laxus he was ready to strangle the man to death. He dropped his voice down to a low growl and leaned closer to his ear, "You'll regret it later if you don't, Redfox."

Gajeel's eyes flashed towards the blonde and in the same instant he dropped the man who gasped for breath at their feet.

"I thought I told you not to call me Redfox," Gajeel breathed, almost visibly shaking off the haze of rage that he was fighting through.

Laxus tried to make his voice lighter, "Right… we got what we needed, Delinquent. Time to let the bad guys go."

"And why in the hell would we let them go?" Gajeel growled, barely remaining still as the larger mage grabbed a hold of Krew and the two stumbled out of the shop.

"So we can follow them back to the Dark Guild," Laxus purred. He rested his hand on top of Gajeel's shoulder, "You got a little intense there. You think you can handle this mission with it being so personal?"

Gajeel didn't respond, just closed his eyes and let out a tense breath.

"You… you're him! Black Steel Gajeel!" the boy from before emerged from the back, Aschwin, Laxus remembered. He stared with wide eyes at Gajeel, enamored and in awe of the man before him, "Kurogane."

"I'm retired," Gajeel stated flatly.

"But you're _here_ , you're not with the Phantom Risers?"

"Phantom Risers?" Gajeel sniffed, "What a fucking ridiculous-!"

"No, he's not," Laxus stated, glancing over to Hasso as he spoke, "And it looks like we're taking the mission whether you like it or not."

"But… but no…" Hasso stuttered but Laxus didn't let him finish.

"Doubt this guy's just gonna be ok with them spreadin' his name around like that so we might as well make it a group effort, right guys?"" he glanced over his shoulder to see the Raijinshuu nodding in affirmation, Bickslow with a wide grin plastered across his face.

Freed rose then, still slightly shaken from the whole encounter, "Well… you might as well tell us everything we need to know."

"N-no… No!" Hasso stated firmly, shooting daggers at the mages, "Mages… Mages got us into this mess an' mages-mages will just make it worse!"

"With all due respect-" Ever started but Hasso was finished with the conversation.

"No! We don't-we don't n-need help! Esp-Especially not from m-mages!"

"But Dad," Aschwin put his hand on his father's arm, trying to calm him but immediately gaining a hot glare, "If they can get rid of the Phantom Risers, we don't have to pay them anymore. We can actually make a _profit_ … we can keep the shop and we don't have to be afraid anymore."

"Aschwin, do you-do you know what you've do-done? They'll be-they'll be b-b-back," he jabbed a finger at Gajeel, "because of _him_. Th-th-they'll burn the place to the-to the-to the-t-t-…" He stamped his foot on the ground as his anger and frustration finally took it's hold over him. He glared at Aschwin and then Gajeel and finally laid his eyes to rest on Laxus, "Get-get out."

"You got it, old man," Gajeel scoffed, gaining a derogatory look from Hasso and a whine of disbelief from Aschwin.

"Wait… you _can't_. You can't just leave!"

"Pops doesn't want our help and I know better than to stay where I ain't wanted," Gajeel growled, shooting a look to Laxus, "I'm gonna take a walk. 'Meet ya outside."

"Right…" Laxus muttered before glancing at Bickslow who was removing his helmet. Laxus sighed, "Be quick."

Bickslow's eyes lighted up bright green, "Hasso, buddy, you sure there's _nothing_ you want to tell us about the Dark Guild?"


	48. Chapter 48

Gajeel stepped into the crisp, wintery air and let out a steadying breath. His stomach turned angrily with iron and he stuffed his hands into his pockets, starting off down the sidewalk. It wasn't hard to get out of eyesight, there was hardly anyone about and those who were scattered quickly. He gritted his teeth. He used to like that; that feeling when he knew that everyone was dodging out of his way. He had liked being feared. It was addictive and toxic… and now more than ever it was bittersweet.

Once he'd moved to Fairy Tail, once he'd actually had people he could call family and friends, he never wanted to feel that way again. To be feared was one thing but having people respect you, look up to you, and want to be near you… that breathed life into an otherwise dark and solitary existence. The people of Datura had that taken from them forcibly before Gajeel had joined Phantom Lord, but that didn't mean he didn't help perpetuate and even deepen that same hold. He'd run the town, after all. And no, maybe he wasn't the Master or maybe he didn't get off to seeing people suffer, but that didn't mean he didn't leave his mark… and boy was it a mark. It was a mark so scarred and so deep that someone felt fit to make their home in Kurogane's remains. Like a phoenix rising his past just kept haunting him. He gritted his teeth against the idea that maybe he'd never be free of its talons.

He reached into his jacket and pulled out his pack of cigarettes. He lit one and put it to his mouth as he walked, taking as deep a dreg as he dared before letting the smoke ease from his nostrils and then finally breathe out a cloud of the foul smoke. He passed the alleyway where they'd seen the symbol of the Phantom Risers and stopped, a prickle of rage eating away at his chest as he stared.

"What a stupid fucking name," he growled as he studied it, "And _Kurogane_ is their Master."

He chuckled darkly to himself and smirked. He used to send messages all the time, didn't he? It had been one of his favorite pastimes. There was just something about desecrating something dear to another guild that could slaughter morale and reduce a bunch of otherwise fearless mages into nothing more than sniveling runts. Without a second thought, he activated his Iron Shield, flexing his hand as he walked up and glancing down at his talons. It was a simple message that he carved into the brick over the symbol and it stood out starkly white in contrast.

 _KUROGANE HAS RETURNED_

He eyed his handiwork before taking a solid leap to the roof of the building. From that height, he looked for the two mages that had retreated from the small bakery just moments earlier. He ran east, his nose not much of use since he was smoking, and quickly spotted them making their retreat. He ducked down and stalked as close as he dared, although in all their frantic checking to be sure they weren't being followed they not once checked the rooftops. That didn't stop Gajeel from being careful, though.

"I thought he was in jail!" thanks to Laxus, the larger mage was still walking with a limp. Gajeel scrunched up his nose. The poor bastard would be feeling that for the next couple of days.

"So did I!" Krew muttered, helping the other along, "Unaven ain't gonna be happy…"

"I can't believe ya told him," the larger mage growled, "Ya get under the tiniest bit of pressure Krew and ya crack!"

"Says you! He took ya down in one swing!"

Gajeel stole himself to the next rooftop to keep in line with the two. Just as they passed the last house heading out of town, he finally let loose the rampant Iron energy that had been bubbling inside of him ever since he'd seen the Phantom Risers insignia. With an easy throw, he launched four of his Iron Dragon's Clubs over to block their exit and the two danced back in shock and terror at the sudden wall protruding from the ground in front of them. He growled as he leapt from the townhouse he'd been perched on and landed precisely on one of his clubs, squatting down slightly so he wouldn't tower over them so. Krew immediately paled and the other mage took on a strong stance, ready to fight.

"You two didn't get far, eh?" he grinned, "You can calm down… I ain't here to fight."

The larger mage didn't respond but he didn't lower his defense, eyes watching Gajeel like a hawk. He was wide and tall, but not as tall as he, and he was young. Gajeel hadn't noticed before how young he really was. The kid couldn't have been a day over nineteen. A nasty scar on his neck that disappeared under the lip of his tunic told Gajeel he'd already seen enough action to not be taken lightly.

"What the hell do you want?" the kid sneered up at him, eyes fiery.

"First of all, ye ain't gonna take me down, not after Laxus hit you with his lightning. Ya won't be fast enough," Gajeel's smile disappeared as he regarded him but the kid didn't break, "Second, I'm here to get some information."

"We ain't talkin'!" Krew hissed, standing somewhat behind his comrade in a show of his true cowardice. Gajeel sniffed and rolled his eyes, taking a draw from his cigarette before hopping down to be on their level. He pulled out his pack and offered it to the kid who glared at him for just a moment before taking one.

"So… how'd ye get mixed up with the Phantom-wannabes?" Gajeel hummed.

"I don't see how that's any of your business."

"T's not. But ya don't seem as dimwitted as yer partner there, and you obviously do the heavy-lifting… looks like a guy like you could do better."

He narrowed his eyes at Gajeel, "If all yer doin' is makin' small talk, then we're leavin'."

Gajeel sighed and reached into his jacket to pull out a small roll of jewels, "I got a couple questions an' I ain't been in the business for a while so I need help gettin' answers."

"We ain't tellin' you where the guild is," he said coolly, eying the money in Gajeel's hand.

"T's fine. We'll find ya one way er another," the mage narrowed his eyes but Gajeel didn't elaborate, "I'm actually askin' about somethin' else… is Phantom still in touch with all of their old clients?"

The two watched him steadily but didn't make a move to answer. Gajeel raised his eyebrow but took the silence as affirmation.

"Does the name Ulrich mean anything to you?"

"Ulrich?" Krew hissed, "What the hell do ya need ta know about them?"

"You don't share all yer business with me, I don't share mine with you," Gajeel growled, noticing the unsteady calm that fell over the two, "Ya'll run with 'em?"

"Ain't no mage runs with the Ulrich family," Krew muttered, "And they ain't recruitin'. Only certain people are allowed to work with 'em… an it ain't the warm-blooded variety, if ya get me."

"What do ya mean?"

"They're a bunch a lizards," the taller mage took a large step closer and dropped his voice, "An not by magic either."

Gajeel clenched his jaw, a sudden remembrance of golden eyes and sharp teeth making his palms start to itch. Lizards? Gajeel tried to remember the words he'd heard Bianca say when he'd caught her cornering Laxus. He'd only caught bits and pieces… about being able to disappear if you weren't gazing directly at her. He'd known her voice to change… and the time in the pool when he'd tried to grab hold of her and she just seemed to vanish, barely out of reach. But… a lizard? What did he even know about lizard-folk that would make them like that? And without magic on top of it all?

Gajeel ran his tongue against his teeth, trying to decide what he needed to say. From the looks of the two mages in front of him, whatever relationship the Phantom Risers had with the Ulriches was shaky at best. They were obviously wary, and the way the larger mage dropped his voice implied they didn't want to be caught talking about them. He clenched his jaw.

"Who's yer contact?" Krew edged up close as well, his eyes darting to a nearby alley as if checking for prying eyes.

Gajeel glanced behind the two into the street and then glanced into the surrounding flatland, "Why don't we walk, eh?" he plucked a couple of bills from his roll and slipped some to each of them, "We'll talk about specifics on the way… I know Krew, what can I call you?"

"The name's Ezal," he narrowed his eyes at Gajeel, "Just because yer payin' me doesn't mean I'll pull my punches later."

"Of course," Gajeel smirked as they continued out of town, "I wouldn't expect anythin' elese."

"This guy's been around the ring before," Krew elbowed Ezal with a chuckle.

"Hmph,"

"My contact was Bianca Ulrich." Gajeel lit another cigarette as he walked, trying to ignore the stillness in the air.

"Bianca, huh? She was one helluvah woman…" Krew groaned, "Her and that asshole of a bodyguard… Ceatus?"

"You seem to know a lot about her," Gajeel droned quietly.

"I'm surprised she didn't mention the Phantom Risers… she'd commissioned some of our guys to run her facility…" Krew muttered, glancing over to Ezal.

Gajeel felt angry heat start to settle in his chest. He remembered being tied up and a voice he recognized… someone from Phantom Lord…

 _"_ _They sang your praises at Phantom Lord… I wonder what Master Jose would have thought if he knew this was what you really were,"_

Gajeel gritted his teeth, trying to let the cold bite of the early winter chill the sudden hate flaring in his veins. He couldn't lose his cool now, he wouldn't get anywhere if he did. He was lucky enough that the Phantom Risers even kept contact with some of the old Phantom Lord clients… and that the Ulriches were some of them.

"Yeah? Anyone I knew?" Gajeel didn't make eye contact as he spoke and instead stared pointedly at his cigarette, "Maybe I can get into touch…"

"Can't," Ezal cut him off before he could finish, "They're all dead."

Gajeel stopped and looked over to Ezal, scrunching his brows in an attempt to seem concerned, " _What_?"

"Yeah… ten of our guys along with whoever else she had hired… even her guard dog. All done singlehandedly from what I heard," Krew smirked, "No one in the place made it out alive."

"What happened? Competition take her out?"

"Dunno. If they did, no one came forward to take her place,"

"I think it was an inside job," Ezal muttered as he blew out a cloud of smoke, "How else would they have known the facility so well?"

"They knew the facility?" Gajeel pressed, his heart picking up pace.

"They had to. They pulled the tapes."

"Really…" he stared down his cigarette again, trying to curb the nervousness building in his stomach, "…yer right… it does sound like someone trying to cover their tracks."

"That could mean _anyone_ ," Krew sniffed, "A well-trained merc would know to do that. Hell, we were trained to do that during missions, eh, Gajeel?"

"I just said it sounded like someone tryin' to cover their tracks," Gajeel feigned like he was contemplating the whole thing, "But the Magic Council is involved. How do ya know they don' have 'em?"

Krew and Ezal exchanged a look before Ezal spoke, "A guy from the Magic Council showed up and asked about it… and he was one of _them_."

Gajeel's heart sank, "One of them? One of the Ulriches?"

"Aye," Krew dropped his voice again, "An' get this… he was a Lieutenant… had a real fancy name, too. What was it Ezal? Damion? Daton?"

"Davian Bishop."

The two stared at him for a moment before Krew snickered, "Sounds like ya know 'im?"

"We've met," Gajeel spat angrily, "He wants me locked up."

Krew snorted, "Who doesn't?"

Gajeel laughed, albeit bitterly, "Good point."

He turned to them, then, and offered his hand to shake theirs. Krew took it graciously and Ezal hesitantly, still watching him coldly the entire time. He paid them a fair price for their information and gave them both a cigarette for the road.

"If ye find out anything else, get the information to Hajime… you remember 'im, eh, Krew?"

His eyes widened slightly, "How could I not? He works for you now?"

"Nah, he's straight and not interested in getting back in the business. He owed me a favor and I called it in."

"Right, right… beggin' yer pardon, but… why _do_ you want to know about the Ulriches? Callin' in a man like Hajime… that don' exactly sound like a side job." Krew pressed lightly, clearly not wanting to upset the Iron Dragon.

He regarded him for a moment, then looked at Ezal, before finally summoning up the best shadow of his old self he could muster and flashing his sharper teeth in a cocky grin, "I can image you'll find a way ta put two and two together, so fine, I'll let you in on a little bit. This Davian guy is tryna put me away an' I think it has something to do with someone higher than him."

"And… and you think it was her? Bianca?" Krew paled slightly.

"I did… until she suddenly disappeared… an' now I know why," Gajeel's smirk faded, "So now I have to work my way up."

Krew and Ezal shared another look and this time, Ezal cleared his voice, "I hope yer wrong, Kurogane. They ain't people to be messin' with."

"Why? You know somethin' else?" he cocked his head to the side as he spoke and Ezal seemed shaken by his casual attitude.

"T's just rumors," Krew hissed, "T'ain't nothin' ta take serious…"

"They're man-eaters," Ezal continued, refusing to be shut down, "Called themselves chameleons… look 'em up. They're wicked as hell and if yer targeted by 'em, ya might as well be dead."

Gajeel smirked, "I ain't dead 'til I'm in the ground, kid. But thanks, I'll be sure ta do my homework."

He left them and headed back towards town. As he walked away he heard Ezal muttering to Krew.

"Should we have told him all that?"

"Kid… you'll learn one day ta pick yer battles… Anythin' yer gettin' paid for is good enough."

Gajeel smirked. Good ole Krew; at least he knew he could always trust Krew to only ever be just what he was, a slimy son of a bitch.

Finding the Raijinshuu wasn't hard. Actually, they were right where he thought he'd find them. They were all congregated outside the bakery, loitering in silent cold awaiting his return. He'd taken the rooftops again and so he had to leap from the top of the building to land at Laxus's side. The blonde raised an eyebrow at him.

"Oi, what took ya so long?"

"Just tryin' ta get some answers… you guys know where the guild is?"

"East," cast his eyes down the direction Gajeel had gone earlier, "They repurposed an old fort, it seems."

"Say what you want about the old man, he makes good bread," Bickslow muttered through a mouthful of sweet buns, "An' he's got a good memory."

"Poor guy…" Gajeel muttered but Bix just show him a wide smile.

Laxus took in the two for a minute as they headed down the street, "Bickslow has used his Figure Eyes on you, Gajeel?"

Gajeel glared seeming down at Bickslow's feet, " _Once_ and it will never happen again."

"I commend your enthusiasm but that's nearly impossible to guarantee. All he has to do is make eye contact with you," Freed sighed, crossing his arms firmly.

"You've used it on Freed." Laxus addressed Bickslow directly and jumped back slightly, pulling his mask back over his face to cover his eyes.

"Gajeel needed to work through something, it wasn't a fight. And it _did_ help, didn't it?" he defended nervously, as his babies swooped closer overhead.

"It helped! It helped!"

" _AndFreed_ , if you'd like to elaborate as to what happened when I used it on you, be my guest," his voice took an edge then and a maniacal grin tugged at his lips. Freed immediately turned a deep shade of crimson and coughed anxiously.

"Y-yes well… it was still a bit uncalled for…"

Bickslow wrapped his arm around Freed's shoulders and Gajeel could just barely made out the words, "I'll keep that in mind next time…"

He cocked a studded brow at them and Freed somehow managed an even deeper shade of red before quickly pushing Bix off of him, muttering about personal space the entire time. Gajeel took a deep breath in, trying to discretely taste the air as Freed powered ahead of him and Bickslow took on an easy jaunt beside him. He crossed his arms and leaned slightly away from the taller mage, sending him a knowing look aimed directly at his shoulder. He heard Bix chuckle, trying to draw Gajeel's attention away from himself.

"Well, true to his word, Laxus, your boyfriend refuses to look me in the eyes even when I have my mask on."

"Smart man," Evergreen fanned herself as she walked alongside Laxus, "Laxus, has he never used his Figure Eyes on you? Not even to see what it's like?"

"Can't say I've ever been particularly interested," Laxus stared at the sky above them and noted the way the grey skies were rolling in darker, angrier snow clouds, "Not even before."

"Before… what?" Evergreen looked at him questioningly and he just smiled gently down at her.

"I lost control of my body once… I'd rather keep it from happening again."

Gajeel felt his stomach flip nervously from the sudden dark tone the group had fallen into. The whole of Raijinshuu seemed shocked at his words, although Freed seemed to be processing. Bickslow tilted his head back slightly to look at his leader, all traces of a smile gone, and Evergreen paled.

"What… what happened? Who could have done something like that?" she spoke her thoughts aloud, although they seemed to be mostly to herself.

"Someone who's not with the living anymore," Gajeel muttered, before glancing back at Laxus who's eyes seemed to be focused on something in the far distance, "Don' worry, Sparky, if it ever happens again I'll knock some sense inta ya."

Laxus stepped up next to him, causing Bickslow to make a sudden dodge to get out of the way, and wrapped his arm around the raven, "Of course… I wouldn't expect anything less."

Gajeel responded by intertwining his arm under Laxus's jacket and around his waist. Bickslow and Evergreen shared a look as they watched two. What they once thought to be a strange and explosive couple suddenly looked extremely tame and supportive. Evergreen fanned herself lightly, this time using it to cover her mouth as she whispered to Bickslow.

"They do seem sort of good for each other… don't they?"

"You have no idea," Bix's lip quirked up slightly, "If you could see what I see, you would have thought that a long time ago."

"Really?" she hummed, "And what _do_ you see?"

"I see…" he ran his tongue across his lower lip as he thought about what to say and Ever waited patiently, used to her strange friends' reserved nature about what he saw when examining souls and more than a little surprised that he was even considering sharing what he was seeing with her, "Laxus become softer, less a brash and more thoughtful… and Gajeel is calm."

"Calm? He doesn't seem that riled to me."

"He hides it well," Bix's smile faded then and he became fixated on the pair, "They share things with each other that I don't think they share with anyone else…" then he added more flippantly, "Could be soulmates… if I believed in that type of thing."

"Really…? Makes me wonder…"

"Want me to tell you what I see when I look at you and Elfman?" he teased, grinning so wide his tongue lolled out of his mouth.

"Keep those eyes to yourself," she tutted, smacking him in the chest with her fan as he cackled.

They ended up making camp outside of town instead of attempting to stay at one of the inns. The night was bitterly cold and since there were no trees there was nothing to break the wind. Freed set up a barrier around them while Gajeel started a fire, more for light than for warm since the cold couldn't touch them inside Freed's protective barrier. After sharing a light meal of the bread they'd gotten from Hasso's bakery and some jerky, the lot of them settled in for the night. Gajeel didn't bring a bedroll, he didn't really use one even when he did work along. Instead, he stretched out on the cool ground and tucked his arm behind his head, watching the clouds part every so often to reveal the moon.

A shuffling beside him caught his attention and Laxus laid out his roll perpendicular to the Iron Dragon and, without asking, laid down so that his head rested on the raven's chest. Gajeel readjusted so that he could pull one of his arms free and run them through his blonde hair, gently mussing his hair this way and that as he gazed up at the sky. Everyone settled into silence, even Bickslows's totems rested silently around his head. Gajeel glanced down at the Thunder God sleeping at his side, studying his face and determined that the man was probably asleep. He counted his slow, steady breaths, and watched the way his pulse jumped just at the soft of his throat. He looked a far cry from the great mage that Gajeel knew him to be in this restful state. Laying at his side, his guard completely gone, with golden lashes reflecting the dance of the fire at Gajeel's feet, he looked porcelain again… fragile.

He hesitated a moment as his eyes trailed to Laxus's scar. Gently, so as to not stir him, Gajeel let his hand ghost over it. When Laxus didn't move, he did it again, this time tracing the dark line. He let his hand fall down the side of Laxus's cheek and drift down his neck. In his sleep, Laxus shivered from the touch and his breath hitched just before he settled. Gajeel took in a deep breath, suddenly feeling nervous.

How had his life come to this? He remembered being out in the wilds by himself, in the middle of nowhere, before a hit mission. It was so eerily similar with the exception of the people laying alongside him now. In the dark, with only the flickering of the fire to keep him company, his eyes would sometimes play tricks on him as his steeled mind would think of his task the next day. He remembered once he thought he saw the deep red of blood on his hands and it had chilled him at the time. Now, when he held his hand up to the sky for him to observe, it was just that, a hand. And he was no longer alone. The weight of his partner against his ribs was enough to prove that, let alone the faint snores from Bickslow and the sighs from Freed and Evergreen.

But that didn't stop the thoughts from trying to break through the thin surface of his calm.

He went back to running his fingers through Laxus's hair, trying to stave off the sudden burning in his chest. Slowly, he worked his way down again, his fingers lingering just a little too long on his neck. He gritted his teeth as his heart began to sink.

 _"_ _You've lived on the edge of loopholes for years…"_

Gods alive, he didn't deserve this, did he?

 _"_ _Do you think you're not disposable?"_

He didn't deserve Laxus.

 _"_ _You're more a fucking beast than you are a man…"_

He snatched his hand back and clenched his fist. It was coming back to him, wave by wave, and he was sinking into the dark ground beneath him. He couldn't stop the memories from coming, ferocious like tigers trying to rip free of the cages of his mind. He could see again his hands around the neck of the man in his cell… the man who'd known him from Phantom Lord. The rage… the heat… the surge of adrenaline… _the taste of iron_ …

He clenched and unclenched his fists. They were shaking.

 _Worthless… Weak…_

He tried to steady himself and pull his thoughts somewhere else. He pressed his free hand to his forehead as if the action would somehow wipe his mind of his sudden spiral. It didn't work.

 _Piece of shit…_

He'd had brown eyes… dammit he knew those eyes but he couldn't place them. He remembered conjuring his iron scales and the pounding of frantic hands on the door. He'd sunken in his claws, he didn't even hear his screams he was so lost in red, in heat, in fury. He'd lost it… dammit, he'd completely lost it…

 _Animal… Monster…_

He hadn't known at the time what they'd used to take him down but later he'd seen when he'd finally gotten out of the cell: cattle prods, just the thing to keep a beast in check. They'd shocked him in his leg so he'd fall but it didn't keep him from holding onto his prize. When they'd gotten the guy free from his hands he'd ripped the flesh of his throat to ribbons. Dear Mavis, there'd been so much blood… on the ground, the door, his hands… his arms…

 _Murderer…_

A white throat that was suddenly red… white and soft… like white porcelain… soft… soft like Laxus's…

He suddenly felt sick and his chest was full of lead… he was light-headed and he couldn't remember when his breathing had become so frantic. Gods… was he losing it again? What the hell was happening? It was like… like when Bickslow had him under his spell…

 _A panic attack… you're having a goddamn panic attack…_

"Gajeel," the voice was quiet and easy, like silk, and suddenly Laxus was over him with golden eyes melting with alarm, "Oi, what's going on?"

"Shit…" he pushed Laxus away from him and sat up, clutching at his chest, trying desperately to calm down, "I'm fine… I just… I need a minute."

He could see the confusion, the unabashed worry, plastered all across Laxus's face. There was nothing amiss, no reason for him to suddenly be like this. Gajeel clenched his teeth, hating himself even more for his reaction.

 _Worthless fucking piece of shit…_

"Gajeel… breathe," Laxus's voice was patronizingly calm, agitatingly level, like speaking to a child that was acting up. It spiked his blood and he closed his eyes against it, trying not to get even more overwhelmed.

 _Weakling… a fucking child…_

"Gajeel…! You're hurting yourself!" he was trying to keep his voice silent, trying to be considerate and do his best not to wake the others, but Gajeel wasn't listening. His eyes were squeezed tightly shut, his jaw clenched, and his hand, the hand that was gripping at his heart as if to try and calm its frantic beat, was slowly digging sharp nails into his tanned skin, was starting to draw blood, and Laxus was becoming panicked.

"I'm fine," he stated firmly, though his voice shook with a feverish tremor. The smell… the smell of blood an iron… if it could choke him Gajeel would have already been dead. Why did it follow him everywhere? Like an omen of death?

 _Laxus hates weak mages… and that's all you are… all you'll ever be…_

Laxus snapped his hands forward and grabbed Gajeel's forearms, pulling them tightly together away from where he could hurt himself. Gajeel's eyes snapped open, then, and Laxus found only unbridled, frantic rage there. He hated it, he _hated_ being restrained. It reminded him of being tied down, of being helpless…

Laxus dropped his voice to a soothing rumble, trying his damnedest to remain level-headed, "You're not helpless, Gajeel," he loosened his grip, slipped his hands up to interlock fingers, "You're not weak…"

 _He's a liar. He's just guilty… because he hurt you…_

He didn't know how but he laughed, he _actually_ laughed, and it was so bitter that it left a sour taste in his mouth, "But I am… I can't… I can't even… fuck…"

 _You deserved it. You deserve worse. You should be dead._

"Gajeel, you're not. You're one of the strongest mages I know, remember? I wouldn't lie about that."

 _You couldn't even jump you fucking coward._

"Gajeel…" Laxus's voice was louder, "You're not listening to me."

"I am… I'm… I'm trying…" he was breathless and he couldn't bring himself to look at him. How could he? He was beyond pathetic, like a child… like a child out in the woods, blubbering and alone… weak… and stupid… and so fucking worthless…

Laxus was reaching, trying to figure out what to say or do to bring him down. It was so hard to tell what was going wrong when he _wouldn't speak_. But he could tell in the bitter misery that filled the air around him, in the unnerved shaking in Gajeel's arm, the erratic breathing, was that he was so _far_ from ok. But where was he? Was he back with Bianca in the dark? Was it an old memory from Phantom Lord that had done this? Had it been sparked by something he'd done? Or maybe just this place, all of the awful memories were maybe just too much for right now? Awful memories… it always came back to that, didn't it? Gajeel just had too much dark to deal with.

"Oi, delinquent, look at me," Laxus rubbed his thumbs against Gajeel's palms, gaining a silent, defeated glare, "I know yer not fine… I can smell it."

Gajeel didn't say anything, just looked back down. To be honest, Laxus wouldn't have needed to smell it to know at that point. He knew that look and it scared him. He suddenly realized where Gajeel was… he was on the cliff again, ready to jump, and Laxus needed to get him back again. He pulled together as much bravado as he had through his blurry concern.

"Probably shouldn't've taught me to control my dragon senses, eh?" he pressed, trying to sound steady and cool.

"Bad idea, that," Gajeel's voice was still shaking but not as badly and Laxus reveled at the miniscule victory.

"I might have lost my mind by now if you hadn't, though… so… thank you,"

"Ain't nothin' ta thank," he was squeezing Laxus's hands tightly as he spoke, slowly becoming steadier.

"There is though," Laxus pressed gently, "You'd been through hell… and it was my fault…"

"It wasn't yer fault," he breathed, finally dropping Laxus's hands. He slouched over, suddenly very tired as the last of his rattled energy was spent. He was self-destructing again, reaching for the pack of cigarettes he thought Laxus didn't know he had even he'd promised he'd quit. This time his hands were shaking so much that he had trouble striking the match and at his second attempt Laxus relented and reached for the book.

"Not gonna lie, I've always wanted ta do this," he smirked as he struck the match and covering the tiny blaze with his hand. He lifted his eyebrow salaciously as he held the light to Gajeel's cigarette, "Come here often?"

"More often as of late," he answered despondently, not even attempting to have humor. He puffed it a couple of times before taking a deep breath and Laxus was reminded of Hajime. Before he could put the pack away Laxus plucked it out of his hand. Gajeel didn't even object, figuring Laxus was going to throw the rest of them into the fire. What he didn't expect was Laxus pulling one out and handing the rest back to him. He gave him a dubious look, "You uhh… you ever smoked before, Sparky?"

"Nope," he responded easily, not perturbed in the least bit by Gajeel's skepticism.

"…no joints?" he asked hesitantly and Laxus just raised an eyebrow at him in response. He took another drag.

"You… you know how ta light it?"

"Let's hope so. Earthland knows your hands are too shaky to handle it," he smirked, but still he hesitated. Seemly calmer, Gajeel reached forward and took the match from his hands.

"Now… ya don't just breathe it in first go, ya gotta get it going first," he muttered as he struck it and lit the end of the cigarette, "…Mine are top shelf so they're a little smoother but don't make yerself sick takin' too deep a breath."

Laxus eyed it for a second before putting it to his lips and sucking it in. It was bitter but just the slightest bit sweet in his mouth and he thought he caught a hint of mint as it whisked down his throat into his lungs. Laxus wasn't sure what Gajeel meant by smooth because it took everything in him not to immediately sputter it out. He quickly exhaled, quieting his coughs into his fist as he fought to retain the slightest bit of composure. He shook his head and wrinkled his nose, looking up to see Gajeel resting his chin in his free hand as he watched, a dry smile plastered on his face.

"I'm corrupting you."

"Shut up. I've always wanted to try them anyway… stop staring."

"I'm impressed, Sparky," he grinned, "I was sure you'd turn green yer first time."

"Glad to exceed expectations," he took another hit, this time holding the smoke down a little better. He definitely caught the mint that time, "You wanna talk about what happened?"

"No,"

"Think maybe you should anyway?" Laxus forced the smoke out through his teeth as he grimaced, trying not to cough, "I think you owe me… for corrupting me and all."

"Hmph… right…" he chuckled in return, although it didn't meet his eyes, "I guess… I guess I just got in my own head."

Laxus waited patiently as the Iron Dragon wrestled with himself and the image in his mind. He itched at his arm nervously before speaking again, "I, uh… I spoke to Krew earlier… tryin' to get some information. Apparently, they had some guys helping Bianca."

Laxus blinked slowly as what he said sank in, "Do they know…?"

"No, no… they uh… they don't know who killed the guys. They think it was an inside job,"

"Did you recognize any of them? You never mentioned…"

"Yeah, I didn't…" he paused and Laxus noticed his hands were trembling slightly again, "Well… there was one guy. I couldn't remember who he was but I knew his voice… and his eyes…"

Laxus's brow furrowed but he didn't want to press him too hard. Gajeel caught his look, though, and took another steadying puff.

"I'd been there a few days… they'd given me better restraints and had locked me in the cell you found me in. I… I don't know if they sent him in or if… if he did it himself…"

"You don't have to…"

"T's fine… I'm fine," Gajeel muttered, truly trying to convince himself it was true, "He uh… he said he wondered what Jose would have thought if he… if he'd know, that I… that I was just some fucking animal… and I… I lost it…" Gajeel's eyes focused into the distance as he spoke and it chilled Laxus's veins. He listened quietly, eyes and ears attuned to his partner, not wanting him for even a moment to think he'd lost interest or wasn't wanting to hear, "It was like a dream… sort of. I, uh, I remember thinking I was gonna crush his throat, that it was probably the fastest way ta kill 'em… but I didn't. I wanted… to rip him apart… for what he wanted to do to me."

He seemed to snap back to reality for a minute, shakily took a deep pull from his vice, and pulled his eyes to study his boots.

"How do you know what he wanted…?"

"He sorta laid it out for me," he breathed a cloud of smoke into the space between them, trying to settle back down, "They uhh… ahem… they took me down with those things… cattle prods? My Iron Shield was up so you can image that didn't feel that great."

"I bet…" Laxus remembered the surveillance screen when he'd been in Bianca's office, remembered how the blood had alarmed him and she'd been quick to assure him it wasn't Gajeel's, "I saw the aftermath. I was worried it was yours."

"It…?"

"The blood. When she'd brought me down there to try and get to you, she had an office with screens and I could see into your room. It was empty so I thought you might have been dead…"

"Yeah… they didn't exactly want to send anyone in ta clean up after that."

"You never told me…"

"I know, I'm… I'm sorry," he growled, scowling down at his hands, "It's hard, Laxus. I've never been helpless, I've never been weak. It was one thing coming to Fairy Tail and losing everything I had, having to figure out who I was without Kurogane and learn how to let people in… have friends… and right, _right_ when I started ta get comfortable, ta figure out what I was and what I left behind, I ran inta you during a mission and all hell breaks loose…"

Laxus felt like his heart stuttered for a minute but he tried to stay steady.

"Don't… don't take it like that, Sparky, that ain't what I meant," Gajeel sighed, noticing the look in his eyes despite his efforts, "I've never been _helpless_ , Laxus. My whole life I've been the strong one that got stronger. I couldn't help you and I damn well couldn't _stop_ you…" Gajeel pressed his cigarette to his lips as he spoke, drawing the cherry almost to the filter with his heavy pull, "And then… just when I'm starting to move past that and try to figure out who I am again, she got to me. And she did exactly what she fucking said she would. She broke me… and when that didn't get her the results she wanted she tried to break me in different ways. It wasn't enough to fucking drug me out of my mind, to force blood, to make it so I couldn't move or speak when they did whatever the hell they wanted to me, she had to _touch me_ …"

He pushed what was left of the cigarette butt into the dirt, tried to ignore the trembling in his hands. Laxus just listened in stunned, horrified silence. He'd speculated but he'd never known exactly what had happened. He didn't know why Gajeel chose to just suddenly let it all out but he didn't want him to stop, not if this could help him. He was so tired of seeing Gajeel broken, he desperately wanted to find a way to help him heal… and this, finally getting it out into the open air, this might work.

"How did…? I mean…" Laxus breathed, not knowing really what to say to help, just tried to keep him talking.

"She tried to get me to bite her… I don't really remember a whole helluvah lot about it. I just really hated everything… the way my body wasn't mind anymore an' how I couldn't stop it. Gods alive, I didn't even care anymore. I wanted them to put me under again, or overdose me, or _something_ that wasn't her touching me… and I got pissed. I snapped the restraints and grabbed her. If I had known or maybe if I were just a little more gone I shoulda killed her then, but I didn't. I told her I'd rip out her fucking neck if she told me to bite her again… that's when she got me on the leg."

"Mavis's sakes…"

"Yeah… I actually thought I was gonna die that time, Sparky, I ain't gonna lie..."

Silence fell over them again as Gajeel lit another cigarette. He seemed almost calm again, as if the whole thing had never happened. His hands were no longer shaking and more than anything he just looked tired. The misery in the air was gone. The panic was over. Laxus felt that he could breathe a little bit better.

"You think you're weak, Gajeel… but that's… that's insane," Laxus mumbled, extinguishing his cigarette in the dirt before throwing it to the fire, "…and somehow you lived through it."

"People have gone through worse, Sparky."

"Maybe they have, Gajeel," he snapped, trying to hold down his anger, "That doesn't make what you lived through any less horrific. You didn't deserve that, Gajeel…"

"…sometimes I wonder, Sparky…"

Laxus didn't let him finish, just the start made him see red with rage. He didn't hesitate, he backhanded him. Gajeel's head snapped to the side from the force and the noise seemed to echo off of every flat surface around them. Laxus realized Bickslow wasn't snoring anymore. The gods knew how long he'd been up and eavesdropping but he was past the point of caring. A pang in his heart told him that his reaction was to rash and he should have found a better way but he gritted his teeth against it.

"Gajeel Redfox, you will _never_ say shit like that again," he seethed, lighting discharging around him as his anger became harder and harder to control, " _You. Didn't. Deserve. That_."

"…I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize to me," Laxus growled, "You didn't insult me, you didn't wrong me. Don't apologize."

Gajeel didn't answer but he also didn't look at him, he just glared down at his boots again with a look that said he wished he could be anywhere aside from in front of Laxus at that moment and it was for that reason that Laxus tried to reign himself back in. Getting angry, and especially responding explosively, wouldn't do any good. If anything it would only feed the dark thing in Gajeel that so desired to self-destruct. He needed to be better.

"I'm… I'm the one who should apologize. I'm sorry," he reached forward slowly and brushed black locks out of the way to reveal the red welt quickly forming across Gajeel's cheek, "That was… that was too far."

"I probably deserved it."

"No, you didn't," Laxus emphasized, leaning forward to trace a gentle kiss where he'd left the mark, "I need to control my temper… it just… you have no idea how much it pisses me off when you say things like that."

"It's how I feel."

"But it's wrong," Laxus dropped his voice to a low growl, "You're not weak, you're not helpless. You fucking beat the odds, Gajeel. Anyone else would have gone insane or given up. You didn't have to endure that… that torture. You could have given her what she wanted and then she would have manipulated who knows how many kids… ruined countless lives… and you stopped her. And then, on top of it all, you made sure she could never do it again. Yes, there are consequences to that decision but… I think you caused more good than harm.

"As for your past with Phantom Lord, Gajeel, it ain't gonna be something you work through overnight. You've said so yourself, you're not looking for redemption for what you did, and I don't think you have to. You were as much a prisoner there as you were with Bianca. You can look back and tell yourself there was a better way or that you could have gotten out but it doesn't matter, at the time you didn't see another option. And if you enjoyed some of the jobs? It doesn't matter. You survived, and when Phantom was disbanded you could have gone right back into the life you'd been living but you didn't. You decided to be better. And you can continue to be better. Take the fight to the Phantom Risers, show them who you are and what you've become. You're not the Kurogane that ran the streets under Jose anymore. You're Gajeel Redfox, the Iron Dragon of Fairy Tail, and you're gonna take back what's yours."

Gajeel's face flushed slightly, "Yer startin' ta sound like Natsu."

"Does Natsu know how good you are in bed?"

Red crept down Gajeel's throat and chest, "I don't see what that has to do with…"

Laxus leaned forward and placed a hand on Gajeel's thigh, "Would me singing your praises put you in a better mood, delinquent?"

"Call me delinquent one more time and see what happens,"

Laxus leaned forward and kissed his lips, running his tongue along his lips and shivering when Gajeel sighed in reply. He lifted ebony strands from Gajeel's face and withdrew, eyeing the red mark where he'd slapped him.

"I am sorry… forgive me?" he murmured just as Gajeel gripped his collar and pulled him back down.

"Nah… I'm gonna remember that shit. I think I deserve a free pass for that."

"What? One free slap on the face of your choice?"

"I'll think a' somethin' I'm sure…" he whispered, pulling Laxus close to breath into his ear, "Maybe I'll just rut inta ya until you scream my name."

Simmering heat shuttered down Laxus's spine at that, "You can just ask for that, you know…"

"Dunno… I sorta liked cuffing you."

"I'll think about it…"

"Not allowed. I get a free pass, remember?"

"Hmph," Laxus pressed his lips into Gajeel's neck and worked his way down to his chest and the angry scratches that Gajeel had left just moments earlier, "You really did hurt yourself, delinquent."

"T's not so bad," Gajeel whispered, unable to resist from running his fingers through Laxus's blonde hair, "Doesn't hurt, anyway."

"You tired?"

"Yeah."

"Same here," Laxus nuzzled into Gajeel's chest and inhaled the sweet smell of tobacco and iron. They laid down on Laxus's bedroll together, Laxus with his arms around Gajeel's torso so he could let his head rest on the raven's chest, "I felt you tracing my scar earlier."

"Mnh? Did you not want me to?"

"It was alright… but you're the only person allowed to touch it."

"What an honor."

"You have no idea."

"Well thank you, Thunder God, Laxus. I will treasure your gift always."

"There's the asshole I know and love."


	49. Chapter 49

_...It hurts_

 ** _It hurts…_**

 _ **. . . . . .**_

 _...Please…helpme..._

* * *

The sound of thunder cracking in the distance jolted Laxus awake.

The cold of the early morning was what came to his senses first, a surprise since Freed's spell should have still been working. He felt a warm, strong arm draped across his waist, holding him close as if trying to comfort him. The weight of his jacket was heavy over his shoulders, the gentle caress of hips pressing mildly into his own and the scent of cigarettes made him feel strangely at ease, like he was home even though he knew he was far from Magnolia. A light touch to his face sent a shiver down his spine. Gajeel's thumb brushed gently over his right eye, tracing his scar, lingering just for a moment on his cheek before returning back to its start just above his brow.

"Mnh… stop…" his voice was husky from sleep and he immediately felt Gajeel draw back. He touched him again, this time running his fingers along his hairline and tracing a path down his temple, the side of his face, his jawline, ghosting down his throat and travelling as far down his collar he could go before Laxus's shirt was in the way. His skin prickled in the places that he touched, forming and invisible track where Gajeel's fingers had been. Gajeel shifted against him, above him, and he could have almost sworn he was _around_ him, overpowering him with an indulgent, protective warmth. The smell of tobacco and iron made his stomach turn expectantly before lips pressed against his. When he finally opened his eyes, he could see the colors of the blood orange sunrise reflected in Gajeel's cat-like orbs.

"Good morning, Fairy," he purred, his face still so close he could almost taste the vibration in the air from his voice.

"Morning."

"Seemed like you were having a bad dream," Gajeel's voice was barely above a whisper, a growl, and his sharp teeth dodged just behind his lips as he pressed his fingertips gently against Laxus's chest.

"I don't know what you mean."

Gajeel clicked his teeth but didn't press the issue. Laxus was suddenly aware that it was quiet and his mind slowly began to register that just moments before there had been the murmurs of quiet conversation before it had ended abruptly. Laxus pushed himself up, his joints stiff from a night on the cold ground, and glanced over to where Bickslow, Freed, and Evergreen were sitting opposite them by the fire. Immediately, Freed and Evergreen snapped their heads to look away, caught staring. Bickslow just smirked at the two as he ate his breakfast.

"Finally awake, love birds?" his grin widened until his tongue flopped lazily from his mouth. Evergreen snickered at the comment but Freed just seemed agitated.

"Why didn't you wake us sooner?" Laxus yawned, convincing his stiff limbs to move and lift him away from Gajeel's warm body. He immediately regretted it when he was greeted with the cold alone, but he slipped his arms through his jacket and did his best to right his clothes, slowly warming back up. Gajeel didn't seemed bothered by the chill, in fact he hadn't even brought a blanket or bedroll, he noticed. He just crossed his legs and let his elbows rest on his knees, completely at ease as he watched his partner move closer to the fire.

Bickslow cackled, "You were just too cute to bother,"

Gajeel rolled his eyes, "How considerate."

"You… you actually call him Fairy…" Freed muttered, covering his mouth with his hands as if trying to hide the furious red creeping across his face, "I thought that was a joke…"

Gajeel sniffed, his lip curling up on one side in response to Freed's agitation, "Only when he's actin' cute."

"You're taking it so personal, Freed. Laxus doesn't seem to mind," Evergreen crooned, aiding in his growing ire.

"Laxus is not _cute_!" he punctuated each word sharply, as if he were hurling his words like darts at Gajeel, "He's glorious, or striking, or-"

"Cute…" Gajeel cut in the word and Freed practically gnashed his teeth, "If Laxus didn't like it, he'd say so."

Laxus snorted, albeit in good humor, "I said I didn't like it and you call me that anyway."

"You said you didn't like it in bed," Gajeel corrected slyly before shrugging, "But yeah I'll probably say it anyway."

"And I can't call you Redfox… or delinquent,"

"Friends don't call me Redfox. If ya call me Redfox, yer gearin' for a fight… and delinquent is just annoying."

"So is Sparky but you won't stop calling me that either," Laxus crossed his arms, his lips curving up at the edges just slightly as he turned his attention back to his friend, "It's not a big deal, Freed. Give it a rest."

Bickslow's obnoxious, borderline-manic laughter filled the air as Freed fumed, "Laxus! I am just out for your honor!"

"I think his honor is wrapped around Gajeel's finger," Evergreen murmured from behind her fan and Freed just huffed.

They settled into quiet conversation, deciding to wait until nightfall before making a move on the Phantom Risers. Gajeel thought it would be best to try and catch them off guard, although they were all certain it would be difficult to accomplish. Laxus didn't say it out loud but he wanted to give Gajeel the reins on this. These were his people, his dark past that he was confronting. Laxus wanted him to do this in his own way and give him charge. He was being discrete, though, and so he had to be more tactful than usual when shutting down Freed who was their usual planner on expeditions like this. It was helpful that Gajeel's plan was a surprisingly good one.

They wait until nightfall and approach from the south. There weren't any towns in that direction and so if a parameter had been set up, more than likely they'd be scarcer on that side. It would involve more walking than Freed or Evergreen were really wanting to do, but if they were going to a quiet entrance it was the best. Of course, Bickslow was ready to just storm through the front entrance and take down anyone who crossed their path, which to Laxus sounded easy enough, but Gajeel was looking for more information. He wanted to know where these people came from. Where they all former Phantom Lord mages? Did they have more bases elsewhere, as Phantom Lord had quite the expansive hold back in their time? And Laxus suspected he was after some other, more personal, tidbits as well, like who exactly was commissioned to work for Bianca when Gajeel had snapped.

He tried not to think about that last bit or what it could mean to Gajeel if and when he found out.

It was late into the afternoon, while the group was lounging around the fire and waiting for darkness to descend, that Laxus noticed how intently Bickslow had been staring at Gajeel the entire day. Bix had even had his mask off and of course Gajeel neither drew attention to it nor did he attempt to stare back. The closest Gajeel's gaze ever made it to Bix's eyes was when the darted to look at his chest when Bickslow came up with an idea. Bickslow really was right, after all, Gajeel refused to make eye contact with the navy-haired member of the Raijinshuu. As if sensing Laxus's thoughts, Bickslow looked over at him, maroon eyes full of questions and mischief.

"What's up, Bix?" he said at length, breaking the otherwise palpable silence. Gajeel glanced over at Laxus, his eyes telling him he'd really wished Laxus hadn't just prompted Bickslow to share with them whatever he'd been contemplating so intensely for what seemed the past few hours.

"Nothing," he said mildly, that wicked look alighting on his features as he spoke, "I'm just overly curious."

"I don't like the sound of that," Ever responded tersely, eyeing herself in a hand mirror she'd brought with her, "Whenever you say something like that it's weird."

"Weird?" Bickslow shot her a hurt look, "So mean, Ever..."

"Overly curious about what?" Gajeel grunted, molding some scrap iron into a long, delicate chain.

"I overheard your conversation last night," Bix spoke so plainly it actually agitated Laxus although Gajeel didn't seem shocked in the least. He didn't even move his eyes from his work, "And I've just always wanted to know something… and you're the only person off the top of my head that I can ask."

Gajeel clenched and unclenched his jaw, "Yeah?"

"Bix," Laxus stopped him before he could ask, "Is now really a good time?"

He pretended to think about it, "Do you care, Gajeel?"

"I don't know yet."

"Fair enough," Bix chuckled, a bit of an overexcited-ness to his tone, "I've always wondered what it's like to kill someone."

Gajeel visibly stiffened at the question, his hands froze for just a moment and then continued through their task. He still refused to look up, "An' why in the hell would you wanna know somethin' like that?"

Bickslow shrugged, "Morbid curiosity."

"I think I just realized I hate it when you start askin' me questions, Bix," Gajeel's voice had razor's edge hidden in it and Laxus immediately thought back to when Gajeel had mentioned Bix using Figure Eyes on him.

"You don't have to answer… but Freed was wondering too."

Freed sputtered, "I-I was _not_! Why would… I wouldn't…!"

"You almost killed Cana when we tried to take over Fairy Tail," Bix pointed out, smirking, "You said you wondered what would have happened if you'd actually gone through with it."

Freed seethed, " _I was drunk when I told you that._ "

"But I wasn't," he spoke with the same waggish tone to his voice that he would if he were playing some sort of prank. His babies chirped happily beside him and Laxus was about to dismiss the conversation when Gajeel let out a long sigh, resigned and thoughtful, and borderline annoyed. He pulled the chain in his hands taught, examining his work briefly before crumpling the piece back together with a flurry of emerald sparks as he melded the metal back into a useless lump. Bickslow looked back at him and his eyes widened slightly as, to the utter surprise of everyone, Gajeel looked him squarely in the eye, intense red challenging Bix's manic burgundy.

"You ever been hunting, Bix?" he started, venom seeping into his voice like tar. Laxus quelled a shiver as he watched shadows starting to dance in Gajeel's ruby orbs like demons waiting to be let out. Even Bickslow seemed to be caught off-guard.

"I, uh… no." Bickslow was _actually_ nervous, a sight Laxus had rarely observed. He always upheld a distracted appearance, maintaining a light-hearted, joking demeanor with the sour tint of something resembling lunacy underneath. Bickslow was a free spirit for the most part, acting on his own whims and hardly ever getting deep enough into something as to allow himself to be nervous, or serious, unless locked in battle with someone. But now he stared unblinkingly at Gajeel, gazing directly into Gajeel's eyes and – Laxus realized – his soul.

He just barely caught the scent of iron.

Gajeel switched gears, propping his elbow onto his knee and letting his face rest against his knuckles, clearly grasping at something else to help him illustrate whatever it was that was happening in his head, "Ever happened upon a baby bird that fell out of its nest? Or held a newborn kitten?"

"Yes."

"When you did, when you held that tiny, defenseless thing in your hands… did you have this strange, intrinsic need to just… kill it?"

The air got heavier, "I… no..."

"I know you have, because deep down we have this strange, built-in need to destroy sweet and harmless things. So… you're holding this thing and imagine you actually act on it. That need to destroy just keeps building up until finally… you just..." Gajeel sounded menacing. He didn't smile, there was no humor in his voice, and as he spoke he moved his hands as if cradling something small there and then slowly, deliberately, he folded his fingers into angry, powerful fists. Laxus could almost feel the _snap_ and he inwardly cringed as his mind processed what it would feel like to crush the life out of some innocent thing. Bickslow blinked and the cold scent of iron grew stronger.

"It's… final and… a little _refreshing_ … cathartic, even, if yer angry enough. It's either quick or slow and that's sort of your choice and also sort of up to the situation. Some guys I knew just liked to draw it out because they got off on that shit, I usually tried to send a message for Jose or Phantom…" he paused, his eyes for just a moment reflecting a time in particular that came to mind before he snapped himself back to reality, "And then it's over. Ya go home knowing ya did yer job and ya did it well… Of course, that's after you've been doin' it a while. The _first_ time I was sent to take a target I had nightmares for a month but I was still green… Jose was desperate for guys so he sent me out."

The last bit he said dismissively, as if tacking in something about the weather or what he was wearing on that day. Bickslow didn't make a noise and neither did Freed or Evergreen. As silence descended again, maddeningly thick and pervasive, Gajeel just kept Bickslow's eyes almost as if to dare him to make a move, to use Figure Eyes or claim he was being dramatic. Bickslow did nothing of the sort, just watched with a growing twinge of amusement on his face, like he was getting to the root of a joke. The entire exchange was startling and intimate to Laxus and it made him increasingly uncomfortable.

"Was that how it felt when you killed Bianca?"

Gajeel narrowed his eyes and his lips drew back in a sneer that clearly showed his canines, "Just how much of our conversation did ya hear, Bix?"

He shrugged, "All of it…" he nodded towards Freed and Ever and they both stiffened in horror, "They did too, they're just too polite to say it."

" _Stop dragging us into your hole_ ," Ever bit through her teeth swiping at him with her fan.

"We were ten feet apart it's not like it was difficult," Bix snickered back at her, easily dodging the hit.

"Let him alone, Bickslow," Laxus growled, wiping the smile off Bix's face as he did so, "Gajeel, you don't have to answer his questions. He's just bein' an ass."

"I am not! I'm genuinely curious!" he replied innocently and his babies chirped their approval, resting on the ground at his feet but with eyes lighting as they spoke.

Gajeel sighed, glanced at Laxus out of the corner of his eye, and spoke again this time with a slight shiver in his voice, "No… no, Bianca was different."

"Different how?"

" _Bickslow_." Laxus's voice was a clear warning but Bix didn't even look at him, he was staring into Gajeel again, engrossed in whatever it was he was discovering.

"How deep are ya wantin' ta go with this, Bix?" Gajeel breathed, crossing his arms and leaning back slightly, studying the other man.

"As deep as I can," he grinned in return.

"Are you fucking psychoanalyzing me?" he sneered, baring his teeth, " _Again_?"

Bix shrugged, "I'm just tryin' ta help ya, man."

"Well do me a favor and don't." Gajeel's eyes suddenly darted to the side, finally done with his staring contest with Bickslow.

"If I wanted to use Figure Eyes, I would have done it a long time ago… then we might be through with this already."

"Fuck off."

Laxus let loose his lightning and it snapped at Bickslow as a final attempt to make him stop, "Bickslow! I said leave him alone!"

"Bix, seriously, stop," Freed pushed, albeit much more gently, his eyes reflecting the apprehension he felt.

Bickslow turned on Laxus and it honestly floored him, "You're not _helping_ him by defending him, Laxus!"

" _You're_ not helping him by breaking him down!" he hurled back, discharging more lightning in his direction, barely missing him his time.

"Tch, Gajeel, tell me I'm wrong, eh? You're sick of it, aren't you? Of being coddled?"

"In. His. Own. Time. _Bix_." Laxus raged, feeling the swell of lightning in the air as he slowly lost his temper, "You don't just wake up and _decide_ to get over shit like this! You struggle with it, sometime for years!"

"Well c'mon, Fairy Tail Mage," Bickslow threw at Gajeel, arms still crossed, no longer facing Laxus in his blatant defiance, "Where's your fighting spirit? Or are you just gonna keep running?"

"I ain't runnin' from shit," Gajeel annunciated each word precisely, only just keeping himself in check.

"Sure ya are. You won't talk about it, won't think about it. What happened to the Gajeel that went at things head on? Confident? Fearless?" Bickslow prodded, eyes alight with unbridled energy, "Are you just going to wallow in your own self-pity forever?"

Suddenly Gajeel was on his feet, rage bubbling just below the surface as he floundered to keep it under, _"Shut the hell up, Bix_."

Bix was on his feet then, squaring up against the Iron Dragon Slayer, "Or what? You gonna fight me? You can't even look me in the eyes!"

Gajeel gritted his teeth. His arms and chest were flexed and glittering scales were fighting to break out along his flesh. His hands were shaking, the sharpness of iron overtook the heavy atmosphere as his magic fought to take hold of him.

"Admit it, Gajeel," Bickslow's voice was as sharp and precise as an arrow aimed for Gajeel's chest, "The only thing stopping your recovery is yourself."

That did it. Gajeel lunged with the most guttural, rancorous noise Laxus thought he'd ever heard from the man and suddenly they were all on their feet as he tackled Bickslow to the ground. Evergreen and Freed yelled at them to stop fighting and Laxus held the two back from being caught in the crossfire as Gajeel wrapped his arms around Bix's waist and tossed him into a heap on the ground, gripping his arm and twisting it painfully into his spine. Bickslow yelped from the pain as Gajeel grappled him, masterfully contorting his body so that he couldn't move, grabbed a fistful of hair and forced him into the dirt. Bix's babies flitted to his rescue but Gajeel's iron scales had taken over and the laser-like projections fired from their mouths and eyes refracted off of his armor harmlessly.

"Gajeel! Let him go!" Laxus roared, not wanting to have to physically rip him away as he again slammed Bickslow back into the ground with the same ferocity as a rabid dog whipping around a half-dead rabbit.

"Fucking! Aahh! Uncle, uncle, let me go! I give up!" Bix wheezed under Gajeel's weight, desperately trying to gain purchase with his knees to try and flip him off. Each time he began to catch hold Gajeel slammed him back down again, a fire in his eyes despite the shakiness of his limbs as he held his offender down.

"Get the fuck up, Bix!" he growled, his voice shaking with barely-contained wrath, "You just gonna wallow in self-pity?!"

"Mavis' sakes, I get it! You're gonna break my fuckin' arm!"

" _Then. Get. Up. Bix._ " His voice dropped lower, malevolence laced into each syllable, "Yer a fuckin' head taller than me, Bix, you got a higher center of gravity. Flip me off. Push yerself up. Ain't no one stoppin' you except yourself."

" _You're_ stopping me! Gods alive, _get off_!" he finally got his feet dug into the dirt enough to buck Gajeel up just as one of his babies swooped down and slammed into the side of Gajeel's face. He lost his grip for only a second and Bickslow took full advantage, yanking his arm free and attempting to pull his legs up underneath him to get away. Just as he did, Gajeel wrapped his arms around his waist and with the type of trained strength expected of a master of hand-to-hand combat and ripped Bickslow from his knees and suplexed him, slamming his head and neck into the ground. Laxus just caught the wide-eyed shock in Bix's eyes before he impacted heavily into the ground and in an instant Gajeel had rolled back to his knees again, pouncing on top of Bickslow before he could have a chance at recovery.

It suddenly dawned on Laxus that Gajeel wasn't actively trying to hurt Bix, just get him on the ground. And although he didn't want them to keep fighting, he couldn't justify shocking them both to end it. Brontide rumbled through the air as he fought to contain himself, to convey warning, just do _something_ that wasn't standing there watching one of his best friends and his boyfriend wrestle around on the ground in an effort to prove a worthless point.

"Laxus," Freed interrupted his thoughts, his right eye becoming infused with his Dark Ècriture magic as he spoke, "If you wish I can make it so they can't fight anymore."

"OR I CAN TURN YOU BOTH TO STONE!" Evergreen yelled at them pointedly, although the two on the ground paid her no heed. Gajeel was straddling Bickslow, pinning his arms down and not allowing him a chance to rise. Each time he tried, Gajeel would use his hips and his body, now almost an impenetrable wall because of his Iron Scales, to force him down, knocking his elbows out from under him every time Bix got the chance to find some grip and get some weight under him.

"Let them fight it out," he said at length and both Ever and Freed seemed stunned, although they didn't say anything contrary to his decision. He sucked in a breath and let it out slowly, driving down his need to release more electricity into the air. If defending Gajeel wasn't helping him then fine he wouldn't defend him, but he wouldn't help Bickslow either.

"Where's your fighting spirit, Fairy Tail Mage?" Gajeel growled, finally having forced Bix where he wanted him. They were breathless, sweaty, and Bix's head was turned to a frightening angle as Gajeel kept his head pinned to the side, unable to look up at the Dragon Slayer and take him over with his soul-manipulating magic.

"I told you, I give up…" Bix gasped through his gritted teeth, "What do you want? An apology?"

"I want you to understand what it's like to fight against something you know will win," Gajeel hissed back at him, not allowing him the slightest inch to move, "Do you think I want to be like this? Having nightmares? Fucking panic attacks in the middle of the night because I touched Laxus's neck in just the right way that I… that I can f-… I can _feel_ it all over again?"

Bickslow didn't respond, just glared into the ground.

"Face it head on, Bix? How do you fucking face something that ya know is just in yer head? If you know then fucking tell me because I don't and it fucking pisses me off..." the anger in his voice was falling, turning sour. He wasn't brutally angry anymore, wasn't even lecturing the man underneath him. It sounded like he was talking to himself.

To Bix's surprise, Gajeel released his ruthless hold on him. He leaned back on his heels and toppled to the side, rolling to his back and covering his face with his arms. Bix scrambled up, half expecting Gajeel to find some new, even more brutal way to restrain him but instead the raven just lay there, ribcage shuttering as if his lungs couldn't quite take in the air he was breathing. Laxus steadied himself and then slowly approached, stopping at his side and accidentally kicking up the slightest bit of dust with his feet.

"Oi… you alright?"

…

"Gajeel, answer me."

"I need a minute," he forced out, pressing his palms into his eyes.

"Yeah… Bix does that to people."

"And I fell for it like a fucking idiot…"

Laxus sank down to the ground close enough to reach out and touch him though he didn't dare try, not yet anyway, "You're not an idiot, Gajeel. Bickslow is just an ass."

A sharp intake of breath told Laxus that Bix was going to defend himself Laxus shot him a piercing look, silencing whatever words were just on his tongue. Bickslow clenched his jaw, finally realizing he'd really done it this time. He could hear Freed and Evergreen approach, their steps quiet and unsure, not wanting to set off another rage-filled fit by encroaching.

"You're pretty badass, ya know that? It took ya, what, ten seconds to take down Bix? Don't think I've ever seen that before." Laxus smirked down at his tanned hands, running his gaze down to study the scars and studs on his forearms.

"It was very impressive," Freed piped up, still unsure but attempting to help.

"Thanks…" it sounded sour and his face twisted into a snarl. Laxus reached forward in an attempt to pull one of his arms out of the way and Gajeel snapped at the movement, grabbing a hold of Laxus's wrist and holding it in place. He was on high alert, his eyes holding a touch of the panic that was there the previous night.

Laxus smiled down at him gently, "Why do you always insist on covering one of my favorite parts of you?"

Red swept up Gajeel's throat at that and he gritted his teeth in an attempt to keep his embarrassment from smothering out his still potent anger, "Why do _you_ have to insist on doing that?"

"What? Complimenting you?" he whipped his wrist around to get out of Gajeel's grasp, "I told you I hate it when you say bad things about yourself. If you won't highlight the good then I will."

Gajeel rolled his eyes, finally sitting up and pulling his feet up so he could rest his forearms on his knees. He stared at his hands and his voice sounded tired, "Sorry fer comin' after ya, Bix."

"I deserved it," he said simply, punching Gajeel mildly on the shoulder, "We're even."

"Good job, Fairy, I knew you could make friends," Laxus teased and Gajeel stiffened.

"Don't call me that," he growled.

"And why not?" Evergreen interjected, getting a rise out of the three men sitting on the ground, "You're a member of Fairy Tail, aren't you?"

"That _would_ make you a Fairy," Freed agreed, a mischievous grin spreading across his face.

"And you know us Fairies," Evergreen rolled her eyes, "We're protective when it comes to our family."

"You're not alone, Gajeel," Freed added, "Everything that you're dealing with, we want to help... even if we don't know how best to do it."

"… _aaand_ you're practically part of the Raijinshuu, now, so you should probably get used to us." Bix chimed in.

"It's not you against the world anymore, love," Laxus purred gently, intertwining his fingers with Gajeel's as he spoke, "You don't have to carry things alone, that's what your friends are here for… That's what _I'm_ here for."

"Mavis' sakes…" Gajeel sniffed and made a clumsy attempt to cover it with a cough.

Bix grinned a wide, toothy smile, "Aw… the Fairies are rubbing off on you, mate."

Laxus leaned over and nuzzled into his partner's neck gently, wrapping his arm around his waist as Gajeel's scales finally dissipated. He planted a gentle kiss on his jaw just as Ever and Freed reached the two, also engulfing Gajeel in warm embraces. Even Bickslow, slowly at first and then with more sureness, leaned over and wrapped an arm around Gajeel's shoulders.

"Gods alive you guys are sappy as hell…" Gajeel muttered in their awkward group hug, meriting a chuckle from the Thunder God.

"Better get used to it, you're stuck now."

"Yeah… I guess it ain't so bad."


	50. Chapter 50

Chapter 50:

They all withdrew with Freed quickly taking up lecturing Bickslow about tact and everything he'd done wrong through the whole ordeal. Evergreen just rolled her eyes and listened as the two men bickered, offering sarcastic comments here and there. Laxus turned his eyes to the setting sun and glanced over at Gajeel, a slight nod letting him know it was time for them all to set off.

Their walk was markedly more easy going. Gajeel walked close to Laxus the entire time, though, smoking a cigarette for most of the way. At some point, Laxus reached out a hand and let it fall gently down Gajeel's spine to rest a the small of his back just a moment, a tantalizing shiver making Gajeel straighten suddenly, before Laxus let his hand glad away and back into his pocket. Gajeel shot him a stern look just as Freed started complaining about the two needing to keep their hands to themselves while they were on a mission. That didn't stop Gajeel from pointedly reaching out and grabbing Laxus's ass soon as Freed's attention was turned elsewhere.

" _Gajeel_ ," Laxus had hissed, giving him a look of mock disapproval.

"Shaddup, you liked it," Gajeel purred devilishly before flicking his cigarette butt on the ground.

It was fully night when they crested the south side of an easy hill and caught their first glimpse of the fort. It was old, very old. It loomed like an ancient stone relic in the wilderness, surrounded sparsely by withered and timeworn trees that had been haggard by wind and dust for decades. To all of their dismay, there was no perimeter, no guards posted on the walkways to keep watch for attack. Briefly, Gajeel wondered if maybe Krew and Ezal didn't mention their appearance in town. They made their approach, eyes peeled for any signs of movement or life, to the rear of the place. There was no entrance on this side, only high, crumbling stone walls. Evergreen sighed impatiently as the five of them gazed up to the top of the structure, obviously not happy with the prospect of scaling the thing.

"Well…" she said at length, "Me, Bix, and Freed can fly, what about you two?"

"Are we still working under the pretense of surprise?" Freed interjected, pulling his jacket closer as a stray wind whisked fiercely by, "If so, would it be unwise to just waltz in?"

"I can slip in," Gajeel muttered, gaining all of their attentions. He cleared his throat and added a little more modestly, "It wouldn't be hard."

Evergreen snuffed, "And what do you expect the rest of us to do? Wait?"

Gajeel shrugged, looking to Laxus as he spoke, "It was an idea."

"You can get in and get to the front gate without being seen?" Laxus asked, although he wasn't surprised with the answer.

"Yeah… should take me like… twenty minutes? Maybe? I can let you guys in and we can make our way through the place."

"Are you looking for something in particular?" Laxus prompted, trying to flesh everything out before they were stuck inside enemy territory with only one way out.

"They should have a resource room… a manned, locked place where they keep records and surveillance if they have anything set up. That's what I'm after."

"Is there a reason why we can't just bust in, take care of business first, and look for your shit later?" Bix whined, earning a silencing look from Laxus.

"Cuz if they have surveillance they'll spot us and if they're smart they'll destroy anything they got when shit starts goin' down," Gajeel replied calmly, "It's just an idea, we can do somethin' else."

Laxus mulled the option over, turning his eyes to the wall for a moment as he thought, "Alright, Delinquent, you're up."

"Less work for us, I suppose," Ever flipped her hair over her shoulder and Bix rolled his eyes. Gajeel grinned as he sashayed past Laxus.

"Try not to stare at my ass, Sparky," he simpered, purposefully running his tongue over his teeth at the blonde before turning to the obstacle in front of him. Green light flooded around him for just a moment as he summoned his Iron Scales, his nails turning to sharp talons that glittered in the dank light. He crouched down, all of the muscles in his legs becoming taunt just before he uncoiled like a spring, flying up almost half the height of the wall before digging razor-sharp nails into the stone. Sparks flickered where iron struck stone and then Gajeel was vaulting even higher, rising like a shadow up the side of the structure before disappearing at the top.

"Lewd, isn't he?" Freed simmered.

"Don't be jealous, Freed, it looks ugly on you," Laxus rumbled, trying to hide a smirk as he passed his emerald friend.

"I-I'm not jealous!" he whimpered helplessly, "I… I just think he could… be a little more… graceful?"

"You're jealous, Freed," Ever tutted, "Maybe _you_ should be a little more graceful."

"Since when were you on _his_ side?" Freed grumbled, crossing his arms.

"Anyone who will shut Bickslow up is good in my book," she grinned wickedly.

"Why am _I_ getting involved?!"

"Because you dragged us into your trouble earlier!" she hissed in return.

"Speaking of which…" Laxus growled, stopping his procession to stand almost shoulder-to-shoulder with Bickslow, "What you did was cruel, Bix."

"It helped," he stated simply.

"Just because it helped doesn't mean it was good," Laxus discharged some lightning in his direction and his friend froze, eyes darting to the ground as electrical energy swelled around them. Laxus could smell the apprehension he incited in Bickslow and it was almost sobering, "I'm going to say this once, Bix, don't fuck with Gajeel's head again."

Bickslow swallowed and nodded, "Right, yeah… sorry."

"You can see what you're doing to him, you would think you'd know better."

He could tell Bickslow wasn't sold on actually saying the words out loud but forced them anyway, "Sometimes you need to be broken down before you can rebuild."

Laxus turned away from him, not bothering to give him even the slightest bit of tolerance, "You heard me, Bix."

"Aye, sir…" his voice was wary and it satisfied Laxus for the time being, so he took the lead again this time with the three of his friends following close behind.

As they walked the premises it was hauntingly quiet, as if the whole place was holding its breath in anticipation of something. There was no movement from old arrowslits that had been carved into the walls some time in history, not a whisper of light or shadow. After a long, tensely quiet trek, Laxus could begin to make out the entrance in the dark. Tracing along the outside wall, he motioned for the rest of them to remain as silent as possible as they walked up. He could already make out a shape in the darkness, a guard, posted and lounging lazily as he watched the night.

"Looks like Gajeel didn't make it," Freed whispered, gripping the hilt of his sword, "Should I dispatch him?"

"Hang on," Laxus hushed him, still watching intently, "Give him a chance."

For one insufferably long moment they waited in silence before a shadow slipped behind the guard and tapped him on the shoulder. Just as the guard turned, he punched him square in the temple and the guy crumpled immediately. Laxus and the others rushed forward just as Gajeel gripped the guy by the collar and propped him against the wall, making him almost look as if he were sleeping.

"Brutal," Bix breathed.

"Well, you know… had to be fast," he huffed, slightly out of breath, "C'mon. I think I know where we're headed."

"You do? Already?" Ever's eyebrows raised and her voice hitched up a tone.

"He likes this kind of work," Laxus hummed as Gajeel led them in. The walkways were narrow and winding, a maze not unlike Bianca's chambers but instead of concrete they were surrounded by stone walls. Gajeel led them with confidence and every crossroad they took they were met with figures slumped in the shadows, taken down by the Iron Dragon Slayer just minutes earlier.

"Gods… remind me not to get on his bad side…" Freed muttered as they passed by an entire patrol that had been incapacitated, laying like toy soldiers on the floor of a child's bedroom.

"They didn't exactly see me comin'," Gajeel replied smoothly, stopping in front of a metal door with two deadbolts on it.

"You waitin' for an invitation?" Laxus spurred, a wry smile on his features.

"I'm listenin'," Gajeel huffed, meeting his grin, "You ain't good at being quiet, are ya, Sparky?"

"There's five of us. Trust me, it'll be fine."

Gajeel shrugged, "Aight, then."

In one swift movement he kicked in the door, sending it flying into the room. They rushed in, Laxus easily dispatching the two mages stationed there. Gajeel rolled his shoulders as he looked around, eyes straying on a row of shelves and cabinets before he trained his gaze on the screens at the back of the room. He made himself at home, the confidence and nonchalance he exuded telling Laxus that he was in his element and knew exactly what he was doing.

"What are you looking for?" Freed moved to his side as Bickslow went about propping the door back on its hinges as best he could.

"People…" he muttered, flicking through different screens as red eyes scanned, "I was never any good at this…"

"So you really were just a delinquent?" Laxus jeered at him and Gajeel shook his head, still focused fully on his task.

"I was the guy who went in… Juvia always had this job," he grumbled, "But since yer all _amateurs_ at being discrete, here we are."

"What are you even looking for?" Evergreen sighed as she leaned against the wall, waiting, "There's no one even around."

"And that doesn't bother you?" Gajeel growled, "We know two guys warned the guild that we were comin' and yet they're nowhere? No defenses? No extra guys out front?"

"You took out a lot of guys," Bickslow chirped from his station at the door.

Gajeel let a frustrated noise ease out from the back of his throat. Suddenly, he stopped just as one of the screens flickered to a white room. It was massive, more of an arena than just a room, and in black etched across the floor were angry, arching words that spelled out clearly 'Welcome Back, Kurogane'. At the farthest end of the room was a large chair and through the rough, low quality surveillance they could make out a figure sitting with their knees crossed. Gajeel stood and leaned in, narrowing his eyes to try and see past the grain.

"Well… if that's not bait I don't know what is," Freed murmured, and Laxus could hear his grip tighten on his sword.

"I'd say so," Gajeel responded coolly, "But not the best bait I've ever seen… especially if he's just tryin' ta make me mad."

"So level headed, delinquent… what _will_ get a rise out of you, then?" Laxus purred as Gajeel, seemingly satisfied with his find, slipped beneath the panel.

"Let me know when he has a knife to someone's throat… preferably someone I know," he pulled something out and resurfaced. The images shuttered for a minute before returning to their previous, albeit poor, display.

"Did… did you just take out the recording lacrima?" Freed followed him to the bookshelves as Gajeel pocketed the glittering orb.

"Yeah… now they can't record. It's just a live feed," he started picking through shelves, pulling out books of receipts and flipping through pages swiftly.

"Why is that essential? And _what_ are you looking for?"

Gajeel shot him a fierce look that rooted the emerald-haired man in place, although he didn't waiver, "Force of habit."

"That…! That is _not_ a good enough answer!"

Gajeel ignored him blatantly, still flicking through files and books, putting them back where he'd found them as if they'd never been touched. Laxus realized he wasn't haphazardly picking up different pieces, he was actually _looking_ for something.

"It might make things move a little faster if you let us help." Laxus came up to study what he was doing, trying to find a pattern.

Gajeel hesitated for a moment before he finally relented, "It's… like what Mirajane has. A book of missions that the guild has picked up or completed. It should have a register of who went… I doubt it'll have everything I'm lookin' for but it'll be something."

"Not those?" Laxus nodded to the center shelf which Gajeel had skipped entirely, clearly marked with dates.

Gajeel didn't even move his eyes, "That's a little too obvious… if ya get me,"

"Riiight…" Laxus scanned the shelves. Each binding was blank and nondescript. He honestly didn't know what to look for. The only thing that wasn't something thrown together in binding was what looked to be an encyclopedia… which was odd given the rest of the contents on the shelf. He nudged Gajeel's arm, "What about this?"

Gajeel's eyes lit up when Laxus opened it. It looked like a record, but not one that Laxus had ever seen before. Instead of rewards listed and completions, there were only Xs and dashes and what Laxus assumed should have been the client there was only a set of numbers, no address or name. Of the members who accepted the missions only first names were listed... actually, not even first names. Code names, maybe? A lot of them repeated, the same set of four in different variations over and over again at the start. Then another name was added here and there until finally Laxus came to recognize almost a dozen. As Gajeel flipped, every once in a while his eyes would linger on certain names or numbers. It was all gibberish to Laxus and Freed, who watched carefully over Gajeel's shoulder, but he seemed to know exactly what he was looking for. Finally, he stopped on a page in particular. On it were several names that Laxus recognized as well as some others that hadn't been listed on the previous pages. In total there were eleven names hastily scrawled down and all but one of them was crossed out harshly. Beside the number was an X.

"That's it?" Laxus hummed.

Gajeel brow furrowed and wordlessly he marking the page and flipping through the next few pages before returning back to study it. For a long minute he glared down at the page and Laxus could almost see his mind working, searching back through hazy, caustic memories. The more he thought, the more his face twisted into a dark scowl.

"What's wrong?"

"Krew told me they lost ten of their guys…" Gajeel's voice dripped with malice as he spoke, "There's eleven here."

"…Which means?" Evergreen prompted snappishly.

"Which means they should know who in the hell killed their guys," Gajeel bit back at her before snatching up the first sheet of paper he could find and a spare pen. Laxus's brows pulled together as Gajeel hissed to himself, "…there was _no one_ left…"

"Why don't you just rip it out?" Bix muttered, irked from where he sat holding post, "I ain't like they'll be using it anymore."

"Because someone else might be looking for this," Gajeel growled as he slipped the tome back where he found it, "And it would be more than a little suspicious if it were missing when they went to look for it."

"Ready?" Laxus prompted, stepping for the door.

"Thank the gods, I was getting bored," Bickslow groaned.

"Before we go, Gajeel," Laxus turned to his partner, startling him slightly, "How do you want to handle this?"

"I… what?" Gajeel blinked dumbly.

"You know these guys, how they act. They're clearly waiting on you to fight," he motioned back to the screen where the figure still waited, unmoving, the black words still etched across his homemade stage, "How do you want to handle this?"

He suddenly seemed nervous, looking to Evergreen, Freed, Bickslow, and then back to Laxus before sucking in a breath and making a slight shrug, "I dunno… I thought we'd just go in and whatever happens, happens."

Laxus smirked, quirking an eyebrow at him as he turned for the door, "Well you better start thinkin', delinquent, we're following your lead."

"I… yeah…" Gajeel seemed far from confident with the decision, even as Laxus stepped out of the way so he could take point. Evergreen gave Laxus a concerned look but he didn't acknowledge it, preferring instead to walk at Gajeel's flank as they edged back into the circuitous corridors. Laxus could taste frustration like bad air turning sour in his lungs, could see the agitated way Gajeel plucked through the place. Occasionally he'd clench his fist as if to ready for something around the next bend but always there was nothing there and the edge in his grip would relax. He seemed stuck in a place and time that wasn't there with the rest of them, his eyes almost glazing over certain rooms and adornments that spoke of familiarity. Laxus refrained from saying anything and the group walked in a silence so complete it was only broken by the occasional misstep or scuff of boots across the floor.

They finally came to a grander hall, larger and decorated with the massive insignia of the Phantom Risers, poorly scrawled on fabric and hanging like banners every ten feet before relinquishing to a large double door. It was plain and Laxus could clearly hear the murmur of a large group of people waiting like the audience to a play for their show to begin. Gajeel stopped, eyes trained in front of him for a minute before he let a sour, nervous laugh from the back of his throat escape.

"You good?" Laxus put a gentle hand on his shoulder and Gajeel immediately shrugged it off. He shook his head and grabbed the doors, throwing them open as if the act itself pushed whatever old fears that had surfaced far to the wayside. Immediately, the noise in the place settled and silence echoed back at the small band like a massive beast's yawning mouth engulfing them as soon as they entered the place. The lone figure was seated in a shabby throne on the far side of the stage. He stood as they stepped in, a flowing cape that was a bright shade of garnet draping across one of his arms. He wore deep navy slacks and a buttoned jacket, a mockery of military dress with golden gloves covering his forearms. Greasy, dark wine-colored locks were swept back from his face and stuck to the back of his neck and the sides of his jaw. Laxus's eyes strayed to jagged scars that disappeared beneath his high collar, several of them interlacing with each other like the marks of some deranged beast he'd somehow survived.

"Kurogane!" his voice filled the hall in the same way a toxic gas would, suffocating and sweet, "You received my invitation!"

"I did," Gajeel's voice exuded a confidence betrayed by his protective posture. No grin eased its way across his face, "I have to say I'm flattered."

"We've been waiting for you," he swept his hands out and around, motioning to the many sets of eyes watching expectantly. Boorish jeers were hollered out before a swift flick of the man's wrist ended the short tirade. His eyes flickered to the waiting audience and then back to Gajeel, "How have you been? I have to say, some of us thought you were dead."

Gajeel's lip twitched, fighting to break into a snarl as he straightened, a smug grin worming its way across his face in response, "Didn't even know fer sure if I was dead an' here you are, parading around like some cheap knock off?" he scoffed and crossed his arms before his voice took a sudden razor edge, "I know Jose taught ya ta never leave loose ends… you are from Phantom, aren't ya, Unaven?"

"Of course," his smile fell just slightly, his voice growing more and more fervent as he spoke, "but don't worry, I'm not insulted you wouldn't remember me. What hero remember every worm that crawls at their feet, after all?"

"I wasn't anyone's hero…" Gajeel growled and Unaven's eyes widened, seemingly almost elated at his words.

"But of course you were," he laughed scathingly, mockingly, and Gajeel felt he sounded just the slightest bit unhinged, "You're the _legend_. The one who never failed a mission for Jose. You were _ruthless_ and precise… you never got caught… you actually lived by his standard…" his smile suddenly fell as he glowered down at them. His hand twitched, "Achieve victory or die trying."

"A lot of nice words," Gajeel took a step forward, a shadow playing in the ruby of his eyes as he regarded his foe, "But somethin' tells me you didn't want me here just to tell me how great I was at my job."

He chuckled at that, his eyes reflecting Gajeel's same darkness back at him as his voice twisted, become far more malicious, "Hmm… yes, of course. You always are one to stay down to business, aren't you? Well then, let me start by saying I _did_ really admire you and everything you did for Phantom Lord and the Master. You were one of the best… that is to say though, Redfox, you should be dead."

Gajeel clenched his fists and Laxus stepped forward, ready to jump in if needed.

"If you didn't secure victory for Phantom Lord… you should have never returned at all… Isn't that right?"

Gajeel gritted his teeth, "I didn't return."

Unaven frowned, his lips pulled back into a snarl, "No you did one better, didn't you? You turned against us."

Gajeel quirked a brow, flashing his eyes about the arena, taking in faces as he swept his gaze across the crowd, "Judgin' by the lack of familiar faces, I'd say I wasn't the only one."

"All in due time," he growled just as red energy began to pop and sizzle around him, "I will restore Phantom back to its original glory, let me assure you, and it has no room for ghosts of its past trying to crawl back to their former places when they abandoned us at our lowest. The next generation is taking the mantle… and wasn't it your own words, Kurogane? That the weak needed to make way for the strong?"

"What are ya gettin' at, Unaven? Ya gonna try an' kill me?" Gajeel's voice sounded toxic and the air filled with boiling magical energy as Iron Scales fought to dot across his skin. Laxus stood at his side, discretely trying to hold him back, "Ya think ye have it in you?"

"Oh, I most certainly do," a cruel grin broke across his face and scarlet lightning flashed around his fists as he spoke, "In all my time at Phantom I've seen a lot of things… including you at your weakest."

"Is that so?"

Laxus hummed quietly, "He's baiting you."

"You think I don't know that?" Gajeel snapped at him, his gaze never wavering from the man in front of him.

"If he uses lightning, you'll be at a disadvantage," Freed whispered, "It'd be wiser for us to break into teams; you and Laxus handle him while the rest of us handles the guild."

"Face your formal retirement," Unaven called over them, tightening and releasing his fists as he spoke, "You and me, fight for the title of Kurogane."

"And if I refuse?" Gajeel retorted, squaring his shoulders.

He grinned, a look that was as gruesome as if congealed blood had been strung across his face, "You don't have a choice, Gajeel."

"Oh, don't I?"

"No… you don't…" he almost sounded empathetic, his tone back to its sickeningly sweet tone from when they first entered, "You see, there was a man looking for you here the other day… and something tells me, you're running from him."

"Davian…" Gajeel breathed, seething where he stood.

"I just happen to have something that he needs but for old times I wanted to give you a chance to stay out of the cage…" he leered, excited crimson light brightening his features as it snapped around him, "Only one of us is making it out alive today, Gajeel Redfox, and if you're not a coward you'll face me head on."

"Gajeel-" Laxus grabbed hold of his arm, stopping him from making a move.

"Laxus." Gajeel finally turned on him, his eyes enraged as he met his melting gold, "Don't get involved."

"I'm not stopping you," he stated harshly, subduing the lightning that made the air between them buzz as if a living thing trying to adhere them together, "I'm asking you… Is this what you want?"

"What I want?" confusion was clear across his face and his lashing anger was barely being restrained, "It doesn't matter what I want."

"It does," he said calmer, staring deeply into Gajeel's eyes as he spoke, and the latter seemed to soften just slightly, "You always have a choice."

Unaven scoffed, a harsh noise that ripped across the charged space, "I'm _waiting_."

Gajeel pulled away from him then, his eyes lingering on him for just a moment more before he leapt up to the makeshift stage. Unaven waited, unclasping his cape and flinging it to the side and revealing the rest of his crisp jacket. Gajeel eyed him steadily, taking a wide stance with clenched fists, waiting for him to make the first move.

Gajeel felt the attack before he saw it coming, electricity charged the air making the hair on his arms prickle. He swept to the side, rolling out of the way as a bolt of ruby lightning shook the platform. Just soon as his feet hit the ground, he was dodging again as without warning another bolt fell from the sky. The smell of burnt wood filled his nose as he swerved a third, this time faster, noticing the slight telegraph from his opponent. Unaven's eyes widened and his mouth set in a glower as each crippling attack missed but still Gajeel didn't make a move towards him. He danced out of the way, closer and closer to the lightning, realizing their range with each nearer and nearer miss.

Unaven realized what he was doing and with a smirk he sprang forward, engulfing his body in crimson and he hurled at breakneck speed at him. Gajeel's eyes flickered at him and he stepped back, the motion almost comical in its nonchalance. He didn't even hold up his hands in defense and Unaven rocketed past him, turning on his heel and launching towards him again. Gajeel retreated out of the way so that Unaven had to come to a stark halt at the edge of ring, his breathing hitched. He whirled around in a rage as Gajeel stood, arms crossed, looking completely unfazed.

He crooked his head to the side slightly, his eyes widened as his lips quivered as he fought to not break into a sneer, "I thought you said you were gonna kill me, Unaven? You can't even touch me."

Unaven roared as he charged again, this time letting loose both attacks in tandem. Gajeel dodged the first and rolled into his charge, aiming a solid fist for his face and hitting his mark with a resounding _slam_ that sent Unaven tumbling to the ground. He was on his feet, rushing again, this time charging the air with more electricity and sending volleys of glaring red towards the Dragon Slayer. Gajeel flashed towards the attacks so each on flew high and met Unaven fist for fist in the middle of the ring. Unaven lunged and Gajeel parried, both dodging just barely out of reach othe other man's hit as they fought for even the slightest advantage. Gajeel didn't use his iron magic, taking each blow full force on his forearms or forcing Unaven's hits to go wide. Without the aid of his Iron Scales, Gajeel couldn't cause the damage he desired on his adversary. Hits that would usually cripple were blocked, a jab for the ribs could be taken instead of Unaven being forced to defend for fear of breaking something. Still, Gajeel gritted his teeth and surged forward, never making a misstep to allow Unaven the edge.

It was a hit meant for Gajeel's face that enticed Gajeel to spin against it and draw it wide so he could take the opportunity for Unaven's sternum that caused his downfall. Unaven struck his shoulder and gripped a hold of him, drawing him close and releasing a charge of furious red into the Iron Dragon. Gajeel's scream ripped through the building as Unaven forced charge after charge into his body, a wicked smirk twisting into a deranged smile wide enough to show his teeth as he stared down at his victim.

"Laxus… Laxus we need to do something…" Freed breathed, glancing over at the blonde who watched, eyes wide as Gajeel screamed. Laxus ground his teeth and refused to respond, fighting the urge to consume the building in his own electrified wrath. He couldn't. Gajeel had told him not to interfere and he'd agreed. He could feel Bickslow, Freed, and Evergreen's stares as he simmered away in his barely restrained anger and concern.

Finally, Unaven released Gajeel. As he collapsed the crimson-haired mage whipped his leg around and kicked him in the chest, sending him sprawling onto the ground. Gajeel gasped, everything in his body shaking from the white-hot pain that had seared through him. He could feel the ache in his ribs from the kick, his throat sore from his screams of pain, and as he tried to push his hands into the ground to rise up he could taste the energy in the air before the lightning struck him again. He arched on his knees as red engulfed him, everything in his body shattering from the blinding agony encapsulating him. _Gods alive_ he knew this pain. Everything in him feared and abhorred this pain. He could feel the limits of his body begging for him to give up and be released. In the pause he felt a moments sweet relief before being whisked away again and finally he collapsed again to the ground. His body raw and in excruciating anguish for the relentless attacks. Through his delirium, he could hear a laugh filling the air when he didn't make move to rise.

"Such weakness… such disappointment…" Unaven's voice cracked as he stood over him, a wild look in his eye as Gajeel clutched at his hammering chest in an attempt to stop it from stuttering, "Look at you… you're _nothing_."

"Bickslow," Laxus hissed.

"He's in a lot of pain, Laxus," Bix returned, stepping forward, "He attacks like you."

"Fucking hell, Gajeel," he breathed. _Get up._

Unaven knelt down next to him, eyes swimming as he stared down at his imminent victory, "I used to think you were unstoppable. You put Phantom Lord on the map, helped it claw its way to the top… and now look at you. You're _pathetic_ … and no longer worth my time."

He stood, a look of finality in his gaze as he regarded his victim, "You didn't have the strength to kill your hero when you were in my shoes. I never dreamed I'd be where you stood," he chuckled, "I'm you, Kurogane, but _better_."

"Gajeel…!" Laxus surged forward just a step, he fists clenched as white lightning snapped around him, "Get up!"

Unaven's gaze cut to him, regarding him as if only just now realizing the four were there. To their surprise, his eyes filled with recognition, slowly at first before consuming his features. He stepped towards Laxus who met him with ferocity.

"…you…" he glanced from him back to Gajeel, "Is this… is this your _boyfriend_?"

Laxus narrowed his eyes and Unaven looked stunned for just a moment before a giggle bubbled from the back of his throat. He lapsed into a fit of manic laughter that shook his chest.

"You're fucking kidding me…" he laughed, clutching his stomach as if trying to contain himself, "You… you're fucking… What? Getting your ass beat by Fairy Tail wasn't enough you had to let 'em fuck ya too? Or was that the only way to get them to let your sorry ass in?"

Laxus growled, refusing to engage him. He kept his eyes locked on Gajeel whilst he lay on the ground unmoving.

Unaven's wicked smile suddenly turned to that of depravity, a betrayal of something sinister that he hadn't shown before, and it made Laxus's blood turn to ice, "A fucking animal and a faggot. I wonder what the Master would do if he knew what you are now."

"Gajeel!"

A wave of thunder shook the entire fort as red flashed. Laxus lurched forward as the scream ripped through the room and stopped at the realization that it wasn't Gajeel's. The harsh oppression of dark Iron Magic suddenly filled the air with suffocating ferocity. His eyes widened as the crimson faded and he realized Unaven wasn't standing any longer. He had crumpled, bands of iron twisting around his legs and holding them in place. To his amazement, Gajeel pushed himself up to his feet, wavering for just a moment before holding his balance. In a brutal act he tore Unaven from the ground and kneed him in the chest before slamming him bodily back to the ground. He cried out and Gajeel growled, stepping over him as if he were a piece of trash in his way. As Unaven struggled back to his feet Gajeel spat blood onto the ground, eyes wild as he watched his opponent rise.

" _Unaven_!" he simpered, exposing his sharp canines smeared with blood, " _Unaven!_ I knew… I _knew_ I'd heard your fucking voice before!"

Unaven launched a bolt of lightning at him but Gajeel rushed him, transforming his arm into an Iron Lance and drawing the searing attack only to spin around a slice up across his chest with a newly red-hot blade. Unaven staggered back, clutching his chest with wide eyes as the color of wine soaked into his jacket. Horror filled his feature as Gajeel stood at the ready.

"Do you wanna know how long I've been tryna figure you out, _Unaven_?" he hissed through his teeth, "A guy with those kinds of scars? I would recognize that in an instant if I'd worked with ye before. You didn't get those until recently, though, did ya?"

Unaven took a step back in terror as Gajeel lunged. He fired back recklessly, not aiming for Gajeel as much as just trying to stop his attack. Gajeel recalculated and threw Iron Pillars to the ground before him. Each attack struck the pillars before they could touch him and so he swung his Iron Lance with murderous intent, grazing the crimson mage's cheek as he retreated in desperation from Gajeel's ire.

"Those pesky loose ends, again, eh? I'd been lookin' real hard fer mine and here you are," he growled as the floor was overtaken by green light. Glittering armor overtook him, nails turned to razor sharp talons, and predatory eyes locked on it accustomed prey. His voice was as dark as midnight spilling from his mouth, "You said you were goin' ta kill me, Unaven, but I think you're already dead."


	51. Chapter 51

Chapter 51:

Gajeel sprang with claws extended for Unaven's throat when chaos broke out through the entire arena. A shot was fired from the crowd, knocking him to the ground as suddenly every mage in the building flooded down from where they'd been waiting. Laxus didn't even have to signal the Raijinshuu. They sprang into action of their own volition, leaping into the fray and tearing into any enemy mage that dare got close. Freed drew his blade and charged, Dark Ecriture taking over his eye as he volleyed words of pain and incapacitation at the dark mages. Evergreen laughed haughtily as men and women alike were rushing for cover beneath her relentless barrages. Bickslow's babies took flight, firing rays down as their master cackled at fruitless attempts to stop him. Laxus rolled his shoulders and finally released the swell of magic that had settled in his chest for so long. Screams echoed around him as the shattering brilliance of white lighting filled the hall with deafening thunder that outmatched anything Unaven had previously wrought. Bodies blurred around him, shadows of movement attempting to come close but always splintering in the wake of his devastating strength. Laxus didn't waste his time on the fodder around him, didn't give them the indulgence of noticing or caring about their jeers and calls. His eyes were locked on Gajeel as he rose like a wraith from Hell, dashing towards his retreating foe with murder in his eyes and blood on his lips. Unaven was covered in crimson, flashing like a bullet towards a flight of stairs in a desperate attempt to escape the bloodthirsty man after him.

Laxus rushed forward, trying to reach them as best he could. He was so caught up in his advance that he didn't notice the beast of a mage that blindsided him, sending searing blue flames into his back and forcing him to stumble. He whirled on him and in a blink called a bolt of lightning so fierce and strong it took out anything within a twenty-foot radius. Searing sparks flitted into the air as the stage finally caught fire from the furious abuse it had sustained at both his and Unaven's hands. Men yelled as smoke began filling the air. Bodies scattered. Laxus turned his back to them all and continued his pursuit, dodging ice and water as people rushed to extinguish flames and somehow stop his comrades from overtaking the guild.

He reached the steps, taking them two at a time as he tried to catch up. He passed deep gashes in wooden walls. A man lay in his path, hands clutching at the side of his face as blood seeped between his fingers. The ceiling was singed as he rounded a corner. Mages scattered from him, eyes filled with horror at the raw power he exuded. He could hear Unaven screaming as he rounded the last bend and Gajeel's Iron Dragon's Roar ripped through the building. Everything shook as Laxus stumbled into the hall and he caught himself on a wall as wood and dust tumbled around him. The ancient building groaned above and below, threatening to buckle under the stress of Gajeel's attack.

"You weren't like the rest of us!" the sound of wood splintering echoed above Laxus and he cast his eyes about, trying to find another set of stairs and coming up short, "You had a home! You had a choice!"

There was a crash and an iron pillar smashed through the ceiling. Feet scrambled against the roof, desperately trying to escape. Laxus noticed a set of doors and rushed for it, finding himself standing on a mezzanine above the arena. He glanced down, steeling himself against the drop in his stomach at the height. The Phantom Risers were floundering against the unstoppable force that was the Raijinshuu. The stage still smoldered angrily as mages ran for escape that was always cut off.

"Laxus!" Freed's voice called from below and he looked to see him pointing up. He gripped the edge and leaned forward, craning his neck to find yet another balcony above. He gritted his teeth and clutched hold of the railing, pulling himself up to stand and jump to the next level. Red flooded Laxus's vision and he dodged out of the way of a stray bolt Unaven had fired recklessly as he tried to flee from his relentless shadow. Gajeel lunged, gripped him by his throat and slammed him into the wall. He gasped, clinging to iron fists that threatened to throttle him. Blood dribbled down Unaven's face, slipped from the gash in his cheek and fresh slices on his arms. Brown eyes filled with contempt and dread as he fought for his life.

"Is that all you remember?" he choked through despairing wheezes as electricity swelled around them, "Where I came from? Who I _was_?"

He consumed them in a haze of red lightning. A solid kick to Gajeel's gut made his grip slip just enough for him to wring himself free. He slammed his shoulder to the fresh bruise and they both fell. As Gajeel hit the ground another wave of lighting struck. He gritted his teeth through it, refused to show the pain that was turning his veins to fire. He dodged another attack, rolled to his feet and threw another pillar to attract Unaven's next assault.

"You don't remember what you did to me?!"

Gajeel punched him, sending him sprawling to the ground. Laxus startled as Gajeel stumbled, his eyes wide as he clutched at his side. Unaven pushed himself to his knees, his breathing tattered as scarlet dripped from his mouth and miniscule droplets splattered to the ground.

"I didn't do _shit_ to you…" Gajeel seethed, his chest rattling as he fought to remain steady.

"You didn't?!"

"I SAVED YOUR LIFE!" Gajeel roared.

"YOU _RUINED_ MY LIFE!" he screeched, throwing his body forward and erupting into a missile aimed for Gajeel's chest. They collided and Gajeel screamed as he was engulfed again. Unaven was over him, fighting to control his arms so he could no longer hit him with his unrelenting fists.

"What would you have had me do?! Leave you there to die?!" Gajeel growled, ripping Unaven's hands away and backhanding him. He forced his elbows into the ground and kicked up his knees, slamming into Unaven's stomach and sending him flying head-over-heels as they tumbled together, crashing into the banister and clattering to the ground again. Gajeel pulled himself up to lean against the railing as Unaven gasped for the breath that had been knocked out of him, the pain too much for him to try and stand again, "You were surrounded! Those fuckers from the Southern Wolves would have killed you if I hadn't gotten there!"

"You took my target! Jose punished _me_ for failing the mission you stole from me!" he forced himself to shaky feet, his eyes wild as his energy snapped and surged around him again, "You. Had. _Everything_. It was _me_ who should have been at Jose's right hand not you! I gave my heart and soul to Phantom Lord! I _slaved_ for this guild, for the Master's favor! You didn't sacrifice _anything_!"

"Why would I sacrifice myself for a guild that gave me nothing?!" Gajeel snarled back, advancing towards Unaven with savagery in his eyes, "You think Jose cared about me?! You think he cared about anyone?! That bastard only cared about himself and the first chance he got he landed everything on Aria!"

Unaven's eyes widened, his eyelid twitched and he suddenly went still, "You… you take that back…!"

"Are you fucking _serious_?" Gajeel sneered, scales glittering menacingly as he approached him, "Did you honestly think for one second we weren't just fucking pawns in his power scheme? Newsflash, Unaven, that fucking coward didn't give a shit about us! As soon as we weren't worth his time he dumped us like fucking trash!"

"Shut up! You don't know anything!" Unaven's voice quavered and he clenched and unclenched his fist. His pupils dilated and he gnashed his teeth. Gajeel could tell he was spiraling, reaching desperately for something to come back at him with, "Jose wanted what was best for us! That was why he demanded perfection! He knew we could be better!"

"Why do you think he ordered me to take out Hajime?!" Gajeel raged and Unaven flinched back as Gajeel stood over him, glowering down at him as his body shook from rage, "Thirty. Years. Unaven! Hajime dumped his life into that Hellpit! All he wanted was to retire and live a quiet life! Our great _Master_ ordered me to kill the man that stood by him when Phatom was nothing! You think for two seconds I wasn't next?! Or Juvia?! Or _you_?! There's a million things in this fucking life worth dyin' for, Unaven, and Phantom Lord isn't one!"

"You bastard! I'll fuckING KILL YOU!" he shouted, lurching forward and filling everything with red. Laxus was blinded as Gajeel's scream was overtaken by wave after wave of thunder. The building trembled. Lightning surged, splitting the roof as beams fell from the ceiling. The smell of smoke consumed the atmosphere as the old building woodwork caught fire. The bite of electricity zipped up Laxus's arms and through his torso as he tried to cover his face from the sudden onslaught. When it finally subsided, smoke made it almost impossible to see. A feverish laugh bubbled from the swirling smog, broke in pitch as the last of Unaven's rationality finally fell pieces. He was babbling hysterically and Laxus felt his heart drop into his stomach as he stepped forward and felt the floor threatening to give way beneath his feet.

"Gajeel!" he called and held his breath.

There was no response.

"Do you… heh… do you have any-any idea how long I've thought of this…" Unaven's voice shivered quietly and as the dust finally started to settle Laxus thought he could make out his form in the midst of the smoke, "When I ha! When I found out it was you, you! Of all people fucking heh in that fucking cell… I couldn't _help_ it. Hearing you _scream_ was heh heh… it was too much…"

Laxus could barely breathe with the amount of smoke filling the space. He pulled his shirt over his nose and slunk carefully across the gallery. The place sounded like it was in agony from the flames, groaning and crackling from the small fires dotting the dry, old wood floors. This place wasn't going to hold for long. It was only a matter of time before it fell to pieces beneath their feet.

"The things I-the things I wanted to do… You were going to _suffer_ just like I did. You stole that chance from me but killing you? Killing you will work just fine." he stepped forward and froze. He was shaking uncontrollably, his voice feverish, the power and control he'd had before completely lost from him as he whipped his head around frantically, his eyes not finding the mangled body he was looking for. A shadow loomed in the fuming atmosphere behind him, grabbed him by the throat and dragged him screaming back into the mist. Laxus cursed and rushed forward, pushing past the horrified quiver in his heart as he danced through fire to find the two.

"You psycho motherfucker… you depraved, perverted piece of shit…!" there was a slam and Unaven cried out, anguish cut off into gurgles as he fought to breathe. Laxus could hear Gajeel's grip tighten, Unaven's choking and gagging beneath the crushing force of iron hands. Laxus scrambled across the uneven floor and smashed through burning pieces of furniture until he could begin to make out shapes in the haze. Gajeel's voice dropped and became no more than a guttural, wretched sound falling from his lips, "Why… why in the hell do you sound like me?"

For an excruciatingly long moment, Gajeel's grasp held with cold ferocity before finally his fingers loosed their hold and Unaven dropped to the floor. He fell to his knees gasping for air at Gajeel's feet and Laxus slowed his pursuit, worry etched across his face as he looked on. Through the smoke he could see him, blood smeared across his face with red sparks flickering around him as he stared in dismay at the Dragon Slayer towering above him. There was a distant look in Gajeel's eyes as he gazed down at him, looking past Unaven as if he weren't even there. He let out a brief laugh and it was so bitter and mournful that Laxus felt it ball into his chest; a heavy thing that spoke of a revelation Gajeel didn't quite want to face but found he had no choice but to.

His eyes glittered like rubies from the fire as he stared down at his foe, his voice strangely steady, "I know what it's like to hate someone so much it eats a fucking hole in your chest. Let me tell ya, Unaven… killing me, me killing you, it won't be enough to satisfy it."

Unaven's face twisted into a wry, panicked smile, "Hah… wh-what?"

Gajeel's red eyes blazed quietly down at him, "I'm done."

"You… heh… you can't be _done_!"

"It's over, Unaven," Gajeel murmured, stepping back from him as if he were some venomous snake at his feet, "I'm fucking tired… I'm tired of being angry and cold. I'm tired of pushing away important things over a stupid fucking need to _end_ this. The bloodshed, the nightmares, it's not worth it… and I'm through with you."

"No… no no _no_! _You don't get to decide when it's over_!" Unaven raged, his voice thoroughly lacking any restraint and reason. He was imploding, his eyes wide with rage and horror and he jolted to his feet only for Gajeel to slam him back to the wall. He writhed in his grasp but Gajeel didn't waver. He forced iron brackets through the oak of the wall, restrained Unaven so he couldn't get free. Emerald sparks flew as iron twisted around his calves, thighs, chest and throat. He thrashed but he couldn't break even the slightest bit free. The iron was unyielding and secure and when Gajeel stepped back he lacked all the mad hatred he'd held onto through their entire fight. Instead he just looked disgusted and miserable as Unaven cursed and swore and threatened, "You can't _do_ this! You fucking coward! You weak bastard! If you have any balls you'd just fucking kill me!"

Gajeel clenched his jaw and forced himself to step back as red lighting surged and shocked its master, tracing through the metal cage Gajeel had trapped him in. Laxus gritted his teeth as Unaven thrashed and screamed. He was trapped in his helplessness, unable to escape or attack, and in his madness he howled like some sort of wild beast. Despite everything they'd seen, everything Gajeel had been put through at Unaven's hands, Laxus's heart hurt for the man. He knew the pain in his eyes as seen the same in Gajeel. This for Unaven wasn't just the loss of a battle against his once-hero, this was a loss against everything he'd clung to; his last saving grace and will to exist was slipping through his fingers like sand with nothing to fill the space except a black void of desolation and shadow. As Gajeel regarded the madman before him, he could see some deep connection that neither could possibly begin admit out loud. One clung frantically to the past with every fiber of their being and the other was fighting to leave it behind. They were the same person, after all, just trapped in two very different places.

Ruby eyes turned slowly to Laxus, quiet fear and anguish meshing together as the place groaned about them. Laxus pushed his hands into his pockets and did his best to settle to the lightning still slithering around him, slim tongues of vibrant yellow splitting the deep shadows steeped in crimson.

"Ready to go, delinquent?"

"Yeah… I am," his voice wavered just slightly and Unaven screeched.

"Spineless pussy! You're _nothing_ you disgusting fag! You're not half the man you used to be! You're a disgrace against Phantom and everything we stood for!"

"It's a shame the bastard doesn't fight as well as he throws insults," Laxus growled, sending his lightning threateningly close to the iron bars holding Unaven, silencing him with the promise of pain far greater than what he could have beset upon himself, "But then, Phantom Lord mages always were more of a show than actually any good in a fight."

Unaven looked disgusted and he derided Laxus with manic eyes, "You don't know shit! Phantom Lord almost destroyed you! If Kurgoane had been half the mage-"

"His name isn't Kurgane," Laxus's voice was steady and passionate, and he silenced Unaven with another easy caress of his lightning just centimeters from the fresh gash on his face, "It's Gajeel Redfox. And he's a far better mage than you could ever dream of becoming. But you? Well… you just don't have it in you."

Laxus turned his attention to Gajeel whose eyes were wide with stricken wonder and a minute smile played at the corners of his lips. Laxus nodded in the direction of the exit and Gajeel followed wordlessly and he could have sworn the air between them was humming as they picked their way through the cracked floors and splintered wood. Laxus felt like he'd just let out a long-held breath when they'd rounded the corner and Gajeel was close enough for him to reach for him. He grabbed a hold of his wrist and pulled him close, wrapping his arms around the raven as if he was scared he'd disappear if he wasn't holding him tight enough.

"That was incredibly fucking stupid," Laxus growled in his ear. Everything he'd kept back suddenly swelled beyond what he could control and against his best efforts yellow strings of lightning danced in the air around them. He felt Gajeel flinch amidst his embrace and he reigned himself back as much as he could.

"Yeah… yeah I'm sorry,"

Laxus clenched his jaw, "I actually thought you were down for a minute… ya had me worried."

Gajeel grinned and despite it being forced it abated Laxus's worry slightly, "Geehee, compared to you dish out that was like gettin' shocked from a fuckin' doorknob."

A loud bang echoed through the place that made both men jump. Another bang and there was yelling from the bottom floor. Laxus led the way down the first flight of stairs and came to the lower balcony. The grand doors had been kicked in and wood was almost completely wrenched from hinges as men wearing white uniforms flooded in and mages began to scatter. Evergreen, Bickslow and Freed rushed to where Gajeel and Laxus stood.

"Custody Enforcement! Nobody move!"

"Shit!" Bickslow swore, "What do we do now?!"

"Custody Enforcement! You're all under arrest!"

Gajeel ducked back from the edge, drawing the eyes of his companions and he gave them a dubious look, "You guys have never run from Enforcement."

"Of course not!" Freed hissed, "We're not criminals like _some_ people!"

" _Ex_ -criminal," Gajeel snapped back at him.

"Now is _not_ the time!" Evergreen smacked Freed with her fan before addressing the Iron Dragon Slayer, "Laxus appointed you leader, _lead_."

Gajeel's eyes widened and he turned his gaze to Laxus who just smirked and shrugged. Gajeel clicked his teeth.

"Crash course, then," he growled, "No magic, we're going on foot."

"WHAT?!" Freed blanched, "You expect us to _run_?! For how long?!"

The sound of boots hitting the stairs made Gajeel flinch. He took another step back, his heartrate jumping in preparation for their flight.

"As long as we have to!" Gajeel hissed, "If they can see it, they can track us, and if they figure out the type of magic you use they'll find you. The only thing we got goin' for us right now is it's dark. Bix, take yer mask off or you won't be able to see."

"Aye sir," he grinned.

There was a flutter of a white cape, "Custody Enforcement!"

"Shit! This way!" Gajeel took off, hearing the clatter of Laxus and the rest of the Raijinshuu as they followed. They rocketed towards the other side of the balcony and Gajeel wrenched open the nearest door and ran in the direction of his and Unaven's fight just moments before. Very quickly he found the aftermath of his Iron Dragon's Roar. A gaping hole in the side of the building led to the frozen night and without hesitation he leapt from the four-story drop and landed solidly on the stone wall that encircled the fort. When he hit the ground he rolled, taking the brunt of the fall on his shoulder and faltering at the pain that lanced through his ribs from the harsh jar. Back on his feet, he turned and watched as Bickslow immediately followed, his babies giggling as they whisked by him. When Evergreen jumped, her wings fanned daintily out from her sides and she flitted above them, laughing haughtily the entire time.

"Bix!" he jerked his head towards Freed and Laxus who stopped just at the drop. Gajeel rushed for the edge and Bickslow grabbed his hand, holding him steady as he reached for the two, "Come on! We ain't got time!"

Laxus set his jaw, took a couple steps back and took the fall. Gajeel lunged for him, gripping on to his arm and pulling him down to the wall. He huffed as he landed but hid his trepidation well enough that Gajeel didn't bother him about it. He reached for Freed who promptly ignored him, almost missing his footing as he landed, but saving face enough to flip his green locks in Gajeel's direction as he passed. Gajeel rolled his eyes.

"Stop where you are! Enforcement!"

"Damn, they're quick," Bickslow gasped as two more officers came up behind him.

"You have no idea," Gajeel growled, taking his position back in the lead as he conjured his scales just enough to cover his hands and arms. He dug his talons into the stone and slid down the wall, stopping halfway and beckoning for Bickslow to jump. He caught him and let him drop the shorter distance down, then Freed, and finally Laxus, gritting his teeth as each one caused a sharp pain to flash through his chest. When he dropped he broke into a full sprint, tackling the distance between each of them as if he were racing children. His lungs were burning as he pressed on into the night, his eyes focused on the hills where they'd come from earlier. He knew if he could get them to the far side of the hills they'd be in desert canyons and could lose Enforcement in the maze-like terrain.

A whirr of magic rushed by him and hit the ground a few feet in front of him, causing him to leap to the side to avoid being hit. He tripped, cried out as pain ripped through his chest from the fall, and forced himself back to his feet just as Bickslow rushed by him. Another shot hit closer and he was sprinting again, eyes darting frantically behind him to ensure Freed and Laxus were still close at his heels.

"Evergreen!" he wheezed, grabbing her attention as she swooped overhead, "Freed? Laxus?"

"They're fine," she narrowed her eyes at him, "Are you?"

He brushed her off, charging forward and overcoming the first hill. His legs were sore and weak and his lungs were screaming. Each deep breath of air made his chest burn but he had to keep going. In the haze of pain he focused on a point on the horizon and as he crested the last hill he spotted the direction they needed to go. He surpassed Bickslow again, grabbing his attention and directing him towards the canyon. His maroon eyes sparkled wildly as they slid to a stop at the edge, Gajeel gasping for air as they waited for Laxus and Freed to catch up. Just as they came into view, Gajeel spotted two blurs of white quick at their heels and he cursed.

"What's wrong?" Bickslow huffed, following his gaze.

"We need more time,"

"On it," he grinned and with a flick of his wrist his totems whirled past, heading for the officers and slamming into them, knocking them down to roll in the dust.

"Great… get a running start,"

"What?"

"We're gonna jump," Gajeel pointed to the rock formation jutting up into the center of the ravine. They dotted the chasm like islands in a massive river leading to the other side. Bickslow's eyes widened.

"I can't make that."

"Ya can if I help ya, now hurry up!" Gajeel growled and Bickslow set his jaw, pacing back and launching forward. Just as Bix jumped, Gajeel placed a hand in the center of his back and pushed him with as much force as he could muster. He whooped as he sailed and landed hard on the rock, crashing to the ground before pushing himself back up again, incredulous to the fact he'd actually made it. Gajeel turned and made eye contact with Freed, telling him to do the same and was surprised to see Freed set his jaw and not slow. Again, Gajeel propelled him across and Bickslow caught him as he made the landing.

"C'mon Sparky! You're slow as hell!" Gajeel jeered and Laxus huffed, taking the leap with more grace than the other two despite the tightness around his eyes. Gajeel took a steadying breath as he gaged the distance. Shaking the doubt from his mind the best he could, he retreated back as far as he dared before tearing forward. Both feet landed on the edge and he put as much power into the jump as he could. He gritted his teeth as his eyes focused on his trajectory. The deep browns of the rock face rose too quickly for him to make it and he just caught sight of a pair of golden eyes before a hand grabbed hold of his forearm. He collided with the rock and let out a yelp as pain rent open his chest, far more ferociously than before, and Laxus hauled him up to safety.

"Shit… you ok?" Laxus breathed as Gajeel gripped at his side, not sure if it was pain that was making his mouth taste like iron or blood.

"Fine… I'm fine. We gotta keep movin'," he took a shaky breath and pushed himself back to his feet, ignoring concerned looks as he took the jump to the next platform, and then the next, leading their way across the ravine. He could hear the shouts of the Enforcement unit as they tried to find a way across. Evergreen yelled for them across the embankment and he skidded to a halt. Their last jump was far too wide for them to make. He cursed as Freed, Bickslow, and Laxus came up behind him, casting a glance back to where they came and seeing no alternative route. The stark white of uniform was desperately trying to catch up, tracking them as best they could through the hazardous obstacle course. Gajeel's mind whirled.

"Bix… how much weight can your babies carry?" he huffed, pacing back and forth across the ledge like a caged tiger.

"Eh… it takes all of 'em to carry me,"

"What about hopping across them one at a time?" Freed panted, "It'll take me too long to make a bridge with runes…"

"Babies!"

Bickslow's totems swooped overhead, evenly spacing the distance between the five of them. Bix took little hesitation as he jumped, each totem dodging downward with his weight as he quickly leapt from spirit to spirit, not allowing them enough time to fail beneath him. Freed gripped the hilt of his blade and followed in similar fashion, although being the lightest of the men they bobbled slightly less under his stress. Laxus shot a concerned look to Gajeel and followed, barely containing the thunderous energy that swelled with his anxiety as he swiftly made the jumps. Gajeel steeled himself, backed up a few paces, and pushed down the pain that threatened his resolve. Like a bow drawn to taut, he launched with speed and precision. Half way across he felt something whizz by his ear, almost knocking him off balance as a white blast hit the ledge before him. His eyes widened as he felt the energy before he could do anything to save himself. Mid-jump, searing heat slammed into his spine and he tumbled, fingers splayed as he reached for the next totem, unable to make it.

He covered himself in his iron scales just as the dull thud of Bickslow's totems slammed into his side, sending him careening into the rock face. He dug his claws into the hard, gritted his teeth as sparks ricocheted off his face as he continued to slip. His foot hit something and he stopped sliding but the agony in his ribs filled his vision with red as he clung to the side of the wall, arms and legs shaking. He could hear muffled noises, shouts for his attention but he couldn't tell if they were friend or Enforcement. His hands lost their grip and he slid again, growling in frustration as his arms refused to obey him, whether from pain, weakness, or from the strain of Unaven's electrical charges. The nervous chatter of something by his ear made him force his eyes open to see two totems flying at his side, chittering away at him frantically though his mind was having problems processing what they were saying.

"Look up! Look up!"

"Up! Up! Up!"

He winced, pulling his eyes up to see Laxus and Bickslow staring down at him, golden eyes wide with worry and maroon eyes that quickly turned brilliant green as he met Gajeel's gaze. A triumphant smile pulled across Bix's lips and for the first time it didn't enrage the Dragon Slayer to see that frenzied look. His control slipped from him as Bickslow forced him to climb clumsily up the wall, claws leaving deep gashed into stone as he made his way. Laxus grabbed his arms and tunic, hauling him up the rest of the way, frenzied murmurs bouncing through Gajeel's mind but not ever translating as Bix's hold finally broke. He glanced over his shoulder as Enforcement Officers stood in dismay, six of them he noticed, talking and raging and calling out at the group that made it to the other side.

Gajeel pushed himself up, stumbled and clutched his side. Hands gripped a hold of him as he rose and he shook them off, "C'mon. We ain't done yet."

"You need rest," Laxus stated firmly, eyes blazing as they took him in.

Gajeel had enough time to smirk when the sounds of a magic circle got their collective attentions. Freed's eyes widened, "They're making a bridge!"

"Shit…" Gajeel breathed, refusing to acknowledge the rattle in his lungs, "…time… anyone know the time?"

Four pairs of eyes at him in disbelief. It didn't matter, Gajeel caught the sound on the wind and he smirked. He pushed past them and took off again, nodding his head in a wordless motion for them to follow. Evergreen took after him, Freed and Bix close on his heels as Laxus took up the rear. He ignored the pain that each gulp of air forced through his body, almost feeling dizzy from it as he pressed on. He heard the whistle again and for the first time in his life almost _rejoiced_ at the sound of a goddamn train. They slipped up the steep of gravel, climbing atop one last bluff before coming to a sheer drop down to another ravine. Iron tracks glistened in the night and Gajeel turned his head to see the blessed sight of steam puffing in the distance.

"Great… how do we get down?" Freed huffed at his side and Gajeel's mind was shifting through the best vague ideas he could come up with, but it was clear he wasn't function right. He was exhausted and in pain, all the adrenaline pushing him was gone and _Godsalive_ he felt like the air was getting thicker, harder to breathe as if he were taking in smoke. He desperately needed to rest and eat…

"I can't…" Gajeel panted, dropping to sit down for just a moment, "Ah, shit. I can't drop you guys down. It hurts too much… besides… I'm almost spent."

"We can't scale it in time," Evergreen mused, glancing back over her shoulder to the Officers still conjuring a bridge. Laxus knelt down beside him, reaching to smooth a hand across his chest only to have Gajeel push it away, _later_. He gave him a look but didn't press, noticing the way Gajeel's brow creased as he looked past him.

"Think we can make that?" he pointed at a gravel slope in the distance, just a short run, but with the train fast approaching it was hit or miss.

"Enforcement!" the sound of fast approaching footsteps forced their hand, "Stop!"

"Can _you_?" Laxus growled pointedly and Gajeel pushed himself up, ignoring the remark completely. They made a break for it, Gajeel leading the way as they rocketed for their last hope at freedom. Evergreen flew with Bickslow's totems to the slope, taking post to help if one of them should fall. As soon as Gajeel's feet hit gravel he braced himself and skid, rolling with rocks at an alarming rate down. He gritted his teeth, clutching at his side for fear of pain that would greet him should his balance waver and he hit the ground. The train rushed by as he sprinted, sounding its horn into the night so that it bounced off of the tall cliffs around them. He pushed the last of his energy into the jump that would finally land him to safety but he didn't stick the landing like he would have hoped. The wind left his lungs as he slammed onto the roof and damn him if he didn't cry out with tears stinging his eyes at the suffering his chest was forced to endure. He was driving himself to his feet when he felt Freed, Bickslow, and Laxus land.

Without thinking, he slid himself over the edge and caught himself on the side of the train. Wind whipped his hair across his face as he slammed his foot into the side of the door, wrenching the chains from where they held the massive doors shut. They groaned and slid open and he hollered up for his companions who peered down at him in dismay. One by one he got them inside, grabbing the heavy chains and throwing himself in after them. It took help from Laxus to shut the weighty thing and he was disappointed to find the chains were aluminum instead of iron. Finally, he let the pain have its way with him. He tromped across the space, pressed his back to the freezing aluminum wall and slowly slid to the ground, gripping his side as if it would somehow hold him together.

"Good job guys," he huffed, not truly meeting anyone's gaze as he gulped for breath from the soreness slowly dumbing his senses, "That was fun. We should do that again sometime."

"You look hellish," Freed derided harshly and Bickslow punched him on the arm.

"You don't quit, do ya, Gajeel?" Bickslow walked over to sit at his side, his babies still twittering with excitement around him, "No wonder they called ya Black Steel."

The sound of metal clanging and the scent of iron had Gajeel's stomach turning more than it should have if he were well. He was trying to save face and keep himself cool when Laxus was suddenly at his side, dropping iron railroad spikes heavily to the ground at his feet and he was ashamed to have to admit his motion sickness was already taking root in the base of his gut. There was no way he'd be eating anytime soon, which really was the worst. Healing would happen a lot slower without it. An agitated rocking made his stomach lurch and he didn't have it in him to stop Laxus's prying fingers from pushing up his shirt to reveal flesh that was already bruising. Massive splotches of purple and navy flowered across his torso from sustained abuse and despite how he tried not to he couldn't stop the snarl from working passed his gritted teeth. Evergreen lowered her glasses enough to stare at him critically over the top of them.

"I should numb this," Laxus's voice thrummed like a heartbeat beside him and Gajeel seriously started wondering if he was becoming delirious, "It's probably broken."

"Hah… no," Gajeel scooted away just slightly but Laxus clamped his hand on his thigh, impeding his movement, "This ain't shit, Sparky, I've been through worse."

"I'm not going to hurt you, Gajeel, calm down," the air charged and Gajeel lurched away again, panic written clearly across his face.

"I've been shocked enough today, _thanks_ ," he hissed, attempting to get away again just as his stomach tilted and his body gurgled angrily at him. Did he even have anything in his stomach to get rid of? He had a sinking suspicion he was about to find out.

"Hold still."

"No. _No_." Gajeel attempted to turn but pain ripped through him, leaving him breathless, and before he could move again Laxus's massive hands were on his bare skin, "Gods' sakes, Laxus…"

He felt the shock jitter throughout his entire body. His spine snapped straight despite his wishes and for the life of him he was pretty sure his eyes rolled back into his head as the electricity fried his nerves. It didn't _hurt_ per se, but it was far from comfortable and that was the last push that his body needed. He bolted for the farthest corner away from the others and wretched so hard he saw stars. His legs felt like rubber and despite the lack of pain he was absolutely spent. He teetered back and collapsed, blacking out right there on the floor with the entirety of Raijinshuu staring, dumbfounded.

"…I guess he does quit, after all." Bix quipped timorously.

Laxus rolled his eyes.


	52. Chapter 52

Chapter 52:

White soldiers flooded the old fort, half collapsing and half on fire. He moved like mist through the halls, fully aware of what he was looking for. As his officers were busy rounding up unconscious men and making their way through the labyrinth Unaven had hastily put together, he stepped easily. The door in question, he noticed, barely sat on twisted hinges clattered to the ground at the slightest touch. He narrowed his eyes as he stepped through the threshold.

Someone had already been here.

He stood in the middle of the room, eyes sweeping over monitors that displayed empty rooms and dark halls. Every so often he caught a flash of white as his men moved like ghosts through the place. He scrunched his nose at one monitor in particular. Mages were swarming across an arena; three figures were taking out a horde of wizards baring the Phantom Riser's insignia. Between shifting bodies, he could just barely make out words. _Welcome Back, Kurogane._ His fears abaited slightly.

How useful.

He reached for the controls, flipping through different channels until a flash of motion caught his eyes. The building rocked and he tossed his head back, watching as dust filtered from the ceiling and cracks spidered across the walls. Turning eyes back to the screen he saw a dark figure strangling another, throwing him against a wall before falling back into the fight. He couldn't help it, he grinned. Two men fighting for their lives… it was _passionate_ and caused something like anticipation to coil in the pit of his spine.

"Lieutenant Bishop," the words dragged him back down, "We're ready to advance."

"Please do," the lieutenant responded coldly, never glancing back at his subordinate. He heard footsteps recede and reached under the panel, fingers trying for the device he knew should be there. He furrowed his brow, anger spiking in his chest.

The lacrima was gone?

His plan unraveled and he clenched his fists, scowling as he glanced under the panel. It wasn't just _gone_ , nothing else was touched. Someone knew exactly what they needed to do to keep from being caught. Someone who was trained by Phantom Lord to not miss small details.

"Kurogane…" he growled under his breath, rising slowly and casting his eyes about once to see if anything else was amiss. He rested his gaze on the bookcase, "What were you after?"

He stepped to it, eyes picking at spines. Nothing was amiss yet he could _smell_ the man had been here. He glanced at the door, watching to make sure no one was there to disturb him, and without looking away he flicked out a long black tongue. An explosion of information shifted his focus when he rubbed his tongue against the top of his mouth. Eyes slanted to each book the man had touched before landing on one that stood out from the others. A dictionary, maybe? The man was certainly lacking enough in vocabulary to need one, relying more on four letter words than anything of actual wit.

He narrowed his eyes.

He slipped it from the shelf and immediately recognized what it was, "Out for revenge are we?" he breathed as the pages fell to the last place that was left open. He arched a brow and glanced back at the screen. _Unaven_.

"…Exciting…" his black tongue lashed against his sharp teeth.

He slipped through halls soundlessly. Mage's and officers alike rushed past him as if he were no more than a shadow, and truly he could have been. Like a wisp of smoke he made his way up the stories to a balcony alight with red lightning and orange fire. Venomous words slithered through the heavy atmosphere and as he approached two figures in the smog he stopped, eyes wide as the dark shadow of his target loomed over Unaven's broken body. His pulse quickened in his chest.

"…I'm through with you."

"No… no no _no_! _You don't get to decide when it's over_!"

Unaven was _insane_. He lunged like an animal after Kurogane's throat and Davian clenched his fists, ready to spring forward if the need arose. But the raven was indeed a trained fighter, gripping Unaven with those deft, unrelenting, and utterly _violent_ hands and forcing him back into submission. Green lit the room, threatening to blow his cover and he recoiled into the smoke to remain hidden.

"You can't _do_ this! You fucking coward! You weak bastard! If you have any balls you'd just fucking kill me!"

For just a moment, a breath, there was a hint at desire in those bloody eyes before it was immediately drowned in the vibrant red rage of Unaven's lightning and screams. A shadow moved just to his left and he stiffened as a blonde beast of a man stepped forward towards the raven. Davian narrowed his eyes at Laxus, an almost pained expression on his face as he looked on. Yellow sparks flared from his fists and it amazed him that the man didn't seem to notice. How much raw energy did one need to not even realize when it was being utilized? Or maybe he was just too moved emotionally to care. Either way, he marveled at the heir to the Dreyar legacy. What a formidable man… a man he needed to do more research on.

"Ready to go, delinquent?"

Delinquent? He almost scoffed.

"Yeah… I am,"

"Spineless pussy! You're _nothing_ you disgusting fag! You're not half the man you used to be! You're a disgrace against Phantom and everything we stood for!"

"It's a shame the bastard doesn't fight as well as he throws insults," Laxus growled, and it was a _threat_ , enough so that Davian was sure the stoutest man would be silenced by that kind of power, "But then, Phantom Lord mages always were more of a show than actually any good in a fight."

The sound of feet distracted him and he stepped back into the stairwell. He moved swiftly down, catching his underlings as they made their way up to the third story.

"Sir," they stopped as they regarded him. Cadet Serrill was the battalion leader and like the good soldier he was he awaited Davian's orders before proceeding.

"I think you may find the grand entrance to be a good place to start," he hummed and the man immediately turned, leading his division back the direction they came. Davian waited a few heartbeats before ascending again, this time sure he would be alone.

He was uncharacteristically smug as he moved towards Unaven's trapped and defeated figure. He wasn't surprised in the slightest when the man startled at his presence, never for a moment realizing he was approaching until he was right in front of the man. Brown eyes danced dangerously, sanity barely restrained and a strange mix of brokenness and defeat played across his features.

"Not one of your more elegant disputes, hm, Unaven?" he cooed up at him, eyes traveling down each of the iron coils twisting about his body.

"Come to make good on that deal?" Unaven's voice cracked and Davian sneered with disgust at the noise.

"I had planned to but… it seems I'm missing a certain component or two…" he sighed, rocking back on his heels as he thought aloud, "You see I had hoped to catch Kurogane here reigniting the fire in his old mercenary guild and… well… I think you may have gotten a little too greedy for that to work."

"I built this place…" he seethed, blood dribbling down his lips, "…I'm not giving it up."

Davian sucked in a breath through his teeth, breaking the mirage he kept so expertly long enough for him to know Unaven saw his razor-like teeth, "See... _this_ is why I hate working with criminals. You never get the bigger picture."

Unaven's glare faultered.

"You see, unlike you, I keep my word, Unaven. You were to lead Kurogane here, keep him busy long enough for the raid, and _I_ would handle planting the evidence to prove he's a danger to society and you're a victim in all of this. You go free to build your empire and I turn a blind eye for a few years until someone on the Council forces my hand…" he sighed, honestly fed up with the whole situation, "Instead, you fight him for some pointless title and don't even make sure to keep your security in tact enough for me to salvage any evidence…"

"And now we have _another_ issue, Unaven," he met those pained brown eyes again. Doe eyes, was it? Because that was certainly how they looked to Davian in his current helpless state. He surely was quite the damsel in distress, "You didn't tell me you'd worked with Bianca."

"You didn't ask," he fired back harshly, but not without a twist of fear in his voice. Davian cleared his throat.

"Of course… how silly of me," he scratched at the back of his head in a feign of distress, "Father won't like knowing you got away, Unaven… I don't know what he'll do about it. I'm sorry but with this failure I simply _can't_ guarantee your safety."

"Heh… you honestly think that scares me?" he spat and red droplets splashed across Davian's face. The scent of copper made him wrinkle his nose and slowly, deliberately, he let that obscenely long, black tongue snake out to catch what had landed on his cheek. Unaven's bravado faltered and Davian sighed again, stepping away to gaze down at his men as they fought. Most of the mages were already down, there wasn't a whole lot left to clean up. Whatever group that monster of an Iron Dragon Slayer was running with was far more formidable than what he was used to. He supposed it made his job easier… well… the legal part, anyway.

"I have a question, Unaven, and please answer truthfully this time. Your life, or at least your freedom, depends on it," he turned back to the trapped man who regarded him with clear revulsion on his face. He nodded slowly, mutely, like a good little pawn should, and although Unaven knew he certainly wasn't the game master in this scenario that didn't stop the quick flutter in his chest at knowing he was currently this poor man's puppeteer, "How is it that you survived Kurogane? I was under the impression he'd slain _all_ of the men who aided Bianca?"

Unaven opened his mouth and closed it again not unlike a fish out of water.

" _Truthfully_ , Unaven. And I do mean the _entire_ truth."

"He attacked me a few days prior," he tilted his head back slightly, the evidence proudly marring the flesh of his neck and Davian's eyes widened at the thought of the kind of pain that would incite, "I was in a hospital when everything happened."

" _Really_? And how, pray tell, did he get his hands on you?"

"I was in his cell."

The stifled his annoyance, "Doing what, exactly?"

At that Unaven lapsed into silence and Davian's lip quirked nastily, "I assure you whatever you have to say won't reach a court of law."

"I was going to rape him," the words fell from his mouth in a sort of there-I-said-it fashion and Davian's grin quickly turned into a malicious smile.

"You tormented him? After all that talk of him being a man you admired? Revered, even?" Davian snorted and watched as the color drained slowly from Unaven's face, "My mother did once tell me that there was a fine line between love and hate but certainly that is quite bizarre. You really are disturbed."

Unaven stuttered a response but Davian didn't quite hear. A novel idea began to form in his head and as much as he hated the implications he knew that at this point it was a necessity. Slowly, he pulled the white gloves from his hands and pocketed them. Next, he began rolling up his sleeves. Gently at first, he tested the iron. The restraints that curled across the redhead's chest were nearly three inches thick but he presumed he'd have the strength for it.

"I'll have to take back what I said before, Unaven, this didn't seem to be such the lost cause after all."

Unaven fell still and Davian rapped his knuckled gently against the iron.

"I needed a way to get Kurogane in jail and here you are, ripe for the picking… although, I do hate getting my hands dirty."

"What… what do you mean? I thought you said I wouldn't have to testify?" the fear was obvious in his voice and Davian immediately dismissed it.

"Of course not. Didn't I say I always keep my word? I won't ask you to stand in court… no… it'll be much better if you're in a body bag, for several reasons, actually."

"What…?! What the hell do you mean?!" Unaven writhed against his restraints but he was thoroughly trapped. Kurogane was indeed a master at his craft.

Davian clicked his teeth in disapproval. As silence began to fall he knew that the man's screeches would be enough to attract unwanted attention. Pushing down his own revulsion, he pressed the flat of his hand against the man's chest and focused on the feeling he needed to convey. There was no difference at first but very quickly his anger seemed to abate. Well, maybe not _completely_ , but it was more he couldn't respond in the way he wanted even if he tried. It was a simple trick, one he came by naturally as most of his kind did, and as his wide yellow eyes kept Unaven's feral brown he quickly began to see horror flood where only lunacy had thrived before. He dropped his voice, speaking softly and slickly, the way one might to a spooked animal as it was led to its imminent doom.

"Father thought everyone who worked with Bianca was dead," his voice altered slightly, losing a bit its usual smooth tone for something a little truer, more reptilian. It was sort of a hiss that snuck up from the bottom of his throat and eased into his normal speech, just enough to make his victim extremely aware of how inhuman he really was, "He's quite strict about that sort of thing, unfortunately, which means you have to die. But, the good out of all of this is I needed something to land your old idol in jail and… well… revenge on the man that attempted to ravage him while he was defenseless? That's simply too easy, too _simple_ , to pass up. Any judge will believe it enough to give me a warrant _and_ the man was nice enough to give me all the materials I needed."

Without releasing Unaven's eyes or moving the hand from his chest, he gripped a hold of the iron and pulled. The metal groaned wearily and it took more force than he'd originally anticipated to rend it into a point. He pushed his makeshift knife into Unaven's flesh and for just a moment tore his eyes away to accomplish his task. The man didn't scream, or rather, _couldn't_ scream, not with Davian's bare flesh pressed against his. The whole process was far slower than he would have liked. He had to endure every sick crunch of ribs and sternum, feel the slick of hot blood run across his exposed hand.

"You… fucking… bast… ard…" Unaven was choking on his own blood, his voice not more than a pained whimper. Davian took a step back and admired his work. The man hung loosely, chest crushed and run through, blood trickling down him like a crimson robe. In his last act of defiance, those brown eyes bore into him, refusing to show fear in his last few breaths.

"Bastard I may very well be," he hummed, running his tongue down his hand and catching the savory scarlet, "but you're dead so… honestly… who's the one at loss here?"

He left before those brown eyes were cold and dead, a little tickled with himself at how cruel he could be when he truly wanted to. As he turned, though, he found himself face to face with cadet Serrill and for a split second panic raced up his spine. The man's eyes were wide and his hand was clasped tightly to his sabre.

"L-Lieutenant Bishop…"

"Please, call me Davian," he placed a hand on the man's shoulder, eyes still wide and very much not human, "We're going to be working a lot closer with each other, after all."

Serrill's eyes dilated and his gaze was immediately distant as Davian's concentration bore into the poor man's mind like some sort of worm, "Yes… sir…"

"Good boy," he hummed and went to step past him, "You're being promoted."

"I… I am?" his voice held clear confusion, "May I ask why, sir?"

Davian stopped and turned to look at him, his mirage firmly back in place, voice smooth and filled with concern as he crooked a slight grin at the man, "Why… for finding the evidence we needed to finally put that bastard Kurogane behind bars. I'm very proud of you, cadet, but… are you alright?"

"I…" he looked to the ground, through the smoke, still fighting whatever Davian had done to his mind, "I'm not sure."

"Well, you were hit fairly hard on the head by one of those mages, cadet. Why don't we get you down stairs? You don't look your best… maybe some water?"

"Right… yes… thank you, Sir."


	53. Chapter 53

Upon waking, Gajeel was first hit with a splitting headache worming its way through his skull and second that it was deep into the night. His body was stiff and he felt like he was clawing free of his own grave just to force his eyes open. He gasped at the sudden searing fingers of pain that raced across his torso when he went to move. It was enough to almost put him back under again but he gritted his teeth and pushed through it. In too much of a rush he pushed back the blanket that covered him and in the dim light of the moon viewed stark white, hastily wrapped bandages. His migraine responded to his sudden movements vindictively, rising in its ferocity and tearing like white fire through his skull. His mouth tasted like blood again and his vision blurred.

"Shit."

He took a moment to steady himself and let the throbbing in his head ease. He blinked through the fog in his vision until he was finally able to make out the vague shapes of his companions. Freed and Bickslow slept near each other with Evergreen curled a few feet away, her caramel hair splayed out around her in complete disarray. Laxus leaned against a tree at his side, arms crossed as he must have fallen asleep either keeping watch or determined to be awake when Gajeel came to. Gajeel realized his head must have been resting in the blonde's lap and a small smile came to his lips as he gazed over at him.

The biting scent of iron stirred his attention, reminding his stomach of how voracious it was. He whipped his head around in search of his meal – dizzy from the action itself – and could have rejoiced when his eyes alighted on a bag of railroad spikes which must have been lifted from the train car they'd made their escape in. Gajeel gritted his teeth and clumsily pushed himself to his feet. His legs shook pitifully and he had to catch himself on the tree lest he tumble back to the ground and wake everyone. It was a long moment before he felt sure enough to step forward and lift the satchel off the ground. The clinking of metal had his mouth watering before he'd crossed the boundary of Freed's runes into the bitter night air.

He didn't wander too far from their little camp, just far enough so the grinding and snapping of metal against his teeth wouldn't disturb the others. He came to a small clearing and eased himself to the ground, panting with the effort of it, and clutching at his ribs as vicious pain made itself known in his chest. At least one rib was definitely broken, but he wasn't coughing up blood so he assumed that was a good enough sign.

He knew he was a mess. He could feel his hair sticking to the back of his neck and the sides of his face. His hands moved clumsily through weakness and the influence muscles being shocked one too many times. But the more as ate he felt better; quickly he found that his headache eased, the debilitating quaking in his limbs subsided, and the intense throbbing through his ribs became less and less demanding. He leaned back into the frost-trimmed grass and took a shuttering breath of frigid air. The night was cloudless and the moon shone like a beacon down on him, washing the world around him in silver. In the middle of nowhere, with no influence of city lights, he felt he could probably gaze straight into infinity. Stars blanketed the inky black sky, tiny pinpricks of shuttering light.

Despite the pain and weakness that still weighed him heavy, Gajeel felt like a child again. He huffed out a visible breath as he munched away at his iron wistfully, turning his mind to memories of winter nights on Metalicana's back as his father showed him every inch of the pitch-black sky. He recalled lullabies aimed at scaring the darkness away as he was clutched by massive claws and a voice that made the forest shiver with its power and pride. He hummed quietly a tune that didn't seem quite right coming from his mouth, sang softly words that weren't meant for man to pronounce.

It was strange, this feeling that settled in the center of his chest. He felt calm. Even deeper than that he felt simple. It was a way he hadn't been since he'd been hurled violently into adulthood by Phantom Lord. Maybe he'd finally left it all behind him, he'd finally said goodbye. Laxus's words resonated in his mind. _You always have a choice_.

For the first time in his life he felt like he actually did.

As he finished his sixth spike, or maybe it was his seventh, he became acutely aware of eyes gazing at him and the hair on the back of his neck stood on end. Swallowing hard, he finally dragged his gaze from his improvised meal. Laxus was standing at the edge of the wood, eyes blinking through the darkness to him. In that instant, he reminded Gajeel of a toddler waking to a parent's raucous in the middle of the night, demanding what it was that woke them so they could go back to sleep and rest easy. He pulled his coat close around his shoulders, blanket in hand, and stepped cautiously into the clearing. Golden eyes shimmered almost platinum in the moon's vibrant light and even the tawny of his hair seemed to glint white. He was a god of the night approaching him, fists shaking slightly from the cold as he folded into the grass at Gajeel's side.

"How are you feelin'?" his words slurred with sleep and he stifled a yawn.

"Weird." Gajeel admitted, not making any move to sit up for fear of white hot fire in his chest.

Laxus gazed down at him for a long moment before dragging his eyes down his chest, "How's that looking?"

For the first time Gajeel really regarded the bandages. Sitting up gently, he began tearing through them to reveal the deep purples and blues of bruises. They blossomed from his side and across his ribs before resting at his diaphragm.

"Shit…" Laxus breathed, eyes darkening with worry, "I can numb that again… until you can see Wendy."

Gajeel blinked wordlessly for a moment, refusing to make eye contact. The remembrance of the what happened in the train stuck out in his head. The utter loss of control over how his body reacted made him feel sick to his stomach. His spine locking, his eyes rolling back, and he was sure a none-to-glorious noise had twisted from his throat when it happened. Just thinking about it made his skin crawl and scalp prickle.

"I don't know, Sparky…" he said at length, trying to hid the leeriness he felt, "Not sure I wanna go through all that again."

Laxus turned his head away again, brushing his thumb against the bottom point of his scar as he did. Gajeel clicked his teeth, fit to change the subject to something that didn't involve him having to endure more electrocution, when he heard Laxus let out a tense breath.

"It's easy to forget," Laxus stated each word slowly and without looking at him. There was a tinge of guilt in Laxus's voice that startled him to no small degree, "that you react differently to my magic. If I scared you in the train… I'm sorry."

Gajeel straightened at his words, completely blindsided by the apology. It wasn't that he thought Laxus would hurt him unapologetically, but he did think Laxus just didn't realize how devastatingly strong he was. It didn't help that their magics were naturally combative; like fire and gasoline, he supposed. And now he felt guilt pulling at his chest, telling him that he was being too harsh when it was clear his partner had only meant to help him. He was suddenly exhausted and he picked at his nail for a moment before offering a reply.

"Honestly, Laxus," his voice was more scathing than he had really intended and he certainly didn't miss the way Laxus jumped at hearing Gajeel use his name as opposed to one of his preferred pet names, "there's a short list of things that scares me and yer magic didn't make the cut. It pisses me off that you'd think it does."

As he kept speaking his tone lost more and more of its severity and he stared pointedly at his boots, refusing to make eye contact with the blonde, "I never had the luxury of working with a team before. Ya gotta understand, I'm used ta having to push myself past my limit. It's one of the things I take pride in… finding a way to keep going when really I shouldn't be able ta…" he paused, reigning in his thoughts for just a moment, "I don't refuse yer help because I'm scared. If I were a good enough mage I wouldn't need it."

He glanced through raven locks to see Laxus's aurous eyes shimmering down at him patiently. It was written all across his face the words he wanted to say but knew Gajeel wouldn't particularly welcome. _You have a team now. You're a part of Fairy Tail._

You're not alone anymore.

He blinked slowly. He wasn't, was he? He hadn't been alone for a long time but he wasn't able to accept it until now. Slowly, everything he thought he'd known about himself was rolling of his shoulders like an avalanche. Despite the trepidation in his stomach he cleared his throat and flipped his ebony curtain over one shoulder perhaps a tad too dramatically, as it flared once again the pain in his chest. He'd be a liar if he said he didn't feel uncomfortably exposed with his neck and chest bared to Laxus like some sort of vampiric offering.

He forced himself to unclench his jaw, "If it makes ya feel better."

He must have stunned the blonde with that reaction because Laxus's brows rose immediately in response, "What?"

"I said if it makes ya feel better, go ahead," he insisted, trying not to trip over his tongue in the process.

"You… you're serious?"

Gajeel forced the corner of his mouth up in a hesitant smirk and cocked a studded eyebrow at him, "You better hurry before I change my mind."

"You know I can tell when you're nervous, don't you?" Laxus turned towards him and damn him if his heart didn't falter a few beats as he did.

"I said I wasn't scared… didn't say shit about being nervous," he admitted through tight lips, leaning himself onto his elbows so he could track Laxus's movements. The slight stretch made him wince.

"You're a lot of talk, aren't you?" it was a playful jab aimed at easing is worry but Gajeel didn't feel any less tense.

"Yer the one who said all us Phantom Mages were more of a show than anythin' else," he could feel the air charge and it took more control than he would have ever admitted aloud to keep his voice from shaking.

"You _are_ showy,"

"You like it."

It was when Laxus reached for him that Gajeel finally let slip just how uneasy he was. He snapped his hand up and grabbed Laxus's wrist as it hovered inches above his skin. This time it was Laxus's turn to raise a critical eyebrow at him, though there wasn't even a shred of humor in his eyes any longer. The slightest bit of hurt played there, though he'd not voice it. Gajeel swore.

"Don't look at me like that," he hissed, forcing himself to release his overly tight grip, "It's just… you have more magical energy in one leg than I probably have in my whole damn body. You're a walking thunder storm and I'm a fucking human lightning rod."

Laxus's expression softened, "You sell yourself short."

"Do you have any idea how hard it was to admit you're stronger than me? Take the compliment."

A sly grin lit up Laxus's eyes, "I'm flattered."

"Good."

"Am I allowed to touch you now?"

Gajeel didn't realize he'd been progressively leaning farther and farther away from Laxus as he'd edged closer. He _did_ however notice how close Laxus was. So close that his heat fell off of him in waves with his magical energy and it all billowed down on him in that intimidating presence the blonde always held about him. He was very viscerally ripped back in time to the night they'd been in the hot spring. Laxus was gazing down at him all over again, attempting to convince the nervous raven he wouldn't do anything to hurt him, urging him to trust that Laxus could stay in perfect control and all would be fine if he could just let go. Gajeel laughed tensely and when he spoke it was barely a whisper.

"Ya look like you're gonna to kill me again." Gajeel felt awkward and heat was starting to creep up his chest and throat. Laxus's eyes widened with recognition, his smile became a touch more tender than it previously had been. Porcelain fingers brushed as gentle as the touch of a feather against aggressively bruised skin.

His response was not one of verbal reply but rather an action that made Gajeel have to clamp his mouth shut. The shock from Laxus's hand was so light, so loving, that there wasn't a single ounce of pain or even discomfort. It didn't cause his muscles to become rigid, didn't send explosive agony zinging through his every inch of his being. The feeling was delicate and extremely intimate; Laxus smoothed his hand against Gajeel's skin in a gentle caress that made him swallow damningly. Aureate eyes were alight with intensity as he studied Gajeel's reaction and hot blush rushed to the tips of Iron Mage's ears. On an impulse, he whipped his hand around to snatch Laxus's wrist away. Electricity flitted up the blonde's palm to the tips of his fingers, snapping quiet static into the air before Laxus released his magic and the swell of energy dissipated, almost making Gajeel feel cold with its absence. He was suddenly aware that he was out breath.

"I wasn't done." Laxus's voice slipped like residual lightning down Gajeel's spine and he leaned close. Gajeel collapsed into the frozen grass, briefly wondering how it was his heat alone wasn't melting the ice. Laxus's crystalline breath hovered just above his lips, "Can I try again?"

"Laxus…" he whispered, the words holding more breathless desire than he would have hoped. A cold hand slipped across his torso but the shock never came. Instead, pale and cold-chapped lips were pressing against each other. Hot breath filled the immediate space with gasps and sighs as Laxus pulled himself over Gajeel and rocked into him possessively.

"You're amazing, you know," Laxus crooned into his mouth, eyes half-lidded and gazing into Gajeel's as if he could somehow instill his sincerity with just the look, "I'm convinced you can do anything."

"I didn't-" he couldn't argue through Laxus's persistent mouth as it stole his words away with each kiss, his tongue dodging out to silence him whenever he tried.

"Even running for your life from Enforcement you're the sexiest thing on this earth," he sighed, trailing kisses down his jaw and slipping his hand to pull Gajeel's chest to his own. Gajeel arched his back, sent fingers clawing under his partner's jacket to ball into his shirt. Pain ebbed into his consciousness, reminding him of his injury even as it lacked its prior savagery.

"Funny… I was gonna say the same about you," his words were almost wanton in Laxus's ear and it seemed to ignite the man even more. He pressed his knee between Gajeel's thighs and rutted against him as he ran his tongue against the raven's throat. Gajeel moaned, wincing as he sucked in a ragged breath.

"Laxus…" he arched against him again, exacerbating Laxus's desire in his search for friction. The pain in his ribs grew steadily and there was a quiet voice in the back of his mind telling him if they didn't stop it would take even longer for his wounds to heal. He fought to ignore it by pulling Laxus's lips back to his own and stealing the warmth he found there, running his tongue against the blonde's in frantic demand. The pain was too much, though, and he quickly found himself panting and holding Laxus apart from him, trying to keep his breaths shallow so as to lessen his discomfort. Laxus scowled.

"Ah fuck… I'm sorry. I keep… _shit_ ," he pushed himself up onto his heels and Gajeel felt winter settle into his bones without Laxus to keep him warm. He smirked through his grimace, though, and reached wildly up to grip onto the blonde's collar and pull him back down again.

"Do I look like I'm glass, Sparky?" he growled against his lips, content to just struggle through the pain if it meant Laxus would stay pressed to his chest.

"Your fucking ribs are broken," Laxus murmured into his mouth, taking care to keep his weight on his hands, "Glass or not that shit hurts."

Gajeel rolled his eyes but relented. This time when he pulled Laxus down he pulled him against his shoulder. Laxus seemed startled for a moment before settling around him, his head resting into the raven's chest and a long, pale arm wandering gently around his torso. He pulled his blanket over them although he knew Gajeel didn't need it. The raven seemed content even in the frigid late autumn night.

"What were you singing earlier?" Laxus yawned, slipping his free hand down to intertwine their fingers.

"Hm? Oh… the lullaby."

"Didn't sound like any lullaby I ever heard,"

Gajeel chuckled, "My dad used to sing it."

"Really?" Laxus's voice filled the air with honey and Gajeel couldn't stop himself from watching him. Auric eyes fought to stay open as he got more and more comfortable under Gajeel's arm. His cheeks were still tinged the slightest shade of pink and his lips bruised, ready for him to claim if he desired. Gajeel brushed his fingers against Laxus's chin, tilting his face up to him just enough that he could make out more of his pale neck. Even his scar looked beautiful as it crossed his eye, and it was when he found himself staring down at this that he noticed Laxus's wry expression, "What?"

"Nothing…" Gajeel whispered, suddenly feeling something pulling at the bottom of his heart as he swam in gilded eyes, "I just think I've lost my mind."

Laxus chuckled, "Should I ask why?"

"Because I swear you're the most beautiful thing I've ever seen."

"That was cheesy as hell," Laxus scoffed despite red suddenly surged up his cheeks.

"It's true,"

"I think you're just delirious from pain," Laxus curled into him, finally letting his eyes close, "That or blood loss."

"Blood loss?"

"Probably internal. You'll be dead by morning."

"And if I still think you're beautiful in the morning?"

Laxus seemed to consider it for a moment, "At that point it's just poor taste."

"Gihi, gotcha."

In the morning Evergreen woke and was startled to see the both Laxus and Gajeel were gone. She wrapped her blanket around herself and walked into the forest, eyes following two pairs of boot prints in the dirt. When she found them they were still wrapped around each other, Laxus with his fingers still intertwined in Gajeel's and head resting on his shoulder. He was running his thumb over the studs in his partner's ear and when he heard her approach he only briefly flashed his eyes up to her. She smirked at him quietly and turned back to camp. After slight deliberation, she laid down between Freed and Bickslow and they reacted to her added warmth by leaning closer into her.

A few more hours rest, she supposed, would do them all just fine.

* * *

 **Author's Note:**

 **Oof.** **Sorry this one is a little late, guys. You'd never have guessed but I rewrote this damn chapter 3 times, all 3 attempts wildly different from each other before I finally settled on this. Our boys need a little sweetness, amirite?**

 **I'm trying to stay in the swing of things for you guys and post once a week but I will warn you now that my next post will probably be late. I usually get most of my writing done on the weekend and this week is my son's birthday (he's turning 3 and my fragile heart just can't take it) so I'll be a little busier than usual this weekend. Hopefully I'll still have a chapter for you Monday, though. Fingers crossed!**

 **As always, thank you all for your support :) You guys keep me going.**

 **Until next chapter! Have a good week! Kick some butt! And don't kill anyone I know!**

 **Your friendly neighborhood StevMarie**


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